There was nothing quite like captaining ones own dirigible. Akin to standing on the top of the world, little could match the sense of power and majesty of it. Indeed, the only thing missing was somepony to share it with.
Fancypants refused to lament his current lack for companionship. It had been a choice after all. There were more than a few ponies who would have been overjoyed to join him, even a number who could have helped tend the craft. The one he'd wished to have along, however, had other engagements.
Putting the wind to his back and locking the wheel, he moved from the helm to relax on the main deck. It was a beautiful day and he was not going to see it wasted.
He'd just gotten comfortable on his lawn chair when a violent explosion sounded off the port side. With a less than dignified shout, Fancypants fell out of the chair and rolled across the wooden deck. Sputtering in confusion, he did not believe his eyes. A veritable blizzard of brightly colored streamers and confetti coated himself and the entire port side of the ship. The sight that followed did little to improve his compression.
Off to port the most absurd craft he'd ever seen waffled from side-to-side. Little more than a frame of blue bars, the craft could best be described as rickety. A single large propeller whacked noisily through the air, powered only by the furious peddling of its two occupants. Most distressing was the oversized blue cannon mounted on its side.
His monocle dropped as he recognized the ponies in question. The first was a pony he knew only in passing. Pink from head to hoof, she wore an eye patch with a stripped vest under a black jacket and a gold trimmed tri-fold hat. The second, and far more familiar, was a mare his own age wearing a similar get up only without the hat and a hook gripped in her hoof instead of the eye patch.
Before he could venture a statement, the first mare spoke up in an obviously over done voice. "Arg, yeah scurvy dog. I be ca'pin Pink Beard and this be The Dread Pirate Lilies. We be commandeering this here schooner."
Fancypants' couldn't but admire the second mare, barely registering the words being spoken. Once his turn to talk came, however, he smiled. "Not the dreaded Pink Beard? Scourge of the high winds? I must say, I always imagined you'd be slightly more pronounced in the beard department."
"Oh shoot! I knew I forgot something!" Pinkie said, completely dropping character.
Smiling devilishly, Fancypants continued, "I doubt that two lone mares will be able to part me from my ship, no matter how lovely they may be."
The Dread Pirate Lilies made a graceful leap from the flying contraption to land barely a length from the stallion. A raw intensity burned behind her half lidded eyes as she stalked closer. "No? Your confidence shall be your undoing, for I know your greatest weakness." Her last word saw her but a breath away. "Surrender now, for I shall not hesitate to use it."
"Do your wor--"
His words were cut off as a pair of lips latched desperately onto his. Before he knew it he was being pushed back toward the cabin, Fleur not letting up for a second.
Pinkie giggled when the door slammed shut behind them. One Hearts and Hooves couple down, how many more to go? Her legs pumped furiously as she veered off toward Ponyville, hoping the next few wouldn’t need so much peddling.