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// Local Donkey Steals Hearth's Warming Eve 
// Story: The Ponion 
// by CartsBeforeHorses 
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December 24th, 2013
Local Donkey Steals Hearth's Warming Eve
Guest article by Doctor Zecora

PONYVILLE--A local donkey reportedly has stolen Hearth’s Warming Eve from the town. He cited the fact that he hated “all the noise” and wished that the ponies would just “quit banging around.”

All the ponies down in Ponyville liked Hearth’s Warming Eve a lot, but Cranky Doodle Donkey, who lived just north of Ponyville, indicated in a recent interview with the Ponion that he, in fact, did not.

Cranky Doodle undertook a massive heist of all of the Hearths’ Warming Eve apparel from every house in the town of Ponyville, sneaking through chimneys and picking the locks.  He snuck off to the town on Hearth’s Warming Eve, during the middle of the night, and proceeded to steal every last wreath, candy cane, present, package, bag, and box.

So he wouldn’t appear suspicious, he disguised himself in an outfit as a clever ruse: The donkey dressed up as good old Santa Hooves.

“It was a tight fit, squeezing down all those chimneys of every last house,” said Cranky Doodle. “But with a bit of finnesse, I did it. And I left crumbs too small, even for a mouse.” 

He took all the dresses that Rarity made. He took all the cupcakes that Pinkie Pie baked. He took Applejack’s signature Hearth’s Warming pie. He took all the snow from out of the sky. He took Scootaloo’s new scooter, that Rainbow Dash got her. He took a new rubber ball from Fluttershy’s otter. He took all the lights from Twilight’s library tree. He took all the capes from the CMCs. He took the wooden blocks from Pumpkin and Pound. He took every gift and present around.

He hauled all these gifts back up to his lair. A smile on his face, he waited to hear the town’s despair. But then the next morning, he woke up with his ears ringing. Despite his thievery, Pinkie Pie was leading the town in a round of singing!

They sung all the same carols they normally did, even though all of their gifts he had hid. He puzzled and puzzled at this contradiction. And then he came down with a merry affliction.

“Hearth’s Warming is in their hearts. I can’t take it away!” 

Witnesses on the scene confirmed that his heart grew three sizes that day.

So he brought back the presents to the Ponyville town. He gave all the gifts back, and passed them around. Ponyville embraced him with open hooves, and he sat with them for dinner, eating their food.

This has been a special Ponion news story. Have a happy new year, and a merry Hearth’s Warming. Ω