//------------------------------// // Prologue: Going To Hell In A Casket // Story: You Wouldn't Happen To Be The Jarl Would You? // by SCP Pinkamena //------------------------------// *SPLASH!* "Oh great... you're stuck in a coffin in the middle of river. Way to go, Jerry. What could be worse?" His ear perked a bit when he heard a rumbling roar. "BY TALOS! WHEN WILL MY BAD LUCK END!" One Hour Earlier... "You'll be so much easier to rob when you're— Oh, it's just you." The bandit said putting away her axe. "What do mean 'It's just me'? Do bandits really not want to mess with anymore?" The man complained. "Yes, actually." The bandit told him before walking away into the mountain side. He was stunned to say the least, a bandit not wanting to do anything to him? Well, yeah he defeated Alduin but other than that he was just another normal guy! He sighed and took off Volsung, a mask that he acquired by involuntarily killing a Dragon Priest, and rubbed his forehead. He replaced his mask and made his way towards... somewhere. Ever since the defeat of Alduin, no one wanted to pick a fight with him. Not even the Brotherhood and their assassins wanted anything to do anything with him. It was... unusual. Normally, he would laugh off things like this. But now... He didn't like it. At all. When ever he went to do small mercenary work, he felt the thrill again, but only for a little bit. There were times where he called out her name and when he didn't see her... "Hahahaha! Lydia, when you said you were a Thane, I didn't know you meant, 'Give me an axe and make me angry, see what happens' type of girl!" the Dragonborn called from over his shoulder. "Well, it's not everyday that—HeeeRAGH!— one finds herself in the middle of a Vampire cave!" Lydia called back, blocking the incoming sword and swiping back with her battle axe. The Vampire fell limp and fell to the ground, as he and Lydia sheathed there weapons. "Hmmm... Lydia, do me a favor and find anything of value. I'll look around and make sure that there's no one else in here." He said and after a 'sure' and a nod he looked in the other rooms of the cave. He found one Vampire sitting in his chair reading a book. Taking out a small iron dagger, he began slowly creeping towards him he turned his knife pommel up and plunged in down into the Vampires head, killing him instantly. When he stood up he reached inside of his pockets grabbing an amount of 50 gold septims. He turned his attention to the table to see what books he had, and it had turned out that 'The Lusty Argonian Maid' was a very popular book. With a bright red face that was thankfully hidden behind his mask, he turned around to leave. "Lydia! C'mon we're going to White—" "AHHHGG!!" He eyes widened. "Lydia!" He ran back to the main chamber and fast as he could before the horrible sight met his eyes. Lydia stood with a blade poking out of her chest and the one responsible was still clinging to the grip. The Dragonborn ran towards the Vampire with his own sword and stabbed her through and and through killing her almost instantly. Lydia whimpered and fell too, but was caught as he launched his out and grabbed her. "Some adventure hey?" She said with a smile, albeit a painful one. "Jericho—" "Don't call me that... you know not to..." He said as she pulled his mask off and tears fell from his and landed on her face. "As... as a T-thane... I'm sworn to pr-protect you no matter what..." She was right, but he wanted her to be wrong. Her hand found his and guided it back to the blade's handle. "Pull it out." She said. He choked back a sob closed his eyes tight before he pulled the sword out of her and watched as she slowly went pale. He moved her hair out of the way and gave her a kiss on the forehead and put her own sword into her hands. "May you have a safe journey to Sovngarde." She gave a little laugh. "I'm going to Sovngarde? I thought I already was!" Then she closed her eyes and her chest stopped rising... He finally couldn't hold back any longer. He cried long and hard at her death, yelling and screaming that it should of been him and not her. He had lost a good friend that day, and no one could replace her. He suddenly had to fight back tears and continued his way. He ran into a few Forsworn caravans, which he decimated. He ran into a few Trolls and he killed them without a second though. Twas a normal day for Jericho, also known as the Dragonborn. He sighed deeply and before he even noticed it an arrow struck his side. I didn't go very deep, but deep enough to something. Slowly, he pulled out the arrow and noticed a small white substance on it. The only thing he remembered was what said substance was before he fell over unconscious. "Hehehe... Even the Dragonborn has a few weaknesses," A clearly male voice said, "And to think, all it took was just a mixture of slow poison and paralysis poison?" He picked up Jericho and put him in a horse drawn cart before he took off with him. Summer Sun Celebration: Equestria "Today's Summer Sun Celebration will be canceled until further notice." Celestia said earning a mix of shock, confusion, and disappointment. "But," and a pinch of hope, "You may still enjoy the festivities. Just keep in mind that celebration will continue when the matter is dealt with." She said before winking out and popping back into the castle. Her brow furrowed and her palms were sweaty as she looked at the coffin in front of her and her guards. As she was ordering the guards, a sudden thump resounded from the coffin. Everyone stopped and stared at it and it jumped again. Everyone watched closely as a small blade, most likely a dagger, popped out from the side and traveled its way up to find the first nail. It traveled more downwards to find the second one. The blade retracted itself and then there was silence once again. FUS RO DAH! An amazing shout and wave of energy destroyed the lid of the coffin and a strange creature covered in black armor and a weird bronze mask covered by a hood stood up out of it. He sheathed his dagger and looked at the guards who had their spears and swords pointed at him. Jericho turned around to see Princess Celestia staring at him with a shocked expression. He cleared his throat. "You... wouldn't happen to be the Jarl would you?"