//------------------------------//
// Meet the Pyro: A Killer Unmasked (Part II) 
// Story: Meet the Team: Pony Fortress 2 
// by The Usurper 
//------------------------------//

"Then I opened my eyes, and the nightmare was me!"

- Rasputin (Anastasia)





"Yes." The Administrator stroked his beard thoughtfully. "About her..."

"We're going to need all the ponies we can get." Ician paused to take a sip of his chocolate milk. "The BLU Pyro and RED Sniper are our best combat-ready mercenaries and we can't afford to lose either of them."

"Uh... yes."

Ician's eyes narrowed. "Are you hiding something?"

"Nothing... that you need to know yet."

"Administrator-"

"Relax. It won't affect this infestation at all."

"I'm not going to continue unless you tell me what's going on." Ician crossed his hooves.

"Really?"

"Really."

"Ugh... fine." The Administrator sighed. "I may as well start from the beginning."

"The beginning?"

"Yes, the beginning."

"Right. So are we talking about the formation of the world, Equestria's foundation, the First Civil War-"

"No. I'm talking about the beginning of this story."

Ician frowned  "This story?"

"Isn't it obvious?" The Administrator waved his paw nonchalantly. "The interviews."

"The- oh." He evinced confusion. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Everything."

"..."

"What?"

"Are you going to elaborate?"

"You only had to ask."

Ician facehooved. "Let's just get this over with..."





"Oh." At the far end of the room, Applejack lowered her Wrangler. "It's just Diana."

"Thank goodness." To Diana's right, Fluttershy let her syringe gun fall to the floor with a sigh of relief.

"Sorry for the abrupt entrance, but..." Diana risked a glance behind her into the thankfully empty stairwell. "... honestly, I'm not entirely sure what could be chasing me, but I have a pretty good idea."

"Come in quickly, then." Rarity urged. As soon as Diana stepped forward, her horn ignited and pushed the door shut with a click.

"So... you were all waiting for me here the whole time?"

"If you mean since noon, then yes." Twilight, her right hoof hanging out of the open window at the far end of the room, did an acceptable job of hiding her displeasure. "Where were you?"

"Being shoved around by an... apparently uninvited guest."

Rainbow snorted. "Well that's very- ouch." Wincing in pain, she clutched her heart with her right hoof, dropping her Scattergun.

"Don't move too much." Twilight reminded her, trotting over to give her a helping hoof. "I told you that the effects of the reanimation spell might take a few days to fade."

"It's already been a few days." Rainbow snapped.

"It's barely been two." Twilight shot back. "Besides, you're not going to get well any sooner if you don't stop moving around."

"And what am I supposed to do when I'm not moving around?"

"You could always read a book. There's a shelf full of interesting stories in the Adventure section of the Canterlot Royal Library."

"I'm not reading anything unless it's the next Daring Do book." Rainbow crossed her hooves defiantly.

"Sometimes, Rainbow, you're really-"

"Wait, wait. Hold on for a second." Diana, who had been only half-paying attention to the exchange, finally processed what Twilight had said earlier. "A... reanimation spell?"

"Yes." Twilight looked at her quizzically. "It's when a dead pony is revived using immense amounts of magic, usually conducted in controlled environments like hospitals. You don't know what it is?"

"I know what it is, but you do know that we have respawn points for a reason, right?"

"We haven't figured out why, but hers wasn't working."

"Uh... any informed guesses?"

"Well, the fact that we had to sneak all the parts of her body out of the BLU Medic's refrigerator speaks for itself, really."

"So... how long has she been missing?"

"Ever since her interview." Twilight shrugged. "The BLU Spy's been masquerading as her soon after she died to avoid arousing our suspicion, but obviously she isn't going to tell us how long she's been there."

"... Oh."

"We only found out after your interview with Rarity," Twilight nodded at the Spy, who gave a slight bow out of habit, "and since then we've managed to track down and liberate her body."

"Wow... It's been only, what, two days? That was a fast infiltration mission."

"The BLU Spy isn't the only skilled saboteur around here, darling." Rarity flashed her a quick smile. "Besides, they're hardly liable to concentrate their defenses around the refrigerator of all places."

"Good point." Diana acknowledged.

"Either way, I actually had a legitimate excuse to go there yesterday. The Administrator wanted to return my pet cat."

"Return your... pet cat?"

"Mmhm. Opal had been gone for a while, I'd no idea where she went, but apparently she managed to somehow wander into the Administrator's base. She's safe and sound now."

"I see." Pausing, she put a hoof to her chin. "Wait, we're supposed to be talking about the Pyro."

"What, can't handle some idle talk?" Rarity joked.

"I wish I could." Diana said. "But if I don't finish this as fast as I can the Administrator's going to ask me what I was doing, and I don't think he'll accept 'idle talk' as an valid excuse."

Twilight shrugged. "That sounds completely like him, to be honest."

Diana looked around. "So, who wants to go first?"

"I will." Rainbow volunteered eagerly.

"Okay, go ahead." A quick flick of her hooves and her pencil was in the air, poised to begin its work. "First question: How do you feel about the Pyro?"

"Oh, she's fine. She's really fun; I mean, she throws parties for everypony and makes sure that we're having the time of our lives when we're off duty, but..." She sighed. "... Really, I hate to admit it, but I like - or used to, at least - the BLU Pinkie more."

"Rainbow!" Twilight snapped. "Not in front of his interviewer!"

"What's wrong with that?" The pegasus retorted. "Zecora told her about her own friendship with the BLU Soldier too!"

"And look where that's got them." Twilight countered. "Besides, the only reason why Zecora even went and befriended the Soldier was because we evidently didn't do a good enough job of befriending her ourselves!"

"So what? Does that mean I can't make friends on the other team?"

"You won't have those friends anymore," Twilight said quietly, "if the Administrator finds out."

"Don't worry, Twi, it's fine." The pegasus smiled confidently. "She knows when to keep quiet about things now, don't you, Diana?"

Out of the corner of her eye, Diana caught sight of Twilight's meaningful stare, and cleared her throat. "You can trust me. Look." Releasing her grip on the notepad and pencil, she stepped forward bare-hooved. "Nothing you say here is going to go out of this room. Tell me as a friend, not an interviewer."

Rainbow's grin reinforced itself on her face. "I knew I could trust you."

"You always could." Diana returned the smile with one of her own. "So, you were saying?"

"Yeah... about Pinkie."

"Yes. What is it about her you find more interesting than your own Pyro?" Diana glanced sideways. Twilight's still looking at me with that distrustful gaze... what's she thinking?

As if she had heard her thoughts, the unicorn's expression morphed into a contemplative frown. I can't tell if that's good or bad...

"I don't really know what it is, but I just feel more... comfortable around her." Rainbow's voice snapped Diana out of her thoughts. "I mean, it feels like she understands me, you know?"

"I know the feeling, yes."

"When we were off duty, we'd go pranking everypony. I laughed so hard when she managed to pull of one of her impossibly complicated plans. The look on their faces were priceless!" For a moment Rainbow's eyes glazed over, images of water balloons and Poison Joke dancing before her eyes. A wistful smile broke out on her lips.

"You didn't go too far, did you?" Diana asked concernedly.

"Huh?" Rainbow's mind was abruptly dragged back to reality. "Oh, of course not. It's all just in good fun. She's managed to get smiles out of the pranked too."

"That's good to know." Diana took a brief look at Twilight. The frown was still there. "But surely that wasn't it, right? There has to be more."

"Oh, a lot more, trust me." Rainbow laughed. "Sit back; this is gonna be a long story."





"Everything," The Administrator said, "and I mean everything, started about a month ago."

"A month..." Ician mused. "It was that incident, right? The one with the unstoppable sentry?"

"That one." He confirmed. "Back then we were facing a few... how shall I say it... problems..."

"Of what kind?"

"Insubordination."

"So who was on the receiving end of your punishment?"

"My punishment?" The Administrator chuckled. "Oh no. Nothing of the sort. The BLU Pyro's far too precious for me to punish."

"It's hard to justify exceptions to the rule." Ician warned. "Why was she not punished?"

"Now whoever said she wasn't being punished?"

"But you just said-"

"I said that I wasn't punishing her." The Administrator reminded him.

"Then who is?"

"Herself."

"... What?"

"Look, I'll explain from the beginning."

"You said that just now." Ician growled.

"This is a different beginning."

"And which story's beginning are we looking at now, might I ask?"

"I'm about to tell you now." The Administrator smirked. "Get comfortable with that cup of hot chocolate, because this is going to be a long story."






One month ago


Equestria's western desert was not a very hospitable place. About ninety-five percent of all there was was sand, and the remainder was mostly made out of cacti and other desert-dwelling organisms. The only artificial constructs in the area were the railway tracks, the trains that occasionally whizzed through and ultimately out of the desert, and the small town of Appaloosa, parts of which constituted the arena known as Dustbowl.

It was in this arena that BLU and RED were currently engaged in a life-and-death struggle over the ownership of the  apple orchards just outside the borders of said town.

Rainbow squinted as the splatter of blood from the BLU Soldier's chest hit her right in the face. She paused for a moment, wiping the blood off her eyes, the proceeded to kick the limp body of her victim to ensure that he was dead. Receiving no response, she shrugged and dashed off to take out another-

"Oomph!" A brief but powerful burst of air blew her off course and into the wall of a nearby building, her Scattergun clattering to the floor beside her. "Ouch..."

"Gotcha!" Out of the shadows of the cliff stepped a masked earth pony, forehooves clutching a Backburner. "You're mine now!"

"Aw, c'mon Pinkie!" Rainbow huffed in mock disappointment, slowly reaching for the pistol in her belt. I hope she doesn't notice... "I'm on a killing spree! Don't spoil it for me!"

"Sorry Dashie," she said cheerfully, "but I'm on a killing spree too! And I'm not about to let a perfectly good kill get away!"

"What about a kill that ain't perfectly good?" With a grin of triumph she whipped out the pistol and let loose a series of shots. Pinkie charged forward, not once flinching as she raised her flamethrower horizontally and caught most of the shots on the sturdy metal.

"What the..." Quick as a flash, Rainbow rolled out of the way, grabbing her Scattergun in the process, as the Pyro barreled straight into where she was just a moment ago, flames scorching everything in front of her.

Pinkie didn't miss a single heartbeat. In one smooth motion, she pushed herself off the wall with her hind hooves and angled for Rainbow.

"Oh shi-" The pegasus squeezed off a few pistol shots in panic before resorting to her Scattergun.

bang

Pinkie's confident grin morphed into a grimace of pain. A few bloody wounds on her chest indicated the spots where bullets had penetrated - and there were a lot of them - but she continued unhesitatingly, blazing fire searing the fur right off Rainbow's right forehoof. 

Rainbow yelped out in pain. The smile reasserted its dominance on Pinkie's face, 

With astonishing speed, the bat flew out and collided with the Backburner. It slid out of Pinkie's hooves easily, but Rainbow was smarter than to feel proud of herself. She knew Pinkie too well to think that she had disarmed her out of skill.

A second later, the Axtinguisher nearly took off her head, a last-second twitch of her bat-bearing hoof having only just saved her in time. She flinched backwards, twirling her bat to block the next two blows from the axe. Pinkie stepped back and delivered an even more powerful hit to the struggling pegasus' weapon.

Rainbow grunted. The bat removed itself from her grip and struck the ground with a metallic clang.

Pinkie leveled the axe at her throat. "Ah well. At least you tried, Dashie." A mischievous glint appeared in her eyes. "And failed again."

"Not next time I won't." Rainbow retorted. "Just you wait. I'm going to beat you if it's the last thing I do!"

"Don't be sad." Pinkie chuckled. "At least you can outrun me, right?"

"Well yeah, I am the fastest pony in all Equestria."

"Oh yeah?" A cocky smirk stretched across Pinkie's face. "Even faster than, say, my team's Scout?"

"You're on!" Rainbow grinned. "She and I have a few things to settle now."

"But first..." Pinkie pressed the axe ever-so-lightly into the skin of Rainbow's throat. "We still have a few things to settle."

"Ugh, fine." Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Let's just get this over with, shall we?"

Pinkie leaned closer. "Tell you what. I'll make this less painful just for you, Dashie."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Right..."

The sound of a throat being cleared echoed through the battlefield.





"So, it took me all of two seconds," the Administrator explained, "to deduce that those two were friends. Close friends, in fact."

"Two close friends who were trying to kill each other." Ician pointed out.

"Only because they were abiding by the rules of the contract, which is, mind you, the same contract that ensures that they get a steady paycheck every month."

"Still, would friends kill each other for money?"

"Maybe not - unless no matter how many times either 'died', they would still come back to life."

"Fair enough."

"They were treating it like a game. A friendly game between two friendly... friends." The Administrator's eyes flashed with condescension. "This, I cannot allow."

"In that case, what did you do?"

"I decided to lie a little bit. Just a little. I merely had to gauge the extent of their friendship. It went somewhat like this..."





"Attention RED team." The voice blared through Dustbowl's many Administrator-controlled speakers. "It appears that there is a slight technical problem with your Scout's respawn point. Should she die before it can be repaired, she will not respawn." A pause. "BLU team, carry on with your work as usual. That is all."

Rainbow felt Pinkie's gaze on her. Suddenly, the sharp edge of the Axtinguisher at her throat became that much more threatening.

Pinkie frowned. "Well, looks like we'll have to continue our fight another time." She withdrew the axe and extended her hoof. "We'd better get you someplace safer till things are back to normal."

"Hey, thanks Pinkie." When she accepted the proffered appendage and allowed herself to be pulled to her hooves, she realized that she was shaking.

Evidently Pinkie noticed it, too. "What's wrong, Dashie?"

Rainbow laughed nervously. "Even I don't know. It just felt... like... I can't really describe it."

"Fear?" Pinkie offered.

"... Yeah, I guess." She laughed again, once more tainted with the uneasiness of before. "But I don't know why. I mean, it was you. You'd never hurt me, right?"

"Of course not!" Pinkie grinned. "Unless you'd come back for more hurting."

Rainbow punched her friend playfully. "You're the worst, Pinkie."

"I am." She laughed. "Now c'mon, let's go."

"Alright, I'm co-" Rainbow took a step forward and cringed. "Ah... I think I've got a nasty bruise on my leg."

"Really?" Pinkie asked. "That's all you got?"

"But you-" She took a good look at Pinkie's chest and stopped. "Never mind."

"It's alright, Dashie." Pinkie gave a cheerful grin. "I hardly feel it."

"Are... are you bleeding out?"

"Not anytime soon." She spared a glance at Rainbow's injured leg. "Lean on me. I'll bring you back to your base."

"Aren't you afraid my team's gonna shoot you?"

"With me supporting you? I don't think so." Pinkie looked at one of the cliff-mounted speakers. "At least I'll respawn if anything goes wrong."

"Thanks, Pinkie." Rainbow lifted her injured leg off the ground, letting her body rest heavily against Pinkie's. "You're the best."





"Of course, the respawn point wasn't ever disabled." Ician said.

"Never." The Administrator confirmed. "It was only a test. And Pinkie failed."

"Which brings us to my earlier question." Ician put a hoof to his chin. The vulture, still perched on his shoulder, gave its master a brief look of contemplation. "What did you do?"

"Nothing. Not that day, at least."

"Then when?"

"The next day. It was a battle at Gorge. She refused to fight."

"Let me guess." Ician closed his eyes thoughtfully. "She was afraid that something like this might happen again, and this time she might be too late to hold her weapon back."

"Exactly."

"I assume the action you took was drastic."

"Very much so." He agreed. "I cast a little spell on her."

"And by little," Ician guessed, "you mean incredibly powerful."

"That's about right. It was a personality shifting spell."

"Personality-" He stopped, sitting back in his chair. "How does it work?"

"I... didn't want to lose the old Pinkie." The Administrator admitted. "I grew fond of her. I simply made it such that she wouldn't be capable of refusing to fight again."

"And you achieved this how?"

"Her new personality becomes... how should I say it... active, when emotions such as anger and fear consume her."

"Which are both emotions often felt in the heat of battle." Ician nodded in comprehension. "I see."

"Her normal self," The Administrator continued, "becomes active when she's extremely happy or excited, with the exception of when she's excited or happy about killing or death in her new self."

Ician frowned. "In that case, how does she transition from her new self to her old?"

"Ah, yes. That's what I need to explain to you."

"Evidently so."

"That's with the aid of..." The Administrator paused, plausibly for dramatic effect. "... Her final personality."





"So she walked me all the way to RED base." Rainbow gestured to Applejack, who tipped her hat in acknowledgement. "AJ's sentry here nearly shot her to death."

"Ah guess mah skills with th' Wrangler are just too good." She chuckled, twirling the said weapon around her hoof.

"You don't know how good a friend you had, Rainbow." Twilight said quietly. This is the first time she's spoken since she started staring at me like that...

"Why?" Diana asked.

"Surely you can see it." She sighed. "But then again you weren't there."

"See... it?"

"You're familiar with the Administrator. You should know how he works." Twilight waved her hooves around in a vague manner. "It was the way he said what he did that day."

"How did he say it?"

"He said, 'BLU team, carry on with your work as usual.' That was not a suggestion. It was an order."

"An order?"

"Yes. An order to continue killing regardless of the situation." Twilight shot a deliberate look at Diana. "By refusing to cooperate, the BLU Pyro defied the direct command of the Administrator..."

"... And she did it for you, Rainbow." Diana finished for her.

Rainbow glanced at Twilight, her mind working on overdrive to process what she had just been told, and then back at Diana. "What...?"

"I have first-hoof knowledge of the Administrator and how he does things, and so does Pinkie." Diana said. "She should know that such overt disobedience warrants punishment of the highest order."

"... What would that be?" Rainbow asked.

"Anything from extreme physical torture to death. The permanent kind." Diana quickly added. "No respawn points involved."

Slowly, Rainbow sank to the ground, eyes on her hooves. "She did that... just for me?"

"Probably." Twilight cast another glance at Diana, who this time reciprocated it. Why does she keep looking at me...

"Oh my gosh... I had no idea..." Rainbow looked up at Twilight, teary-eyed. "Is that why she changed?"

"Changed?" Diana leaned forward interestedly. "What do you mean?"

"You don't know?" Twilight asked, eyeing her with suspicion and curiosity.

"No." She said. "Why?"

"It happened not too long ago." Rainbow said, keeping her eyes on the ground. "After that day, I didn't see her again until next month, where she-"

"Killed me." Applejack said curtly, settling back into place a moment later.

"... Yeah." Rainbow paused, taking a second to collect her thoughts before continuing hesitantly. "I mean, it's supposed to be her job, sure, but I'd never seen her like that."

"I was there when it happened." Twilight cut in. "She used to kill in as painless a way as she could, but after that she seemed to relish in the pain and misery she caused. It was as if she... changed somehow.."

"Changed..." Diana mused. "I see."

"There's been speculation," Twilight said, "but none of us here can really explain it. There are rumours, of course - evil clones from the Mirror Pool, dangerous forbidden spells, those kinds of things. The main thing we all agree on, though, is that the Administrator's behind it."

"It does seem like a sensible conclusion." Diana conceded. "Still, what do you think he did?"

"I don't know." Twilight shook her head. "But what I do know is that he has command of the most powerful of magic anypony has ever gotten their hooves on."

Rainbow's face contorted into what might have been the beginnings of anger. "So it was him?"

"It's something we cannot confirm."

"Look." Diana stepped in, ending their exchange. "Perhaps we should change the topic. I do not want to be obliged to tell the Administrator something you would not want exposed."

"... You're right." Twilight said. "We'll continue this conversation some other time, Rainbow."

Rainbow stared at Twilight, fixing her with a gaze of impatience. Twilight gave a firm shake of her head. Rainbow looked away with an unreadable expression on her face. "Alright."

"Rainbow, listen." Diana said. "There are some things we cannot change in life." Unless you're the Administrator. "So we need to look past what's happened and move on. I don't think Pinkie would want you to start and inevitably perpetuate a hateful cycle of revenge." She paused. "Providing that the Administrator won't take you out first."

"Take me out first?"

"If he really is responsible for Pinkie's change, it's highly probable he might do the same for you - or worse."

Rainbow fell silent.

"As much as I hate to admit it, darling, she's right." Rarity stepped forward, embracing Rainbow in a gentle hug. "It's good to confront the bad times in life, but only so you can accept them and let your life continue as per normal. If it's going to drive you to insanity I advise that you don't think about it."

"Let's talk about something else." Diana suggested. "How and when did you and Pinkie become friends in the first place?"

"Hm..." Rainbow considered the question. Rarity took advantage of her momentary distraction to release the pegasus from her forelegs and return to her original spot. "We go back a long way... I think at least a year or so."

"A year?" Diana asked, surprised. "That long?"

"She is one of my best friends."

"Good point."

"I first met her when she pranked me."

"Pranked you?"

"Yeah. With a water balloon trap."

"... I'm not even going to question how that trap is supposed to work."

"I don't think I ever got it either." Rainbow shrugged. "But I got my revenge the next day."

"How?"

"Poison Joke."

"Oh."

"Nasty stuff, I know." Rainbow grinned. "But she deserved it."

"How exactly did this lead to the two of you becoming friends?"

"We both liked pranking, and think of all the possibilities if we worked together! Nopony would be safe!" She cackled evilly.

"So... you did."

"Yep. We got to know each other better too. Do you know Pinkie's really sick-minded?"

Twilight cringed. "Not something we needed to know, Rainbow."

"Okay, not that sick-minded. She just tells a lot of dirty jokes." Rainbow cracked a devious smile. "Do you know what the word 'memory' means?"

"Rainbow, shut up." Twilight snapped.

"Aw, come on! It's funny!"

"Not to everyone."

"Fine..."

Diana cleared her throat. "So, other than her immature use of... mature jokes, was there anything else about her that made her unique?"

"Hmm..." Rainbow scratched her head. "There's her randomness, I guess."

"Randomness?"

"Yeah. A lot of the time she'd just say things that make no sense."

"Like what?"

"Well, there's her 'fourth wall comments'."

Diana frowned. "What's that?"

"I don't know either."

"Actually," Twilight said, "the term 'breaking the fourth wall' is defined as the interaction of a character in a book, play or movie with the audience, which shouldn't strictly be possible as they are, by default, separated by an invisible 'fourth wall' between realities. Hence, the name."

"But wait. If Pinkie makes these comments, it would mean that-"

"- we would have to assume we exist within the boundaries of a preset storyline." Twilight finished.

"So... we're in a story?" Diana asked.

"Don't let Pinkie get to you." Rainbow waved her hoof dismissively. "That's just her being random."

Or insightful. Diana thought.

"Besides," she continued, "how the heck would Pinkie even know if we're in a story?"

"She does have the innate ability to defy logic and physics." Diana pointed out.

"But that doesn't mean she can break the fourth wall!" Rainbow paused. "If there is one."

"She may be creative, but some are just really out of left field." A brief glint shone in Diana's eyes. "She once told me about this story called 'Meet the Team: Pony Fortress 2'. She told me about how it was about a 'bunch of interviews of nine different mercenaries'."

"Wait." Twilight lifted her hoof to her chin. "Isn't that what you're doing?"

"Exactly. And then she said that she looked at the comments -"

"Comments?" Twilight asked.

"They're basically reader reviews of stories that are posted in a virtual world that can be accessed by anypony from around the world." She stopped. "That's Pinkie's definition, at any rate."

"I... see..." Twilight hesitated. "... No, I don't really see."

"It's... It's not like I understand it very much either." Diana replied. "But anyway, she said that she read the comments and was 'amazed at how close some guesses like Lium's, Crimson Dawn's and LakieLegion's came to the truth from as far back as Meet the Medic'."

Fluttershy looked up. "Meet the... Medic?"

"What is that supposed to mean?" Twilight shook her head vigorously, trying to make sense of the whole affair.

"I have no idea."

"Hey w-wait!" Rainbow stared at Diana. "She told you? In person?"

"Well... yes." Diana admitted. "She was... in the Administrator's headquarters a lot. Yes. I ran into her on several occasions."

"Did she say anything about me?"

"Uh... not really. We never chat with each other for long."

"Oh." Rainbow's hopeful look dissolved into a downcast one.

"It's probably not that she didn't want to, but rather that we never really had time to talk." Diana explained hurriedly. "I'm sure if I hadn't always been scrambling off to my next interview she would have talked about her good friend. One year of friendship isn't something somepony can forget so easily."

Rainbow let a faint smile show on her face. "I guess."

"Besides, what I do know is," Diana turned towards Twilight, "the real Pinkie would sooner kill herself than you, Rainbow."

Twilight silently gazed at Diana. Her eyes hardened almost imperceptibly.





"Her third personality." Ician deadpanned. "Of course there would be something else you forgot to mention earlier."

The Administrator ignored him. "This final personality is brought about during the times when calm and peace reign. It's characterized by a straight mane and tail flowing directly downwards, while the other two personalities retain their poofy manes. When this happens, Pinkie adopts a cool, analytical frame of mind, assessing things logically." He coughed purposefully. "For once."

"So first, after she regains her calm in the post-battle period, she will revert to this personality, allowing her to consider the circumstances before taking further action." Ician nodded. "I see."

"And in this mood, it's an acceptably easy task to bring her back into her original personality." The Administrator said. "In fact, her interview today is meant to achieve a double purpose, one of which is related to my earlier topic of conversation."

"What are your aims?"

"Firstly, it will tell me what the others think of Pinkie." He steepled his fingers. "Secondly, it allows me an opportunity to test the limits of her new powers. The loss of her inhibitions towards killing - painfully, if necessary - will make her a potent force on the battlefield."

"The interview is today, right?"

"It's happening right now." The Administrator snapped his claws, and three computer screens materialized above the table and came crashing down.

Ician edged around the table to get a clear view. Amazingly, they weren't yet broken.

"Watch." The Administrator pointed at the first screen, which displayed a static image of Diana and her masked, flamethrower-bearing assailant locked in combat. 

A frown instantly etched deep lines into Ician's face. The vulture glanced at him, mirroring his expression.

"I'll unpause it." The Administrator tapped the screen once, and the video began to play. Time unfrozen, the two ponies resumed their struggle to survive and kill, respectively.

"This was from earlier today." He jabbed a finger at the flamethrower that had just been knocked aside, and then at its original wielder. "The Pyro allowed herself to be disarmed here. It was a test for-"

"That's not the Pyro." Ician interrupted. His bird stared at the Administrator with a rasp of distrust.

The draconequus smiled widely. "Now, whatever do you mean?"

"You know what I mean. That's not the Pyro and you know why."

"Impressive." The Administrator spread his arms in a gesture of sincerity. "My apologies. I wished only to measure your intelligence."

Ician sat back silently.

"That was, in fact, my assistant Screwball." He snapped his fingers again, and the image of the battle faded away. It was soon replaced by the darkened interior of his office. The lights had been switched off, leaving the eternally active computer screens as the last line of defense against the all-consuming darkness. A lone beanie-wearing earth pony stared contemplatively at the computer screens through swirling irises.

"Screwball." The Administrator called. The earth pony turned towards the camera, her poofy mane bobbing up and down. "It's the Administrator. How are things going over there?"

"Fine! Everything's prepared here!"

"The buttons?"

"Ready for action."

"The recording?"

"I've already plugged it into the observatory speakers."

"The cameras?"

"Diana's set them all up for me, as per your orders." She gestured at the myriad of computer screens. "I'm looking at Canterlot from fifteen different angles right now."

"Excellent." The Administrator considered Ician. "You see, I had her dress up in the Pyro's flame-retardant suit and go to Canterlot herself, but only briefly. It was meant to be a test for Pinkie."

Ician just stared forward, undoubtedly piecing the puzzle together in his head. "Did she manage to get that test done in the end?"

"Yes, in Canterlot itself." The Administrator touched the second computer screen lightly, and scene of a fiery maelstrom engulfed the display. At the centre of it all, a spectre of death, replete with emotionless mask and full-body suit, laughed maniacally. "This... is the result of that test."

"Innocent lives were lost." Ician stated.

"Nothing essential."

The vulture shot him a glance of disgust. Ician, for his part, remained unreadable.

"Don't look at me like that. They'll all be replaced in a few generations' time."

"Ignore her." Ician patted the vulture, and mouthed a few words to it. It nodded. "She doesn't behave as well as I'd like sometimes."

"Nothing I can fault you for." The Administrator said.

"Now, before I forget, how did Screwball manage to infiltrate Canterlot?"

"She could have entered under my authority, but I deemed it unnecessary to arouse Celestia's suspicion by doing it so publicly. She used her chaos magic to bend the laws of physics and get in."

"I've never seen her use those powers before."

"She usually uses it to float around with her propeller beanie. Besides, did you expect any close assistant to chaos itself to go without such magic?"

"Right..."

"So that's the first half of Pinkie's test."

"The first half?" Ician questioned.

"The second half... is going on right now." This time, he didn't even bother touching the last screen; simply flicking his fingers at it was enough to bring it to life.

Ician squinted. "Is that... the inside of Canterlot Castle's observatory?"

"The one and only." In the room, six ponies were gathered in a rough approximation of an oval.

"Twilight Sparkle, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, and Diana." Ician rattled off the list.

"Correct. And if you look closely, you'll see the BLU Pyro." He laughed. "Who am I kidding? You'll never see her."

"I cannot see her, but I know where she is." Ician turned to the Administrator. "How did you set up such a clever disguise?"

"It was another little test of mine. I had an illusion spell that worked not by bending light to change the image but rather by influencing the onlooker's perception of the pony under its effects. Theoretically, this means that everypony who looks at her would see something different, but I had to test it out to make sure."

"Does it work?"

"It does." The Administrator regarded the scene on the screen. "Even now, none of them know that the Pyro is in the room with them. Save one."

"Diana." Ician said. "She's been in league with you from the very beginning. She set up this trap for them."

"Absolutely accurate, my friend."

"Administrator, with all due respect..." Ician stood up suddenly. "This is madness!"

"Really, now?" Even the vulture was staring at him with eyes of fury. "How so?"

"You cannot condemn the five of them to death! Equestria needs them! The infestation is too powerful to be defeated with only the remaining four mercenaries!"

"Now, what makes you so sure that Pinkie is going to win?"

"If you weren't sure, you wouldn't have sent her there!" Ician turned to the screen. "Order the BLU Pyro to stand down!"

"I'm afraid it's a bit too late for that." The Administrator snapped his claws. "I've already dropped the illusion."

Ician snarled. "You..."

"Just sit back and enjoy the show." The Administrator smiled. "Consider yourself privileged that you can witness, firsthand..."

"... the end of Harmony."





Time's up. We need to act now.

Maybe we don't have to? I mean, it seems pretty senseless when you think about-

Not one more word from you. You know what the Administrator said.

What if we don't listen to him?

Oh no, not you again. Listen, you don't have a say in any of this.

Why not?

Because we're not happy or excited right now, are we? You have no power.

...

You know what you have to do. Let the anger flow through you.

We still have some time to think about this. The interview's not over yet.

You're wrong. Dead wrong. It's already over.

What do you mean?

The disguise.

I don't see-

It's fading.

...

Don't tell me you can't feel it.

... I can.

Then you know what you must do.

Unfortunately, yes.

Then go. Do the Administrator proud.





Diana stared Twilight right in the face. The unicorn flinched backwards; it was as if a reservoir of fury and rage had emptied themselves in her eyes.

"Rest assured, the real Pinkie values you more than she does herself." The edges of Diana lips drew back in a malicious grin. "However, you will find no such Pinkie with you today."

"Diana, darling, whatever is going on?" Rarity asked, confused.

"The due course of things, my friend." She spat out the last word with disgust.

"Stop right now!" Twilight shouted, raising her Huntsman and training the arrow on Diana.

"No." A shadowy cloud of smoke erupted from her saddlebags, obscuring her devilish smirk from sight.

Twilight released the arrow, hoping, with no great confidence, that it would hit its target. With a sudden blast of air, however, it immediately reversed direction, forcing her to the ground to avoid it.

The smoke cleared; out from behind the veil stepped a changed pony. In her pink hooves rested the Backburner, and both the Axtinguisher and the stock fire axe jutted out from within her saddlebags. Her mouth was twisted in a manic smile. Her cold, ice-blue eyes shone with heartlessness and bitterness. Her mane and tail, both straightened, violently sprung up into poofiness.

Four of them stepped away from the monster fearfully. Twilight, however, stood her ground, Jarate and Bushwacka in her telekinetic grip.

"It seems," Twilight growled at the pony before her, "that the killer has been unmasked."

"Yes." She cackled in reply. Her head turned to Rainbow. "Oh, my dear Dashie, I need your help."

Rainbow gulped. "With what?"

A spark ignited in Pinkamena's gleeful eyes. "Making cupcakes!"





To be continued in Meet the Pyro (Part III)