No Farewell
“Well, here you are Rarity! Just knock on that door once and for all dear,” Rarity singsonged to herself , trying to cheer herself up so she could finally enter the library. She was perfect, and sparkling, as she used to. No, with an extra special touch actually, as she was going to meet her draconic boy after all…Although what she still couldn’t understand, was why she had spent the last five minutes standing outside the Library, her heart beating wildly, unable to move a single muscle. She was stuck there, her nerves making her shiver. You’re acting like a silly lovesick school girl, you know, it’s not like this is your first time dating someone! And it’s not even the first time you’ve dated him either!
Sure, that was true. But the memories of that last comment he’d made earlier this morning came back to haunt her. She almost turned back on the spot, intent on returning to her boutique, without even trying anything at all.
B-But… Am I really worth enough for him?
She wasn’t certain, perhaps she was just being greedy as she wanted him for her, and wasn’t giving him the chance to hang out with other girls. Maybe she was preventing him the chance to find the real love of his life, a girl that would love him as he deserved, not make him suffer as she did some time ago. She felt an intense pain in her heart with the simple thought of him loving anybody else, and she pressed one hand against her chest, trying to somewhat sooth the overwhelming painful feeling.
“Rarity? Are you okay?” She heard a voice calling her. A feminine one. “Rarity!” The voice cried as she felt someone shaking her shoulder vigorously, bringing her back to reality. She slowly regained her focus, realising that the voice belonged to none other than Twilight.
“Oh…Twilight?” she asked out loud, still a bit groggy. Of course it was Twilight.
“Yes, who else? I am the Librarian after all,” Twilight droned. “I thought I heard something so I came out to see what it was. I thought it might have been Fluttershy but imagine my surprise when I found you standing there, mumbling to yourself…” The lavender unicorn took a long breath after finishing her tirade.
Rarity blinked a few times, Twilight’s sudden appearance had dazzled her a bit. “H-Hello, Darling…I’m sorry but I got lost in my thoughts…” The fashionista was finally able to mutter something.
“Yeah, I could tell,” her friend said, leanding her into the tree house library. “Now, come on in and tell me, what brings you here?” Twilight slammed the door shut after both friends had entered the library.
Rarity took a deep breath as she mustered up her words. “Wu-Well, I… came to…” Suddenly, the idea of seeing Spike right now and then became extremely distressing. Rarity couldn’t tell exactly why, but she was certain she didn’t feel prepared. Twilight blinked few times, probably trying to discern the reason behind the fashionista’s weird behavior. Rarity’s eyes darted frantically all over the place, trying to find an excuse.
“I’m here for a book. Yes, that, of course!” Rarity giggled clumsily, pulling a random tome from the bookshelf. “So… I’m taking this one!”
Twilight stared first at the book Rarity was holding, and then to her with a sceptical glance as Rarity slipped the book in her purse, heading to the main door. But Twilight was faster and levitated the book off Rarity’s purse before she closed it and to look what the title of the book was.
“Draconic anatomy? Why in Equestria would you need this book?” Twilight asked, after reading the title. Rarity felt her mouth go completely dry, leaving her unable to utter a single word. “Does this have something to do with Spike?” The Librarian inquired, smirking a little.
Rarity felt her cheeks burn.“Ah-I...Twilight, why on earth do you have to be so rude!” She cried, taking the book off Twi’s grip and reading the title herself to corroborate that this was, indeed, the worst possible book she could’ve chosen. “Don’t you trust me, Darling? Did you need to be so... harsh?”
“Well, I have to take notice of the books that leave and enter this library, for starters, that and organize them, I am the Librarian after all”, Twilight stated, staring studingly at her friend. “Well, whatever, take it, and you don’t even need to tell me why you need it, it was actually quite inappropriate for me to ask”. Twilight went back to her desk, and went back to her own book.
"Whahaha, of course not, Twilight, I... wasn't going to take this book, in fact it looks like I picked the wrong one..." She quickly put the book back in its place, fully intending to just pull a random one. Unfortunately for her, they were all about dragons. The one she was reaching for was titled "Draconic Sexuality". She immediately let go of it, disgust clear in her now even redder face. "Ugh... ok, no."
Twilight stared dumbfounded. "No what, exactly?"
"I... didn't come here to get a book. I..." There was no hope, her mind was unable to come up with any plausible excuse. She held her breath for a couple of seconds before sighing, resigned to what was to come. Well then, Rarity, it's time to confront this. If you really want a relationship with Spike then you should not keep it a secret from your friends. Besides, there's nothing wrong with us being together now, right? After all, he’s became an adult and...
"Rarity, are you feeling alright?" Twilight put a hand to her forehead, snapping her out of her thoughts.
"Yes, yes, I'm fine, darling...” She had to lay it all out on the table. “Truth is I came over to see if Spike was here!" She blurted.
There were a few moments of silence before Twilight finally said, "Oh, was that so hard to say?"
"No, it's not that. I mean, I..."
"He's not here anyway,” Twilight shrugged.
"H-he's not here?" Suddenly, her frayed nerves started calming down. Yes, she definitely wasn't prepared to talk to him, lucky her he wasn't at home right now.
"No, he went out a while ago, said he was going to see Rainbow Dash."
As suddenly as it had appeared, all of her calm and collectedness disappeared.
"Rainbow Dash? Why would he go see Rainbow Dash?" Rarity asked, frowning.
"No idea. But I can tell him you came see him when he returns. Is there anything else I can do for you?" Twilight asked, probably trying to remember just what page she had been reading before her friend interrupted her.
Rarity didn’t answer. In fact she wasn’t even there anymore, having stormed out of the library, leaving the lavender unicorn talking alone.
2 years ago, Ponyville Train Station.
“Well Spike, we’ll really miss you. Please don’t forget to write!”
“I’m still not sure if you’ll miss me or my help… but of course I’ll write, Twilight” Spike responded, nervously looking at this watch.
Twilight hit him lightly on his nape, “Silly dragon” She frowned. He noticed she was restraining her tears, but still smiled goofily at his dumb quip.
“How much until you leave us forever?” Rainbow asked, looking nonchalantly away.
“He won’t leave us forever, he promised he’d be back!” Pinkie moped.
Rainbow crossed her arms, giving her pink-puffy-haired friend a cold stare. “Sure, he probably told you that so you wouldn’t make a scene.”
“He Pinkie-promised it! Nobody breaks a pinkie promise!”
“Yeah yeah, whatever...”
“Easy girls, and to answer your question, it’s only 15 minutes until the train leaves,” Spike intervened.
Applejack stepped in. “So it’s better if we start with the farewell and all. We ain’t got much time left.” She moaned, looking towards the city. “Where’s Rarity anyways? She’s kind of late. I can’t believe she’d be late for something so important!”
“Wait, that’s actually odd. She wouldn’t do something like that.” Twilight pointed out, concern in her voice. “Perhaps something happened to her?” She asked, looking at Spike.
Spike started sweating and shivering. It seemed his plan had worked and nobody had informed her of his departure, so she wasn’t actually coming. Remorse started building up in him. “Don’t worry girls, she…had stuff to do…so she’s not coming, you know” He stammered.
Applejack frowned. “But y’er her friend! Nothing can be more important, I mean y’er leaving for Celestia knows how long and she doesn’t even come to say goodbye? It ain’t like Rare to do something like that, and if she did it’d be an awful thing to do!”
“I...I don’t think she’d do that…as Twilight said. Perhaps something horrible happened to her and she couldn’t make it in time? Oh… someone should go to see if she’s okay,” Fluttershy said, his eyes watering in concern.
“She’s okay girls, Rarity just isn’t coming.” Spike decided to tell them the truth, he couldn’t let them think Rarity would do something like that. “I didn’t tell her I was leaving.”
There was a brief silence. It ended when AJ grabbing him by his shirt’s collar and shouted at him, “You didn’t tell her? But why in the hay would you do something like that?! Spike, are ya crazy?”
“I-I’m sorry I…” Spike said, whose feet were now dangling above the ground.
“Can’t you see? Now she’ll be completely broken when she finds out you left without even having the chance to come to say goodbye! And you won’t be here to watch the scene, we will!” She shook him roughly, he looked like a rag doll in her furious grip.
“Calm down AJ, let the guy explain. I’m sure he has to have a good reason for his dumb decision…” Rainbow intervened, wanting to avoid having to witness a murder.
“Yes, and I really hope he does. Spike, what you did…has no name! Please tell us how could you do something so thoughtless! I thought Rarity was important to you…” Twilight scolded him. Of course there was no way someone would be on his side in a situation such as this one. Not even himself. What in Celestia's name was he thinking?
“Uh...yeah sorry. I-I thought…” That it was the better for both of us. Sure, that was the excuse. But he couldn’t say that or else he would need to tell them all of the truth. The best option was to sacrifice himself to protect her and the others from knowing. It was his fault after all; he was the coward. “I thought I’d rather not have to say goodbye, not to her. I just couldn’t leave… if I had to say goodbye to her. I’m sorry, I know I was wrong, please forgive me…”
“I really hope Rarity will forgive you.” AJ added with raging eyes, pressing her nose to his, after that she finally dropped him, making him totter backwards and almost falling to the ground on his butt.
“Ok guys, only 10 minutes left and it’s time for someone to actually do something. I’m going to see if I can get Rarity here in time before this dumbass leaves.” Rainbow said, giving him a quick hug, though to Spike it felt more like an attempted strangulation, what with the way she wrapped one arm around his neck. “I’m saying goodbye now in case I don’t make it in time” she said, breaking the hug. “And...I really hope you’ll keep that Pinkie-promise, huh? Goodbye Spike.” These were her last words before she sped away.
No matter what Rarity did, nothing happened to go right. All her designs lacked inspiration, she was working more like a machine than an artist. Sometimes she’d throw all the sketches of new designs she’d done during that day to the trash, and went crying to her bed. And then she’d start thinking and questioning if she did what actually was the best for both of them.
She’d cry herself to sleep, only to wake up a few hours later thinking about how pathetic she was. Then she’d get up from her bed, apply some makeup, recompose herself, and start working again; she had orders to fulfill after all, she had bills to pay, gifts to afford, etc. These days it wasn’t any different. The fashionista drew another twelve sketches, and her nose was already wincing at the sight.
“What a failure of a fashionista you are, Rarity…” She mumbled to herself. Her eyesight started to blur. “No, not the pathetic drama mistress again...stupid tears”. Tear after tear started soaking the sheet where she had drawn the last of her attempts at design. No matter how much effort she put into restraining her tears, the pain was simply too much to bear and it always ended up crushing her. “Spikey-wikey…” She was able to whisper, before she heard the doorbell ringing.
She quickly wiped the threatening tears away, thankful that whoever was in the door had saved her from another act of misery full of sobs and sniffs. She ran to the door, mustering the most brilliant of her smiles (number 5) before opening it.
“Welcome to—”
“Shut up, diamont butt! We gotta get going, and we gotta do it NOW!”
Rarity blinked few times, trying to understand just what in Equestria was going on. She didn’t even get a word out before she found herself being dragged outside by her rainbow-haired friend. And oh dear, she was strong. But not enough to take a lady to unknown whereabouts without a chance to properly prepare herself for the occasion.
“Hey, Rainbow Dash, what on earth are you doing here? And where do you think you’re taking me?” She cried out, freeing her hand with a slight electric shock from her horn.
“Ow! What the heck, Rarity, that hurts!” She said, rubbing her hand.
“Well if you only took a few moments of your time to explain to me why and where we are going then perhaps I wouldn’t have to zap you,” Rarity frowned, placing her hands on her waist. “So if you don’t mind, would you care to tell me what is going on?”
“Who cares, crazy zappy lady, let’s go!” Rainbow urged, flapping her wings impatiently. “We need to get to the train station, now!” She grabbed Rarity’s arm again and dragged her all the way to her flower garden before she was zapped again. “Would you stop doing that?!”
“Then tell me what’s going on!”
“Fine, Spike’s leaving Ponyville to live in Canterlot, now hurry up, we need to skedaddle!” Rainbow mumbled. “Now let’s go!”
Rarity eye’s widened when she heard Spike’s name. Spike was leaving Ponyville… and he didn’t tell her? Her knees became wobbly and she fell down. “Did I really… did I really hurt him that much?” Puh don’t be silly Rarity, of course you did! but… to the point of forcing him to run away from all of his friends? It brought a tear to her eye, of course she had caused him so much pain… but still, there was one thing that she needed to know. “W-why is he leaving?” She asked, knowing full well that she was the most likely reason behind it.
“Well, he wants to stop being lame and become a soldier I guess?” Rainbow shrugged. “But does that really matter right now? He’s leaving town for who knows how long, and for some reason you didn’t get the memo. Now I understand that you’re sad about this, we all are. But right now you can either sit here and mope around or you can suck it up and see your friend off to the train station. So what’s it going to be, Rare?”
“I…I…” Rarity trembled, wiping her sadness away and getting back on her feet. If this was the last time she’d get to see Spike, then by the goddess she was going to give him a decent farewell, and with any luck she’d be able to clean the air between the two of them. If she could do that, at the very least, then perhaps some of the weight on her soul would be lifted. “Let’s go, Rainbow.” She frowned with determination and It.Is.On expression in her face. “Now, take me to Spike—Whoa!”
She didn’t expect Rainbow to be so literal with her request. The pegasus girl grabbed her by her wrists and took off into the morning sky. It had been a while since she had last flown, and she remembered how terrifying it was, being helpless hundreds of feet in the air. And she remembered how much she hated it. Rainbow could have at least grabbed on to her better, instead of having her flailing around in the air by her wrist.
How unladylike she must have looked, wind lifting her dress and letting all Ponyville see her beautiful handmade underwear. At least she had worn one of her best… to the hell with that! If a small amount of discomfort was all it took for her to see her beloved Spike one more time in who knows how long, then she would endure this.
“All aboard for Canterlot!” The Conductor shouted as the train whistled. Spike knew his time was up and he needed to go. He took one last look around, not seeing the woman he still loved anywhere on the horizon. He supposed that Rainbow hadn’t made it to the Boutique in time. Part of him was a little grateful that the beautiful fashionista wasn’t around, it would be too painful to face her… especially since he hadn’t told her he was leaving. The conductor shouted again as more and more people started boarding the train.
“I guess it’s time to go…” Spike sighed, giving Twilight one last hug before grabbing his luggage and taking his first step onto the train. “I’m going to miss you all so much.”
Pinkie Pie burst out into tears. “WHY?! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO LEAVE SPIKE!?”
“Because Pinkie…” Spike muttered. “It’s… it’s just something I have to do. I promised to write and I’ll try to visit as soon as possible but I really need to go now. I’m sorry.” He disappeared through the train door. Spike pushed his way through the cramped hallway and into one of the vacant booths, where he looked through the window. Twilight, and Applejack were waving at him while Fluttershy tried to comfort the distressed Pinkie Pie. He really was going to miss them all…
The train started to creak, and there was a shift in the cabin. He was moving, and slowly he started to see his friends disappear from his sight along with the train station, growing smaller in the distance. He slouched into his seat, placing his suitcase next to him as he started to think.
Why didn’t Rarity show up? It didn’t seem like Dash to not make it on time to tell her, and she was the fastest girl in Ponyville. The only reason Rarity must’ve not shown up was because she simply didn’t care, and she truly had broken up with him. Or… perhaps she was too shocked at the news that she freaked out and didn’t make it in time? Sure, she said she didn’t love him in that way, but that didn’t mean she didn’t love him as a friend. And she was the type to make a scene even worse than Pinkie’s...
A single tear crept from his eyes as he closed the blinds in his compartment. He wanted to be alone right now. He felt like an ass for not telling her. Just then, he realized he had been selfish and a coward, because he was actually afraid of not being able to leave if she asked him to stay, or if he simply saw her again… could he just leave and not see her for such a long time?
However, if he had kept the window open for just a few more seconds, he would have seen two specks flying towards him at the distance.
Rainbow Dash was heftily flapping her exhausted wings as she struggled to keep Rarity in the air. “We’re…. too… late…” she panted, dropping Rarity on the ground before gliding down herself. The worn out Rainbow collapsed to the ground in a dizzy state and laid motionless on the ground, falling unconscious. “I’m tapping out,” were the last words she mumbled before her head dropped back into the dirt.
Rarity stumbled as she tried to break her fall, thankful that Rainbow was only hovering a few feet above the ground before she let go of her. She broke out into a full out sprint towards the train station as she saw Spike’s train kicking into gear. “No… no, no, no! I can’t be late! SPIKE!” She shouted, praying that he could hear her over the screeching of metal. “SPIKEY! WAIT!” She continued to run after the train, ignoring her crying friends as she chased the train as far as she could. But it was no use… it was picking up speed every second and she was running out of breath. Eventually the train disappeared into the distance.
She was too late.
The poor girl fell to her knees, no longer caring that it would smudge her skin. She was panting, tired, sweaty, and worse of all, heartbroken. “I... I wasn’t even able to tell you goodbye...” she whimpered, crying over the boy whose heart she had toyed with and broken, and would never see again.
Or at least… not for the next two years, and not that same skinny cute boy she loved with all her heart.