//------------------------------//
// Rivals to the End 
// Story: Sofa, So Good 
// by GWFan 
//------------------------------//

    “Darn it,” Rainbow Dash said in frustration.  “I had a golden opportunity right in my hooves and I blew it.”
“Why would anypony even put a feature like that into a sofa?” Spike complained.
The two of them sat down miserably onto their beloved sofa, the one it seemed they would never get to sit on otherwise.  As they sat, Davenport came out from the backroom again.
“Ah, good.  I see you fixed the window up,” Davenport said, referring to the broken window that Rainbow and Spike had just spent the last twenty minutes placing a temporary wooden board, over.  “Any news on the vandal who threw that rock?”
Rainbow and Spike sat up straighter and shook their heads.
“Nope.  The culprit is still at large,” Spike lied, too afraid to reveal the truth. 
Davenport shook his head.  “Who would do such a thing?  Ponyville’s changed since I was a colt.”  Dash and Spike grimaced, afraid he would start talking about his foalhood again.  Instead, Davenport changed the subject.  “Any customers come in wanting quills and sofas?”
The two rival employees looked at each other.  When Lyra had been jettisoned out the window, there had been a brief commotion outside.  But since then, all had been quiet as a tomb.  They both hung their heads.
“It really has been a slow day,” Davenport said, sounding a bit more worried than he had earlier.  “Well, just keep at it.  I’m sure somepony will come in wanting my quills and sofas sooner or later.  I hope.”  Davenport’s face looked even longer than a normal pony’s did.  “Maybe I need to start selling another product or something,” he said as he turned back to the backroom.  Just before he walked through the door, he raised his hoof in the air.  “Deodorant!  Everypony loves deodorant.  Yes, Quills, Sofas, and Deodorant.  I like the sound of that.”
As soon as Davenport was safely in his backroom, Rainbow Dash and Spike let out a sigh of relief.  Maybe this whole free sofa thing wasn’t so great after all.
After a few moments of silence, Spike looked at Rainbow Dash.  “Hey uh… thanks for not telling him how the window got broken.” 
Rainbow gave him a small smile.  “Aww, no problem.  I wouldn’t have wanted to win that way anyway.”  The two shared a meager laugh before they stared at the floor again.  “Soooooo, what do you want the sofa for anyway?” Rainbow asked suddenly.
“Cause I think I’m grown up enough to not sleep in a basket anymore.  I can’t get Twilight to buy me a bed, but I’m sure she wouldn’t mind a sofa if it’s free.  I mean, it’s a start to my own real bed, right?”
Rainbow snickered.  “Ha.  Guess I’m not the only one with a stupid reason.”  Spike looked at her questioningly.  “Oh well, you see, one of the Wonderbolts bought this same sofa and I sorta though it would be cool to own the same thing as one of my idols.  Pretty silly huh?”
“Yeah,” Spike agreed, snickering back briefly.  “We’re kind of pathetic, huh?  Fighting over a sofa and all.  I mean, they’ll be other sofas.”
“Totally,” Rainbow said confidently.  “It’s not like this sofa holds all my hopes and dreams in it.”  They both laughed awkwardly and quiet obviously fake.  Then the entrance bell rang.
They both stood up off the sofa quickly.  “Welcome to…,” they started but stopped when they saw who it was.
“I don’t even think you guys could afford a sofa,” Rainbow said to the two young unicorns who had just walked in.
“Sofa?  We didn’t come here just for the sofa,” Snips said.
“Though I bet it’s awesome,” Snails added.
“We came for the job offer,” Snips finished.
“Job offer?” Rainbow and Spike said stupidly.
“Yeah.  Like it says on the sign outside,” Snips said as if it were the most obvious thing.
“But, why would you…?” Spike started to ask.
“Cause free stuff is cool,” Snails said happily.
Dash and Spike looked at each other briefly before saying together, “The position has been filled.”
“Awwwwwww,” Snips and Snails said, clearly disappointed.
“That’s the way the sofa bounces,” Spike said innocently.
“And I was really hoping to get that sofa,” Snips said disappointed.
“Hey, what is a quill anyway?” Snails asked as they started to walk out of the store.
“It’s the spiny things on the back of those porky-pine animals,” Snips explained.
“That’s silly.  Why would anypony want to buy that?” Snails commented.
As soon as the two colts had gone, Spike’s eyes gravitated to the sign that was still in the window.  “I didn’t even think of that.  What if somepony else wants to get the job?  Somepony who knows how to sell sofas,” he said worriedly.
“Somepony who would have the gall to take my sofa away?” Dash said angrily.
“What do you mean your sofa?  I want that sofa,” Spike chimed in.  
Once again, the not so fated rivalry started up as Dash and Spike butted heads, and growled at each other.  Then the front entrance bell rang again.
“Bye boys,” Twilight Sparkle said, calling after Snips and Snails.
“Twilight!” Dash and Spike said, realizing they had another golden opportunity.
“Huh?” Twilight looked at them.  “What are you two doing here?”
Rainbow and Spike smiled at the lavender unicorn.  “Welcome to Quills and Sofas,” they said enthusiastically.
Twilight’s ears pointed back in confusion.  “You guys work here?”
“No.  But I will,” They both answered simultaneously.
“What do you mean you…,” Twilight began but then she started to understand.  “Wait, don’t tell me you lied to Snips and Snails about the job offer?” 
“Uh… well…,” Spike stammered, rubbing the back of his neck.
“I can’t believe you two.  That was so mean.  And is this where you’ve been all day?  You missed Pinkie Pie’s picnic.  We waited for you.”
“I know.  We’ll apologize later.  You want to buy a sofa?” Spike asked.
“A sofa- No!  Spike, not that again.  I’m not buying you a sofa.  In fact, I already bought your new basket.”
“You sure you don’t want to buy a sofa?” Rainbow Dash asked, smiling wildly.
“Uh…,” Twilight stared at her, clearly not expecting the question to come from her.  “Why do you-”
“Come on bestest best friend in all of Equestria.  You know you want buy a sofa.”
“Not really,” Twilight said slowly, starting to feel a little creeped out by Spike and Rainbow’s smiling faces.  “And you know, bestest, isn’t actually a word-”
“Come on Twilight.  You woke up this morning and said to yourself, I want to buy a sofa today.  I know, cause I heard you.  Why else would you be here?” Spike said, nonchalantly.
“I came to buy a few extra quills.  I was planning to catch up on some of my reports tonight-”
“You don’t need quills,” Rainbow Dash said, waving her hoof dismissively.
“Yeah.  You can just borrow some from Owlowiscious whenever you want,” Spike added.
“I can’t keep borrowing quills from Owlowiscious.  He would go bald,” Twilight protested.
“Bald,” Spike snorted, suppressing a laugh.  “But seriously, you need a sofa to sit on while you work.”
“But I-”
“Of course you do,” Rainbow jumped in.  “And I’m the pony you’re going to buy it from.”
“Unless of course, you want to buy it from your number one assistant, who always helps out around the library every day, day in and day out.”
“Oooookay,” Twilight said nervously while backing up slowly.  “I’m just going to come back later-”
“Come on Twilight.  Just look around a little.  It can’t hurt,” Spike pleaded.
“And when you’ve found something, just come find me,” Rainbow said. 
“Well, uh…,”
“Or you can come find me,” Spike added quickly.  
“I really don’t want to buy a sofa, guys.  Honestly,” Twilight said nervously.
Clearly, their efforts weren’t working.  If they didn’t do something fast, Twilight was going to make a hasty exit.  It was then that Spike realized something.  Something that gave him a devilish smile.  “Ahem,” he spoke up.  “Of course, if you buy a sofa, you’ll get our special offer too.”
“Special offer?” Rainbow looked at him quizzically.  “What special offer?”
Spike looked clearly proud of himself as he said, “Today only, it’s buy one get one free for any sofa.  But only if you buy from me.”
“Since when did-” Dash started to say, before she realized just what he was implying, “That’s not fair!  You can’t offer that!”
“Oh, but I can,” Spike answered, smiling evilly at Dash.  “Cause it’s technically true.”
“You little cheater,” Rainbow uttered through clenched teeth.
“Wow.  That is a great offer,” Twilight said a little more methodical.  “But still-”
“It’s an offer you just can’t ignore.  You’d have to be crazy to pass up an offer like this,” Spike said, spinning his eyes like Ditzy Doo.
“Yeah but… if uh… I mean if you…,” Rainbow was at a complete loss.  Spike had played a trump card she couldn’t possibly match.  Not if she wanted to keep her free sofa anyway.
“How about this nice sofa over here.”  Spike walked over to a random sofa that happened to be relatively inexpensive.  
“You’re right.  I guess it couldn’t hurt to at least look,” Twilight said, finally walking further into the store.
Rainbow looked around the store for something, anything that could help her.  Spike had to be stopped.  But how?  Then her eyes fell on a display of quills.  “What about your quills?” she blurted out.  Twilight stopped and looked at her.  “If you buy a sofa, you won’t be able to afford your quills, right?”
“I guess.”
“Why miss out on a night of studying and… whatever it is else you do, because you don’t have quills?  You don’t need a sofa.” 
“Wha…!” Spike gaped.  “Of course she needs a sofa.  What if a guest wants to spend the night, tonight?”
“Then that pony could just sleep on the guest bed,” Twilight said as if it were the obvious answer.
“Well, what if… wait… we have a guest bed?”  
“Yeah.  It’s in the storage room.  The only time it’s been used was when I had that slumber party with Applejack and Rarity.  That reminds me, we still need to have another slumber party.”
“We have a storage room?” Spike said dumbfounded.  “Why can’t I just sleep on that bed?”
“We’ve been over this Spike.  You’re still a baby dragon.”
“That’s right,” Rainbow Dash chimed in.  “You’re just a wittle baby dwagon,” She mocked.  “You’re too young for a great big bed or a scary sofa.”
“I am not,” Spike fumed.  “Forget the bed.  This buy one get one free offer is for today only and only for the next customer who buys,” Spike said, giving Dash an evil eye.  “You sure you don’t want to take advantage of this once in a lifetime offer, Twilight?  You might need a sofa in the future.”
“That is a good point,” Twilight said, thinking.
“Of course she doesn’t need the offer.  Not at this store,” Rainbow said, grabbing up Twilight by the tail.
“Rainbow!  Hey!  What are you doing?  Put me down.”
“Just look at the poor quality of these sofas.”  Dash dropped Twilight on top of the firm sofa.  She landed with a prompt and expected, ‘ouch.’  “These sofas are hard as rocks.  Why would anypony want one?”
Twilight sat up in a daze.  She had hit her head so hard, she could practically see stars.  Orion was floating around her head.
“I don’t even know why we have this stupid thing,” Spike commented as he picked Twilight up and carried her over to a sofa bed that already had the bed unfolded.  “But this sofa over here is nothing like that one.”  Spike tossed her onto the bed like Mario tossing a vegetable at a shy guy.  “It’s not only comfortable, but it folds out into a-” Just as Twilight landed on it, the bed folded back up into a sofa with the poor unicorn still inside it.  “…bed,” Spike finished slowly.
Rainbow Dash rolled around on the ground, laughing.  If Spike kept this up, she wouldn’t have to do anything.  
Twilight groaned from within the sofa.  Somehow, she managed to squeeze her head out.  “You know what?  I don’t think this is such a good idea.”
“Nonsense.  You just haven’t found the right one.  What you need is… to relax!” Spike said cheerfully.  He pulled Twilight out of the sofa bed by her head and dragged her over to the sofa with all the buttons in the arm.
“Hey, what’s so great about that one?” Rainbow asked, flying over.  It was the only sofa she hadn’t attempted to sell yet.
“This is the coolest sofa in the store,” Spike said, setting Twilight onto it carefully.  Though Twilight was sitting on her haunches, she did look somewhat comfortable, if not a little dizzy from the last two sofas.  “Just check out its awesome features.”  He pressed a random button and the whole thing laid out flat.  “Whoops, not that one.”  He tried another button.  The sofa started to rock back and forth at a good pace, shaking up Twilight to the point that she almost fell off.
“Ooooooooh,” Rainbow said, a bit more intrigued by the sofa.  “What does this button do?”  She pressed a large, shiny button beneath all the smaller ones. 
“Full service mode,” a mechanical voice said.   The sofa bolted upright.
“What now?” Twilight said alarmed.  Strangely though, soft pleasing music started to play from somewhere in the sofa.  Well, that wasn’t so bad.  Abruptly the sofa started vibrating.  It was actually kind of relaxing.  That is, until Twilight realized that the sofa was heating up and she was starting to sweat.  Then it suddenly reclined and started to rock back and forth again, though this time, more gently.  Then a series of panels opened up and Twilight witnessed several combs, hoof files, and some kind of sharp looking object, reaching for her.
“Stop!  Stop!  I’ll buy it!  I’ll buy it!” Twilight shouted.
“You’ll buy?”  Rainbow and Spike said in shock.
“Yes!  I’ll buy!  Just please stop!”  Twilight yelled as the sharp object loomed closer.
For a moment, utter silence filled the store.  But not for long.  Spike jumped up and down victoriously.  “Yes!  Yes!  I sold a sofa!”
“What!?  Did I hear you say you sold a sofa!?” Davenport exploded out of the back room.
“Yeah!  I totally sold a sofa!” Spike cheered.
“Nice one!  Aw…,” Davenport tried to celebrate but the bandages around his ribs caused him too much pain.  “I’ll go get the paperwork,” he said, wincing in pain.
As Davenport marched stiffly into the backroom, Rainbow Dash sat dumbly on the ground, watching Spike congratulate himself.  “I can’t believe it.  I lost.  I actually…,” Dash waned to cry, but there was no use. 
Spike in the meantime, danced in place, swinging his arms around and singing, “I got two sofas.  I got two sofas.”
“Noooooooo!” Twilight screamed as the sharp object clipped off her bangs.



“Gosh, I’m sorry,” Fluttershy apologized to Rainbow Dash as they sat around another of Pinkie Pie’s picnics.  “If I had known I would have bought a sofa from you.  Actually, then Spike would have been sad and I would have felt bad.  Then I should have bought a sofa from him.  Oh, but then you’d still have lost.  Um…,” Fluttershy noticed Rainbow’s face getting longer and longer as she spoke.  “I’m sorry.  Are you mad?”
Rainbow sighed and looked at her normally quiet friend.  “No.  Not really.  Just kind of disappointed.” 
“Ah, cheer up Dashie,” Pinkie Pie said, offering her friend a cupcake.  “I’m sure you’ll find another sofa.”
Rainbow snorted as she accepted the cupcake.  “Oh yeah,” she said sarcastically.  “Another free sofa is gonna drop into my lap any second now.”
Abruptly, Pinkie shuddered.  “Oh!  Twitchy twitch!  Twitchy tail!”
“What?”  No sooner had Dash voiced her question, a sofa suddenly dropped out of the sky right in between the three friends.  A sofa and a pony.
The pegasus pony on the sofa groaned.  “Not again.”
“Whoops.  My bad,” A certain grey pegasus in the sky apologized.
“S-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sofa?” Rainbow said in confusion.
“Uh, hi.”  Dash turned and she saw Spike waving sheepishly.  “This isn’t exactly what I had in mind but I guess it works.”
“Spike,” Twilight said sternly, walking up behind him.  The group of ponies noticed that she sported a bold new haircut.
“Wh…what… what’s the meaning of this?  Why is the sofa here?”  Rainbow demanded, thinking that he was making fun of her.
“Isn’t it obvious?” Spike said.
“Spike!” Twilight scolded.
“Okay, okay.  Sheesh,” Spike said pushing Twilight away.  “I’m sorry about the way I acted yesterday.  I guess I kind of lost my head when you started making fun of me.”
Dash blushed.  “Uh, no.  That was my bad.  I wasn’t being very cool either.”
“I really do feel bad about it and all.  I know how much this sofa means to you.  So, I thought maybe I would give it to you.”
“You want to give it to me!?” Rainbow said excitedly.  “That’s awesome!”  Then she saw the annoyed expression on Twilight’s face, coupled with her new haircut.  “I mean... that’s cool and all.  But…,” Dash sighed again.  “In all seriousness, I want to say sorry too.  I really shouldn’t have gotten so uptight about this silly sofa.”
“Yeah.  Me too, “Spike said.  Then he added, “Besides, I’ve still got that cool sofa with all the buttons on it.”
Dash smirked.  “Oh you little jerk.”
“You’re the jerk,” Spike smirked back.
“Oh guys, come on,” Twilight started to say, but then Rainbow and Spike started laughing.  Twilight hadn’t even realized they were joking with each other.
“So, friends?” Spike said, after they had had a good laugh.
“Since when were we not?” Dash said with a smile.
“I’m still in a little pain here,” the pegasus who had dropped with the sofa, complained.
“Cupcake?” Pinkie offered him.
The pegasus stared at her for a moment before taking the cupcake and saying, “Sure.  Why not.”
“Well I certainly hope you two have learned something from all this,” Twilight spoke up.  “Because I sure have.”  Spike and Rainbow looked at her quizzically.  “Spike, take a letter.”
“Will do.”  Spike pulled out a piece of paper from somewhere.  Then he poked around the rest of his invisible pockets.  “Uh… does anypony have a quill I could borrow?”
“No.  But I know where you could get one.”  Rainbow laughed.
“Okay, we’ll write it down later,” Twilight said a little amused.  “What I did learn though is that having a rival doesn’t mean you can’t still be friends.”  Then she smirked and added, “And also, that you shouldn’t let a sofa come between you.”  They all laughed as Spike and Dash sat in the sofa together, knowing they would always have a funny story to tell about it.
“One thing bugs me though,” Spike suddenly said.
“What’s that?” Rainbow asked.
“Why do I have the feeling like we’re forgetting something?”
In another part of town, in a certain store, a certain earth pony tapped his hoof impatiently.  “Where the hay is my new employee!” He screamed.


The End