//------------------------------//
// Feeling Pinkie Keen 
// Story: Responses To A Disgruntled Friendship Student 
// by keaton-furman-prower 
//------------------------------//

Dear Twilight Sparkle:

Please allow me to clarify what you've just said. Are you actually suggesting that drugs enabled Pinkie Pie to predict the future? I'm sorry, but I think she may have infected you with her highs. On the other hoof, if there is any truth behind this analysis, then I may have to prove it for myself. Excuse me, but I need to take a hit.

Hmm, I think we ought to talk a bit about Fluttershy and the frog problem. I have heard from the griffon kingdom that frog legs are quite delicious, and I believe that we could really help manage the problem if we took a cue from them. It has not been easy getting ponies to join PETA. However, I feel that your story could be a truly inspirational one which could create an entire new subculture of carnivorism.

Uhh... maybe you needed to recalibrate your machines? No matter how much drugs that pony has in her system, I don't think they should be able to overload any system without killing her. Then again, maybe Pinkie Pie has become so unbelievably overdosed that her body is starting to turn into a drug?

That would explain a lot about your behavior, actually.

So, this is good! It sounds like you had a lot of fun stalking Pinkieus Piecus, it sound really fun! Bees flying around and stinging everypony! Falling down inconveniently placed stairs! Having an anvil dropped on your head for no real reason! Imma call you Twile E. Coyote (Hornycus Horsius Bitchicus)!

Oh that is awesome! I can taste purple! Oh yeah, and Pinkie Pie must have had a real doozy! I mean, going all the way into the deadly forest and chased by a hydra! Hey, what do you think would happen if you just gave one head drugs? Would they all get high or just the one monkey!

I love this shit! Prophecy or no prophecy, this shit is so fucking awesome! I feel so light! I believe I can fly! My mane tastes like cotton candy! The cake is a lie!

I CAN SEE THE FUTUUUUURE!!!

Your high-as-balls ruler, Princess Celestia.

P.S.: Honk