Of And Dot

by not plu


And Past

And Past

She deserves it.

I can see the pain on her face, every twinge of agony, the life draining from her, drop by drop, and I’ll admit I take sort of sick pleasure in it.

But she deserves it.

I’m not, definitely not, going to help her. Why would I?

She deserves it.

I don’t care if you call me crazy. I’ve been called that a billion times already. “Crazy” can’t get to me. But I hear you. You’re asking “why?”. I can hear your pathetic little voice, pleading with me to save her, or at least explain why “she deserves it”.

I’m not going to help her. No one was there to help me.

And while she, Twila Sparks, the darling of our ruler, was doted upon and received love and affection and support and encouragement, I got nothing.

I had my darkness. My solitude. The iciness seeping into my skin, winding its way around every cut, bruise, and scrape. But mostly I had the words. I was never told anything but how unimportant and useless I am, just a pawn, only useful for my malleability.

I can’t... argue with that.

But maybe... maybe now...

I’ve captured the queen, Luna. The game’s won.
I did everything you asked of me.
Look at her, dying.
I won, Luna.
I’m here.

Don’t ever think you’re important. That’s what’s wrong with her- she let it all go to her head. Just look at her. You don’t want to end up that way, my meretrix? Don’t worry, you won’t. You’re nothing. You’re useless. You’ll be forgotten. You’re nothing but a tool to me, a stepping stone to my end goal. You’re inferior. Come here... repeat it. Useless... unimportant... why aren’t you repeating it? Idiot! Are you- are you crying, you little irrumator, I thought you could withstand a little pain. You’re worthless, moecha putida. Go get the salt and I’ll teach you Latin.
Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo...

Look at me, I’m the monster, the monstrum. I...

But she deserves it. She was everything I couldn't be. She deserves it, she deserves it...

Does she?