//------------------------------// // TrixieIsMostMagicalPony // Story: A Troll In Equestria // by Duke of Canterlot //------------------------------// Princess Twilight Sparkle loved the Internet. It was essentially a bottomless pit of knowledge. If it wasn't for her lovely friends, Twilight would be on the Internet 24/7. Additionally Princess Celestia invented the Internet herself, which only added to how amazing it was. Twilight loved almost everything about the Internet, she was admittedly a tad disgusted with the porn which was commonplace. In fact, Twilight researched the matter and realized that any website could increase its traffic threefold if it added pornographic images. However, the Internet was certainly more than porn. One of Twilight's favorite forums was "Magic Scholars". It was about anything and everything to do with magic. Twilight found herself to simultaneously be a teacher and student at the forum. Even though few ponies knew even close to as much as she knew, Twilight was able to gain some new insights on her own spells. Ah, the Internet, she loved it so much. Once you were able to ignore the filth, the Internet could be used entirely for good. Twilight looked through the forum for new and exciting topics. Twilight saw "How can I clean more efficiently with magic?", "Can an earth pony create magic?", "Trixie is the most magical pony", "Princess Celestia Fan Club". Twilight grimaced at the "Trixie is the most magical pony", who would seriously think such a thing? Twilight decided to click on the link. Twilight rolled her eyes at the username of the poster - TrixieIsMostMagicalPony. "Hey guys! I went to a magic show recently in Fillydelphia and I saw the most magical pony ever. She called herself the Great and Powerful Trixie, so I knew that meant she was good. I asked Trixie if she was the most magical pony ever and she said yes. I asked her if she was better than Princess Twilight Sparkle, she told me yes. This impressed me to no end. So, then I asked Trixie if she was better than Princess Luna, she told me yes. I was like HOLY SHIT OMG THIS PONY IS DA BEST, so then I asked her if she was better than Princess Celestia. I eagerly awaited Trixie's answer as she took a moment to pause. She must have thought my question was extra deep and smart... and then Trixie looked at me and told me yes. Then I knew right there that the Great and Powerful Trixie is the best and most magical pony ever lol... I have the proof. I used to think that the princesses were most magical but Trixie told me otherwise, so it must be true. LOL" Twilight groaned to herself, how could anypony be so goddamn stupid? TrixieIsMostMagicalPony didn't even present any proof that Trixie showed she was more magical than Princess Celestia. Twilight thought to herself, this is just a troll, leave it alone. Twilight began looking at other topics on the forum but she couldn't stop thinking about how somepony out there actually would think Trixie was more magical than Celestia, Luna, or herself. Twilight was honestly not too bothered that someone was spouting that Trixie was better than her or Luna, even without real evidence. However, being so disgraceful to Celestia was unacceptable... Twilight had to do something. She decided to respond to TrixieisMostMagicalPony using her username Magic. "TrixieIsMostMagicalPony, what sort of evidence do you have Trixie is more magical than Princess Celestia? What tricks did she show you? At this point, the only proof you present to the forum is that Trixie told you that she was more magical than Princess Celestia. If you know Celestia half as well as I do, you would know how powerful our Princess truly is. I have had the pleasure to know both Celestia and Trixie. Trixie is an above-average unicorn when it comes to magic but she is no where near as great or powerful as Celestia" TrixieIsMostMagicalPony responded. "LOL YOU KNOW CELESTIA! So do I, lol. I think she's a lame-o compared to Trixie. I mean if Celestia was as great and powerful as Trixie, she would call herself the Great and Powerful Celestia, right? Also, I was up at Canterlot and I asked Celestia if she was more powerful than Trixie. Celestia told me no. So, there you have it, Trixie tells me that she is more powerful than Celestia and Celestia told me she is not as powerful as Trixie." Twilight was furious, who does this bitch think she is? Twilight heard a knock on the door. She then heard a soft "Sorry for disturbing you but I could use your help..." It must be Fluttershy. Spike rushed downstairs to open the door. "Come on in!", said Twilight from her computer. "It seems like Fluttershy needs help. That internet can wait", said Spike. "Somepony dares defy Princess Celestia, this is important!" "Who cares? It's not like anypony takes anything on the internet seriously?" Spike opened the door to see Fluttershy. She was looking down at the ground. "Hey Fluttershy" "Oh hey, Spike. I guess I could come back later if Twilight is busy." "No, that won't be necessary. Hey, Twilight, Fluttershy needs your help!!" Twilight got off her computer and walked over to Fluttershy and Spike. "Fluttershy, what's the problem?" "Oh Twilight, I was hoping you could help me with something computer-related." "I will do what I can." "Tonight, I was on the animal lovers forum like I normally do. However, there was this pony who was saying he or she was going to feed a parakeet arsenic to watch it cough and twitch like the parakeet in the PonyTube video. While that is bad in itself, arsenic would kill the parakeet instantly. The pony even named the parakeet Celestia." "Hmmm.. there seems to be an attitude of defiance towards Celestia across many different niches of the Internet. Someponies are really horrible. I was just trying to deal with a pony who claimed that Trixie was more skilled at magic than Princess Celstia. Just the thought makes me so angry!" "Ummm.. Twilight.. ummm... that doesn't seem so bad." "What do you mean that doesn't seem so bad?" "I mean, a pony has the right to believe that Trixie is better at magic than Celestia, even if other ponies think the contrary." "But you should have seen why the pony believes Trixie is more magical. He or she claims this because Trixie said that she was more magical than Princess Celestia. The nerve of a pony to believe that.. I would say it was Trixie herself writing the post but she would actually show a demonstration of her own magic instead of simply saying "Trixie says she is more powerful than Celestia, therefore, it is true."." "I see you have a lot on your mind. I could track this potential murderer myself..." "No, it's okay. So, you said that there is somepony out there who is going to feed a bird arsenic. I can track the IP address of the original post and determine where that pony was saying such things. It might assist us in determining the identity of the poster too and if we act quickly.. we can save the parakeet before it is too late." "Yes, please do. Also, sorry to get off topic, but um.. how is the flying going?" "It's going okay. I think I am somewhere between Rainbow Dash and you when it comes to flying." "Oh, how nice to hear. I am an awful flier though, so um.." "Ugh.. Fluttershy.. you are not an awful flier. I shouldn't have said that, so rude of me." "It's okay. I am so happy to have you as my friend." "Me too." Twilight sighed with relief. She often made mistakes like that socially, saying what she knows is true without regard for her friends' feelings. At least, Fluttershy was a good sport. Twilight went to her computer to "Animal Lovers". She found the original poster AnimalsAreSoooooCute, hmmmm.. this shouldn't be too hard. Twilight was able to determine the IP address of the perpetrator... hmmm.. let's see where AnimalsAreSooooCute was tonight... "I hope we can save Celestia", Fluttershy whispered to Spike. "Huh, oh..Parakeet Celestia." "Yes, Twilight is so awesome and smart though. She will save that poor bird from death, assuming she can find the answer quickly enough." "I hope so, for your sake." Twilight gasped. She was shocked to see where the poster was located: Princess Celestia's castle in Canterlot.