Chapter 13:
We
“The little protégé is going to love this next part.”
There was a bright light, and I had to close my eyes. My hooves lifted off the ground.
I was standing on the top of a gentle, grassy hill under a splendid night sky where a full Moon shone bright. The hill was surrounded by a vast forest on all sides; an island in the sea of leaves. A tender breeze made the tall grass whisper.
A young filly emerged from between the trees, and made her determined way to the top of the hill. Her little horn barely reached above the grass as she waded upwards. She didn't seem to notice me.
When she reached the top, I noticed she wasn't just a unicorn, for she had herself a pair of wings. I looked at this tiny blue figure, and I realised: it was Luna's foalhood self from ages long lost. At the crest of the hill, little Luna closed her eyes and her horn began glowing. There was a sudden burst of wind around her, and the tall grass swirled and fell, creating a soft bed on the ground for her. She sat down and looked up at the sky with utter wonder in her eyes.
“Hello,” she said with a smile.
She wasn't looking at me—she couldn't have been—but there was nopony else there.
“I'm fine, thank you,” she said. “And how are you? Got a little fat again, I see?”
Luna giggled. And I realised that she was talking to the Moon. Or rather, talking with the Moon, judging by her attitude.
“Hey, it's okay!” she shouted in a worried tone, hopping onto her hooves. “It's okay. I keep telling you, I don't care. I will always be right here for you. Even when you hide. Don't worry.” She sat down again. “That's right.”
She sat there for several minutes, just smiling at the Moon. Occasionally, she tilted her head and batted an ear, as if listening to a tale. She nodded a few times, giggling, perhaps acknowledging something clever. She gave her full attention—and childlike admiration—to the silent sky.
“Oh, Nanny Moon,” she said, waving a dismissive hoof, “you so silly! Of course they love you. Everypony loves you. You keep saying that. Don't be saying that. I'm sorry, what was that?”
Luna gasped. At the bottom of the hill, where she came from, there was some noise again.
“No, no,” Luna whispered hurriedly. “Thanks. I'll, we'll talk again. Shoo. Shoo!”
The Moon, of course, didn't go anywhere. There was a new arrival, however: a taller, white figure made her way through the grass. She was able to advance much faster than the little one did. And this must be Celestia, I collected.
“Luna?” she asked, reaching the top. “What are you doing out here?”
“We... I mean I was just... talking to the Moon.”
“The Moon?” Celestia chortled. “The Moon's not alive, stupid.”
Her tone was playful, but I could tell it hurt Luna.
“Tia, language!” she said.
“Oh, I'm sorry.” Celestia laughed again, sitting down beside Luna. She looked up at the sky as well. “Hear that? Sorry!” she yelled, still laughing. She slowly stopped, and sighed. “It's beautiful, though, I'll give you that.”
“I know,” Luna said, puffing her chest proudly. “And soon it'll all be mine.”
“That's right. You know, I'm glad you're finally taking over the night.”
“Hmm?” Luna turned to Celestia. “Why's that?”
“I just cannot stand it. It's very you.”
“Hey!”
“No, I mean, it's so... sombre.”
Luna raised an eyebrow. “What does that mean?”
It wasn't the implication that escaped her, but the actual meaning of that last word. Little Luna wasn't quite the orator she would become just yet, it seemed.
Celestia reached a hoof around Luna, and pulled her close. “Hmm, maybe you should read a few more books first. You're not ready.”
“Am too,” she replied. “And my sky will be so much better than yours.”
“What?” Celestia asked. “The Sun is nothing to scowl at.”
“Yes, well, that's because she blinds you if you do.”
“That only makes one appreciate its beauty more.”
“That makes no sense.”
“Yes it does.”
“Does not.”
“Does too.”
“Does not!”
Celestia burst out laughing. “All right, Luna, you win. It doesn't make any sense.”
“See?” Luna grinned.
“It's still true, though.” Celestia sent her a cheeky wink.
“That makes no sense.”
“Yes it does.”
“Does not.”
The scene slowly withered before my eyes. Sounds were muffled, colours were drained, then the shapes became blurry, and soon there was nothing left.
Large stone bricks began stacking themselves in the nameless aether. Walls were erected, a ceiling was built, and a floor slid under my hooves. There was a spark of flames, and a fireplace lit up. The room seemed ancient in design, but freshly built. The grey walls were offset by the warm colours emanating from the dancing fire.
Celestia paced up and down, shaking her head. I could tell by the way she carried herself that she was a grown mare now, both in body and mind. Luna, also much taller now, sat in the middle of the room, hanging her head in shame.
“You can't keep running off like that,” Celestia said. “Not if you can't keep track of time.”
“I just wanted to give her some company,” Luna whispered.
Celestia sighed heavily. “It's a gigantic rock anchored to the planet. It does not need your company.”
Luna didn't answer.
“Look, Luna,” Celestia continued. “If you want to go outside and stare at the Moon, go ahead, be my guest. But I've been telling you, you're going to miss the time one of these days. And what was it you kept saying?”
No answer.
“No, no, Tia. I know what time it is. No, I won't miss it. You can trust me, Tia.” Celestia scoffed. “You are such an, you're such a... irresponsible. That's what you are, Luna, irresponsible.”
“Look, it doesn't even matter!” Luna snapped. “I did lower the Moon! It's not like I forgot.”
“Yes, yes you did forget. Don't act like you didn't.”
“It wasn't even five minutes!”
“Four minutes and thirty-three more seconds before the start of dawn, Luna. Do you really think that doesn't matter?”
“Does it?”
“Does it?!” Celestia stopped pacing, and stormed straight up to Luna. “Does it? That's that much less time for flowers to bloom. For bees to fly. That's that much less time to play for the children. That much less time for our subjects to work and live. Don't even get me started on the global wind systems. They depend on the heat from the Sun, don't you get that? And if the winds stop, they... you could wipe out all life on the face of this planet.” She knocked on Luna's head with a hoof. “Did that sink in?!”
Luna sniffed.
“And now you're crying.” Celestia rolled her eyes. “Go ahead, bawl like you always do. Bawl at your incompetence.”
“It was an accident!” Luna yelled, tears dropping onto the floor. “We didn't mean to keep your precious Sun!”
“It's not about the... what do you mean, we?”
Luna put a hoof before her mouth, realising what she said. “It's, it's tradition, to use the royal we when discussing the—”
“There is no such tradition, Luna!”
Luna gasped.
Celestia lowered her voice. “Look, Luna, please—”
Luna got up and burst out of the room. When I turned to look where she was going, I found myself in a different place. There was a balcony, and I could tell I was high in a tower overlooking a great forest. There was a bed, a desk, and star charts hung from the wall above it. A telescope set lay against a wall, close by. A mirror hung just above the bed.
The door burst open, and Luna stamped inside, slamming the door shut with a kick of her hind hooves. She hopped into the bed and looked up into the mirror, still with tears in her eyes. Then there was an uncertain knock on the door.
“Luna?” came Celestia's voice. “Luna, please, don't do this. Talk to me.”
Luna eyed the mirror for a while, then shouted. “We have nothing to say to you!”
“Please. I just want to talk to... to both of you.”
“She thinks we're insane,” Luna whispered at the mirror. “She's ridiculing us all the time.”
“Luna?”
“We told you!” she shouted again. “Go away!”
“I'll... I'll be downstairs if you change your mind.”
“Tell me about it,” Luna whispered. “I know. I know. What?”
She gaped.
“What? No! Nanny, don't... that's not our name. We should what? That's insane! No. I'm not like her. I'm nothing like her. Don't say that. Don't, ever. But that's not our name. And we're not... I said no!”
Luna kicked the mirror, and it shattered into a thousand tiny pieces. The little shards fell onto the bed, and Luna's hoof trembled as she pulled back.
“No, no, no, no....” she whispered, looking at the pieces before her. “I didn't mean to... I'm sorry. Nanny? Can you hear me? Nanny? Nanny!”
Struggling with her tears, she picked up a pillow and wiped the pieces of broken glass from it. She took a deep breath and lowered her head, pressing her muzzle into the soft pillow and closing her eyes. As she did, my sight went dark as well. I could feel the warmth of her breath on my face.
Then there was a long, muffled scream.
It echoed in my head even after she stopped. For a while, there was only the darkness and Luna's lingering scream.
Luna lay in her bed, looking at the ceiling.
I lay in the bed, looking at the ceiling.
I was Luna.
It was late at night, and the stars were blocked by dark clouds. Even the Moon didn't shine through. I was in complete darkness. I was in complete silence.
But I was not alone.
I could tell. I felt her eyes on me. She was standing at the foot of the bed. I knew she couldn't be there. If I had turned my head, I'd have found that there's nothing there. But I was too afraid to turn my head.
When I slept, she peered into my dreams.
I was out on the hill again, but the Moon was silent. She wasn't in the Moon; she was right behind me. When I turned to look, she hid in the grass so that I couldn't see her.
When I took a step, I could hear her moving too.
I was eating my dinner, locked alone in the cellar in hopes that I would not be disturbed. She hid behind a long shelf, and when I looked, she hopped behind another one so that I couldn't find her.
When I lifted a bite to my mouth, she asked if I would share.
I stood in a field of flowers, under the shining Sun, hoping that its light would drive her away. She took refuge in the shadow of a tree, hiding behind the trunk when I looked her way.
When my head was turned, I could hear her sing to me.
The thunder of her hooves crushed my dreams into nightmares, and ground my hopes into sorrow. I felt the warmth of her breath on my neck and I heard the chattering of her teeth at my ears. She was behind every door I opened and outside every window I looked. She was in my home and in my room and in my mind.
I've gone mad.
I wasn't Luna any more.
A peaceful breeze caressed my mane. The Moon was full again above the grassy hill. The grass, somehow, didn't seem as tall now. At the crest of the hill, a tall figure stood, silhouetted by the light of the Moon. She wasn't looking at it.
Her mane flowed slowly in the air, and her tail seemed a fog of darkness in the night. She wore an elegantly crafted set of armour on her pitch-black coat. The chestplate was broad; wearing it, she always looked proud. Her helmet was a mask to hide who she used to be.
Celestia came out from the forest again, marching upwards on the slope. Even in the dark, I could tell she was shaking with every step.
“Luna?” she asked. Her voice trembled.
“No,” the figure replied.
“Luna, don't do this. I beg of you. Come back to me.”
“Luna is dead.”
“Stop it, Luna! I know you want to come back. So just do.”
“My name is not Luna.”
Celestia stepped up to her, and leaned close to her face.
One of the mares trembled. The other stood tall. One was on the verge of tears. The other showed no emotion.
“Do you even recognise me?” Celestia asked.
“I am not your little sister any more.”
“Who are you?”
There was a flash of light, and Celestia was blown from the hilltop and sent tumbling down. The black figure watched in amusement.
“I am what you fear when you look behind yourself in the dark. I am why the children are afraid of the night. I haunt the weak in their loneliest hour. I sew the dreams of the brave into chilling horror. I am the engine of fear, and the devourer of hope.”
For the first time, the mare showed emotion. She laughed.
“My name is Nightmare Moon.”
Celestia sprung into the sky. Her wings spread wide, and her eyes glowed. A glimmer of light broke the darkness behind the mare atop the hill. Nightmare Moon, in turn, cast a spell of her own. The dawning Sun first froze in the sky, then began its descent behind the horizon. As the Sun fell, so did Celestia plummet to the ground.
Nightmare Moon smiled. “The night will last forever.”
At once, the scenery began shifting before my eyes, too fast to comprehend it all. I saw images, demonstrations of horror, all of which were etched into the memory of Princess Luna, and now mine.
A vampire sucked a mare dry.
A werewolf tore a family apart.
An amorphous behemoth—a moving mountain—consumed a town in one single foul gulp.
Night Guards impaled their Royal Guard brethren on their spears and waved the heads in the air to greet a returning Celestia.
And all along, emanating from every wound, echoing in every scene, corrupting every cry for help, I heard the perverse laughter of Nightmare Moon.
The thunder of her hooves crushed dreams into nightmares, and ground hopes into sorrow.
Celestia watched; she watched for as long as she could. She tried to reason with her sister, but the Longest Night never ended.
When Celestia could watch no longer, and words finally failed her, she made a grave decision.
Nightmare Moon was in the sky, revelling in the end of her world. The air was as cold as her heart. She liked it. Then Celestia appeared. She didn't rally an army. She was alone in facing her. Nightmare Moon could only laugh.
Then Celestia got closer, and I saw that her eyes were closed. Six lights swirled around her. In the distance, behind the flying white figure, a ray of light spread across the horizon once again. Celestia's closed eyes were glowing aflame.
And I saw Celestia as I had never seen her before. Blinding. Burning. Furious. Unfettered. There, in an instant, I understood why Luna was so terrified of the prospect of Cadence treading the same path. I understood why Luna would do anything to save her from having to face the same power.
I did not accept that Luna's decision to hide Cadence's crimes was justifiable. I could not accept that Cadence was without guilt. I would sooner die than condone the murder of innocents. Yet in that moment, I understood.
If the memory of That Fateful Day burns as bright in Luna's mind as it burned my own eyes, I can only pray to the powers that be that they will help her forget it.
And Celestia opened her eyes.
I was lying on a cold floor. Somewhere nearby, a mare was humming a slow song. I didn't have the strength to get up.
“Hush now, quiet now,” the mare sang softly, “it's time to lay your sleepy head.”
The melody was soothing.
“Hush now, quiet now, it's time to go to bed.”
I got onto my hooves and looked around. I was in a small island of light amidst total blackness. Before me, the light illuminated a few standing metal bars that looked like those of a prison cell. The singing was emanating from within.
I heard the sound of hooves moving on hard floor. A shadowed figure appeared within the cell, and sat down quietly by the bars, looking at me. Although very little light reached inside, the mare had enough distinctive features for me to recognise.
“Greetings, Twilight Sparkle,” Nightmare Moon said. “It's been a long time, hasn't it?”
I took a cautious step back from the bars. “This isn't a memory, then.”
She smiled. “I can see why Tia chose you. You're clever, Twilight Sparkle.”
You're a sarcastic little fiend, aren't you? “What are you doing here?”
“I've been asking myself that very same question these past few years. I was hoping you could tell me, seeing that you were the one to sentence me here.”
“You should be dead.”
“Am I not dead? What is an unused idea, if not dead?”
“Stand away,” I heard Luna say as he walked up beside me. “You should not be here, Twilight Sparkle.”
“Lulu!” Nightmare Moon smiled. “My little Lulu. Come, give nanny a hug.”
“Disgusting creature,” Luna said.
“Don't be so hard on yourself,” Nightmare Moon replied. “I remember what you remember. You made me to fill a void in your heart that you couldn't explain. I am everything you've ever wanted to be. I gave you everything you've ever wanted to have. I was your only friend.”
She looked at me for a moment. When she looked back at Luna, her voice was louder and angrier with each word.
“And then, when you found somepony else, this is how you rewarded me, you ungrateful wretch!” She stomped, and I heard the floor crack beneath her hooves, and the cracks healed the moment they appeared. “No wonder everypony hates us.”
“You are dead to me,” Luna said, “and so will you remain.”
“Ah, and that's what terrifies you the most, isn't it, Lulu?” Nightmare Moon got up and stuck her muzzle out of the cell, pressing her cheeks between two bars. Her eye twitched, and there was a sizzling noise. “You know that this is where I will be until the end of our eternal life.”
The fur on Nightmare Moon's cheeks burned away first. Then the thin layer of skin and flesh melted, revealing fanglike teeth. Luna put a hoof onto her own cheek, as if feeling the pain.
“Inside your head,” Nightmare Moon whispered.
Luna's horn glowed, and the prison disappeared.
I found myself in a large, long chamber. Enormous windows bathed everything in shining light. A red carpet ran the length of the room, and led to an ornate throne that sat high atop a set of stairs. On that throne, Cadence lay, slumped limp.
Luna was beside me. “I don't know what you've seen, Twilight, but it changes nothing. What I was, what I did, none of that matters. You have to understand. We need to help Cadence. She doesn't know what she's doing. She can't control it.”
Can't she? I wondered. Luna's memories served only to mystify the matter further. Is the Cadence I know a hapless victim, or a willing participant?
We began walking to the throne.
“Luna,” I asked, “what do you propose that we do?”
“We have to save Cadence.”
“From what exactly? I'm sorry to say, but for all the things I've paid witness to tonight, I'm still at a loss as to what's going on.”
“The other Cadence is to her what Nightmare Moon was to me. The malignant influence must be purged.”
“The Elements of Harmony can do that.”
Luna stopped. “Can they? Have they? No, child. Don't you know what they did to me? Have you forgotten about Discord?” I saw her gulp. “I will never let Cadence suffer. She doesn't deserve it.”
“No matter how you slice it, there's blood on her hooves.”
“As there is on mine.”
I looked up at the throne. Cadence's sleep was undisturbed by our conversation. Peaceful as she was, it was indeed hard to imagine that she was the monster the other Cadence claimed her to be. Luna resumed walking.
“You can control dreams,” I said. “You can erase memories. Erase the other Cadence.”
“I tried,” she replied. “But I can't do it. She's too ingrained.”
As we reached the stairs, Luna put a hoof before me and I stopped. She pointed up at the throne. At its base, I saw the twisting roots of a tree sprouting from the ground. They were withered and dwindling, yet they climbed the throne, wilfully clinging to its side.
“Every thought, every last flicker of Cadence's imagination is corrupted. Overgrown.”
“Was it like this for you? With your... nanny?”
Luna sighed. “I invited Nightmare Moon into my heart at a young age. I nurtured her at first, and as I grew up, she nurtured me. She was kind in a harsh world. And in time, I became dependent on her. I craved her appreciation. And then it was too late. She blurred my mind, choking me until I was lost to the darkness. When I realised what Cadence was going through, four years ago, I vowed not to let that happen to her.”
“But you've failed.”
“I'd like to think that the reason Cadence is still with us today is my intervention. I helped her hide what she's done. Over and over again.” Luna hung her head. “Yes, in the end, I have failed. I could slow it down, and at times, we thought we were making progress. But she kept slipping. She's completely out of my control now. You saw that yourself.”
“You don't have a plan, then?”
“No!” she snapped. “I don't. I've made a mistake.” She looked away, whispering to herself. “Another in a long line.”
She took a deep breath and began ascending the staircase. I walked with her. When we reached the top, Luna only stood there, silently looking at Cadence.
“I don't blame you,” I whispered. “You did what you thought was best.”
“If I could change the past,” Luna said, “I would not protect Cadence. I would tell Celestia right away.”
“What about not allowing her to suffer?”
“I tried, Twilight. I did.”
“Do you think Celestia would have us use the elements, just like that?”
“Four years of Cadence broke my faith. I cannot begin to fathom what I've done to Celestia in a thousand.”
“Consider that you're here now, Luna, and so is Cadence, thanks to you. Perhaps you've made the right decision after all.”
For a second, I thought I saw the shade of a smile appear on Luna's lips. “Perhaps,” she said.
Cadence moaned quietly. Her muscles tensed, and she slowly opened her eyes. For a second her gaze was defocused, but she soon looked us over. She threw her tired head to the side, closing her eyes again.
“Don't look at me,” she groaned.
“I'm here to help,” I said to her. “You just have to let me.”
Cadence made a disgusted expression and waved a half-limp hoof in the air dismissively. “Oh, give me a break,” she said without even looking. “It's always help this, hope that. Luna's been telling me for years, and look where it's brought us. I've lost count how many ponies have died because of me.”
Slowly, she pulled herself up in the throne.
“But it's okay!” she yelled. “It's alright!” She turned to Luna, giving a fake smile. “Because it wasn't really me, was it? It was my imaginary friend. So there's no need to take responsibility for any of it. It's how you've managed to live with yourself, isn't it, Luna?” She spat at her hoof. “Well, that attitude makes me vomit.”
“Cadence, calm down,” Luna said.
“Oh, I'm calm. Never been calmer. You see, thanks to you, I feel no more guilt.”
Her horn lit up, and a sudden gust of wind sent Luna and me tumbling down the stairs. When I looked up, Cadence was balancing on the arms of the throne, two hind legs on one arm, and front hooves on the other. She straightened her back and puffed her chest proudly, looking down at us.
“I can do whatever I want,” she proclaimed, “and I get whatever I want. Because it's not me, get it?” She laughed. “But some other, different Cadence!”
In her eyes, I saw that unnameable sinisterness again. I realised, too, that the small roots that were at the base of the throne had grown. They were now as thick as my torso and lifted the throne from the stairs, spreading in the air like petrified tentacles. Cadence put a hoof on her heart.
“And tonight is my big night,” she said. “Everypony will gather 'round, see I look lovely in my gown.”
Blue light surrounded me, and before I realised, I was floating helplessly towards Cadence.
“And they will get exactly what they asked for. I will give them a party they will never forget.”
I reached Cadence, and she pressed her cheek against mine playfully.
“Maybe tonight I'll get to have what I want as well. I will be happy again.”
She grinned and she rubbed our cheeks together. I tried pushing myself away, but her magic was too strong and held me firm. This wasn't the Cadence I knew, but something vile, something repulsive. I wanted to call her evil, but I couldn't; this mare was something different, radiating only an aura of discomfort and sickness.
“She's not yours to play with!” Luna called out to her. “She's Cadence's friend, and she's here to save her from you.”
“Oh, don't give me that,” Cadence whined.
She threw me angrily at Luna, who in turn caught me with her magic, putting me down gently. I was still disoriented for a while.
“It's exactly what I'm talking about,” Cadence said. “You disgust me.”
The stairs had been completely overgrown by the horrid roots.
Cadence sighed. “But you know what? Maybe you're right. Perhaps I'm not Cadence at all. Not any more. Maybe I should take on a new name, just like you did, Nightmare Moon.”
Thorny vines sprouted from the ceiling above Cadence, and they lashed out at her, cutting into her skin like whips. Cadence grinned; she appeared to enjoy it. The roots have by this time completely consumed the throne and everything to the bottom of the stairs. They sprouted branches, and the branches sprouted leaves, bathing the throne and stairs in a lively green.
“What's happening?” Luna asked. “What are you doing?”
“Do you have any ideas I could use, hmm?” Cadence asked back. “What should my new name be? What am I? What do I do?”
The ceiling sprouted pink flowers, and they glowed bright as they bloomed. More vines descended as well, tangling around Cadence. With each of her breaths, the vines held her tighter until she couldn't breathe.
After a while, I couldn't even see Cadence under the growth. I could, for a few more moments, still make out her vague shape in the statue of vines, but as the wild blooming continued in the room, even that was lost, turning into a shapeless green cocoon.
At once, the vines fell apart, and Cadence wasn't there. Her voice echoed in the overgrown chamber.
“I shall teach all upon this world new ways to love and hate and enjoy themselves, and when I'm done, the world will be consumed in an orgy of fire and passion.”
The flowers on the ceiling began dying one by one, dropping their pink petals to shower the green throne.
“I am the lust that deflowers the purest mind. I am the voice in your head that begs for more when there's no better. I am the blade you drive into your lover's heart once you've had enough. I am not white or black or grey, but something else. I am the crumbling of society, the end of all reason and morality.”
Although there was no wind, the raining petals began whirling around the throne. Slowly, they came together to form a defined shape. Cadence's hooves formed first, but they were cloven, split in the middle. As her legs grew, I saw that her coat was a deep, vivid pink; almost red. Her long mane flowed in the air just like Luna's or Celestia's, and its colours swirled hypnotically within. The white of her eyes turned a sickly yellow and her pupils were slit like a snake's.
She took her place upon the throne and grinned.
“My name is Decadence.”