//------------------------------//
// Chapter 17: Clocks, Carousing, & Castles 
// Story: Destiny's Call: The tales of a foreigner in a familiar land 
// by Zenith Starwalker 
//------------------------------//

	I awoke before the crack of dawn to get an early start on my second day at the farm. Normally, I was adept enough at being roused by my own circadian rhythm, so as a result I was not prepared for the sudden noise of an old key wound alarm clock ringing away and assaulting my ears drums like a hyperactive percussionist on speed. The excruciating noise made me roll my pillow over my head as I tried to silence it by slamming my hand on the nightstand next to the bed. I may have put a little too much force into it because the next sound I heard was the loud metallic crunching of busted gears and cogs as the incessant ringing finally died with a last pathetic whimper. I chuckled victoriously before settling in for five more minutes of sleep. 

Then the realization of what I did finally caught up to me and my eyes snapped open, I sprung out of bed and scrambled to my feet to observe the results of my careless action. The alarm clock lay flattened into a pathetic crumpled heap of broken metal and shattered glass atop the simple wooden nightstand. As I brought my hands to the side of my head in stunned horror, a spring chose that moment to burst out of a fracture in the frame with a small ‘doinging’ sound and roll onto the floor. I would have found it comical had I not been currently having a miniature panic attack over the very much broken device. 

‘Crap! What if that was a precious family heirloom or something? Sometimes my ridiculously augmented strength can be more of a burden than a blessing’ 

“The broken clock is a comfort my ass” I muttered to myself as I collected all of the loose parts, Lifehouse lied to me!

I almost jumped out of my skin when I heard a series of knocks on my door, Applejack’s voice piped in with a minutely concerned tone.

“Are ya alright in there Zenith? I thought ah heard a ruckus comin’ from in there” 

“Just fine Applejack!” I hollered back, erasing all hints of worry in my voice and concurrently working on a plan to fix this little mess I had inadvertently created for myself. 

“If you say so, breakfast’s in ten so get yer keister downstairs before then ok?” She didn’t sound suspicious so that was a good sign.

“Sure thing boss!” I cheerily replied (or about as cheery as a monotonous person like me comes close to).

The shadow that she casted beneath the door that was illuminated by the Sun’s first rays lingered for a few seconds longer before slowly shifting away back to whence it came. I allowed myself a half relieved, half disgruntled sigh and shook my head, this was going to be another one those days it seemed…

An idea emerged from the foggy darkness of my still groggy mind and shone with sparkling brilliance. Using the (rather generous) weekly stipend of five hundred bits provided courtesy of the Royal Sisters, I could simply go into town and find a clockmaker’s shop to get it repaired in secret, or failing that, get an identical replacement (from what I could tell it was an ordinary wind up clock). I might even tip extra munificently if they had the good grace to keep it under wraps. I could then bring it back with no one the wiser and avoid a potentially awkward conversation over how I managed to trash one of the Apple family’s timepieces. 

I fully registered that this little scheme of mine was a far cry from being honest, but I was adamant about keeping my standing as a Trifect strictly between the element bearers and myself. Applejack might understand, but she might have me fess up to the rest of her family and I wouldn’t risk it. I speedily scrounged through the many drawers in the room in search of something to bag the metallic debris with, finding it in the form of a small burlap sack that smelled faintly of old coffee beans. 

After I finished collecting and storing all of the evidence that linked me to the crime, I began brooding over why the hell anybody would just set an alarm clock next to my bed and fail to inform me about it. I mean… I doubt it would have done much to change the outcome, but it would have been nice to know. Perhaps I was being unfair, while I bet that the Apples are accustomed to being early risers, they might often have people who stay over who are the opposite. I did still feel a little miffed that they just assumed the latter of me and didn’t even bother asking for my opinion on it before planting a primed timepiece right next to my head. I huffed in irritation and put away the sack before I made for the bathroom to get my mind on other things, I was most grateful that the Apple family home wasn’t one of those places where people had to contest each other in order to get first dibs on the washroom. I gargled some apple flavored mouthwash (what else would you expect to find in their cabinets?) before taking care of my other hygiene oriented necessities.

I emerged from the restroom feeling fresh as a daisy in the spring before changing into some jeans and donning another one of my favored non-sequitur shirts before exiting out the door. As per usual, I had efficiently finished up my wake up regimen with not a moment to spare as I strode down the hallway and towards the stairs. As I did so I noticed that each of the doorways were creaked open but not opened all the way, out of the corners of my eyes I spotted each member of the Apple siblings in various stages of their own morning routine while I passed on by. Applejack was midway between trading her apple themed pajamas for her usual cow girl attire (I turned away hastily, dang did she cut a nice figure), Apple bloom was sluggishly brushing her teeth based on the reflection in her bathroom mirror, and the currently shirtless Macintosh (man was that guy ripped) looked deep in thought over whether to choose the checkered shirt with black and red coloration or an equally reddish tank top. 

I idly wondered why they wouldn’t shut their own doors to give themselves a little privacy from prying eyes when the answer slowly became clear to me; they were a close knit family, meaning that they had nothing to hide from each other in any way, shape, or form. Being unaccustomed to seeing such things, I was understandably befuddled by this, although being a naturally more reserved person made that an inevitability anyway.

I quietly crept down the stairway in search of the kitchen; already I could hear the sounds of cooking occurring and the crisp smell of toast drifting along the air. The sudden stimulation of my olfactory senses caused my stomach to churn and grumble in protest for having been denied food for nearly half a day. My ever sarcastic inner voice did a quick analysis of the situation before getting back to me with the results.

‘I have made my diagnosis! You sir have rumblies in your tumblies, I recommend remedying that with a hearty dosage of good ol’ country style breakfast’

As much as I wanted to roll my eyes at my own antics, I had to agree with the suggestion. Entering the kitchen I spied an unusually awake and frisky Granny Smith managing between a diversity of fried vittles on the stove, toast inside an ordinary appearing toaster (that was even plugged into the wall!), and an arrangement of drink glasses waiting to be filled with both orange juice, dairy, and strangely enough, tea. Despite her age, old Annabelle was remarkably spry for someone so wrinkly looking. Now don’t get me wrong; I have nothing but tons of respect for the elderly, but I’ve come to almost always expect them to be senile in all aspects of their slowing waning lives. To see Granny Smith up and about so early and fixing her grandchildren (and me) breakfast without so much as a hiccup was both unexpected and profoundly heartwarming at the same time. 

Just watching the grand matron of the house painstakingly prepare food for her family brought back some bygone memories of when I was a younger lad and my maternal grandmother made for me the most scrumptious and delicious tasting breakfast every time I paid her a visit (reasonably sure the secret ingredient she used was love). If I were a more emotionally affected person, I’m sure a nostalgic tear would have made its way down my cheek. The closest that I have ever been to shedding sentimental tears was watching the ending of Toy Story three, and that only managed to make my eyes slightly misty (while the guy sitting near to me was bawling loudly, it made for quite the contrast). 

I decided to ease my way into her vision so I wouldn’t startle her or be mistakenly identified as a stranger that needed a frying pan applied to the face, I couldn’t have been too careful after all right? Turns out Granny still retained an acute awareness of her surroundings, evidenced by her addressing me without batting an eye.

“There’s no need to be walkin’ on eggshells around me youngin’. I ain’t doddery yet” Her voice wasn’t as a hoary as I’d remembered her equine counterpart’s to be, something that mystified me greatly. Instead there was a fully cognizant wisdom underlying them that made her seem more grizzled than kooky.

I snapped to a full upright posture at being discovered, “My apologies, it’s just that I like to tread lightly around someone wielding something with a flat and heated surface” I was referring to the small pan she was using to prepare some eggs, sunny side up from the looks of it.

“You ‘Fraid I might conk you on the noggin with it?” She let out a chuckle, “If I were to do that, ah’d use the cast iron skillet, and only if you were hankerin’ for it” That didn’t make me feel any better.

She briefly gestured to the table, “Please, make yerself comfy. Ah’m almost finished here”

“I could help if you wanted?” I politely offered; it was almost instinctual of me to render aid whenever I could at this point in my life.

“Nah, if any more of you start takin’ up all of the responsibilities round here, ah’d be officially put out to pasture wouldn’t I?” She asked with a brow raised in my direction.

‘Well, at least I offered’ I shrugged and randomly picked a spot at the large oaken table covered with a somewhat jejune plaid tablecloth, I did not sit at either end since I was guessing that it was still a tradition here for the matriarch and the man of the household to occupy those positions. 

So alternatively, I got comfy on the side of the table that was facing a wall that was positively decorated with old family photos, many of which depicting a much younger Applejack and Big Macintosh (although he was quite scrawny back then) during various highlights of their young lives. One had an ecstatic looking Applejack showcasing her characteristic Mana mark to the person holding the camera with a smiling Granny Smith and Mac sharing in her joy in the background. I abruptly realized that the person holding the camera had to have been one of Applejack’s parents, for the subsequent photographs were missing Granny Smith; and both Applejack and Macintosh had more subdued expressions on them. Like they were still trying their best to be happy, but something important was now absent from their lives. If I wasn’t mistaken, that was likely the beginning of Mac’s stoicism.

“Based on that funny look on yer face, ah can see that you pieced it together for yerself” Granny Smith astutely observed, serving me a plate filled to the brim with tasty chow before setting the rest of the table. She then sat across from me, contrary to what I had first expected of seating etiquette.

“I’m…so sorry for your loss” I glanced back down to the table, not wanting to provoke any more painful memories for the elderly woman.

“Don’t be, the time for grieving is long since passed. Besides, they’re in a better place, watching over us as we speak even now” She glanced up at the ceiling, a wistful smile gracing her aged features.

‘Well that confirms that this family strongly believes in the hereafter’ I mused, fully knowing how the death of a loved one can make you ponder these things in great depth.

“Does Apple bloom know what happened to her parents? From what I can gather, she was still an infant when they passed away” From the looks of things, it may have even been the year that she was born.

She shook her head ruefully, “She hasn’t been told nor has she ever asked, though ah suspect she has a pretty good idear why they ain’t around no more”

Deciding that it was better to change topics to something less cheerless, I chose to compliment her good cooking after taking a satisfying bite…or maybe several, I couldn’t really control myself after the first sampling. I wasn’t instantly berated for impulsively stuffing my maw before everyone else arrived to the table so that was a plus.

“Wow, I think that might just be the second most invigorating breakfast I’ve ever had. You’re an amazing cook Mrs. Smith”

“None of that formal nonsense ‘round here young whippersnapper, ah told ya to call me granny like everybody else does” She chided with a wag of her hand.

“You must forgive me once more, I am unused to referring to someone I only met yesterday by the title of grandmother” I excused, not wanting to come off as rude but not readily accepting her by family honorific either.

“Well, I suppose I can come off a bit too strong sometimes. Jus’ so used to bein’ recognized as everyone’s granny that I musta’ gotten inclined to it” 

She leaned closer to me and spoke in a conspiratorial tone, “Tell ya what, how ‘bout we compromise then, I’ll let ya call me Mrs. Smith around others but in private you can just refer to me as Annabelle hmm?”

“That sounds most agreeable…Annabelle” She cracked a wry grin at my acquiescence.

I polished off the rest of my plate in short order and was thoroughly gratified that Annabelle had the presence of mind to cook with second servings taken into consideration. By now the other members of the Apple family had arrived and taken their seats in anticipation for some wholesome nourishment. Big Macintosh and Applejack took the ends while a hyperactive Apple bloom sat next to me (much to my consternation) and flooded me with an impressive deluge of random questions. Only this time Big Mac had no intention of rescuing me; as occupied as he was with shoveling down his allotment of grub and being his usual quiet self. Applejack and Granny Smith sat idly by and smirked at what they found as an amusing display. I did my best to resist putting my head in my hands and groaning in exasperation as the little girl with a red bowtie in her hair continued to pester me.

“…What’s the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?...” She gasped as though she had the epiphany of a lifetime, “Hey mister! Mister! Can ah see yer Mana mark?”

‘Oh boy, there’s a question I’ve been dreading’ 

“I’m not so sure that you’ll like what you see” I sedately replied, shifting uncomfortably in my seat.

“Ah promise I won’t make fun a’ ya! C’mon show us!” Apple bloom pressured me, rattling the chair she was on with her movements.

I sighed in begrudging acceptance, “Very well, but try not to overreact ok?” She nodded furiously, a hopeful curl bending the edges of her lips upward.

Seeing that there was no skirting around the question since everyone at the table now had their eyes on me in uniform curiosity, I decided to bite the bullet and lift up my right shirt sleeve and show them that it was as bare as the day I was born. Predictably, this received muted gasps from both Mrs. Smith and Applejack; a raised brow from Macintosh, and Apple bloom… just stared at it, her face not betraying her inner thoughts in the slightest. When she did finally react however, her eyes rolled back into her head and she face planted on the table… right into her unfinished breakfast, causing parts of her hair to become matted with grease and chunks of leftover food.

“I’m pretty sure that qualifies as an overreaction” I dryly remarked, already regretting not deflecting the inquiry or just simply lying until my tongue turned black.

“Apple bloom!” Applejack jumped out of her chair and circled the table to attend to her woozy sister who was just coming to.

“Oh… Applejack, I just had the most horrific daydream. I asked that Zenith fella to show me his Mana mark an’ his shoulders were blank!”

I leaned over and whispered into her ear, “That was no dream. And didn’t you agree not to overreact?” She yelped in surprise and drew back from me, shakily pointing at my exposed shoulder like it was a sign of the end times.

“He’s missin’ a Mana mark! How’s that even possible?” She looked up at her visibly concerned sister, “Didn’t ya tell me that everyone eventually discovers theirs by the time they’re his age?” Applejack was too stunned herself to answer.

She began to grow more hysterical the longer she thought about it, “What if ah never discover mine!? What if ah’m doomed to be a bland hand and talentless like him forever!?”

“Apple bloom! That’s no way to treat our guest, you were raised better than that!” Granny Smith chided her for the insensitive outburst; I intervened before the situation could become any more inane.

“Relax Apple bloom. Trust me, not having a Mana mark even at my age is unique to me and me alone ('Or I think it is, can’t be too certain'). You can count on finding yours some time in the future” She hesitantly seemed to calm down, at the very least she wasn’t hyperventilating anymore. She looked back at me, this time there was some sadness reflected in her eyes.

“But what about you? Don’t it bother ya how you might never find out what yer destiny is?”

I scoffed, “A mark designating one’s special talent is one thing, but your destiny is another thing entirely” I pulled my sleeve down and leaned back into my chair before crossing my arms, “Besides, I like it better this way”

The blank look on little Apple bloom’s face was just precious, like the idea of someone not wanting to have some glorified tattoo reminding them what their calling (and by extension their lot in life as well) was permanently engraved on their skin simply did not compute. If comedic effect was actively in effect, I’m pretty sure there would be smoke and fizzling sparks erupting out of her ears right now. Entertaining as this all was, it did raise some very important questions over just how relevant the concept of determinism and free will was here. Presumably every Arcanian in the land would one day happen upon and fully realize what their special talent was, and I’m assuming that they would also have no second thoughts about it either. So that meant that these Mana marks coincided with a person’s passions entirely, an errant thought regarding a certain dressmaker who I had yet to visit popped into my head and provided me with the material I needed to make my point across to the currently malfunctioning Applebot.

“Think about it this way, Mrs. Rarity’s Mana mark depicts a trio of diamonds yes?” She nodded, showing that she was paying attention, “So I presume that she has some special ability that has something to do with gemstones yeah?” 

“Eeyup, she’s got some fancy smancy spell that allows her to track down gems” Applejack confirmed for me.

“But do you see her mining shiny rocks for a living?” Apple bloom slowly shook her head, my point gradually worming its way into her brain.

“Exactly, she’s a fashionista! A woman who dedicates her ideas and inspiration into designing haute couture for the masses. And if the dressy snobs back in Concordia are anything to go by, she’s quite successful with crafting things that, ‘if you’ll pardon the expression’ rich people buy up like its going out of style. She’s living proof that while your Mana mark is a satisfying thing to have, it does not dictate your chosen path in life. 

No…Apple bloom, that is entirely up to you” A quote by a poet back home rung in my mind: ‘Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself’ and it felt even more pertinent here.

My discourse seemed to have had a sobering effect on the young girl, who looked deep in thought over what I had elaborated for her. She then tilted her head to the side and commented in confusion.

“Ah still don’t understand”

‘Or maybe it didn’t’ I mentally face palmed.

I dismissed the topic with a wave of my hand, “Like I said, you’ll find out for yourself given time” I turned my attention to her big sister, “What’s the agenda for today boss? We working the fields again?” I asked.

“Stop callin’ me boss, ya ain’t been formally hired remember? And not today, Saturday is a market day. So you’ll be helpin’ me sell some of our produce instead…and stuff” 

Her eyes darted from side to side near the end, alerting me to an ulterior motive, one I already had a faint suspicion of. This was good though, it meant that I didn’t have to make up a reason of my own to go into town and get the broken clock squared away with. We spent the remainder of breakfast eating in silence, Apple bloom occasionally sneaking glances in my direction; no doubt still trying to process what I had told her and doing her darnedest to make heads or tails of it. The other members of the table were also sparingly shooting spying looks at me and I could see the cloudy unasked questions formulate behind their eyes; just who was I to be such a strange deviation from what they believed to be a normal Arcanian? The short answer was that I wasn’t, but I wasn’t quite ready to tell them that yet.

After breakfast was over and everyone had their fill, we cleaned up and Applejack instructed for me to meet her outside while she retrieved Clyde and Dale and hooked them up to the wagon that we’d be using to haul our cargo to market with. I used the lull to run upstairs and grab the bag with the shattered clock fragments and some of my other belongings before returning to the front porch and proceeding to whistle Dixie while I waited. Soon enough, Applejack pulled up with a wagon loaded to the brim with an assortment of apple bushels, plump looking pumpkins, fresh ears of corn and other prize crops harvested right from the fertile soils of the fields. I climbed aboard and got comfy while Applejack drove us forward with a whip of the reins, the strong steeds letting out a soft nicker of air prior to complying. I was content to just ride it out to Magiville in complete quietude, but Applejack felt it necessary to fill the air with her thoughts.

“So ya feel completely fine without yer Mana mark huh?”

“I do” I brusquely replied, feeling vaguely annoyed with where she was going with this.

“Can’t say I ever met somebody who would, what are ya? Too good to be like all the other folks?” She poked at me with a flat tone and wry expression.

“Nah, I’m just being me… the spirit of non conformity” I drolly declared, looking her in the eye with casual indifference. 

She snorted and pulled at the peak of her hat, “Whatever ya say… so when are you gonna apologize ta’ poor Golden Harvest?” She unexpectedly asked.

“Sometime this week, I’m still mulling over how to approach the whole thing”

“What’s so complicated? Jus’ go up to her, explain what happened, an’ pray that she’ll find it in her heart to forgive you. Heck, her place ain’t even a stone’s throw away from our farm” She explained, her up front and honest personal standpoint being especially prominent.

I shot her an incredulous look, “That might be well and good for you Applejack, but I’m not exactly a person who’s direct all the time, sometimes I have to handle a delicate situation with careful discretion and planning”

She looked at me with a stern expression, “Listen here pardner, I don’t how it is wherever you came from, but round here people hold themselves to a modes’ modicum of honesty. What yer tellin’ me sounds a hair’s breadth away from chicanery, somethin’ I don’t particularly care for”

I heaved a sigh, a part of me knowing that this conversation was unavoidable, “Applejack, I grew up in an environment where it’s considered honorable to be truthful, but not to be so liberal with it. I can think of multiple different situations where blunt honesty is more likely to further deteriorate a situation than fix it. I’m working on a game plan to be both honest with Golden Harvest about what happened that night, while also showing her that I’m sincerely going to make it up to her, but I can’t just flat out tell her that it was me that scared the bejeezus of out her without cushioning the blow a little first” 

That and I didn’t want to have to explain to her just who I was, but Applejack didn’t need to know that, nor did she need to know that I had an extremely questionable memory altering spell prepared if this went to hell in a hand basket. Strangely enough, I picked it up while reading one of Twilight’s books in her tower (presumably the same one that taught her the ‘want it, need it’ mind altering charm). The title was ‘Free won’t: A study into the effects of thaumaturgy on the mind’ why Celestia would even allow Twilight to have that book was beyond me, the spells contained inside came very close to violating the right to free will…but only just, it was mostly just spells with intense powers of suggestion and the planting of ideas that seemed like they were the original thoughts of the person. 

Additionally, by reading this risqué material, I learned how to best counter such spells if they were ever used on me. I was already mostly covered anyway, my natural tendency to follow my own way instead of going with the flow along with my airtight stubbornness meant most mind altering spells would simply bounce off my thick skull. Those spells powerful enough to get through would become mired in a multilayered defense consisting of my refined sense of self-identification, natural magic resistance afforded to me by my new physiology, and any counter spells that I’ve soaked up in my endless quest to become all powerful (well…maybe not the last part so much, I had already put myself on Stu alert to be safe). I shook my head; I was getting off track here. Applejack didn’t look all that happy that I was going against her wishes, but she wasn’t the one who had to confess to accidentally traumatizing a girl either.

“I promise you Applejack, I don’t intend to skip out on putting things right with Carrot top. I will keep my word, believe me” She searched my eyes for any hint of deceit before returning to steering us down the dirt road towards town.

She looked like she wanted to say something else, but thankfully kept to herself for the rest of the ride. It was a lovely day though, the birds were flying overhead, the sun was shining down radiantly as always, and the air had a crispness to it that made one feel alive and inspired. In the distance, I spotted multiple Valkyrians flitting about and moving fluffy white clouds in pattern like positions all over Magiville. This raised a few questions regarding how they scheduled the weather forecasts to coincide with growing and harvesting seasons or why they would even bother scheduling something like winter in the first place, but I saved them until my company was decidedly more Skyborn in origin.





Before long we were rolling into the peaceful town, those who were milling about the fringes of Magiville paused whatever it was they were doing at the time to take a gander at our healthy and organic cargo. It may have been my overactive imagination, but if my eyes weren’t deceiving me, more than a few of them licked their lips at the sight of those sweet and juicy apples grown specialty of their local Sweet Apple Acres. Of course, more than a few of the ladies were also staring at me and chattering amongst themselves; giggling as they did so. I was tempted to cloak myself out of sheer discomfiture alone, I couldn’t understand what was going through their heads and I doubt I ever would. The feminine thought process was a mystery not worth the effort of solving in my opinion, but what do I know? I certainly didn’t miss the amused smirk on Applejack’s face to my unease, I clenched my teeth and did my best to ignore that feeling of malaise that settled in my gut every time I felt that people were observing me.

The Magiville market was hosted right next to the town hall, where there was a decent amount of open space to peddle a panoply of wares ranging from edible produce to even metal tools and other merchandise. There was a fair mix of local growers setting up temporary stands to advertise their stock to the general populace and more permanent tents that were themed to give people an idea of what commodities they offered. I had a pretty good hunch that the tent shaped like a jester’s cap was the prank store where Rainbow Dash and Pinkie bought most of their gag paraphernalia. There was another building shaped like the small and large humps of a camel that had a unique styling to its thatched roof which made it look like a head of hair, I could only theorize that it was the local barbers slash salon and filed it’s location away for future reference.

Since we were among the first one’s to arrive, we got first choice in real estate for our stall. Applejack picked a good spot that was close to one of the roads leading in and out of town center, so those coming to and fro would undoubtedly see us and perhaps pay a visit before paying for some delicious apples. We quickly erected the simple wooden apple themed stand and sat back to watch all of the other vendors set up shop. As if fate itself were mocking me, the next marketer to arrive was Golden Harvest, looking decidedly dour on a small single seat cart being pulled by a palomino horse. I felt an elbow roughly nudge me in the ribs and I twisted to see Applejack nod pointedly in her direction.

“This is not the time to act Applejack, now is the time to focus on the job at hand” I calmly asserted as I sidestepped the issue.

‘While I use this convenient opportunity to survey and make notations’ I secretly schemed, while I mentally steepled my hands and chuckled fiendishly.

Golden Harvest arbitrarily occupied a portion of land within easy viewing distance from ours. She listlessly slid off of her cart and began slowly assembling her own stand, moving with all the energy of a sapped sloth. The sight was so heart wrenchingly pathetic that I decided to lend a hand, and maybe get the lowdown on her condition as well. Applejack and I had already finished with our own stand and she was pressuring me to do something anyway so I had no difficulty convincing her to hold down the fort while I saw to Carrot top. This also served to show Applejack that I meant what I had said about apologizing to the orange haired woman.

I decided to go with a neutral approach; walking closer I addressed her, “Need a hand?”

She looked up at me with dulled eyes before a spark of resentment flashed in them, “If this about offering your sympathy to the latest patsy damsel, then I don’t want it” She spat with some bitter vitriol.

I carried on undeterred by her sudden harshness, “I’m not offering you my empathy, I’m offering my help… if you’re interested” I spoke in an impartial tone, making it seem like I didn’t really care either way.

She gave me a cursory glance filled with irritation before huffing and blowing a stray lock of hair out of her face, “Whatever, just don’t get in the way”

‘Did I damage this girl more than I thought or was she always this bitchy?’ I pondered with mild bemusement, Goldy didn’t like being pitied I guess. 

I shrugged to myself and began assisting her in connecting the prefabricated materials, hooking them together using an odd combination of clasps and an adhesive mixture that solidified quickly, but could be easily removed with a toss of water. The whole time we were doing this, Carrot top pretended to act like I wasn’t even there. But on the plus side she was no longer acting like a sad sally that had watched her pet kitten get kicked in the face repeatedly. Eventually, we had completed our construction and Golden Harvest’s ‘Carrots and things’ vending stand was up and running. From what I could tell, her prices were quite affordable too, with a five pound bag of carrots costing about seven bits. Unlike Applejack however, Golden Harvest only brought one item to sell instead of a myriad of vegetables and or fruits to appeal to all interests. My task done with, I brushed my hands together and spun in place to return to selling apples with my not boss.

“Where are you going?” Goldy’s voice asked in confusion, making me stop in my tracks.

“Back to Applejack’s stand?” I answered earnestly, wondering why she even cared if I left.

“Huh…I was under the impression that you were going to stick around and flirt with me or something” She remarked with some subverted opprobrium evident in her tone.

I was extremely tempted to snark and knock her down a notch, but bit down the disparaging criticism before I could dig myself in any deeper, “Then you were mistaken, I was just being neighborly is all, enjoy the rest of your day” I promptly vacated the premises before she could another word in.

Applejack was near the end of negotiating a sale with the first customer of the day; one of the few males in town too, he had brown slicked back hair and was wearing what looked like a blue business vest with a white collar and corduroy slacks. A nagging sensation in the back of my mind told me that this guy was familiar but I couldn’t quite recall in what manner. Applejack acknowledged me with a small dip of her head while handing over a bag full of produce to her first sale of the day; they were also in the middle of a chat that raised my interest.

“…a new innovation which I hear is becoming quite the rage in the big city, although I’m fairly certain it’s just another one of Concordia’s typical fads that’ll die out in a few weeks. Folk’s had and will always have a need for quills and sofas” The man monologued to my not boss, who was expertly feigning fascinated intrigue.

“And just what ‘fad’ would that happen to be?” I asked, causing the man to turn and regard me for the first time.

“Oh, hello there! I was just conversing with Applejack here about some newfangled invention that’s sweeping the capital like wildfire! They call it a fountain pen, supposed to be some kinda doohickey that marries a quill and ink well together… can you imagine that? Absurd!”

I couldn’t help but develop a grin upon hearing that, “Really? Sounds like something handy to have. Perhaps you should consider investing in this particular fad?”

He looked at me as if I had lost my mind, “That would be like betting against myself good man! I couldn’t in good conscious do that now could I?”

I answered his question with one of my own, “You must be a businessman correct?” He nodded, “Which means that you have the means to acquire goods and have them shipped here to be sold yes?” 

“Aye, I’ve a few friends in the business world that provide me with what I need”

“So how about this, I’ll supply the investment, and all you have to do is acquire these ‘newfangled’ fountain pens and start selling them here in Magiville”

“And just what kind of revenue share are we talking about here?” His tone became more formal, with a lacing of politeness thrown in for good measure.

“Eighty Twenty split. Your eighty, my twenty… with a one hundred bit investment from me”

“That’s a hefty investment friend!” I did my best not to wince at his liberal application of the F word, “And over something so trivial as this, I’ll do you a fifty fifty share since you seem to believe in this new contrivance so adamantly” 

He chuckled to himself, “You remind me of myself when I was a start up entrepreneur, I put my eggs in practically every basket the moment it was weaved! But I mellowed out once I discovered that my calling was providing good folks with writing utensils and luxury lounging upholstery”

“But where are my manners! I haven’t formally introduced myself” He held out his hand, which I firmly shook, “The name’s Davenport, what’s yours my new business partner?”

“Call me Zenith, and I’m just making a minor investment for curiosity’s sake, I don’t think that qualifies me for a partnership”

“Nonsense! I admire anyone with the drive to ‘get with the times’ as it were, you’ll be treated as my equal in this endeavor and no less I say!” He jovially spouted, his toothy smile stretching from ear to ear.

‘I’m starting to wonder if these people take happy pills or something, because they should not be this chummy! Although I suppose Goldy was a relieving aberration to the rule’

“If you insist, then who am I to argue?”

He gave me an appraising look, “So you’re the latest newcomer to Magiville eh? They said nothing about your impressive stature nor the composed way you carry yourself! How have you found your welcome here so far?”

“Agreeable, the adjustment from the city to the countryside has been relatively easy for me” Normally the pleasantries came first before the dealing, but social etiquette could be different here so I just rolled with it.

He winked at me, “Trust me, its going to get even better”

In the peripherals of my vision I saw Applejack shaking her head vigorously and making slashing motions across her neck with both hands, wholly confirming that I was in for something ‘unexpected’ today. I decided to play dumb just for the whimsical theatricality of it.

I let out a thoughtful hum, “I’ll take your word for it” 

I reached into my munny bag and pulled out the bits required for the transaction and forked them over to the oddly ebullient businessman, I was mostly certain he could be trusted, and even if it didn’t work out it was only a hundred bits anyway.

‘Only a hundred bits!? Think of how much snack food that could get us!’ My gluttonous side whined unbidden. I mentally face palmed, I could be such a porker sometimes.

“Well then, I suppose I should get back to the daily grind” Davenport turned to leave, “Tell your dear Granny I said hello won’t you Applejack?” She responded in the affirmative and we watched the man slowly blend into the rapidly growing crowd.

The blonde cowgirl looked at me, “What in tarnation was all that about investin’ a hundred bits in some overblown hoo-ha from the capital? Don’cha know they come and go near as quick as our special cider once Rainbow hears of it?”

“I have a feeling that won’t be the case with this particular novelty… and are people around here really that crazy for your special batch of spiced cider?”

“Darn tootin! Along with the Zapple jam, that cider rakes in the bits like nobody’s business. Though I think RD craves it the most out of all of em, you shoulda seen the look on her face when I gave her a reserve barrel last Hearth’s Warming day, it was like she made flight leader on the Wonderbolts or somethin’” She proudly proclaimed with a chuckle, looking lost in thought at the memories. 

The massive influx of potential customers heading our way cut her reverie short and soon we were flooded with consumers looking to replenish their stores of homegrown fruits and veggies. Most of them casually shooting the breeze with Applejack while they made and paid for their orders, many of them were also looking upon me with thinly veiled interest, their eyes flicking back and forth between the farm girl and the diligent (not to mention devilishly handsome) farm hand in the back sorting out which produce bags went with which customer without skipping a beat. On a somewhat related note, I managed to discern Carrot top staring in the direction of our stall more than a few times with a puzzled expression. I had flummoxed her good, which immediately brought about a random tangential thought that she would make for a good veterinarian. A couple hours of this redundant but simple procedure of bagging and tagging and we had netted ourselves a large profit by midday. Applejack whistled long and loudly once she had finished counting up the pile of bits we had accumulated.

“Whoo wee! We made quite a fine haul so far!” She drawled as she let the coins stack together with audible clinking noises.

“You make it seem like we’ve exceeded our quota or something” I lazily commented as I leaned against one of the wooden posts.

She looked at me with disbelief, “You kiddin’? This ranks as one of the more profitable days I’ve seen in a long while”

“Can’t imagine why” I droned, getting a strong impression that I had acted as some kind of advertising billboard for the many many bachelorettes in town. Though to be fair, we did get a middling number of male buyers as well.

‘Hopefully not for the same reasons’ I grimaced with some mild distaste at the unsavory thought. On the plus side though, it was mildly flattering to capture the interest of so many attractive women, most of them on average would be considered solid sevens to eights back home. It was almost like the magic in the air had the added benefit of beautifying people exposed to it, or at least making them appear... right for lack of a better word.

“Heck, I reckon ah wouldn’t have been able to handle as many customers all by my lonesome. Why not have a share fer all yer hard work?” She grabbed a handful out of the pile and offered it to me.

I held out both of my palms in a stopping motion, “I couldn’t possibly accept, I’ve told you that I’m more than happy to be making myself useful and I meant it Applejack. Keep your farm’s finances nice and fat okay? I’m not exactly hurting for cash these days” I deadpanned at the end, the reassuring weight of the munny bag at my side saw to that.

She shrugged noncommittally, “Suit yerself, awfully generous of ya though”

“Yeah, I’m such a giver” I said with oodles of sarcasm.

She furrowed her brow in thought, “I say you at least earned the right to wear the hat for the rest of the day” She then took the said article of clothing off, her golden hair catching the light of the sun and reflecting it with a slight sheen. Before I could politely refuse it, she capped me on the head. Despite having a larger cranium, the bands in the well-worn hat stretched themselves to accommodate me.

‘It smells faintly of sweat and apples… oddly intoxicating’ I noted.

“Ugh… thanks?” I slowly spoke, blindsided by the sudden and unexpected action.

“Anytime sugarcube. Besides, it looks good on you” She told me, admiring her results.

I personally didn’t think that western wear looked all that fitting on me, but I withheld that opinion and let her have her fun. It was then that she noticed that the wagon was nearly depleted.

“Well… ah’ll be, guess I’m gonna hafta close up shop for a spell while I run back and grab some more supply to feed the demand” She reached under the stand and produced a wooden sign that read ‘We’ll be ripe back in no time!’ and placed it on the counter before mounting the wagon and taking the reins in her hands.

“Feel free to take a well deserved break, I’ll probably return within an hour or so” And with that she snapped the reins and left in the direction of her farm, parting the people like the red sea as she went.

“Well that’s convenient” I muttered to myself, wishing that I had a cheesy looking apron that I could tear off and toss to the side as I swaggered off to find the nearest clockmaker’s shop. 

After about ten minutes of aimless wandering, I realized that I was completely incapable of finding it myself; the buildings were so similar in construction to one another that they were nearly indistinguishable from each other. The sardonic part of me made a snide comparison that one could liken it to their inhabitants overall, very much homogenous in disposition despite the overabundance of diverse physical coloration. So I had little choice but to swallow my manly pride and (I shuddered) ask for directions. I figured the nice trio of florists selling various bouquets of fragrant flowers was as good a place as any to start. The moment the closest one with light green hair saw me approaching her eyes widened with instantaneous fear and she pointed at me.

“Look at his eyes girls! They’re the color of blood! He must be a vampire!”

The other two’s necks swiveled about to face me and their reactions were identical, “He’s wearing Applejack’s hat! He must have gotten to her first!” The other girl frantically pointed out.

“And we’re next!” The one with rose colored hair shrieked, “Everybody run!” All three began running in panicked circles like chickens with their heads lopped off, yelling all the while. 

I stood there with an expression that all but screamed ‘Are you freaking kidding me?’ as I watched the three town criers make utter fools out of themselves in front of anyone in the vicinity, before they huddled together and gazed at me with eyes full of unwarranted fear. Since they were going to be so histrionic about it, I felt it appropriate to act equally ridiculous. I crimped my hands and held them at chest level before speaking in an outrageous Transylvanian accent.

“Indeed my pretties! I haf come to this town in search of easy prey, and I haf vorked myself so hard that I’m feeling rather parched” I loomed over them, my long shadow engulfing them and making them quake with trepidation.

“I vant to suck your vlood! Mwa ha ha ha!” I throat was struck with a fit of scratchiness from overextending and I started coughing, I was no Bela Lugosi after all. I pounded a fist against my chest to recompose myself and I turned the coughing into strained laughter. Their looks of anxiety eventually melted into incomprehension as they traded confused glances with each other. Knowing that the time for nonsense was over I switched back to my normal voice.

“In all seriousness though, did you three forget to include coffee in your breakfast this morning? Because you failed to take into account a great deal of things” I held up some fingers, “First fact. The last I check, vampires aren’t supposed to be up and about during daylight hours without liberally applying sunscreen and some shades. Secondly, I saw my reflection in the mirror this morning (‘and damn am I a sexy beast!’) and everything retained a peachy complexion that looked nothing like pseudo necrotic flesh. Thirdly, I happen to love anything with garlic in it” I mentioned offhandedly.

I was feeling rather contrary at the end for their antics attracting a small circle of people around us who were watching, “And lastly” I wiggled a finger at all three of them, “None of you look nearly delectable enough for me to bite into by any context of the word” The crowd ‘ooh’d’ at the zinger and the three florists squawked indignantly.

“Hey!”

“That’s not very nice!”

“I am so delectable enough to bite into!” Grass hair shouted, both of her companions stared at her, “What? I am”

I folded my arms and held back an amused snort, “Well I was going to ask for directions and maybe buy some flowers, but I guess I’ll have to take my money elsewhere where they won’t judge me based off of my eye color alone” I motioned for the crowd to separate and let me pass when I heard one of them call back.

“Wait!” 

I turned, doing my best to hide the triumphant smirk on my face.

“Yes miss…?” I purposely trailed off.

She flustered, obviously embarrassed by the way things went, “It’s Roseluck sir, and I wanted to apologize on behalf of myself and my colleagues. We’ve been known to…overreact a lot of the time, we can be a little skittish sometimes you see?” She giggled nervously as she looked anywhere but at me.

“You certainly neglected to make use of that gray matter hidden behind those pretty jade eyes of yours” She blushed furiously, whether at the compliment or the disguised jab at her intelligence I couldn’t tell.

“Yes… well, allow us to make it up to you. You said that you were going to ask for directions? Where to?”

“Just the local clock worker’s shop will do”

“You mean Time Turner’s? That’s just at the intersection of Pine Rise and Sunset Boulevard. There’s a sign hanging above the door with a golden grandfather clock on it, you can’t miss it!” She directed, speaking as though she had been there dozens of times.

I held a hand to my chest and bowed, “I am most grateful” I dug into my munny bag and fished out a tenner before flipping it to her, “Here’s a solid form of my thanks. Get yourself something nice Roseluck” 

‘Let it never be said that I wasn’t a good tipper’ I introspected as I walked away. The crowd left murmuring to themselves and dispersing in the wake of my exit.

It only took me another ten minutes of meandering through town to finally come across the intersection that Roseluck told me about. The building that composed Time Turner’s ‘Chronotorium’ was fairly large, about three stories tall and given a bluish paint job for some reason. I humorously wondered if this ‘Time Turner’ had a Tardis disguise itself as a building. The windows were tinted so I wasn’t able to see much of the interior. Shrugging to myself, I opened the door and stepped inside. The first thing to grace my senses was the ticking of clocks… lots of clocks; they lined the walls and shelves like some kind of mechanical gallery of ticks and tocks. 

What really got to me though was how in sync all of them were; every single timepiece matched the rhythm of the one next to it as if they were speaking in one voice. Shaking off the strangeness of the phenomenon, I advanced inside in search of the store’s shopkeeper. There was a desk with papers and mementos stacked on it surface located somewhere in the middle of the shop that had a bell ringer that I could use. Giving it a couple of good taps, I heard a voice with a clipped accent holler down from above me.

“Be patient, I’ll be down right quick!”

“Take your time, I’m on break” I leisurely replied, taking a good look at potential candidates to replace the clock I smashed in the meanwhile.

The telltale sounds of footsteps descending the stairs alerted me to Time Turner’s approach. I set down the item I had been examining and turned to face him, not at all surprised that he bore a striking resemblance to David Tennant. This man also seemed fond of wearing brown pinstripe suits along with a stylish tie.

He greeted me with a cheery smile, “Ello’ there! Welcome to my Chronotorium, what can I do you for?”

“Yes, I was wondering if you do repairs on damaged clocks?”

He nodded, “Indeed I do, let’s see it”

“Fair warning, it’s not a pretty sight” I unlashed the bag containing the fragments from my hip and dumped it on the desk, the man’s eyes widening instantly with shocked surprise.

“My word! You really did a number on this thing” He exclaimed, examining the mangled remains with something like appalled astonishment.

“I don’t know my own strength sometimes, is there anything you can do to fix it?” I tentatively asked, feeling slightly ashamed by what I had done.

“The cost it would take to put this back together exceeds the cost of simply purchasing a new one, this is a fairly standard model that isn’t terribly expensive that I also have plenty of in stock!” He gestured to a row of simulacrums that I failed to notice earlier.

I sighed in relief; this meant that is probably wasn’t something invaluable to the Apple family then.

“I suppose I’ll go with that then, how much?” I asked the simulacrum of a quirky time lord.

He rubbed his chin in contemplation, “Well, if you let me keep the remains to be salvaged for spare cogs and other parts… I’ll let you have another for…lets say twelve bits?”

“Deal” I gave him the three coins required and received a brand new replacement clock, Turner decided to strike up some small talk while we conducted business.

“I’ve not seen you around before, you new in town?” He asked as he looked me over.

“Yes I am, I arrived not two days ago from the capital”

“Ah, a Concordian! How’s the resplendent city these days?” His smile curled upward and showed off impeccably white teeth. His enthusiasm possibly marked him as an aficionado of the admittedly majestic city.

I shook my head, “I’m not a native (‘In more ways than one’) so I can’t exactly speak for its current state of affairs”

The mesmerizing shine of his teeth never faltered, “A shame, it’s been far too long since last I visited. What brings you to our humble slice of home?”

“I’m here because someone important whose wishes I respect, bid that I stay here and ‘learn to properly socialize’ myself from those who do” Ironic, considering how one of the element bearers is about as gregarious as I am.

“I see, you mentioned something about ‘being on break’ as it were?”

‘Man this guy is chatty’

“Just came from the market after a busy round of selling fruit” I explained to the somewhat nosy clock worker.

“Oh? May I ask what kind?” He politely pried, then he glowered, “As long as it isn’t pears, I absolutely despise the nasty little things, the way the texture chafes against the back of your throa…” He realized that he was getting off topic and chuckled sheepishly, probably because I was staring at him like he had just committed a felony.

“And just what do you have against pears? I myself enjoy a good Bartlett every now and again, and another thing…” 

I trailed off and growled to myself, realizing that I had been baited into a pointless debate, “Never mind, to each their own I suppose” I crooked my head downwards in a proper bow, “Thank you for your services, have a nice day”

He stopped me before I could make for the door, “No no no! I fear that we had gotten off on the wrong foot, is there some way I could remedy that?”

I honestly just wanted to leave and enjoy the rest of my break, but decided to indulge in a curiosity that had been nagging at me ever since I stepped inside this strange shop.

“You could tell me how you managed to get all of these clocks to tick in quintessential coordination” I told him, casting a look at his synched up merchandise.

He grinned and tapped a finger against the metallic bulge in his breast pocket, “Normally I’d tell you that its my little secret, but in all truthfulness I spent hours putting together a complicated rig that activated each timepiece in my shop at exactly the moment their dials matched up with those of my personal pocket watch”

“Huh… neat” My unimpressed response finally seemed to put a dent in Turner’s lighthearted demeanor, who’s expression deflated noticeably.

“Just neat huh? Well, I suppose it’s not as dazzling since you haven’t seen it for yourself but ‘neat’ isn’t the word I’d use to describe it” He almost bristled in response.

“Sorry, I have a penchant for underreacting that makes me seem less amazed than I actually am (‘Some of the time anyways’). I’m sure that it was a crafty contraption that reflected the genius of its creator adequately” I did my best to project some sincerity into my voice, mostly succeeding.

He perked up somewhat at the explanation (excuse) and seemed placated enough for me to leave without there being any sort of bad blood between us, if that was even possible in this town. Seeing as he was no longer interested in idly chatting, I felt it best to finally exit the shop and return to the center of town.

“I’ll take my leave then” I tipped my temporary hat to him and turned heel.

Along the way back, I saw a good deal of people reading decorative cards and chatting excitedly to each other, although when some of them laid eyes of me, they instantly shied away. If I wasn’t convinced that Pinkie’s trademark surprise party for newcomers was today, I was now. Even if the signs weren’t there, I already had a passive spell in place that prevented anyone within a certain radius from getting the drop on me. It was actually a little more complicated than I made it sound, but simply put, it’s my magical substitute for spidey sense. I smirked to myself at the local’s efforts to keep it a secret, but if there’s one thing I’ve learned that these Arcanians are terrible at, its subtlety.

I waltzed back into the town square (don’t know why they called it that since it was more circular in shape) and in the direction of Applejack’s still vacant stall, I sighed with impatience, sometimes my need to be efficient results in too much downtime between tasks. The clinking of spare bits in my munny bag reminded me that I had a market full of diverse goods worth taking a look at, and at the very least the window shopping would pass the time until Applejack returned and we finished up with our duties for the day. I strolled through the market, my eyes scanning the emblem or advertised picture above the stalls and appraising their usefulness, I made sure to put adventuring gear at the top of the priority list since I intended to explore the Neverfree castle soon enough. My first stop was at a vendor offering lighting devices, I found myself holding up a flashlight and a small boxy lantern and mentally debating which would serve me more.

‘Lantern or flashlight? Flashlight has a direct and stronger beam, but a lantern illuminates the surrounding area in general. Hmm… choices choices’

The saleswoman, a cute little thing with amber colored locks of hair and a Mana mark depicting a light switch, saw my dilemma and offered me her ‘figurative’ two cents. 

“You should probably go with the lantern, I have an apparatus that allows you to have your hands free while also sporting an attachment hook for lighting purposes” She reached under her stall and produced what looked like a heavily modified black leather backpack with silver buckles sealing its pouches.

I spoke in an inquisitive tone, “And did you happen to make this perchance?”

“Nope! My cousin gizmo gave it to me as a gag gift a couple months ago; I’ve been trying to sell it for a while now. But you look like you might have a use for it!” She eagerly pitched the item to me.

“Gizmo?”

“Uh huh! He has a stall of his own over there!” She pointed behind me to another stall in the background. I followed it until I saw this Gizmo, busy tinkering with something as he peddled his other wares.

“I see, how much do you want for it?” I asked her, her nose actually scrunching as she came up with a figure.

“Well, I have been wanting to get rid of it for a long time. How’s ten bits sound? I’ll even throw in the lantern for free!”

“Sounds like a fair price, miss…?”

“Flip Switch” She stuck out her hand, which I gently shook.

“Wonderful, thanks for your business miss Flip Switch” I tossed her another tenner and donned the backpack, there was long metal rod jutting out from a special compartment in the back that had a multifunctional grasper that I hooked the crystal bulbed lantern to. 

I then made my way over to Gizmo’s stall to get a closer look at both the man and the collection of potential gear and tonics that I could make use of. Upon noticing the customer closing in on him, the man seemed to panic and nearly tripped over himself as he tried to face me with a formal look like he hadn’t made a fool of himself.

“Heh, my first customer of the day! Welcome to Gizmo’s, I’m Gizmo as you might have noticed. How can I improve your life today?” He spouted with a stereotypically nerdy voice, complete with pizza face and big round glasses. The dude needed some extensive in-depth work… and maybe a little Accutane, before he could attract the ladies socially, let alone the massive number of lady customers in the square. He even had a pocket protector on top of his pocket protector! I kept that opinion to myself though, didn’t want to hurt the poor guy’s feelings after all.

“Depends, what do you have that could improve my life?” I cocked a brow.

“Ugh… um… well” He stuttered, clearly he hadn’t worked on part two of his master plan to promote his homemade contrivances and tonics.

“How about this? I’ll point out the item and you reveal to me its purpose and functionality, let’s start with this” I picked up something that looked like a cheap knockoff of the batclaw, “This reminds me of a grappling hook device, but I can’t be too certain. Tell me how it works”

“Grappling hook, I knew that pneumatic fluke launcher was too convoluted of a title!” He frustratedly muttered to himself, “That Grappling hook device, uses highly pressurized air to fire the hook at distances of a maximum of about forty feet. There’s a dial on the pommel that adjusts for lesser distances if you so choose. To reuse it, just wind it back up and give it a few good pumps”

“And how sturdy is the hook itself?”

“It’s anodized steel, it should be durable enough for whatever you’ll use it for. The roping included should also be resistant to fraying and snapping due to high tensile stress” He made for a convincing argument in favor of his bulbous contraption.

“I might have a use for this, how much do you want for it?” I probably didn’t since I had my wings, but I felt pity for this awkward man.

“It took me a while to put that thing together, so I’ll part with it for twenty five bits”

“Sold” I handed him the money, my bag of bits now feeling a good deal lighter than it did this morning. I undid the buckle to the main pouch and dropped my newly acquired grappling hook launcher inside.

“Could I also interest you in some invigorating tonics perhaps? They’re not a half bad substitute for coffee! Though the same can’t be said about its flavor” He chuckled self deprecatingly.

“Ima ‘fraid not, but this kind of contraption takes some serious skill to craft though. You made this by yourself?” I asked, twirling the gun in my fingers, taking extra care not to accidentally fire it.

“You bet I did! I didn’t earn my Mana mark in engineering for nothin’!” He proudly stated before lifting up his shirt sleeve to reveal…a robot?

“Do you even know what that is?” I asked the nerdy man, somewhat bewildered by this twist of events.

“Meh, I think it’s some kind of automaton. I made one for a science fair project when I was younger, but it was too ahead of its time to get the recognition it deserved. Earning my Mana mark was recompense enough for me” He explained with a shrug. I made another mental note to remember this one; his skills could be of use some day, especially if I decided to integrate my home world’s mechanical innovations into this one.

“I see my cousin finally managed to get rid of the gift I gave her” The poindexter sniffed as he laid eyes on my new adventuring pack.

“She made such a decent sales pitch that I just couldn’t refuse the little lady” I jestingly spoke with a grin.

He huffed, “Did she even fully inform you of its uses? Or did she just tell you that it made a great hanger for her lighting instruments?”

“That’d be a big no, thought I’d figure that out for myself” I answered, shifting my pack in punctuation.

“Well I’m going to tell you anyway, as well as having a rod to attach a light to, it also has powerful enchantments on it to increase storage space, organize the materials you put into it, and even be set to only be unlocked by you”

“Wow, and she only sold it to me for ten bits!” I exclaimed, now knowing that I got a really good deal.

“The enchantments alone were worth over five times that amount” He deadpanned, a scowl on his face.

“Should’ve explained that to your cousin then” I shrugged noncommittally, “So how do I get this pack to only recognize me?”

“Just slap a representation of your Mana mark onto it and the enchantments will take care of the rest”

“Oh, that sounds so… simple” I uttered, slightly disappointed. 

‘So much for that!’

“Uh huh. Anyways, between us guys…” He leaned towards me and spoke in a badly hushed whisper, “Do you know how to talk to girls?”

I stared at him like he had asked a stupid question, “The overwhelming majority of people I’ve spoken to in the last twenty four hours have been female. Why are you asking?”

He flustered, visibly embarrassed by what he was about to ask, “Well I’m not the most proficient at speaking with the fairer sex and there’s this one gal I’ve had a crush on for a while… but I’ve always frozen up with fear every time I’ve gathered up the courage to get within hearing distance of her”

“Okay… and who is this lucky lady?” I wisely kept my tone neutral and resisted a chuckle at how pathetic this guy was acting.

“The one over there, selling carrots” He gestured in the direction of a certain orange haired woman, handing a tied up bunch of equally orange vegetables to one of her customers.

‘You must be joking’

“Golden Harvest? You have a crush on Golden Harvest?” I repeated, floored yet again by unforeseen factors.

“Shh! Quiet, I don’t want the whole town to know!” He shushed me, despite the fact that he was currently making more noise than I ever did.

“Chill, what’s so difficult about this? If she’s single and you think you might have a shot, don’t be afraid to ask her out. If she rejects you, then it’s her loss (‘Because you can’t afford to be choosey with a gender disparity as lopsided as this’) and no skin off your back” I nonchalantly listed, not having a problem with letting my opinion be known.

“But what if she does reject me!? I don’t know how I’d deal with that” He almost whimpered, “Look at you. You’re tall, rakishly handsome, not…me. You’re probably up to your elbows in swooning women!” He declared with envious jealousy.

“I don’t bring sand to the beach if that’s what you mean, but I’m not the kind of guy who goes out into the world and womanizes” I mildly reproached him for the insipid implication, “I treasure the close women in my life, always taking care to provide for their emotional needs, lending an understanding ear if they feel the need to vent, and reminding them that I believe that they’re amazing, even if no one else does”

He groaned pessimistically, “That’s another thing you have over me, you’re a romantic! Women love that sappy stuff!”

“I know a few women who’d disagree with you on that” I chuckled before becoming stern again, “But seriously though, don’t stall, don’t stutter, just be a man and go ask her out. Failing that, at least try to grab her attention and let her know that you’re interested”

He slumped down in his stall, “I don’t think I have the confidence to do that” 

I sighed for what must have been the tenth time that day, this wasn’t the kind of situation I’d ever envision myself being part of. What do I do? Offer to be this guy’s wingman? Play matchmaker like one of those… ‘shippers?’. This was just too much drama for someone like me to stomach. But on the other hand, finding Carrot top a caring mate would be good progress in making up for the Fright Night incident.

“I could… set you up on a date by proxy” I hesitantly offered, feeling very uncomfortable with what I was about to do if he accepted.

“You’d really ask her for me!? That’s just sublime!” He all but cheered in excitement.

“But first you gotta tell me why you fancy Golden Harvest over there” I pointed a thumb in her direction.

“Golly, where do I start? I admire how she works so hard to grow and provide us aliments with sufficient carotene, I kinda need it for my less than optimal vision you see?” I rolled my eyes at the terrible banality, “She’s always friendly to those around her” (‘Not when they’re me!’) “Not to mention that she’s breathtakingly gorgeous, the golden ratio’s got nothing on all of those curves!”

‘And there’s the sexual attraction, at least he’s honest’

“Okay then, but remember, even if she accepts your invitation to a date. You’ll have to take over from there, I will not be the one holding your hand through this, in fact you should end up holding hers if you play your cards right and act like the gentleman that she deserves. Got it?” He nodded fervently, “Good, now tell me what the fanciest restaurant in town is” I commanded.

“Huh? Why?” He asked, visibly perplexed.

“Because a good date usually involves a nice meal, provides an atmosphere where you can converse and tell her about yourself and ask about her, and from there that typically leads to a night on the town” I told him, the logic behind it slowly dawning on him.

He smiled, “I like the way you think friend!” I winced at the second dropping of the F bomb that day, my vexation apparently going unnoticed by the man who adjusted his glasses in thought.

“I hear good things about this one place called the ‘Three Leaf Clover’, it has a good variety of cuisines and the service is excellent. A little on the pricey side, but Golden Harvest is worth it!” He divulged, the smile on his face curling upwards at finally having a chance with the object of his desires.

“Right, well I’m off to ask a girl out… in your stead” He didn’t seem to catch the derisive tone I injected into the statement.

I caught Goldy at a good time, right between a bout of customers. She saw me coming and pretended not to pay me any mind, though I could see that she was watching me from the corners of her eyes. I appraised a nice looking bunch of carrots and decided to buy them; this also meant that she couldn’t ignore me for whatever reason she had for being prickly.

“You again, what do you want this time?”

“To buy some carrots… and also to inform you that you have a secret admirer who wishes to take you to dinner at the Three Leaf Clover on a day of your choosing” Her brows shot up at the revelation before furrowing once more.

“This ‘secret’ admirer wouldn’t happen to be you would it?” She narrowed her eyes at me. This spiky attitude of hers was starting to get the better of me.

“Heck no! Would it’d be a secret if did it himself instead of asking me to tell you?” She looked somewhat amused by my response.

“I’ll bite, who is he?”

“Somebody who is so captivated by your incredible beauty and elegant poise that his knees lock up at the thought of sullying your immaculate presence with his own, which he feels he must earn the privilege of basking in” I waxed poetic, feeling struck with sudden inspiration for as I caught sight of Fluttershy slowly sauntering towards Carrot top’s stall with a basket under her arm. The woman in question crossing her arms and giving off a rather unladylike snort.

“Poetry is wasted on me, but you can tell my secret admirer that I’ll accept his invitation, out of curiosity if nothing else. But if I wind up less than impressed, both of you will be banned from my stand” She issued her threat.

“Fair enough” I idly responded, keeping most of my attention locked on the graceful and demure woman keeping to herself as she walked amongst the people in the marketplace.

Oddly enough she perked up when she saw me standing there, “Oh, good morning Zenith. Are you shopping for groceries too?” She sweetly asked once she came within talking distance (for her). 

“In a manner of speaking. By the way, how much for these?” I shook the bunch I was holding in front of Goldy.

“Keep em, consider that my way of saying thanks for helping me set up the stall… and my schedule for tomorrow evening” She genially replied, probably to save face in front of a customer.

“I’ll be sure to let him know, and you’re welcome for that” I patiently waited for Fluttershy to buy herself some carrots so we could resume our conversation.

“So if you don’t mind me asking, what did she mean when she was thanking you?” The shy girl humbly requested as we walked together.

“She was looking kinda down when she first arrived in the market, so as a first step in apologizing to her for the night which shall not be mentioned, I helped her set up her stand. This whole setting her up on a blind date thing is entirely unrelated” I waved a hand at the end, eliciting a subdued giggle out of the delicate pink haired woman.

“That’s kind of you, I’m sure she appreciated your sincerity greatly” She smiled up at me… God, that weapons grade smile.

I scratched the back of my head, “I guess, how about you? Shop at Carrot top’s often?”

“Oh yes, Golden Harvest always has the best carrots, my little Angel absolutely loves them”

“Who’s Angel?” I feigned ignorance.

“He’s my pet bunny, he can be a little unruly sometimes. But he’s just the sweetest thing once you get to know him” She looked to me, “Do you have any pets?”

“My family used to own a dog and a cockatiel when I was younger, but I myself don’t have one”

“That’s a shame, but if you ever feel in need of their company, I know plenty of little critters who’d love to meet you” She offered with a smile, an offer I’d have to put off unfortunately.

“I’ll have to take a rain check on that, I still have to inform a certain someone of the good news. Will I see you later perhaps?” I asked her with a hopeful tone.

“Sooner than you think” She unexpectedly winked at me before continuing on her merry way, evaporating into the colorful crowd. It took me a few moments to realize that I had been standing there watching her leave with small smile on my face. I coughed and recomposed myself, I didn’t want to keep Gizmo waiting and chewing on his nails in suspense did I now?

I returned to Gizmo’s stand with a neutral expression so I could make him squirm for a bit.

“Well? How’d it go?” He was actually sweating as he awaited what I had to say.

“Hope you don’t have any plans for tomorrow evening, because you sir have got yourself a date!” I grinned at the end; I’m allowed to be histrionic myself now and again.

“Yes!” He fist pumped in victory, “I’ll definitely tell the other guys that our D&D session is postponed, thank you so much! Even if this doesn’t work out, you ever need me for anything, then I’m your guy!”

“I’ll hold you to that” I solemnly apprised him, a shrill whistle caught my awareness and a turned to see my not boss finally arrive with another wagon of goods waiting to be sold and waving at me to inform me that break time was officially over.

“Looks like its back to the grind for me” I tipped my hat to Gizmo, “See you around” I didn’t feel the need to recommend that he wear something fancy and clean himself up, he should be able to figure that out by himself.

I reached Applejack as soon as she finished hitching Clyde and Dale to one of the many hitching posts surrounding the town hall.

“Finally back huh?” I dryly asked of the hatless cowgirl as she pulled down the wooden trunk cover of the wagon to access the goods.

She looked at me funny, “What’aya mean finally? I couldn’tve been longer than an hour… or two” She tried her best to speak candidly, but there was a telltale waver in her voice that warned me of an imminent surprise party once we got back.

“If you say so, let’s get back to making some serious dough” I placed my recently obtained carrots on my side of the passenger bench.

“Dough? Does this look like a bakery ta you?” She chortled at the flat expression I gave her.

“Dough, bits, moolah, shekels…money! It’s just a figure of speech Applejack” I huffed; feeling annoyed by how much she was enjoying her teasing of me.

“Ya don’ have to refer to me by my full name sugarcube, feel free ta just call me AJ alright?”

“Ok then AJ, let’s get back to selling the people what they need” I pressured her, eager to burn some time doing something productive.

“Don’t be overexertin’ yerself now sugarcube, you’ll need your energy for later” She said with a chuckle, I dialed down the ardor in response.

“Do I still have to wear your hat? It doesn’t aerate very well” I whiningly asked, although this was mostly an excuse, to me AJ just didn’t look the same without it.

“No ya don’t, give it here” I handed it back, watching as she put it on with stylish flair, she finally looked complete again.

She clapped her hands together, “Let’s hop to it!”


⁂


And so the next few hours were spent raking in even larger amounts of gold coins while also insuring that the pantries of practically everyone in town would be full for the next week. This time around, Applejack had brought some freshly baked apple pies that were not only American, but very delicious as well, which I found out for myself during a snack interval. They also sold like hotcakes, all twenty of them gone within a period of fifteen minutes. Much of the time AJ spent during her absence was baking them in mass, though when I asked her how she was able to make them all taste so freaking good, she smirked and told me that it was a close family secret. I don’t think she caught my meaning when I remarked that she and Colonel Sanders had that in common.

Before long the Sun was beginning to set and everybody started packing up his or her stall in order to go home. I aided Applejack in dismantling ours and placing the components in the wagon while she unhitched Clyde and Dale to yoke them to harness. By and large, I liked how the day went, it was less tiring than whacking apple trees with mallets and more fulfilling in seeing the content customers fork over their coin for the literal fruits of our labor. The ride back to Sweet Apple Acres was spent in total silence, which I welcomed since it gave me some time to be alone with my thoughts. 

I made up my mind to visit the Neverfree castle tonight; I wouldn’t have to travel along the forest floor since I was reasonably certain that the spires of the no doubt dilapidated stone building poked above the canopy, but I was yearning for some adventure, so I’d walk there anyway. Still, I had to make sure that I was decently prepared; there was no telling what I might find in the ruins of a haunted castle. Most likely the path would be fraught with danger…and excitement. But I didn’t have to be too concerned, Luna did teach me the spell to vanquish dark spirits, all I needed to do was latch onto it with my magic and chant some words that would essentially give the spirit an excruciating boot from the mortal realm. It was too bad that I didn’t take the time to visit a blacksmith to see if they offered any kind of light armor that could serve as protection while still allowing me full mobility. I paid it no mind though; I’d just have to rely on my augmented reflexes to keep me out of harm’s way I guess.

We pulled up in front of the farmhouse and AJ motioned for me to get off here, telling me that she could park the cart and lead Clyde and Dale back to their stables by herself. I put up no resistance and entered the house to head back to my room and put away the replacement clock I bought from Time Turner’s and stow my prewashed carrots in my regular bag for later snacking. I left my new adventuring pack with the grappling hook to the side of my bed. Because I didn’t feel the need to go anywhere else, I pulled out my laptop and started testing out a new spell that I had recently come up with during my many brainstorming periods back in the Royal palace. After something like fifteen minutes, I was just about to begin my warm up trial run when I heard AJ’s voice call out to me from outside my open window.

“Zenith! Got time to help me out with somethin’ in the barn?”

“Sure thing AJ! Be down in a sec!” I closed my laptop and jogged downstairs past a sleeping Annabelle with a curled up Winona on her lap and onto the front porch. 

The big red barn that AJ mentioned wasn’t hard to miss since it was located at the forefront of their property, even in the dimming light of dusk. I ambled my way to it to see one of the large doors leading inside creaked open and shushed whispering coming from inside. I smirked to myself; this was a badly executed attempt to surprise me. Still, the thought and consideration put into even having this despite my poor first impression was charming in its own way. Acting on the spur of the moment, I decided to have a little fun with this; I cast a quick spell on myself that would allow me to see into the interior of the barn without having to open the doors. Sure enough, there was a large mass of people lying in wait with anticipative grins on their faces and various instruments like party poppers and whistles to hammer the surprise effect home. There was a gap in the middle of the crowd large enough to suit my plans for turning the tables on them, I took cover next to the wall and put my simple plan into effect.

‘Time to enact phase one’ I used my magic to stimulate a burst of wind that slowly swung the cracked door open, it wasn’t long before shouts of ‘Surprise!’ rung out and were shortly followed by murmurs of confusion when the guest of honor was unexpectedly absent.

‘Phase two is a go’ I gathered up a small chunk of my magic and used it to power a short jump teleportation spell straight into the gap I saw earlier. I appeared with a bright flash and a smarmy simper on my face, causing those around me to jump in shock at my sudden entrance.

“Who’s surprised now?” I bumptiously asked, the self-satisfied smile never leaving my face. It may have meant establishing myself among the populace as a Stellar Mage, but declaring my temporary identity in exchange for the flabbergasted looks on their innocent faces was a small price to pay in opinion.

I used the stunned lull of the blindsided throng to take in the redecorated interior of the barn, because I had appeared in the middle, I had to read the banner welcoming me backwards; which had a standard greeting written on it. There were colorful balloons and festive garlands draped over all of the rafter beams, which gave the atmosphere a cheerful tone to it; though I thought the pine fresh smell that they added to the air made for an nice touch. The interior of the barn was also a lot roomier than I gave it credit for; there were dozens upon dozens of partygoers in attendance and there was still enough room to spare for a red and black checkered dance floor in the center of it all, with colored lights for illumination hanging close by. In the back were honest to goodness fat tower speakers and a DJ’s setup to boot! My personal favorite however were the tables absolutely stockpiled with scrumptious looking treats worthy of a king’s feast. Though my face hardly showed much, I found it touching that they pulled out all the stops simply to welcome me to their cozy town.

“Hey!” Came an indignant shout from a displeased looking Pinkie, who swiftly invaded my personal space to send a baleful glare my way, “I planned a surprise welcome party for you! You weren’t supposed to go and surprise us… I checked too! Opposite day isn’t for another three months!”

“Well…” I thought quickly for a good excuse, “I found it a tad surprising that you’d go through the effort of setting this little shindig up for my sake, I can honestly say that this is the first time I’ve ever had that happen to me” 

I raised my voice as to address the whole of the party, “And I am genuinely humbled that all of you would devote time out of your private schedules in order to rejoice and be merry alongside me” I dipped my head in a grateful bow, “So thank you…” I peered back up to see them smiling, my heartfelt words having left a strong impression on them. I couldn’t really see any familiar faces in them other than the main six’s save for Davenport’s, but it wasn’t like I was expecting all the residents I had met to be present.

I struck my hands together to get the ball rolling, “So who’s ready to have a good time? Raise your hand and shout aye!”

A chorus of wild agreement answered me as all in attendance flung their hands in the air. The DJ with the iconic purple shades standing behind the turntables took that as her cue to put the needle down. Lively and upbeat music began pouring out of the speakers and bathed the air with its pounding rhythms. It made for a nice distraction as I squeezed through the springing bunches and set a course for the punch bowl.  That didn’t stop six distinguished figures from finding me and engaging in chitchat as I poured myself a nice glass of (hopefully not gummied) fruit punch to quench my thirst.

“That was quite the uplifting little speech you delivered back there darling. Such eloquence is truly befitting a princely figure such as yourself” Rarity complimented me with a fawning quiver of her ample eyelashes.

“I’m no Prince miss Rarity, though I certainly aspire to retain the scrupulous values of one” I dismissively replied before taking a swig of my drink, it had a strange spicy tang to it that I couldn’t quite place. That’s when I realized that it was spiked with alcohol, and that I had inadvertently risked my sobriety by not asking about it earlier. I shrugged to myself and downed the rest of it anyhow, finding it mildly amusing that this party of mine was far from G rated.

I sighed contently and set my glass away in a dirty dish bin, “So where’s Spike, Twilight? He couldn’t make it?” I asked the librarian.

“I have him re-cataloging all four dozen volumes of my old astronomy books, I figured that this party wouldn’t have been to his taste anyway” She motioned to the punch to support her statement.

‘Poor Spike, always being treated like a little kid. Which I suppose he actually is, in a cosmic sort of way’ I mused while nodding in faux understanding.

“Nice entrance by the way, you’ll have to tell me how you managed to mask the pop of air that occurs when you displace the air around you with a blink spell” She solicited me with her commending remark.

“It’ll take a large expenditure of mana on your part, but I’ll compare notes with you before long” Her eyes actually glimmered with excited expectancy.

“I’m really glad you like your party, Pinkie and the other’s went through so much effort to make you feel welcome to our wonderful home” Fluttershy spoke up, huddling much closer to her friends when surrounded by so many people.

“Truly I do” I replied with complete candor, “You people really didn’t have to go out of your way just to provide me with such a exuberant reception, but I appreciate it none the less”

“Well of course I did! It’s my duty as the premier party person of Magiville to insure that everyone passing through at least gets a reminder that their presence is cause for celebration, and what better way to celebrate than to party!” Pinkie energetically bounded up and down as she spoke.

I faced Applejack next, “So is this what you had in mind when you told me to save my energy AJ? Cause I got more than enough to spare for this get together”

She sported a devious looking grin, “Partially. Ya see… we here at the farm have this one time honored tradition that I’m plannin’ on breaking out in ten or more minutes that’ll really test yer mettle”

“Oh? And what might that be?”

She shook her head and her grin grew larger, “You’ll just have ta wait n’ see, now won’t ya?”

I pretended to be irritated, “Fine! Keep me in suspense then” I acknowledged Dash next, “Yo Rainbow”

“Whatup? So are you gonna show off your sweet moves on the floor?” She smiled coyly at me and motioned to where everybody was currently grooving to the beat.

I looked up like I was deep in thought, “Hmm…I think I just might! Hang tight for a sec” I started treading towards the DJ’s stand with the intent of discovering just how compatible the analogous tech here with my own.

The shorthaired girl chortled with poorly suppressed mirth, “Don’t embarrass yourself out there too much kay?”

‘You’re going to swallow your words Skittles, this I swear!’ I ignored her jab and walked up to the slowly head banging DJ, she was a pale girl with the most electric looking hair I had seen so far. She noticed my approach and pulled one of her headphones down to regard me.

“Got a request pretty boy?” She asked, scrutinizing me up and down with a tilt of her head.

Whatever I was about to originally say was cut off by that last remark, “Pretty boy? I am more of the roguishly handsome type thank you very much… and in a manner of speaking, yes. May I see your hookups?”

She tilted her shades down, revealing a striking pair of crimson eyes not unlike my own, “Depends, what do you have in mind?”

I dug into my pocket and fished out one of my precious devices and few reminders of home and twirled it in my fingers. I looked at the easygoing DJ with a knowing grin as she eyed my IPod with an interested expression.

“Your stuff is good, make no doubt about it. But I’ve got a track that’s something I can really jam to, if’n you catch my drift” I stuck out a thumb in the vicinity of the dance floor where the exhausted looking dancers were vacating and bearing towards the snack table and conveniently allowing for me to borrow the stage light.

“If you think you can make it work, then go for it! You’re the guest of honor here, not me” She motioned for me to step up next to her.

“Glad you see it my way” I hopped onto the platform beside her and proceeded to examine the set up, inexplicably finding a USB plugin and a unused cord just asking to be utilized.

‘I stopped being dumbfounded by these weird coincidences long ago’ I grabbed the line and connected it with my IPod, causing the music to temporarily cease and grab everybody’s attention. I flicked my finger through the song selection until I found the one I was looking for, giving it a tap and airing it for the first time in Arcania.

I strutted onto the lit up floor checkers and allowed my passive muscle memory spell do it’s work, subconsciously guiding my movements to emulate those I had been watching online. I didn’t spend those fifteen minutes twiddling my thumbs you know, and this was as good a spot as any to begin testing it out. I was already starting to see the results as I swayed side to side with liquid like smoothness followed by a half spin to a crouch as soon as the bass dropped. I did a complex series of sideway somersaults, handstand spins, and drumming my hands against the ground like the Night Fox from Ocean’s twelve (Who ‘inspired’ many of my motions). I wasn’t much for dancing, but the way I was mechanically moving in absolute coordination with the music must have proven hypnotic, because most of the crowd had stopped whatever they were doing to gawk at me. By the end of the song, I had returned to the same spot I had initiated in with a dramatic flourish. My reward was the roaring applause of everybody who had been watching and a priceless jaw drop from Dash.

I retrieved my IPod from the setup and garnered a ‘not bad’ look of approval from the DJ.

“You know how to move pretty boy, I’ll give you that” She complimented; it was enough for me to ignore her grossly inaccurate nickname for myself.

“I guess I do, thanks for letting me commandeer your equipment for a bit” I made my way back to the punch bowl spot, Dash still staring at me with an expression of sheer disbelief plastered on her face.

“Wish I had my camera” I smugly echoed her words before giving myself pause, “Oh wait… I do” I tapped the camera function on my IPod and pointed it at the frozen woman, the ‘Ka-click!’ noise adding insult to injury.

I smiled to myself as I gazed upon the saved image, “Oh yeah, that’s a Kodak moment right there”

That seemed to snap her out of it, “And just what was that!? Yesterday I found you floundering out in the fields, and now you’re tearing it up like some professional choreographer! What changed?”

I shrugged, “I just got better is all, guess I won’t be asking for your advice any time soon”

She huffed, not happy at having egg on her face, “Yea, well you’re still about as good as egghead over here in comparison to me!” She elbowed said girl, who frowned at her disapprovingly and muttered something to herself about Valkyrian hotheadedness.

“I don’t rightly know what Dash is goin’ on about, those were some damn fine moves out there sugarcube!” AJ tipped her glass of punch in my direction with a toasting gesture.

“Yeah! I don’t think I’ve ever seen anybody with moves like that! And I’ve tried out almost all of them in the manual!” Pinkie produced a handbook out of her frizzy hair and opened it up to stare at it thoroughly.

“You were very good” Fluttershy nodded and smiled at me.

“It was not something that I am normally accustomed to associate with dancing… but I suppose there’s no accounting for varied tastes” Rarity said before sipping out of her glass like the prim and proper lady she strived to be.

“Better than I could’ve done” Twilight acknowledged, “I don’t think studying all of the books on Ethno-choreology in existence could make me any less sloppy with my footwork and timing”

“I could help you out with that too, if you wanted” I told her, the thoughtful look on her face telling me that she’d seriously consider it.

“Encore, encore!” The delighted masses started to repeat, shaking their fists and the air and systematically stomping their feet.

“Psst!” Pinkie loudly whispered in my ear, “I told them that you could sing too!”

“And just how would you know that?” I cocked a brow at the overbearing woman.

“Dashie told me about all about your ‘earlier’ performance in AJ’s fields” She stated factually with a coy smile, before shoving my guitar into my arms, “Don’t forget to make it good!”

‘Do I even want to know how she just hammer spaced my guitar?’

I looked up at her, “Don’t tell me… in case of serenading emergencies?”

“Uh huh! You’re good!” She passionately nodded. I could have sworn I heard a cowbell shaking noise accompany the action.

I searched my memory banks for something worth playing when I remembered a quote I had said earlier after I whacked the mole known as my alarm clock. It was a fitting song too, the lyrics summed up how I felt quite nicely and I happened to know the finger work involved to play it acoustically. I found a nice haystack to pop a squat on as the crowd surrounded me with eager expressions on their gleeful faces. Without delay, I began strumming the instrument given to me by Octavia for the second time. In the back, I saw that Pinkie had somehow procured a small drum set and was lightly tapping the cymbals as she backed up my guitar. My audience was instantly enraptured in the music, some of the more emotional people even shedding a couple tears at the message imbued within the lyrics.

The applause I obtained once the song reached its terminus was much more subdued, my audience clearly thinking deeply about what they had borne witness to. I handed my guitar back to Pinkie so she could do whatever it was she did and put it back where she got it. Despite the content of the song I had just poured my heart into, none of the element bearers asked me about it, which I was thankful for. I think we developed enough of an unspoken understanding that they didn’t need to.

I heard a low-pitched whistle come from one end of the barn that Applejack immediately responded to with one of her own, “Alright ere’body! Ya’ll feelin’ up for a little competition?” The majority of the now happy horde rallying in the affirmative, “Bring in the barrels Mac!”

I turned to see the heavily built man enter the barn carrying a sizable keg of what was no doubt alcoholic fluid on each shoulder. Setting them down and clearing a spot at the long snack table before going back to repeat the process. Everyone starting whooping and hollering in even greater excitement, they knew what was in store for them.

I turned to Applejack, “Lemme get this straight, your time honored family tradition involves imbibing more the person across from you?”

“Eeyup! You up for it? The grand prize is a special barrel of our famous reserve spiced apple cider” She waggled her eyebrows indicatively.

“Oh man! You’re making your reserve cider the prize!? I am so winning this competition, for the cider!” Rainbow put on her game face; she really loved her spiced cider apparently.

“I’m not really a drinker, I’ll pass…” I tentatively said, staring off to the side.

“That’s cause you know you can’t keep up with the Dash!” She proudly pointed both thumbs to herself; she was just itching to be knocked down a few pegs. Pride goes before the fall… her fall that is.

“Permit me to test that statement. We’ll see who drinks who under the table tonight!” I grabbed a seat closest to the kegs and snatched up one of the many mugs that AJ had provided. Dash took the seat across from me and copied me with a competitive gleam in her eye. 

“Ugh… I refuse to watch the rest of these heathens humiliate each other over something as unpalatable as a barrel of that gut rot. Come along Fluttershy” Rarity exclaimed with disdain and moved to another portion of the barn with the diminutive woman in tow.

About a dozen and a half other people soon joined us and before long we had our small contest ready to go. Even though I wouldn’t breathe a word of it to anyone, I was beating myself up over my hasty decision. I didn’t know how much I could tolerate before kissing the dirt and I was purposely breaking one of the implicit rules I had applied to myself over an issue of pride alone. I couldn’t back out now though, it was time to put my money where my mouth was… or my drink to be specific. I sniffed at my filled mug and discovered that it was beer that made up the main course.

I lifted it high in a convivial salute to the others, who emulated me, “As some of my distant ancestors used to say, ‘Prost!’” I titled the mug bottoms up and glugged down the bitter tasting drink. Finishing at roughly the same time as Rainbow, I held down an emergent hacking cough and held out my mug to be refilled.

And so went the first of many rounds of frothy mugs from the tap. I had to hand it to Rainbow; the woman’s cheeks only began to get rosy after the fourth mug. It may have been my imagination, but she probably had the same level of tolerance as my girlfriend. Which is to say that this contest could have been ridiculously harrowing. If it weren’t for something mind boggling bizarre, I wasn’t displaying any signs of alcohol consumption whatsoever. I wasn’t turning red, I wasn’t having difficulty keeping my balance on the wooden stool, I wasn’t even starting to feel the least bit tipsy! I was starting to wonder if my hardy Trifect physiology was preventing me from getting that buzz that Daring had raved to me about on more than one occasion. Before long, the last four contestants not having succumbed to the drink were myself, a heavily swaying Rainbow, a purple haired woman who I knew just had to be Berry Punch, and strangely enough; Big Macintosh who while visibly inebriated, still kept his stoic face screwed on tight.

The last two eventually chose to drop out, each staggering out of the barn in search of a lavatory to hurl in. Rainbow wasn’t fairing much better, she looked at me with incredulity and spoke in a very slurred voice.

“Hows hzit yuer still shtandin? Nobody can pound down ash many as me and shtill be conc-Hic! Conscio…” She slumped over and fell off her chair, signifying her defeat. She lifted a shaky arm into the air and whimpered something about losing such a magnificent prize that I barely picked up on.

Applejack grabbed my free arm and raised it up. “Zenith here is the winner! And still lookin’ sober on top of it!” She noted with amazement.

“Keep the cider for me alright? I’ll probably save it for a special occasion” She nodded her agreement and began cleaning up after all the spilled mugs and other debris left on the table.

The rest of the festivities went well, the people who had drunk their fill and were still coherent enough to stand were singing local ditties off key and haphazardly, but with joviality in their intoxicated hearts. I resigned myself to becoming a bit of a wallflower, leaning against one of the wooden pillars holding up the structure of the barn and people watching. Every so often, I would be approached by one of the partygoers who would engage in casual conversation where questions and lists of hobbies were exchanged, as well as witticisms passed on by me when they said something foolhardy or injudicious on their part. There was also the mayor, who wisely refrained from giving into the drunken degeneracy (and insisted that I call her Evelyn for some reason). The most memorable of the bunch however was when this one girl whose body language screamed of floozy sidled up next to me in order to solicit.

“Hey hot stuff, want to find out what it feels like to explode twice?” A very drunk woman with lemon chiffon hair and half lidded orchid eyes inquired of me with a comical ‘hic!’ and sultry smile.

I gave her an unamused look, “One word…abstinent”

She clapped both hands against her head, “Gak! My poor non virgin ears!" She exclaimed dramatically.

A girl with what I could only describe as watermelon hair promptly grabbed the intoxicated bimbo and pulled her away from me.

“You’ll have to overlook Cloudkicker here, she’s even more insufferable after guzzling some liquid courage” She vouched for her loose friend’s behavior with a nervous titter.

“It’s quite alright, miss…?”

“Blossomforth, it's been nice to meet you though!” She hurriedly escorted the wobbling blonde outside and presumably back home.

Moreover, I did have this strange encounter with a girl sitting outside the barn door that wore a green hoodie and was plucking at a lyre. She said something cryptic about the jocund sounds of people connecting with each other providing her a sort of warmth that went beyond physical sensation. Before I could get more out of her however, I was interrupted by Pinkie who wanted me to spin her for pin the tail on the jackass (don’t know why they used that instead of donkey). When I turned back to face the hooded girl, she had up and disappeared. I shrugged to myself and indulged the Pink one for a good spin.

Like all good things, the party eventually came to an end, and the exhausted guests returned to their abodes to get some rest. I stayed behind with the girls to aid with clean up time, adamantly refusing to sit out restoring the barn back to its previous condition just because the party had been for me. Eventually they relented and let me speed up the process with a helpful dosage of my magic. Soon, we said our farewells and went our separate way, with Fluttershy kindly offering to take the woozy Rainbow Dash back to her cottage to recover. I walked with Applejack back to the farmhouse, chuckling alongside her at her recounting the more humorous events of the day.

The cowgirl yawned and rubbed at her eyes once we passed the screen door into her home, “Whoo wee, am I feelin’ tuckered. Nighty night Zenith” She unexpectedly gave me a one armed hug and ascended the stairs to her bedroom.

I followed her example and relocated myself to my guest room, taking care to firmly close the door behind me and waiting until I was certain that everyone in the house was asleep. I checked and rechecked my belongings and allocated what I thought I might need into my adventuring pack. My Tantō was strapped to my backside where I could quickly unsheathe it as always, though an enchanted short sword could only protect against so much on its own, the decent number of combat ready spells I possessed mitigated much of that disadvantage. Overall I didn’t excessively spend my mana reserves, so I should still have had enough juice to deal with anything I might encounter once I exceed the border leading into the Neverfree. Feeling suitably ready for my field trip to the Castle of the Royal sisters, I grabbed my pack and gently heaved it over the windowsill and onto the tile roofing before squeezing my self through and slipping into the black of night.


⁂


I took that opportunity to look up at the late evening sky, the stars glittering in the black background never ceased to astound me. I re-donned my pack before spreading my wings to take off into the chilly night sky and to the edge of the Neverfree to the southeast of the farm. Within a few minutes of flight time, I had reached the fringes of the dreaded forest. I landed on a dirt path protruding past the tree line and followed it into the bowels of the woodland beast. Almost the moment I stepped foot inside, there was this strange feeling brewing in my gut that I was now being observed. I did my best to ignore it and continued undaunted, following the winding path in hopes of it leading to the wooden bridge that gained access to the castle and my objectives. 





I came across an unexpected but very familiar clearing, the same one that I had observed Carrot top and her friends offering sugary tribute to ward off dark spirits. There was a key difference this time though; the statue where the Night Terror once stood was now vacant, the smooth base of the platform leaving no trace of what happened to the stone effigy. I dismissed it as an irrelevant anomaly and waded deeper into the treacherous forest.

‘Don’t know why they would bother calling it that, this place is more like the unholy lovechild of a jungle and a swamp’ I quietly opined to myself as I stepped over a fallen tree trunk and into some lovely thorn bushes.

I kept my right hand close to my weapon at all times, never knowing when I could be ambushed by the many predators that might be hidden within the thick and lush foliage. The light that the crystal in the tiny box lantern emitted did a good job of staving off the darkness, but on the downside, gave away my position to any nearby hungry creatures with functioning eyes. I edged a little too close for comfort next to a boggy pond and almost had my leg chomped into by a creature I could only describe as a Croc made out of rocks. 

I was beginning to have second thoughts about not flying to the castle when my musings were disrupted by the sound of gently flowing water, this was a good sign since it meant that I was nearing the river that ran through the Neverfree and acted as a kind of reference point telling me that I was two thirds of the way there. I had only been briskly walking for roughly an hour so this was a bit of a relief to be sure. 

I was half expecting to run into a river serpent with a fancy mustache, but sadly, no such thing occurred much to my regret. The feeling in my gut I had mentioned earlier had only grown stronger as I put one foot in front of the other, I had at first hypothesized that it was some kind of natural magical deterrent field that kept innocent people away from the Neverfree, but I could sense a malevolent and spiteful aura behind it that told me otherwise. I reached out with my senses to try tracing it back to an originating point, but to my unsettling dismay, felt that the whole of the forest was the origin.





I picked up the pace and eventually lugged my way out of the thicket and nearly over the edge of a deep chasm the second I emerged. Biting down the utterance of several loud and creative invectives, I looked to my left and my right in search of the wooden bridge, spotting it a few dozen meters to my left with the vertex of the castle ruins just beyond that. I spread my wings and surpassed the gap with a couple beats, no way in hell was I going to cross some rickety old bridge with planks covered in mildew and rotting at the fibers, that would be just asking the universe to invoke Murphy’s law.

The shambles of the Neverfree Castle were smack dab in the middle of a large glade in the forest that even after a millennium hadn’t engulfed and devoured the decrepit wreck of a building. It was almost as if the magical echoes of that fateful time in history permanently memorialized the remnants of the castle and kept it shielded against the ravages of time. Closer analysis however regressed much of that line of thinking, the place was clearly in state of disrepair the likes of which even Fix-It Felix, Jr. would shiver at the sight of. There were massive cracks in the foundations, weather erosion had been anything but kind to much of the stonework, it was a wonder that the fragments of stained glass windows were still in the faded condition that they were.

I moved up the steps and towards the large cast iron doors that composed the entrance, there wasn’t a lot of ambient noise in the surroundings to begin with, but it was like the world held its breath as I pushed them open, with a reverberating groan of the unoiled hinges echoing all throughout. I was silently hoping that I hadn’t performed the equivalent of Pippin accidentally pushing an armored carcass down a well and awaking the evils that dwelled within Moria. The entrance hall of the castle itself was rather sparse, its only sentinel being that of a sizable stone pedestal with five flat plates orbiting a sphere. After getting my fill of where the elements were kept, I strode across the tattered carpets and into what seemed to be an open roofed courtyard (though whether or not that was the result of the Night Terror’s renovations were unknown) with a series of hallways and corridors that led who knows where deeper into the sinister ruins.

“I really wish Luna had at least given me a map or something, because I can’t find a directory anywhere in this dump. It’s like the first day of University all over again” I mutedly muttered.

I blew a stray lock of hair out of my vision and did a complex rehearsal of methods for plotting my next course. And by that I mean I played tic tac toe with the entrance lobby’s many archways. One of them eventually had to lead to the Castle library right? From there I could find the book that Luna had attached sentimental value to and hopefully not bump into any ferocious dark spirits on the way there. Wishful thinking right? Anyway, I selected a random corridor on my left and walked that way, the light of my lantern casting aside the shadows and illuminating my way through the dreary wreckage and rubble that dotted much of the floor. Several minivan sized holes in the wall and ceiling that looked like they had been blasted out grimly reminded me of the powers that the Princesses (and by extension myself) wielded. If they were ever misused, senseless death and devastation would be the order of the day; I solemnly vowed to myself that I would only ever use my abilities to further a just cause, one that would not be solely self-serving.

Along the walls of the hallways were portraits and paintings of people and figures long since passed, my knowledge of creepy castles and the like told me to make sure that their eyes weren’t following my movements. But so far as I could tell, they were ordinary oil paintings. At the end of this corridor was a doorway opening into a spiral set of stairs, internally fuming that this place had something in common with the Crystal Citadel, I begrudgingly moseyed down them in my search for the elusive library. My lantern’s light resulting in irregularly shaped shadows while I descended the steps. At the bottom of the stairs was another hallway with imposing ancient suits of empty armor standing guard; the creepy thing was that all of the heads were turned to stare threateningly at me.

“I suddenly have a very disquieting feeling about this” I inauspiciously murmured.

As if on cue, swirling shadows of darkness coalesced through the cracks in the floor and seeped into the armor, the rusted joints scraping together as they moved for the first time in over a millennium. The eye slits of their helmet visors began glowing a sickly yellow as they stepped off of their displays and began to advance on me with spears drawn and leveled on me.

‘I just had to open my big mouth!’ 

I swiftly unsheathed my blade and began using it to quickly prep a series of hard-hitting spells. I tried hurling fireballs at them using pyro kinesis, but the old armor just bore the brunt of it with hardly a scorch mark. Next I tried puncturing the armor with magic projectiles, this mostly succeeded but because there technically wasn’t anybody wearing it, this did little to faze the tin can infantry slowly advancing on my position. It was then that I realized that I had to destroy them entirely, and began gathering my mana reserves for a devastating force spell. The first of the animated armor was within striking range when I let loose with all I had. With the amount of energy I put into the spell, it all but pulverized the metal mob as they were thrown back and disintegrated into small piles of dented plating and chainmail.

I held my position for a few moments longer just to insure that they weren’t going to put themselves together before heaving a sigh of relief, those spears that they were wielding looked really sharp despite their age. I put away my weapon and carefully stepped over the discarded protective coverings to resume my exploration of the castle, Luna’s suspicions of her old seat of power containing the remnants of her dark magics having been confirmed. I hadn’t even made it to the end of the hallway when I felt my left foot sink lower than my right, before I could register that I had just stepped on a pressure plate, a trap door in the floor sprung open its maw and swallowed me up before closing with a grinding rumble. I groaned in discomfort and began dusting myself off; once that was done I observed my new lodgings looking for a way out. From what I could discern, I was now trapped in stone cell of sorts, the only thing contrasting against the walls was a small circular hole that offered a viewport to the canyon wall outside. 

‘I should feel very ashamed that I thought of this as a different kind of room’ I chastised myself, my imagination running away from me for a moment.

I wasn’t able to reprimand myself for long though, because the walls starting closing in on me like the garbage compactor on the first Death Star. I began frantically looking for some kind of means for escape; I didn’t have anything that I could use to halt the progress or prop open the rapidly narrowing walls. If I didn’t think of something soon, I’d become a permanent fixture of this damnable castle.

The walls came together with a resounding crunch.

Respawn in 5…4…3 

Nah I’m kidding, I concluded that my only viable way out was by exploiting the structural weaknesses in the wall with the hole. I concentrated my magic and let it flow into the many creaks and cracks in the fortified partition in front of me. I willed it to make like a balloon and expand, the aged wall began splintering further before altogether crumbling and enabling me to leap out just as the deathtrap shut in on itself. I fell for a couple seconds before summoning my wings and touching down gently on the canyon floor. It was dank and dreary down there to be certain, the fog having settled at the bottom and shrouding all in its heavy blanket. I could hardly see five feet in front of me, but before I could fly up and back into the maze of horrific clichés that was the Neverfree castle, the fog began mysteriously clearing. Although I really wish it hadn’t, because when the misty curtain was pulled aside, it revealed the canyon’s macabre contents.

There were corpses partly buried in the mushy mud everywhere, all partially rotted to the point where bone was clearly visible. They were remarkably well persevered despite probably being hundreds of years old, and based on what was left of their clothing and gear, the bodies belonged to those who came before me. Ill-fated adventurers, archeologists looking to study the ancient castle, even the original members of the castle’s attendants who must have been cast down during the calamitous clash between the royal sisters. But that couldn’t have been correct because of the other deceased people entombed here; they had to have been moved down here by something, but by what? To my ever increasing dread, I discovered that the eyes and mouths of those that still retained enough flesh on their faces had been sown shut, a black ichor flowing through gaps in the stitching like the tears of the perished.

Just when I thought it couldn’t get it any more ghastly, there was an unholy sounding resonance that vibrated the air and bid the dead to slowly rise and drag themselves towards me in several dozen droves, all moaning in agony as they came, some warning me to run and save myself. This indicated that they were still sentient and very much aware of what they were doing, which now made me despise the dark spirits more than I ever had previously. I had my Tantō in my hand faster than lightning and began to ignite a fire spell in my other. So far it hadn’t proven effective on an inorganic enemy, but I had a feeling that wouldn’t be the case with people who should have been cremated long ago. With a flicker of deleterious intent in my eyes, I unleash my hell storm, sending the whirlwind of fire barreling into the undead legion and expeditiously turning them into charred ashes. I coupled my pyro kinesis with my blade and wreathed it in flame as to finish off the rest; I rushed headlong into the traipsing throng of those that remained and ended their suffering with a series of swings, hacks, and slashes that severed them limb from limb and set what was left alight.

I stood silently in the aftermath of the dying flames feeling more grim than usual, this whole time there were the souls of the deceased trapped here and no one even knew it. Worse yet, the dark spirits that I came to vanquish had been using them, most likely feeding off of the misery and woe of those who could not join their loved ones in eternal rest, and even having the gall to pit them against me once they were located and the secret was out. I ascended the depths of the canyon with a newfound resolve to destroy this dark enemy of mine with extreme prejudice. I repeated the words of power that Luna imparted me with in my mind. ‘Reprimo, Expurgate, Deleo’ all Latin, all relating to the notion of restraining and purging something unwanted. I did not wonder about the fascinating similarities and differences our worlds shared this time, nay instead I steeled myself to use the spell taught to me to end a threat to life and liberty once and for all.

I flew above the ramparts of the castle in search of an entry point, finding more than plenty of them in the roof. I picked one near the center of the castle and dived inside, finding myself in some kind of chamber that was narrow by the doorway but expanded to accommodate a large brass pipe organ with tall and unlit candelabras on either side of it. I don’t know why, but I felt compelled to see if it was still in working order. Walking up to the dusty keyboard, I pressed down on one of the ivories and was rewarded with a shrill high pitch tone, the pipe connected to it expelling steam and blowing away masses of cobwebs that had accumulated over the years. I grinned to myself, perhaps I could get my quarry to come to me, what’s more aggravating than having someone cause a racket in your home after all?

I sat down on the worn leather organ bench and popped a few joints in my knuckles; I could just pretend to be a monkey and pound away at the keyboard to produce a cacophony of noise. But I was a little more refined than that, instead I bathed my appendages in my magic and reactivated my muscle memory spell, letting it guide my movements as my fingers glided over the keys and my feet worked the pedals accordingly. This piece was as fitting as it was exceedingly haunting, I dare say even Davy Jones couldn’t have done a better job (and he had a tentacle beard to perform it with!). The dark clouds hovering over the Neverfree must have merged into storm clouds as some point, because it began to pour through the aperture in the ceiling almost the moment I began to play. I wasn’t paying that much attention to anything beyond the organ, but I was able to make out cranking and whirring noises coming from all corners of the keep, mechanisms that hadn’t be used in forever were suddenly being put through their paces like race horses at the Kentucky derby.

When the final notes of the piece rang out with a piercing dissonance, I leaned back into my seat and exhaled a weary puff of air, even if the song didn’t have an effect; it still allowed for me (and the organ) to vent some steam, so there was at least that. A concatenation of light thumps that slowly grew louder with each passing second caught my ear, it seemed that my plan had worked and my enemy had answered my call so to speak. But I hadn’t been expecting them to physically show up, I quickly got to my feet and spun around to face my opponent. The puddle of water that had built up due to the rain was rippling with every heavily laden step that rapped against the eroded stonework. The swirling darkness from before began streaming through the doorway in small rivulets of ebony before a pair of intimidating stony legs stopped just shy of the archway. They promptly began moving and soon an uncomfortably familiar looking statue burst through the doorway and into the chamber, clouds of powdered rock spreading out before settling onto the linoleum.

“Huh, so that’s where it went” I idly thought out loud, analyzing upon this formidable foe for any hint of a weakness.

The statue itself was almost twice as large as myself and modeled after the Night Terror, meaning that it was clad from head to toe in serrated stony armor. The animate sculpture was also wielding a massive halberd that looked like it had been ripped off of the many weapon racks that had been hanging on the hallway walls. The uncanniest thing about this golem however, was its lack of a face. When Luna became the Night Terror, she donned a smooth metal mask that hid her features away from the world, for if none could appreciate the beauty of her night, then none would see her own beauty whatsoever. Historical anecdotes aside, I tried latching onto the statue with my magic to begin the vanquish spell, only to find it like grabbing a greased bar of soap. I growled in frustration, these spirits weren’t going to leave without a fight it seemed, a fight where they could try to stack the odds in their favor.

I drew my weapon and lowered myself into a combat stance, the statue immediately charged and heaved its sizable halberd overhead for a downward swing, one that I rolled to the side in order to dodge. The sharp end of the halberd cleaving the organ bench I had sat on clean in two and lodging itself firmly into the flooring. I slashed at the knees of the possessed statue, only for the blade to scratch against its surface and elicit a torrent of sparks. I swore loudly as the golem tried to batter me with swing of its forearm and jumped back. I was not in a good spot to put up much of a fight, my blade couldn’t do much to damage it, I had to save the remainder of my magic if I was to succeed in casting the vanquish spell, and I hadn’t even found the castle library yet. The enormous and hefty looking metallic chandelier that hung from the ceiling gave me an idea to work with though; I taunted the statue into charging me again.

“Hey rock head! The haunted mansion called… they want their banalities back!” I shouted, not knowing if it could even hear me to begin with, let alone understand that reference.

Whether or not it heard me, it started to stomp its way toward me again none the less. I compromised with myself and charged up both hands with a small but concentrated cryo kinetic spell and ran to meet the statue head on, I baseball slid under its large gait and cast my spell at both its feet, turning them into club shaped icicles and disabling its movement as it skid and tripped over itself awkwardly. The head of the statue reviewed its now stuck limbs and tried to free itself by chipping at the ice with the spear end of the halberd. Knowing that I didn’t have long, I opened my adventuring pack and took out the grappling hook that Gizmo sold to me.

‘I knew I’d find a use for this’ 

I adjusted the knob on the pommel and brought the device to bear before aiming it at the arms of the chandelier and squeezing the trigger, the device firing the hook at an impressive speed and whirling it around one of the chandelier arms right above the immobile statue. I hurriedly checked the line to make sure it was secure before gripping it with both hands and heaving with all my might. The supports keeping the chandelier anchored to the ceiling had weakened significantly with time and my Trifect strength proved more than enough to bring the whole thing crashing down on the contemptible golem with a deafening thud and reducing both into a cluttered mess. Not wasting a second, I reached out with what was left of my magical reserves, and with it took hold of the dark spirits, who tried to flee with haste.

“You are a blight upon this fair world, a blight which I will now erase” I began to incant the words of power and actually felt it surging into my magical grip and directly into the spirits, who I could actually feel writhing in justly deserved torment.

“Reprimo, Expurgate, Deleo. Begone foul spirits!” I ordered, the squirming of the dark essences subsiding before disappearing entirely with a final and wicked sounding chorus of wails, then all was silent save for the pattering of the rain and occasional crack of thunder from outside.

My shoulders slumped downwards and I realized just how tired I was from working all day and narrowly avoiding premature expiration by night. I sighed tiredly, and I still had to find Luna’s accursed diary. I dragged my feet out of the ruined chambers after recollecting the loosened ropes of the grappling hook and into the hallways. Another hour of tedious searching later, and I was finally among the books of the castle’s grand library, I found a nice wooden chair and sat down before leaning back and putting my feet up on the table. My relaxing was interrupted by the sound of clanking gears as a bookshelf rolled itself apart to reveal a hidden doorway.

“Really? A doorway hidden behind a bookshelf? I need to have a serious conversation with Luna and Celestia about architectural clichés and why they’re bad” I shook my head and followed it inside. 

The doorway revealed a smaller private library with an eye catching book placed conspicuously on top of a pedestal in the center of the cubbyhole. I took the book in my hands and examined the cover after I dusted it off of a spider with a star pattern on its abdomen; it depicted a thin metal silhouette of each princess holding up their respective astral body. I opened it up and read a couple pages to confirm that it was indeed the book that Luna asked me to retrieve, having to stifle a chuckle at how free spirited the Royal sisters were when they weren’t putting on their rigid regal demeanors in front of their subjects. 

I put the item in my pack and was about to vamoose when another thing caught my eye, just behind the pedestal was a medium sized and elaborately decorated chest that was just begging to be looted. I gave into my vault hunter desires and sauntered over to flip it open and see what its contents held, inside were a myriad of things, two ornately decorated metal bracers that I proceeded to fit onto my forearms. I noticed a strange mechanism on the bottom of my right wrist that looked a lot like…

‘It couldn’t be, could it?’ Only one way to find out.

I flicked my wrist forward and watched in astonished awe as a blade extended about seven and half inches outwards with a distinctive ‘shuerk!’. I relaxed my wrist and the blade retracted back into the bracer’s sheath, somewhere in the back of my mind the trumpets of a certain Woodkid song began blaring dramatically. I tried the same thing with the other bracer and got the same exact result. I was now the proud new owner of a pair of hidden blades.

“…Sweet…” 

I examined the other articles in the chest, the next item was a less inspiring bag with gunmetal grey shards inside that I placed in my pack for further inspection at a later time. And just for all of my toils, the last item in the chest was a large bag positively full to the brim with invaluable and flawlessly cut gems that glinted even in the soft light of my lantern crystal. 





Satisfied with my spoils, I exited the cubbyhole and walked up the library stairs that led out onto a balcony overgrown with vegetation, which overlooked much of the rampantly growing and dangerous Neverfree. The rainstorm from earlier had finally passed and the night sky was visible once again. I paused to gaze upon it for a second time, lost in thought and self-reflection. I sensed an overwhelming gathering of presences looming behind me and instantly spun around with my new wrist blades flicked out and ready to go. 

But what I saw was not my enemy come back to haunt me; instead I was face to faces with the ghostly specters of men and women who were smiling at me. I deduced that these were the spirits of the people whose bodies I had destroyed with my great conflagration back on the canyon floor, but instead of looking decayed like their bodies had, they looked as clean and pristine as they were in life.

“Why do you persist? You are free now. Go and find peace in the hereafter” I gently urged them.

In response they dissolved into a snow-white gale that passed through me, the sensations that they invoked were impossible to accurately describe, consisting of memories, thoughts, and feelings that were not my own. But I could hear them all whispering in my ear, ‘Thank you’ before finally departing for greener pastures and leaving me in stunned wonderment. By now the night had grown late and it would barely be a few hours before Celestia rose the Sun and Luna lowered her moon and the Apple family noticed that my room was empty. I flew back to the farmhouse with all possible speed and deposited my things through my still opened window and following suit. I didn’t even bother taking a shower or changing into more comfortable nightwear before throwing myself onto my bed and passing out, my last thought being somewhere along the lines of…

‘Glad I’m jaded, otherwise I’d probably have nightmares about some of the things I witnessed this night for the rest of the week!’