“Perspective’s fuckin’ crazy, man”
Chapter 1
Fluttershy just stood there, smiling. It wasn’t an innocent smile how Pinkie Pie had remembered; it was the smile of one with experience. It was a smile of sass, sadism, and seductiveness. “Well I’m glad you remember my name, douche,” she said light-heartedly, stretching out a hoof to shake. What Fluttershy got instead was a sudden embrace from her long-time friend with an audible thud. At first, she was dumbstruck, and a little angry. But, she remembered just who was hugging her, and Fluttershy returned her friend’s loving embrace. Fluttershy reached up her hoof and patted the back of Pinkie’s mane. Fluttershy felt moisture on her shoulder. Either she’s drooling on me or she’s crying.
“Don’t be such a doormat next time, alright? It’s okay.” Wow, Fluttershy hasn’t empathized in a while, and that hit her hard. In a comedic way, though. Pinkie giggled.
“I never expected to hear that coming from you,” Pinkie said through teary eyes. “To be honest, I never expected to hear from you at all.”
“Yeah, well, shit happens. Hey, what are you doing out here in the first place? What happened?”
Pinkie Pie looked down and wiped her tears away with her hooves. She didn’t have the heart to tell her that she was an alcoholic. Meekly, she said, “I… did some pretty stupid stuff. Made stupid decisions and trusted stupid people. ‘Shy? I’m outta work, I got kicked out of my apartment and I have a really bad hangover.” Fluttershy lit up. Nowhere to go? No purpose? Trying to get away from the past? Sounds familiar. Well, except for the hangover.
“If that’s the case, Pinkie… do you want to come with me?” Pinkie Pie shot up, any hint of depression melting away. She exploded into a huge gasp.
“R-really?! Where do ya live?” she asked with great enthusiasm that made Fluttershy feel exhausted just by standing next to her.
Fluttershy furrowed her brows and looked away with a smile on her face. “I’m afraid I can't just tell you.”
Instead of saying anything, Pinkie Pie just cocked her head in a way that said, “Why?”
The yellow Pegasus in the sailor suit just laughed. “I think it’d be easier to show than tell.”
The pink pony nodded skeptically, and trotted after her friend.
Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie trotted through the Port Corral’s neighboring tropical forest at a brisk (and awkwardly silent) pace. After about ten minutes of walking, Pinkie’s hangover started to wear off, and she was getting bored. Fast. She figured she would pry; there was nothing else to do.
“Soo,” Pinkie so’d inquiringly. Fluttershy facehoofed. Subtlety was something Pinkie never learned. Hopefully her questions won’t be too hard to answer. “Black streaks, huh?” Fluttershy shot up and looked at Pinkie skeptically. Surely Pinkie could’ve thought of a more telling question than that. Pinkie just shrugged in response. Fluttershy rolled her eyes.
“I thought they were cool. Without the streaks, I have no authority. I look too sweet and innocent to be threatening to anypony. It makes it easier to earn respect as well,” she listed with a monotone. She looked back at her friend with a twisted smirk. “Plus, it’s kind of sexy, don’t you think?”
Pinkie mulled over her friend for the second time that night, this time taking care to note the more... delicate parts. She didn’t know why, but she never thought about Fluttershy in that way. Fluttershy was too naive and innocent to be though of that way. But looking over her now? Now that she’s so tough and confident? She was very good looking. Like really, REALLY, good looking. Pinkie replied with a zombified “Very.”
Fluttershy was a pretty good judge of character, and wasn’t dense in the least but the suggestiveness of Pinkie's tone flew right over her head, slammed into a tree, and died somewhere in the forest. Fluttershy was straight as a board, over all. Oblivious to her friend's impure thoughts, she replied to Pinkie with a resolute, “Thought so.”
Pinkie shook of her perverse thoughts long enough to think of another question. After some hazy deciding, Pinkie sighed. “Fluttershy?”
Fluttershy craned her neck to face Pinkie. “Yeah?”
“What happened to you? You killed that guy, didn’t you? The Fluttershy I knew wouldn’t hurt a fly. Something went wrong, didn’t it?”
The million dollar question. Fluttershy looked away and gave a distant chuckle. Darkly, she said, “That’s a story for another time, my friend.”
That was another way of saying she’ll never hear it. Pinkie squinted in silent accusation and added “But you’ll tell me it eventually, won’t you?”
“Aye, I think I’ve gone too long without telling it anyway.”
Aye? AYE? Who talks like that anymore? Pinkie had noticed that Fluttershy’s speech pattern was different, and she had a hint of some accent, but she wasn’t able to pin it out until now. The only people that still used that accent were sailors.
Stupid me, she’s wearing a sailor’s uniform for crying out loud. Pinkie inspected the strange outfit her friend was wearing again. It looked like a sailor suit, but it was more messy than she had originally thought them to be. It was a blue overcoat with a white shirt underneath. The sleeves of the overcoat were rolled up, but the white sleeves of the undershirt were still exposed. There was a single brown sash cutting across the white shirt which Pinkie suspected was holding the sheathe of her sword along with any other possible weapons. There was a single saddlebag off to Fluttershy’s side carrying her belongings. It was stylish, sure, but nothing a sailor would wear, not without warranting a reaction from the captain.
“Fluttershy, what’s with the getup?” Pinkie finally asked. Instead of responding, Fluttershy put on a wide smile and extended her hoof at a large bush, implying that there was something behind it. Pinkie raised a brow in question, but Fluttershy just widened her smile and nodded forebodingly. Pinkie inched up to the bush and pushed the large leaves out of the way. What she saw made her jaw drop in wonder.
A large wooden ship thirty feet from the coast was floating there, anchored into the shallow sea. It wasn’t as large as the Legion’s battleships, but it wasn’t far behind. Double masts with rows of ten or odd cannons stationed on each side. The sails were tied up and there were a number of ponies working maintenance on it. While the ship certainly didn’t have as many ponies as it could have, there were at least seventy on the ship. All in all it was a beautiful sight, one that made Pinkie feel small in comparison. “Wooooow,” Pinkie gaped. “You live on that?”
“Aye, that I do.”
“Are you the captain?” Pinkie mused.
Fluttershy shot her a scowl, but smiled shortly after. “Hardly. I wouldn’t trade our captain for the world.”
Fluttershy playfully punched Pinkie’s shoulder and said, “C’mon, let’s get to shore.”
The canoe the two friends were in rocked slowly as the massive ship got bigger and bigger. Pinkie found herself caught up in another silence, this time not awkward but more boooorrring than the last. That’s when Pinkie Pie noticed something odd. “Wait. We’re in Port Corral; why didn’t you guys use the docks?”
Fluttershy chuckled softly. “Well, we’re not welcome by most folk.”
Pinkie raised a brow at this. “But the docks support commercial, private, and military use. Why wouldn’t…”
Pinkie was interrupted by Fluttershy grabbing her head with both her hooves. Pinkie’s heart started racing, but all Fluttershy did was reposition her head to look at the ship. She then whispered in her ear, “Pinkie?”
Pinkie Pie sighed a dreamy “Yeah?”
“See that flag, positioned at the top of the ship?”
Awww. “Yeah,” Pinkie sighed in disappointment.
Fluttershy face straightened in annoyance before adding, “Take a good look at it.”
Pinkie, growing more frustrated, began to retort, “What about it? It’s a flag...“ Pinkie finally realized what her yellow friend meant. It was a black flag, tattered and broken, with a pony’s skull and two crossbones underneath. Pinkie’s mouth got larger and larger with each passing second of the horrid realization.
“YOU’RE A PIRATE?” she stammered in disbelief. Fluttershy (to Pinkie’s dismay) started to laugh maniacally at her pink friend’s reaction. As Fluttershy’s laugh got creepier, Pinkie wondered if it was such a bad idea to get raped and thrown off a bridge.
“BRING HIM IN, YOU UNGREATFUL WHELP!”
The guard standing in front Luna’s throne recoiled at this. But he was just a naval captain, why is she bitc-
“DON’T JUST STAND THERE, GO!”
The guard jumped back once again and dashed off towards the exit. He burst through the other side and began to yell. “You can go in now, you can go in now!”
The beige stallion with the dark brown circle around his one eye simply smiled and shook his head as the guard ran away. He trotted casually into his princess’ throne room.
The princess smiled as she saw the familiar captain walk in. “Ah, greetings Captain Squeak, how dost thou fare?”
Captain Squeak. Luna was the only pony who ever called him that, and he liked it. Most Ponies would call him Captain Pip, for they thought ‘Pipsqueak’ was too demeaning of a name for a Captain. After reassuring them that he loved his name, and it gave him no disrespect, most ponies would then normally refer to him as Captain Pipsqueak. Luna however, after reading his name on the roster, affectionately nicknamed him Captain Squeak. If anyone else called him that, he’d probably deck them in the face, but Luna was a special case. He damn near melted when she first called him that.
“I’m good, Princess,” he said with a bow. “How about ‘thy?’” he teased, giving a wink.
Luna put a hoof to her muzzle and chuckled. If any other pony said that to her, she’d probably send them to the sun, but she strangely enjoyed it whenever Squeak made fun. “I’m doing well.” Her expression darkened and she began to tell him of the small situation that had popped up while he was off duty. “There has been a report from a reliable resource that pirates have popped up around the coastal region of Port Corral. It has been said that a civilian has already been killed. I want you to journey there and get rid of the rogue threat.”
Pipsqueak bowed again and replied with a smooth, “As your will, my Princess.”
“Go, Captain Squeak,” Luna ordered with a smile.
“Ohmygoshwhyareyouapirate ohmygoshwhyareyouapirate ohmygoshwhyareyouapirate,” Pinkie stuttered in dismay. Fluttershy’s scowl was getting more and more touched with irritation as time went on. Fluttershy had tried to time her reveal to be as hilarious as possible whilst giving her the least time with the frustrating and hysterical Pinkie, but she mistimed it a bit.
“Ohmygoshwhyareyouapirate ohmygoshwhyareyouapirate ohmygo-“ Fluttershy shoved her hoof in Pinkie’s mouth to prevent her from continuing to talk.
“Seriously, Pinkie. Shut. The fuck. UP.” Fluttershy took out her hoof and wiped the pink pony’s saliva off on her shirt. Pinkie just stared at her with wide eyes before getting teary.
“Fluttershy? HOW COULD YOU?!” Pinkie started bawling, much to Fluttershy’s annoyance. The row boat they were in finally touched the ship, and Fluttershy began to set up the ladder to be easier to climb for a landlubber like Pinkie.
“C’mon, Pinkie, climb the damned ladder before I throw you overboard.”
Pinkie pie gasped once again and recoiled. “What? You can’t expect me to climb onto a PIRATE SHIP. What’s wrong with you?”
Fluttersigh. “I was hoping I could be all dramatic with this next part, but I guess it’s too late for that.” Fluttershy grabbed Pinkie’s head and looked directly into her eyes. “Pie, I may be a pirate, but this bunch I’m with? They ain’t like normal pirates. They are under the command of Captain Peg-Patches. This guy, he’s amazing. Sure we steal, and we plunder, and sometimes we even kill, but we give to the poor and donate to the sickly. Cap’n Patch is one of the greatest stallions in all of Equestria. His mission… has always been my mission.”
Pinkie Pie tried to process this new information. Carefully she asked, “And what mission is that?”
“Help the less fortunate; heal the sick; bring down the evil.” Fluttershy smiled wistfully. “In other words: be a good person.”
Pinkie Pie mulled over her thoughts for a couple of seconds before finally exhaling. It was Fluttershy, after all. She wouldn't do something as outlandish as joining pirates without a really good reason. “Well… I guess you wouldn’t make a bad choice. If you think it’s right, so do I.”
Fluttershy smiled and kissed Pinkie’s cheek, which made her freeze up in shock. Fluttershy, not noticing her friend stiffen, turned and began to climb up the ladder using her wings to aid her.
“Thanks Pinkie,” she said. “I knew I could count on you.”
“Yeah,” Pinkie replied, breaking out of her reverie. “Sure.”
“Wow, surprised you’re not halfway to the moon by now.” An orange Pegasus with a purple mane said to Captain Pipsqueak. Pipsqueak just rolled his eyes.
“C’mon, Scoots, you know that’s just a rumor to scare little foals with,” Pipsqueak replied, looking back at Canterlot Castle. “She doesn’t actually do that… I think.” Scootaloo giggled in response. “Besides, I spoke to Luna, not Celestia."
“Why not? Was she not in?”
“Nah, she was there, but I chose to speak to Luna.”
“What?” Scootaloo scoffed. “Why?" she asked, giving him a look of disappointment. Pipsqueak didn't really have an answer for that, so he simply put on a large grin. Scootaloo rolled her eyes and looked away from her beige friend. "I don’t understand your fascination with Nightmare Moon, Cap’n Pips.”
Pipsqueak stepped in front of Scootaloo before shoving his hoof in her chest. “Hey, you know as well as I do that she ain’t Nightmare Moon anymore. She’s kind and gentle, alright? She's Luna.”
“Heh, sounds like you got a little crush on her, Cap’n.” Scootaloo nudged her superior. He blushed and stuttered in response.
“N-no! She’s just really cool, okay?”
“Sure, Romeo, sure. Isn’t that blasphemous or somethin’?” Scootaloo mused.
“Erghh,” Pipsqueak groaned. “Why are you my first mate again?”
“’Cause I’m the only one who knows what a wimp you are!” she retorted before locking his head under her leg. They both shared a laugh before heading off to their ship for their eventual journey to Port Corral.
“Something wrong, Rare?” Spike asked, speculation in his voice. Rarity stared off into the night’s horizon. Something was giving her an eerie feeling. She just shook her head and began to trot back to her dragon.
“It’s nothing, Hon,” she reassured. But there was an uncertainty in her voice and a nervous look on her face. Spike raised his eyescales skeptically. “It’s just… that part in my heart… that feeling I got when I used the element… it’s coming back…” Spike shot up and skillfully jumped towards Rarity, but she raised hoof to stop him.
“Calm down, it’s not a bad feeling…” Rarity put the hoof she raised to her chest, and smiled with a sense of nostalgia. “I just haven’t felt this way in over ten years…”
Spike inspected Rarity one more time to make sure she was okay, but that look on her face… he nodded knowingly and stared off into the horizon with her. He whispered, “Guys… We’ll be here… If you’re still alive.”