---- Day two ----
"Up and at them Sis! It's a brand new day and I am not going to let you sleep it away." Samantha's voice pierced my sleep, abruptly ending my dream. What was I dreaming about again? Is it really gone already? So far, both times I had woken up as a pony were sudden and very disorienting. I lifted my muzzle from my pillow, inhaling the sweet flowery scents drifting in through my open window. Ugh, Sam opened my window. How dare she let me smell the pleasantries of summer! Opening my eyes, I found that my room was surprisingly dark. I lifted my head, searching for Sam, but she was nowhere to be found. I looked back at the pillow, studying the pony head shaped imprint I had left.
I shook my head, before rolling to my left and sliding straight off my bed foreleg first. I felt my hind legs slide off the bed too, and as my hooves touched the ground my body gave a slight bounce before all my hooves were on the ground once more. I lifted every hoof one at a time, stretching them all out. Finally I flared out my wings, and pushed my front and back pairs of hooves away from each other, closing my eyes as I found myself enjoying the feeling of my muscles tensing up. I didn't realize exactly how far into my stretch I was until my my muzzle poked the carpet. I opened my eyes, and twisting my head back I found myself in a very cat-like pose. I curled my body back together, meeting my hind legs with my forelegs as my back arched upwards. Crick! my spine proclaimed, signalling that I was sufficiently stretched out.
I licked my lips, and finding them a tad dry I began wondering if I should head downstairs and find some water or wait for Sam to come back. She would probably be a bit surprised to see me out of bed, since when I was a human I definitely hadn't been a morning person. Her normal routine for getting me up for school had included telling me to get out of bed at least three times.
I still wasn't technically a morning person, now I was a morning pony.
And I wasn't just any morning pony, I was Aurora Drift, The pegasus who- Actually I still have no idea what Aurora is like, so I don't think I can really give myself a proper title just yet.
Last night had been both the least eventful and the most important night of my life. Well, technically I've had less eventful nights, but the most important parts holds strong. Last night, as I had been trying to fight becoming Aurora, desperately clinging to the last of my humanity, I realized something that made me a great deal more accepting of my situation. While I had been gaining equinity and becoming more like Aurora, I had thought I was losing what was left of Leslie and losing my humanity.
Truthfully, I hadn't lost a single bit of who I used to be, I had simply gained bits of who Aurora was. All my old memories were still intact, all my experiences and knowledge were still there. I was still Leslie after all, I was just also Aurora at the same time.
Or at least, I would be if I knew who Aurora was. Aside from a few speaking mannerisms, muscle memories, and other habits, I had next to nothing involving knowledge about the pony I had become. For all I knew Aurora and Leslie could be practically twins, with both of us living the same life only with one living in Equestria and the other on Earth. But then again, we could be complete opposites, I had no idea.
"Okay, Sis, attempt two, you- Oh what? You're actually up?" Sam finally returned, and looked a little startled. She had a glass of water with her, which I hoped she hadn't been planning to douse my head with. "I- Good morning I guess?" She set her glass of water safely down on my bedside table. She then proceeded to sit on my bed and give me a stare.
"What?" I asked, wondering why she was staring at me. Her eyes flicked to the left, and I realized she was studying me.
She gave a shrug, "Nothing." She turned her head, while reaching towards her pocket and pulling out-
"If it's nothing, why are you pulling out your notebook? What are you writing?" She had produced her favorite little notepad and a well used pencil from her sweat-pant pocket, and was scratching something down while still feigning innocence.
"Absolutely nothing." She said again, as her lips flashed a tiny smile for just a fraction of a second. What is she writing? Sam didn't use her notepad unless she was writing about things that were actually interesting. I scrambled back up onto my bed, and frowned at her as she stood up and walked calmly away from me, shielding her notes with her chest. I was left on the bed, with a serious speed disadvantage due to my lack of size.
"Okay fine, I didn't care about your notes anyway." I harrumphed, turning my head away and pointing my muzzle skywards. I did care of course, but unless I learned how to fly and/or maneuver around my room faster and less clumsily I didn't have a hope of even seeing the inside of the notebook.
"Excellent! Then I am victorious." She scratched down one especially loud note, before putting the book away and returning to staring at me blankly. I returned the look, engaging myself in the sudden staring contest. It lasted nearly a full minute before I again repeated my original question.
"What?"
Sam returned another shrug, it looked like she didn't know what to say either. Okay, break the ice. Start a conversation. "Have anything planned for today?" She shook her head. Unusual, I thought, knowing that Sam usually had a plan for every day of the week, whether it be a work day or a day off. "It's a Sunday right?" A nod confirmed. Silence continued. Am I- Is Aurora just an anti-social pony? Or is Sam just especially quiet today? I was pretty sure it was the latter, but again I didn't know enough about Aurora just yet to be sure.
"So how about this weather?" I got a snicker and a rolling of eyes, but no more than that. I sat down on my bed, wondering if Sam was just going to be quietly staring at my walls all day. She wasn't even staring at me even more, it was beginning to get a little disconcerting. I turned my head away from her as well, finding my eyes turned to the glass of water Sam had left over here.
I grasped it in both of my hooves, noticing both a feeling of cold through the glass and a feeling of warmth from the passive magic sneaking through my hooves. I didn't even have to think about it anymore, magic just happened. I lifted the glass to my lips, taking an obnoxiously loud slurp.
"So yeah, Mom and Dad called." PFFFFFFFFTTTTT I found myself performing a perfect spit take, and I would later find myself wishing someone had recorded it. At the moment though, I was busy sorting through the sudden flurry of thoughts as my mind fell into a minor-panic.
What did they say?! No wonder Sam was so quiet. Did she tell them I turned into a pony? "How's Mackerel doing?" My mouth asked, ignoring all the obvious questions and jumping straight to the bizarre.
"He's- What? That's really your first question? You turned into a mare and when our parents call you wanna know how our dog is doing?"
"I know, I'm surprised too."
"He's probably good, they didn't really say." I waited for her to continue, but Sam went back to her silence, though now with easily noticeable worry in her eyes. What did THEY SAY!?!?
The ultimate question still hung in the room, though neither of us asked it or answered it. Ever since we had been kids we had a game we used to play, in which neither of us would tell the other anything unless it was directly asked. We would try and find out everything we could with the least amount of questions, and anything above four questions was considered a loss. I hadn't played it for at least a couple of years, but judging by Sam's silence it was apparent we were playing it now. I don't know why she chose to start playing it, seeing as how she was probably bursting with things to tell me, but once we started we couldn't call it off.
I asked the ultimate question, "So, did you tell them about my... Predicament?" I tensed up, expecting the worst.
"I didn't have the chance." She informed me, raising even more questions. "By the way. are we playing that question game? I was just being quiet for dramatic effect, but..."
Didn't have the chance? Why wouldn't Sam have a chance? Were they cut short? Were they being kidnapped mid-call? Or was it something a bit more likely, like they had some news that was even bigger and therefore didn't have the patience to talk? "Of course we are! Can't stop now Sis. What did they tell you that was so important they didn't have time to hear about how their son was a pony?"
Sam nodded grimly. She had a very love-hate relationship with this game, seeing as how she only liked playing it when she had a chance to ask the questions. "Well, it's not exactly easy news to take."
I took another attempt at a sip of water, succeeding this time. I swallowed, and explained, "I was turned into a pony yesterday, effectively rendering my life as over. That was pretty hard news to take, and I got over that. Try me." I took another sip, expecting something just a tad lighter than the news I received.
"You and Mackerel aren't the only quadrupedal members of the family."
My mind didn't work for a few seconds, so I was safely able to finish my sip with no risk of a second spit take. I just kind of nodded, without actually understanding what I just heard. Then my mind processed, and tried to give me a few bogus answers.
We... Got a new puppy. Best day ever. No. That's not right.
I looked at Sam's face, and my mind processed that just like her face, it had to be serious. We adopted a pony. I- No, that's not right either. Come on, you know this one.
One or both of my parents have turned into a pony. Yep, that's the one, good job mind. Now what is the correct response in this type of situation?
I didn't say anything for a little while, and discovered I had somehow sipped away the half a glass of water without even realizing it. I glanced off to the side and repeated a question from much earlier, this time with a much quieter tone. "So, how about this weather?" Sam nodded grimly.
I put the glass of water back on my table, and adopted the same blank stare Sam had been giving me earlier, it was uncomfortably easy to see why she was so glum now. "Right. I-" I started, but didn't have any words to describe my feelings. Angry, upset, volatile, outraged, saddened, excited, crestfallen, melancholy, confused- "I'm going to go get a breath of fresh air." I proclaimed, slipping back off my bed for the second time and letting my tiny legs carry me where they may. Sam watched me leave the room, and turned to follow me.
Hang on, excited? What? My thoughts weren't making sense, though what else was new. I was already halfway down the stairs, but my mind was definitely paying attention to other things. Why was excited in my list? I blamed Aurora's side of my mind, seeing as she might be excited to have family going through the same things as her. To not be alone.
That's not a might, that's a definitely. So far the easiest way to tell when I had borrowed one of Aurora's memories was to simply pay close attention to my thoughts, and point out to myself what didn't make sense to think of as a human. I had just learned something about her, the fact that she was lonely.
I wasn't in the most sympathetic of moods right then. "Is it just one of them? Or-" I began asking Sam, whose footsteps were still audible behind me.
"Aside from Dad, I'm the last two-leg around." She informed me with a weak attempt at a chuckle. We reached the bottom of the stairs, and I continued straight through the living room and out the back door, arriving quickly at the porch. I don't even remember using any sort of magic to open the door, it just swung open when I walked up to it. I wouldn't have known I even used magic if I hadn't had felt the sudden warmth, though then again that could just be the warm summer air. It was sunny, really sunny. A bright summer's day with lazy clouds and a fresh wind blowing eastward. The sun was almost right above, making the entire plastic roof of the closed off deck glow angrily.
I finally stopped moving, having stopped right before the stairs that would lead into the wide open and shady backyard. Just a few steps more, and the open sky was mine. I can't even fly, why am I craving open spaces? Well, maybe I could fly, I just hadn't tried it yet. No, stop that. There are more important thing's to do than think about flying right now.
There was a deck chair in a very lounged out position to my right. I glanced at Sam, who was cross-armed and looking very uncomfortable in the bright sunlight. Okay, she's not taking that chair. I hopped up, then flopped down. laying in a sphinx-like position.
"Okay, one of us is comfortable, tell me the entire conversation." I requested, knowing I wasn't exactly going to like what I was going to hear.
Sam had finished explaining our Mom's conversation with her a few minutes ago now. I had begun feeling a dull feeling in my stomach, like pain but not quite. It was more like a feeling of being sick, but I was perfectly healthy. Remorseful, sorrowful, empathetic, sympathetic- "Sympathy is a pretty big one," I muttered to myself quietly, though not really saying anything aloud. Sam had already wandered back inside, leaving me with the news.
Mom had taken her transformation into a small furred creature with hooves about as well as I had. Only she hadn't accepted it, and was still freaking out. Dad was trying her best to comfort her, but there wasn't really much he could do so long as Mom thought that this was all permanent.
Sam came back out of the house, equipped with a pair of sunglasses on her face. She waltzed over to the fence of our deck, seeming to study the cool grass. I came over and joined her, rearing up and trying to lean on the fence as well. It didn't work so well when I was half her height, but resting my jaw on the fence totally counts.
"This is really screwed up. Everything." Sam stated, as if realizing this for the first time. I attempted to nod, but almost lost my dangerous balance on the bottom of the fence. Sam looked at me with pity, before lifting me up and placing me on top of the narrow wooden ledge. My wings shot out as I tried to find my balance, while Sam returned to her contemplative pose. I managed to find my missing balance, and sat down carefully. "Up until Mom, I really did think it was all fun and games, and that you weren't appreciating a good thing." Sam continued.
"Yeah. I kind of noticed that. If I recall you were almost yelling at me over it."
"Yeah, sorry." She said simply. Sam had never been good with apologies, but then again neither had I, so I knew exactly how hard it was for her to have this conversation.
"I just-" She tried, and gave up, evidently not liking the vocalization of the feelings she was having.
I laid a hoof on her shoulder, "Sam, I get it. I would have done the same thing. Neither of us are ever serious when we need to be."
"It's not that- Well, it is. It's more than-" A collection of moisture on her cheek surrounded by reddening skin told me she had been crying a fair bit when she had gone inside. She was probably wearing the sunglasses so I wouldn't have to see her like this, a shame it didn't really work.
In all her years of caring and looking after me, I had seen Sam cry maybe twice or three times. The rest of the time, I had gotten the impression that she was hardened and willful. Her original idea was to convince her little brother that she was some sort of super hero, so that he wouldn't cry. He wouldn't cry because Super Sammy was there, and she was the greatest and bravest Sister on earth.
I was about four or five years old, don't judge me.
"It's just- A little more than I thought it would be. I didn't really get what was going on. How many people this- This is effecting."
"I- Yeah. I Didn't get it either."
"Yeah you did. You got it and then you went and got over it. It happened to you and you got over it."
"And you can get over it too!"
Sam's face broke into a smile. "You too can get over it, for the low price of $9.99!" I shared her smile, and the conversation faded away. We gazed out at the tall hedge that marked the edge of our property, saying nothing. Sam mumbled something at one point, but aside from that we enjoyed the quiet company of early summer morning birds and an eerie lack of traffic noises. It could be that our house was isolated from the sounds of the roads, but of course no one would be driving today anyway. You know, seeing as everyone is trying their hardest not to panic at the furry talking things that used to be human.
It was a wonder I didn't hear screams or sirens anywhere. Then again, I still hadn't checked the news this morning, maybe everyone had started living in harmony and I was the only person having issues with being a pony.
Oh yeah, the news. Hadn't the government promised they would be issuing a bill or a declaration or some sort of state of emergency today? I really needed to check on that, see if being a pony was legal or whatever.
I could do that later though, right now I decided I would stay here and enjoy the peace and quiet with Sam.
Eventually my thoughts began to wander, as they always do. So Mom's a pony now. I mean, I guess my mother was always a pony, seeing as I'm a pony. It was getting easier to accept that, but it still didn't seem quite right. Leslie's mother is a pony now. I tried again, and found that it sounded right. Why does it sound right? What does right sound like? If a right falls in the forest, what sound does it make? How about a left?
I glanced over at Sam, but she was puzzling over her own thoughts so I decided to go back to mine. I really have to get my head together. That was definitely true. It felt both wrong and right to think of myself as Aurora, and that wasn't okay. I didn't want to be unsure of who I was and who I was supposed to be, I had already done that for most of my life. And just when I decided I wanted to put work aside and go to a film school, I stopped being who I had been up until now. Would Aurora want to go to film school? What does she want to do? What do I want to do?
I wanted to stop being so confused. Okay then. Operation Anti-confusion is a go. I just had to get a second opinion or two first. I directed my gaze towards Sam again and asked, "Hey Sis, what'cha thinking about?" As if I didn't know. Her thoughts were obviously going to be about Mom and what She-
"Actually, I'm wondering about this weird hole I saw last night."
-What? I wasn't quite expecting that, what interest could a hole possibly have? I decided to hold the question I had been planning to ask off until later. "A hole? Why a hole? What did it ever do to you? Seriously though, why are you thinking about holes at a time like this?"
"Oh, you know. It was a really interesting hole. Like, you should really see it." She told me, before looking away and walking back towards the house again. Come back! I need to ask you something for operation anti-confusion to work!
"What? Descriptions Sis! Use them!" I demanded with futility, as Sam opened the door and slipped into the house with nothing more than a sly smile. Does she expect me to just... Follow her? What if I had important things to do today, and didn't have luxury time to go follow her everywhere! I did have luxury time of course, but that wasn't the point! I trailed after her, my magic giving a gentle tug on the door, as it-
My head swam with dizziness, and I barely made it through the door I had just swung open violently. WOAH, what was that? I thought I was getting the hang of magic! Why am I on the verge of passing out again? As soon as I had felt the now somewhat familiar feeling, everything went wrong. My stomach crumpled up, and I got an absolute feeling of nausea for a split second.
I turned my head around to glare at the door, wondering what had gone wrong. I guess I was a little distant, but I shouldn't have gotten that kind of reaction! I turned my head back to see that Sam was leagues ahead of me, already slipping her running shoes on. She completely ignored the fact that I had almost knocked myself out again, and seemed focused on taking me out to whatever hole she had found. Must be a really interesting hole! I wonder if- I wondered, before realizing I wasn't sure what I was wondering about. Was that another of Aurora's 'almost thoughts?'
I was beginning to call the strange uncompleted thoughts I would get from time to time 'almost thoughts'. I was pretty sure they were from the original un-Leslie-ified Aurora's subconscious, but of course I could always just be crazy. I liked to think that I was getting messages from my original self though, like-
Okay, that was definitely an Aurora thought.
Sam finally gave a tug on the door, and nodded in my direction. "Hurry up Sis! I don't actually know if it's still there!" Before turning the corner and disappearing behind the wall. I cantered after her, and-
"Hold it! You want me to go out into public just like that? I'm not even dressed! I've never been in public like this!" I skidded to a stop just within inches of being officially outside for the first time as a pony. Huh, until I said it I hadn't even noticed I wasn't wearing clothes. I guess it just feels natural now.
"Well, does it need to be a momentous event? Do you need a drum roll?" Sam inquired, peeking her head back around the corner. "Come on Sis! You've been outside lots of times, just pretend you're wearing a fur coat. Which you kind of are, it's just a little more skin tight than most."
I gaped at her, "It really isn't as easy as you're making it sound! Everyone is going to see me! I can't just-"
She grabbed at my hoof and tugged, "You CAN just, now come on! It's like diving into a cold pool, you gotta do it all at once!" But I liked going in an inch at a time!
I shook my head and hoof, freeing the latter from Sam's clutches. "I really am not ready for this at all. Just, give me a second or two Sis." She stood up, and counted off the seconds on her fingers. "Stop that. I'm just not ready."
She sighed, and proceeded to walk towards the end of the driveway. "Okay, let me know when you're ready Sis. Just consider one little thing," she said as she turned back to face me, "You can't stay inside the rest of your life, why not get it over with while I'm still going to be right beside you?"
Ooh, good point. It was definitely better to do this while I was with Sam. Doing it alone would be ridiculous. I took a deep breath, raised a hoof towards the sunlit doorway, and-
"I can't do this it's too hard!" I blurted out, retracting my hoof and directing a pout towards Sam. She offered me a facepalm, in response I shrugged my wings. I turned my line of sight back to the doorway, wondering why this was so hard for me. Does Aurora have crippling social anxiety? What is my problem? It really is just going outside, and the being naked thing really doesn't bother me at this point. I had stopped caring about the clothing thing quite a while back, why was I using it as an excuse to avoid moving forwards in life?
I gave a sigh once more, and asked myself, What would Aurora do? I got no answer of course, because I was Aurora, and I was hoping for a response from myself. What would I do?
I wouldn't care what other people think, and I would go enjoy the bright summer day. My hoof brought itself forward, followed by the rest of my body. I'm a pegasus, and I spent most of my free time growing up flying around and gliding from cloud to cloud. I began building up a bit of momentum, and caught up to Sam in seconds. She gave me a thumbs up, and joined me in a light jog.
But I wasn't paying attention to her. I'm a pony, and if people want to stare or gawk then let them. It has no reason to bother me. Light jog continues, more at seven.
Why would I ever contain myself indoors when I have a whole world to enjoy out here? Indoors is small. Indoors is boring. When I'm indoors, I'm missing the entire purpose of being a pegasus. I sped up a bit more, Sam probably told me to slow down or take it easy, but no way was that happening. Not when I was like this. Not when I was finally beginning to understand. The reason to be Aurora, to be a pegasus. To finally enjoy my predicament for once.
To be free.
My wings gave a gentle flap or two, and my hooves tucked up close to my stomach. I began to glide down the street at a low altitude, before flapping again one or twice and then staying spread out. They tilted upwards ever so slightly, and I began to rise higher into the air. Sam was easily left behind now, as I approached ludicrous speeds. Certainly faster than Leslie had ever run. My tail flicked ever so slightly to the right, and any balance I had just been losing was restored. My gums were stretched into a smile of pure glee, as I glanced up. Two thousand meters or so to the nearest cloud. Should I risk it?
"That's not the right direction!" We're going to the park Sis!"
And just like that, all the Aurora-ish just vanished, and I was just Leslie in a pony body again. Only this time I was about eight meters off of the ground, and moving at about thirty miles an hour. My mind had time to think just three things.
Huh, Aurora works in metric. Was my first thought.
That was incredibly weird and unnerving. I should not do it again. Was my second.
The third thought was my most rational, as I looked down at the ground as thought to myself, I'm pretty high up. This is going to be a really painful landing.
Then panic set in, as I tried to determine how wings worked and why I had ever thought it was a good idea to use them. Aurora! Bad pony! Land before you let me take the wheel! I flapped my wings pretty desperately, and the ground rushed up to meet me. Fortunately instinct kicked in again at the last second, and my wings froze in place in an out stretched and slightly angled upwards position. I stopped losing height at about four feet from the ground, though the speed continued being a problem. I looked up, seeing only concrete, roads, lawns, and sub-urban homes around me. No where really too safe to crash-land, but I was going to have to find somewhere if I wanted to avoid smashing my bones.
Why would a creature so fragile be allowed wings! They're just doomed to death by crash! Terrible design choice really, though I guess wings are much safer to have if you know how to use them.
Okay, you can do this. Wings are simple to use. You understand the basic laws of aerodynamics right? I asked myself, knowing that my knowledge was pretty slim in that area. Air flows around rounded and then tapering off to a point wing and creates lift was about the extent of all I had ever expected I would need to know.
For someone who used to daydream about flying all the time, I really suck at this. I was safe when it came to height, but my speed was the most concerning problem I would ever face.
My hoof scraped the cement, and I got a free hoof-nail clipping. I was about three feet lower than I thought I had been. AHHHHHHHHHH! I mentally yelled, frantically wondering how in the world I was going to get out of this safely.
THINK THINK THINK THINK THINK GOT IT- I could angle my wings, just like I had earlier. Aurora had done it and gained a bunch of height, but it if my wings were angled enough they would act like a wind shield, effectively becoming air-brakes.
I know what air-brakes are! Why didn't I think of this earlier!? My wings flared upwards gently, and I gained height. If I had learned anything from all of this, it was that pegasi can glide surprisingly far at a shockingly low speed. I flared my wings just a bit more, and I began to watch my speed drop dramatically. The pressure of the wind on my wings was pleasant, and I wondered if pegasi had a positive chemical emotional response their brains released when they flew.
Just a bit more and- I must have angled my wings a little too much, because I suddenly found myself losing all the height I had just gained. -And that's that. Brace for impact!
It wasn't a proper crash, seeing as I hit the ground running and was able to easily bring myself to a stop afterwards. I was definitely close to crashing though. My hooves felt hot as trotted in place, having just gone from speeds faster than the human sprint record to standing still. Of course, I hadn't been moving at that speed the whole time, but I was certainly still going faster than the average sprinter when I landed.
I took a deep breath, and exhaled slowly. I could have just died.
I turned around and looked behind me, finding Sam much father behind than I had hoped for. I had at least a minute or so before she caught up, assuming she kept up her sprint. I began trotting towards her, wondering how the conversation would go down.
So yeah. Kinda just had my entire body and mind taken over by Aurora Drift. And then I got the controls back in mid-flight. Worried about my sanity yet? Oh yeah, that would go over well.
Or how about something a little more worrying, like: Hey Sis! So just want to tell you, I'm not entirely Leslie anymore. I kinda just went full pony, and I have no idea when that might happen again.
Or better yet: Yo! So I considered flying up about two thousand meters, but then halfway through I would have realized I don't know how to fly, and so I just nearly died. Sorry. Oh man, if I had actually followed through and flown up to the clouds I would totally be screwed. I wouldn't have had a chance of getting out of that.
There were a million ways that could have gone wrong, thank Celestia it went alright.
I stopped running. Okay, no. I know I'm trying to be okay with being Aurora, but she almost got me killed right there. I think I'm going to go back to being Leslie for a while. He doesn't nearly die very often. So if I could just stop with the ponyisms, it would make me so happy.
Sam caught up with me with a look of awe, and asked, "A little trouble with the landing there Sis?"
"A little trouble. Yeah." I replied, not quite sure how to tell her. What am I supposed to say? How exactly do I tell her what's going on with me? "So. Hole. In the park. We should head back to it."
Looks like I wasn't ready to tell her just yet.
I didn't think I was ready to tell myself. What had just happened was a bit beyond the occasional 'almost thoughts' and things I might say that didn't make sense. That was Aurora going all out, without even the tiniest hint of Leslie hiding anywhere. And the weirdest thing was that I hadn't been unable to control my body, I was simply not myself mentally. Or technically, I was myself. I was more myself than I ever have been yet.
What I had just experienced was being entirely Aurora, instead of just the memory lacking pony I had been pretending to be this whole time. She was happy, she was free, she was confident.
She wasn't much like me. Either I'm simply not ready to be her quite yet, or she's just that radically different from what Leslie was- What I was like. What I'm like right now. I really hoped that I wouldn't have to go through anything like that again anytime soon.
I followed Sam at a much more reasonable pace this time, noticing that despite everything I had just experienced I still wasn't actually breathing hard. I wasn't sweating either, though that wasn't much of a surprise seeing as most animals didn't really sweat in the same way humans did.
The park was at least another two blocks away, so I began to chat. Not asking or telling anything important, just chatting. "So, I suppose I have to ask where you went last night sooner or later."
"Oh, yeah. Sorry about that. I figured the hospitals would be full-"
"Yeah, I thought that too."
"And so I went to go check up on my friends."
"Oh? Like Ramona? Or-"
"Just Ramona." She answered, as we passed by a small rose bush. I gave it a quick sniff as I walked by, and it was shockingly delightful. Pony noses are about twice as powerful as they have any right to be, at that moment I could smell the smoggy but faint pollution of the city, the freshly mowed grass of the houses on the opposite side of the street, and the faintest of all hint of barbecue sauce on Sam's pants. She was about three feet ahead of me, and yet I could smell her pants as if I had my nose pressed to them.
"So how was she?"
"Oh- You know. She turned into a Stallion. Freaking out about her life and her gender, I'm sure you've been there. I've started calling her Romeo."
Woah woah woah. Ramona is a Stallion now? Sam sure was bad at actually telling me things. Ramona was mainly her friend for sure, but I was the one that introduced the two of them. And Sam hadn't told me until just now? Geez Sam, what else are you forgetting to tell me? It's not like I was keeping anything important from her-
Oh. I guess somethings are better left unsaid.
"Oh yeah, definitely been there."
"Not there anymore though? Accepted being little Miss Aurora Draft?"
"Drift" I corrected instantaneously, before my mind actually began to process the question. Had I accepted it? Or was I still struggling to hold onto being Leslie?
"Well, I thought I had, but the part of me that's still Leslie hasn't slipped away entirely yet. It'll be sad when he's gone though."
Oh tell me I did not just say that out loud. If Sam begins to suspect that her brother is- "Ha! Right 'Aurora'. It sure will be." -Joking. She totally thought I was joking. My life is still ongoing, my heart hasn't stopped yet.
How many times could I pass it off as a joke though? And what do you mean 'slipped away entirely'? I thought I was still mostly here! My mind wasn't a rational place anymore. Was I Leslie or Aurora? Did I want Sam to know the truth or not? I probably need professional help.
The missing section of fence that signified the park's entrance loomed before us, and we curved our paths neatly to allow for an optimal angle of entry.
"So really. what kind of hole are we looking for?" I thought for sure Sam would actually tell me now that we were here.
"Oh, you'll know when you see it." I really should have known better. She guided me off the trail, and towards a patch of trees seemingly of no consequence. There was a tiny clearing in the midst of it, and in the middle was-
"Umm, what am I looking at?" I questioned, really wanting to know. What my eyes were reporting to me had to be wrong. It was a bright white light, and very much wrong. It appeared to be floating, and so very wrong. I was strangely drawn to it, and I still couldn't express just how wrong it was.
"Yeah. That's my hole. It's a hole in the universe." Well no wonder it was wrong, holes weren't supposed to be poked in the universe. The universe was supposed to be one solid thing, with no holes. Holes in the universe have never been good.
"And I'm certain that this entire pony fiasco was caused by this thing. Or maybe a bunch of these things. Either way, this thing is trouble." Sam reached out, and began pulling me backwards by the tail. I blinked, realizing I had gotten about six feet closer to it than I wanted to be without even realizing it.
I sat down to ensure I didn't get any closer, and stared at it. Sam pulled a small camera out of her pocket, and joined me on the ground.
Neither of us really had anything to say, so I sat in silence for a while.
"So, hole in the universe," I examined.
"Sure is," Samantha replied, taking a picture and frowning. What is there to say when you're staring at something like this? We could... Talk about how impossible it is.
"Camera got it, so I know it's actually there. And not, you know, a shared hallucination." Sam informed me. Well, I wasn't worried that it was. Sam probably had been though, I couldn't imagine seeing something like this and not wondering if I had lost my mind. Fortunately, my mind was mostly gone already, so I had nothing new to worry about.
I'm going to have to tell her soon. I realized, knowing my time of being alone with the truth about Aurora had to come to an end. I couldn't just keep her bottled away and pretend to be Leslie forever, I- She wanted to be free, and who was I to stop mysel- Her?
Sam needed to know about me- Her. While she still had enough brother left to relate to. I was freaking out about this earlier wasn't I? Back when I still thought I was Leslie and was terrified I was going to lose my memories. Now here I am with all those old memories, but I really shouldn't have been worried about those. I had already accepted being Aurora, it was inevitable so there wasn't any point in protesting. Why was I protesting now? Leslie is finally slipping away, I really am just going to be Aurora now. I'm going to have to accept that. Hadn't I already accepted that? I wasn't sure anymore.
"Sam, I have something kind of serious to tell you." I began, wondering how in the world I was going to pull this off.
"We're staring at a hole in the universe, I expect serious things right now." She claimed, though I knew she really wasn't going to be expecting what I had to tell her.
How did I tell her? This didn't have a possible way of going right. "It's something I've really needed to talk to you about long before this."
"Like, years ago long?"
"Oh, no. Just- Just since last night." How do I start out? Do I just throw it out there? Do I sneak it in and hint at it? My chest was feeling tight, It was probably just anxiety. This was a big thing to tell her after all. "Okay, so you know that pony I've become right?"
"Yes, Aurora Drift. A pretty good flyer as far as I can tell, but then again she's the only pegasus I've seen in real life so far."
"I'll take that as a compliment. That makes me both the best and worst flying horse you've ever seen." Getting side tracked, bring the conversation back. "Anyway, say that hypothetically, I was Leslie, and that I was slowly taking on the personality of Aurora. Like, I wasn't just gaining her memories, but I was actually beginning to think of myself as her."
"Hypothetically right? This isn't already going on?" Well, do I lie or let the cat out of the bag? I could just tell her that it already happened. I didn't, "Right, of course."
"Okay, go on."
"I- What's your reaction once it happens? If it happens."
Sam bit her lip, and shrugged. "Well, if you start being Aurora instead of Leslie, it means I really don't have a brother anymore. Can't say I'd be too happy about that."
Not being too happy is definitely to be expected, I'd be furious if my sister disappeared. I wasn't sure if I had a sister- As Aurora that is. What was Aurora's family like? I'll worry about that later, for now I have to worry about Leslie's family.
"Yeah, that's to be expected. Okay, say that Aurora kept all of Leslie's old memories, so while the individual is named Aurora, she still remembers what it's like to be Leslie. It's just that, now she's-"I paused, unsure of what to say. "-she's..." I was running out of descriptions.
"Okay, so she's still got everything that's left of Leslie in her mind, and now she's recovering all her old memories. So I take it she's lost and confused, and unsure of who she is anymore."
"I- yeah, that sounds about right. Add on a feeling of guilt for having replaced Leslie, and we've got an Aurora."
Sam stood up, pulling me into a close hug. Wait what? "I don't care what you think your name is, or even what gender you are. You're my sibling, and you don't have to be lost or confused. I'm right here for you."
I blinked. I wasn't quite expecting a positive reaction, I had my mind set on angry shouting, maybe even a few tears. But Sam doing this? I wrapped my hooves around her back, and pulled her closer. "Sis- I was- I just- This is just hypothetical right?"
She giggled, "Of course not. I know exactly what's going on here. I know the truth.
She knew the truth, that was a bit surprising. Maybe she had known it for quite a while. "How did you-"
"I figured it out last night. Or at least, that's part of what helped me figure it out. I told you that you were worthy of the name Aurora, and you looked disappointed,"
I had? I didn't even know. When she had told me that last night I wasn't exactly paying attention to my facial expressions. She continued, "It was like you were upset, and I thought it was because you were hoping for a better name at first. But now it's pretty clear. You were disappointed because you felt you didn't need to do anything to be worthy of your own name."
I was at a bit of a loss. "I- I did? I think you might be reading into this a bit too far Sis."
She smiled, "Maybe, but I told you I wanted to be a psych major, right? Reading too far into things is what I wanted to do!" That- Isn't what psychology is about, but okay...
Sam set me back down on the ground, and I looked to my right. "Uh, Sam?" She followed my gaze, and jumped in surprise. We had somehow moved to within inches of the hole without even realizing it. My feather trailed right along the edge of it, and I froze in shock.
It was definitely a source of pure magic, I could feel the warmth and life pouring out of it. Or was it pouring out? It felt to me more like it was pouring in. Either way, the magic in this area was extremely turbulent. I hadn't thought to close my eyes and see the flows of magic until now, but it was seeming like a good idea.
I began to close my eyes, and noticed that my ears weren't working anymore. My eyes shot open again. I looked at Sam, who was asking something with a bit of panic in her eyes, but I couldn't quite hear it. The sounds of the park, the bird whistles and tree branches quivering in the wind were gone, all I heard was the pounding of my heart.
I looked back at the hole, and noticed something pink and red trailing into it, flapping gently. My stupid tail, I really had to get that thing cut. I tried to take a step away, but my hooves froze solid.
My tail was trapped, and I wasn't going anywhere.
Well, actually I was going somewhere. The hole was beginning to pull me in. Sam reached out towards me, gripping my hoof desperately. I finally heard her voice, which was now filled with determination. "I am not losing both my Sister and my Brother in the same day!"
The hole did not agree, seeing as I suddenly lurched backwards, my entire lower body feeling warm and magical. I looked down, and noticed my body was glowing the same white colour as the hole. I couldn't feel my hooves anymore.
I lurched backwards again, and Sam frowned. "This can't be it. I had a good life going, I don't want to-" I started saying, before I lurched backwards once more, pulling Sam head over heels and straight into the void with me. "Sorry!" was my last word.