Chapter Seven
Daring Do’s head was spinning faster than the business end of a lathe. It was a feeling that she was all too familiar with, especially after a long night of drinking. It had the same pounding headache, the same empty void in her memory where the past several hours should’ve been, and a lingering taste on her tongue that reminded her of the time a dung beetle crawled into her mouth. The whole situation felt oddly familiar to the pony, but for the life of her, she couldn’t figure out why. It didn’t help that her brains felt like scrambled eggs at the moment, making any attempt to dredge up memories a fruitless endeavour.
Normally when Daring awoke with these feelings, she would grab her bedsheets, roll over, and try to get some more sleep. However, there were no sheets to grab, and the pegasus soon realized that she was laying on a hard dirt floor rather than the comfort of her own abode with a broken flask laying next to her.
“I have got to drink more responsibly,” Daring groaned before letting out a few muffled coughs. She was a professor of archaeology for Celestia’s sake, she needed to start acting in a manner more befitting of her station. Getting blackout drunk was what ponies like that insufferable Blondie did, not respectable mares with tenured positions.
Eventually, the sunlight pouring into the room was too much for Daring Do to ignore. Despite making her headache worse, her eyes creaked open like a rusty gate. Standing over her was a strange-looking zebra, adorned with bone piercings and gold rings, who gave the semi-conscious pegasus a curious gaze.
“Je, wewe ni sawa?” the zebra spoke as she nudged at Daring with her hof. “Unaweza kuniambia jina lako na wakati wa siku?”
Daring Do just blinked in a brief lapse of confusion as her mind processed what was happening. She didn’t recognize the zebra, which was odd because Daring considered herself to be adept at telling zebras apart.
“I’m sorry, I don’t understand what you’re saying,” Daring said in a weakened voice.
Taking another look-over over the zebra, Daring figured that she was staring at some kind of medicine mare from the Buckswana regions. It might explain why she felt like the bad end of a night-long bender: strange medicines weren’t the only things those zebras were good at brewing.
“Mimi naogopa kwamba kitu amekwenda vibaya,” the strange medicine mare continued. “Akili yake bado inaendelea ambapo siyo ya.”
Daring wasn’t sure why she bothered listening to the zebra; it wasn’t as though the words were going to suddenly make sense to her. However, a quick glance at the zebra when she spoke revealed that she was not speaking at Daring Do, but rather somebody at the other side of the room. She followed the gaze to its target: two ponies sitting casually at the sidelines as if awaiting Daring’s revival. Unlike the zebra, who had elicited nothing but confusion and curiosity upon first sight, seeing the two ponies prompted a surge of adrenaline to spur Daring back to her hooves.
“Blondie!” she exclaimed. The sense of shock was clearly not mutual, as the nameless gunslinger pony regarded Daring Do with a detached, almost contemptible, stare. It was the kind of penetrating glare that made the pegasus wonder if she was about to be standing on the wrong end of a gun barrel. She couldn’t understand why her former colleague held no joy in seeing Daring, but it likely had something to do with the pony standing next to the gunslinger.
Shock turned to anger when Daring’s eyes fixated at the blue-maned unicorn who stood alongside Blondie. Adorned in glittering jewelry, there was no mistaking who this figure was.
“Rise and shine, Daring Do,” the unicorn taunted with a sinister smirk. “Have a nice sleep?”
“Azura! I should’ve known you’d be behind this,” Daring snapped back. It was more bravado than actual fact, as Daring’s memory felt as full of holes as a colander. Nonetheless, her instincts told her that any situation involving that evil enchantress was bad news for her. It wasn’t even very good bravado as it was clear that the three-on-one odds put Daring in a corner. “Whatever you’re planning, you won’t get away with it.”
“Poor, foolish Daring, you never did know when to give up,” Blondie said as she took a menacing step forward.
“Blondie, whatever crazy thing Azura has offered you, I guarantee you that it isn’t worth it.” It was a long shot, but Daring was willing to bet that it would have taken a lot more than just money to convince her former lover to turn against her. But the nameless gunslinger just kept advancing, seemingly indifferent to Daring’s pleas. “Come on, Blondie, you don’t want to do this!”
“There’s no use, Daring,” the enchantress continued to taunt. She laughed a most vile and bone-chilling shrill. It may have been unsettling, but it was also telling: it meant that the arrogant unicorn had some kind of ace-in-the-hole.
There was only one kind of ace that would make an enchantress like Azura so cocksure, and it made things even more discouraging for Daring. “Snap out of it, Blondie! Azura has you under some kind of mind control spell or something.” Unfortunately, impassioned pleas were a far cry from the kind of power that was usually needed to break a mind control spell, of which there were dozens of different forms and each with their own peculiarities.
Blondie continued forward undaunted, the malicious intents visible in her eyes. “You will tell us where the book is,” the gunslinger warned. “Where is it ?”
“The...book?” It took Daring’s mind a few seconds to piece the clues together and remember about the lost tome of Star Swirl the Bearded. As much as Daring would have enjoyed pointing out that whatever she had just drank made it impossible what she had for breakfast, let alone where Star Swirl’s book was, the hungover archaeologist suspected that such an admission would not help her situation. At best, it would give Daring a small sense of satisfaction before Blondie attempted a blunt-force style of mnemonics.
The mentioning of the book did jog some of Daring’s memories. She remembered a castle, and deadly traps. There was also somebody else in the castle; a purple pony or something. Were it not for the blonde-maned pony ready to beat answers out of Daring, she would have had the time to focus on putting a name to the face that was lingering just out of her mind’s reach.
“Listen Daring, we can do this the easy way...or the fun way,” Blondie warned one last time while she flexed her hooves in anticipation. “Please say the fun way.”
Since surrender was not a part of Daring’s vocabulary, she merely smirked and replied, “You think a beating will make me tell you where Star Swirl’s book is? Ha! Bring it on!”
As the saying went, ‘a general goes to war with the army they have’, and the only army that Daring had at her disposal was her hat. It wouldn’t be the first time that Daring has had to rely on her trusty pith to get out of trouble. After casually removing her helmet as though in preparation for a fight, she sent the headgear hurtling towards Blondie with a quick flick of her hoof. The attack caught Blondie by surprise with the helmet smacking her in the face, throwing the gunslinger off-balance long enough for Daring Do to crash-tackle the earth pony to the floor.
That still left Azura and the zebra to contend with. While Daring did not know what allegiances the zebra held, she decided not to take any chances. She rushed the zebra, who seemed to have been taken completely by surprise by the sudden violence, and proceeded to throw her into the oncoming Azura, knocking both of them into a nearby table..
With a surprisingly easy victory secured, Daring grabbed her hat and made for the exit. If Azura was still on her tail about the book, then Daring Do had to make sure that she got to it first.
“What just happened?” Twilight groaned as the weight of Zecora atop of her robbed the librarian of what strength remained.
“Before or after Rainbow Dash wigged out?” Applejack quipped in response, still rubbing the sore spot on her face.
The interior of Zecora’s hut had been thrown into disarray thanks to Rainbow Dash’s sudden burst of violence. The table that Twilight and Zecora had crashed into had thrown its entire contents across the floor, which included a large number of vials and flasks, ground up herbal ingredients, and Applejack’s half-eaten breakfast. There were few things as depressing as a ruined breakfast.
“I don’t understand,” Twilight said whilst helping Zecora back to her hooves, “you said that potion was supposed to help put Rainbow in a trance.”
Thankfully, aside from being a bit dazed, Zecora did not appear to be injured in any way. Nonetheless, she looked to be as confused to the outcome as the others. “Indeed, a trance was the effect of the potion drank. I cannot say why it made her turn and kick our flank.”
“Well whatever the reason, Rainbow Dash is acting crazier than that time Big Mac ate those bad mushrooms,” Applejack said before grabbing her fallen hat. “She was calling you Azura and saying stuff about Star Swirl’s book. She must be hallucinating or something.” It was bad enough that Rainbow Dash thought she was Daring Do, but now it seemed that she thought everything around her was pulled from Daring Do’s world as well. Once again, they were forced to track down the wayward pegasus before the situation got worse. If Rainbow Dash thought that Twilight was an evil sorceress, there was no telling who she might mistaken others for.
Twilight nodded in agreement. “I’ll fly ahead and see if I can catch up to her.” Unfortunately, while her spirit was willing, the body was less so. When Twilight tried to unfurl her wings, one immediately snapped inwards and sent a shock of pain up her body in an act of protest. “Ow! I think I twisted my wing when I hit the table.”
“Maybe you ought to stay behind, sugarcube,” Applejack suggested. “I’d hate to see you get hurt more.”
“It’s just a wing, I’ll be fine,” Twilight insisted. As time was not on their side, the farmer pony decided not to argue any further with her friend.
Before they left, Twilight turned to their friend, Zecora, who already had set to work trying to reorganize her wrecked hut. She wondered what it was about Rainbow Dash that always led her to wreck whatever room the pegasus happened to be in.
“Zecora,” Twilight began, lending some assistance in arranging the furniture with her magic, “do you think you might be able to find out what went wrong, and maybe some way to fix it?”
“To fail in such a manner is no error that I would make,” Zecora replied in defense of her pride as an herbalist. “For my friends and my pride, this task I shall not forsake.”
Daring Do could not believe what she saw as she wandered into the nearby town. Though things had changed, including considerable economic growth, the archaeologist recognized the once quaint little town of Dusty Trails. It was the same fledgling town that she had wound up in with Blondie back during her pursuit of the Amulet of the Equilla. She had to admit that it was impressive to see how much the town had changed in the five years since Daring had lasted visited. One would have been hard-pressed to tell that a gunfight involving Daring Do and Blondie resulted in the collapse of a water and blowing up a two-story saloon.
Those were the good days.
Now it was Daring who found herself on the wrong of Blondie’s pursuit, and she knew from experience how the nameless gunslinger operated. Running was out of the question; unless Daring was prepared to live the rest of her life on the run, Blondie would never stop in her pursuit. On top of that, Daring had to find a way to beat Azura to the book, and she couldn’t do that if she was constantly looking over her shoulder. That left Daring Do with only one option, and that was to stand her ground against her pursuers.
That was going to be a more difficult prospect than she could even imagine. Blondie was a hero to the Dusty Trails, which meant that she couldn’t and wouldn’t expect their help in confront the gunslinger. And speaking of gunslinging, Daring was unarmed, while Blondie would no doubt be bringing some kind of firepower to this fight. The archaeologist didn’t even have a knife to bring to this potential gunfight, nor any bits to her name in order to acquire one. And as much as Daring didn’t want to admit it, she was hesitant to use such force against Blondie. Adversaries or not, she still cared about that hot-tempered wanderer, and preferred to find a way to avoid a direct fight with her.
Undeterred, Daring headed into town in search of a means to her end. The weather was surprisingly mild for a desert town, but she had more important things to worry about than unseasonable weather. She began slowly wandering through the town, up and down the dusty streets, in hopes of finding inspiration. So much had changed that she began to think that she would be better off seeking help from the townsfolk. With any luck, some would remember the name Daring Do and wouldn’t ask too many questions about the kind of assistance she needed. If they found out she was working against Blondie, they may become hesitant to help.
For a brief moment, Daring Do thought about tracking down her old friend, Doc Tenderhoof, and perhaps enlisting some aid from him. However, the same problem arose as Tenderhoof owed more to Blondie than he did to the archaeologist. She ultimately decided it was best to leave the doctor uninvolved with this situation.
“Oh my gosh, it’s Daring Do!”
The sudden yelp of childlike wonder and awe caught the pegasus by surprise. Though her globetrotting escapades had brought a level of fame and prestige to her name, Daring was not accustomed to the starstruck adoration of little fillies. Most youth who uttered her name did so in a frustrated groan after she announced a surprise exam, or handed out the course syllabus.
“Oh, um...hello there,” Daring Do replied to the three little fillies that now stood before her. There was a pegasus, a unicorn, and an earth pony, but she didn’t recognize any of their faces. However, given that it had been almost five years since her adventure in Dusty Trails, these ponies would have been barely out of their diapers had they been in town back then.
“What’cha doing Daring Do? Out for more adventures?” the pegasus filly asked with an enthusiasm that was not matched by either of her cohorts.
“Something like that.” Once again, Daring did not to let any of the townsfolk know ahead of time that she had fellow Dusty Trails heroine, Blondie, out for her blood. Thankfully, the fillies seemed far less concerned about the specifics, and more about the idea of an adventure as a whole. “I can’t tell you much about it, though - it’s very hush-hush.”
“Cool! Anything we can do to help?” This time, all three fillies appeared equally interested in the prospect.
“Good idea! Maybe we can get some cutie marks in adventuring,” chimed in the young earth pony before she turned to Daring. “Can we help, please?”
At first, Daring was hesitant to get the fillies involved, but a good adventurer made use of what tools were available, even in imperfect situations. She realized that she could make use of their offer without having to put them in harm’s way. Plus, it was extremely difficult to ignore their pleading stares.
“Okay, but you can’t tell anypony that I sent you,” Daring answered.
All three fillies immediately cheered in unison, “We promise!”
“I need you get me some things from the general store,” Daring explained as she gestured for the three fillies to gather in close. “I’m going to need at least two bags of flour, a bag of cornstarch, a bottle of corn syrup, a large pot to mix it all in, and access to a stove.”
“What do you need all that for?” the filly unicorn inquired.
“It’s a secret. Just trust me on this,” Daring reassured them with a wink. “Also, do any of you know where I can get some rope and access to someplace secluded?”
“That’s easy,” the young earth pony answered. “You can use the barn out by my family’s farm.”
“Good, let’s get to work! I’ll meet you all by the water tower in an hour.” As she watched the three fillies race off, giggling to themselves in their childish glee, Daring couldn’t help but feel a bit more optimistic about her chances now. She may not be able to match Blondie for raw strength, but she had her superior wits, and that would make all the difference today. It was time for the hunted to become the hunter.
“Something ain’t right,” Applejack concluded as she and Twilight came to a halt in the center of town. “Rainbow Dash could gone from here to the other side of Equestria in all the time we’ve been searching, but everypony I’ve asked have kept telling that they saw her wandering around town ‘a few minutes ago.’” Given that they last saw Rainbow Dash fleeing into town like a Daring Do with a stolen idol, it made no sense to either of them that the pegasus would suddenly stop and loiter in town so openly.
“Remember, Rainbow Dash doesn’t just think she’s Daring Do, she believes she’s reliving one of her adventures,” Twilight reminded her friend. “She mentioned something about Star Swirl’s book, so that would make this somewhere in the earlier chapters of ‘Daring Do and the Temple of the Alicorns’. She might be thinking that Ponyville is Dusty Trails.”
“But Blondie wasn’t in that part of the story, and she reacted to you as if you were evil, but Azura didn’t betray Daring until much later.” Applejack knew only bits and pieces of the latest Daring Do story, but she did recall those particular details, as Rainbow Dash talked about them constantly for days after reading those parts of the novel.
Twilight paused briefly to contemplate what her friend said. She stroked her chin in pensive thought until she was able to deduce an explanation. “Her memories must still be fragmented,” she concluded, “so her mind is trying to piece together a reality based on what memories are present, including Rainbow’s knowledge of the later chapters.”
While Applejack was appreciative of her friend’s deductive reasoning behind this phenomenon, it all academic with no practicality behind it. “That’s all well and good, but does that get us any closer to finding her?”
Once again, Twilight fell into a pause of pensive pondering. “Well, when Daring Do was in Dusty Trails, she was searching for clues about Blondie’s whereabouts.”
“Except Rainbow thinks that’s me,” Applejack pointed out, “and you saw how she reacted to that. She thinks I’m working for you—er, I mean Azura.”
“Daring is still in love with Blondie, she’d never give up on her.”
“So you think she’ll come for me again?”
“It’s the only reason that Daring would keep in town, otherwise she’d be trying to beat me to the Star Swirl’s book,” Twilight was about to suggest a plan to Applejack when they both noticed that the once sunny afternoon became markedly darker. Neither pony recalled any forecasts for bad weather in the coming days, prompting both to follow their curiosity upwards to the single cloud hovering over them. At first they both thought it was just a rogue raincloud that got loose from the weather team, but then they noticed it was a bizarre cream-like colour and was bulging in its saturation.
“What in Equestria is up with that cloud?” remarked an utterly baffled Applejack.
The same question ran through Twilight’s mind with the exception it reached a conclusion much sooner than her friend. The only words that Twilight managed to utter before the cloud was dropped from the sky were a meek, “Oh no.”
Neither pony had time to react as the strange-looking cloud landed atop of Twilight Sparkle, exploding like a water balloon and covering the pony princess in a thick, yellowish goo.
“Twilight, are you okay?”
“I think I’m okay,” the saturated alicorn answered. However, when she tried to move, she discovered that her new viscous coating was holding her in place. “I...I’m stuck!” Twilight tried lifting a hoof off the ground, only to have the goo pull it back to its spot on the ground like a rubber band. “It’s some kind of glue.”
“Here, lemme help ya out.” Applejack was about to grab hold of her friend’s hoof when a cry of ‘wait’ halted the farmer’s actions.
“Don’t touch me! You might get stuck as well,” Twilight warned. It couldn’t have been a coincidence that a glue-infused cloud had landed on the alicorn’s head. This mess had Daring Do written all over it.
“Are you able to...you know, magic your way out of that mess?”
“I might.” Unfortunately, the librarian’s uncertain tone betrayed what she really thought. “But if I try to separate myself from the glue, I might accidentally separate myself from all of my fur.”
There was an unpleasant thought to behold. “You best stay put then, sugarcube,” Applejack insisted. As much as she would have liked to have Twilight’s help in chasing down Rainbow Dash, she was not going to jeopardize her friend’s fur and dignity in order to accomplish that.
Given that clouds didn’t just fall onto ponies at random, save for that one time that Derpy had been left in charge to supervise cloud positioning, Applejack began scanning the cloudline and the crowds for any sign of a multi-coloured pegasus. By sheer luck, she spotted a flicker of a rainbow-coloured tail disappear down a nearby street.
“Wait here,” Applejack reassured her bogged-down friend. She hated the idea of having to abandon her friend in such a predicament, but she could not let Rainbow Dash slip away again.
The gathering crowds of ponies parted way as the farmer galloped after the fleeing pegasus. She was getting sick and tired of always having to chase down Rainbow Dash whenever something went wrong. It was so typical of that fool-hearted pegasus, even when she was delirious. Rainbow Dash was always the first to charge headlong at a problem, but whenever the problem was the pegasus herself, all of a sudden she was nowhere to be found. Some days it felt like her life and their relationship would go a lot smoother if Applejack had some wings of her own. Applejack swore if she caught up to Rainbow Dash, she was going to strap down her wings in iron chains until this whole sordid affair was settled.
Perhaps if Applejack were not so preoccupied by her own frustrations, she might have spent a moment wondering how in the world she was managing to keep up with Rainbow Dash. Despite the fleeing pegasus’ attempts to lose the farmer by weaving through a crowded marketplace, it should have been obvious that Rainbow Dash was not trying her best to lose her pursuer. It wasn’t until Applejack had been led out of town, towards Sweet Apple Acres, that she finally clued into the fact that something was amiss.
“What in tarnation,” she murmured under her breath, slowing her pace as Rainbow Dash surge ahead. Why was Rainbow Dash leading her back to the farm? It was a perplexing puzzle. Normally, Dash would have retreated to the clouds, where Applejack would be unable to reach, or perhaps into the orchard where the thick foliage would have kept the farmer guessing for ages. However, she soon realized that she was going about the issue the wrong way. She shouldn’t have been asking herself what Rainbow Dash was thinking, but rather consider what kind of plan Daring Do would have in store. Why would Daring Do lead her back to Sweet Apple Acres?
When Applejack saw her quarry fly into the Apple family’s barn, it became clear to the farmer that Rainbow Dash was plotting an ambush. Little did the delusional pegasus realize that Applejack had the advantage of being on home ground. Rather than chasing the pegasus blindly through the barn’s main doors, Applejack looped around to the side of the barn. After creeping up to a nearby window, she carefully peered inside the barn. The interior was just as she had last left it: bales of hay, barrels, and empty pens. At first, there appeared to be no sign of the pegasus. The possibility of Rainbow having used the barn to simply block the line of sight before taking to the sky had crossed the farmer’s mind, but it seemed like as unnecessary as taking cover from a blind pony. However, after careful scrutinization, Applejack caught a glimpse of the pegasus’ trusty pith helmet, taking cover behind some stacks of hay.
“We’ll see who gets the drop on who,” Applejack mentally snickered to herself. Knowing the layout of the barn like the back of her hoof, the farmer ventured around to the back of the barn. Using her earth pony fortitude and her lassoing skills, Applejack used her rope to climb up the side of the barn and enter into the hayloft from an upstairs window. Like a cat stalking its prey, Applejack crept across the crossbeams until she was right above where she needed to be. “Ah’ve got you now.”
As tempting as it was, she refrained from any victorious battlecry as she leapt from the rafters, descending upon the unsuspecting pony with a thunderous crash that kicked up a cloud of dust and loose hay. In a flurry of speed, precision, and frantic hooves, Applejack put all her roping skills to the test as she hog-tied her quarry with blinding speed. So blinding, in fact, that she didn’t even realize that she had just tied up a mannequin that had been fitted with Rainbow’s hat and a wig made out of hay.
“What in the—HAY!” Applejack’s confusion was abruptly interrupted when a rope-trap snared around her hind legs, snapping shut and hoisting the farmer in the air. It took her brain a few seconds to orientate itself from its inverted position and realize that she had just been duped. She may as well have just put a bow on her head and tied her own hooves for all the good her sneaking around did.
“Hello there Blondie,” Rainbow Dash spoke up, her voice echoing from a far corner of the barn where she had been hiding all along. “Nice to see you...dropping in.”
“Very funny,” Applejack deadpanned. “Now let me down, this instant. Yer acting crazy, Rainbow. Well, crazier than usual, that is.”
“You know I can’t do that Blondie,” Rainbow said with a noted sadness lacing her voice. “I don’t know what Azura has done to you, or told you, or promised you to make you work for her, but I can’t let her use you like this.”
For a brief instant, Applejack was worried about what Rainbow had in mind. She knew that the adventurer, Daring Do, would stop at absolutely nothing to claim her prize, but what would that mean for one tied-up pony? Applejack could see the conflict raging inside the pegasus’ eyes - the look of a pony who was clearly torn between two extremes of their conscience.
Despite having her fore hooves free and fully capable of trying to knock some sense into the pegasus, Applejack remarked motionless as Rainbow stepped closer and gently stroked her cheek. “I won’t lie to you, Blondie...I’ve missed you, missed us, but this needs to be done,” the pegasus whispered. Rainbow’s voice carried the same kind of regretful morose that reminded Applejack of the time that she had to explain to Winona why she was putting her on a diet. Each passing second made the farmer more anxious as to what was about to happen.
“Come on, Rainbow, snap out of it,” Applejack pleaded, bordering on the mental state of panic. “Don’t you recognize me? It’s me, Applejack! We love each other. We don’t tie each other up in the barn...well, most of the time we don’t.”
Applejack tried to plead her case further, but in an unexpected move, Rainbow leaned in and embraced the other mare in a tender kiss. The earth pony ceased her struggles as her anxieties began to melt away under the warmth of their passion. Even if she didn’t have Rainbow Dash’s memories, the pegasus knew how to kiss like her. It may have not held the same level of emotion and love as her Rainbow, but for a pony whose hearted long for relief as much as Applejack, even a sip of water was better than the continued thirst.
Their embrace came to an abrupt halt when the barn door suddenly swung open to reveal a trio of little fillies. “Hey Rainbow Dash, we just—” Apple Bloom’s words were cut short as the three fillies stared slack-jawed at the two adults.
With the exception of Rainbow Dash, every pony’s face went through a cycle of a half-dozen shades of red before all three Cutie Mark Crusaders bolted out the door without another word.
“Apple Bloom, wait! It ain’t what it looks like!” Despite Applejack’s protests, the trio of fillies were long gone in a matter of seconds. Of all the days for Apple Bloom to actually heed her older sister’s insistence on privacy.
“Probably for the best,” Rainbow Dash murmured to herself as she stepped away from the still-hanging pony. "It's best if they don't see this."
Applejack’s worries intensified as the pegasus meandered over to a nearby chest, wherein the Apple family stored some of their tools, and began rummaging through its contents. There were a lot of tools in there that could some real harm to a pony when used with malice: hammers, shears, pliers, hacksaws, and even a crowbar if her memory served her correctly.
“Y-you don’t have to do this, Rainbow,” she pleaded with an overwhelming surge of anxiety. “You have to remember who you are! And...and that Ah love you!”
For reasons unknown to Applejack, her words appeared to have gotten through as the pegasus abruptly ceased what she was doing and looked to the suspended mare with a disheartened expression.
Rainbow Dash let a quiet sigh before averting her gaze to a nearby window. “I want to believe that,” she answered back, “I really do. You have no idea how many years I spent trying to find you. I knew you were alive, but eventually I had to accept the truth: if you had wanted to be found, you would have let me.” Rainbow turned back to the tool chest and began searching through it again. “I’m sorry, Blondie, but I’ve moved on.”
That was not the heartfelt revelation that Applejack had been hoping for. Perhaps if she were the real Blondie, she’d have a better idea of what to say, but as it stood, everything she said was filtered through the pegasus’ addled mind into something different. As Rainbow turned to face the helpless mare, Applejack braced herself for whatever fate had in store for her.
“A ball?” Applejack was a bit surprised to see the pegasus returning with a rag and a small rubber ball. “So that’s where Winona lost that thing.”
Concerned turned to confusion as to the purpose of Rainbow’s scheming, but any questions were short-lived as the pegasus set to work. She set the rubber ball in the center of the rag, and then wrapped the cloth around it like a burrito. By the time Applejack realized that the other pony was simply making an impromptu ball gag, it had already been shoved into her mouth and secured around her head. The earth pony made a few fleeting attempts to voice her protest, but her muffled indignation did little to sway Rainbow Dash. Her captor finished securing her by binding her remaining hooves with another length of rope secured to the overhanging crossbeam.
“Well this is undignified,” Applejack lamented in silence, now hanging like a piñata.
“Once I’ve secured the book, I’ll send somebody to get you,” Rainbow Dash explained before she headed for the exit. “And for what its worth, it’s good seeing you again.”
The parting words provided little comfort for Applejack, who could respond with a disheartened and muffled sigh of resignation. How did this all get so out of control? This kind of madness was supposed to happen to other pony’s relationships, not hers. It was only a few days ago that she and Rainbow Dash were riding the emotional highs of their love. Everything was perfect and care-free with the rare exception of a girlfriend who occasionally forgot important dates. It was enough to make her want to buck a tree over. Now here she was, tied up and alone, wondering if she’d ever get the love of her life back. She was even willing to give up on the whole kids thing if it meant getting Rainbow back to normal.
For a brief moment, Applejack wanted to just break down and cry. Everything was going wrong, and it was all because she had to go and lose her temper at Rainbow Dash. She had become so worked up over the future that she had neglected what was right in front of her in the present. Whether it was the quiet solitude or the excessive amounts of blood rushing to her head, but hanging upside-down afforded her a great deal of insight.
It was hard for Applejack to keep track of time, but she wagered about a half-hour passed before she finally resigned herself to her dangling fate. Eventually somepony would wander into the barn, either Apple Bloom or Big Mac, and they’d get her down, perhaps after a few awkward stares and intrusive questions. She just hoped that Big Mac didn’t decided to pull extra hours in the orchard to make up for her unexplained absence.
Just then, however, she heard some scuffling at the barn door. It was an unfamiliar sound, not anything a pony would normally make, but the source soon revealed itself as the barn door was pushed open and in walked Winona. It may have not been Big Mac or anypony else, but Applejack was nonetheless relieved to see someone. The dangling mare began squirming and making muffled grunts to get Winona’s attention. The faithful dog let out a few happy barks before scampering over to see what was happening.
“Errmmph mmpphh merf!”
Sadly, Applejack’s attempt to convey her sense of urgency was lost somewhere in the translation. Winona merely stared with a half-tilted, quizzical look as the pony dangled overhead. She then noticed something peculiar in the pony’s mouth - something round. Drawn in by curiosity, her eyes fixated at the mystery object. The canine knew not what it was, only that she wanted it. With a short hop, Winona grabbed hold of the rag with her teeth, and began a tug-of-war with Applejack. The farmer pony pulled with all her might, lifting Winona off the ground for a brief moment before the dog’s weight tore the rag open.
With joyful cheers and barks, the rubber ball fell to the ground, bringing Applejack one step closer to freedom. “Good girl, Winona!” Applejack exclaimed. “Someone’s getting an extra treat for dessert this evening.” Now Applejack just had to figure out how to use Winona to free herself from the ropes.
Winona, however, had other ideas in mind. She grabbed the rubber ball with her mouth and looked up to Applejack with expectant eyes and a wagging tail.
“Now ain’t the time for playing fetch, Winona.”
Despite the insistence otherwise, the canine maintained her eager gaze.
“No, Winona. Put the ball down,” Applejack said with a more firm tone. This time, the words got through. Despite a whine of protest, Winona let the ball go. “Good girl. Now Ah need you to listen very closely,” the pinata pony continued, “Ah need you to go out and bring back help. You understand me? You gotta find help.”
After barking back what Applejack could only assume to be an acknowledgement, Winona bolted out the barn door. Now all the farmer pony could do was hang around and hope that help came back soon. She had no idea when or if Winona would return, and the thought of screaming for help did cross her mind. However, by her mental clock, Big Mac would be somewhere out in the southern orchard at that particular time of the day, and Apple Bloom had run off with her friends to Celestia knows where. The only pony who might be in earshot was Granny Smith, and she could sleep through a gale force hurricane without issue. In the end, Applejack decided to spare herself the strain and indignation of screaming for help until her voice went dry.
Once again, Applejack had to guess how much time had passed before she finally heard the sound of approaching footsteps. They were too light to be a pony, which meant that it seemed Winona had returned without a pony in tow. The loyal canine companion barged into the barn, carrying something in her mouth. It looked like some kind of green cloth, which only served to confuse her further until Winona set it down beneath her.
“Winona, I said to get help - help,” Applejack said with a disappointed sigh. “What am I supposed to do with a piece of seaweed anyways?”
She was about to dismiss Winona’s curious brand of help when the sound of approaching hoofsteps drew her attention back to the door.
“Winona, come back here with that!” Rarity shouted as she raced in. “I need that for my spa—” Both the unicorn’s words and pace came to a screeching halt as she saw her friend suspended from the ceiling. Confusion was the foremost expression upon Rarity’s face as she took in the scene of a rope-bound farmer and her dog. “Applejack, what in Equestria is going on?”
Rarity would not have been Applejack’s first choice for a rescuer, but she recognized that she was hardly in a position to be picky over such details. “It’s kind of a long story. Well, actually it’s kinda short, but that ain’t important right now. Have you seen Rainbow Dash?”
“Rainbow Dash? Why?” Rarity asked before giving a playful smirk. “Should I go find her and send her this way?”
“What? N-no! It ain’t like that,” Applejack stammered in response. “This is serious: Rainbow Dash is in trouble! Now are you gonna keep gawking or are you gonna help me down?”