My left eyelid flickered, with flashes of pain and discomfort, but it could not close. A bright light blinded me, as even my right eye could not see anything beyond a pony shape in the darkness. I could not move, not so easily, my chin pressed against a hard surface.
The pressure on the left side of my face suddenly disappeared, and, with a blissful sigh, I saw the light grow dim, then fade away. For a second, the room remained tainted by a darkness my vision could not pierce, with dots of blurry darkened colors dancing in front of me. But soon enough, somepony threw the windows open, lighting up the examination room and giving me a full clear sight of the doctor in the middle of this dull green room.
“It appears, young stallion, that you are indeed uninjured,” that doctor version of Caramel declared, happily putting his flashlight back into his white coat. “You look pristine, as good as new.”
That, or the spell hides even my injuries… That’s a scary thought.
Careful not to let my unease ruin the shy smile I was showing, I moved away from the counter and took a few steps toward the doctor. His attention had shifted to a small tablet on which he held some papers. Rapidly, his eyes darting from one side to another, he made his quill scramble against the forms.
“So I’m fit for work next monday?” I asked, feeling a tickling sensation running up my legs.
I really had to leave this place behind soon. It was as if I had ants in my limbs.
The brownish stallion didn’t seem to notice, absorbed by his work. Between two marks, he turned to me with a grin and shrugged. “I don’t see a medical reason for you not to go.”
You did not spot that I am in fact an alicorn, though, I thought on the inside, while just nodding and muttering a quick word of thanks to him. That has got to be a mark against you in my resume.
One might think the wings I had clamped against my sides so hard they became numb would be a dead giveaway, but Celly’s spell had been remarkably well-conceived. Not once did he suspect anything when physically examining me! Not even that accursed height difference tipped him off.
He had “slipped” a few times too. Whenever he was aiming for a precise spot on me, there had always been a miss. This, in turn, meant that aiming for one eye, he’d hit the cheek bones. Thrice. The spot still felt sore.
If it had been me, I might have stopped apologizing so much and tried to figure out the reason my expertise was continuously failing me when dealing with a particular stallion. But then again, ponies were trusting fellows…
Images of a posh castle flashed in my mind.
Okay, maybe it’s more of a countryside thing…
And another image, but this time that of a white stallion with a blonde mane, willing to put his faith in my words alone, even after I had thoroughly insulted him.
…Maybe I’m just imagining things. It’s a spell Celestia crafted after all, it’s can’t be that easy to find out…
With a small shake of my head, I diverted my focus to my surroundings, letting the stronger circulation of air of the hallways reach me. It soothed me, if only for a small moment. There were far more activity here than in that examination room.
“Passing through!” A nurse shouted, and I backed away into the wall, in time to see a pink mare push a wheelchair-bound old-timer right where I had just stood. In fact, she had moved fast enough for a small gust of air to hit me the second afterward.
For a second, I fought against the grin my lips threatened to break into. It would probably make ponies ask question if they thought I smiled after a nurse had nearly hit me with a wheelchair. Hay, I would ask myself if I was unwell if I were in their horseshoes.
Putting back a mask of neutrality, I walked down the hallway toward the southern end, where I had first came in to start the standard tests. Going past the mare at the receptionist’s desk, I trotted into the adjacent room where I was greeted by a peculiar sound. A long suffering groan of boredom rose from the depth of the room and I directed my gaze that way, recognizing that voice amongst every other.
There, on the cushions of the waiting room, splayed across four of them in the most ‘I’m-bored-the-buck-out-of-my-mind’ posture I had seen in a long time, was Calx, muttering to himself about the unfairness of everything. But mostly about how long this was taking with the doctor.
Torn between the desire to end his suffering and the tradition of big brothers everywhere to screw things up for their younger siblings, I made my way to him, slowly, without making a sound. A fraction of my attention had been put precisely to the task of making my approach completely silent.
I passed by a few other ponies, one of them holding up an old magazine in the air with her magic, the rest looking blankly ahead of themselves or at the number paper in their hooves. None bothered to give me their attention, since, you know, I wasn’t part of the hospital staff.
“Feather Dust,” I said.
Ears standing up instantly, Calx’s head snapped in my direction.
“Finally!” He rolled over, getting his rump off the cushions and unto the floor, but not his upper body. That part of him remained firmly set where they were before.
At the very least, his halfhearted attempt to stand, namely move one front hoof up, showed that it was not entirely planned. It did not, however, mean that he wanted to try anything more.
I chuckled, feeling rightly amused by the indignant look on his face. “Bored?”
“It’s a conspiracy,” he grumbled, refusing eye contact and burying his face into his pillow. “I bet it’s your fault too, Sam. You’ve told everypony to make every day super boring.”
Boring? Oh you little brat, I can’t have a day with nothing happening and I would make sure everypony leaves you alone? …Actually, that does sound like something I would do…
Defeated by my own brain, I decided to forego arguing. I went with the ancestral technique of poking-until-sufficiently-annoyed. The orange fur I pushed seemed to strangely absorb every push though, somewhat like a lazing cat’s would.
“Yes, and when you reach maximal levels of boredom, you will do everything I say just to stop being so bored.”
“Evil.” He rolled his eyes. “And cliché.”
“Well, minion, time to go back to our lair.” I rolled my eyes in turn, giving him a dubious look when he didn’t move. To motivate him, I levitated one of his legs in the air, but it fell flat again a second later. “Seriously, bro, move your rump. We’re leaving this place behind us.”
That seemed to get a reaction out of him.
“We are?” He asked, suddenly attentive.
“Yeah, I’ve passed all the tests. Now come on, stand up and we’ll be able to leave.”
However, just as Calx had finally registered that his boredom would soon come to an end, I heard some scrambling noise behind me.
“New guy?” Some new voice called me, making me freeze right in my tracks.
Horseapples! Why didn’t I pay more attention?
Reluctant, I turned around, pretending to take in the image of the gray mare, as she was, standing a few meters away from me next to a coffee machine. “C-Cloudchaser?”
“What were you doing here? Are you looking for Thunderlane’s room?”
Making my ears droop, I looked away, hoping to show the image of a slightly ashamed pony. “A-actually, I just finished my medical check-up. Y-you know… That thing they ask of employees that are involved in an incident. T-to make sure I’m still physically, mentally and emotionally sound.”
Hearing this, her mouth formed a thin line, pinched together. On her face was the expression of somepony that knew all too well what I had gone through. And would rather forget it ever happened.
“So, what’s the result? Am I working with a psycho in disguise?” She asked in jest, though with little heart behind her jab.
I was glad that I had perfected my poker face so much. You have no idea…
Deliberately putting too much enthusiasm in my response, I gave her an exaggerated grin. “Well, I am in the seventh-group most likely to snap… But other than that, they said I am a likely invaluable member of society!”
It was ridiculously awkward.
With a perfect mix of eye rolling and half-smile, she gave me a knowing look, the very same one would give to a friend whose attempt at being funny had fallen flat, excessively so.
Good, I thought with some satisfaction, that should do the trick.
Under his breath, Calx snorted. “Seventh?”
That comment earned him a flick of my tail to his face, but it didn’t stop his laughter in the least.
Now, Cloudchaser seemed a little cheered up by our antics. At the very least, the world didn’t look like it weighted as much on her as before.
“Thanks for the reassurance. I’ll make sure to ask the boss not to put us on the same team,” she said, a bit more sincere in her humor than before. “But I’ll also bring the occasional cupcake to you, just in case.”
“My stomach will appreciate that…” I muttered, pausing for a few seconds, with just the occasional twitch on my body. Then, when enough time had passed, I spoke up again. “Anyway… Y-you were going to his room?”
“Yeah, I just needed some coffee.” She glanced insistently at the cup tray balancing on her wing. “Plus, Thunderlane not so subtly hinted that he wanted a few minutes alone with Rumble.”
How easily I could summon up the memories of earlier today, when we were just goofing up and messing around, telling each other how much we cared for our little brothers. That competition we had had in jest… it had probably come closer than I would have dared admit.
“How… how is he?” I asked, feeling my stomach twist.
To my displeasure though, she did not answer right away. In fact, Cloudchaser had rather taken a moment to ponder it, remaining silent.
This one unnerved me. I just didn’t see this little oddball coming.
“You know what they say?” She smirked, waving her eyebrows in a taunt. “Best way to know is to see for yourself.”
There was something about the way she was looking at me…
“Oh, yes, I g-guess you’re… right,” I said, with some difficulties, but also with a strange bubbling relief in my chest.
“Then, the two of you should follow me, it’s u-”
The yelp of a pony cut her right off. Swiftly, the two of us had both turned our heads, toward a young mare that had almost tripped on Calx.
His forehead resting against the wall, albeit at an angle, it seemed like he had attempted to bang his head on the wall. With a jolt of anxiety, I realized that a reason for his failure was the presence of his horn under the illusion, a fact that Cloudchaser had to remain unaware of.
“It won’t be long!” Calx jumped from the unexpected proximity of my voice, with an innate understanding that me using this power of mine meant I was serious. “Now get your flanks over here.”
Instincts instilled in him since his early childhood winning over the indignation, for now, he ran up to my sides, scowling.
“Foals,” I mouthed off silently, glancing meaningfully toward the shape of my sulking little brother.
Nodding in understanding – and I could have sworn, caution –, the gray mare quickly led the way along the hallways, going from the testing rooms, to the cardiac department, in which we thankfully just trotted through,
But, as we were approaching the room, I allowed myself to turn my attention inward, toward their voices. Shameful maybe, however my curiosity got the better of me. As a friend and a brother myself, I had this… this desire to know if things turned well. Severely ingrained lectures from my mother only got contained when the happy consequences became clear to me.
And I felt the urge to stop us from barging in right at the wrong time.
“Oh, huh, Mrs. Cloudchaser?” I called her, with the familiar hint of timidity.
Her steps came to a halt, as she looked at me with the beginning of a frown. “Yeah?”
“It’s only been enough time to get a coffee? A-are you sure there was enough time for them to talk?” At this, her expression turned pensive. I could tell that she was giving my remark consideration. “P-perhaps, it would be best… you know… to wait just a little bit longer.”
And as soon as I had said that, somepony cut her before she could ever try to give an answer. And in a memorable manner too.
Calx swore. Loudly.
Cloudchaser instantly turned to him with wide eyes, her mouth dropping in slight shock. His own grimace dared her to say something while he was stuck waiting again, after he had been promised that it wouldn’t take long.
On my side of this, I was desperately keeping a mildly stern look on my face, while all I wanted to do was laugh my rump off. This had definitely crossed back from annoying and into funny again.
“Language,” was all I managed to say. My voice was shaking a bit too much to convincingly convey disapproval, in my opinion.
If her half-amused look was any indication, then she didn’t really mind. In any case, she went on without making a comment, at the very least.
“It took some time to get to the coffee machine, and I honestly can’t imagine those two really fighting,” she recalled distantly, before her brows furrowed together as she looked at me. “Are you sure?”
Considering what they were saying at the moment…
“But even if I had a horrible day, that was not right of me, Rumble! I’m sorry!”
“I am,” I said without the slightest hint of hesitation, allowing myself to show my conviction through those two words alone.
“Alright.” She nodded, uncertain.
Cloudchaser took a sip of her coffee cup, looking ahead of herself without much care for more small talk.
I whispered some things in Calx’s ears, things the air didn’t carry to Cloudchaser’s ears, or anypony else for that matters. At first, it seemed to have surprised him, but quickly enough, he broke into an excited grin. So, with a few more words, I coaxed him into settling down next to me, and got him to think.
Eyes closed, him leaning against me and an unnoticeable blanket of air over his body, we thought of things beyond the mere wall of the hospital, of things… in a scope beyond mortal comprehensions.
In a rapid succession, I felt the green of the land beneath me, as a growing sea that went untouched and defiant, the friable sand, shapeless and evermoving, covering the hidden but strong earth itself, then the marshes and the wastelands, desolate and saddening. I imagined it would feel somewhat the same for him, looking up at me from the lower ground.
We went at it with invisible sparks, good-natured lashes, taunts in forms untold, as a mock fight not unlike friendly wrestling. It took different shapes, escalating in sudden intervals, only to dwindle quickly. It changed quite a few times, until it reached the best part.
The most common grounds of us both, the oddities in the otherwise smooth shape of the world, somehow. Tunnels and careers, mountains and high peaks, where the earth reached for the sky or the sky seemed to stretch downward. They were those… those pieces of the world that meant the most to us, as they seemed to refuse that otherwise clear separation. Soon, it devolved into another game of sort, where he would try to shift those passages around and I would find a way to still infiltrate my consciousness further, where I would evade him and he’d rise up above and higher.
The good news was that at least the playing softened up Calx’s anger. When I deemed the time right for us to go see Thunderlane and Rumble, he seemed not perfectly happy, but certainly not pissed off anymore. His hooves dragged a bit against the ground, and his wings had the uncommon flutter of restlessness. Still much better than he could have been.
Actually, Cloudchaser seemed just a tiny bit more annoyed than him, to tell the truth. Her first reaction to my announcement had been to roll her eyes with exasperation. It stung a little.
Then again, if someone had suddenly asked me to wait until I went to see some injured friends of mine, I would be snappy too.
The thought made me scoff, though with a bitterness that surprised me. I would need to have true friends for that, ones that know the real me. Fat chances of that ever happening…
As if to prevent any more delay, the gray mare moved swiftly, going through the distance separating us from Thunderlane’s room in a blink of an eye. We had barely made it behind her that she stepped inside, with us in tow.
“You’ve got visitors,” she announced. “Fresh from the examination center too.”
“Huh?” I heard him say. “Who is it?”
“The new guy,” was all Cloudchaser gave me as a cue, before she abruptly stepped aside and pushed me a few steps forward with her wings.
It took some self-control not to yelp in an undignified way at that. For a second, I had felt the touch of her feathers around my midsection, close to my wings. Through sheer luck, she hadn’t made contact with them.
Stumbling, my hooves uncoordinated by the surprise, they found their foundation quickly enough, thankfully. It had almost ended badly there. Then, shaking my head, I directed my gaze forward, straight at my bedridden friend.
He looked… better, which wasn’t that big of a compliment. His fur as a whole was messy, in some places shortened by broken strands of hair. Still, my gaze was more attracted to his wings, to the feathers that looked broken or singed. The experience, as brief as it had been, had messed him up pretty badly.
Above his bed, I could see some of those square bags hooked up to one of his legs. Fluids dripped slowly from the bag, gathered in a pocket, probably for the nurses to later inject as needed. It seemed not to affect him badly, as Thunderlane had been grinning at his little brother without a care for the instruments around them.
And when his eyes fell on me, they seemed more sober, yes, but in some ways… caring too.
…Why?
“H-hey Thunderlane,” I said lamely, still too distracted by his apparent fondness of me.
Ponies are foul creatures! Liars! Or at least, that’s what I remembered feeling, just hours ago. But this pony here, in this bed, made it harder and harder for me to hold up this point of view.
Not to mention, he was on a roll.
“Hi Cloud. How are you holding up?” He asked, as if I was the one in the hospital bed instead!
This made something twist in my guts, painfully.
“I-I’m fine...” I forced myself to give him a smile, however little I could manage. “I’ll be back to work next Monday.”
“Oh, so you got unlucky then?” He chuckled a bit, though the twitch of muscles at the corner of his mouth hinted toward a less positive outlook of his situation.
For everypony’s sake, I decided to humor him. A bit of over played drama and sarcasm would do wonder for us. “I guess so. Is the jealousy I feel toward you normal?”
Smug, he gave me a lopsided grin. “Every stallion in town feels that way, so, yeah.”
“And every mare wishes to wring your neck out,” Cloudchaser quipped, which made him deflate almost comically. “I guess that even things out, eh?”
“Not every mare in town…” He muttered under his breath, his tone turned sullen while his wings had clamped against him and his wounded ego.
Just then, however, luck stopped this from becoming really awkward, by having two foals greet each other in recognition. Our heads snapping toward the noises, we only got to see an orange cannonball rush for Rumble with an excited call.
“So this is Feather Dust?” Thunderlane croaked, getting the attention of said little colt, right as he was able to engage in deeper conversation with Rumble.
“Huh?” Calx blinked, twisting around when he heard ‘his’ name. “Yeah, that’s me an’ all. Nice to meet you.”
“Nice to meet you too, Feather Dust. I heard about you.” He chuckled, eyes glittering with a playful light that made entirely too much sense with what he said next. “I had imagined you taller.”
The reference obviously clicked for my brother as it did for me, but whereas I tried to contain my laughter, Calx groaned. “Did he tell you about that?!”
Not leaving him enough time to answer, he ran up to the dark stallion’s bed, hooves firmly against the bedframe as he scowled.
“I swear it worked!” His tone was a strange mixture of panic and boldness. “Like, big times! I was totally in control the entire time!”
In full view of everypony else, I smacked my hoof against my forehead.
The other adults at the scene knew better than to contradict his claims. The smart idea was, of course, to look indulgent and nod along with what he said, murmuring words of encouragement if needed.
“What’s that?” Rumble asked, glancing between his pal and his big brother in confusion. “What did you do?”
The intervention of another foal his age cut his rant off completely. In fact, it deflated him quite a bit. With the spell coloring his fur orange, he blushed from ears to cheeks a deep red.
“Huh…”
Pleading silently with his eyes, the little guy grimaced pitifully, ears flattened against his skull. It appeared that he was hoping for a swift rescue, appealing to a mercy I didn’t quite felt like showing.
Haha, nope. Squirm, bro. SQUIRM!
Hey, if he insisted that it had been a good idea, I wasn’t going to contradict him anymore. He was free to dig himself deeper.
“It’s… huh… something that, like, happened… sometime ago.”
“Is it like the time when that mare was the fifteenth to say ‘no’?” Rumble questioned, with a little insistence and annoyance at being deflected. “Or more like the time somepony asked him if he needed some water to help him through his ‘dry streak’?”
With that, the atmosphere shifted drastically. First, I was akin to a deer in headlights, eying the gray colt with shock. Obviously, from the way Rumble was taken aback by Thunderlane’s, Cloudchaser’s and my reaction, he hadn’t quite understood the meaning behind that expression. Except that very soon, the initial moment of stillness passed, leaving me the center of the unwanted attention.
Under their scrutiny, my face was burning hot. And it did not help things that Cloudchaser was laughing behind her hoof! Even Thunderlane was pretty much chuckling quietly.
Well, buck. Beaten at my own game. That little squirt!
Of them all, he was the one clearly enjoying it the most. In my gaze was the promise of revenge soon planned and executed. In his was the bravado of a colt too headstrong for his own good, with the classical ‘bring-it-on’ expression painted all over his face.
For a few minutes, nopony said anything, save for Rumble who grumbled about being left out of the loop. It was a comfortable atmosphere, in which I could feel the tension leave my muscles, as if washed away by invisible waves. A few ponies gathered that could laugh, if only for a short while, even in the face of a dangerous accident and the traps of life.
Unfortunately, that relaxed ambiance we had created came to an unpleasant end. In the middle of his and Clouchaser’s uninterrupted snickering, rougher sound came from the black pegasus’ direction.
Rushing to his sides, we all crossed the space separating us from Thunderlane’s bed. Even my legs had moved before I could think about what I was doing, and thus I was standing right next to Cloudchaser when she placed a hoof under his back and lifted him into a sitting position.
“My throat feels like hors-” He clamped his mouth shut, looking at his brother and mine. “…Like sandpaper.”
Cloudchaser sent him a worried look. “Did the doctor say something about that?”
“Oh, it’s not that bad.” Thunderlane waved his hoof in front of himself, sheepish. “This is the second time I’ve been sent here, pretty much for the same problem. The cold does that to me.”
I blinked. “Really? This has happened before?” You can’t mean the windigoes!
“Yeah, I got lost during a snowstorm, only found the next morning. And even then, it was apparently a near miss,” he recalled with some agitation.
Images flashed in my mind, images of a cold plain, whiter than anything I had ever seen, reflecting the light of the sun and illuminating the ghost horses above. Stranger was the simple satisfaction I felt, nestled down in my heart, at the sight of this dead scenery.
For a brief moment, I feared my unease had shown on my face, but if the others noticed at all, they might have attributed it to the nature of Thunderlane’s story. In any case, he continued his explanation, his mouth twisting into a grimace.
“Celestia’s pl- crown! I never thought a black stallion would be so hard to see in the middle of a snowfield!”
“Yeah, you’d think this kind of thing wouldn’t happen, but…” I let my voice trail off, not sure what else I could say, truly.
Suddenly, Thunderlane’s expression softened, losing the hardness of anger to a much kinder and gentler smile. “T-thanks, Cloud. Really. I-I’ve been treating you like crap all day long a-and… and you saved my life.”
“Morning,” I said, doing my best to appear bashful.
“What?” He blinked.
“You treated me like crap all morning long.” I scratched the back of my head with my hoof, giving him a small smile. “The rest of the day was quite nice actually. Kinda fun too.”
It seemed to stun him, as his eyes widened and his words died in his throat. The guilt had been big enough that he had refused to consider the good alongside the bad.
I guess that’s one more thing we have in common. My eyes fell to the little guys that were hanging by the bedframe, standing on their hindlegs for a better look. Neither looked particularly happy at the time, which the sole mare in the room noticed.
“Hey, Rumble.” Her grey hoof lifted his head toward her own, wearing that half smirk of hers. “Have you told your friend about that new game you came up with the other day?”
Lighting up at the mention of a game, Calx jumped on the opportunity.
“What’s it like?” He asked, his wings buzzing again. “How do you play? Is it like, a flying game? I love those, but obviously my big bro’s not gonna play much on that side!”
A little overwhelmed by the sudden barrage of questioning, the grey colt didn’t think much, blinking and not resisting the pull on his legs.
And as simple as that, my little brother had swept his friend away, getting him to open up with a smile. I swear, he’s bigger than life or something… He does that all the time. H-he was… like that before, right?
I nearly jolted when a hoof grabbed my own shoulder. Head snapping around, I came face to face with a sober, guilty friend. With a mental slap to the back of my head, I forced myself to calm down. From the look in his eyes, I would need it.
“I had to tell you…” He hesitated, his breath hitching and his gaze darting around. “W-what you did today…”
“Thunderlane…” My voice started to strain as well. I wanted him to stop this. With every expression of pain flashing across his face, a pinch in my chest occurred. In the back of my mind, I could feel the heaviness of a powerful sadness threatening to breach through my mask.
“I don’t think I can thank you enough…” He continued with a whisper, and in his eyes I saw a glint of something… sad and happy.
My memories of Luna came, of her stern look and her thundering voice. In it, she spoke of warnings, of my responsibilities as the one that had likely awakened the windigoes again. With just that, claws of guilt started to reach for my throat.
“You don’t need to…” I pleaded, ears flat against my skull.
Of course, he ignored it. This was something he had to do for himself.
“If not for you, the last memory Rumble would have of me… it would be of us fighting,” he choked, a few tears starting to roll down his cheeks. “I-I can’t… I wouldn’t have wanted this to be a burden on him for the rest of his life!”
“Thunderlane, it’s okay!” My voice rose, as I felt my breathing accelerate. Fighting a sense of urgency, I patted his shoulder gently, feeling the bottom of my vision blur too. “You have this chance to make up with him. You’re both going to be okay and this isn’t where things end!”
As if my words had broken both his guilt and his fear, he let out a loud snort of relief right in the middle of his crying, and he immediately hid his face behind his legs in embarrassment. “Thank you so much, Cloud...”
The use of my fake name was like a stab in the chest. You shouldn’t be thanking me.
Uncomfortable, I did not know what to say. It felt… indecent that I accept it, as if I was taking credit I didn’t deserve. For all I knew, the only reason he was ever in danger was my presence with him on that cloud.
Cloudchaser herself seemed to be pointedly trying to stay focused on the two little guys. Her gaze flickered toward mine once, but otherwise, she didn’t acknowledge me. This was something between Thunderlane and me.
But with two stallions refusing to talk, which we could luckily chalk up to stallions not wishing to speak about their feelings – or at least I would –, things weren’t moving forward. A heavy silence seemed to form an invisible wall.
My tail flickered, and my hoof started to scratch the tiles on the floor. I really wanted to talk about something else now.
“W-will you be alright for taking care of Rumble for the next few days?” I asked without thinking. “I could help you with that if yo-”
“That’s already taken care of, new guy.” A gray hoof rose to my eyelevel, as its owner smirked fondly at me. “I’m bringing the little sweetheart back home with Flitter and me until Thunderlane’s out of this place.”
“Yeah, Flitter wouldn’t let me take no for an answer.” His smile faded around the edge, as his expression turned worried. “She was kinda scary about that too…”
“I see.” Yeah, I could see that, considering how she was earlier.
“Still, thanks for the proposition, Cloud.” He grabbed my shoulder, looking grateful. “It means a lot.”
I could not help but smile back. “You offered your help earlier. It’s only right I do the same, isn’t it?”
“Well, yeah…” His face crunched up for a second, and a strange noise came out of his mouth. It was as if he had tried not to open his mouth, without success.
Was that a yawn?
“S-so I know what it means, Cloud.” He went on as if nothing had happened, but I could see now that he was trying to stay awake, forcibly.
“I think we’ll leave you to rest.” I glanced at Calx, then back to him. “You look like you could use the sleep.”
Eyes half-closed, he gave a dismissive snort. “Nah, I always look fresh as a rose.”
A shriveled one, maybe.
To my amusement, I caught Cloudchaser muttering that this might be true in terms of appearance, but that in terms of morning breath…
I held back a snort.
“Yeah, but even roses have their downtime. Feather Dust, come here,” I called for him gently, and was relieved to see him comply. “Say goodbye, bro, we’re going home now.”
“Oh, okay…” he replied, a little saddened to leave now that he had gotten to do something fun. “I guess I’ll see you in school, Rumble?”
With a nod, Rumble agreed and waved at him. “See you later!”
“See you!”
With a curt nod to Cloudchaser, I gave Calx a little push forward, and we left the room. Though I should be, I wasn’t quite at ease with this. This meeting had been… significant.
Behind me, I left one stallion alone with his brother and his friend, alone with the relief of what hadn’t come to pass. And in essence, I also left him with a new desire, with a course of actions for him to take, lest he leaves only regrets behind his own passing.
Mending bonds… before it becomes too late…
I could not help but ponder myself, but think back on the ponies I had clashed with. They were a certain number of them, more than I would have liked, admittedly.
Parting with my anger, before it turns into regrets… Can I do that? Can I actually do that? This anger, this hatred, it had been a part of me for a while now.
Oh, there was something in Ponyvile we definitely had to do quickly. Before we lost our chance.
Calx walking ahead of me, I let him lead the way. He bounced around fully taking in the notion of it being a weekend just starting. No doubt in his minds, there were a few projects on how to spend this time judiciously. If I was lucky, then, maybe, there wouldn’t be an earthquake. Explaining that to Celly would be hell.
Though… the image of serene, unflappable Celestia spitting her tea all over her messenger when she got the news got a chuckle out of me.
Walking by the entrance of the hospital, I noticed a nurse sending me a weird look. She probably thought it was unusual to have somepony leave this kind of place while laughing, but hey, for once I felt good about something, I wasn’t about to hold back on it.
Just like in Thunderlane’s room, now that I thought about it. Seeing him alone had reached into my core. It had felt terrible to see him in such a pitiful state. And guilt had been eating away at me when he tried to thank me for my role in today’s events!
Guilt…
That… that wasn’t… I felt guilty… I empathize with a pony?
Not only that, I had experienced a pretty diverse palette of emotions, actually… without the usual, petty urges to silence somepony permanently.
W-why? Why does this bother me?
The answer came to me quickly, as I could not help but frown at my own discovery. The mark of annoyance had appeared on my face before I could rein it in. While I managed to push it back afterward, to cement my mask on my face again, it turned out to be harder than I remembered.
My ability to hide my emotions was hindered by this change. So, I could guess that this was one reason for this tremor in my chest. Still, more importantly, why? Why had this happened at all? What could have been the trigger?
Even as I formulated the thought, I knew the answer, and felt the biggest of fools for not seeing it sooner.
Would this mean… that the windigoes…?
I had encountered four of them. Both times had happened in the exact same manner. A desire stronger than my rational thoughts had overcome me, overcome all but the basest of thoughts and left me a savage creature, if only for a moment. T-then…
Once I had… dealt with them…
“His behavior became… less emotional, more paused and patient. Things… things didn’t affect him as strongly as before.”
If… if tearing his soul apart created the windigoes, w-what had been done to me in return when I took those fragments back? He tried… he tried to fight away an overwhelmingly strong hatred, by detaching it from him, until he was void of empathy.
Luna had told me I was the most likely reincarnation of a fallen alicorn. I could believe that. A part of me could. But, the significance of this…
W-was this darkness not even mine to begin with? I-is it possible that I…?
Suddenly, my throat tightened to a painful extent. My eyes stung and burned, thousands of needles prickling them until I had to stop.
A flash to my left made me flinch. Turning, I saw the sun reflecting over the large window of a furniture shop. Right next to that blazing orb though, there was a young unicorn stallion.
Eyes of a greenish blue looked back behind an illusion, with an air of eagerness I could empathize with. They weren’t a cesspool of swirling loathing, of destructive decadence. For the first time since my coming in Equestria, my own image didn’t tell me of a hidden darkness underneath the surface. It simply appeared to belong to a stallion a little out of his depth. In an instant, a blazing need ignited in my chest. I wanted to be this pony, so much more than what I had been!
Hoof raised, my reflection pushed back at my touch, but it barely felt hot under the sun. The touch made a little cold go up my leg, and finally, pensive, hopeful, eyes fixated on the symmetry between both orange hooves, I allowed myself to think it, that sweet ideal.
Is it possible that I’m not… a monster?
“Sam?”
Another reflection had showed up in the boutique’s window, one of my brother, looking up to me curiously.
“Oh,” I said, a little unsteady on my hooves, “I was just thinking about a few things we’re still missing back at our place.”
“Yeah, like games!” He took off, zipping around me a few times, before stopping right on the level of my face. “Seriously, we have nothing fun at home, ‘cept the comics we borrowed from the library!”
“I’ll think about it.”
Oh, that would not do for him. Two hooves grabbing the sides of my face, he gave me his patented puppy eyes. “Pleaaaaaaaaaase?”
I rolled my eyes at that. “I’ll think about it strongly.”
Seeing his technique fail against the grandmaster that had taught him, Calx resolved to try the childish pout of dissatisfaction, in hope to instill feelings of fear in his guardian. It just so happened I was also immune to that technique.
“Move along, squirt.” I pushed him away, snorting. “I can bet you’re hungry.”
He shrugged. “Yeah, kinda.”
“Well, you’re only getting fed at our place, so get going.”
“’Kay…” he replied without enthusiasm, opting to drop to the ground and trot.
Watching him go, it took me a second to follow suit, trying to get my ideas in order again.
Not a monster, eh? I thought about the force of my wings against my sides, about this lie I was living once more. It was a fairly dastardly thing to do… but this was a necessity. It was to protect us… and others. Perhaps, perhaps not… Was it true? Was I really sincere in those thoughts I had? I… I’ve always been protective of him… of our family…
Though that didn’t quite chase my doubts, it helped. A little. However, while a peaceful afternoon was ending over Ponyville, I had to slow down, feeling unwell.
There was something else, inching at my consciousness. At first, it felt faint, almost a ghost of an impression, but with each passing second, it became clearer, louder. Not halfway through my step, the memory struck me and I understood what my mind had supplied me.
A sound. Simple and repetitive. It came in an uneven rhythm, as it held, to create its own message.
A part of me broke at the realization, as only one thing I knew of could create that singular yet still very familiar sound.
Fingers. The sound came from ten digits hitting a keyboard, over and over again.
Pages upon pages of angry rants, that was all I could think back then. But even in my memories, those dimly lit texts, coming off the dull light of a computer screen, radiated with an oozing evil. They had held the intent to kill, the roar of a monster made to see the day, a cry for blood left unclenched.
I remembered the hatred I had felt… I knew I could summon it back all too easily, with the same intensity, from the knowledge of what had transpired alone.
Because I could not let go of that. I could not. It went against every fiber of my being to willingly forget a threat to my family. Or even the risk of one. I would rather die than let anything happen to any of them. I would kill sooner than let them suffer!
For a brief instant, the world blurred with my anger rising.
And that beautiful, soaring hope came crashing down.
I wasn’t yet this ‘me’ back then. There’s no excuse. I wanted them to suffer, I still do. I’m not a good pony.
What would they think? Mom and Dad… if they ever knew what I became, how would they react to the knowledge that their son is a horrible stallion?
Funny how I say it all the time, yet it never ceases to hurt me.
I ignored the darkening of the day, I looked up at the sun ahead, soon to set over the horizon and turn crimson. My thoughts were turned toward the future. What was in store for us? Celly hadn’t come forward with any solution yet, but this was a complicated issue, otherwise I would have found the answer myself already.
Pushing it all down, I did my best to seem enthused by our return in our little house, since the week was over by this point. We’d have a whole two days for ourselves in Ponyville. Or so I told him with a grin.
I knew it worked, at first.
However, soon enough, Calx frowned, giving me a look just like the ones back then in Canterlot. He knew that it was all a mask again. And inwardly, I was asking him to pretend a bit that everything was fine, that even if today was a bad day, I would put on this façade and act like it wasn’t for his sake and those around us. It was rather easy for me by this point. So I smiled, chuckled and joked, a few times with sincerity too.
Even if the inside of my chest felt burning with cold.
--
Rainbow Dash was the first to step inside. They entered right afterward.
At first stumbling in the dark, Twilight was quick to channel magic into her horn and cast a spell to light up the hut. All three of them gaped in horror, as even with the reports of Applebloom and Big Mac, they hadn’t been quite prepared for this.
The whole tree had been emptied. No traces of this ever being a habitation remained besides the presence of a door and some heavily locked windows. The wooden panels block any light from illuminating their surroundings. Twilight’s horn remained the only thing allowing them to see past their muzzles.
Tired of this, Rainbow Dash flew to the closest window and tried to throw them open, only to struggle with the lock.
“W-what is this thing made of?” She whispered incredulously. “AJ! Can you help me?”
“Ah’m coming,” Applejack replied, leaving Twilight to examine the emptiness by herself.
The darkness was all-compassing, or so she could have sworn. Beyond the light of her horn, the shadows seemed to taunt her. It must have been her imagination, she told herself. If the house was empty, then there would be nothing to project shadow from in the first place.
Yet…
Her heart nearly stopped when she caught glimpse of a flashing green. However, as she was about to shout a warning, Applejack finally managed to break the lock down and open the windows wide. With light filling the house, Twilight was left to stare in puzzlement at an empty spot.
"T-this is... " She stopped, a shiver doing down her spine. It was different in the hut. The illness that had threatened her in the woods themselves had changed. Her mane was standing on its end from the air in there. "We shouldn’t stay here, girls. T-there was something... evil here, deeply evil."
Her breath hitched, as in her mind flashed the image of a mouth with fang. She blinked in shock, but the image had already disappeared. But a tingling sensation wouldn’t leave the tip of her horn, it lingered, as traces of magic would.
"I can hear... I can feel what it wanted..." She said, breathlessly.
All she could feel was a sickening weight in her chest, growing and twisting, reaching deeper into her with tendrils of illness. At once, her legs weakened, and she could have sworn her vision became misty.
“Twi!” Her friends rushed to her side.
“Twilight, are you alright?” Rainbow Dash asked urgently.
She wanted to answer with the affirmative, as truly it was uncomfortable but not overwhelming yet. However, as she opened her mouth, her horn felt hit by a bolt of lightning, searing with heat and pain. Heaving, she felt her wings contract madly.
"We shouldn't stay inside,” Twilight pushed the words through gritted teeth. “Zecora’s not here, and there’s no hint of where she’s disappeared to."
The other two mares shared a look, both frowning at the state of their friend.
“Rainbow, go take a look outside.” She pointed out at the door with one hoof. “See if it’s safe takin’ out Twi right now.”
Wasting no time, she disappeared in a rainbow blur, causing a miniature gust of wind to shake up her friends. Applejack might have glared at her, but at the moment, her immediate preoccupation was the pain Twilight seemed to be in.
So, it was with relief that she heard that same raspy voice echo back in the hut.
“The coast is clear, guys.”
“Good.” The orange mare nodded, before turning to her alicorn friend. “Twi, d’yeh think yer going to be able to walk the way back home? Should Ah carry yeh?”
“No, no… I’ll be fine.” She bit her lips, grimacing. “I just need to get out of here.”
“Then let’s go!”, came the brash shout, and their legs followed the order without question.
Once outside, the three of them stared at one another. A sense of restlessness ate at them. This expedition had not been fruitful so far. Amongst them, Twilight seemed to be the most concerned, as her eyes kept going toward the tree-house they had left.
“Well, what’s next?” Applejack tilted her hat over her face. “We’re not any closer to findin’ out what happened.”
Instead of answering, the young alicorn turned to face Zecora’s home again, this time with a look of determination.
“Huh…? Twilight?” Rainbow Dash asked, not sure of what was happening.
Closing her eyes, the sorceress took a deep breath. With her focus narrowing, she thought back on the sensation that had assaulted her, on the vanishing flash of light. Her mind remained on these specifics. Her surroundings had vanished, leaving her the lone figure in the face of chaotic silence.
No… it was not silence… She was simply focused elsewhere. Her friends were there, and it was another one of her friend that she was trying to find. Her help was needed, she had made a promise to her teacher and herself that she would do this, and she was going to.
Raw magic submerged her, and her eyes turned white.
Her two friends backed away a step or two as an aura of purple magic grew around the tree. Spreading as a gentle entity, Twilight’s magic grew, sparks of violet and black ignited into the light, but the light itself stretched once more, to capture them. Rainbow Dash and Applejack watched in fascination while the spell engulfed the house in its entirety and triggered more and more of these events.
Once it had reached its full extension, a tremor shook the aura from top to bottom, in a way not unlike a shiver, one that Twilight had seemed to feel as well. But before they had the time to digest that notion, they heard a faint roar that stirred at their memories. Heads snapping toward the house, they saw the magic recede, dragging along the spots of black into the mystical field. It shrunk and shrunk further, floating toward them all the while, until it became only a droplet, no bigger than a cherry.
“What was that all about?” Applejack eyed the small sphere with suspicion.
“It’s… it’s a sample of the magic that was left in here.” Twilight’s eyes narrowed on the dancing spots of black. “If I can crack its composition, I could be able to track its source with a spell.”
“Magic’s like… a scent?” Rainbow Dash said, exchanging unconvinced glances with both her friends.
Frowning, the orange mare tilted her head. “So we’re gonna track whatever’s did this like Winona finds her food?”
“I think that’s the closest analogy I could find, yes.” Twilight nodded. “All ponies can sense magic, but it’s usually unreliable unless there is some high levels of magic used on both ends.”
Letting her friend process the information, she was about to turn back toward Ponyville, when said friend was hit by a disturbing thought.
“Hey, d’ya think that’s what Pinkie’s doing?”
Twilight became very still, her eyes unnaturally wide and her smile absolutely frozen on her lips.
“Nope!” She said with overreacting enthusiasm. “I’m not dwelling on the Pinkie Sense, not now, not ever! EVER!”
Then, her gaze fell back on the orb she had decided to bring back with her. Her emotions settled down very quickly. Something about that magic… it was extremely familiar. It racked at her brain to see it, but she couldn’t place it. All she knew was that whatever it was made her feel nauseous with repulsion.
“The forest is very quiet, don’t you think?” The words came out first as an observation, but as she spoke them, her tone grew uncertain. “Why would that be?”
“Ah dunno, Twi.” The farm mare shrugged, giving the first idea that came to her mind, even if she didn’t believe it entirely. “’Cause all them critters are gone?”
But as she said it, Applejack saw her pegasus friend still. Thinking back on it, the scouting mission she had been given hadn’t really been useful for their little trip, had it? They hadn’t seen… anything…
Twilight let her gaze move from the clearing to the path they had come, occasionally stopping on some bushes or branches. Nothing moved, no sound came out.
“I think that might be the case.”
--
The plates fell into our sink, sending some soapy water flying around. I should have cared about that, but truly, it flew over my head. We had finished eating just moments ago and I was more or less feeling drained. I had put something together for our meal quickly, though even I was thinking it was a little subpar. Seeing as I was competing with a couple of royal chefs, that was not a big shocker.
At the very least, Tom had eaten without complaints.
Swooping everything from the table with some precise wind control, I put things to be washed later. I did not feel like doing all that much cleaning this evening. So, satisfied at the state of the kitchen, I left it behind, only to trip on a half torn piece of cardboard.
Where did this come from?
Puzzled, I looked to my right, only to see two boxes, with one of them opened and presumably emptied of its content, lying next to a bigger one.
“Calx, do you know wh-?” I asked, sending a glance toward the living room and only seeing an empty spot where I expected him to be. “Calx?”
I felt more than I heard his exalted breathing when he flew down the hallway, covered up in golden plates. As he landed with gusto, I felt my eyes grew wider and wider.
“Celestia sent us both sets of armor! You gotta try them on, they’re awesome!” He shouted and reared on his hind legs, grinning from ear to ear at the idea of wearing something so badass. “For the glory of the Solar Empire!”
And on that simple declaration of badassitude, he ran past me with the whole set of armor, shouting war cries toward whatever poor soul he would find in that state of mind.
I did not need to turn around, not even for a measly second, to know where this was going. Mere seconds before he had declared the awesomeness of his new armor, a strong noise rippled through me, making me sigh in exasperation.
“Tom!” I shouted.
“C-crap!”
Ears twitching, I sent a withering glare in his direction. “That was the bathroom, wasn’t it?”
“Huh… ” A little blue head, half hidden by a golden helmet he tried to lift with his magic, emerged from a room at the end of the hallway. On his face was the sheepish smile to end all sheepish smiles. “Have you ever thought about how little guys actually need a functioning bath?”
Instantly, it was as if the events of the day had caught up with me. My head fell, heavier than ever as I just took a few instants to digest the fact that I had yet another thing to fix for tomorrow. For the Elders’ sake, couldn’t things just be uneventful and quiet for even an hour?!
As if I didn’t have enough things on my plate!
Throughout my silent ranting, my little brother had stayed very still and as unnoticeable as he could make himself, recognizing the signs of a punishment in the making. Just like I had taught him, the less of a fuss he made before, during and after, the shorter it would be. It worked with me, Mom and Dad, so that was a tested concept.
“Tom…” I started, with a tone dry enough to evaporate a lake.
But I could not complete my statement. With that word alone, Calx had shrunken on himself pitifully and I felt my heart contract painfully at the sight.
In his flinch and his eyes, I saw the promise of a good time disappearing fast. After much suffering today, he knew that he was not going to get the reprise he had hoped, all because he had been too excitable with a gift from our cousin. And it had hit him right where it hurts.
Ears flat against his skull, he looked on the verge of tears, yet was fighting the inevitable with all his might.
“But even if I had a horrible day, that was not right of me, Rumble! I’m sorry!”
Lowering my gaze to the ground, I felt a grimace twist my mouth. If I had said anything there, it would have been harsher than necessary…
Angrily, I chastised myself. Come on, give him something, Sam! School can’t have been fun, and then he had to sit by himself in the hospital’s waiting room! And then he had to also wait for us to enter Thunderlane’s room! Of course, he’s going to be antsy and careless! It’s not always about you and your troubles!
Taking a deep breath, I mercilessly squashed the blots of anger tainting my mind. Tartarus be damned, I was not going to take it out on him!
No, instead…
I reappeared behind him, wings flared into extension. Calx reacted predictably; by turning around so quickly he almost lost balance. His eyes darted behind me, toward the damage done, but I resolved not to even glance that way.
Crouched down to his level, a playful evil grin on my face, I deliberately butted head with him. Not too strongly – we both had a horn, after all –, just enough to give him a startling little push. “So, what would you say, little squirt, if we were to make a deal?”
“Huuuh…” It seemed like his brain hadn’t caught up with my sudden appearance, in part due to a very likely fear of retribution. The change of tone hadn’t quite yet registered either. His gaze had simply gone toward the exit, as he obviously contemplated how much he needed to run away from me and how far was a safe distance. “What kind of deal?”
Still grinning, I bumped his muzzle playfully with one hoof. “We forget this whole mess. You get to stay up past normal bedtime. We get to do something fun. And, maybe, if it’s not too late by then, we order some sort of treats and eat them in the living room with some comic books.”
He blinked. Slowly.
“In return, you behave. For real.” We stared at one another, with complete serious from my part. “That means no fuss tomorrow morning, even if it’s the weekend, and you try your best in school from now on, even if it’s more boring than listening to great auntie Lexia. Tomorrow, we’re cleaning the bathroom together. If Twilight comes around to help you with school, you’re polite and well-behaved. That’s what it means, deal?”
By his look alone, I would guess it was Hearth’s Warming Eve. Gone was the horror and sadness. His grin stretched from one ear to the other.
“Hay yeah!” He shouted, his wings buzzing with excitement at the prospect of finally getting to do something real fun.
“And no more playing with armors near breakable stuff,” I added before it was too late.
“’Kay!” He agreed nonchalantly, with a half grin, which meant he probably wouldn’t be trying to keep up that one too hard.
Meh, good enough.
“Then, let’s start things up, lil’ bro.” I grinned, making my horn glow with magic. “Last to reach the couch loses.”
That’s all it took to get him barreling for the living room.
Stretching my neck and my wings, causing a few cracking noises along the way, I let out a dark chuckle. Time to bring on the big brother guns again.
But, before I fully focused my attention on him, I allowed myself one stray thought, or rather, one rogue threat I projected toward the throne room of Canterlot. With my gaze fixed on our exploded bath, I uttered one ominous statement. “You realize, of course, that this means war, Celly.”
--
Quite honestly, Blueblood would later admit to being extremely startled by the passing smugness of Princess Celestia’s smile. Her cup had hovered near her lips for a few seconds longer than they should have, and in the split moment before she took one more sip of tea, a playful superiority had seeped out of every pore of her body.
More importantly, he didn’t have the slightest idea what could have provoked such a reaction when they were only enjoying a few slices of cake at a café!
--
“Get out.”
“N-no! Please, you just have to listen to me!”
“I’m not repeating.”
“B-but I’m not lying!”
“Leave…”
--
I was in a strange place, of silence and mirrors. Alone in a crowd, wherever I looked, there were no sound. Wherever I heard, there were only ponies of all kinds, some vaguely familiar. Every single one of them had a golden yellow coat. All of their manes were pale as snow.
Hooves stomped against the non-existent ground, in unison. No steps made a single sound. Silence surrounded me. For some reason though, I was the only one moving, and something pushed me to never stay still.
I passed by a bulky unicorn, of similar height. For some reason, my steps became faster when I came close to him, as if I didn’t want to look at him further. Perhaps the feeling had been mutual, as the stallion turned his head in a huff.
I passed by more ponies, mares, foals and stallions. None of them were the same, but all of them resembled me. And none of them were saying a word.
“P-… tus…”
Slowly, I turned and scanned my surroundings. But whereas the rest of the world was a lone reflective surface, in the direction I looked, there was only a spot of pitch black nothingness. And from it, a fresh breeze came, brushing against my fur. So, tentatively, with a single hoof, I reached forward and the dream broke.
Instantly, my senses became blurry, as I was no longer standing, but lying on my right side. I could not see anything anymore; my eyelids were heavy, unmovable.
My mind hazy, I vaguely felt a weight over my folded left wing. Pain shot up to my brain from that spot as well, my muscles ached from the uncomfortable position. Still, nothing came to my mind until the weight moved, pushing against me in a rhythm that I knew by heart.
Half-amused, half-fond, I opened an eye, glancing at Calx with a smirk. At some point, our game night had gone horribly right.
Stretching a leg, I heard a scrunching noise of paper rustling and felt a cool contact against that same limb. With a glance toward the disturbance, I made out the shape and colors of a familiar object, of a story told with pictures and text bubbles.
Maybe falling asleep in the middle of the room, right next to the comic books, hadn’t been the brightest way to handle tiredness, but when we were getting to the duel between the Mare of Steel and Brainiac, doing anything but read further hadn’t even been an option.
Why did I wake up?
Scanning the room, I saw nothing out of the usual, except the spectacular mess we had made of the living room. Nothing that warranted waking up, really.
“P-Prince V-Ventus…”
Blinking, I glanced around once more.
I know that voice…
“Violet?”
A sound akin to a mouse squeak came to my attention, and I could easily imagine the little filly being quite shocked that my previous promise had been literal.
“What is it?” I asked softly, toning it down to a whisper only she could hear.
She did not answer. I waited in silence for her to speak up, and soon started to fear she might not talk to me at all. I knew she had been desperate, it was obvious just hearing her!
A wave of relief crashed into me when she finally spoke up.
“I… I’m sorry!” Her tone grew higher pitch still, pulling at a string around my heart. “I didn’t mean to bother you in the middle of the night.”
“Don’t worry about that,” I told her, trying to convey the same indulgence Celly showed her subjects. “Is something wrong?”
“S-somepony said that you were gone. That you had made the Princesses angry and that they had banished you away…”
My heart fell. T-that poor filly, after what she’d gone through already… had she thought it would happen again so soon?
“They were wrong, Violet.” I subconsciously glanced at Calx, feeling a pinch of pain from the sorrow in her voice. “I’m just away from Canterlot for a little while.”
“I was scared you might… y-you might…” Sobs started to break through the flow of her sentences, and I felt a heavy regret at being so far away from that crying foal. “You might have left me… l-like M-Mom and Dad…”
Oh Violet…
“I wouldn’t leave you alone like that,” I said with a gentle tone. “I promised that I would be there if you needed me, didn’t I?”
Breathing deeply, I stretched my consciousness through the air. I saw the town, disappearing behind me, behind the grassy fields and the train track, behind the frosty mountains top and the coursing river, until I was above, around and in Canterlot again. A city I had never left lay sleeping in my grasp.
Voices came more strongly here than they did in Ponyville. The night was still buzzing with activity, as many adults trotted in the streets, going on about their businesses as easily as others did during the day.
For a split second, I felt a pinch of joy. Good for you, Luna.
Quickly, however, I sobered up, knowing that the object of my current quest was close. As a gust of wind, I slipped through the houses of stone, evolving through the streets as I followed the breathing of the filly I sought. Soon, I was by the Star Covent, and entered silently through the upmost window.
My instinct hadn’t lied to me, this was the dormitory and I caught sight of the cyan filly that had called me.
Violet was lying in her bed, her eyes reddened by her tears. Darkened trails of fur smeared her face. She was looking up blankly at the ceiling, hooves hovering just above her chest.
“I’m here, Violet. Just like I said I would.”
Her legs sprung, encircling an empty pocket of air. Reflexively, I forced the material of that same spot to change, until it became similar to my body of flesh. With a soft gasp, she looked up, through the form she could feel.
“Prince Ventus?” She asked in the quietest whisper. “I’m sorry… I couldn’t sleep. I-it just hurts tonight.”
“There, there…” I ran circles in her back with a warm breeze. “Would you like me to sing you a song?”
Buck, do I even know one? I thought to myself with dismay.
My first reflex was to send a few frantic looks around myself, as if the inspiration would strike me so easily. What I had hoped to somehow find was not amongst the sad, barren room. It was not part of the low ceiling and its wooden beams, not within the dusty shelves, nor the orphanage itself I suspected. On the other hand, I did find something to push me more strongly into this endeavor.
Foals.
Of course. Violet lived in an orphanage, after all. Who else would be here, but the other foals that shared this bleak past? How many of them even had the chance to know of their parents? How many of them would ever be adopted by some kindhearted soul?
With a soft push, I made the filly lie down in bed again, then replaced the sheets over her. A shiver made her jolt, and the poor thing curled up on herself more.
I’m sorry, Violet, but this one is not going to be yours alone…
The little filly jumped when a blanket of invisible feathers fell on her. After the surprise had passed, she allowed herself to relax.
“I’m still here, Violet.” Another breeze brushed against her mane softly, and her eyelids started falling down. “Just listen to my voice, okay?”
Gently, she nodded, leaning into the touch she craved for so badly. With a heavier heart, eyes closed, reaching deep inside me, I listened. I listened to the calls of the little ones, from here and further beyond.
Moans of fears from little foals that batted away at their nightmares. Silent sobs from saddened children. Unsteady breathing and squirming in the cold of night.
Inside of me, a restraint broke.
And I went to their sides, all of them.
Foals, calves, chicks, puppies, fawns, dragon hatchlings; the list grew and kept growing. I was by their sides, as even the faintest wind, just so they could hear me this one time.
Slowly, letting the power build up within my chest, I hummed a low beat. I knew not its true origin, but a song started to appear in my mind. A light bathed down my thoughts, pushing me forward, onward, with more strength than I thought I possessed.
Within me, all I could see were memories of the past, tangled between two ages and lives, both lost, equally out of reach to me. Longing tainted each and every one of them, bringing down my heart, weighting it down. Yet, the presence of this filly next to me, calling for my help, helped me push back the pain until I was left with only this distant sadness next to my brotherly and fatherly instincts.
The words came to me.
~ Hush now, quiet now,
It’s time to lay your sleepy head,
Hush now, quiet now,
It’s time for you to go to bed…
When you wake, you will see
All the other foals as your friends
Pegasi, unicorns and earth ponies
Together to the very end ~
Households by the thousands flashed before my eyes, each one of them holding the recipients of my song, each one of them receiving this small gift in the hope it would help them fight back their inner demons, each one of them I offered the comfort of a gentle wind by their sides.
~ Hush now, quiet now,
It’s time to lay your sleepy head,
Hush now, quiet now,
It’s time for you to go to bed…
When you wake, you will see
The sadness gone,
with the rising sun,
And you will be happy. ~
I went on for several minutes, letting my voice rumble deep and clear into as soothing as a sound I could muster. As close to a father’s voice I could create. As close to one as I could remember myself.
An invisible hand gripped at my heart, bringing a burning sensation into my eyes. I feared my voice would falter, but it did not. I wanted this to be what they needed. Its costs to myself were irrelevant!
“…And you will be happy,” I sang the last verse, with a hint of defiance to those dark whispers in my mind.
I did it… I thought, looking to the filly that had brought this on.
Violet’s eyes were closed, her entire being expressing naught but a peaceful rest. Leaning closer, I felt her breathing, calmly and steadily. She was smiling.
With one last brush of her mane and a small kiss on her forehead, I let go of my focus.
Still lying on my side, in the middle of a mess in our living room, things were the same as ever here. The muscles in my wing were still dead, but my mind was hazier than I remembered. A great fatigue was dulling my senses.
Gently, I moved my wing from under Calx to over his sleeping body, not caring that I was breaking the illusion spell. His rest remained uninterrupted, and I took a minute to just look at him, my chest warming up with my love for my little brat of a brother.
He had not even woken up through my lullaby. Go figures.
“Goodnight,” I whispered toward the foals.
A few of them even answered, through half-asleep words and the sound of them shifting under their covers.
Satisfied, I let my consciousness drift away for the rest of the night.