Cubic Zirconia

by arcum42


Cleanup Time

Diamond Tiara trudged slowly up the ramp, tired, and looking much worse for wear. From inside the clubhouse, she could hear the occasional hoofstep, and things being moved around. Oh good, she thought to herself, Scootaloo must be back.

It was only later that it occurred to her that somepony else could have been in the clubhouse making noise, or, for that matter, that she wasn't supposed to actually like Scootaloo. Fortunately, this time Scootaloo was alone.  

She looked up as Diamond entered, wrinkled her nose, and said "Man, Diamond, you really stink."

It goes without saying that this wasn't what Diamond wanted to hear after the day she'd had.

"And now you're starting in on me, too? It's just 'kick Diamond while she's down day', isn't it?" she fumed. "If I suck so badly, I suppose you won't want me staying here, either, then! I'll just find… a bush or something to sleep in, I g-guess…"
 
Diamond turned around in a huff, trying to keep herself from crying. She took a few steps down the ramp, not even really sure where she was going. Before she'd gone too far, she felt a tug on her tail. She turned and glared behind her. Scootaloo released Diamond's tail from her mouth, looking as though she'd just tasted something foul.

"Woah, woah, woah! That is not what I meant. Chill a little. It sounds like somepony had a bad day," Scootaloo said, sounding exasperated. "It just smells like you haven't had a bath in days, that's all. I could tell when you walked in by my nose alone."

That hadn't even occurred to her. She slumped a bit, hating to think of the condition she must be in, and suddenly itched all over just thinking about it.

She wiped off her eyes with one foreleg. "Oh."

"You know, you don't look so hot, either. Your coat is all dirty, there are green stains on your muzzle, and I saw something green sticking out of your teeth," Scootaloo said, then did a double-take. "Wait, have you been eating grass?"

Diamond's ears drooped as she remembered her attempts at getting lunch.

"I was so hungry," she told Scootaloo, feeling downhearted. "I haven't had anything else to eat for…"

Her voice trailed off as she tried to remember the last time she'd eaten a good meal. Scootaloo seemed to have gotten the idea, though.

"I know you don't have many bits, but-" Scootaloo said. "I'll tell you what, hold on a sec. I'll be right back."

Scootaloo pushed past Diamond on the ramp and headed down. Diamond heard some rustling, and a few minutes later, Scootaloo was back. Bits of twig and leaves were in her mane and coat, and she was carrying a few apples. She gave them to Diamond, and the two of them headed into the clubhouse.

"Why don't you eat these first, and then we'll talk."

How had Scootaloo done that? That was embarrassing, and she hated being dependant on Scootaloo. She really, really hated it. But she hadn't gotten enough grass earlier to do more than take the edge of her hunger. She gobbled down the apples, core and all, only pausing to spit out the seeds. Scootaloo watched with poorly concealed amusement.

Finally having gotten something substantial in her, she became a bit more self-conscious.

"Where did you even get these from?"

Scootaloo gave her a 'boy are you dumb' look. It seemed like she was getting a lot of those lately.

"The apple trees." Scootaloo pointed to the door. "Right outside the clubhouse? All over the place, in fact?"

Diamond looked more than a little put out. "I tried kicking one of those trees to get some apples earlier! I can still feel it in one of my hind legs! How did you get them down?"

"Diamond," Scootaloo replied as she shook her head. "You don't just kick them. You have to know how and where. It's an Apple family thing. Just kicking them any ol' which way won't work."

"You're not an Apple either, though," she pointed out.

"Well, no," she said, "but I'm pretty good at climbing up trees."

"Climbing trees." Diamond put her foreleg to her forehead and closed her eyes. "Right."

Her mother had always told her climbing trees wasn't a proper activity for a young lady. She'd always followed everything her mommy told her, but surviving was more important than being a proper young lady. The trouble was she didn't really know how to do it. She'd probably fall and break something.

And it's not like she was athletic like Scootaloo was. Diamond watched as she opened a trap door on the ceiling and pulled things out. She was pretty sure she wouldn't have even been able to reach it.

"What's all that stuff for?" she asked, pointing at the tub Scootaloo had pulled down. It had a scrub brush, a bar of soap, and a bottle of some sort of green goop inside it. Scootaloo grabbed a few towels and tossed them in as well. 

"We're gonna take a quick trip down to the pond," Scootaloo said.

"What for?"

"Well, I'm ready for a bath myself. And you are way more than ready." Scootaloo waved in Diamond's direction. "Obviously, we don't have a bathroom or anything, but there are ways around that."

A bath would certainly be lovely, but that stuff wasn't anything she associated with a proper bath. No bath salts, bubble bath, or bath toys, for one thing. Whatever. Let's see what Scootaloo has in mind.

"Alright," she said, resigning herself to yet more walking. "Let's go."

Scootaloo picked up the large tub and awkwardly balanced it on her back. "I'd usually toss this in our wagon. No chance of that, though. It was pretty smashed up."

With everypony talking about Apple Bloom's hind legs, she hadn't thought much about their wagon. It would have been damaged, though, wouldn't it?

Scootaloo slowly walked down the ramp, and Diamond Tiara trotted after her.

"You know, how did that wagon manage to hit Apple Bloom hard enough to break her legs, anyway?"

Scootaloo glared back at her, as if she wasn't sure if Diamond was trying to make fun of her.

"Didn't you see it? It was your fault, after all," Scootaloo growled.

Diamond shrank away from Scootaloo. "I was kinda far away, and by the time I got closer, Miss Cheerilee was yelling at me."

"We all got tossed out of the wagon, but Apple Bloom landed on some rocks right in front of it, and her hind legs got caught between the two," Scootaloo explained. "You really just thought it'd be funny?"

Somehow, with all the horrible things that had happened to her, even if things had gone as planned, it didn't seem that funny any more.

"I don't know." She sighed. "It just seems dumb now. It was dumb. And now everypony in town hates me."

"I doubt everypony would even have heard 'bout it," Scootaloo said, then frowned. "I know you weren't able to get apples earlier, but why didn't you just buy something for lunch?"

"Because everypony does hate me," she insisted. "When I went to buy lunch, they wouldn't sell me anything!"

"What?" Scootaloo asked, surprised. "Even if they don't like you, usually they'll sell you something. That's why they're there! They might overcharge you, of course."

"They wouldn't. The stallion in the stall started yelling at me. At me!"

"At somepony who looked like they'd gone rolling in the dirt a few times?" Scootaloo said.

"That was from later. I went to visit my mother."

"Don't think I've met her. Good idea, though. Maybe she could take you in or talk to your father for you," Scootaloo said, looking hopeful, probably at the prospect of not having to deal with her in the future. "How is she?"

"Dead,"  Diamond said flatly.

"Oh," Scootaloo said. "I'm sorry."

"She's been dead. I just-" Diamond shook her head. "I don't really feel like talking about it, okay?"

"Alright," Scootaloo replied, and they continued walking in silence. Once they got near the pond, Scootaloo stopped for a minute and wiped the sweat off her forehead with one wing, panting. The stuff on her back must be heavy.

"So, what now?" Diamond asked, still not sure what they were doing.

Scootaloo put the tub down, and started emptying it.

"We're close enough to the pond, I think," Scootaloo said, looking over at the pond. "Now we need to take this bucket and fill the tub with water."

"Wouldn't the water in the pond be all muddy, though?" Diamond asked.

She shook her head. "Nah, it's pretty clean. Kinda cold, but it's warm enough out right now. Winter is a pain, though."

Yeah, when it's snowing or the pond is covered in ice would be a problem. "What do you do during winter?"

"I don't take baths nearly as often, that's for sure. It seems like a lot of Cutie Mark Crusader sleepovers happened last winter, though."

So Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle were helping her out. It must be nice to have friends like that. She missed Silver Spoon even more, thinking about it.

Scootaloo brought the bucket over to the pond, filled it, and dumped water into the tub. Then she went back to the pond, and repeated the whole thing all over again. She kept doing it until the tub was mostly full, pausing once to scoop a fish out of the tub and bring it back to the pond.

"I don't know if you noticed, but there's a cork here on the side." Scootaloo tapped the side of the tub, where there was indeed a cork plugged in. "I'm gonna get in and scrub myself down with the brush and soap, and wash my mane and tail. Then I'll pull out the cork to drain it, and it'll be your turn."

Diamond dipped one foreleg into the pond experimentally and shivered. Summer or not, that water was cold!

"This doesn't seem very much like a proper bath to me," she said.

"Oh?" Scootaloo replied. "What would you consider a proper bath, then?"

"Well, first I'd call for Grey, and he'd draw up a bath for me. I'd check the temperature and get in, he'd add rose-scented bubble bath to it, bath salts, and a few toys, then he'd start scrubbing my back…" her voice faded off as she saw Scootaloo's look of disgust.

"Man, you really were spoiled, weren't you?" she said. "I've had baths at a buncha places, including at Rarity's, and none of them were like that. Though sleeping over at the Carousel Boutique was close. Certainly nopony's ever scrubbed my back for me."

Diamond Tiara bristled. "And what's wrong with that?"

"Nothing if you don't wanna be able to take care of things when nopony is there. But if you hafta do things without help, and you can't even take a bath by yourself…"

She was actually getting pretty worried about that, and not just in regards to baths. But she wasn't about to admit that to Scootaloo.

"I can manage."

Scootaloo sighed. "Sure you can. Well, watch me while I take my bath, I guess, and just try to do the same thing when it's your turn."

With that, Scootaloo jumped in the tub, splashing Diamond with water. Diamond sputtered and shook herself off indignantly. She was pretty sure watching somepony else bathe had absolutely no decorum to it, so she tried to ignore her, no matter what Scootaloo might have said.

Not that Scootaloo made that easy, of course, as she seemed to feel it was her duty to provide Diamond with a running commentary.

"So, you splash all around and get yourself good and wet. Then rub soap all over, especially in hard to reach places, like under your wings…"

"I don't have wings," Diamond interjected.

"Next you grab this scrub brush, and scrub off all the soap," Scootaloo said proudly, like she'd just described how to solve a complex physics problem. "Easy."

Right. She could have figured that much out. But Scootaloo just kept up the chatter. She scrubbed as Diamond tried to avert her gaze, then grabbed that awful-looking bottle of green goop.

"Now, just rub the shampoo in your mane and tail, work it in real good, wait a minute, then wash it out."

Diamond thought back to her own previous baths. She knew something about this. "Aren't you supposed to have separate shampoos for your mane and tail?"

"Why bother?" Scootaloo shrugged. "It's not like I got a buncha bits for shampoo or anything. No conditioner, either, if you're gonna ask 'bout that next. Not quite sure what it's for, actually."

Well, this was certainly going to be crude. She was distracted when Scootaloo jumped out of the tub. Wet and dripping, she shook herself off, splashing Diamond yet again.

As Diamond gave her a glare, Scootaloo wrapped herself in a towel, and pulled the cork out of the tub. While it drained, she dried herself off, then put the cork back in.

"I'll right, I'm done," she told Diamond. "Just fill it with the bucket, and you can get started."

Diamond looked at her blankly. "Fill it?"

"Yes, fill it," Scootaloo snapped at her. "I brought all this stuff here myself, I filled mine, I'll probably be lugging it back, and I'm helping you out with buying dinner. I'm not filling the tub for you, and I'm not scrubbing your back. Got it?"

Diamond waved one foreleg dismissively. "Fine, fine."

She trudged over and filled up the bucket from the pond, then lugged over to the tub and dumped it in. Filled, it was actually pretty heavy. With a sigh, she picked up the handle with her teeth, and took it over to fill it again.

"Make sure you don't scoop up anything else with the water," Scootaloo said, and pulled a piece of seaweed out of the tub. Diamond just ignored her and kept filling. Once it was high enough, and she was too tired to fill it further, she delicately stepped in. Gah, that's cold.

Scootaloo shrugged. "You'll get used to it after a bit."

Somehow, that didn't seem likely. Now where did that bar of soap go? Diamond started fishing around, and after nearly slipping, found it. She started crudely smearing the soap all over her body.

Rudely enough, Scootaloo seemed to still be watching her as she bathed. Worse, she started up her commentary again.

"You missed a spot over there," she said, pointing.

Diamond quickly smeared soap on the spot in question. "I was just about to get that!"

Finally, when she figured she'd gotten everywhere, she set down the bar of soap. Scootaloo seemed to have different ideas, though.

"Aren't you gonna clean under your tail and between your hind legs?" Scootaloo said.

Diamond flushed. Scootaloo wanted her to do what?

"Why are you even looking there?" she yelled.

"You don't wanna end up smelling like pee, do you?"

She huffed a bit, but decided Scootaloo had a point, and reluctantly gave in.

"Fine, but just… don't watch me, okay?"

Scootaloo did look away for a minute, much to her relief. Then Diamond started scrubbing all the soap off, and Scootaloo was right back on her case.

It seemed like her comments just came one after another: "You know, you aren't holding that right."

Moments later, it was: "You're missing spots again."

Then: "I think you need to scrub over there harder."

At this point, Diamond wasn't too sure if Scootaloo was trying to be helpful or annoy her. Possibly both. She picked up the shampoo, and immediately had more on her mind once she looked at the label.

"A sophisticated formulation guaranteed to prevent fleas and ticks… This is dog shampoo!" she said.

"So what?" Scootaloo said. "Winona has a nice, shiny coat, doesn't she?"

"Yeah, but…"

"This is the same shampoo she uses." Scootaloo waved one hoof. "The exact same shampoo, in fact. Applejack accidentally bought a new bottle when she didn't need to, and Apple Bloom grabbed the old one."

"B-but it's for a dog!" Diamond sputtered.

"It's still mostly the same stuff. I've used it on my mane and tail without problems. It's even better, really. Do you want fleas and ticks?"

Grumbling, she started lathering up her mane and tail. Afterwards, something occurred to her. "Do I actually need to worry about fleas?"

"Not with that shampoo you don't!" Scootaloo quipped. "The clubhouse is kinda in the open, though, and they could get in. I've done a few things to try and keep them out, though."

She tilted her head curiously, then quickly wiped off some shampoo suds that were on a collision course for her eyes. "Like what?"

"Do you remember the clubhouse kinda smelling like peppermint when you came in?"

The main thing that reminded her of Twist's peppermint sticks. She shrugged.

"I looked it up. Fleas don't like the smell of peppermint."

Sure they don't, Scootaloo. When are you ever in a library?

Diamond rinsed out her mane and tail, unplugged the hole and let the water drain out. She daintily stepped out of the tub. She then grinned, stepped closer to Scootaloo, and started shaking all over, getting as much of the water on her as she could before grabbing another towel and rubbing her fur off.

"Hey!" Scootaloo yelped. "No fair!"

"You did it to me twice," she said smugly. "If anything, you still owe me one. But I shall ignore that out of the kindness of my heart."

"You have a heart?" Scootaloo muttered.

Ignoring her, Diamond dried herself off, then wrapped the towel around her mane. She glanced back at the tub and noticed something.

"Um, Scoots?" Diamond asked, somehow feeling a bit closer to her after their banter. "How are we going to get that tub back without, like, getting mud all over the place?"
 
Scootaloo glanced back at her, one eyebrow raised at the use of her nickname. "Well, I guess I'll just rinse it off, then one of us will carry it back on that extra towel I brought along."

A few minutes later, the orange pegasus had the tub rinsed off, and had gotten rid of the mud that got on her in the process.

"I'll tell you what. I'm kinda tired now," she said. "Why don't you carry it back, Diamond?"

"Do I have to?" Diamond said automatically.

Scootaloo gave her a look that said she'd better grab the tub right now or there'd be trouble. She sighed, put the extra towel over her back, and put the tub on top. Scootaloo grabbed the bucket and stuck it in the tub with everything else.

"Come on," Scootaloo said, and the two of them slowly walked back to the clubhouse. When they got to the ramp, she looked at it for a moment dubiously.

"Don't worry, I'll be right on your tail," Scootaloo assured her.

As she proceeded slowly up the ramp, the tub kept wanting to slip in this direction and that one, and every so often, Scootaloo nudged it back into position. Eventually Diamond dropped the tub on the clubhouse floor with a clatter. Scootaloo grabbed it back up, and shoved it back where she'd gotten it from.

"Well, after all that, I'm ready for dinner. Why don't you come to the market with me. If you give me the bits to pay for it, I'll buy your dinner, and you won't hafta deal with nasty merchants."

Diamond was embarrassed to realise that after those apples, she was still hungry. She'd missed several meals, and they hadn't really been enough, though they had helped a lot. Well, looked like she was going to need to be even more dependant on Scootaloo.

It was funny, though. Diamond had always pretty much considered Scootaloo comic relief. The funny flightless pegasus that buzzed around on her scooter, and was always trying to get her cutie mark. A real loser. But Scoots was okay. She vaguely wondered what else she had been wrong about.

"So, I guess we're just waiting for Sweetie Belle, then?" she asked.

Scootaloo raised one eyebrow. "You think the three of us spend all our time outside of school together? We do spend a bunch of time crusading, but not every day."

"So she's probably just having dinner at the Carousel Boutique, then?"

"She's at home with her parents," Scootaloo corrected. "She doesn't always stay with her sister either, you know."

"Oh, right," Diamond said. She wasn't sure she'd even met Sweetie Belle's parents, actually. "Give me a few minutes and we can head over, then. I've done more walking in the last few days then I remember ever doing."

"Well, that'll give us a few minutes to talk about this morning, then," Scootaloo said, crossing her forelegs.

She glanced at Scootaloo. "Actually, I think I'm ready."

"You know, you hafta go to school," Scootaloo said. "Ponies get suspicious if you're out during school hours, and you'll have trouble finding a job later if you don't."

"I can't go back," Diamond told Scootaloo again. "Everypony hates me. I think they were going to try and break my legs yesterday."

"Look, I've always had to deal with bullies, but I still go to school every day," Scootaloo frowned and Diamond winced, realising she had been one of them. "It's just part of life."

"I couldn't even call Miss Cheerilee over to get some help, though," Diamond said.

"She isn't always gonna be there. Of course—that's right, you weren't there today or half of yesterday, so you wouldn't know."

"Know what?" Diamond asked.

"Miss Cheerilee saw that issue of the Foal Free Press. She gave us a long lecture about good journalism yesterday after lunch, and announced a few staff openings at the paper."

"But she was really upset at me! I heard her yelling the other day!" Diamond protested.

"Maybe so, but she was really upset about this, too," Scootaloo continued. "When she found out how you were chased away from school, she handed out detentions to everypony involved."

"How would she even know what happened?" Diamond said, perplexed.

"Not everypony hates you. Twist, Silver Spoon, and one or two others told her about it."

This made no sense. "So she isn't upset I left?"

Scootaloo scowled. "Well, you might get talked to about yelling at Twist. What didja do that for?"

"I don't know, alright?" Diamond defended herself. "It felt like I was losing Silvy to Twist, and I just lost it."

"That hardly helped ponies' opinions of you, you know."

"Yeah." Diamond sighed. "I figured out afterwards that Twist was, like, trying to be nice to me, too."

"Anyways, try to go back to school on Monday? Apple Bloom gets out of the hospital tomorrow, so she'll probably be the center of attention in any case."

"Wait. Apple Bloom's getting out of the hospital tomorrow?"

"And we're having a Cutie Mark Crusader meeting here, too," Scootaloo stated. "You might want to talk to her first, you know? Getting a wheelchair up that ramp oughta be fun."

Oh Celestia, I'm gonna have to talk to her about all this tomorrow. She's gonna kill me.

"So, ready for dinner?" Scootaloo asked.

With a lump in her throat, Diamond just nodded and followed Scootaloo out of the clubhouse.