Trotland reminded me a lot of Skyrim; great green plains with a whole lot of nothing in them. Sure they were beautiful, but we had yet to see what could lead us to Jill and this “treasure”, that of which I had money on it being my brother. Hopefully alive. I leaned against the turning wheel on the top deck, bored out of my mind. Everyone was passing the time in their own way. The zebra recruits were checking all the weapons on deck just like Vito told them. Arige was meditating on the Sheytan’s head. Kitty and Nightheart were teaching Crow how to fly (yeah that surprised me too). Tick and Boom were seeing how long it would take to cook their grenades before tossing them over the railing.
I heard the scared screeching of an eagle and looked up just in time to see Crow land in a safety net Nightheart had made. Crow bounced off the net and hit the deck, laying flat on his stomach. “Fuck flying,” he groaned into the floor.
I snickered. “Oh come on Crow,” I encouraged. “Just keep trying. Besides theres not much to do, so make the most of it,” I complained, vexed at the situation.
Crow got to his paws and brushed himself off and looked over the railing. “Where are we going anyway?”
I shrugged. “I honestly don't know. Ule’s mom said Trotland and here we are. I'm honestly waiting for a big ass explosion or something. Seems to be the only sign that Jill's been in the area,” I groaned.
The sound of a loud explosion sounded in the horizon. Everyone on deck rushed to the right of the ship. Across the plains of green was a dark black plume of smoke arising from a small collection of buildings. “Well I'll be fucked,” I said to myself, astonished.
***
Surprisingly enough, the village wasn't on fire. The town was what you'd expect from a scottish background. Cobblestone streets and brick layered houses lined the streets of the town. Every single one of the buildings had hay domed roofs with iron chimneys protuding out of them. A bigger building the size of a bunker was on fire, explaining the smoke.
What was freaking me out was the fact the entire town was populated by sheep.
Tick, Boom, Crow and I stared at the inhabitants from the Falcon. “What the fuck?” We all whispered.“Take us down Herpy. Lets see what's going on here.” I ordered. Herpy complied with a nod and brought us down to town.
We landed on some barren land close to town, only to be greeted by a welcome party. A crowd of six sheep people approached us, all looking none too pleased. I hopped off the Falcon before it could reach the ground, hair behind my ears. I decided that trust was more important than personal feelings. If they were already angry, I couldn't risk them being even more suspicious of someone hiding their face.
I strolled to the crowd, with my head held high. “Hello citizens! We’re looking for-,”
“Get the fuck out of here!”
I stared at the crowd sheep. “Um, what?”
A sheep bigger than the others stepped forward. His wool was fluffy and he wore a hat that you’d probably find in an amish town. “I said ye need to leave now,” he repeated sternly.
Crow stood beside me and snorted. “And why the hell should we?”
Before anyone could react, the head sheep slapped Crow on the forehead with a shillelagh. Crow went down with a cry and I quickly noticed how opposable the sheep’s hooves were. The head sheep never took his eyes off me. “That's why, ya fooking hamshank!” he yelled with glee. “Ye need to get moving before another twister of trouble hits this rotten place,” he warned.
“What kind of trouble?” Tick chimed in.
Head Sheep shook his head. “What shite isn't heading our way?” He asked himself, pacing back and forth. “We got dragon troubles, our blacksmith nearly blew the town to bloody bits and now we got a madmare running around chasing a legend.”
“Well don't look anywhere else,” I boasted. “We’re some problem solvers.”
He stared at me skeptically. “What cha be, huh? Sellswords? Well I can tell ya right now we aint got no money for ye streetmeats. I suggest ya move on to the next town to start beg’n,” he suggested. This guy was seriously worried for us or himself. So was the rest of the sheep with him. they all wore a look of desperation on their faces, all of them pleading him to let us in.
We were here to investigate so it wasn't like we were giving them charity. “What did this mare look like?” I asked.
The sheep tapped his chin. “Piss yellow fur, blue hair with too much spray jizz in it?”
I almost nodded but then remember that I had only seen my nemesis once in my life. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure thats her,” I answered.
“Then I guess ye be looking for what she was then,” he turned back and nodded to the other sheep, signaling them to disperse. “Come with me and only you,” he ordered sternly.
I turned back to my companions, all of them looking worried. “What's the plan boss?” Crow asked.
I scratched my head. “I’ll follow him I guess. You guys go see what that explosion was and get some supplies while you're at it. I’m pretty sure we’re running low on food.” Tick and Boom shuttered. I've seen them down meat like the rest of the crew but they were obviously uncomfortable.
Crow shrugged. “I’ll stay close by you in case he does anything. He doesn't seem on the up and up to me.”
I would have agreed with him, but something in the old sheeps eyes told me he was hoping I would listen to him. Nodded to my crew members, them getting the message to carry on with their assignments.
***
“We’re going to see the boom! The boomy wizard of BOOM!” Boom sang, skipping through the streets.
The mare was my sister and I loved her, but I swear I wanted to smother her right there. We were wandering through the marketplace of the town in search of the building made the explosion from earlier. Not too hard, considering the fact that the fucker was still smoking.
Going from store to store was starting to get awkward. All the sheep were making glaces at us, muttering words like Sasanach and Wanker, familiar insults for my Trottingham accent. Damn blighters, I thought bitterly.
We were in front of the bunker-like shanty when Boom franticaly rapped her hoof on the door. I facehoofed and an other sheep opened the door. The sheep was completely blue and put my mohawk to shame by shaving all of his wool off on each side of him, turning his entire body into a bloody mohawk. I whistled, impressed. “Dude, nice ‘hawk. Do it yourself?” I asked.
The bald sheep chuckled and took off his soot covered goggles. “Aye and it was a pain in the arse,” he replied, revealing his red eyes. “So what can I do ye for, I'm kind of busy at the moment.”
I nodded. “Yeah, we’re here about that. Your mayor or whatever said, you needed some assistance with defense?”
The blue sheep blinked. “Mayor Shepherd sent ye did he?” he asked, astonished. We both nodded. “Well, come on in then, mind your step. Name’s Big Blue by the way,” he introduced himself, ushering us in.
The inside of the building looked like the Herpy’s workshop on the ship, only difference being the metal pressing machines scattered across the room. One of them was smoking too so theres that. Big Blue led us to the press that was on fire, stopping us before we got too close. “Now, how much do ya know about firearms?” He asked.
Boom and I looked at each other. Honestly, the only time we ever saw a gun was when Idilah used hers. I told the big sheep accordingly and he smiled. “Well as ye don't know, the projectile needs to be ignited to be fired. I’m currently working on a new blasting powder found in common cannon balls, but thats gone to shite. Then I started putting more minerals into the mix and methinks I added just a bit too much,” he admitted with a blush. “Here, let me show ye.”
He guided us over to his workbench, showing us possibly the most beautiful array powders and minerals. Glitterstone, red sand, toniam! All of them volatile and extremely dangerous minerals that if brushed together wrong, could bring the entire village to ashes.
Our mouths watered at the prospect.
I closed my mouth and forcibly closed Boom’s wrapping her drool off my hoof. “By the celestia's wide asscheeks! Where did you get these?”
Big Blue blushed. “Picked it all fresh a few days ago. Been collecting the stuff more frequently since the dragon attacks. We needed something to give us an edge. So I started making guns.”
“Dude, with all this shit here, you could blow the foundations to freaking Canterlot!” Boom chimed in. “Oh, I’m gushing! The things I could do with this stuff!”
I quickly shut my sister's mouth. “I think we could handle the powder. You got a apparatus for us to test the mixes on?”
Blue nodded and dug into a nearby desk. He brought out a black flintlock pistol. The wood on the pistol was polished recently, weathered from age. Compared to the metal though, looked way worse. The metal over the wood was marked with what looked like a knife. Five marks, five kills.
Blue stared at the pistol nostalgically before tossing the pistol to me. “Here, you can use this old thing. Fucker could survive any explosion. Just like the dobber who built it,” he groaned, growing angry.
I caught the pistol in my mouth and put it on the workbench, FAR from the explosives. “Why’d you look at it like that?”
Blue looked sadly down to the floor, as if the question pained him. “Have ya lot ever heard of...”
***
“Who the fuck is the Black Sheep?” I nearly shouted. We were sitting in possibly the most comfy room ever. We were both we sitting in huge cushy chairs right in front of a fireplace. The big sheep, which I now know to be Sheperd (which I find completely friggin hilarious) was smoking a pipe.
He glared at me before blowing a big puff of smoke in my face. “Da Black Sheep, ya mink cunt, is a local legend. He was once a sheep that made iron for a town. Simple stuff; fittings, fashionings for doors and the like for houses. Then he started to make bigger things. Swords, knives, weapons. Claimed it was for the good of the people,” he explained bitterly.
“They turned out to be fooking nightmare! Sheep started killing eachother left and right for “leadership” or some shite! And when he started adding magic to the bloody things, the sheep had enough. They drove him out, kicked his arse to the curb and away from their town to live in peace.”
“Only its not legend is it?” I asked. “Jill doesn't chase after legends unless their true.”
Shepard couldn't meet my eyes. He stared at the fireplace, sadness in his eyes. “No. That “legend” is my son. My idiot, idiot son,” he chanted, rocking back and forth. “He be a brilliant fucker if not so damn arrogant. He and his brothers practically built this town from the brick up. But I warned him not to make the swords, Then I told him not to make the guns. And then fuckers started getting big heads! Want to shoot me out of office just because they could. And when he started lacing magic to the things, I drew the line,” he continued, nearly sobbing.
“He’s an arrogant fuckwit. But I think what sweetmeat might have done to ‘em. The dobber was looking for em and now I keep seeing smoke in the distance. I know thats where me boy went. The little tagger never went far from home.”
Leaned back in the chair, skeptical. “That sounds pretty personal. I’m more worried about these dragon attacks I’ve been hearing about.”
“That be the kicker lass,” he said, wiping his tears. “That dragon makes a run every few days. And when he does come, me boys place goes in smoke.”
“How long has this been going on?”
“A week or so ago. Ever since that piss yellow sweetmeat came look’n for em.”
I got up and brushed off my coat. “I’ve heard enough. I’ll check on your son. But I’m going to need whatever weapons he left behind. I’m a bit naked at the moment,” I admitted, embarrassed.
Shepard’s face didn't change. “Check with my boy in the smok’n building. Blue always admired his brothers inventions,” he said wistfully.
A father worried about his child. And I didn't even need to pay money to see it. I thought walking out the door. Crow was leaning against the house, ear to the wall. “So we’re on another search and rescue quest?” he asked skeptically.
I sighed. “Yeah I guess. Lets get this over with. Herpy’s probably getting-” I was interrupted by another loud bang coming from the same building from earlier. Smoke rose from the same the same spot and the town’s sheep didn't even bat an eye. I sighed again. “Lets go see if they killed anybody yet,” I ordered, waving Crow to follow.
***
“Hey wingmeat! need a cozy for that beak?” hawked a vendor.
I ignored her and heard Idilah giggle. “I think she was telling you to shut up,” she laughed.
I glared back at the vender. “Now that sounds a lot like censorship. Even though I didn't say anything,” I grumbled.
“Oh don't get too offended man. I heard scottish on earth were this rude.”
I snorted. “Like you would know,” I quipped.
“Oh I would. Or I think I would. Dammit,” she swore, stopping and gripping her temples.
I planted a claw on her shoulder, concerned. “You okay?”
She shook her head and kept walking. “Yeah, just my damn head,” she groaned.
It had been a week since picking up Flan, who totally freaked me out. Ever since waking up human again, Idilah had been getting worse. She started slouching more, her eye looking more tired by the day. Whatever kind of magic Nightheart had, he was trying to help her by getting deeper into her head. Every time they experimented though, it always ended with Idilah getting knock-out level headaches. They started carrying over to normal things too, which was starting to worry me.
She always put on a brave face though. Never complained outside her room and the only time she passive aggressively bitched at everyone was when she beat on Ghost, who was always unhappy to oblige. Hopefully this quest for... Her brother’s corpse was going to end soon. Otherwise I didn't think she was going to last long.
We finnaly made it to the bunker building, only to see a new hole appear in the wall in front of me. I ducked and avoided whatever the hell it was that nearly killed me. “Uh,what the fuck was that?”
Idilah calmly knocked and opened the door, ignoring the answer she would had received. Inside Tick, Boom and a punk looking sheep were huddled around a press machine. Inside its grip was a black flintlock pistol pointed in the spot where I nearly got shot.
“Big BOOM!” Boom shouted, clapping her hooves with glee.
Tick saw the annoyed look on my face and glared at his sister. “I told you, we should have waited for them to come in. You nearly shot him!” he shouted at her.
Idilah went straight up to the big blue sheep and glared angrily at him. “You Shepard’s kid?” She asked quickly.
The blue sheep nodded. “Name’s Big Blue lass, what's it to ya?”
Idilah’s glare at him never wavered. Her headache must have come back. “Your father said you could hook me up with some heat?”
Blue stared at her questioningly for a second and then grabbed the flintlock from the machine’s grip. “Here. Its the only thing I have to share that isn't going to blow up. This isnt a gift though. I want it back when you're done with whatever the old sheep gave you to do,” he said sternly.
Idilah ignored him and admired the gun. She twirled the thing in her fingers, smiling. Idilah hadn't had a gun in her hand for days, she was definitely excited. “Anything special about this thing?” She asked.
“Well with the powder we made it should be able to punch through most things. Oh yeah, heres some loaders too,” said quickly, tossing her several packages the looked liked blunts. “Did he just toss you dubies?” I sputtered.
She gave me a flat look. “No, you idiot, they’re powder loaders. Civil war soldiers used them to load their guns faster,” she explain, annoyed at my ignorance.
She slipped them into her pocket and looked back at Tick and Boom, who were busy trying to steal more powder. “Lets go guys. I don't want to be here any longer than we need to,” she ordered bordering no argument.
***
Within an hour we were back on the ship. I had a new gun in my hand and I was happy. Kind of disappointed that it was a single shot though. That was something to get used to.I leaned my back against the railing, admiring the fine piece of work.
Nightheart landed next to me with a suave spin and lit up a cigarette. Where the fuck was he getting those? “Cool piece, who’s is it?” He asked.
I stuck out my tongue and twirled it in my hand. “Sheep blacksmith's Brother. Same one we’re about to go interrogate. Should know some juicy stuff about Jill and should have some fancy things to loot.”
Nightheart stared at me, his eyes full of concern. “You sure you're up for it?” he asked
I shrugged and felt a cough in my throat. “Yeah why?”
“Well...Have you seen yourself? You look sick.”
I shook my head. “I’m fine. You get friendship points for worrying though,” I teased.
Nightheart shrugged flexed his wings. Whatever Steven had done to him, Nightheart was a full blooded dragon now. Flying, breathing fire, going into a male version of heat. The whole nine yards. He smirked coyly “Just friendship points huh?”
I chuckled a bit. “Look at you being bold! Lets finish this quest and we can talk about that situation. Right now I’m sitting on another headache,” I complained, rubbing my temples.
The smirk slowly changed back into a concerned frown. “Did our diggin sessions do that?”
“Yeah... I think so. I can't remember shit, but I know something isn't right in my head. Something deep and my head doesn't want me to get it. Nothing to worry about now. Lets get some food or what's left,” I suggested. With a wave of the hands, Nightheart followed and within a few minutes, we were on the crew deck.
Nobody was in the kitchen area and I could here the rough sounds of sparring in the training room. Vito and Mastodon no doubt. I made my way to the fridge, only to see the remainder of chimera meat. I frowned and noticed the large amount of pink flowers we had left. “Hey Nighty, want some flowers? Its all we got left to eat!” I shouted over my shoulder.
“No need to yell, I’m right behind you,” he replied. His shoulders slouched. “Is that seriously all we got left?”
I nodded, even though he couldn't see it. “Yup. Lets just have this pink stuff salad, leave the meat for everyone else,” I suggested, grabbing two handfuls of pink foliage.
“Aye, aye, captain,” Nighty complied, saluting. He grabbed a stack a plates from a nearby counter and set them on the table. I split the share of veggies and dug a fork in the pile of pink.
The moment the plant touched my lips, I started smelling colors. “Um...,” I uttered, swaying in my chair. “You seeing what I’m seeing man?” I asked Nightheart.
He was in the same way. “Um... What the fuck is going on?” He asked, his voice fluctuating.
We started feeling the air around us. I started to feel the dull colors of room. I could feel the curves of my clothes. I was getting hot! I threw off my coat and watched it catch on fire. “How the hell does that even happen?!” I yelled to Nightheart, who was rolling all over the floor.
With his shorts off.
Yeah...Did not want to see that. But that looked soo fun! I started doing it too and the moment my back touched the floor, I felt the polished wood turn into hard stone. I immediately got back up and stared at the stone floor. “Where the fuck am I?” I asked.
“Idilah!” Yelled Ghost from behind me. I turned around to see Ghost, Nightheart and Crow starring at me with pure awe.
“What?” I asked drunkenly, gripping my head. And nearly smacked myself with the gun I got today, that was fun.
“Idilah, look at what you did!” Crow shouted, pointed behind me. I turned around to see a cave of utter devastation behind me. We were in a cave, a really big cavern. Runic symbols covered the walls, even going as far as covering the ceiling. What really surprised me were the piles of rock covering the ground. I was about to ask what Crow was talking about but then noticed some of the rocks had human features such as abs and muscle definitions to them. Bigger rocks that had chest muscle definitions had holes in them the went clean through.
I stared at the dozens of rock looking bodies and then at the gun in my hand. Did this one little thing done all thing do all this? Did I? I smiled devilishly. “Damn, I’m a badass!” I cheered, jumping. I then noticed two things on my chest jumping with me. I looked down to see my uncovered caramel skin, dozens of pinkish spots almost covering my chest. I covered my shame and turned back to the crowd that was staring at me with bloody noses. “WHY THE BLOODY FUCK AM I NAKED?!?!”
"Oi! Who the fook are you?!" Yelled a voice behind me. I turned around to see a pony with ram horns. His hair was in long dreadlocks tied together behind his head. His flank or I should say his entire leg held runic symbols similar to the ones all over the walls. His eyes were a deep furious red that held a certain pride and demanded a level of respect that I felt strangely familiar with.
"AND WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?!" I yelled at him, still trying to cover myself.
He snorted as if I had somehow insulted him. "Who am I whure? I'm Big-fooking-Blackintosh! And who the fook are yu?!"