//------------------------------// // A Dish of Power, with a side of Surprise // Story: Of Gods and Ponies // by FoggyHunter //------------------------------// White. That is all I see. Just blank white all around me. Is this a dream? Is this limbo? I don’t even know. I can’t even feel my own body. I should be freaking out right now, but all I can feel is calm. I can’t explain it, but it feels like I should be here for some reason. I may feel that way, but I sure as hell don’t think so. “Hello, young one,” I hear a voice say. It sounds like the voice of a really old guy, like a man in his 80’s or 90’s. “Who’s there?” I reply. “Someone who has been watching you since the moment you came to the land of Equestria.” “What? Why?” “Because, young one, I have brought you here for a purpose.” “Wait, you brought me here? What the hell, man?! You ripped me from my home and family! Why the dick move!?” “I did it for the survival of this world.” “... Well you could have at least asked me first.” “I had no way to contact you, only to summon you.” “Well fuck, send me back then!” “I can not.” “Why the fuck not!?” “Because should I send you back, then this world will die.” “Bullshit! What does me being here have to do with keeping the world alive!?” “Silence yourself and I will explain.” “Ok, but it would be nice to actually see you instead of all this nothingness.” … “So be it.” A wrinkled, old man wearing plain brown robes materializes in front of me. He is bald and has the whitest, longest Fu Man Chu moustache I have ever seen. He appears to be floating (or sitting on an invisible floor) with his legs crossed in a lotus position. “My name,” the old man spoke with the same voice as before, “is Ragnarok. Or at least, that’s what it used to be.” “Used to be?” “A long story, one that I will try to shorten as much as possible.” He takes a deep breath before continuing. “Do you know of the Sister Princesses who rule Equestria?” “Celestia and Luna? Yea, what about them?” “They would have their subjects believe that the creation of Equestria came from the unification of three pony tribes.” “Hearts Warming Eve, right?” Well that surprised him. “You know of it?” “Yea. Where I’m from, Equestria and its inhabitants are part of a cartoon show that I like.” “Cartoon?” He asked, puzzled. His eyes are closed now. I think he’s either trying to comprehend it or concentrating on... something. Wait, why is he smiling? “I see,” He says next, “ So she has succeeded.” “Who’s succeeded?” “Nothing important right now, there is still much that I must tell you.” Gah, whatever. I’ll keep quiet for now. “The truth of Equestria’s creation is much different then what they would have the ponies believe. You see, long ago, long before Celestia or Luna came into existence, the world was completely ruled by us: humans, much like your world is now. And much like your world, the humans of long ago fought and bickered with one another. Nations formed and waged war on each other. The world was in a constant state of violence.” “So what changed? We blew ourselves up, didn’t we?” “In a sense, yes. It was the doing of a few revolutionaries. A small group of scientists and philosophers that made an extraordinary discovery. They discovered that humans do indeed have souls, and that there is power within the souls of humans. It is a power, an energy that humanity had never considered before. When the revolutionaries made their discovery, they chose to hide it from the rest of humanity. I do not remember when they decided to take action, but take action they did. Through the span of several years, they constructed a device that would harness this energy. They wished it to make the living of humans better. Using humanities own energy to power their appliances and vehicles. Unfortunately, the energy of a single human soul is minuscule, almost non existent. The revolutionaries did not realize this until too late. When they had finished the device, they had set it to collect enough energy to power the entire world. When the device was activated, humanity as we had known it ceased to exist.” Wow. Ok, this is some pretty far fetched shit, man. “Mankind would have become extinct that day. It should have become extinct. But something happened, something that even after centuries of living I still cannot understand. The energy of the souls of humanity converged on one of the revolutionaries, seemingly at random. and through that revolutionary, the energy transferred to the world as a whole. That lone revolutionary became the soul survivor of the entire event, and in time discovered that he held control over the power that had been harvested from his own species. Already the world around him was changing, being reformed by the energy that now flowed through it. Thousands of years of evolution happened in the blink of an eye. Land masses crumbled and reformed within minutes. The cities of man were swept away by the new global evolution. All evidence that humanity had existed was erased, save for the lone revolutionary. And it was this lone revolutionary that crafted much of what Eqestria is now. He wished to use his new found powers to create a land of peace and prosperity, but knew that such a place would be impossible with humans. So he crafted a new species, with four different breeds.” Ok, I think I’m starting to get it now. “He created the four pony types and infused them with a small amount of his own blood. The reason for this is because only those with human blood can use the energy of the world, and that energy would guarantee the peace of the land, or so he hoped. Those that received the least concentration of his blood became the earth ponies, adept at tilling and working the land. Next came the pegasus ponies, who’s human blood would allow them to use the energy of the world to aid in their flight and interact with the winds themselves. Then he created the unicorns, ponies with the sole purpose to master the energy of the world in order to make life easier for all. Lastly, he created two beings with the traits of all three, and the greatest concentration of his blood. These two were tasked to watch over the others with wisdom and kindness, and to lead them should they ever go astray.” “Don’t tell me. These two were Celestia and Luna, and your actually the revolutionary.” He gives an amused hmph before saying, “You catch on quickly.” “Didn’t take a genius to figure that one out.” “No, I suppose not.” “One last question before you continue with your shpeal. You said that the power of human souls combined with the world?” “That is correct, and I believe I know what you are going to ask. Magic, as the ponies have come to call it, is in reality the combination of human souls.” “Wow.... That’s an interesting... concept to grasp....” “May I continue?” “Yeah, sure.” “Very well then. That was over five thousands years ago. The sisters and I lived on thanks to our connection with the world, while the other ponies lived out their lives like all mortals do, their descendants continuing the species. There was peace in the land, and we were free of any threats. This continued for the next thousand years or so.” “So what happened?” Ooh... doesn’t look like he likes that question very much. “... Discord happened.” Oh shit, no wonder he doesn’t like that question. “It was an event I should have foreseen, and that I was more than capable of preventing. You see, the creation of Discord was no one’s fault but my own. It was at that time that Celestia and Luna finally began to mature. Think of it as their teen years.” Dam, they must age really slowly. “Though I had created them to be peaceful and caring, the intelligence and personalities of pony kind is still based upon that of human kind. As such, they are still susceptible to the throws of conflict, and there was much of this during that time. We were a family before then, but we turned into a dysfunctional family. Emotions ran wild, and I should have been more composed. But I was so used to being the ‘god’ of Equestria that I did not think to control my emotions. Then, when the conflict and drama hit boiling point, it happened. My emotions tore away from me, and through my direct connection with magic they formed into a sentient being. This being would become known as Discord, the Spirit of Chaos. The tear had left me weakened, and Discord took advantage of my weakened state. He stole my body from me, warped it into his own image, and cast away my conscious into the streams of magic that run through the world. My spirit had rebelled against my soul. I, however, refused to give in and let my soul die. In my one and final attempt to right my mistake, I gathered what power I had, and used it to form a physical object that would act as a gate way to the streams of magic in its purest form. What I had intended to create was one key, but instead the six Elements of Harmony were formed. The rest, as you would say, is history.” Wow, I have just learned of the very creation of Equestria itself. What Twilight wouldn’t do to be her right now. But still... “Cool story, bro. But that still doesn’t explain why I’m needed to keep the world alive.” “(Sigh) Ever to the point. The reason that you are needed is because without the proper conduit to focus the magic of the world, it will eventually fade and ultimately disappear. This world will not survive without magic, and if magic fades away, the very structure of the planet will deteriorate. A cataclysmic event that will leave the world devoid of life. I was originally this conduit, and I am still, if just barely. However, my will alone has kept me in existence throughout these centuries, and it is now beginning to wain. Every day a little more of me is lost within the streams of magic, and it will not be long before I am completely consumed. My power is at it’s limit, and all I want to do now is rest.” “So I’m going to be this... conduit?” “No, young one. You already are.” Wait, “What?” “Because you are human, you became the conduit the moment you arrived. Did you not feel the magic of the world empowering you, making you stronger?” “Well I did get a bit of a muscle spurt while in that forest.” “Precisely. The magic recognized your blood, your soul, and concentrated on you. It flowed through you and its power became your own. Now that you are here, I can finally go to my final rest.” “Wait a minute, your not even going to give me a choice in this?” “I can not afford to. My hold over the magic has wained, and attempting to send you back would be to sign the death warrant of this world. Please understand that I had to do this for the sake of all the souls that call this world home.” I can understand. Doesn’t mean I like it any, though. “So I’m stuck here for good.... Fuck. Are you going to at least tell me how to use magic?” “No. I will leave that for you to discover yourself. Think of it as a good learning experience.” God damn what a troll. Fucker’s got the smile going and everything. “As a last request from a dieing old man, please use this power wisely. Beware of the conflict that can occur between your soul and your spirit. You must keep your mind and emotions focused, or you will lose your power over yourself. Eqeustria does not need another Discord.” Amen to that. “Good luck, Joseph Conrad. The world is now yours.” He’s starting to fade away. I think now would be the appropriate time to say this. “Rest in peace, you trollin’ old bastard.” The last thing I see of him is that god dam troll face he’s making. I open my eyes and see the fire place that I have been sleeping next to for who knows how long. There’s plenty of light, must be morning. I close my eyes again as I reminisce what I had just witnessed. I can remember the whole exchange in it’s entirety, so it couldn’t have been just a simple dream. This means that I have a lot of information to wrap my head around. For instance, HOLY SHIT MAGIC IS HUMAN SOULS! Twilight would flip her shit if she found out that whenever she uses a spell, she is really using the soul of a being long dead. I think I’ll lay it on her just to see her reaction. Then there’s the entire beginning of Equestria itself. Celestia knows dam well how Equestria came to be, so why does she hide it? What could possibly be her motive? I’m sure I’ll find out eventually, but part of me doesn’t even want to. Then there’s the fact that I am the only thing standing between the entire world and certain destruction. That’s a heavy load to just plop down on a guy’s shoulders. What do I have to do? Is there some special ritual I have to do just to make sure the world goes round? No, wait, Celestia does that already. After all, making the earth spin on it’s axis is a lot more believable than making the sun itself move across billions of miles of void space in the time of a day. Planet may be magical, but I doubt the whole universe is. I spend the next who knows how long just thinking over what I had just learned and its implications. I am never going to see my friends and family again. Years of preparing for college have just been wasted. My entire life as I have known it is gone. Yea, thanks a bunch Ragnarok, you fucking prick. Still, the idea of using magic is quite appealing. Fuck it, if I’m going to be stuck here for centuries, I might as well have some fun. You know, now that I think about it, I really should have asked him: of all the creatures to turn sentient, why ponies? Why not something more human looking, like elves or something? Ok, admittedly a show about peaceful magical elves doesn’t sound as good as a show about peaceful magical ponies. I open my eyes again and see a small ball of white. My vision focuses and I recognize Angel Bunny. Despite how cute this little guy is, he is giving me the most suspicious look that I think a cartoon rabbit is capable of. That’s another thing, if the world was regular before, why does it look like a cartoon now? Meh, probably magic. Angel puts his paw in front of his eyes, and then points that same paw at me in a clear “I’m watching you,” message. He’s hopping away now, so I guess that’s all he wanted to do. I guess I should be intimidated, but the fact that he’s a rabbit just kills it for me. I get myself into a sitting position and stretch my back, which responds with several loud pops. I then crack my neck and knuckles, just out of habit. I may have a new body but sleeping on the floor still leaves a guy sore. I just noticed, I’m damn hungry. I haven’t eaten anything since I i got here. I hope Fluttershy’s awake. “Twilight. Hey Twilight!” Twilight awakes with a start at the call of her name. “(Yawn) What is it Spike?” “How long are you going to lay in middle of the floor?” Twilight looks around herself and realizes that she is indeed laying in the middle of the library floor. Surrounding her are open books and loose papers, including the book she had just been using as a pillow. “Were you studying all night again?” Spike asks. “It’s almost 9 you know.” “(Yawn) Is it really that late?” “Check for yourself,” Spike replies while pointing to a wall mounted clock, which reads as 8:49. “Alright, alright, I’m getting up.” As Twilight is doing so, Spike reaches down and picks up one of the books out of curiosity. What he finds puzzles him. “Hey Twilight, I thought you were studying creation magic.” “I was.” “Then why do you have Creatures of Myth out?” Twilight freezes in place as the events from yesterday flash through her mind. “Oh my gosh, that’s right,” Twilight frantically says while rushing to her writing desk. “What’s right?” Spike asks. Twilight is rewriting the letter she had prepared to Celestia yesterday as she says, “There’s a new creature at Fluttershy’s Cottage. I’ve been trying to find out what it is and have come up with nothing. None of these books hold anything that is remotely similar to it~ er him.” “Him?” “Fluttershy thinks it’s a male, but honestly I couldn’t tell.” “So, uh, what does... he look like?” Twilight ponders for a moment before saying, “He looks kinda like a really big, hairless monkey, except his ears and mouth aren’t as large.” Spike thinks for a minute before saying, “Well that just gives me the weirdest image I can think of.” “I know it’s not very accurate right now, but I bet you’ll get to see him later. Fluttershy promised that I could study him after he feels better.” “Wait, what happened?” Twilight shuddered as she remembered the wounds. She had never seen that much blood before, and it disturbed her. “He was hurt, really badly. Fluttershy had me heal him with a spell, but I don’t know when he will actually feel better.” Twilight finishes her letter before rolling it into a scroll and sealing it with wax. “Here, Spike. Send this off.” Spike complies without question as he takes the scroll. He holds it in front of him before taking a big inhale, and then exhaling green fire onto the scroll. The scroll burns up immediately before the ashes, mixed with magic sparkles, floats out the window and towards the capitol. “Hey Twilight, is this new creature... dangerous?” “I don’t know, he was unconscious when I healed him, and I didn’t get a chance to stay to see him wake up.” Then a thought came to Twilight. “But, what if he is dangerous? That means Fluttershy is with him alone. Oh no, I hope she’s ok...” As Twilighte’s worry increases, Spike speaks up. “I’m sure she’s fine. This is the Stare Master we’re talking about, right?” Twilight thinks it over before conceding to the fact that their shy pegasus friend did stare down a fully grown dragon once. “I suppose your right, I just hope she’ll b~” ZZZZAAAAPPP Twilight is interrupted by a blinding light and the sound of a teleportation spell being used. While Twilight is temporally blinded by the light, Spike was facing away from the spell, so his eyes were spared. He turns around towards the origin of the spell and gasps. Standing in the center of a newly created scorch mark is Celestia herself, her face in an expression that Spike can’t recognize. “P-Princess Cellestia!” Spike blurts out before bowing. “What?” Twilight cries out confused, still blind from the flash of light. Before she can even think a second thought, Celestia speaks. “Where is he?” “W-what?” “The creature, where is he?” Celestia asks again, anxiety clearly replacing her normal motherly tone. “P-Princess, I, uh, why do you~” “Twilight, it is imperative that I know where he is. Please, Twilight.” Now Twilight is starting to have an internal freak out. Princess Celestia, co-ruler of Equestrai and goddess of the sun is practically begging for her help. What is going on? What can possibly make the Princess act this way? “I’m-I’m sorry your highness, but I can’t see.” Immediately Celestia’s horn glows and with just a touch of magic, Twilight regains her sight. “Now, where is he?” Celestia’s anxiety only seems to increase as time passes. Now able to see, Twilight responds, “H-He’s at Fluttershy’s cottage. Why, is something wrong? Is he dangerous?” Celestia seemed to not have heard her question as she says, “I have to make sure. Lead the the way Twilight, and with haste.” Though Twilight is still confused out of her wits, she complies and leads Celestia out of the library and towards Fluttershy’s cottage as fast as her legs can carry her. Not two seconds after leaving the library, Twilight spots Pinkie Pie, along with Applejack, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash, speeding towards her. “Hiya, Twilight,” Pinkie Pie cheerfully says as she bounces herself along side Twilight. “Girls, what are you doing here?” Twilight asks while still galloping towards Fluttershy’s Cottage with Celestia flying above her. “Oh, well I had another one of my twitchy twitchies and it was another doozy and I knew it had something to do with you and Princess Celestia so I got all our friends together except for Fluttershy cause I haven't got to her yet in fact we’re going to get her right now but anyway I was totally right. Oh, hiya your highness, what are you doing here?” Celestia remains silent. It is at this point that Celestia’s anxiety is made clear to the other ponies. They can see the look on her face and they can not tell whether she’s excited or scared. All they know is that she is acting strangely, and this worries them greatly. “Twilight, darling,” Rarity says in a whisper while galloping next to the said unicorn, “Would you by chance know what has gotten into our most benevolent ruler?” “No, Rarity I don’t,” Twilight answers in a similar whisper, “and that’s what scares me the most. I think it has something to do with the new creature that Fluttershy is taking care of.” “Creature, what kinda new creature?” Applejack asks next in her southern accent, also in a whisper. “We don’t have time to go into detail. You’ll find out when we get there.” “Well I’m flying ahead to find out myself.” Rainbow Dash says before taking off in a blur of rainbow and cyan. “Dash, wait,” Twilight calls, but it is already too late. Rainbow Dash is way out of earshot. However, to everypony’s surprise, Celestia takes off after her without a word, matching the cyan pegasus’s speed within seconds. “Wowy zowy, the Princess is really-eally fast!” Pinkie Pie exclaims in awe. “Twi, what exactly ar’ we up agenst?” Applejack asks, clearly worried. “I don’t know. I’ve never seen Princess Celestia like this before.” “Well let us hurry then, before something awful happens.” Rarity suggests. The others agree with a nod before continuing towards Fluttershy’s Cottage. I’ve come to notice that the ceiling of this cottage is too low for me, and I need to lean down a bit in order to not hit my head. It’s starting to strain my back. “Hey Fluttershy, I’m going outside to stretch a bit.” “Ok,” she quetly responds from the kitchen. When I got up, I found out that Fluttershy was already awake and feeding the animals outside. When she came back inside, she immediately got started on a meal for me. I told her that I like nuts and fruit, so she decided to make something from those ingredients. It’s a good thing I was already vegan before I got here, cause I would have probably missed eating meat if I wasn’t. I open the door and step outside. I have to bend really low to get out, almost on my hands and knees. It’s amazing that I didn’t hit my head on the door frame when I collapsed yesterday. I bring myself to my full height again and throw my hands above my head as I stretch my back. I’m still wearing nothing but my underwear, but I don’t think I mind that much. After all, these ponies don’t wear any clothing. I’m still going to need some clothes, though. Maybe Fluttershy can convince Rarity to make me some. Now that I think about it, my entire time here has been extremely cliche. In the fan fics, Fluttershy has always been the first to meet humans in Equestria, and for good reason. She’s probably the only one that wouldn’t completely freak out at the sight of one of us. I’m personally glad I met Fluttershy first. It shows that the show is pretty accurate at portraying these ponies. Meeting Pinkie Pie is going to be scary though. She may be bubbly but she’s unpredictable, and that’s what scares me the most. Then there’s Celestia herself. I am not looking forward to that meeting mainly because I have no idea how she’s going to react to me. Ragnarok said that he created them, but it was during their teen years that everything went to hell. Do they hold a grudge against him because he brought about the creation of Discord? Do they even know that he created Discord? And if they do, do they know that he didn’t mean to? I wonder if Luna will react the same way Celestia will? My internal pondering is interrupted when I hear what sounds like a jet coming towards me. I look up and see a rainbow streak coming straight for me. “Ah crap,” I say out loud. Chances are Rainbow Dash isn’t going to take kindly to me. As expected, Rainbow Dash comes to a complete stop mid air when she gets close enough to see me clearly. “Woah, what in the hay is that?” I hear her ask. “Pfft. Nice to meet you too,” I say under my breath. Wait, now there’s a new streak coming across the sky. Might be another pegasus, but I’ve never seen a pegasus that leaves a streak of light blue, turquoise, purple, and pink in the show. …. Oh shit. Celestia’s here? I’m fucked, aren’t I? Celestia reaches the cottage and lands only about twenty feet away from me. She comes down hard, shaking the ground and leaving cracks in the paved path that leads straight to the cottage door, and straight to were I’m standing. Yep, I’m fucked. If I’m going to die today, I’m going to stand my ground like a man. Celestia had her head down when she landed, and now she brings it up and takes her first look at me. She gasps and just stares at me in shock. …. Ok... I’m pretty sure she would have killed me by now if she was the xenophobic bigot that all the fan fics make her out to be. “It’s... it’s true...” Wow, this is starting to freak me out more than I thought it would. She takes a step forward before saying, “You... you have returned.” Wait, what? She’s smiling now, so that’s good. Wait, is she... crying? “After so long, you have finally returned to us!” Celestia exclaims excitedly, despite the fact that tears are now freely flowing down her cheeks. What the hell is goin~ OH GOD!!! Celestia tackles me to the ground in a vice like hug. I just got glomped by the Goddess of the Sun. U jelly? Cause I’m not. It’s really hard to breath right now. I look up and see Rainbow Dash, and I swear, the face she has right now is priceless. “I’ve missed you so much, Father.” “Wait, what?” I wheeze out. Ah crap. She must think I’m Ragnarok. This is going to get really awkward. I hear several gasps as I see the rest of the mane six come onto the scene. “Uh, lady,” I try to say through the crushing hug, “I think you have the wrong guy.” “What?” Celestia asks surprised, rearing back from the hug. I cough a bit as air returns to my lungs. I get myself back on my feet and find that I’m actually a little taller than Celestia, if you don’t count the horn. I rub the back of my head as I say, “Uh, Princess Celestia, I assume.” Wow, never thought I’d see her blush, but damn is her face red. Based off of humans indeed. “Uh, yes. I am Princess Celestia. I, uh, apologize for my behavior. I’m... not quite sure what came over me.” Ok.... I’ll be honest, I would have rather confronted Tyrant Celestia, or Trollestia, or even Molestia. At least then I would have been slightly prepared. But this. My mind is not prepared for this. Does she act like this often here? I look towards the other ponies and judging by their expressions I can safely assume that no, she does not. All of my preconceived notions of Celestia have been completely shot out the window, with a cannon. Celestia regains her composure and clears her throat before saying, “Allow me to give you a proper welcome.” And I’m pretty sure what she does next breaks my brain. Celestia bows and says, “Welcome to Equestria, my lord.”