//------------------------------//
// New Day 1:The Free-est of Falls 
// Story: PonyFall:Adventures in Chaos 
// by Draequine 
//------------------------------//

Hello Reader!

If you have been reading these letters in the right order, Discord had just finished telling me his side of the making of Equestria. Whenever it actually happened or not, I’ll leave it to you to decide. Now, back to the part where I was falling off of the Empire State Building.

You know that feeling you get when you tilt your chair back a bit too far and get that nagging sense that you are teetering on some unseen abyss? This was nothing like that.





The fall had started with me giving a fascinated whistle at the view from New York’s famous landmark, the Empire State Building.  Said whistle quickly became a dry whimper when I realized I was parallel to said famous landmark, and about one hundred and two floors higher than I would have liked.

I’m not too proud to deny that I screamed like a baby, curling into a ball as I anticipated the splat to come.

~Won’t be too long now~ Crazy Voice cheerfully notified me. ~You won’t even make it past the 88th floor~

I was much too terrified to acknowledge Crazy Voice with anything but more yelling. I was so busy screaming my head off, that I hadn’t noticed I wasn’t dead yet.

~Any second now...~ Crazy Voice doubtfully remarked. 

I finally stopped screaming, calmly took a deep breath, and began screaming again.

I screamed my lungs out a few more times before noticing a distinct lack of pavement. 

And wind. There wasn’t any wind either. Not even a stiff breeze to accompany my plummet, which turned out to not be a plummet at all. Just an incredibly slow descent. For once I was unimpressed. Disappointed even! When Discord and I found out that he had his powers back, I was expecting him to do something really bizarre, like turn New York into a giant snow globe. This was nothing compared to being a dingo. Of course I felt weird just hovering beside the Empire state building, but that was mostly the blood rushing to my head.

That was, until the pigeons showed up. They had come one by one like dirty little harbingers of grief and misery, cooing and flapping as they perched on my shoulders and back. The head pigeon, and I knew it was the boss of this group from where it was positioned, namely the top of my head, was wearing a little bowler cap which told me all I needed to know.

Damn it, Discord!





I’ll pass on writing anymore about what happened with the pigeons for now, maybe the next letter.





I cleared my throat before saying, “Alright, real funny Discord. Mind putting me...” I cringed when I realized what I was just about to say. I turned my head to see the ground again.

~Oh please, finish that sentence.~

“Put you where, Ashton?” I heard Discord’s voice from the building.

He’s the building isn’t he? I had thought to myself, terrified to look back at the landmark and see his face looming over me, larger than life. Looming over most of the city. The mental image mutated into something even more frightful. What will happen when the world becomes truly aware of him? What will happen to me?

~Ooooh! It gives me shivers just thinking about that!~ Crazy voice happily remarked at my panic.

“Hello? Anybody in there?” the Spirit of Chaos asked as he jabbed the back of my head with a stapler.

Buildings can’t use staplers! I deduced with relief.

Crazy voice had some sort of retort, but I was too busy awkwardly worming around into position to see Discord, who was hanging out one of the windows above me. What he was wearing would have floored me, had I not, you know, been several dozens of floors above the ground and all. He was looking down on me through a pair of brown, horn-rimmed glasses, and from what I could tell, was wearing a tacky, white-collar blue shirt. For once his outfit was completely in context with the setting. It was so bizarre in that it wasn’t bizarre at all.

I coughed into my fist, thinking of a way to phrase my next sentence in a way that wouldn’t result in me becoming a stain on the ground. Several seconds of frantic thinking later, I was thoroughly depressed. I couldn’t think of a single request that Discord couldn’t twist into a bad end for me.





Of course, thinking back on it now a week later, I could have said plenty of things. 

“Hey Discord, mind letting me in?” 

I could have been polite, of course.

“Can I please come in?”

or

“Let me into the building please?”

But what I should have said was,” Please, please, please do not kill me!” as I soiled myself.

I attribute my general absence of reaction to the lack of oxygen due to being several stories above the streets of New York.

Anyhow, I doubt that any of those would have really worked, since he would have still done this.





Discord looked past me and whistled. “You humans are quite the busy bodies aren’t you? Scurrying around in your cars, and doing your jobs... How boring.” He looked back at me, “Except for you, of course. You’re just floating there like a bum!” He sneered and continued. “While you’ve been lollygagging, I’ve been making new friends.”

I was just coherent enough to see where this conversation was heading. Discord was done with me. I was terrified, and strangely, I felt betrayed. 

“I’d like you to meet Bob.” Discord yanked someone to the window. He was a gray faced man with brown hair, wearing the same shirt as Discord. “Susan.” He brought someone else to the window. It was a blonde, gray faced woman, also wearing a white shirt. “And Stephano.” He brought the final ‘friend’ to the window. “Wave at Ashton now everyone!” Discord cheerfully said to the three.

They listlessly waved at me while staring ahead of them. 

Something seems odd about those three, I thought to myself.

~I’ll give you a hint. It rhymes with Discord screwed with their minds.~ The other voice in my head snarked.

What does that rhyme wi- Oh. Wait, that can’t be it, can it? They look like regular office workers to me. Although, there aren’t many differences between a Discorded pony and a cubicle jockey, is there? I thought further about it. Doesn’t Discord just alter personalities? He never turned any pony into a zombie did he?

~Do I even need to be here?~ complained Crazy Voice. ~Quit talking to yourself!~

“They are rather helpful, they tell me what I want to know, and they don’t talk back.” Discord glared at me. “Unlike you.” He gave a sniff and covered his eyes with one of his hands , “So this is where we part ways Ashton,” He gave a smile and removed his hand, “but feel free to hang around.” 

I heard a loud pop and suddenly I was surrounded by thick white smoke. I noticed two other things as well. One, my hands were firmly clenched around something rough, and vaguely rope-like. Two, I was feeling that certain full-body tug commonly referred to as gravity start to pull me down. I would have begun screaming again, but my throat was so raw from yelling a few minutes ago that the best I could do was yelp.

I had drawn myself as close as I could around my lifeline, and resolved not to look up. I wanted to be blissfully unaware of what my rope was actually attached to. I was trying to think of how I could get out of this mess when a stiff breeze knocked me against the building. I gave another miserable yelp, and held even tighter.

In a moment of clarity I realized that all I could do was appeal to Discord’s better nature. Then I gave a shrill laugh and collided with the wall again. 

I’m obviously in hysterics. Discord doesn’t have a better nature, he is a vain, selfish, chaotic thing, who is only concerned with himself, I thought bitterly to myself. I should know, after all I’ve been with him for a full week! I know him more than he knows me now, since he got amnesia for some reason.

It finally dawned on me. “Wait! Discord!” I struggled to shout. “They don’t know what you did last week!”

“I suppose they don’t,” Discord said above me. “But that doesn’t really matter, I’ll just see it for myself.” It had completely slipped my mind that Discord was quite capable of time travel.

I whimpered, assuming that he had officially decided to leave me to die. I had felt another gust of wind blow onto me, pushing me farther from the building and closer to the intense air currents swirling around the skyscraper. My head started throbbing and everything came into focus. As the wind roared around me I saw the mortar between the bricks rushing to meet me.





I may be exaggerating a tad here. I had my eyes closed and cried like a baby the whole time I was being whipped around in the air like a flag.





Then I felt something yank the rope, and over the howling wind I somehow heard Discord whisper into my ear, “Actually, a stroll through memory lane isn’t fun without company.” 

After hearing a faint snip, I had only enough time for one more thought before the rope went completely slack and my plummet would really begin.

Eauuuugh! It was something of a mixture between a moan and a sob, and had continued into the fall until I had suddenly stopped falling. Then it was replaced by a timid huh? as I registered that I was laying on something solid, and, as far as I knew, that I was still alive.

“Quit being so dramatic,” I had heard Discord gleefully remark. “For something that looks just like a balding monkey, you have a remarkable fear of heights.”

I was too busy gasping for air to come up with one of my ever so witty retorts. What I had done however was open my eyes. It had appeared that I was laying in middle of a hallway. An impossibly long hallway, with doors upon doors. Doors on the walls, on the ceiling, on the floor, and everywhere in between. It was like being in a transparent M.C Escher painting hanging between two mirrors.

I had somehow managed to catch my breath and sat up. “Where am I?” I had said, unable to keep the awe out of my voice. I had given a few frantic looks around me at all the many different doors to see if I could see Discord. That was when I noticed something else about this strange place I was in. No matter where I had looked, I would still be staring straight down a hallway. If I were to describe it right then, I would have related it to a disorganized flipbook being flipped just slow enough to notice each image. It was disorienting to say the least.

I had then made the terrible mistake of looking directly at my feet. Thankfully I had the good sense to close my eyes before I would start falling again. I had taken the time to think about this as my breathing had finally started to normalize.

Okay, I’ve had enough. How am I going to get out of here? I asked myself.

~You’re doing it again.~ Crazy voice had chimed in annoyed. ~Why don’t you take a look inside one of those doors?~

I had briefly contemplated scrambling around with my eyes closed, on the off chance that this impossible place had friction that I could use to walk with, and fumble my hands around until they could find a knob or handle.  

But then my thoughts turned to about what could be behind these doors. 

I had then quickly decided that this wasn’t by far the worst place I could be in. That wasn’t to say that this was a great place to spend the rest of my life in, so I opened my eyes again to get a better look. In a surprising moment of courage I took a peek at my feet again. I was staring into the center of a hallway again, but I was also staring at my feet. Feet which were connected to my legs which were, last time I checked, connected to me.

I was pretty sure I should have been falling but I wasn’t.





I’m finding it pretty hard to write how mind boggling this was, so I’m just going to answer a few questions I think you might have right now.

No, it wasn’t a weightless environment.

Yes, I know I should have realized I was supposed to be falling the moment I opened my eyes to see that I was laying on my back in the center of an endless hallway, but in case you haven’t noticed, I’m a bit slow on the uptake.

As for the walls of the hallways, they had appeared solid. It wasn’t like I could really check them since, as I have written before, I was Always in the center of a corridor. 

Back to recounting.





I had eventually gotten a grip of myself and stood up. What I was standing on however, I’ll never know. 


I wasn’t sure what to do next, so I walked. At least, I thought I was walking. I was sure the doors I was walking toward were getting closer, but wasn’t hearing my foot steps, It didn’t feel like I was moving, and I felt, well, I felt hollow.  I had made an attempt not get too close to any of the doors, but every time I tried to move in an direction other than down the hall everything would shift.

Every couple of seconds I would be looking at a new set of doors in new positions, no matter how hard I tried to not blink, turn, or look away. I had to find some way to gain my bearings. 

So I attempted a few tests. First I tried to find the same hall twice. Completely impossible, so I had decided that doing tests here was a waste of time and just went back to walking.

Eventually, curiosity had gotten the best of me. I was beside one of the doors, From what I saw in the preprial of my vision, it was a metal cabinet. My hand “accidentally” firmly grasped the handle. It was then I heard something on the other side of the door.  It was a scream.

I had almost let go, but something about that scream was so familiar. I tried to listen, but all I could make out was muffled talking

“Calm down Ra----- we are just ----- nothing too ---- Just vampires. If worse ----...

That was when I opened wide the door.

“Try again,” Finished the stranger.

It was a small, dark room. I wasn’t able to make out much about the two figures in the gloom. One of them, a girl I thought, was hyperventilating. The other was leaning against the door gasping for air.

“You brute!” The mysterious lady had exclaimed.

“I’m more of a cur. I’m much too scrawny to be brute.” The man had self-deprevationally replied.

“Just let me find the light, alright?” 

I ought to go, I had thought to myself, but I didn’t go because these two were much too familiar.

And so the light was turned on. I saw a lady with deep purple hair wearing a fantastic dress, and myself, wearing a tuxedo.





I’ll think I’ll end the note here. My hand is getting cramps.

Okay,  it’s not hurting at all. I just enjoy making suspense.

Ashton Thomas











Authors note: In the event that you check the chapter list to see if I had slipped in a chapter featuring Discords recounting of Heartwarming eve, I just want to say that these letters don’t need to come in any particular order. After all, Ashton seldom knows what he is doing.

Also, HA HA, MADE YOU LOOK!