//------------------------------//
// Chapter V- New Kid in Town 
// Story: Equestria's First Human 
// by Ceehoff 
//------------------------------//


Equestria’s First Human- Chapter V

Written and drawn by Ceehoff



“Did you miss me, hun?” purred a soothing voice.

Connor flinched awake.

Sleepily looking up, he saw that it was that same, beautiful brunette from earlier. Only this time, she was wearing a white, lacey bra and thong. She was sitting on a heart-shape bed lined with blood-red silken sheets. Rose petals were scattered on top. The teenager crossed his arms and eyed her suspiciously.

"What's wrong?" she asked coyly.

“Are you gonna peck my nose up into brain like you did last time?”

“Of course not, silly,” she winked. “I've got something even better.”

“Oh, really?" he asked, raising an eyebrow in interest. "You sure about that?”

She leaned in close and her warm breath spilled onto his nose.

“I’m sure,” she whispered.

Breathing gently, she began to give his nose a love bite with her perfectly straight and white teeth. Her hot breath smelled sweet like strawberries. Connor melted in his place. She stopped, but never backed away. Then, she grabbed the collar of his t-shirt and yanked him down onto the bed with her.

"Whoa-ho-ho! Easy, ma'am," he smirked. "Getting a little impatient here, aren't we?"

"I can't wait any longer," she smiled as she put on... cat ears?

She resumed her business with him. As she did so, Connor's eye's rolled back as he embraced the touch of the beautiful woman.

“Ohhhh, sweet Lord! You are…are sooo amazing doi—Ow. Okay that hurt a little. Be careful next time. Don’t want a bust on my lov—Ow! Dang it! What the—OW! The fu—OW! Stop it! You doing it ag—OWW! Motherfu--!”

Connor flinched awake, literally screaming. Seeing nothing out of the ordinary happening around he sighed in relief.

Oop! His nose was itching. He lifted his hand up to his nose and scratched the surface, until a sharp pain suddenly stopped him. He yelped in surprise and pain. He noticed small speckles of blood on his fingers, and even when he touched his nose, it stung like it had multiple paper cuts on its surface.

How hell did?

Meow...

Then, he saw Opalescence standing directly next to him. It all became clear to him now. Opalescence was gnawing at his nose while he was sleeping. The cat from hell had a smug look on its face, taunting him. A vein popped in Connor’s head.

“That’s it, you putrid furball! YOU’RE DEAD!”

He dove at the furball.


----------


“GAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!” the human screamed.

Rarity was so startled by the noise coming from upstairs, that she nearly dropped an egg she was about to fry for breakfast. She was lucky that she recovered it just before it hit the floor. Being the rather proper and clean mare, she did not wish to clean up an icky mess. Giving an egg a firm tap, she broke the shell and spilled its contents onto the frying pan.

A few minutes later, Connor slowly descended from the stairs. The smirking cat followed behind.

“Good Morning!" Rarity sang, turning to the human. "I hope you like eggs, becauwha-ha-HAAA!!” She saw the ghastly sight that resided on Connor's face, ornate with scratches and bites. It was like his face had been through a whirlwind of paper.

“Ow," he winced, hurting to even blink.

“Oh my heavens, darling! Whatever happened to your face??”

“What do you think has happened?” He pointed to the scratches. The cat sitting near him had a smirk on her face, showing off her work of 'art'. Damn that cat and its quick, little paws.

“Opalescence!” she scolded. “You should be ashamed of yourself! Treating our guest like that! The nerve of you! Today, you will be getting that bath I had reserved for tomorrow!”

The furball hung her head angrily, knowing that she had lost. 

Connor 1 - Cat from Hell 2. (He still had a way to go to lead.)

The unicorn cleared her throat, turning to her houseguest. "So, Connor, do you like eggs?"

“Do I??" he asked, excited. "Yes, I do!"

“Excellent! Take a seat. They'll be ready in less than a minute.”

Connor walked over to the table placed in the middle of the kitchen and sat himself down. Fortunately for him, he had no problem sitting. The chairs and table were a bit smaller in size compared to what he had at home, but it wasn't dramatic. He shifted his rear in the chair, finding a comfortable spot.

It was a vast room like most kitchens. The walls were a light, baby blue, making the kitchen feel relaxing and less bright. 

After he finished looking at the wallpaper, he saw Rarity at the stove, slipping some eggs off of the frying pan and onto a plate. Noticing that he was looking at her, she responded with a friendly smile. He looked away, trying not to stare for too long. After slipping the last egg off the pan, the unicorn approached the table carrying a plate of fried eggs with her magic. She set it carefully down in front of him and sighed with pride, admiring her work.

The two eggs that rested on the plate looked perfect. And by perfect, the texture of the eggs were smooth and glossy like it was depicted in the pictures on food menus. There were no burn marks at all. A small parsley leaf was placed right on the top on each egg yolk.

Oh, if only the restaurants back in his world made eggs look this idealistic and flawless.

Connor was about to dig in until he realized something on the table was missing. He leaned down to look underneath the table.

“What’s wrong? Is the parsley leaf too much?” Rarity asked, curious what he was doing.

“No, the parsley's fine, really! But... where’s the silverware?”

“The silverware?”

“Forks, knives, spoons?”

“Oh, of course! Sorry, darling,” she said, turning to the silverware drawer. “I hardly use silverware at all, because I use my magic to eat. A lot of unicorns do. I never knew why I bought them in the first place.”

She opened the drawer to find all of the silverware covered in a gray film of dust.

“Oh my goodness,” the tidy unicorn grimaced, lifting up a grimy fork. “What a display of much needed tender, loving care. Excuse me for a second.”

Grabbing a swatch of cloth, she wiped the filthy fork only to be met with the grating feel of a crusted layer of dust. 

“Er... Just hold on for another second, if you would please?” she smiled sheepishly.

She dashed over to the sink, turned on hot water, and quickly scrubbed the measly fork.

Connor’s stomach was growling furiously. The eggs in front of him looked too delicious for him to withhold himself. His hands were trembling, tempted to simply pick up the eggs with his hands and shovel them into his mouth.

No, that was silly. If he wanted a better reputation with these ponies, he'd better show some manners, but, on the other hand, he also didn't want the eggs to grow cold. Nothing tasted worse than cold eggs.

Must…resist…eating…with…hands! Must…show…manners!! His arms were shaking furiously.

“There we go! All clean! Enjoy!” the purple-maned unicorn proclaimed, hovering fork over to the human's trembling hands. He grabbed the fork and bit it, thinking they were the eggs because of his unkempt mind. The force of the bite reverberated in his teeth, coursing through his skull.

“G’AAaaaaaah Owowowowowoww!”

Rarity turned from the sink. “Did you say something?”

“No…(ow)…” he said, choking back his pain. He dug the fork into the delectable egg and shoved it in his hungry mouth.

Oh, sweet Lord…

Rarity sat herself in a chair directly across from him as he ate. She quietly and patiently watched as he wolfed down her perfectly cooked eggs. She thought it queer to intently watch somepony eat, but how the human was eating looked pretty amusing. He was practically one of the few Rarity knew who could eat with silverware. Spike was the other.

The human slowed to a stop, noticing the unicorn staring at him. He swallowed the food that was in his mouth.

“Aren’t you gonna have anything?” he asked, stifling a belch.

“I’m fine, darling. I already ate,” she smiled. "Thank you for your consideration, though."

He was about to resume eating, but he couldn’t. Not with her staring at him. He peeked up and saw her sapphire-blue eyes fixed on him.

“Ermmm,” Connor asked. “Is there something on my face?”

“Oh, I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable. It’s just... so strange.”

"What is?"

"The fact that a whole new species exists. So, there is life in the farthest reaches of space. My goodness! Plus, it is an honor to be able to shelter one of them," she smiled politely. "Twilight will be so full of questions about you the next time you meet her."

"Hmm..." he nodded gingerly.

"You won't mind telling me some of the things about your world, would you? I'm just as curious as she is."

"Uhhh..." he hesitated.

Man, what a broad subject. Where would he start?

"Well, we have politics and governments like you. We, uhhh, have a lifestyle like you. Annnnnnd weeeeeeeee... Man, where will I begin? Do I really have to explain everything in detail? I mean, as far as I know, your world is almost like mine."

"Almost?" she eagerly asked, being a junky for details.

"Sorry... I-I'm still pretty tired. Brain's still trying to develop," he said, weaseling himself from having to think.

"Oh... well, of course. Sorry, darling."

Then, Connor resumed eating. Being tired as he looked, he did not feel much like talking. He just wanted to eat.

"Well, when you have the time, I can't wait to hear what you have in store," she smiled. "Also, I will have to relay it to the others. In fact, I will have to go to the spa with Fluttershy real soon. Oh, I'm sure she'll be amazed at what kind of things you have back on your world. Oh! Is it possible that the animals you have on your world are different from ours? Oh, I bet she'll love to hear that as well! She's a real prodigy when it comes animals. The way she communicates with them... It's like she's a mystical creature in a pony's body. It's scary, yet very amazing! Even an untamable animal like Opalescence wouldn't stand a chance against her. I just don't know how she does it, but--."

However, the human's mind had reduced the sound of her talking to incoherent muffled yammering. Ever since the white unicorn mentioned her name, it made him remember that moment when he first met her.

The way she mended his shoulder after he hurt it... No female had ever done something so nice and careless to him, albeit his mother. It was the kind attention he wanted from a girl in a long time. Her presence was charming, yet so strange. In her eyes, he could see himself. Shy, frail, unconfident, scared, self-conscious... It was like looking in a mirror. Only his reflection was more of an adorable pony with a long pink mane and tail, a yellow coat, wings, and big, sad, crystalline, blue eyes.

He shook his head fiercely. What the hell was he thinking? Why was he acting like this around a pony? A freaking pony, for Christ's sake! He should be thinking that way towards a human girl, not an animal.

But... that pony selflessly helped him. What kind of reaction did he get human girls? Nothing.

On the contrary, he would get more reactions from them if he would just get himself out of self pity and get the hell out into the world. He had every opportunity and ability to expand his circle of friends, but his lack of confidence got the best of him.

Still, Fluttershy...

"Connor?"

"Huh? What? I'm not in love with her!" he blurted out before he slapped his palms flat onto his mouth.

"I... wasn't going to ask you that," Rarity said. "I was just wondering if you were going to finish your eggs. They'll grow cold."

"Oh! Sorry, I was just... my mind just dozed off. It's still morning, so (ha ha!) you know."

"Wait... why did you think I was going to ask that?"

"Nothing," he replied.

"Is it because...?" she leaned closer to him.

"Hey, is there any salt?"

"Oh, silly me!" she said as she used her magic to open the spice cabinet and levitate a salt shaker in front of him. "Here you go."

"Thanks," he grinned.

Before Rarity was going to ask again, Connor quickly applied the salt onto his eggs and resumed eating, humming nervously.

"These are really nice eggs, Rarity," he said.

"Thank you, darling," the unicorn nodded in appreciation.

She said nothing more after that, but snuck a closer look at his cheeks, which were glowing with a hot pink.

At first, she looked suspicious, but then, she smiled.


----------


After breakfast, Connor went back over to his bed to put on his sneakers.

“Hey, Rarity, I’m gonna go visit Twilight and Spike!” he called.

“Okay, dearie! Have fun!”

"Heh... 'dearie'," he grinned, enjoying how it sounded.

He opened the door. He was about to blindly walk out, until he found a cream-colored pony with an orange wavy mane and tail standing in front of him just at the doorway. Her hoof was in air, like she was going to knock on the door. Connor opened it just at the nick of time. Seeing the human, the mare’s eyes shot open in fear, and she was gone in an eye blink. Well, that was discouraging.

He sighed half-heartedly before he resumed his way outside.

As he walked, he could not help but admire the weather. It was another perfect day outside, even if it was not cloudy. He always enjoyed cloudy days, because they made him feel cozy, indoors or outdoors. The air smelled musty and damp because of the storm from last night. The dirt ground was damp from the rain.

He was approaching the center of Ponyville. He could heard a vast crowd of ponies from behind a building around the corner. However, just as he turned the corner and into the street, they were gone, making it look like a ghost town once again. Did they all have some kind of pony sense that alerted them whenever some non-pony comes near? It did not matter. Sense or no sense, they were just going to run from him anyway. He could just stand out in the open and proclaim that he was harmless, however, being the self-conscious mess he was, he did nothing.

He was about to continue walking when he heard a clunking and clanging sound coming from a kitchenware vendor. His eyes scanned it slowly, careful not to pass by an inch of it too quickly. A sudden shift in movement made his eyes turn quickly to a pile of pots and pans. He walked slowly toward it, and it moved again. What was that? Could it be a thief? If it was a thief, Connor would catch him and hand him over to the authorities. From them on, everypony would see that he was not a menace. He grinned, embracing his little daydream. The pile moved again. He licked his lips and started tiptoeing closer to it. He raised his arms up to his face level, reading his arms for snatching.

Suddenly, something crawled out, which startled the human. He whipped, punched, and chopped the air in front of him, before taking a closer look at the "thief". 

It was a small baby pony wearing a pan lid on its head. He rolled his eyes, insecure that he got himself scared by an infant. The baby pony playfully pounded its little hooves on the pot like it was a drum. Little coos and flatulent sounds escaped from its small, plump, drool-soaked lips.

Connor could not help but smile at the little tyke. The little scamp did not seem to have a care in the world and was easily entertained by everything. Then, the little baby pony stopped its little drum solo and noticed the tall human. Connor, acting as gently and friendly as he could, knelt to the baby’s eye level and waved. The baby’s face began to wrinkle and twist, like he was about to cry.

Oh, God! Please don’t cry! Please don’t cry! Please don’t, please don’t, please, please, please, please!! the human clenched his jaw.

A loud noise trumpeted from the baby’s small lungs and Connor flinched. It’s all over.

Wait…wait a second…

The baby was laughing! It was a big one, too. It's little belly shifted with each breath it made. It made the human smile like a moron.

Oh, the joy of a baby’s laugh! It made him chuckle himself.

Then, the baby rolled over onto its belly, planting its leg onto the ground before pushing itself off of the ground so it could start crawling to him. Its little forelegs made high-pitched clops as it crawled up to him. When it got to his sneakers, the baby reached up to him. He lost his balance because his hooves were not there to support the front of his body. The baby fell gently on top of Connor's right sneaker. It looked up to him, cooing happily before waving his sausage-like hoofs in the air, asking to be picked up. 

How could he refuse?

He bent over and gently wrapped his hands around the baby's tubby torso. He lifted him up to his side. The pony was as light as a beagle puppy. He looked around, glancing at the dark windows of the buildings and houses. Wherever the baby's mother was, he hoped she was watching. The baby grunted frustratedly, wanting the human's attention.

“Hey there, little guy! Havin’ fun with the pots? Acting like a drummer? Hmm?”

The baby pony giggled and made a happy flatulent noise with its chubby lips, spraying the human's face with saliva.

“Where’s your mother? She should be around here somewhere.”

Right on cue. He heard the sound of a pony tearing around inside a building. He also heard a panicked female voice.

The door slowly creaked open, and a frightened face of a mare with a baby blue mane poked out. Her head snapped left and right until she saw Connor holding her precious bundle. She gasped loudly and was darting over to Connor with an elated and relieved expression. The human felt a little spark of joy ignite in his soul. He finally had done it! He earned somepony’s friendship! He held the baby out in front of him toward the mother.

“My baby!” she exclaimed.

“Here you go, ma’am! I guess this is yours? A little word of advice, you should really keep--."

“Gimme!!” She snatched the little tyke right out of Connor’s hands and darted right back into the house.

…That was it?

No “thank you”?

No gratitude at all?

No token of appreciation?

Nothing?? 

Uh, you're welcome! You grabby, ungrateful... he thought glumly.

He slung his hands into his pockets and turned to trudge toward the library.


----------


Connor saw the library just ahead. It was literally a tree house. 

No, a house-tree.

Technically, the house’s exterior was a tree. It was like looking at a special apartment that belonged to some expensive, nature-themed resort. Also, it reminded him of those Keebler elves who made cookies in a tree.

We walked up to the door and gave it a knock. A few seconds later, Twilight opened the door.

"Hey, Twilight," the human smiled.

"Oh! Connor!" the unicorn replied. "What's going on?"

“I’m just gonna hang here for a while. You won’t mind, right?”

“Of course not! Come in! You came in at the right time.”

The human entered, scanning the interior. For a library, it was very roomy. The room was cylindrical and had a small stand in the exact middle. The shelves that held the many books looked like they were carved into the walls, making long, soft edged holes. The ceiling was towering high and adapting to the tree's movements of growth.

"WHOA! What the--?" the human yelped as he was involuntarily lifted into the air by the unicorn's magic. He was yanked through the air and placed roughly on a stool near the stand in the middle of the room. His head spun from the sudden force of Twilight's magic. He rubbed his rear, which had hurt from being dropped into the hard chair. A burst of white light exploded at the side of his eyes, startling him. After the white light, Twilight was in front of him, holding a scroll and quill with her magic. Her eyes were wide open and eager.

"Twilight, what--?"

"Don't talk, just answer the questions," she simply said, looking as excited as a child on Christmas morning. "Oh, this is so exciting! Life existing in the cosmos! Wow! Somehow, I knew it was possible! I have to admit, if you hadn't showed up, then I would have doubted it for good."

"Uhhhhh... You're welcome?"

"Now, tell me, what is your world like? Is it the same? Is it nearly the same? Is it different? Is it totally different?"

"It's... nearly similar."

"Care to explain in detail?"

"Um, well..."

"What kind of politics do you have? What religious beliefs? What races? Ethnics? Technology? Anything!"

"Well..."

"Also, after this, I have some questions about the details of your trip. Which I put you through, that is..."

"Uhh..."

"Does it hurt? Does it make you feel woozy? I am just so full of questions right now!" she smiled brightly.

“Hey!” called a familiar voice from upstairs. "What's up, Connor?"

“Hey, Spike! Nothing much at the moment. What about you?”

“Just hanging around in my room. I finished all of my chores today! It was a really short list.”

“Sweet! Mind if I join you?”

"Heck, yeah," the dragon grinned.

"Wait!" Twilight stopped the human from going upstairs. "What about--?"

"Come on, Twilight, give the guy a break," Spike said. "The last thing he needs is a one thousand question questionnaire."

"Spike, please. You're over-exaggerating," the unicorn said, unimpressed. "It's not going to take that long."

"Spike, it's okay," Connor said to the young dragon. "Just give me a moment. I'll try to not take too long."

The dragon sighed. "Suit yourself."

"Besides, I think you might want to hear this, too," he said as he tapped the floor with his foot, telling him to sit down.

The human shifted his rear in his seat, making himself a little more comfortable in his place. He turned back to Twilight.

"How about I tell you? Well, first off, my planet is like yours in lots of ways. Houses, shelter, necessities, business, politics, you name it. And, what's different, uhhh... Well, we are technologically a lot more advanced than you guys. I mean, a lot."

"How?"

Connor itched his thighs underneath his jeans, trying to think of something, until his hand touched a rectangular lump protruding from underneath his jeans.

"Hey!" he exclaimed as he reached in his pocket. "My iPhone! I completely forgot about this thing."

"An eye-what?" Spike tilted his head in utter confusion.

"An iPhone. It's a phone, only ten times better!"

"What's a phone?" Twilight asked.

Connor stared at them.

Wow... these guys are really behind!

"Well, a phone, also known as a 'telephone', is an invention made by a human named Alexander Graham Bell many years ago. It was used to communicate with people from far away."

"Ahhh! Like letters," the purple unicorn nodded.

"Only with telephones, its always instant and way more efficient than sending letters back and forth. That takes too long."

"It's faster?"

"Way faster. You could call anyone, er, anypony you like as long as he or she has a telephone."

"Oh," the unicorn said in disappointment. "I was going to ask you how it works, but I'm afraid that nopony has a... 'telephone'."

"I'll keep it simple: It's like talking to a pony face-to-face, only the pony you are talking to is not really there in front of you."

"Like having a conversation behind a wall?"

"Close, but the pony you are talking to is someplace else like in a different country or a different town."

"Really? Just like that? Talking to a pony who is physically there, but not present?" Twilight's asked with her eyebrows rising high on her forehead.

"That's pretty much it."

Spike excitedly nudged Twilight in the side. "You know, we could do that for sending in your friendship reports instead of sending scrolls."

"That sounds nice, but it wouldn't be the same," she replied.

"This particular phone, however," Connor resumed. "Does more than just make calls. It plays music, too. Pretty much the reason why this was invented. Jobs is a freaking genius!"

"Wait, it plays music, too??" Twilight gawked. "Well, I have to say, that's impressive! I didn't know that you could make vinyl record players that small! Wait... but, where's the needle?"

"Well... It doesn't really play vinyl records, per se, but it could play digitalized versions of records, which we will talk about later."

"Can you show us?" Spike asked, eager to see what would happen.

"Why the hell not?" the human smiled.

What a good feeling! People, well, living beings were actually interested in what he was doing! He would kill for this kind of attention back on his earth.

He pressed the black, glassy button and the screen flicked on. His fingered tapped and brushed over the screen, trying to pull up his music player.

"Is that light coming from that thing?" the young dragon gasped in awe.

"Well, yeah, I mean..."

Suddenly, the dragon was right next to him, looking at the bright, eerie glow. Connor could feel the dragon's jaw drop on top of his forearm.

"Whoa!" he gasped in awe. "What is that??"

"We call it a 'screen'," the human grinned pridefully.

"Holy guacamole! Look at that picture! It's--! WHOA! What happened?! It's gone! You touched it, and now it's gone!"

"This particular screen is called a 'touch-screen', which means you can touch wherever, and... it obeys your command."

"Twilight! Look at this! C'mere, c'mere! You gotta see this!" he said as he tugged the unicorn's hoof, hopping in his place like a kangaroo.

It was Twilight's turn to be amazed.

"Remarkable!" she gasped as she eyed the human's finger making contact with the screen.

"Smile," Connor said quickly.

"Wha--?"

POOF! A bright, white light flashed in Twilight's face.

"There!" the human smiled. "I just took your picture."

Spike took the iPhone from him and planted his snout against the screen, looking closely at the photo.

"Bwahahahahaaaaa! Look at you, Twilight! You're just so-- BAH-hahahahahaaaa!!" the young dragon guffawed.

"Wha--? Who--? I duh..." she slurred as she shook the dizziness that resulted from the iPhone's bright light. When her vision cleared, she could see a face glowing from the screen. A rather half-stoned, half-mentally stupid purple face with its lower jaw protruding from the face, showing a slack jaw. The face's eyes were half open like they were just waking up from a long sleep.

Soon, the human and the dragon were rolling on the floor, laughing uncontrollably while Twilight's wandering mind was trying to wrap itself around what the heck just happened.

"S-stop it! That's not funny! I--! You--! You caught me off-guard, that's all! Stop laughing right now!"

The human took a huge breath of air after losing so much of it because of the laughing. "Yeah, it has a camera, too."

"Yes, I can see that now. Very... impressive. Now, you were going to show us how it plays music?"

"Okay, okay," he said, still snickering. "Do you guys like metal?

Spike immediately stopped laughing. “What’s metal?”

“Wait, Y…” Connor looked at him. “You don’t know what metal is?”

“Nope!”

“What about you, Twilight?"

“I haven’t,” she replied.

"Well, you ought to at least heard of metal, right?"

The only answer the human got was a stupidly clueless look from both of them.

“…Hard rock?” he asked.

“Oh, I’ve heard of rock!" Spike shot his claw into the air. "I’ve heard of that, but 'hard rock' I've never heard of.”

Connor stared at the two being sitting in front of him. So they had never heard of metal at all... What a world...

Wait, he said to himself that he was willing to enlighten people who had never heard of metal. This was his chance.

“Well, guys, I think it’s time for a little enlightenment!”

“Okay?” Twilight said awkwardly.

“You've both heard of rock, so let’s start with ‘hard rock’. ‘Hard rock’ is…how should I put this simply? Hard rock sounds rougher than normal rock. The electrifying sound of it just makes you want to shout from the top of your lungs and from the bottom of your throat. The guitar sounds a like it has more of a buffeting punch into it. It’s enough to get you all wound up and feel like a warrior."

“Interesting,” the purple unicorn hummed, stroking her chin with her hoof.

Connor scrolled through his music library until he came across what he wanted. "Here. I'm only going to play you guys a sample of hard rock. This is from a band called, 'AC/DC', and they are the best examples of hard rock."

"Very well," Twilight nodded in consent.

The human tapped "Thunderstruck" with his thumb, and it played through the speakers. The two non-humans both flinched just when they heard the loud sound emerge from the tiny device. As the song was playing, they stared at the iPhone with their mouths agape, not believing what their ears were hearing. Connor pressed "pause".

"So? What do you think?" he asked.

“Whoa...” Spike said. "That is amazing! I never knew you guys were so advanced like that! Plus, the song sounded neat."

"Remarkable!" Twilight exclaimed with her mouth agape. "Yes, the song was interesting."

“Next comes ‘metal'," Connor continued his 'lesson'. "It sounds heavier than hard rock. Maybe a little tougher. The guitar sounds like it has more of a gut to it. It sounds bad, tough, unrelenting, and yet all so musical. It really gets your head moving, which is where ‘head banging’ comes in.”

He played Metallica’s “Enter Sandman.” Likewise, he stopped halfway.

“Eh? You guys like?”

“I like! For sure!” Spike said. "Sounds cool!"

Twilight said nothing, but nodded in thought.

Connor was scrolling to the next song. “Now, we walk into ‘heavy metal’. It sounds much heavier than metal. The guitar has more tendency to make noise a little more than music. In my opinion, it adds more of a beat to it. The singer tends to focus more on volume more than voice. Sometimes you can’t have both of them, but if you practice a lot, then it is possible. The drums sound a little faster. Now, listen.”

He played Judas Priest’s “Painkiller”, stopped halfway, and waited for approval.

“Sounds pretty loud,” Spike raised an eyebrow.

Twilight's expression became less interested as well as uncomfortable. What's next? she thought. It gets even louder?

“And finally, we stop at ‘death metal’," the human said, acting rather scholarly. “Now death metal is all out on the noise, but twice on the epicness. Most people see death metal as just noise, all out of sync, a pain to listen to. I have to admit, though, some death metal really is just noise. That is why I only listen to the good ones. I get really picky when it comes to death metal. I like for it to sound somewhat musical, yet still provide the epic, electrifying aura of awesomeness.  Plus, I see death metal bands as the ones who are the most instrumentally talented in a world full of digitalized music, lazy computer enhanced vocals, and rap. The singer sings in a tiger-like growl, the drums are at full speed, and the guitar sounds like thunder, striking incessantly.”

Spike shifted in his seat, feeling an excited tingle rush down his spine scales.

“BUT," Connor said. "I wish there were amplifiers around here. It sounds much better that way.”

“Oh!” Spike pointed to the closet. “There’s one in there!”

“Really? Oh man, that’s sweet! Why’d you have one in the first place?”

He opened the doors to the closet and found an electric guitar lying against the amplifier.

“That,” Spike answered. “But (heh!) that was never meant to last, though. I tried to write a song for Rarity, I had Twilight listen to it, and then she said for me to never play guitar again. I guess it did sound pretty awful."

"Pretty awful??" Twilight eyed him.

"Okay, okay! So, it sounded really awful! Geez, Twilight, thanks for making me feel better about myself. But yeah, I’d rather stick to the piano. I sound better that way.” 

Spike flinched. Did he just say he was writing a song for Rarity? Even though Connor already knew, Spike was afraid that he spilled the beans about his feelings for Rarity.

“Um, I mean I was writing a song for…uh… Oh, forget it. Connor… since I trust you enough that you could keep a secret, I need to tell you a secret.”

“Oh? What is it?” he asked, stifling a rude snicker.

The dragon pointed a firm claw at Twilight. "And you, too! Got it?"

"Spike, I already..." She was cut off by the dragon's piercing glare. Rolling her eyes, she sighed, "My lips are sealed."

He wagged a claw for them to draw closer to him. He was satisfied with the distance between them. He wagged his claw again, telling them to come even closer. He was still not satisfied. Closer...

"I have a crush on Rarity," he spoke softly.

Connor nearly burst out laughing at how ridiculous he was acting. How ironic how he already knew the dragon's dark secret... Still, he kept his poker face, so he would not hurt the little lover boy’s feelings.

“No wayyyyy! Rarity??" the human gasped.

“Please don’t tell anyone! I’ve been keeping it a secret…ever since Twilight spilled the beans about it," he said, shooting a glare at his adoptive sister.

“Your secret's safe with me," the human said, raising a hand up to his face level.

“Pinkie Pie Promise?”

“What?”

“’Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye’?”

Connor reiterated the promise. That sealed the deal.

“Cool!” Spike smiled. “Now continue to your ‘death metal’, please!”

“Right!”

He dragged the amplifier out and plugged it in. He found other end of the input cord. Hopefully it would fit in Connor’s iPhone. Well, by Jove, it did! It was a big surprise that it did.

“And now, Spike and Twilight,” Connor puffed his chest out in prideful fashion. “Experience death metal in full, high quality sound! Here is Cannibal Corpse’s ‘Hammer Smashed Face’!” 

He hit the play button…

BAM! BAM! BAM! BADA-BAM! BAM! BAM! BADA-BAM! BAM! BAM! BAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAMBAM!

The wall of the wind coming from the speakers literally blew them back against the wall. Their cheeks were flapping furiously, revealing their teeth, plain as day. Connor was right next to speaker out of the way of the blast. He was playing his air guitar, head banging happily, not realizing the turmoil the other two were in.

"Connor!" Twilight shouted through the blast. "It's too loud! Stop the music!"

He could not hear them. The amplifier continued to hurl a merciless pillar of deep, raw growling and distorted electric guitar strumming at the two non-humans. The purple unicorn tried to scream, but the wind clogged her throat, nearly choking her. She had had enough. Fighting the huge distraction that was beating against her face, she concentrated her magic on the power cord. When she sensed that she got a hold of it, she telekinetically yanked the cord out of the socket, shutting the amplifier off. The pillar of musical force stopped and the two slid down the wall like uncooked eggs that had been thrown at the wall.

“Aw man!” Connor whined. “Come oooonnnn! That was the best part!”

Spike slowly stood up like a zombie rising from the grave. His scales were ruffled, and his eyes were wide open. Twilight rose as well, looking as haggard as an overworking soccer mom. Her mane was severely ruffled and tousled.

“That…was…AWESOME!” the young dragon screamed.

Twilight, however, was on the brink of hysteria.

“What in Celestia’s name was THAT?!”

“Death metal!” Connor beamed.

"That noise?!"

"Well, I did say that it may sound like noise as a precaution..."

Twilight was on the brink of screaming again, until she forceful calmed herself. She took a deep breath as she tried to fix her mane. “I have to say, that was very interesting, but I also have to say, I’m not very enthusiastic about it. I just don’t see myself listening to it.”

"Awww... Twilight!" he cooed sympathetically, but then he shrugged. “Well, like they always say, ‘It’s not for everyone.’”

“It's not. Now, please…PLEASE,” Twilight emphasized. “If you are going to play that 'death metal' thing again, do not play it that loud again.”

He rolled his eyes. Another lightweight... Glorious. However, if he was going to stay here, he would might as well try his best to cope with it.

"Okay, Twilight," he said.

"Good! Okay, tell me more about your world."

The human took a deep breath.

"Okay, here goes... It may not sound absolutely one-hundred percent accurate, but I'll do my best to make it that way."

"It's fine. Just tell me what you know," the unicorn nodded, being considerate. She lifted her scroll and quill with her magic.

"Here goes..."

Hours flew by like minutes as the human spoke about many things. Even though he said earlier that his world was much like the world he was in now, there were so many things that Twilight and Spike had never heard of. He talked about cars, trucks, phones, televisions, computers, the internet, music, planes, trains, the economy, currency, what kind of food humans eat, the government, countries; he talked about everything he could think of. However, he did not want to ramble on too much on each category. Instead, he only stated the most basic things he could think of. Well, that was based on his definition of "basic".

"Annnd... that's pretty much it as far as I know," the human concluded.	

"Really? That's it?"

"I guess so."

"Wow! There's just so much I have never even heard of before! This is amazing! Out of this world... literally!"

"I'm glad," he smiled, feeling tired from all the talking he just did.

"I just filled up six pages of information! I have to say, this is unlike any other research I've come across. Wait until Princess Celestia hears about this! Which reminds me, Spike I may need your help helping me send all of this to the Princess."

“Okay!” The dragon replied, hopping off of his seat. His rump cringed in stiffness from sitting down for so long. “I’ll be right back, Connor.”

Twilight and Spike descended the stairs and walked up to the desk near a large pane window. She wrapped all the sheets into one scroll and fastened it with a red ribbon. The ribbon had a golden badge with an image of a horseshoe on it. Spike grabbed the scroll and held it in front of his face. He inhaled deeply. When he exhaled, green fire shot from his puckering lips, engulfing the scroll. As the scroll burned, it dissipated into a magical cloud of ash and flew out the window like a guided missile.

“There, now my research project is sent! Thank you, Spike!”

“No problem! Just doing do I do best.” He walked back up the stairs. Twilight pulled out a book from the shelf and sat in her comfy chair to read.

Just outside her window, three dark figures peeked in. They were cloaked in blood-red cloaks with golden flourishes and ominous hoods. There was an image on upside-down crown imprinted on the backs of the cloaks and areas near their flanks.
They peered in through the window for a little longer, and then turned to each other, nodding.

“Tell Lord Hellfire that we have our leverage to Celestia,” one of the ponies spoke.

"Right," they all said in unison.

To be continued…