Chapter 3 – Blood is Thinner
[…] The Hearth's Warming Eve pageant is also particularly inaccurate. For one, while the earth ponies did have a “chancellor,” this is not quite the correct translation. “Lord,” “Vassal,” or perhaps even “Daimyo” Puddinghead was one of multiple earth ponies in charge of oversight of the earth pony farms. She did not “rule” the earth ponies, nor did “General” Hurricane rule the pegasi. Rather, all were servants to the Royal Crown of the unicorn tribe. The last major error which should be addressed is the case of Princess Platinum. Multiple sources suggest that her father, King Ironcoat, had already been dead several years before the Windigo Convention which would eventually lead to the Pony Exodus. Therefore, the term “daughter to the king” used in the play either uses this in the past tense or is a misunderstanding of the relationship between herself and the regent at the time, Noble Blood. Princess Platinum was approximately 13 at the time, not quite ready to assume the throne.
~Modern Equestria, volume 1, Pre-Equestria and the Foundation of Canterlot
Prinzina led Pinkie up right past the gates. The two guards simply stared at them without so much as a reaction. Pinkie was awestruck at the beauty of the great castle. It wasn't like Canterlot Castle, but it really wasn't like the Crystal Empire one, either. It was a sweeping, detailed place; when Pinkie tried to follow some of the loops and swirls with her eyes, they'd lead her on seemingly infinite paths. She could also see that, unlike Canterlot Castle's ivory austerity, there'd been no expense saved on this castle. Every wall and fixture was either gold, silver, or gem-encrusted, and the tapestries and carpets throughout were nothing short of beautiful. But it made Pinkie think of who had made all of it, who had mined all the gems and woven all the tapestries. And unlike Canterlot Castle or the Crystal Empire, the whole place felt cold and lifeless. She didn't see any pegasus servants sweeping up in the alcoves or earth pony politicians bustling by with a clipboard full of notes. What unicorns were about simply stood by in their gaudy-colored robes and watched the two of them walk by. She hadn't heard anypony speak, neither modern Equestrian nor the strange speech Prinzina used. She still wasn't sure where she was.
They made their way to the throne room, where a stern, brown-coated stallion sat in thought. When he saw Prinzina enter, his eyes opened wide, and he motioned Prinzina forward. During the commotion, a fourth pony in a blue-and-gold robe appeared from behind one of the columns. At first, he talked to Prinzina, but he soon turned his attention to Pinkie and asked what seemed to be a question. She gestured to Pinkie, and she, taking this as her cue, headed up to join the little crowd. Prinzina told the blue-robed pony something along the lines of, "O Stelmoto, des ze Pinki. Sci halpet ihn bakturn tu der kastiler."
"Hello!" She tried to recall what Prinzina had said before. "Iya... ze Pinkie Pie?"
Prinzina laughed. She told the other two, "Sci ne kennet Unikornesh," and they nodded.
Pinkie felt awfully left out of the conversation. She tried signalling to her mouth and saying, "Can you help me? I don't understand at all!"
The brown stallion seemed uncertain. "O Arginasa, sci ze urteka. Warm ze yoan firenden sci?"
"Pitta! Yos musse halp scin zamwa!" Prinzina cried out. She clung to the blue-robed ponies hooves and seemed to asking for something important by her sad face.
He looked uncertain, then finally acquiesced. "Ata, O Prinzina. Ih totrate." He turned to Pinkie and motioned to her. "O yos. Komi hire."
"Come here? Okay." Pinkie did as he asked. He began to charge a spell, and Pinkie braced as the effect passed through her. It was incredibly disorienting, and Pinkie could hardly keep her mind straight. At last, when the effect seemed to recede, she opened her eyes again. Everything now seemed... familiar, in a way she couldn't quite place. Not deja vu, not Pinkie Sense, just... familiar, somehow. She tried to speak, and it almost sounded like she was saying two things at the same time. "Did it... did it work?"
The three of them cheered. "It did work! We can understand you! Can you understand us?"
"Yeah, I totally can! You know what this calls for? A party!" Unfortunately, she realized she had left her party cannon back in her own time.
"Is it more common in the future for ponies to have parties?" the brown pony commented.
"Only party ponies like me, Mr. Guy!" Pinkie replied.
"Pinkie, you can't talk to him like that!" Prinzina told him. "This is my stepfather, Regent Noble Blood. He rules over all of Unicornia in my stead, and he deserves your respect!"
"I didn't vote for him..." Pinkie mumbled to herself. "Anyway, how did you know I was from the future?"
"A very long story, I'm afraid," said the blue-robed pony. "My name is Starswirl. I'm the regent's alchemist and magician. You're welcome, by the way."
"Oh, Starswirl the Bearded? My friend's a big fan of your future work."
"I don't want to know more than that, Miss Pinkie! What if it could change the future?" Suddenly, he got a wicked gleam in his eyes. "But then I could learn so much more about the effects of future knowledge upon the timeline. But perhaps it could destroy the entire space-time continuum... or perhaps that's an acceptable risk."
"In any case..." Noble Blood gave a large smile, though it didn't go past his eyes. "We thank you graciously for bringing Princess Platinum back, but--"
"Who? Oh, Prinzina. Or... Platinum. Right."
"As I was saying, We're very grateful that you've brought our princess back to us, but now it's time for you to leave."
"Leave?" cried both Platinum and Starswirl. "She just got here!"
"I could learn so much more about the future!" said Starswirl.
"And she's really nice and friendly. Can't she stay just a little longer?"
"But she's an--! Urg, fine. Pinkie, you will stay with Platinum for as long as you wish."
"I'll need to go back home eventually," Pinkie said.
"And you shall," said Starswirl. "I can use the same spell to send you to the future as I did Platinum. It'll be easy. And you deserve it for helping bring back the princess."
"Thank you, all of you," Pinkie replied. See, Twilight, she thought, it was simple. Now all I have to do is find the Child and I can head back.
“Now, if you'll excuse us, Miss Pie, the princess has some lessons to get to. She has quite a lot of catching up to do, now that she's two weeks behind,” said Noble Blood. Platinum blushed and looked away as he pushed her out the door, leaving Pinkie and Starswirl alone in the big chamber.
“If anypony would be perfect for the job of teaching Platinum, I'd think it'd be you, Mr. Swirly!” said Pinkie.
“I would, of course, but I'm a bit busy with other projects at the moment. Besides, she's doing history today, and I've never been much for that.”
“But this is history! At least for me, anyway,” Pinkie replied.
“So you've learned about me, then, I take it?” Starswirl asked.
“Well, my friend Twilight has. She's really smart. Most of what I know comes from this play we do every year. 'The pegasi were stewards of the weather, the food could only be grown by the Earth ponies, and the unicorns magically brought forth day and night. And so mistrust between the tribes festered.' Wait, what does 'festered' mean, anyway?”
“To grow rotten and weak,” Starswirl said with a sigh. “It's true. You remember what Noble Blood said, right? 'But she is an earth pony. Why is she your friend?'”
“Actually, I didn't catch that part, but I believe you. What's his problem, anyway?”
“There's a lot behind it. If you asked him, he'd say that he's only naturally cautious around earth ponies since they led rebellion four years ago. But the truth is, he's a unicorn, and most unicorns think that earth ponies are worthless, save for their effectiveness as slave labor,” he said. He scowled and shook his head.
Pinkie looked deep into his eyes. “But you don't, do you, Starswirl?”
“No, I don't.” He laughed without any humor in his voice. “I've met earth ponies. I've met pegasi. They're not better or worse than any of us, just... different. They have their talents, and we have ours. We unicorns may be smart and be able to use magic, but that tends to make us a bit... isolated. I mean, look at you! I've barely known you for thirty seconds, and I feel as though I can talk to you about anything. All of the earth ponies I've met are so warm, friendly, and good. And pegasi! Pegasi are the strongest, bravest ponies I've ever met. True, they're not educated as we are; their education revolves around the sword and lance. But that means they are far nobler, more loyal, more determined than any unicorn or earth pony I could mention.” His smile faded, though, and he looked out one of the windows sadly. “I wish that unicorns, earth ponies, and pegasi could live together without this separation someday. All three of us have a lot to learn from each other. And I believe that there is one thing that can bring us all together.”
“Harmony?” said Pinkie.
“No, science!” Starswirl cried out. “Science shall be the great equalizer! In the world I imagine, nopony will be left without. There shall be great machines to carry ponies through the sky, and devices to carry messages from one side of the kingdom to the other. There will be machines to plow the fields and water the crops, and there will be compounds to prevent death itself! There will be implants to simulate magic, and prosthetics to simulate flight. And in those days, earth ponies and unicorns and pegasi will be one and the same; the earth ponies will leave their fields, the pegasi will leave their clouds, and the unicorns will leave their towers. Alas, I cannot create all of those in my lifetime; would that I had 1000 years! But in the meantime, I'm working my hardest with what I have.”
“That's, err... quite a dream you've got going there.” Sure, there was the telegraph and the zeppelin, but the rest of those were complete fantasy! She didn't have the heart to tell him that ponies would find a way to overcome their distrust without the aid of fancy-pants contraptionology.
“But come, Pinkie. You must tell me more about your world! Oh, but don't tell me too much. I want it to be a surprise.” He gave her a wink, then gestured out to the hallways.
“So, how about I tell you about the first time I got to run Sugarcube Corner all by myself?”
---
“And just like that, we found out what the doozy was! Apparently, it was getting Twilight to trust that my Pinkie Sense really did work after all.”
“Pinkie Sense?”
“Yeah, like—whoa, there it goes right now! Ear flop, eye flutter, knee twitch. Starswirl! Away from the door!”
Not a second before he stepped out of the way, the door next to him swung out, and Noble Blood stepped into the hallway. Behind him were two little fillies: Platinum and a purple-coated filly with an open book cutie mark. Noble Blood commented, “Oh, hello Starswirl, Pinkie. Are you well?”
“Very much so,” he replied. “Pinkie was just telling me about some of her adventures back in her own time.”
“I'm afraid that'll have to wait for another time,” said Noble Blood. “Platinum and Clover are done with their history lessons, but since Platinum is behind, you should probably help her with her magic lessons. Clover could use a refresher on her astrology, too.”
“Aww, and I was just about to get to the story about the time I went and watched the Best Young Flier's competition in Cloudsdale! And that's one of the best stories, too!”
“You went to Cloudsdale?” Noble Blood asked, any thought of Platinum and Clover forgotten. “But you're an earth pony.”
“Oh, that's no problem. My friend Twilight used a spell on us to let us walk on clouds.”
“I see... very interesting...” Noble Blood smirked.
“Why's that?” asked Pinkie.
“Oh. It's just that I've been meaning to talk to Commander Hurricane about our defenses against the diamond dogs in the southwest, and he is too busy to come down to the castle. With that spell, I could visit him up in Clouvergne and discuss our plans.”
“That makes sense.” Beside her, Starswirl lifted one hoof and pressed it slowly to his temples.
“Can we sing a song before we go?” Platinum asked. “Pinkie's really good at songs.”
“Actually, Pinkie sang a really good one a little while ago. How did it go, now? Winter Wrap-up Winter Wrap-up! Let's finish our holiday cheer.”
“But it's autumn!” said Clover.
“Okay, so not that one. Well, what about... help me out here, Pinkie.”
“What about this one? Cuz I love to see you smile, smile, smile, yes I do!”
“Yes, yes, very charming, Miss Pinkie,” Noble Blood said. He corralled the two fillies towards the hallway and headed them away from Starswirl and Pinkie. “Unfortunately, it'll have to wait for another time. These fillies must get to their lessons.”
Only when the three of them were out of earshot did Starswirl tell Pinkie his thoughts. “Perhaps you should have saved that story for when Noble Blood wasn't around.”
“Why?”
“...Never mind. I'll just have to smooth it all out later. Now, you were telling me about a Young Flier's Competition?”
***
That night, Pinkie and the Princess were tucked away in their beds. Although Pinkie tried to fall asleep, all she could think about was her old home. She knew that, theoretically, she could come back right after she left, but she still wondered what Twilight and her family were doing back at the farm. Were they waiting for her anxiously, or had they already forgotten about her? What if she never made it back? What would the Elements of Harmony do without her? Replace her? Suddenly, she regretted coming back. She had been so certain that she would be able to find the gem and get back without a hitch, but suddenly she wasn't so sure.
In the midst of this uncertainty, she heard Platinum whisper to her, "You said you knew about Starswirl. Do you know about me?"
"Yeah," Pinkie replied. "We have an entire holiday for you."
"Oh. Just for me, or...?"
"No, there are five other ponies in it."
"Okay." Silence. "Are we... the six of us, I mean... are we friends?"
"...Sorta? Not really. We do this play where we live out your lives, and you spend most of it fighting everypony else."
"Oh." Silence.
"I mean, Clover's in it! And you and her seem to get along pretty well. You know, I was in the play once. I was a character named Puddinghead. My friend Rarity played you, she looks just like you, and Clover was my friend Twilight Sparkle. ...Twilight..." Pinkie murmured.
"Do you have a family back in your own time?" Platinum asked.
"Yeah, I guess, but I don't really speak to them anymore. We don't get along."
"So it's like you don't have a family either..."
"I guess not," Pinkie said.
"Do you miss your mother?" Platinum asked again, almost insistently.
"Yeah, I do. I wish I could talk to her about it, but she just... isn't there for me anymore." Pinkie didn't hear a response. "Platinum?" she asked. She could hear, faintly, the sound of Platinum quietly sniffling and her tears falling to the ground. Pinkie turned her head away, some invisible attempt to give her privacy. "Goodnight, Princess," said Pinkie. And with that, she fell asleep, dreaming of something warm and close to her.