//------------------------------// // Ch. 7 - Give and Take // Story: Better Than Best // by Signas //------------------------------// "...And thus ends the heartwarming tale of Lightning Dust's quest for self-enlightenment." I took a sip of Pony Joe's Joetastic coffee which, to my dismay, had cooled during my riveting story. "Well, up to this point, anyhow." "Huh." Joe's reaction didn't involve the tears of joy I was expecting. "I was a little worried when you didn't come in for a couple days, but I guess you've been keepin' yourself busy. Gotta ask, though... what exactly does a Wonderbolts show or Miss Rarity's butt have to do with breakin' down walls? If ya don't mind me asking, of course." "Uh, they have everything to do with breaking down walls." I gestured to the wobbly mare sitting on the bench to my left. "See, this goofball is going to get me in the preshow, where all of Equestria will witness my unmatched coaching ability. Isn't that right, Fritter?" My friendly shoulder punch nearly sent Apple Fritter on the floor, possibly due to her intoxication or my rippling muscles. "Well shucks, Dusty, I was kinda expectin' somethin' else when ya promised to have a drink with me," she said, gazing rather disappointingly at her mug of delicious liquid fire. "I don't mind settin' up yer game for ya, but I may just have to add it to your tab." "Whoa now, just because it isn't alcohol doesn't mean it isn't a drink." How anypony could be disappointed with Joe's coffee was well beyond my cognitive reasoning. It could even be considered a mental illness. "Coffee's good for you. It wakes you up and won't obliterate your liver." Just talking about coffee made me thirsty, so I downed the rest of my cup with gusto. "Besides, I told Applejack I wouldn't get drunk with you, and I always keep my promises." "Aw, geez. Here we go." I couldn't tell if Fritter's exaggerated eye roll was from genuine exasperation or just her being wacky. "Applejerk just doesn't know how to have fun. Always goin' on about 'takin' care of yourself' and 'not sleepin' around' and such..." "She has a point, though." "Doesn't mean she's gotta treat me like a filly 'bout it. She's always been like that, even when we were foals." Suddenly, I felt a loose hoof making circles on my lower back, dangerously close to forbidden territory. "You know, I served Celestia her breakfast once and she said I was fine the way I am." "I think it's a well known fact that Princess Celestia is one of the nicest ponies on the planet." "Okay, but you're pretty nice to me, too. Treatin' me like a real mare and everythin'..." The weirdo started leaning closer, which I prayed was due to a lack of balance. "Just wish you'd let me do the same." "Uh, right." Back rubs are fine and dandy, but this was just starting to get creepy. "A-Anyway, that's where things stand, Joe. I've got a week to prepare those guys for the flight of their lives, and once that's over, Spitfire is going to realize what a horrible mistake she made, lose some sleep over it, and then come begging me for forgiveness." Joe stared blankly for a moment before responding. "Dusty, I... I dunno, I think maybe you're goin' about this the wrong way. Again." "Hold on, are you saying this isn't the greatest plan in the history of equine kind? I'm fairly certain well-educated scholars would disagree with that claim." "What I'm sayin' is, you went out lookin' for what you were missin' to be 'perfect'. Thinkin' about it, you may be on the right track, but it could be... I dunno, worded a little better, I guess." "Worded a little better?" I cocked an eyebrow in confusion, while attempting to dislodge the touchy-feely mare attached to me. "You aren't making any sense, Joe. I worded it perfectly. I said that I'm pretty much already perfect, and I just need to show that I'm capable of spreading my radicalness to other ponies. I'm not sure how I could make it any more clear than that, guy." "I don't think that's necessarily the problem though." Joe gently removed Fritter from my side as he continued his no-doubt inane explanation. "You want to help other ponies get better. That's good, and awful generous of you. But your story makes it sound like you dragged a couple of ponies into your plan to suit your own needs. See, that ain't good." I sighed; sometimes, I wondered if the world was trying to confuse me on purpose to give everypony else some kind of advantage or something. "It is good for them because it will make them better." "Do they want to get better?" "Of course. They just don't know it yet." "Relationships are give and take, Lightning," Joe stated, taking my empty mug away for cleaning. "You gotta be willing to give your friends what they want sometimes if you're gonna expect them to give you what you want. You dragged this broad here for a drink so she'd set up a show for you, but while I certainly appreciate the patronage, it ain't what she was hopin' for, and I get the feelin' you knew that. You gettin' me?" Fritter slapped my back playfully, nearly flooring herself in the process. "See Dusty, this guy gets it!" "Yeah yeah, I'm the bad pony here." "I ain't sayin' you're a bad pony, Dusty." Joe shot me a reassuring grin which, while appreciated, didn't have the intended effect. "You just gotta remember that not all ponies are like you, and ya need to respect their limitations. Give other ponies respect, and they in turn will give respect to you. It's why everypony loves Princess Celestia so much! It's all part of that 'responsibility' discussion we had the other day." Respect their limitations? If growing up in Cloudsdale taught me anything, it was that limitations were not something to be respected; they were to be surpassed. I suppose ponies like Joe were content with being mediocre, but that just wasn't for me. Ditzy and Fluttershy wanted to be better, I knew they did; they just hadn't realized it at the time. I honestly had no idea where 'respect' factored in, either. Nopony ever showed me respect while I was growing up, but I turned out fine. "Aw, don't make that face, kiddo. I'm just tryin' to help." I handed Joe the bits for our drinks, but damn if I didn't feel like skipping the tip. "Heck, maybe I'm completely off the mark? You're a grown mare, do what you think is right." "Ugh... yeah, alright. Thanks, Joe." I excused myself from my present company, as I had other places to be. "Apple Fritter, I'm taking off. Sorry you didn't like the drink." To my surprise, Fritter almost looked sad. Like, genuinely sad. "W-Wait, I didn't say I didn't like it! I'm glad I got to see you again, really! You... you ain't mad, are you?" "Of course not! Geez, you guys act like I'm some super villain bent on ruining lives or something. I know I've got superequine abilities, but come on now!" "Um, right. Sorry..." I felt a little bad, but the accusations were starting to grate on my nerves. "So... we can hang out again, right?" I was about halfway out the door, and barely gave a glance back. "Yeah, sure. Whatever." "I was jokin' about the tab! Honest!" "Cripes, get it together, Lightning." As I made my landing in Ponyville, I tried desperately to fortify myself mentally. I couldn't understand it; I never let other ponies get to me, at least not since I was a filly. Yet there I was, actually kind of feeling like I did something wrong. I didn't particularly care about Apple Fritter, but I wasn't trying to offend her with my outburst or anything. I figured her constant veil of inebriation would filter my natural snarkiness. Unless... maybe I was just being rude? Then there was Joe. I wasn't expecting a shower of praise for all of my hard work or anything, but having one of the few ponies you can actually call a friend undermine your efforts like that... "Ugh, screw this." I found myself in front of Carousal Boutique, and needed to get my sexiest face prepared for Rarity. "Joe doesn't know what he's talking about. I know I'm right. I have to be right. I'm freaking Lighting Dust, for crying out loud!" I still had time to spare before practice, but it was time better spent on something other than moping around. Like discussing potential flying suit ideas or prime wedding locations. With renewed vigor, I rapped that door harder than I probably should have in the wee hours. Luckily for me, Rarity didn't take long to open the door which meant I didn't wake her up from a beauty nap or anything. Not that she needed one, of course. She chuckled a bit when she saw me. "Goodness, Lightning, you're free to come in without knocking. This is technically a store, darling." "I know," I responded, despite having completely forgotten it wasn't just a house. "I guess I just wanted to be polite, you know? Since I'm such a well-mannered pony and everything." It was my first time actually being in the boutique, but it was about as meticulously clean and fabric-condensed as I imagined. "Nice place." "A lady always makes sure to clean up for guests." She levitated a pot of what I assumed was tea over to an occupied table. "I assume you're here to discuss those suits you mentioned, but you are more than welcome to stay for tea with Fluttershy and myself." "Don't mind if I do!" Without a second thought, I dashed to the first seat I could find. Sure enough, sitting across from me was none other than the wallflower herself. I gave Fluttershy a friendly smirk. "Try not to drink too much, champ. No pee breaks once the training starts." Fluttershy chuckled weakly, but otherwise seemed to be trying to avoid eye contact. Looked like we still had a long way to go. The tea pot floated gently to the center of the table, followed by what appeared to be blueprints for clothing of some sort. I couldn't make heads or tails of it, but dresses have never really been my thing. Rarity seated herself next to me, giving me ample view of both the sheet of paper and her shapely posterior. "I've never really tried making a flight suit before, so it should be quite a learning experience." In spite of her supposed lack of experience, she immediately started drawing various patterns and shapes with impressive precision. After some quick sketches, she pushed the blueprints closer to me. "I felt that these colors would match your coat and mane quite nicely, but I'd love to hear your input as well." "Looks good to me. Yellow seems to be a common theme with the team, so maybe some more pastel colors would work. Like, pink or light blue or something." Picturing it in my mind, a light blue and yellow suit would basically be me. A whole team of Lightning Dusts couldn't possibly be a bad thing. Once again, the pen scribbled lines every which way. "Yes, that does sound about right. You seem to have a fairly good sense of color, Lightning." "I've got a relative in the fashion industry, so I heard more about that stuff than I ever really wanted to." I honestly didn't think 'light color goes with light color' was considered advanced fashion knowledge, but the average citizen of Ponyville may think differently. "Well, one can never really know too much about good fashion sense. Rainbow Dash will wear just about anything so long as it looks 'cool'." I could definitely see Dash sacrificing practicality for coolness, but sometimes those are just the sacrifices we have to make. "She's lucky that her mane matches almost every color I can put on her... alright, I believe this suit is coming along quite nicely!" I took another look at the blueprint; it didn't look like a travesty, so I just assumed it was Bridleway quality. "Hey, not bad." I showed the sketch to Fluttershy, since she should have probably gotten some input on the suit she'd be wearing for a while. "How's it look, Shy? Could you see yourself being mobbed by adoring fans in something like this?" Fluttershy didn't look impressed; in fact, she kind of looked like she needed to vomit. I thought that maybe she just didn't have any fashion sense, but that turned out to not be the case. "It's, um... well, it's very nice, but I..." "You what?" "Well... listen, Lightning, I think you're, um, a really nice pony, but..." "But...?" Fluttershy gulped so hard I thought she was swallowing a freaking watermelon; that didn't go so well for me a few years back, so I prepared for the worst. Instead of upchucked melons, I got a rapid fire response. "I don't believe that I am cut out for your team and I'm really really sorry but I think I should be left out of it and I wish you the very best of luck please don't be upset." "Hold on." I almost would have preferred the alternative scenario to... to this. "You're quitting? After one day?" "Now darling," Rarity butted in, without the 'butt' I would have preferred. "There are plenty of other pegasi in town who would love to join your team. I'm sure if you asked they would be more than happy to-" "It has to be Fluttershy, though! Don't you want to impress Rainbow Dash when she gets back?" Fluttershy murmured some wishy-washy excuse, which I certainly wasn't in the mood for. "Look, I know it's a lot of work, but we're friends, right? Don't you want to help your friends?" Rarity sighed. "Lightning Dust, there's more to being friends than making them do things they don't want to do." "Okay, but..." I was at a loss; not even Rarity was on my side. Worse yet, I could easily see this conversation spinning around into that feelgood respect crap Joe was spewing earlier. I wasn't about to admit defeat. Not yet. "Fluttershy, what's it going to take to get you to help me out?" Fluttershy' expression changed to what I think may have been sympathy. Cripes, I hate being sympathized. "Um, well... I certainly don't mind helping you. I just don't think I can do what you want me to." "Sure you can! I-" I couldn't believe what I was about to say, but I was actually starting to get desperate. "I believe in you." "You... you do?" "Yep." In the pit of my stomach, the urge to kill myself was rising. "You've, uh, got tons of potential and you weren't... you know, you weren't too bad yesterday." The taste of bile was slowly invading my mouth; I was getting dangerously close to throwing up. "And we can take it... ugh, slow, if it would make you feel more comfortable." Fluttershy looked uncertain, but I think my bullshit was starting to sink in. "I'm not going to force you to stay on the team since, uh, that wouldn't be very respectful and stuff. But if you change your mind, both me and Ditzy who definitely isn't going to bale on me would love to see you there." I could see the cogs of Fluttershy's mind grinding away, and it became clear to me on how to deal with ponies like her. She was nice, and nice ponies respond to niceness. While milquetoast sentiments normally make me sick, it could be my one ticket to convincing her to help me out. I am such a smooth talker. "Well, I'm going to go now. I hope to see you later, Fluttershy, but if you don't want to come I won't hold it against you." I didn't stop to see how she responded; I simply excused myself and made for the door. "Thanks for the tea, Rarity. I'll see you about the suits later." "Er, anytime, Lightning." Rarity's voice seemed a bit off, most likely a side effect of my silver tongue. Yep, she'd be getting quite acquainted with it before long... okay, that was a little creepy. Speaking of creepy... "Hey, Ditzy, I know you're over there." I wasn't even the slightest bit surprised to see that grey weirdo skulk out from behind a nearby bush. "I hope your kid doesn't know about your hobbies. She might throw you in 'bad guy prison'." "Heh, yeah..." Ditzy scuffed the dirt a bit. She wasn't carrying her mailbag, so at least she was doing her stalking off duty. "I, um, I've got something to tell you, Dusty." "You're quitting the team, right?" "Sorry." The little sneak rubbed the back of her mane nervously. "I know it meant a lot to you, but I'm just not cut out for it." "No worries." "Wait... really?" "Yeah." I tried giving a sincere smile, but the bullshit marathon at the boutique left me a bit drained. But hey, the nice guy approach seemed to work with Fluttershy, so it was worth a shot. "I know you have a job and everything, and even though I'd love to have you and your limitless talent helping out, I certainly can't force you. That just wouldn't be very friend-like." "Oh." Ditzy stared at me for a moment, my kind words seeping into her simple mind. Suddenly, a doofy grin spread across her face. "Well, okay then. See ya around!" Just like that, she went back to spying on Rarity's house. "So... you're still in then?" "Nah, but I really appreciate how understanding you are. You're a good friend, Dusty!" Shit. This wasn't good. I couldn't tell if Ditzy was smart enough to see through my trap, or if she was too thick for it to register in her brain. Either way, being nice didn't work, and that wasn't gonna work with me. "Well, I mean, I'd still really like to see you later." "Sure! I can show you this really neat diner down the road from my place. It serves the best salads in town... at least, that's what their ads say!" "That's not-" No. I couldn't blow it. I had to keep my cool and win her over. How would Rainbow Dash have convinced her friends to do something that would be beneficial to them in the long run? Did her magic "Element of Harmony" powers make her friends just do stuff for her? "Have I ever told you how much I respect you, Ditzy?" "Aw, thanks, Dusty! I respect you too!" Buck me sideways, this was getting me nowhere! I tried to think; maybe I could just leave her out and have a two-mare team? No... history has proven that teams consisting of more ponies tend to have less inner conflicts. This was a scientifically proven fact, based on one scenario from my own experience! It had to be true! I could find another pony, but training a pony who isn't garbage wouldn't prove anything! I didn't really have time to run around looking for the next worst flier in town, either. Ditzy was the one, but I needed to find a way to make her budge. "You gotta be willing to give your friends what they want sometimes if you're gonna expect them to give you what you want. I really, really didn't want to submit to Joe's philosophy on relationships; however, I may have been looking at what he said from the wrong angle. I knew Ditzy truly wanted to get better, despite what her simple mind was telling her, but maybe trying to sweeten the deal a bit couldn't hurt. "Say, Ditzy," I said, sitting down next to the mailmare, "how much money do you make at your job, anyway?" "Oh, um..." Her face explained her financial situation much better than her words ever could have. "I make... enough, I guess." "Really? Well, you know, as your coach I'd be willing to offer you some sort of monetary compensation for your efforts. If you wanted to stay on the team, of course." I could figure out the issue of where I'd be getting the bits later. "I couldn't possibly expect you to pay to watch me bumble around. Thanks, though!" I could feel the sweat start to form on my head. If I couldn't even convince my own fliers to bucking fly, how could I ever prove myself as the ultimate Wonderbolt material? "I'll clean your house. Every day. I'm pretty good with a duster!" No response. She was too absorbed in her reconnaissance mission. "I'll cook dinner." I was disgusted at my behavior; I, the impeccably immaculate Lightning Dust, was humbling myself before... Ditzy. "And breakfast. I'll weed your lawn. I'll walk Dinky to school." Still nothing. "I'll do your job for you again. I'll show you my super secret ultimate flying stunt, banned in thirteen cities. I'll give you a hoof job." I was saving myself for marriage, but dammit I was desperate. Ditzy gave me a contemplative glance. "Hmm... nah, that's alright." Sure enough, she went right back to staring at Rarity's stupid house. I couldn't believe it. Not even a hoof job! From me! Joe's stupid crap was proving itself to be, well, crap. It was like nothing mattered to her except for- ... No. I wouldn't. I couldn't. Pretty much every self-respecting mare, authority figure, and counselor would tell me I shouldn't. I normally don't put much thought into how my words and actions affect other ponies but dammit, there were just some things even I wouldn't do. This wasn't like reading some stupid diary or destroying an orphanage; what I had in mind was grade-A, unadulterated scumbaggery the likes of which no pony should ever be subjected to. The question was... would it be worth it? "Hey, Ditzy." "Yeah, Dusty?" "I promise that if you stay on the team, I'll... I'll hook you up with Rarity after the preshow." The answer was 'yes'. Yeah, I was definitely going to Tartarus, but that wouldn't be for a very long time. Hopefully.