//------------------------------// // 11: Enter Parenthood // Story: The Life and Times of Caughlin Mare // by Casca //------------------------------// The extra bed creaked as its inhabitant began to toss and turn, shuddering in spasms. Shining a weak light to guide her path, Caughlin got out of bed and administered the painkiller spell with a gentle touch of her horn. The alicorn loosened up and sighed before falling asleep once more. She glanced at Luna, who was still in peaceful slumber, almost invisible in the murky darkness. The unicorn sighed contentedly and got back into bed to catch a few more hours of rest. As her consciousness drifted, she noted that she didn't even need to be waken up anymore. Tending to Celestia's special needs had become, like so many other activities, part of her routine, one that never ceased to bring a warmth to her heart. Or perhaps it was heartburn - Caughlin had a deep suspicion that she was getting old. Even though she wasn't even past half her lifespan (the average safe-from-chaos pony lived for just over 100 years according to their shoddy but pioneering calculations), she could feel her muscles knotting, and an odd urge to call Whooves "young'un" or some variant thereof. Interesting, she thought, as her horn dimmed down, the room returning to darkness. The first week after the implantation had been one of immense tension. Celestia's frail state could not survive outside of the nutrient chamber until it had grown; she would have to remain in the Laboratory until her organs and senses were strong enough to live in normal conditions. If Discord returned in that period, they could only hope that he did not pass through the guise spell. Furhich had ordered two unicorns to stay on guard at all times behind the illusion in addition to the usual on-shift scientists; should the tyrant approach, and his magic-distorting presence begin to shake the spell, they were to reinforce it with all of their power. The flimsiness of this plan was painful to even think about, and the only thing worse than that was the idea that the R&D ponies couldn't see this. Furhich's memory hex was very competent and largely to blame. Caughlin had spent a few sleepless nights wondering how to deal with Discord such the plan botch itself. Then came one day when the devil himself showed up. It had been a few weeks since they last saw him, and Caughlin was curious as to his state. The peace that had followed his extended absences was uneasy - the previous duration of her life had trained her to expect otherwise. She was grudgingly impressed with the Order's efforts when he arrived in an unceremonious crash - his crow lines were deeper, and his usual smirk had been replaced with a tight, pinched look. The scales on his tail had lost their sheen, and the fur on his body was messy and dirty with ash. Clinging to him was a rank odour of sweat, soured milk and - Caughlin had to restrain her gag reflex when she realized - innards. Not just blood, but organs and their juices and enzymes and waste. The greatest change in him, though, was his demeanor - normally he carried himself with an air of mischievous intent bordering on malice, something that read "I do things for the heck of it". None of that remained. Discord was actually weary for once, and out for blood. He gave a loud sigh, and magicked a couch to fall on. "Bother these rebels," muttered Discord. That was not a good sign, either - Discord had even lost the drive to be witty, succumbing to mere complaining. You're over-thinking things. Caughlin approached, and gave her customary greetings. "Ah, Caughlin. What do I do, I ask you? Confound these ponies, they drive me to... to..." Discord shook his head. "To do everything short of Armageddon! I can't even muster up the energy to rant. Look at me!" sighed Discord. A bag of ice plopped on to his head with a soft crunch. "Why, the way these ponies have been treating me, it's just annoying! Won't they just give up?" "What is it about them that's making it so hard?" asked Caughlin, putting on her best sympathetic voice. If she kept him engaged in a line of conversation, she could keep him from moving to the far end of the den where the guise spell hung. "Hard? Oh, puh-lease," said Discord, sitting up suddenly. He frowned and held Caughlin up to his eyes with a rough grip. She felt a chill fill her belly. "They're absolutely pathetic. Don't go around getting the wrong ideas, miss Caughlin, these ponies pose no problem at all to me." "But I, well, thought that..." "Ah, come on. I'm just playing with them. But it's becoming an extremely boring game." Discord put her down and summoned up a bag with "Peanuts" labelled in large, balloon-y letters. "Do you know what they do, Caughlin? They find me and launch spells. It's aggravation, that's what it is. So I think, 'Well, I'll amuse them', and so I give chase. They try to run through crowds, hide in villages and the like. I destroy everything. Everything, mind you, except for the debris, because that would be pointless. And they teleport here and there, and leave little changes in the thaumical flux. As if it bothers me at all! Pah! I gain on them slowly until I've got them. Then I eat them." Caughlin froze in a stare. "Oh, yes, Caughlin," continued Discord, munching on peanuts by the handful now. "But not raw, mind you. This one time I made muffins out of them." He began to hum as if it were the most regular thing in the world. "You know, all you have to do is take a cup of flour. Add it to the mix. Then take a little something sweet and sour. A little bit, perhaps a pinch. Not that you ponies can pinch with hooves, of course, but still. A little salt, and then the pony. It's a cinch, really, though you can never get your fill with desserts. Never stays in your belly, always goes to your thighs... Or was that cupcakes? I can't tell for the life of me what the difference is." He stopped and glanced at Caughlin, who had blanked out her expression completely. He snorted and laughed, spraying bits of peanut shell all over her. He rolled his eyes and dusted her off with a featherduster, pulled out from nowhere. "I'm just kidding, Caughlin. You silly mare. Ponies taste horrible, nor do they go well with my digestive system. No, I just kill them. Simple as that." He ran a talon slowly along her throat. "Sometimes I do it fast, sometimes slow. Not that it matters, since they can't hurt me. Just depends on my mood. Which, come to think of it, has lightened considerably since coming back here." A wide, toothy grin stretched across his face. "The wonderful feeling of being in total control is so cathartic. You should give it a try. Probably have, I'm sure, you rascal." He gave a tired stretch. "If I go on at this rate you'll be the only ponies left in Equestria. I'd better lay off the hunting for a few days. Maybe make time spin a little faster so that they can re-populate. Appreciating chaos is not as fun when you're alone, after all." With a flick of his tail, peanuts, couch and Discord disappeared, and she plopped down to the ground hard. "Whooves?" she asked quietly, not moving from her spot. "Yes, Caughlin," replied the stallion anxiously. "What is it?" "Where is Luna?" "I hid her as soon as he popped in. She didn't hear a word of it." "Good. Good." Caughlin then turned to Furhich, who had been silently watching. She trotted up to him, eyes cold. "Those were your men, Furhich, acting under your orders. I'm curious as to what you thought of that exchange." "That they died as heroes, for you, for us, for Equestria," replied Furhich, matching her glare. "For Celestia. Nor do you have any authority over them - as much as you are chairpony of the R&D, I am the leader of the Order. I appreciate your concern. The deaths of our comrades was certain, and we do our best to get over it, but hearing it from the killer himself is not easy, I assure you." He faltered, an uncertainty in his voice. "We feel it for sure. The loss is painful. But it isn't unexpected - they knew what they were to do, and the result of it. Everypony in the Order is ready to throw themselves into the fires of hell for freedom. We need to remove Discord. And the only way we can do it is through Project ALICORN." "Do you really think that more power is the only way?" asked Caughlin. "What else can we obtain to defeat such a being?" answered Furhich simply. Due to Celestia's rapid maturation, within a week she could see, hear and recognize shapes. They took her out of the chamber for a tentative physiological trial; in two days, she had learnt to stand, and in another two days, walk. Measurements showed a triple increase in weight, and quadruple in height within the week. It was unnatural. But for Caughlin, who had a supervising role, it was a source of pride all the same - the foal was alive and growing and learning. She was not sure whether the term "healthy" applied in this context, though. That was when the scientists took her away. Caughlin knew that it was for the best. They had the necessary painkillers - the R&D's own drugs were far too weak to have the required effect - and the staff to deliver it regularly. Despite the various hazards overhead, the Order possessed a few precious pieces of equipment to perform their own monitoring work vital to keeping Celestia's experimental rates safe. Most importantly, Celestia would be safe from Discord. Even so, it was not without pain that Caughlin said goodbye to Celestia. It had been only month, a month and a half. Who knew when she might see her again? "Take care, Celestia. I'm going to miss you," said Caughlin, hugging the foal gently. "Luna, say bye to your sister." "Why?" asked Luna. "Why can't Celestia stay?" "Because she... needs to be somewhere else, Luna. This place isn't right for her," said Caughlin, carefully choosing her words. If I said that it was for her safety Luna might feel scared and want to leave too... I don't know what I'd do if that happened. "Then how will she see Mommy and Whooves and me?" persisted Luna, pulling at Caughlin's mane. "She won't," said Caughlin, biting her lip. She felt her eyes water. Get a grip on yourself, Caughlin. Not in front of the foals. And Furhich. "Mommy," said Celestia, looking up expressionless, to everyone's shock. "Yes," stammered Caughlin, nuzzling the white alicorn for the last time. "That's me all right. Now you be good, Celestia. Be good. And don't forget us." "What she said," said Whooves, giving Caughlin a sideways hug. She felt him tremble slightly. "Take care, Celestia. I don't know you very well. But I wish I did. If I get the chance then I will, okay? Uhh. Dang. Forget the 'uhh' part, will you?" Caughlin drew him closer and gave him a squeeze across the shoulders. The Order's transport ponies gave them a terse nod, held Celestia's hooves and vanished into the world above. Caughlin had spent the subsequent week in a slump. She was worried for Celestia and frustrated at herself for many things. Somehow, it was in the settling of the moment that she remembered how un-hexed she must have sounded over the past few days. The intelligence, the snarky replies, the bold challenge... I really hope Furhich attributes all of that to my vibrant, dynamic personality, thought Caughlin, rolling her eyes inwardly. She would have to stay in-character from now on. There were also her extended absences from the rest of the R&D team. Phase two of Project ALICORN involved decidedly less of them, so they had returned to their original work for the most part. Caughlin had been left remaining on the roster. They didn't blame her or think any less of her for it, as if she had betrayed them to work on the far more glamorous project. It would be an insult, she felt, to think any less of her team's empathy. That didn't stop the guilt. She could see them glance through the guise during that month every so often with mixed looks - never hurtful, but quite often hurt, or so it looked - well, there would be no more of that, because Celestia was gone from their lives until further notice. The Order had scrapped the nutrient chamber within a day, and had dismounted the guise spell on the next. She spent a couple of afternoons showing Luna her reality bubbles, and attempted to explain to her the thaumatical principles behind it. One day, Luna took Gummy out for a walk around the den - or rather, Luna took a walk around the den while Gummy watched. They had no leash for her to use, so Luna's only coax was verbal. Fed up with the lack of response, the alicorn huffily gave Gummy a poke in the eyes, as she had seen Caughlin do a few times before. To her shock, Gummy reared up and let loose a column of fire, and from it came a scroll. Caughlin picked up Luna's squeals across the den and quickly took the letter up. "Oh, Luna!" exclaimed Caughlin, lifting her in a hug. "This is great news! Whooves, go and get me some paper and a pen! Your sister's coming back to visit in two days!" The letter read: To: Caughlin Mare of the R&D Department Greetings. We request that preparations be made for the second alicorn Celestia's visit to the Laboratory. After one week of dwelling in Order conditions, she has stated firmly her desire to return to your place. We know that this is extremely risky, however, for the sake of her emotional health we are willing to discuss a compromise. Previous measures remain, most important being Celestia's confinement to a private room. Further discussions regarding this will be held in good time. We will arrive in two days of your reply. On the day itself, please send another signal (blank) message via dragonfire, and we will take it as a safe indicator to enter. Expect us within five minutes of your signal. That had been six years ago. From then on, their routine had been the same - Celestia dropped in every alternate week, spending one above and one below. She simply wasn't happy living with the Order to the point that she had refused meals for days. She didn't want to think that it was family instincts or her love winning over. There was no scientific basis for that. Even Furhich could not change her insistence on returning, such stubbornness she showed. But she felt as if it were. Something finally turning her way for a change. Caughlin wasn't going to question it - she was just glad that they got to see her again. Luna had taken a great liking to her sister, thankfully, and it warmed her heart to watch them play and study together. Even so, there were parts of the arrangement that she could not stand, and one of those parts was the things the Order were teaching Celestia - things, Caughlin suspected, straight out of Furhich's book. "What does my name mean?" asked Celestia one night, as they settled in after a long day of levitation practice. The days of snuggling together in the same bed had long past - three beds along with the alicorns' study materials meant that the room was more cramped than before - but the usual bedtime stories still remained. Caughlin had a repertoire of these from PEEP books, many of which came with morals, something she was intent on passing on to the alicorns. "It's Old Pony for the sun. And Luna is Old Pony for the moon," answered Caughlin, searching her memory for a story that the alicorns hadn't heard a million times already, as she had done for the past year. "That's nice. It also fits funnily, 'cos I'm a midnight blue and you're bright white, sis. And what's your name mean, Mommy?" chipped in Luna. "I... honestly have no idea," admitted Caughlin. "I never got the chance to ask them. Caughlin Mare. Hmm. Well at least we know what 'mare' means, though I suppose it'd be awkward for everypony if I had turned out a stallion." "While we're at it, what about Whooves' name? I doubt that it refers to his, well, hooves," noted Celestia. "It's odd, really. From most of your stories, ponies have names like Butter Cup, Blossom, that other blue pony with the blond mane whose name I can't remember. Blue Grass the travelling musician. I've also gathered that most conventional surnames stem from a characteristic of the family in ancient times - something-Apple, something-Silver, adjective-noun. I mean no disrespect, Mother, but everypony in this room seems to have unconventional names. Not that I don't like them, of course, I think Luna has a nice touch to it. And mine sounds regal, which is nice too," she added hastily. Caughlin frowned. Fair point. "I think it's because back then, in the ancient days, ponies lived in peace, or at least without chaos. So they could call each other nice names like flowers and, er, bugs and things. These days - Luna, you wouldn't know, but Celestia knows what I'm talking about - cheery names don't really fit into the world we live in, don't you agree? It's almost ironic if you were a, say, Willow Tree living in the barren lands of Stalliongrad. Names like mine and Whooves just fit in today's twisted world, I guess." "How was it like in days of peace?" asked Luna. "Was it really like in the books? Where plants grew normally and the skies were blue, and sometimes there weren't even clouds?" "I wouldn't know." Since when did they become so interested in ancient history? "I can tell you, though, that peace and order did, and still do exist. The world has the potential to live in harmony." With your aid, thought Caughlin quietly. "Harmony must be very nice then. What's harmony?" continued Luna. "Well..." This was a difficult question. Caughlin gave it some thought, and considered whether to conveniently call it a night. Then inspiration struck her. "Harmony is an abstract thing, sister," said Celestia. "It's an absence of chaos. You can't describe something like that." "No, that's not quite right." Caughlin felt confident of her answer as she continued. "Harmony is something more. You could say it's made of... of elements, yes. Just like pyridine and hexane. There's, mmm, honesty, for example. If ponies were lying to each other there wouldn't be harmony, would there? And then there's loyalty, because when you trust somepony you feel much better doing things with them. Maybe laughter - " She suddenly remembered what Whooves had said back then about her laugh, and felt her ears warm - "because it's a sign of happiness. Generosity, being willing to share with others who need it. You've probably seen that at work in the Order, Celly." I hope. "And kindness, because it's amazing what a little bit of care can do to somepony." Like what the R&D team and old Macquarie Pie did for me. Caughlin counted them up. "Yep, five elements. The elements of harmony." Celestia did not seem satisfied with it. "How about magic? The Order ponies say that power is the most important thing to bring peace to Equestria, and magic is power." "Magic is magic," dismissed Caughlin sternly. "You can have harmony without magic - it isn't a matter of thaumics, it's a matter of your personality, who you are." "But they argue that magic is necessary to defeat Discord!" "That's true," relented Caughlin. "But again, harmony isn't an absence of chaos. Defeating Discord isn't enough for harmony, though it would certainly bring it a lot closer. But we have a bit of it here, don't we? It's when ponies get along, and live together in peace. Simply taking away chaos doesn't mean that they'll get along. Besides, if magic is so important, where does that leave Earth ponies and Pegasi?" "They say that uncle Furhich's an advocate of 'unicorn supremacy'," confessed Celestia, shrinking under the covers. "He's even written a book on it. It's a theoretical governing model with unicorn nobles and an enriched farming class. I mean, I may have read some of it..." "Celestia." Caughlin sat up, biting her lip. "Listen to me, Celestia Mare. Uncle Furhich can believe what he likes. But you're my foal, and you do what I tell you to - you get that junk out of your head. Unicorn supremacy is corrupt and selfish and has no place in Equestria." She sighed. "Celly... you haven't done anything wrong. But I want you to focus - Luna, you too - and remember now that all ponies are equal. Everypony is to be treated fairly, regardless of how they look or what characteristics they bear, because each have their special gifts and talents. We have to rely on each other to make the best progress. How would you like it if ponies bullied you for being different? And you're not allowed to hex or harm them in retaliation." "I wouldn't like it," mumbled Celestia. "And would you look at me any differently, or love me less if I somehow became an Earth pony, or a pegasus?" "No, Mother, no!" cried the alicorn fervently. There were tears forming in her eyes. "Never!" "Mmm," soothed Caughlin, magicking a handkerchief over to wipe her face. "It's okay, Celly. It's not your fault. I just want to be firm on that, because it's so important. Come on, stop crying. Luna, turn off the light please. We all need sleep. Tomorrow we're going to try out a triune, isn't that exciting? Us three, one spell! But you have to rest up, now..." She sat up, her thoughts waking her up once more. She could hear Luna's soft breathing, and Celestia's tighter gasps that she had almost learnt to get used to. These were more than projects. These were her foals, and even though they were growing up fast - in the latter's case, literally so - they would probably still be that in her heart regardless of what happened from then on. They had enjoyed around six years of harmony. But she could feel a nagging sense that it was about to come to an end. Like her bubbles, the dream would pop, and all that would be left was hard reality.