//------------------------------// // The Dark Mare // Story: Epic Crossover Time: The Equestrian Princesses // by scarves-n-converse //------------------------------// Luna stirred to awareness. The ground she lay on was cold and hard, like stone. Her eyes opened, and she realized she was, in fact, lying on stone. Lying on stone in a humungous cave, with a large computer screen, and tons of gadgets of all kinds. Where was she? "Luna!" A familiar voice rang through the cave. Luna rose and ran to her sister, who was just entering the scene. "Tia! You're here too!" Celestia nodded. "But..." she said, gesturing toward her attire, which was a black formal suit with a bow tie. "I'm not sure about these clothes." Then the alicorn pointed her hoof toward Luna. "Even you have some kind of... outfit on." The azure alicorn looked down to see that she was clothed in a black leather suit, with an insignia of a bat surrounded by a yellow oval on the chest. It was at that moment that Luna realized where the two sisters were. "Tia... I think we're in Gothamare City." "Where?" "Sister, you know I read comics all the time. One of my favorites is Batmare." Luna raised her hoof to her chest and boldly declared, "Defender of the night and righter of wrongdoings!" Celestia rolled her eyes. "Well," the white pony started. "You're obviously Batmare, with that outfit. But... who am I?" Suddenly, a face appeared on the huge computer screen. "Callin' Batmare! Come in, Batmare!" exclaimed the pony, who looked similar to Twilight's dear friend, Applejack; at least Celestia thought. Luna stepped forward, completely in character. "Yes, Commissioner?" "Your arch-nemesis Double-Mug and the Complex Conundrum are attemptin' to take over the city!" "Figures," Batmare replied. "How are they doing it?" The Commissioner frantically answered, "They've built a 'Doom Ray' that turns ponies two-faced!" Celestia tilted her head. "'Two-faced'? What is that supposed to mean?" "The good, law-abidin' citizens of Gothamare are gonna go rampagin' through the whole darned city, robbin' banks, robbin' other ponies, the whole enchilada!" "Great Scott!" Luna exclaimed. Celestia tried not to roll her eyes at the cheesy line that had just escaped her little sister's mouth. "Great Scott is right!" Commissioner Jack agreed. "They haven't used their evil device yet, but they vow to if the city doesn't give them a large amount of bits!" "What a dastardly feat!" Batmare stomped her hoof. "I will stop them as soon as I can!" "Good! And take your butler, Alice, with you! She may be able to aid you with her--" The screen blacked out. Celestia cried, "Holy cut-offs! She's gone!" Luna snickered. "Oh, Tia, you're not supposed to say the 'holy' quotes!" Celestia was confused, but she followed her sister out of the entrance of the cave. The two immediately took flight, scouring the city for the two devious criminals. The ivory alicorn asked her sister, "So, if we are in this world, I wonder if Cadance and Twilight made it, too?" Luna gasped. "They did." Then, directing her hoof toward the ground, Batmare pointed out two ponies. One was an alicorn, with the right side of her looking like the typical form of Cadance, but the left side bore the image like that of the body of the Changeling Queen, Chrysalis; this gave her the "double-mug" she was so known for. Twilight, on the other hoof, looked a bit more similar to her normal self, but she was clothed in a suit coat of emerald green and a bowler hat sharing the same hue. A golden scepter, the top end bearing the shape of a question mark, was strapped to her side. The Complex Conundrum was currently pushing a huge machine (the "Doom Ray", Batmare supposed). "Hurry up with the Doom Ray, you dolt," Double-Mug scolded. "Don't tell me what to do, you degenerated cheese cube!" Twilight spat. Cadance fumed inwardly, but quickly composed herself with a deep breath. Moments later, the dastardly machine was into its intended position. "Now," Double-Mug mused. "When Batmare comes, we shall--" "You shall what?" A voice boomed from the sky as Batmare herself swooped down. Alice followed cautiously, seeing the giant ray. Double-Mug laughed at pointed her hoof at Twilight, who was patiently waiting by the main button of the ray. "Now, Conundrum!" Twilight fired the Doom Ray with a devious smile and laugh. But Batmare dodged the emerald beam of energy heading her way, throwing herself into the evil device and smashing it to pieces. "No!" Double-Mug cried in horror, watching her precious machine destroyed before her very eyes. Batmare pushed herself up from the rubble of the Doom Ray, but was suddenly hit in the back of the head; she fell back onto the ground, blacking out instantly. *** Batmare awakened in her bed in the lush room she so often slept in. Turning her head to the side, Batmare spied on her nightstand a note. You were knocked out while fighting Double-Mug and the Complex Conundrum. They have been taken care of. I'm out running some errands. ~Your Faithful Butler, Alice Batmare arose, still in full costume, and descended the staircase into a reading room with a bust of an alicorn on the coffee table. After carefully tipping back the head and pushing a little red button hidden under it, the shelf of books across the room slid over to reveal an opening with a brass pole connecting the top level of the house to the secret one below. Batmare jumped into the doorway, and the shelf moved back to its place, covering up the portal. In the Mare-cave, Batmare's hidden hideout under her mansion, the computer was on, and a newscast was airing. "Both of Gothamare's biggest banks have just been robbed!" the stallion reporter on the screen shouted in despair at the camera filming him. "At both locations, notes have been left, reading, and I quote, 'Sincerely, Jokes-on-You'. On another note, gas is being spread through the city, turning ponies--" Suddenly, a stallion running by grabbed the camera suddenly, the scariest smile Batmare had ever seen stretched awfully across his face, and red stained deep on his lips. After a bone-chilling laugh and gas spraying in the background, the pony left the scene, and the reporter was now as crazed-looking as the stallion before. Cackling maniacally in-between, he cried out, "Where... are... you... Batmare?!" The screen cut to static. "Miss Batmare?" Alice walked up to the frowning pony. "I see you're conscious again." It was then that Batmare noticed a strange mark on her butler's face, but ignored it for now. "Y-yes, I am. Thank you." The butler looked to the computer screen, which now displayed a note reading, "Sincerely, Jokes-on-You", and said. "Oh my. A new villain plaguing the fair city of Gothamare?" "I'm afraid so, Alice." Batmare answered. "And I've got to stop them." The hero began to head out. "But, miss," the butler stopped her. "Shouldn't you be watching here?" "No, Alice," Batmare denied. "If I'm going to find this 'Jokes-on-You', I need to consult the other villains of Gothamare. They may have some information." "But, that sounds terribly dangerous--" Batmare glared at her butler. "So am I." Not another word was said as the dark mare exited the cave for possibly her most treacherous mission yet. Blast, Alice thought. I almost had her. Oh well. There will be other opportunities. *** At a table in a dim restaurant, a small orange figure with a proper style of attire sat at a booth, alone and with a single milkshake. She thought she was alone in that spot, but after taking a sip of her treat, she looked up and gave a startled shout. "Ah!" The hero she'd feared most through all of her ten years of life was straight across from her. "The Flightless Bird," Batmare stated. "Acquaintance with many criminals of Gothamare, and surprisingly rich for her young age." "I think I could've described myself better than that, thank you." Flightless retorted snobbishly, stretching her underdeveloped wings. Batmare ignored the filly. "I've heard there's a new villain in town. One of your new friends?" The Flightless Bird laughed, her short violet mane flapping back and forth as she threw her head back. "Ha! You think that I would acquaint myself with such a ruffian? No, Miss Mare, I only befriend proper criminals, not psychotic fiends who don't even have a real purpose in crime life." Batmare scowled, annoyed. "Fine." I guess I'll try one of the more... scruffy villains. "Harrumph." Flightless looked back to her milkshake, and found that is wasn't before her. It had been replaced by a handful of dollar bills and a note saying, 'Sorry. I got thirsty.' Half of the city heard the cry, "BLAST YOU, BATMARE!" *** It was dark in the lair. Just how its inhabitant liked it. "Lemme down, ya varmint!" The Commissioner hung from the ceiling of the hideout, bound with a rope. The officer was silenced with a cruel screech and an apple seed spit in her face. The captive said softly, "Ponies like you disgust me." She wished that Batty here would have picked another, less crisis-filled, day to kidnap her. But a few seconds later, she fell from the high place and crashed on the floor. She suddenly found herself freed from the rough rope formerly holding her entire body in place, which was now in cut pieces on the ground, and a voice whispered in her ear. "Get out of here as fast as you can." The Commissioner was quick to obey, finding the door slowly but surely in the dark. Thank you, Batmare... she thought to herself gratefully. Batmare saw the yellow creature hanging from the rafters of the lair, and called, "Hey!" the creature fell, but caught herself before she hit the ground. A screech sent saliva hurling into the hero's face, but it didn't affect her. "You heard of 'Jokes-on-You'?" The villainess smiled mischievously and answered in a dry, scratchy voice, "Maybe." "What do you know?" "She likes to laugh. Seems so opposite of her former self. But, personally, I like this new side much better than her drab, boring one." Batmare frowned and growled. "What do you mean, Flutterbat?" Flutterbat screeched, "That is all I'm telling. And if anypony asks, Flutterbat didn't screech a word." Then the batpony disappeared into the darkness. Batmare left. This was all she was going to get. And it was all she needed. As Batmare left, Flutterbat shed a single tear. Oh, Batsy, you have no idea how much I envy you. If only you knew the things I've been through to become more like you... From the blackness, soft sobbing could be heard. *** "Welcome back, Miss," Alice greeted as Batmare returned. "Any luck on finding Jokes-on-You?" "Yes, in fact, I did find out who this new villain is." "Who is it, then?" Batmare took a deep breath. 'Well, judging by the information I was given..." "Yes?" "Commissioner, you are free to come out." The butler suddenly found herself surrounded by numerous police officers and guns directing right at her. "B... But..." "Oh, Alice," the hero smiled. "Next time you become evil, try not to keep your same handwriting, and remember to wipe off your makeup after a crime spree." Alice scowled. "It's not my fault! You were the one that let herself become unconscious and left her friend vulnerable to Double-Mug's Doom Ray!" But Alice then started to laugh maniacally, and Batmare found that the red on her butler's lip was not makeup. Alice's face then grew pale green, and her mane turned from green, blue, and pink to pinstripe black and white. "Actually, Bats, thank you! Without your carelessness, I would have never met my more... glamorous side!" "Alright," the Commissioner rolled her eyes. "Let's get Jokes-on-You to the asylum." And just like that, they were gone. It was then that Batmare started to fade away, and Luna's mind returned. The hero tore off her cowl. Batmare hadn't just arrested a major super-criminal. She'd arrested her older sister. *** Luna sat in the darkness of the cave. Tia was gone, off to the Gothamare loony-bin. Cadance and Twilight were just as crazy, trying to turn the whole city into evil criminals. They'd probably already zapped the whole town. Luna was alone, stuck in a universe that wasn't even hers. The alicorn's thoughts were interrupted by an alarm. Some pony was knocking on the mansion door. Luna flew up the shaft that led down to the Mare-Cave still in her Batmare costume. She quietly slid the bookshelf off to the side, coming out and closing the portal behind her. Luna's heart almost stopped when she answered the door. Double-Mug and her Sidekick were standing there. "Ah!" Luna was about to slam the door shut, but Double-Mug's right hoof, Cadance's hoof, stopped it. "No! Batmare, you have to listen to us! We're not who we used to be!" It was then that Luna noticed that Double-Mug's voice had changed. Earlier, the villainess' voice had sounded evil and double-toned. Now it simply sounded like Cadance. Twilight stepped forward. Her green suit coat she still bore, but her face was no longer sarcastic and arrogant. "The explosion of the ray released a massive amount of energy throughout the whole city. Every 'good' pony turned 'bad', but every villain turned 'good'. Including us." Luna allowed the two inside and said, "I need you to know, you're not really Double-Mug and her Assistant!" the Night princess assumed the worst reply, but Cadance just nodded. "Yes, we know. Twilight realized it after our mindsets were altered." "Also," Twilight mused. "I have an idea of how we can escape this alternate universe! But we need to find Celestia to do it!" Luna and Cadance nodded firmly, and the three headed out to the main part of town. There, multiple ponies who looked like normal civilized citizens were stealing from stores and fighting one another. Other ponies who looked like criminals were protecting the shops from robbery. But this would have to be solved later. In the Gothamare Asylum, down a long hallway with only a few cells, loud and maniacal laughter could be heard. The noise could even be heard outside, where the three princesses were. "She's up there," Luna explained. It would be difficult to enter the asylum, because of its maximum security, but the three ponies had a plan. Batmare pounded on the steel door of the facility, and a guard opened it. "Whadda you want?" The hero answered, "I have captured Double-Mug and her Assistant. If you would just let me in--" "Sorry. We don't serve heroes here." What? Had the guard been hit by the blast of the Doom Ray as well? Batmare didn't have time to negotiate. She started to walk toward the guard. He started to move backward, looking afraid. "H-hey now, no need to get--" *** Batmare and company walked cautiously through the asylum, careful of any escaped criminals. Surprisingly, no trouble was found. The trio finally came to the hallway where the laughing was coming from. The door of the cell was kicked down. Inside sat two ponies. One was on the floor, rolling around and cackling like a maniac. The other was Celestia. "Sister!" Luna ran to embrace Tia, and they quickly exited the room before the other pony could get up. "It's lucky you came when you did," Celestia sighed with relief. "At first that pony was calm as can be, but some beam came in through the barred windows and he suddenly started laughing and laughing..." Luna hugged her sister again. "So that explains why we ran into no trouble on the way up here. The Two-Faced ray must have come in, turning the guards mean-spirited and the criminals sane." Twilight smiled. "Alright. Now, to get back home. Do you remember when we performed the royal creed?" The other three heads around Twilight nodded. "Good. I believe if we perform it again, we will return to Canterlot!" "Then let us not tarry." Luna stated, illuminating her horn. The other three followed, and the whole room filled with a bright white light.