//------------------------------// // Nothing Ventured, Nothing Gained // Story: Peewee's Big Adventure // by AbstractThought //------------------------------// Why do these things keep happening to me?! Peewee was flying frantically once again as a familiar threat pursued him. The red dragon from yesterday had caught up with him and was pursuing him relentlessly, growling and shouting vulgar insults like “lame-o!” and “unradical!” all the while. The little phoenix was only able to dodge him at first by weaving around the trees and tree branches, things that the dragon wasn’t too fond of. Even then, the distance was always close, and Peewee wouldn’t have the energy to flee for much longer. I really need a place to hide, Peewee thought as he barely avoided the dragon’s jaws and his jeer of “dork!”. Think, brain, where’s the best place to hide in a forest? I dunno, his brain replied, inside a tree, maybe? Peewee gasped as revelation smacked him upside the head. Of course! No one ever suspects the trees! It’s perfect! Fortunately for him, he noticed a small, inconspicuous hollow close by, so he flashed brightly for a second and, while the dragon was dazed and regretting not bringing his cool sunglasses with him, slipped and snuggled inside the hollow. Yes! I’m a genius! Unfortunately, Peewee didn’t have the luxury of getting to chill his flame-filled birdy body with rest and relaxation, because the dragon then decided to do what dragons do best and just set everything on fire. Including the trees. Including the tree Peewee was in. Including Peewee. Almost. HOT! The little bird shot out of the tree with impressive bullet-like speed as he desperately tried to find another safe haven, but to no avail; the whole forest was ablaze and the dragon was right behind him. It looked like this was the end for Peewee, at least to those who didn’t notice the size of the chapter. Wait a minute! Peewee decided. I’m sick of fleeing from this guy! He needs to know what it feels like! It’s time to FIGHT BACK! With that, there was a brilliant flash, and Peewee was gone once again. “Dweeb-o chicken!” the red dragon bellowed in frustration. “Up here, you…dragon, you!” The dragon looked up and saw Peewee in a fighter jet as he fired a missile directly at him. “Time to go boom boom!” BOOM! Direct hit! “Yay! I won!” Peewee cheered as he turned the jet homeward. “And I can go home a lot faster with this thing! This day just got a lot better!” BOOM! Direct hit on Peewee’s backside! “CHEEP! Or not…” Peewee turned and saw with alarm that the red dragon had gotten a fighter jet somehow and was now hot on his tail. “Egg sucker!” the dragon jeered, another missile heading toward the phoenix’s aircraft to punctuate his insult. Fortunately, Peewee was ready this time and responded with a maneuver so ingenious that he could only have gotten it from video games: a somersault. His jet dodged the missile, he felt the thrill and dizziness of being upside down, and he ended up right behind the incredulous dragon’s jet, the perfect position for him to stuff missiles up his tail pipes. “Time for your daily dose of, uh, blowing up!” Peewee cawed as he mashed the missile button like a particularly hard potato, his whole missile load unloading onto the jet in front of him. BOOM COMBO! The missiles were super effective! “Woohoo! High score!” Peewee celebrated the best way he knew how: doing a bunch of barrel rolls while whistling the song in his head. Sadly, he couldn’t celebrate for long, as the constant spinning made Peewee feel sick to his stomach. Luckily, the jet had barf bags, so the chick was able to puke his guts out without having to muck up his sweet ride. Not so luckily, he discovered too late that he was headed right for a particularly big tree that had somehow managed to not burn to smithereens. Hmm, I wonder what crashing’s like, Peewee thought to himself as he screamed like a girl many times his size. YET ANOTHER BOOM! Well, the tree was certainly burning now. Luckily again, Peewee wasn’t hurt too badly, thanks to his former jet’s state-of-the-art airbags. Huh, that wasn’t so bad, Peewee decided as he lied in the wreckage. Maybe I should wear a helmet next time I fly a jet, though. Ooh, maybe I could wear a helmet that looks like Spike’s head! Then Spike could wear a helmet that looks like my head and it’ll look like we switched heads! It’ll be the coolest thing ever! Peewee’s thoughts were rudely interrupted, though, by the sound of something large, unfriendly, and full of teenage lingo approaching. The little phoenix looked up and saw an enormous aircraft shaped like the red dragon’s head looming over him. “Oh, come on!” Peewee screeched in frustration. “How am I supposed to top that?!” As if to answer his question, a bright beam came from nowhere and struck the draconic faceship, creating a massive explosion that spread over the whole forest and somehow put out all the fires. Because, as everyone knows, explosions fix everything! Peewee stared blankly, his beak agape. “Wow…did I do that?! I AM AWESOME!” “Actually, that would be me,” another voice corrected. “Oh, hello, voice from nowhere!” Peewee greeted casually. “Are you all powerful?” “In this realm, I am.” The source of the voice then revealed herself with a swirl of magic, turning out to be a tall, midnight blue pony with wings, a horn, and a mane that looked like the night sky if it was contained in a satin curtain that was always billowing in a constant wind that didn’t seem to have any source. “Wow, you’re a pony?!” Peewee burst out. “And you’re actually listening to me?! Finally, somepony with manners!” “I am Princess Luna, young phoenix,” the pony introduced herself in a regal tone, “and I can understand you because I am visiting your dream.” “Wait a second,” Peewee said. “The dream thing I can buy, but someone else visiting it? That doesn’t sound right.” “Oh, but it is right,” Luna told him with an air of wisdom that takes a millennium of being trapped inside a celestial body to cultivate. “As princess of the night, it is my duty to watch over the dreams of all creatures and help those in need. That is why I am here tonight, so I can tell you–” “Wait another second,” Peewee interrupted. “If I’m dreaming, I could just be dreaming you, and you’re not visiting my dream after all.” “That is not the case,” Luna insisted. “As I was saying–” “I mean, there’s no real way to prove you’re a dream visitor, is there?” Peewee insisted back. “It does not matter either way,” Luna pressed, impatience seeping into her voice. “What matters is–” “Also, how’s your hair doing that starry waving thing?” “Would you kindly let your princess finish speaking?!” Luna bellowed with a volume that vibrated Peewee’s body almost hard enough to dislocate his feathers. Upon seeing the little phoenix shaking, she took a deep sigh to steady her nerves, and then continued, “Now, as I was saying, I have visited you tonight to tell you–” “Hey, I just noticed, your butt’s all inky!” Peewee pointed out. “What’s up with that?” Luna gave the innocent chick a look that would have frozen him solid if he didn’t have an inner fire. “You know what, forget it,” she decided. “Figure it out on your own.” With that she turned and started to fly off into the distance. “Wait, figure what out?” Peewee called to the fleeing princess. “Is this a brain teaser? Cause my brain doesn’t like those!” “It is too late to beseech my wisdom!” Luna shouted back as the world around them started to swirl and fall apart. “That’s the last time I visit an animal’s dream,” she added under her breath. ---------- Peewee awoke with a metaphorical jolt and a non-metaphorical squawk. The moon was gone, but the sun had yet to peak over the horizon, meaning it was still early enough to get his morning worm. Also, nothing was on fire, which was always a nice bonus. Huh, that was an interesting dream, Peewee reflected as he searched for a worm to chow down on. Was that princess really visiting my dream, or did my brain just make that up? I wonder if I’ll ever see her when I’m awake. Wendell was a worm with a dream: to crawl to the top of the tallest tree in the forest and crawl back down to his home, all in one day. He’d had plenty of practice with other trees, but now he was ready to go for the big one! He had already gotten an early start and was now at the base of the tree in question, which looked a lot taller up close. The tree’s towering height daunted the plucky worm, but he wasn’t one to give up so easily, especially not after all the training he’d gotten. He was going to scale this wooden colossus, and nothing was going to stop him! …Well, except for a hungry phoenix. Such is life. Eh, maybe it’s better if she’s imaginary, Peewee decided as the hapless worm travelled down his gullet. She wasn't very well mannered for a princess, anyway. End of Part 4