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// 2: empty memories 
// Story: Silent Whispers 
// by Wandering Blues 
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Somehow I think she knew I would hate living this long. I sometimes wonder if the trees could tell me they feel the same. Could they explain how some days seem to last a moment while others seem to somehow feel like night never existed? I hope I never get the chance for the answer, I'm pretty sure if I did I wouldn't realize I went insane... Or have I already? 

"No... Not yet. Your getting there, but don't worry, I'm here to make sure you won't. After all. We need each other." 

It's been a year or two since I left the orphanage. The foals cried, and begged. Said that I didn't have to leave, some of them swore to find me someday. Chord. His whole being stated betrayal, but I knew it was a word beyond that. Disappointment. Not the simple kind either, it was the kind that is against someone you loved. That's not the word either. I think in some way he knew that It was going to happen.

"Ignoring me again?" 

"No..."

"Good, I want a nice conversation right now."

Misery wakes up every now and then, and when she does It's not something I can ignore. She always wants to talk whenever she is awake. Not like there is anything else she can do really. I just don't see the point in why she needs me to talk out loud.

"Because trying to listen to your thoughts is exhausting. It's like putting your ear against a wall to try and hear a conversation in another room. Have you ever done that? If not I recommend you try it. Harder than it sounds." She gave a small giggle, probably from a bad joke or pun, I never really understand her humor.

"I don't mind talking when we're traveling, it's when we reach a town that it's a problem. They look at me like I'm crazy, and I don't want that when I have to make a few bits telling stories for a simple meal."

"Pffpt. Like you need to eat." She did have a point. Ever since the deal I never really needed any sustenance, she said that it would be unfortunate if her new home needed constant maintenance. I still find it uncomfortable that she called me her 'new home.'

"Its not that I need to its out of routine, sides, I'd like to blend in."

"Please, a traveling stallion- without a cutie mark might I add. Goes place to place telling stories to whoever listens, and if that doesn't work, does other odd jobs. You're a modern Changeling."    Her comment stung, like most of them. Its why I dislike our little conversations, but she's the closest thing to a companion I have. "Well at least we know you're cutie mark isn't luck."  Her last comment made me stop in my tracks.

"Thank you for that observation. In fact thank you for coaxing me into talking to you! I don't know why I even bother, In fact why don't you continue with your small bits of observational humor. I'd love to hear more." I stopped my hoof with anger. Always. Always I think she is there to help me a little and like an idiot I fall for it. 

She gave a giggle as I tried to control my breathing. I pointed my head towards the ground and closed my eyes, and did what I always did. I began to hum the same song my brother used to hum when he would work. Our mother's lullaby... 

That's when I stopped and opened my eyes in shock. I strained with all my might to remember the words, but they weren't there. 

"No... No No No... I remember. I-I remember. It's like walking. I know this. I know the words. I KNOW THE WORDS!" 

I was shaking in anger and fear now. How could I forget the words? They were carved into me and my brother when I we were young. 

"I SANG IT TO CHORD WHEN HE WAS A FOAL. I SANG IT TO THE FOALS. I KNOW THE WORDS!"

I collapsed. Slamming my hooves against the ground like a young colt with a tantrum. I could feel my eyes start to tear up but never fall, and slowly the feelings I felt started to slowly disappear. Like the lullaby I once knew. After another few moments I felt empty and tried to remember what I was doing.

"You done with your little break? We still have a little ways to go before the next town..." She spoke in a matter of fact tone, and I remembered what I was doing and how I felt but I couldn't retrieve those emotions I once felt. I stood up slowly and let out a sigh.

"If I could hate you I would, but I'm sure you would take that away from me too."

"I see that you're slowly learning." She couldn't help but laugh, and after a minute or two of laughter I felt her yawn. "I'll leave you to your thoughts for now. Good night Frosted Harvest. Take me somewhere new..."

I continued to walk. Humming the tune to the lullaby hoping I could somehow remember the words. Somehow piece them together. It was a desperate futile attempt, but I won't quit. I can't quit. If I ever do I'll forget, and be another empty memory. That was when I decided to stop and pulled out that book of tales, opened it and wrote in small words within the cover of the book.


'You had a brother, and a son who you named after. Swift Chord.
You had an orphanage you ran, a home to go back to. Glowing Iris is taking care of them.
Your son is a brown pony with a blue and grey stripped mane. 
Misery is taking your memories away from you. 
Your name is Frosted Harvest.'


I also wrote down the music of the lullaby underneath what I wrote. There wasn't anything else I could had written down that seemed important. I was trying to protect something I had no control over, but I know I wouldn't lose who I was as a whole and I knew I wouldn't give up. Not without a fight. Not without a reason.