"Pinkie? Can I come in?" came Fluttershy's muffled voice from outside the room. Pinkie quickly finished writing in the journal and wiped her tears. She threw the journal onto the small bedside table. She took a deep breath and smiled as best she could while she said, "Yeah, come on in, Fluttershy."
Fluttershy walked into the room with a concerned look on her face. "Pinkie...are you feeling alright?" Pinkie Pie's smile faltered for a second, so quickly that Fluttershy almost couldn't see it. Almost.
"Y-yeah, I'm okay...why wouldn't I be?" asked Pinkie, but she soon looked away from Fluttershy to out the window. It was pouring rain outside. She then picked up a tray of muffins from the bedside table and held it out to Fluttershy. "Do you want a muffin?" she asked. Fluttershy shook her head no, and Pinkie put the tray back. Fluttershy stayed silent for a minute, then took a deep breath and spoke.
"Pinkie...I know that you've been crying a lot. And, I know that it's not from your wound. Please talk to me Pinkie. If that's alright with you, I mean..." said Fluttershy, putting a hoof on Pinkie's shoulder. Pinkie's smile disappeared completely, and she looked at Fluttershy with sad eyes.
"...okay..." she responded. Pinkie proceeded to tell Fluttershy about everything that happened on that day, from her nervousness in the morning to her passing out from blood loss. Fluttershy listened intently, trying as hard as she could to understand.
"Pinkie, that doesn't sound like Rainbow Dash. She wouldn't be disgusted with you, and she surely wouldn't hate you...are you sure that's what she meant?" asked Fluttershy.
"N-no..." she said quietly.
~What are you talking about? Of course that's what she meant!
"I-i mean...yes, yes it is..." corrected Pinkie, automatically agreeing with the voice inside. Fluttershy had a confused look on her face, but stayed silent for a moment. Finally, she spoke up.
"Pinkie...I think that you might be misunderstanding this whole thing..." she suggested.
~Misunderstanding...I get it. She's calling you stupid! Are you just going to take that? Come on! Pinkie's eyes narrowed.
"Misunderstanding? No, no I'm not! I'm not stupid, Fluttershy! I know that you and just about everypony in Ponyville think that I'm just a little moron, but I'm not! So, do me a favor, and SHUT YOUR STUPID SNOUT!" she snarled. Then, as she realized what she said, her eyes widened and she covered her mouth with a hoof.
"F-fluttershy, I'm so sorry! I-I don't know what came over me..." apologized Pinkie. She expected Fluttershy to leave the room, tell her she had to go run some errands, something like that. She didn't expect Fluttershy to pull her into a tight hug.
"It's okay, Pinkie, it's okay..." said Fluttershy as she hugged Pinkie Pie, who began sobbing into Fluttershy's mane. "We all say things that we don't mean when we're angry...don't worry about it," reassured Fluttershy as Pinkie cried silently in her mane. "Pinkie, I'm sure that you just misunderstood what happened. I'm not saying that you're stupid, okay? How about this. I'm going to go and have a talk with Rainbow Dash about all of this to try and find out what happened. Okay?" asked Fluttershy, still hugging Pinkie. Pinkie sniffled and said, "Okay..." quietly. Fluttershy patted Pinkie on the back once more, then pulled away from the hug. "I'll be back soon," said Fluttershy as she walked out of the room.
~I can't believe you. This is one of the worst things that could've happened. Now, even Fluttershy thinks you're weak! FLUTTERSHY! scolded the voice inside.
-No...that's a lie... replied Pinkie.
~You and I both know that I'm right, sneered the voice inside. Pinkie clutched her head. The voice inside never insulted her before, and it was never able to force Pinkie's actions or emotions. Pinkie knew that it was getting worse. She just hoped that this would all be over before the voice made her do something she would regret. Her thoughts were interrupted by knocks coming from the front door. She heard the soft clopping of Fluttershy's hooves as she answered the door. There was light conversation that Pinkie couldn't quite make out, but she soon heard the hoofsteps coming up the stairs.
"Um, Pinkie?" came Fluttershy's voice. "There's somepony here to see you," she said. "Okay, Fluttershy," replied Pinkie, wondering who it would be. Her eyes widened as she saw the visitor.
A very wet and ashamed Rainbow Dash slowly trotted into the room, leaving small puddles of water where she stood. "H-hey, Pinkie," said Rainbow Dash, trying for a smile but failing. There were a couple of moments of awkward silence. Then, Rainbow Dash heard Pinkie's voice.
"...why are you here?" she asked quietly. Rainbow Dash looked at Pinkie and sighed. "Well...I came to apologize, Pinkie. I...I shouldn't have looked at you that way after...what happened. I should've tried to explain myself after it happened instead of staring at you like an idiot. And...I'm sorry," said Rainbow Dash.
"...why haven't you come to visit me? I'm one of your best friends, aren't I? You've just been ignoring me, avoiding me, haven't you?" asked Pinkie.
"I've...I've just been really caught up at work, Pinkie. There's a huge storm cloud formation moving in from the west, and I've been out for the past couple of days clearing the really bad clouds like there's no tomorrow. You see, if we let those clouds come in, it could really damage..." Rainbow Dash kept talking, but her voice was drowned out by the voice inside.
~Tell her to tell it to somepony who cares.
"Why don't you tell it to somepony who cares, Rainbow Dash? All I know is that you're using work as an excuse to avoid me," interrupted Pinkie. Rainbow Dash's eyes widened at the remark, and Pinkie immediately looked sorry. "I-I'm sorry, Dashie, I..."
~Don't apologize! Pinkie immediately stayed quiet.
"It's okay, Pinkie. I deserve it. I've been a terrible friend lately," said Rainbow Dash. "But, that's not the only reason that I haven't come to see you. I've been trying to build up my courage. I had no idea how you would react when you saw me after what happened," admitted Rainbow Dash.
"To tell you the truth, I didn't have any idea either..." responded Pinkie quietly.
"But...Pinkie. Please tell me something. I just have to know. Why..." Rainbow Dash sighed. "This is going to be a stupid question..."
"Oh, then it should fit you completely," said Pinkie before she could stop herself. Rainbow Dash winced, but continued.
" I deserved that...But, Pinkie...why...why did you k-kiss me?" asked Rainbow Dash. Pinkie gritted her teeth.
"I-I...I can't tell you that..." she said.
~Good...you've finally made a good decision...
"Wh-why not?" asked Rainbow Dash.
"Because you would be disgusted...and you would hate me forever..." replied Pinkie.
"Wh-what? I would never hate you forever, Pinkie!" replied Rainbow Dash.
"You say that now, but what about later?!" demanded Pinkie hotly.
"Well, we'll never find out if you don't tell me why!" retorted Rainbow Dash.
"I can't!"
"Why not?! Just tell me!" ordered Rainbow Dash. "Why did you kiss me?!"
"BECAUSE I LOVE YOU!" yelled Pinkie at the top of her lungs. "I love you! I...I love you so much, Rainbow Dash...I..."
~Oh, you just cannot resist ruining your own life. Well, you can't run now, Pinkie. You have to make HER run. Tell her how much you hate her.
"B-but...I don't hate her..." responded Pinkie out loud.
~DO IT.
"But...I hate you now...I hate you so much, Rainbow Dash! Why did I have to fall in love with you?! WHY?!" screamed Pinkie. "No...no I don't...Don't listen to me...Gr, you ripped my heart in half and burned the shreds on that day when you looked at me like that! No, no you didn't! You didn't..." Pinkie clutched her head and sobbed.
"P-pinkie? What's going on?" asked Rainbow Dash in complete bewilderment. Pinkie opened her eyes slightly and looked directly at Rainbow Dash.
"Get out..." she growled.
"Wh-what?" asked Rainbow Dash.
"Get out...get out. Get out. Get out! Get out get out GET OUT!" yelled Pinkie as she threw the tray of muffins at Rainbow Dash. The tray hit her directly in the face, and as she turned around, she slipped in one of the small puddles of water. She took one last, terrified look at Pinkie Pie before she picked herself up and ran outside of the cottage. Pinkie Pie's chest heaved as she watched Rainbow Dash take flight, hearing Fluttershy's faint yells.
"Rainbow Dash?! Where are you going?!" she heard. Then, she immediately calmed down, and looked at her hooves. She then looked at the muffins scattered all over the floor, and she caught one last glimpse of Rainbow Dash before she flew out of view of the window.
~Wh-what just happened...she won't hurt you anymore...so why are you more depressed than you were before? Why are you still crying? I don't understand... said the voice inside. Pinkie grabbed her head and curled up into a ball on the bed. She whimpered as she sobbed, and she began to hear Fluttershy's hoofsteps coming from downstairs. Fluttershy rushed into the room, a look of worry on her face.
"Pinkie Pie, what happened?!" she demanded. Pinkie had never seen Fluttershy like this before, and it scared her somewhat.
"Fluttershy..." said Pinkie quietly, Fluttershy moved closer to her.
"What is it, Pinkie?" she asked worriedly.
"I...I think I'm going crazy, Flutters..." replied Pinkie, looking straight ahead. "I...I hear a voice in my head...it...it tells me how everything can go wrong...tells me that I shouldn't try to do anything...because I'll just fail in the end...but now...she won't be quiet...she won't stop insulting me...she won't stop making me do these things...She can make me get angry, and she can make me do things...I...I'm insane, Fluttershy" whimpered Pinkie as she moved her gaze to meet Fluttershy's. Fluttershy saw that tears were freely flowing down Pinkie's face.
"Pinkie...you're not crazy..." said Fluttershy. Pinkie opened her mouth to say something, but Fluttershy shushed her. "Pinkie, let me finish. You're not crazy. Everypony has something like that. They're always thinking about what can go wrong...worrying about how they'll never succeed...some of them hear other voices that tell them that, some of them just think it on their own...but, you can't think like that, Pinkie! You have to shut her out..." said Fluttershy.
"But...it's so hard...I don't think I can..." replied Pinkie.
~Don't even try...you know that you'll just fail.
"Pinkie, don't think like that," said Fluttershy. "Come on, stop focusing on things like that. Think about how you can make things better with Rainbow Dash, Pinkie. But, do that later. Right now, you should get some sleep. You agitated your wound during that...argument," said Fluttershy pointing a hoof at Pinkie's side. Pinkie winced as she saw the fresh blood staining the bandages, and Fluttershy pulled a first aid kit out from under the bed. She quickly changed Pinkie Pie's bandages and then gave her a quick hug. "Get some rest. It'll help you figure out what to do..." she said before leaving. Pinkie nodded as Fluttershy left, then set her head down on the pillow. She tried to think about how she could fix this, but her drowsiness decided against it. Her eyes shut as she drifted off into not-so-peaceful slumber.
Oh, look at that, quality has gone down significantly. Sorry about a horrible chapter, but I really wanted to get this out so that I could finish some homework. I was originally going to have this chapter and the next one be just one huge chapter, but I realized that it's not going to work out that way, mainly because I want to keep main chapter lengths steady. So, yeah, I think that I've made the voice inside just a LITTLE too powerful, but it keeps the story moving, so yeah. Again, sorry about a horrible chapter. Hope you enjoyed reading it(don't see why you would; again, sorry about the horrible chapter) and I'll have the next(most likely better) one up soon. Hopefully.