//------------------------------// // Chapter Five // Story: To Be A Princess // by WellKPony //------------------------------// Chapter Five Twilight could hear tentative hoofsteps behind her own as she cantered briskly down the stairs of her tower. In her mind’s eye, the contrasting volumes of the two sets of clops conjured up the image of a mouse chasing a cat. The stallion on Twilight’s tail seemed determined to keep up with her yet too frightened to pass, lest she catch sight of him and snap again. She felt a certain satisfaction and power in knowing she was responsible for him behaving like this. She smiled malevolently to herself as she continued her descent of the stairs. It served him right. He had been hurrying and harrying her all day. His constant picking and criticism had left her feeling very small indeed. Well, now it was his turn. He could feel small. He could feel scared. He could feel stupid. Twilight lifted her head, feeling triumphant. At last, somepony could feel just a fraction of what she had felt for the weeks and weeks leading up to today. It was only fair. Twilight sped up slightly, feeling very assured; very confident; very pleased with herself. It was good to know that somepony else could experience what she had. It was something of a relief. Just as this feeling began to settle in, Twilight felt something tugging at her left front hoof and she was thrown off balance. In her haste, she had caught her hoof in a fold on her dress. She tried to frantically to find something solid to grab a hold of but it was already far too late. Her nose had been so high in the air as she had cantered proudly that she had no time to react and she began cascading head over hoof down the remaining steps. She landed at the bottom with a thud and a small whimper before being struck on the back of the head by her crown which had obviously come off as she tumbled. Her dress lay splayed out around her and a small clang echoed around the tower as the Element fell to the floor. There was a few seconds of silence which seemed to taunt her for being so careless. This was followed by the sound of hooves galloping down the stairs towards her. A frightened voice cried out to her. “Princess?! Are you alright?!” The white stallion bounded in to view. His eyes were filled with concern as he approached her, extending a hoof to help her stand. Twilight’s face burned with embarrassment. She looked at the stallion for a few moments before turning her head towards the ground. She chose to remain lying where she was not out of anger, nor spite, nor even pride. She refused the proffered hoof out of shame. “Yes,” she said quietly to the her own hooves, tears welling up in her eyes. “Yes, I’m fine. Just leave me alone. I’ll catch up to you in a moment. Please, just leave me alone.” She watched the stallions hooves as he faltered. He stepped towards her briefly seemingly unsure of what he should do. After a couple of seconds, though, he had obviously decided that he had better heed Twilight’s words and his white legs left her sight and his hoofsteps receded down the corridor which led towards the throne room where the practice was to take place. Twilight snatched at the material of her dress, pulling it towards herself and sat up, allowing its folds to pool around her forelegs. She felt almost as bad at that moment as she had when Shining Armour had uninvited her to his wedding. How could she have allowed herself to get so angry? How could she have felt any sort of pleasure in making somepony feel so horrible about themselves? What kind of pony did that? What kind of princess did that? She lifted her hooves up to her face, almost expecting to see the claws of a monster. She wasn't herself. This wasn't her. She would fix this. Suddenly, finding Fluttershy became the most important thing in the world. Picking herself up off the ground, Twilight hurried into the corridor. Part of her hoped that she might not be too late to see where she had run off to – a silly notion given how many minutes had passed since the pegasus’ departure. There was no sign of her, nor any lingering echo of her tearful flight. Just the austere silence of the castles corridors, devoid of life. Twilight felt panicked and terribly alone. She didn't know what she should say. She didn't know what she should do. All she knew was that she had to find Fluttershy and attempt to make things right. Whether what had happened had been the pegasus' fault or not, she was a friend and she deserved her friends to be there for her. A friend who kisses you completely out of the blue? On the eve of the biggest day of your life? With no consideration for how it might make you feel? Or whether you wanted her to or not? What kind of friend does a thing like that? These thoughts made Twilight shudder. She pushed them from her mind. They weren't important. Now was not the time to be questioning Fluttershy's character. She had, after all, never been anything but kind and helpful with Twilight. She was anything but inconsiderate. She must have had her reasons for doing what she did, even if they didn't make any sense. Twilight shook herself mentally and began trying to fathom out where Fluttershy might go under these circumstances. Surely she wouldn't go straight to the hall. Would she? She would want to be alone, like Twilight. She wouldn't want anypony asking her any uncomfortable questions. She would go to her room. Twilight took off in that direction hoping she was right. When she arrived, she found the door closed. There was no sound coming from within, but that didn't mean anything. Fluttershy was a very quiet pony after all. Twilight hesitated briefly, composing herself before pushing the door open. The lights were out and the room was still. Her shoulders slumped. She had been so sure that this was where Fluttershy would go. Now she was at a complete loss. She walked over to a large window which overlooked the castle gardens. That was a possibility. She would like to be around the animals. But it was already dark. Perhaps not. There were too many solitary places in the castle. There was the library, any of the studies, her bedroom, the other ponies' bedrooms, the gardens. The dining room would probably be empty by now. In fact there were so many places to look that she couldn't do it alone. If she wasn't in the throne room with everypony else maybe Twilight could persuade the others to help her search, though that might lead to some awkward questions. Still, it was the only plan she had so she decided to go with it. Time seemed to speed up in an attempt to spite her for her apprehension. She dreaded her arrival. What would everypony think if she told them what had happened? What would her friends say? What would Celestia say? The doors loomed large in front of her as she imagined what lay in wait beyond their imposing forms. She approached one of them and pushed it open with her magic, taking a deep breath as she backed cautiously into the room. She closed the door behind her and swallowed a large ball of nerves that had worked its way into her throat. “She’s here!” Pinkie’s excited voice carried over the general hubbub. Twilight turned around in alarm, stirred by the sudden ruckus. She hadn’t noticed quite how quiet the corridors had been until that moment. As soon as she turned around, she was surrounded by her friends, all of whom greeted her as though they hadn’t seen her in weeks despite the fact that they had seen her only a short while ago. “We thought you had gotten lost. What took you?” Rainbow laughed. “I… um… I… I fell down the stairs and it jarred me a little,” Twilight answered, looking away from Rainbow and blushing. “Oh my. Is everything okay? We knew there must have been something. Fluttershy said that you were fixing your shoes when she left, but that was nearly twenty-five minutes ago!” Rarity looked Twilight up and down as she spoke. “Fluttershy’s here?” Twilight asked with a little more urgency than she ought to have. Her muscles stiffened and her eyes darted around the semicircle of ponies. Pinkie Pie was bouncing on the spot, her dress billowing out around her with every descent. Rainbow was standing with her front legs crossed, watching Pinkie and Applejack was laughing at Rarity, who had begun walking around Twilight to checking her dress for tears and scuffs. There was no hint of yellow. No teal eyes poking out from behind somepony's back. “Well, of course she’s here, darlin'. In fact she's right over there talking to the Princess.” Applejack pointed towards the front of the hall. “Has been ever since she got here.” Twilight craned her neck to see over the gathered ponies; her eagerness to see the other mare consumed her. Sure enough, Fluttershy stood just a few yards away. Ostensibly, she was locked in a deep conversation with Princess Celestia but something about her manner told Twilight that all was not as it seemed. For one thing, she hadn't greeted Twilight when she had entered the room. In fact, it wasn't entirely clear if she even realised that Twilight had arrived. For another, she conversed with the type of single-minded determination designed to create the illusion of preoccupation. Her ruse was working a little too well, perhaps. Twilight got the distinct impression that, should the walls have crumbled at that very moment, Fluttershy would have carried on regardless. "They look–" Twilight paused, continuing to watch the two ponies with interest while carefully choosing her next words. "Very involved. Any idea what they're talking about?" Applejack looked over her shoulder, then back at Twilight. "Nope. You wanna find out?" "No!" Twilight yelped, her eyes growing wide. "I mean, well, it looks a little private, don't you think? I wouldn't want to interrupt them." Applejack raised her eyebrows and shrugged her shoulders. "If you say so." "It looks like we got lucky. Not so much as a pulled thread," Rarity said popping up in front of Twilight. "Interrupt whom?" She turned to face Twilight, who immediately forced herself to look away from Fluttershy and Celestia, turning her gaze upon Luna instead. Rarity put her head next to Twilight’s in an attempt to ascertain where she had been looking. A moment later, she withdrew her head. “Oh, I see,” she intoned. Rarity could be a very subtle pony, when she wasn’t concerned with some huge catastrophe or working herself in to a frenzy over an unfilled order. She often noticed subtle changes in a pony’s mood and had subtle ways of eliciting information about said changes. She understood ponies in a way that Twilight couldn’t. And right now the pony Twilight couldn't understand was Rarity herself. “What? What do you see?” Twilight asked. A note of incredulity framed her question. There was no way Rarity could see anything. Twilight fixed her with a gaze that could almost be described as a glare and raised her eyebrow challengingly. Rarity blinked, her eyes vacant, staring into the middle distance. She didn’t reply. She didn’t even acknowledge the question. She betrayed nothing about what she might be thinking. “What?” Twilight insisted, growing increasingly worried. “Yeah, what?!” Pinkie squeaked loudly, bouncing in between Rarity and the distance. Rarity shook her head vigorously, the pupils of her eyes moving in time with Pinkie’s bouncing. Twilight looked nervously towards Fluttershy, fearing that she might be disturbed by this sudden, loud noise and work out what he was being spoken about. It was in that instant that their eyes met. It was only a short moment, but it felt like an eternity. The moment she noticed that Twilight was looking back, Fluttershy dropped her head and hid behind her fringe. Twilight felt her heart wrench. She didn’t want this to be awkward. It was already bad enough that one of her best friends felt too uncomfortable to talk to her. Put on the spot and unsure of what to do, she raised her hoof and gave a small, hesitant wave. Fluttershy blushed and waved back, blowing her fringe out of her eye and smiling sheepishly. Their gaze lingered for a few more moments before Fluttershy turned back to Celestia. Twilight continued to watch her for a second or two, wishing she would look back. She didn’t. When Twilight eventually turned away, she saw a look being shared between Applejack and Rarity. They both had broad smirks which they attempted to hide the moment they noticed Twilight looking. Twilight shook her head at them, her brow furrowed. “Don’t you worry, Twilight. I’m sure she’ll come around,” Applejack said, sincerely. Rarity nudged her roughly, narrowing her eyes and pursing her lips. Applejack nudged her back and furrowed her brow. “What? You said—” Rarity cleared her throat loudly. “Yes, Applejack. I remember what I said. There’s no need to be so forward about it.” Twilight’s eyes bulged as she realised what they were talking about. A noise somewhere between a squeal and cough escaped her throat. “What? No, wait. She… I—” “Okay, ponies! Now that we’re all here, let’s get this show on the road. And might I add how fabulous you all look.” The organiser pony walked into the middle of the room, levitating a clipboard in front of him. The room descended into silence and Twilight’s protest was cut short. “Places, everypony!” A host of dignitaries made their way to the front row of seats. Musicians began tuning their instruments. The vocalists started singing exercises and there was a flurry of movement, during which Twilight was swept towards the back of the hall. The next time she was able to focus her eyes on anything, Twilight attempted to find Rarity amongst the crowd. When she did, she saw that the unicorn was walking along next to Fluttershy, whispering something in the pegasus’ ear. Twilight’s stomach turned. If Rarity was telling Fluttershy what she thought she was telling her… she shuddered. This couldn’t possibly get any worse. * * * * * Twilight lay flat on her back with her wings and limbs splayed out around her, still trying to work out whether or not this was a comfortable position. The room was bathed in moonlight and the only sound was the distinctive drone a baby dragon humming in his sleep. Twilight thought about the evening’s events as she stared at the ceiling. As it turned out, things hadn’t gone quite as badly as she had imagined. The rehearsal itself had gone swimmingly. More so, in fact, than anypony could possibly have hoped. Nopony had been reprimanded for anything. There had been a few do-overs for certain part – the actual crowning being one of them – but the vast majority of it had progressed exactly as it would the next morning. The success of the run-through had led to Twilight’s apprehension giving way to a mildly unwelcome sense of anticipation. Well, perhaps not anticipation so much as an eagerness to get it all over and done with which, she supposed, was much the same when it came down to it. As much as she still had her doubts about life after the coronation, the event itself no longer felt like one big opportunity to make a fool of herself. It now felt like a duty; an event being held solely for the purpose of announcing something that everypony already knew; the kind of frivolous tradition that these occasions always seemed to demand. For that reason, it had begun to feel rather ridiculous and singularly unintimidating. The only hurdle she still had to overcome in her mind was the thought of giving a speech to the thousands of ponies who had come to Canterlot, probably for the sole purpose of hearing her give that speech. She still felt reassured by the presence of her friends, but the main thing that had given her the confidence to stand up and deliver the address felt a little diminished. Fluttershy hadn’t revoked her promise to stand in for Twilight should she falter during her speech. However, she hadn’t reaffirmed it either. Twilight doubted whether she would feel quite as kind after what had happened between them and with that doubt, all of her doubts came flooding back. It wasn’t that she thought that Fluttershy wouldn’t still consider her a friend. It wasn’t that she didn’t consider Fluttershy a friend. It was just that she knew that she felt a little awkward around the her now. Even during the swift goodnight she had exchanged with her five pony friends, she hadn’t been able to look the pegasus in the eye. What if Fluttershy felt the same? Would she still feel like backing Twilight up? Would she still feel like doing something which terrified her to save her friend’s blushes? No. She would probably feel as though she had put herself through enough on Twilight’s account. Twilight twisted around again, coiling the bed sheets around her having finally found a position that, while not comfortable, was also not uncomfortable. She lay there, trying to push these thoughts from her mind, instead focusing on her breath in an attempt to relax. After all, she had a big day ahead of her.