//------------------------------// // Gratitude // Story: Of Delicate Things... And Hard Work... // by ladydestinae //------------------------------// She awoke with a mild start, and the sleep in her eyes obscured the view around her. The sun poured into the room, but that was all she could really make of it. Oh Celestia, had that been a dream? Did she not really say what was in her heart? Her thoughts were interrupted by sudden movement, although it was ever so subtle. She felt breathing, slow and gentle breathing, the kind that clearly came from a relaxed pony. She froze for moment; for fear that it was somehow just her head playing a very cruel joke. Another breath and then a very quiet sigh, the warmth against her body, and the sensation of a very soft mane brushing against her chest all pointed to this somehow being very real. She closed her eyes, just in case this moment weren’t true, and tried to take a picture in her mind. Then, another sigh, it sounded like a sigh of pure bliss. As though for whomever it was from, this was the happiest she could possibly be. Alright, time for a look. She slowly opened her soft emerald eyes, and she carefully turned her gaze downward. She felt her heart jump into her throat at the sight of her. She had caught the last breath attempting to leave her, for fear of disturbing the fragile pony that was wrapped around her waist. She could scarcely believe this was real, no matter how many times she reminded herself that it was. She quietly studied the features of Fluttershy’s face. All of them seemed so fragile, like the simple act of nuzzling them could shatter their graceful perfection, but all the while Applejack still wanted to kiss those beautiful lips. It was sort of foreign to her, that kind of thinking felt girly to her, although whether or not it actually was happened to be a concept not entirely within her realm understanding to begin with. She carefully exhaled, still studying the features. She knew the color of her eyes by heart; they shimmered with a deep aqua tone that made Applejack feel like she was losing herself in an ocean of innocence. But, somehow, being closed made her eyes look so much more breathtaking to her. It was this moment of serene still, this heavenly absence of motion, that highlighted her real grace. She gazed down the flowing pink mane that seemed to engulf her, threatening to fool some unworthy onlooker into thinking that Applejack herself had a pink coat. It just felt indescribable to be here, to have her so close, and to be able to feel the beat of her wonderfully kind heart and each individual breath as they came and went. What had she done to deserve this moment? • • • She could not recall a single moment in her life when she felt safer than she felt right then. She felt the last remnants of a wonderful dream threatening to fade from her mind as she stirred in her sleep, but even though she was on the precipice of consciousness she could still somehow feel the warmth of the farmpony she loved. Just a little longer… I don’t want this dream to end… She felt a single suppressed breath beneath her delicate frame, and felt compelled to bury herself further into the warm presence she felt around her. It was something quite strong, very sturdy and it felt so right to her. As she nuzzled into her newfound warm and snuggly pillow, she thought more about the dream she had. She had felt so nervous approaching the farmpony, scared to say her true feelings and unwilling to let them stay hidden any longer. It was a surprise to her that she was able to say it, but it was heartbreaking to watch her friend frozen like that. She didn’t know when she had fallen asleep after running home as fast as she was able, but, that didn’t diminish the beauty of the dream. The knock at the door, the confession, the kiss, it was all just perfect to her. • • • All at once, it crept inside of her head before she realized what was happening. It was a harsh twinge of self doubt that overtook her mind and swiftly began to strangle her. She tried desperately to focus on slowing her breathing; she didn’t want some senseless anxiety to disturb this moment. More importantly, she didn’t want to disturb the angelic visage in her embrace. A soft voice, no louder than a whisper, reached out from the ensuing darkness. “Applejack…?” She suddenly felt herself grounded, and turned her gaze back to Fluttershy’s eyes. Although they were open, they were filled with a mixture of sleep and concern. “Did I wake you? I’m sorry, sugarcube,” she finally replied. Fluttershy snuggled into Applejack a bit more, pulling the blankets of her bed tighter around them both. “It’s alright…,” she started; her voice projecting a tone of apathy to her conscious state followed by genuine concern towards her friend, “Are you alright…? You look a little upset…” She didn’t really know how to respond. It wasn’t that she didn’t know what was wrong, what her voice was screaming at her brain. She could hear all her words, all about how she was a cowpony and she was built strong and durable and how she was, in most every way that mattered, the least appropriate pony for Fluttershy. She hated herself for thinking it. She focused on a fixed point on Fluttershy’s bedroom ceiling, screwing up her courage. It wasn’t as though she was about to confide any of this in, say, Rainbow Dash. She felt certain that would only illicit a lot of mocking. No, she was talking to Fluttershy, the kindest pony she knew. She handled everything delicately, and took everypony’s feelings seriously. She could do this. Right…? “Ah… Ah dunno if this is the time--…” “You can always talk to me, Applejack, I don’t mind…” “Right, well… um…” Fluttershy remained silent, nuzzling Applejack under her chin in such a delicate way it was all she could to hold still. She felt at ease, at least, but she was still struggling to keep a grip on her self control. She really did want to say what was on her mind; it was just a matter of getting the words together from the enormous jumble. “Fluttershy…,” she began, immediately taking note of how she used her name instead of calling her sugarcube, “Ah…,” her voice trailed off without her consent. It annoyed her inside, but she ignored that and proceeded to build up the courage and strength for another attempt. “Ah… ah know what ah like about you… love about you… and ah’ll tell ya, if ya like… but…,” she paused to collect herself, even though she had already closed her eyes she still found herself stopping for the moment to decide if there wasn’t a more suitable substitute for, “well… Why me…?” Fluttershy blinked, taking in the question and carefully considering it as she continued to snuggle into the farmpony. Alright, that could mean a lot of things. She really needed to know more in order to give the straw-maned mare an answer she deserved. “…what do you mean?” she asked, looking up at Applejack. Applejack had settled down, and Fluttershy could feel that. She had been listening to Applejack’s heart beat as she spoke, carefully memorizing each thump and shudder for prosperity. “Fluttershy… Ah really like ya… but… Ah never thought… that a mare such as yerself… all graceful and delicate-like… and beautiful… and…,” she was trying to stop herself from showering Fluttershy with flattery, if only to be able to carry on her thought, “..well… Ah… Ah’m not… any of them things…” Fluttershy felt her cheeks burning, but was nonetheless focused on Applejack’s concerns. She finally understood exactly what the orange mare meant by her original question. She couldn’t believe that Applejack didn’t think better of herself, and she felt the need to correct this create a kind of unabashed resolve within herself. “Applejack… Do you remember Dodge Junction…?” she began, not waiting for an answer, “Do you remember what I said to you that day…? After you finally told the truth to us…?” Applejack closed her eyes and thought back, she remembered exactly what had been said. It was more of a fond memory of Fluttershy, than a memory of her own stubborn pride getting in the way of her friendships again. “…we’ll never be able to fix the hole in our hearts.” “Yeah…” “You fill my heart up… You make me feel safe, Applejack… You’ve always been there for me… You’ve always been the one to stick up for me… I remember when that mean old dragon was snoring up a lot of smoke over Equestria… I was so scared… I couldn’t move my wings and… then I couldn’t move myself… then you stayed behind, and worked very hard to bring me up the mountain another way…” “You’re strong… I mean… I know that I’m strong too, in my way… kind of… but you… You’re brave… You don’t even hesitate to jump to somepony’s rescue… or to carry their scared little bodies up a mountain when they can’t do it for themselves…” “It’s more than that though… a lot more…,” she sighed happily, snuggling into Applejack once again. “You’ve got a wonderful heart… I love your heart… I love how hard you work for your family, and for your friends… I love how honest you are… I don’t think I can trust anypony as much as you…,” she exhaled dreamily. Those were the most positive things she could remember ever hearing about herself all at once. She had some trouble believing some of the things that were said. The really important part was not so much what was being said, but the gentle voice that was saying these things. Fluttershy was telling her these things when no more than a day ago she didn’t know if Fluttershy even realized she existed. Well that was a stupid thought; Fluttershy was her friend for a long time, so of course she knew she existed. But, the thing was, she’d always been a farmpony, working the land and toiling for as long as she could remember. She never had any of that ladylike grace or fancy poise, she was rugged and rough and, well, a brute. She had just come to accept it about herself. “But… Ah’m nopony special… just a rodeo lovin’ workhouse that spends most of her time covered in dirt and sweat.” “My rodeo loving workhorse that spends most of her time covered in dirt and sweat.” Fluttershy corrected. Applejack blinked, a silly grin crossed her lips, she was very glad to hear what Fluttershy had just said. “I’ve always liked you for who you are, Applejack. I take you for all of your good, and your bad. I don’t want you to change, okay? You are wonderful just as you are.” Applejack took a deep breath, and smiled. “Sugarcube, Ah take ya for all of yer good, and yer bad too,” she replied, not wanting to leave such a lovely sentiment unreciprocated. Suddenly, without any warning, she felt the most delicate lips she had ever known press firmly against hers, the rest of the world melted away and she could only hear the birds sing their tune to the morning sky and the thumping of her own heart.