Shaking his head to clear away some of the grey that had been forming around his mind, Spike brought the ship in to land on the deck of the battleship. Solaris had already landed, but he couldn’t see her anywhere on the flight deck, meaning that she had either gone to the bridge or maybe the mess hall. Either way, it wouldn’t be too hard to find her.
Flipping a switch, Spike shut the engines off and opened the cockpit, before hauling himself out, dropping down to the cool metal floor and shivering slightly. Pushing past it, Spike began to make his way towards the blast door leading to the rest of the ship, moving in to a long corridor and making his way towards the bridge. Thank Celestia that all of these ships were stet out the same, or he would probably have got himself hopelessly lost.
Reaching the bridge, Spike found it bustling with movement, but managed to catch sight of Solaris, who was engrossed in conversation with someone he didn’t know. Deciding that he didn’t need to interrupt her, Spike moved back into the corridor and leant against the wall, before deciding he might as well sit down, and sliding down it, resting his head against it and closing his eyes.
He didn’t know why, but he was completely spent, all his energy having gone on the battle, and now that the adrenaline had worn off, the effects were catching up with him, as were his actions in the past hour.
There were of course the deaths he caused directly, not to mention the thousands he had killed indirectly when he had shut off the stations defences, and they made him feel physically sick, but they weren’t what was really occupying his mind. No, what got that honour was what had happened with Herank on board the Eagle.
When he had seen someone threatening Tarhal with a weapon, and could have actually killed him if they had been so inclined, it was like something had just snapped. At the time, the thought of killing someone again was not at the front of his mind, instead, all he had wanted was cold hard revenge. He shuddered to think that if Herank had ended up killing Tarhal, there wouldn’t have been anyone to stop him, and he would have gone a lot further than simply cutting her arm off.
Closing his eyes, Spike tried to empty his mind completely, focusing simply on meditating upon the force. Instead, he sensed a presence in front of him, and opened his eyes to see Solaris looking down at him, her face unreadable.
“Master.” Spike said, getting back to his feet.
“Walk with me, we need to talk to the council and inform them of what happened, and you need to tell me what happened on the ship.” She said, setting off at a slow pace down the corridor.
“Fine.” Spike nodded. “Herank had managed to get herself up and had her manacles around Tarhal’s neck. I tried to get them apart, but all it did was push Tarhal over and leave Herank free. She ran at me, and I defended myself.” Spike lied.
“Is that really what happened?” Solaris asked, looking down at Spike.
“It is.” Spike nodded, tiny beads of sweat forming on the back of his neck.
Luckily, it seemed that Solaris didn’t notice, or else was satisfied with the answer, because for the rest of the journey to the holo-communicator, she did not say a word, blanking the questions that Spike asked her, until he too lapsed into an uneasy silence.
Finally, after what seemed like an eternity of not talking, they reached a small door and moved into the room, walking over to the circular holo-communicator that dominated the small space. Inputting the relevant code string, Solaris moved back to Spikes side and waited. They did not have to wait long.
As had happened the last time they had called the council, the flat surfaced rippled, before condensing into an image of the council chamber.
“Master Solaris. Padawan Spike.” Garton said, nodding at the pair. “I assume your mission was a success?”
“It was.” Solaris nodded. “Following a lead gained from the black box date from a crashed ship at Jax, we deduced the system that the ship had originated from, and travelled there after making plans with the Republic Fireshot Fleet. After gaining entry to the planetary defence station, Spike managed to begin a virus upload to the fire control centre, while Master Norik, Padawan Tarhal and I managed to apprehend Lady Kalia again and take her back to our ship. Unfortunately, she managed to escape, and was only subdued again after she attacked Spike and had her arm cut off. Leaving, we signalled the Fireshot Fleet, dropped off Lady Kalia and won the battle. The space station is destroyed, but landing in the planet proper would require a much large force, and the Republic are not willing to commit such a force. As such, we are returning to Fireshot station.” She said, summarising the events of the mission.
“That is all well and good in accordance to Master Norik’s statement.” Garton nodded. “But there is one thing. Did you allow Spike to pose as a slave to get on board?”
“So he told you did he?” Solaris muttered. “Yes, I did allow Spike to pose as a slave after deliberating any other plan and finding none. I believed Master Norik was of the same opinion that it was necessary.”
“He was.” Garton replied. “In fact, he praised the plan as working perfectly, and being executed as if it had been rehearsed. We, the council, however, do not support this type of action.”
“Of course you don’t.” Solaris groaned.
“Suppose something had gone wrong.” Garton continued, not hearing Solaris. “What would you have done if Spike had not been able to free himself, or perhaps he had been taken to the planet? Maybe he would have been tortured,” Spike coughed unsubtly at this, but Garton continued, “or if Herank had gone ahead with her plan to cut his tongue out? Did you think of…”
“Yes.” Solaris cut in. “I thought of everything that could happen and everything that could go wrong. You know that I wouldn’t let something like that get away from me, but we had no choice if we wanted to take her alive. If we had simply attacked the station, we would have lost a battleship, and she would have slipped out of the system anyway. We had to act.”
For a long time, neither side said anything as they processed what Solaris had said, before Garton finally broke the silence.
“This council finds your actions acceptable, if not amicable. Transfer Herank to Master Norik for transport to the temple. Session dismissed.”
As soon as he had finished speaking, the communicator cut out, leaving Spike and Solaris alone.
“Ass.” She muttered, before turning to Spike. “Now, what’s bothering you?”
“What?” Spike asked in confusion.
“Something is bothering you, even without the force I could tell that. Now, what is it?” She asked, smiling reassuringly.
“I…killed people.” Spike said after a moment’s hesitation. “And I…” He trailed off.
“Yes, sometimes we must kill, it is distasteful, but it must be done.” Solaris said smoothly.
“But they’re…” Spike began.
“Dead? It’s ok, don’t be afraid to say it. Dead, the dead, death, the fact isn’t going to go away if we avoid it, and if we do avoid it, it will only get bigger than it really is. You can’t live without death Spike, and you can’t die without life. Killing is not the answer for everything, but sometimes it is the only way, and at moments like that, a Jedi must accept their role to play.” Solaris said kindly.
“How can you be so calm about this?” Spike asked in amazement. “Aren’t Jedi supposed to uphold the peace?”
“Of course, but how do you think we often do that?” Solaris asked. “Spike, the Jedi are warriors, our weapons are more advanced than anyone else, our training is more extensive, and we control more powers than anyone else. We are warriors. Especially me.”
“You?” Spike asked in confusion.
“Yes.” Solaris nodded. “Why do you think I stay on Fireshot station? The Jedi are warriors, yet some of us, me included, see ourselves as soldiers as well.”
“So you fight all the time?” Spike asked.
“When I was alone, the Jedi called me, or one of the others like me, when they wanted to keep things quiet. I’m something of a dirty secret of the Jedi. Now you’re here though, I’m stopping that until you can make the decision on your own. The council didn’t like me taking you on, something along the lines of a bad influence, but you’re going to make your own choices Spike, if I can teach you one thing, it’s that. Always be who you are, not who someone else wants you to be.”
Unsure of what to say, Spike watched in silence as Solaris disappeared out of the corridor, before running after her. Before he could reach her however, she turned back around to face him, stopping him in his tracks.
“Go to the medical ward, find Herank and take her Norik and Tarhal in the hanger, then come find me, I’ll be on the bridge.” She ordered, before turning around and leaving again.
Nodding, Spike turned on his heels at set off down the corridor in the opposite direction from his master, heading towards the medical ward.
***
“My people will hunt you down to find me, and then I’ll show you what pain is.” Herank growled, straining against the cuffs around her leg and her one remaining arm.
“If you say so.” A disinterested medic said, checking on a clipboard, before walking off, looking over to the door as it slid open, allowing a strange upright lizard creature to walk in.
“I’m sorry, but you can’t be in here.” The medic said, holding his hands up to the lizard creature. “It’s authorised personal only.”
“Oh, he’s authorised.” Herank growled, looking up at the lizard. “Isn’t that right, Padawan Spike?”
“You’re a Jedi?” The medic asked, his eyes falling towards his waist and setting on his Lightsaber. “I’m sorry for trying to stop you.” Quickly, the medic backed away, walking down the ward to check on another patient.
“Come to see the cripple that you made?” Herank asked, lying back down as Spike walked over. “Or have you come to finish me off?”
“Actually, I came on orders, I don’t care what you think of me and what I did, but you owe one of the ones I’m passing you over to your life, cause if he hadn’t stopped me, they’d be transporting a corpse. Now,” Spike said, waving his hand at the key and bringing it over, unlocking the cuffs and pulling her out of the bed, “try and run, and you may lose a leg as well.”
“You know,” she said as she began to walk down the corridor, Spike following closely behind her, his Lightsaber hilt in his hand, “you’re nothing like any Jedi I’ve seen before.”
“I’m not any Jedi you’ve seen before, that’s why.” Spike said simply, reaching the door to the hanger and pushing Herank inside.
“Spike?” Tarhal called, walking over beside Norik.
“Got a prisoner for you two.” Spike said, pushing Herank again.
“Easy now Spike, she’s a prisoner, we can’t treat her badly.” Norik said, grabbing Herank.
“You going to be more observant this time Wookie?” Herank smiled, looking at Tarhal.
Tarhal scowled at her, but didn’t respond to her, instead turning to Norik.
“I’ll get the Eagle started. Be ready in about a minute.” He said tersely, before turning around and walking up the ramp to the ship, disappearing from sight.
“Now my Wookie’s a little rusty, but he doesn’t seem happy about this Dick, or is that Norik, I get confused.” Herank laughed.
“You know, when it comes to mind games, the Jedi are usually the ones playing them.” Norik said simply. “Plus the fact that I’m not a Padawan, you won’t be able to just wind me up like they can. Ah, the failings of youth.”
“Still here master.” Spike smirked, before scowling at Herank. “Don’t let her escape this time.”
“Oh don’t worry Spike, she’ll be safe.” Norik nodded.
“Great, last time I had Jedi ‘protecting’ me I had two arms.” She scowled, before Norik hauled her away towards the ship.
“Good luck out here Spike, this isn’t training anymore.” Norik called, before the door to his ship slid closed, and he disappeared from sight.
Turning around, Spike walked back towards the door of the hanger, hearing the ship behind him take off, and feeling the warm rush of air from its engines on his back, it felt odd, and seemed to last longer than it should have done, but before he could really think about it, it had disappeared, and Spike was back in the corridor and well on his way to the bridge.
***
“Master.” Spike called out as he entered the bridge, pushing his way through the crew and moving over to Solaris.
“Spike.” She nodded, turning to face him. “Did Herank give you any trouble?”
“She’s a little bitter.” Spike said with a slight smile.
“Yeah, what can you do? Someone cut off her arm.” She smirked back, before walking past him. “Come on, fleets about to jump, they’ve given us a window to leave before they go to hyperspace.”
“Aren’t we going back to Fireshot?” Spike asked in confusion.
“Nope, we’ve got somewhere else to be, you and I.” She smiled.
“Mind telling me where that is master?” He asked. “And could you not have met me in the hanger, I literally just came from there.”
“Where would be the fun in that?” She asked as they entered the hanger bay again, before walking towards their fighters.
“Will you tell me before we have to jump, or do I have to guess that as well?” Spike asked, reaching for his helmet and flight suit.
“I’ll tell you.” She nodded, looking over to Spike. “Oh, you can leave the suit this time. I think you can handle the flight without it.”
“You just made my day master.” Spike smiled, dropping the suit to the floor, before climbing into his fighter. “Will you tell me where we’re going now?”
“Illum.”
***
“Why do I not get any sort of coat?” Spike shivered, looking over to his master, who was wearing a long fur-lined coat over her robe, the hood pulled up over her head.
“You’ve got fire in your belly Spike. Literally in your case.” Solaris smiled. “You said you didn’t wear one on your first expedition, so you don’t need one now. Plus, the more important fact that you didn’t pack one.”
“Last time I was in the caves and out of the wind.” Spike said through chattering teeth.
“Don’t worry Spike, you can survive this, the force will keep you alive.” Solaris reassured him. “Plus, I’m going to turn the engines of my ship on, should keep you warm.”
“If you say so.” Spike nodded.
“I do. Now, get out your crystal please.” She said, before reaching into a bag that she had brought along with her, pulling out a part and showing it to Spike. “Recognise this?”
“That’s a Lightsaber hilt.” Spike noted, pulling out the crystal he had stored in the pouch on his belt.
“Not just any Lightsaber hilt though is it?” She asked, throwing the empty part over to him.
“No, it’s got the other handle on.” Spike smiled, looking up to Solaris with a smile. “How did you get this?”
“I remembered your fight with Asho in the tournament, your use of two weapons.” She said matter-of-factly. “You seemed to take to it well, so I had this forged for you. I just had to wait till the right time came along.”
“Thank you master.” Spike smiled.
“It’s fine my Padawan. Now, you know how to activate the crystal. It should be quicker this time, then we can build it and we can get off this frost ball.
Nodding, Spike sat down in the snow, shivering slightly, before he crossed his legs and concentrated on the crystal, raising it to his eye level and opening his mind to the force.
***
“Moonstone?” Spike called out as he looked over the black emptiness that he recognised as his meditating mind.
“My my my. You have improved.” Came the familiar voice, and Spike turned to see the familiar form of the not-Twilight look alike. “Already crafting a second blade?”
“Solaris believes it best.” Spike nodded.
“And what do you believe Spike?” Moonstone asked, sitting down next to him.
“I…I think that if I follow her that I’ll become like her. Desensitised that is. She seems to be so used to death, that it’s become as natural to her as life. Don’t get me wrong, she’s amazing as a master, she’s funny, almost as immature as me, and fair, but it’s just…” Spike trailed off slowly, failing to think of the proper way to describe her.
“And this frightens you.” Moonstone nodded knowingly.
“Frightens me? Amazes me that she can keep a positive outlook on life? I don’t know.” Spike admitted.
“That’s something you’ll have to decide on your own Spike, this is not decision I will be able to make for you.” Moonstone pointed out.
“I know, it’s just good find a place to get things out of your mind sometimes. Even if that place is…inside your mind.” Spike said slowly, realising the paradoxical statement he had made and smirking.
“If it helps.” Moonstone said simply.
“It does, it really does.” Spike nodded, before focusing on the crystal properly once more. It had already started to take on a very faint colour by now, but in the half light, Spike could make out what it was.
Focusing harder, Spike poured himself into it once again, finishing the process.
***
“Twelve hours and fifty two minutes in total. Three hours and six minutes since I turned the engines of the Cyclone on.” Solaris said, looking down at a datapad, before looking up at Spike. “Not bad Spike, not bad at all.”
“Thanks.” Spike smiled, showing her the crystal. It seemed to be glowing, but didn’t actually seem to be emitting a colour.
“Huh, I wonder.” Solaris mused as she looked closely at the crystal, before handing Spike the parts she had brought with her. “I believe you know what to do with these, and this time you won’t need spend days heating them to get them strong.”
“I’m glad. It was bloody hot in the furnace. Worked up a bit of a sweat.” Spike said with a slight grin, taking the parts from Solaris.
Working quickly, Spike inserted the crystal into the matrix, making sure it was in the right way, before attaching it to the power source and sliding it inside the casing. Even working quickly and knowing what he was doing from prior experience, it still took him over an hour, but Solaris didn’t seem to mind. While he worked, she simply sat there, her gloved encased hands behind her resting in the snow, and a look of tranquil calm spread over her face as the hot air from her fighters engines washed around her. Spike wondered if this was her preferred meditation stance, but decided it would be best to keep working on his weapon and get finished, so they could get out of the cold all together.
Finally, he stood up, holding the finished hilt in his hand with a look of triumph on his face. Instantly, Solaris was on her feet, looking pleased with him finally finishing.
“Done?” She asked, drawing a nod from Spike. “Good. There is one thing I forgot though, your old saber has small stones on the handle doesn’t it?”
“Yep. A purple starburst, Twilights cutie mark.” He smiled.
“Ah, yeah, there lies the problem.” She smiled weakly. “See, I got some gems so you could do it on this one, but…” She trailed off as she showed him some small blue gems. “I couldn't remember the colour.”
“It’s fine.” Spike smiled. “I can sort that out later.”
“Great.” Solaris nodded. “Well, what are you waiting for? Fire her up.”
Grinning, Spike grasped the Lightsaber by the secondary handle and thumbed the activator. For a moment, nothing happened, before suddenly the beam burst into life, solidifying into a pure white blade. Spike stared at the weapon, enthralled by the colour. He had only seen something this perfect once before.
“Master?” He asked, tearing his eyes away from the blade. “Can I have those gems after all?”
***
Spike checked over his fighter from the outside, scraping thin layers of ice off the engines and cockpit. At his side, already attached to his belt was his second Lightsaber, three tiny blue gems forming the cutie mark of one special pony. Smiling, Spike grabbed the two Lightsabers, placing them beside each other and admiring the cutie marks together.
He wasn’t alone out here, not any more.