//------------------------------// // The Morning Routine // Story: Those Stripes // by JeremyStorm //------------------------------// 5 o’clock’s alarm made itself known far too early in the morning. The grating wail made me want to toss the thing out the window, conveniently still open, if I remembered correctly. Instead, I opted to slam it with my fist, doing my best to not disturb the pile of fur all over me. I distinctly remembered falling asleep with two zebras next to me, not on top of me. I found myself on my back, Amiti claiming my stomach as some sort of pillow. Above him, a little filly had nestled herself in the crook of my arm, on her back with her head on my shoulder. All four legs were in the air, occasionally giving a little kick. I couldn’t resist. I reached over with my free right hand and gently wiggled a finger under a forehoof. I was rewarded with a sharp slap of her hoof against my hand as she kicked. I stifled a gasp and stretched my fingers to work feeling back into them. That little filly needed to trim her hooves something fierce. Regretting my choice of fun for the morning already, I decided to try to find a way to get up. I reached down to Amiti’s head, finding his messy mane, and scratching lightly behind his ears. It was a pastime he particularly enjoyed (as I found most ponies did) and his ears quickly perked as he woke up. One eye creaked open, blearing up at me in a lazy annoyance. I just smirked. After all, he’s the one that has to get up to go to work, not me. Grumbling to himself, he stood, pausing to stretch out his back. If it wasn’t the cuddling that reminded me of a cat, it was the way he stretched that did it. He actually does the whole legs forward, arching the back thing. It’s cute. Stepping over me, he carefully dropped himself to the floor, careful to not wake May. That was just as well, since he was also supporting a massive erection. Stallions, much like human men, suffer (or benefit, I guess, depending on who you ask) from morning wood. It was really awkward the first time May slept with us like this, because him naked with an erection around his daughter set off some understandable warning bells in my head. When I later talked to him about it, he gave me the most bemused look, like I had said the moon was made of cheese or something. He assured me that it was natural, and nothing to worry about. After I thought on it for a long while, I realized he probably had a point. The way he describes it, when you’re naked pretty much all the time, getting aroused in public is bound to happen occasionally. I’ve even seen it myself a couple of times around town in the two years I’ve lived here. It was ‘quite the social faux pas’, as a certain white unicorn I know would say, but, unlike back on Earth, it wasn’t like it was a crime or anything (now actually doing anything sexual, on the other hand, was a completely different matter). And it wasn’t like he was doing anything bad to her or anything, so I put the issue out of mind. It was still pretty weird to me, though, so I’m glad when I don’t have to deal with it. Landing softly on the floor, he made his way to the door and off to the bathroom. Along the way, I couldn’t help but watch his flanks, and as though reading my mind, he began to sway them side to side, causing his tail to swing, offering tantalizing glimpses of what was beneath, but never quite revealing anything. Just before stepping out the door, he paused, whipping his tail up and shaking his ass. It took everything I had not to laugh out loud and wake up May, but I couldn’t help a few light chuckles getting out. I could practically feel his smug grin from across the room. Stupid sexy zebra. When he was gone, I considered briefly going back to bed. There was another hour before May needed to get up for school, and I didn’t have work until 7:00 anyway. With the room at a nice comfortable temperature, soft sheets below me and a warm fuzzy pillow next to me, it was pretty hard to convince myself to get up. Not to say I didn’t indulge a little. I did allow myself at least the twenty minutes that Amiti was in the shower to laze about. After he returned, mane, tail and coat freshly brushed, though still somewhat damp, I finally got about getting up. Extracting myself from May was something I was almost getting good at. She still grumbled and squirmed as I lowered her head from my shoulder to the bed, but she didn’t wake. As I stretched to get a particularly bad kink out of my neck, I felt Amiti brush up against my leg. He already had his white collar on, complete with a small green bowtie and his nametag. “Well, I’m off to work. Make sure May gets to school on time, okay luv? Can’t have her late today,” he said, already moving toward the door. May was starting her second year of primary school, and today was the first day of term. She’s been dreading today for a while now, which is funny since she absolutely loved school last year. She’s thankfully not like I was when I was her age; she loves learning new things. I think her reluctance just the typical thing of kids hating the summer vacation ending. “Yeah, I got it. Up by 6, out the door by a quarter ‘til, right?” I asked. “That should do it. Thanks Matt, it will be so much easier than last year. Trying to get her up while I got ready for work was always a mess.” “So that’s why you married me. So I could babysit May while you’re at work, huh?” I asked in mock hurt. “Well that is part of the reason. The other part we can’t talk about while there are impressionable fillies present,” he said, giving me his best grin. I just shook my head. “Yeah yeah, have a good day at work, hun.” “You too, luv. Don’t work too hard at the spa,” he called as he walked out the door. I hadn’t even gotten the chance to consider what to do next when he stepped back inside. “I almost forgot, please check her saddlebags before you go to make sure she didn’t forget anything,” he said. “Didn’t you check them three times last night?” I asked. “Yes,” he said, blushing slightly, “But can you please check them anyway, just in case?” I sighed. He could be really paranoid about her sometimes, but I guess that’s part of being a dad, isn’t it? “Sure thing,” I said, nodding. He smiled, thanked me, and was gone again. I heard the front door close this time, though. With him gone and May still snoring in the bed, it was finally my turn for the bathroom. We had to make some compromises when it came to furnishing it. We had to import a bathtub from the Minotaur Republic to accommodate my height, but most other stuff was of pony design. Most unfortunately for me was the toilet. It wasn’t exactly much different in shape that what I was used to, but it was quite a bit… shorter. Ah well, it gets the job done. After relieving my bladder and washing my hands, I checked my face in the mirror. Black stubble was starting to show up, but I didn’t feel like bothering to shave yet; I kinda liked a bit of a 5 o’clock shadow. Instead I brushed my teeth and called it good for now. Moving back to our room, I peeked an eye at May as I rifled through our dresser. Amiti had next to no clothing, so pretty much everything in it was mine. Satisfied that the filly was still asleep, I took off the sweatpants I had put on last night and replaced it with a worn pair of boxers and a pair of old gym shorts. I also dug out a pair of socks and an a-shirt. It wasn’t the type of thing I would have ever worn before I found myself in Equestria. I laughed at the thought of me wearing one two years ago. It wasn’t that I was out of shape; I just certainly didn’t have much of a body to show off. Too scrawny. Nearly two years of the healthiest diet I’ve ever had and varying amounts of physical labor every day and I have to admit I thought I looked pretty good in one now. I might have worn one every time I left the house if I didn’t worry I’d look obnoxious. Not that anypony would really notice, I guess. The whole no clothes thing and all. Gently closing the bedroom door so as not to wake my little filly, I made my way up the narrow little hall to our living room. It was a pretty simply decorated room as neither Amiti nor I were much for having a lot of things. We had a very comfortable couch, another Minotauren import, as well as a few more pony-sized chairs and pillows for guests all centered around a low coffee table. Along the wall we had a few bookshelves filled with all kinds of fiction and some nonfiction as well. Amiti was obsessed with his mystery novels, and I was growing to really like griffon fantasy. They had a flair for writing about epic quests and grand wars, all of which greatly reminded me of human fantasy books. Even May had a couple of rows for herself. The walls themselves bore the only real decorations. Several framed portraits were clustered together opposite the window, most of which were of May. Her school picture, a few of her and her friends, even one of her with her saddlebags the morning of her first day of school just last year. My favorite picture, though, was one we took a week before the wedding. The whole family was together with Amiti and I sitting side to side with May between us, and Amiti’s older sister Zecora on his other side. He and Zecora grew up in Zebrica together before moving to Equestria. He’s never liked talking about his time in Zebrica much, but he did explain that she fled one night without telling him where she was going or why she was leaving. He left shortly after May was born with the hope of tracking her down. It took him a few years, but he eventually followed her here to Ponyville where they were very happily reunited. I don’t know why they left, and even though I’m dying to find out, I’m afraid to ask. It isn’t like Amiti to keep secrets, so this was obviously something very important to him. He’ll tell me when he’s ready, I hope. Turning away from the pictures, I grabbed my running shoes from their spot beside the door. After lacing them up, I grabbed my keys and was out the door and off down the road at a brisk jog. This was another thing I would have laughed at myself doing two years ago. Running was work, something I was no fan of and avoided every chance I got. Now, I actually found it kind of fun. The sun was just beginning to peak over the horizon, and already the morning was warm and humid. Thankfully it was already August and the summer heat would pass soon. My routine consisted of the three blocks to the center of town where I’d circle around the park and then all the way back. It was only about a mile by my estimation, and by now I was up to making the whole trip five times, but I usually only had time in the mornings for three or four. Getting such an early start meant that the roads throughout town were practically empty. Only the earliest risers were out and about, like Carrot Top at her carrot stall, or every other day one of the three Apple siblings with their apple cart. Today, I didn’t see anypony as I made my first trip through town. The second trip I started to smell heaven in the form of warm, fresh bread emanating from Sugarcube Corner. When I first found myself in Ponyville, I stopped there several times a week as the owners, and their two assistants were each phenomenal bakers and everything there was fantastic. But the dent it put in my wallet- er… bit pouch, and all the pounds I put on from the extra sugar quickly put a stop to that. I still make an effort to stop by at least every other weekend or so, though, because I love chatting with them when they aren’t too busy, and May happens to be good friends with their twins. I had just passed the town square on my third trip when I heard someone call my name. Turning, I saw a familiar Pegasus swoop down towards me. Derpy Hooves is a light grey mare, with a golden mane and tail, with matching eyes that occasionally liked to slide off-kilter. Because of that, she has a bit of a reputation around town for being somewhat airheaded, which she can be, but nopony who knows her can deny she’s one of the nicest ponies (or any creature, for that matter) that you’ll ever meet. She’s one of the town mailmares, and so I tend to run into her like this pretty much everyday. She takes her job really serious, too, so she never has a whole lot of time to stop and chat, but she makes the effort to at least flutter down and say hi. It’s nice. I never shy away from being chatted up by a cute mare. “Hi! Good morning, Matthew!” she called out as she awkwardly landed, nearly stumbling. Her mailpony cap slid forward over her face, so I reached out and replaced it between her ears. She giggled as I did. “Morning, Derpy. How’s the life of a mailmare treating you?” “Oh, very well. Just missing Sparkler, now that she’s moved out; house feels a little emptier with just Dinky and I.” She has two daughters: Sparkler and Dinky. The former recently finished her apprenticeship with Silver Smith, a local jeweler. She’d wanted to start her own business for some time, and she just moved out to give it a go. I’d been meaning to stop by but I hadn’t had the chance yet. Amiti might like a new pair of earrings. “Yeah, how’s her business doing? Off to a good start, I hope?” She practically beamed as I asked. “Oh yes! She has several clients that followed her from her apprenticeship with Mr. Silver. It’s still small, but she’s making enough to get by. I couldn’t be happier for her,” she said, and it showed. She practically glowed. Nowadays, I think I’m starting to understand that look. “Anyway,” she said, shaking her head, “I have to get back to my route. Nice talking to you!” We both waved each other off and I turned to get back to my jog when I heard her call out to me again. “Oh, I almost forgot! I was supposed to mention to you that Dinky was wanting to start foalsitting to earn some bits. So, if you ever need a foalsitter for May, she’d be happy to!” “Oh good, we’ve been hoping for somepony a little closer to home. Taking her out to Zecora’s everytime gets a little… inconvenient.” It’s not that I didn’t like Zecora, quite the opposite, it’s more of having to take a little filly out through the Everfree Forest that neither Amiti nor I care for. It’s at least a quarter hour walk each way, not to mention that that forest is downright creepy. After thanking her and assuring her that we’d keep Dinky in mind, we said our goodbyes again and were soon both off on our daily routines. The rest of my jog went smoothly, only stopping one last time in the market to quickly say good morning to Applebloom. She’s the youngest Apple sibling, and while I didn’t know her well, she’s always willing to give a nice greeting and a warm smile. By the time I got back to the house, I was feeling good. I could have done the last two laps, but my watch told me I didn’t have time before May needed to be up. I should start getting up earlier. After letting myself in, I kicked my shoes back into their place and peeled my shirt off. I made my way back to the bedroom and inched opened the door. Sure enough, May was still out like a light, but at some point she had turned herself sideways on the bed, probably in an effort to curl up against something. I took my shirt off and used it to wipe off some of the sweat from my face. Tossing the thing into a hamper in the corner, I pulled out a nicer shirt and pair of pants from the dresser. A quick shower later and the soreness was gone from my legs, replaced by a pleasant tiredness. A glance at the clock said it was five after. I must’ve been in the shower longer than I intended. As I passed the door to May’s room, I stepped inside to turn off the alarm that was now going off, managing not to trip over any of the toys and books scattered on the floor. She wasn’t usually a messy filly, but she did occasionally forget to put up her toys before she went to bed. She’s only seven; I can’t really find it in myself to hold it against her. Back in my room, I briefly considered trying to get away with tickling her awake again. A small throb through my finger reminded me that was a bad idea. Instead, I opted for my usual standby, a light scratching behind the ears. Unlike her father, though, she didn’t immediately wake, instead curling into my hand. “Time to get up for school, pumpkin,” I said, scritching more forcefully. She groaned and finally cracked open her eyes, looking up at me with a face that said I interrupted a particularly good dream. As a last measure of defiance, she closed her eyes and rolled onto her stomach, covering her head with her hooves with an annoyed grunt. “Aww, that’s no way to behave on the first day of school. Just think, you’ll get to see all your friends from last year again, and get to learn all kinds of new things! Doesn’t that sound like fun?” I asked, trying to keep the laughter in my voice to a minimum. Last thing she needed now was to feel like I was teasing her, even if I sort of was. She grumbled something that didn’t quite make it past her hooves and to my ears. “Sorry, sweetie, you’re gonna have to speak up.” “Dunwannago,” she said. “Well, if that’s the way it’s going to be, I know what I have to do.” Her ears perked up as she realized what was coming, but I didn’t give her the time to prepare. I drove my hands into her sides, tickling furiously under her forelegs. She squealed and locked her legs to her chest in an attempt to block me, but I changed strategies. I wormed my hands under her belly, digging my fingers into her coat. Her giggling increased in volume and she tried to spring away from my reach, but succeeded in only falling to her side, giving me even greater access. I continued until she was panting for breath. “Heehee, ha- MATT, STOP, I GOTTA PEE!” she yelled amidst breathless laughs, finally squirming out of my grasp and galloping off to the bathroom. I laughed; at least I managed to get her out of bed. While she was in the bathroom, I made my way up the hall to the kitchen. Couldn’t send a growing filly to school without breakfast, right? Now, I’m no great shakes at cooking, but since coming here, the land of no instant food, you either learn or you starve. At the very least, I can cook some passable pancakes and fry some eggs. As I got the batter together and the first pancake going, I decided to throw some hash browns in the plans as well. Guess I was hungry after my jog. By the time the first couple of pancakes were done, I heard hooves clicking against the floor behind me. I put two on a plate along with some delicious looking, if I do say so myself, hash browns and eggs. As I placed the plate before her at our little table, I took stock of her. Her coat looked properly washed and brushed, though her mane still looked a little unkempt, but she liked it that way. I noticed her hooves still needed filing, but there wasn’t really time for the in the morning anyway. “Did you brush your teeth?” I asked her. “Yep,” she said, much more like her usual energetic self than earlier. “Good girl,” I said as I turned back to the counter to fix myself a plate too. I took my place across from her, pleased to see she had already dug in. Amiti is a stickler for appearances, and that extended to table manners. The way May was furiously putting the food away would have certainly gotten a reprimand from him, but I figure kids will be kids. She has plenty of time to grow up and learn that stuff later, right? As long as she didn’t get her face or the table dirty, I didn’t care much, so I let it slide. I began to eat as well, and somewhere along the way it somehow turned into a silent competition as to who could clean their plate first. I still don’t know where it came from. She already had a head start on me, but I had the advantage of a much bigger mouth. Keep all “your mom” and “that’s what she said” jokes to yourself, please. Eventually, I came away the victor, as if there was ever any doubt. As I took up our plates and dumped them in the sink for later I heard May hop out of her chair. A quick check of the clock said it was just about time for both of us to leave. I went into the living room to put on my nicer shoes for work. Just as I finished lacing them up, she stepped into the room, saddlebags in tow. She made for the door, but I held up a hand. “Hold up, your dad wanted me to check your saddlebags,” I said. “Again? He checked them three times last night,” she whined, but she held still for me anyway. A quick check showed her textbooks, pencils and scrolls were all there just like they had been last night. “Alright, yep, looks like you’re good,” I said. And without further ado, I opened the door and we both filed out, stopping long enough for me to lock the door behind us. Outside, I dropped to one knee and instantly she reared up and threw both hooves about my neck. I returned the hug and tousled her mane as she pulled back. “Alright, you have fun in class today, alright kiddo? Tell Ms. Cheerilee ‘hello’ for me, okay?” I said. “I will,” she said, sighing. “Aw, cheer up. You’re going to have fun, I know it. Now, you’d better get going, don’t want to be late. Be good, okay? I love you.” “I will, Matt. Love you, too,” she said, already turning down the road towards the schoolhouse. I stopped briefly to watch her go before I turned to walk the other way. Now later in the morning, Ponyville was much more awake. Town square was crawling with ponies stopping at Sugarcube Corner for breakfast or coffee, and the marketplace with packed with merchants hocking their wares. Two years ago, when I first found myself in Ponyville, I could cut a path through any crowd just by walking by. Now, ponies barely notice me anymore than anyone else. Eventually I made it to the large purple building just off the center of town. The Ponyville Day Spa, owned by the twins Aloe and Lotus. Maybe not the most extravagant name ever, but it sort of suits Ponyville like that. Great place, and one that also lacks pretense. It’s a really nice, well-equipped place with three separate baths, several saunas, and even a few massage rooms. How they afford to have such a big place in a tiny town like this is beyond me, but they make it work somehow. I’m not about to start complaining, though, as they were the only ponies nice enough to offer me a job. It started with mostly backroom stuff. Cleaning and stocking the massage rooms, moving boxes of oils and salts from the store room, placing orders and taking inventory, that sort of stuff. Lately they’ve had me manning the counter to help clients. Before, one of the two owners always did it, which meant there was only ever one available to actually perform their services. This way, both were free and they could get more business done at once. I wouldn’t mind becoming a masseur, though; the pay raise would be nice. I’d talked about it with them before, but they were afraid that ponies wouldn’t be willing to purchase my services. Just because ponies around town weren’t afraid of walking by me anymore doesn’t mean they would be okay with me running my hands all over them. Oh well, I know one zebra that doesn’t mind. The rest just don’t know what their missing. Either way, I unlocked the door and let myself inside. Only thirty minutes until opening and I had plenty to do. Off I go to another wonderful day of work. Joy.