*FFFFFFFFFFFRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPTPTTTTPTPTPPTPPTTTTBPBPBPTBTTTTT*
Time froze.
Nopony dared move, blink or even breathe.
For a brief moment the room resembled a still painting, even Celestia’s ever flowing mane seemed to have stopped its movements for the moment.
Then Princess Celestia made one mistake. She carefully shifted her weight.
*PPPPPFFFFFWWWWHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEHHHprrtblblbl*
The whine caused by the last of the air escaping from the whoopee cushion echoed around the silent room.
Ponies began to glance around nervously, but avoided looking at their ruler. This kind of social embarrassment would have been met with harsh criticisms and an exclusion from any future events for a long time. Seeing as it had been the ruler of Equestria whom had befallen a most unfortunate accident, the noble ponies were unsure how to react.
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Twilight Sparkle sat wide-eyed amongst her friends, her mind not willing to process what just had happened. An intake of breath next to her alarmed her that she had to do something. With amazing speed her left hoof shot to the side and clamped Spike’s mouth shut before he had the chance to say something or worse to start laughing.
She let her eyes dart across the ponies in her vicinity. Next to her Shining Armor sat, beside him his wife Princess Cadence. Opposite them were their parents who seemingly still were frozen in shock.
Opposite Twilight Pinkie sat and seemed thoughtful, an odd moment for the pink party pony. Next to her was Applejack’s place. Twilight noticed that she had pulled her trademark hat down a bit and she was holding one hoof to her mouth. Very briefly Applejack locked eyes with Twilight, the unicorn noticing the amusement glinting in the farmpony’s eyes.
Did she think this was funny?
Two places were currently unoccupied to Applejack’s right. There were reserved for Applebloom and Sweetie Belle respectively once they arrived. Opposite the fillies and to Twilight’s left was Spike’s place and next to him the currently vacant seat for Scootaloo.
Next to Scootaloo’s seat another pegasus sat. Twilight shot Rainbow Dash an angry glare, as she heard a suppressed snicker try to escape her lips. Rainbow Dash didn’t notice the look as she had her eyes closed and was fighting off an attack of the giggles by covering her mouth with a hoof.
Opposite Rainbow Dash was Fluttershy’s seat, the timid Pegasus had her head bent down and covered up her face with her pink mane.
She seems to be….is she smiling?
Indeed a small smile had formed on the pale yellow mare’s lips. Twilight’s eye twitched in response.
Rarity sat to Fluttershy’s right and stared blankly at the napkin on her table. An action that was copied by the two ponies opposite her, Fancy Pants and Fleur de Lis.
Twilight carefully risked a look at her mentor and ruler of Equestria. The Princess also just stared into nothingness and didn’t move an inch.
What’s should I do?
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Twilight's last thought was shared by almost everypony in attendance, even the guards dotted around the room were seemingly unsure how to react. One pony in particular felt the need to act.
Prince Blueblood was desperately thinking of the proper way on how to react to this monumental social faux pas. Had it been any other pony he would have sneered at them and motioned to have the offender removed from the room, preferably dragged from it by the guards. Seeing as this was the Princess that particular method of handling things would not work.
That left only one other course of action in his mind at least. He began concentrating hard.
“Hnnnnnnnngngngnggg.”
The Prince’s efforts were clearly heard amongst the attendees who were still too stunned to make a sound. Their eyes slowly moved over to the Prince at the end of the table. His face was scrunched up in effort.
*Ppppprrrrtt!*
Prince Blueblood smiled smugly at the ponies around him. His reasoning was to side with Celestia in her social misstep and thus possibly gain favor with her. Slowly the same thought made its way into the heads of other nobles. The sound of ponies concentrating hard on their bodily functions rose like a swarm of particularly angry bees.
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Twilight didn’t know what to do let alone think. She felt Spike struggling on her hoof trying to possibly laugh. That would not happen if she could help it. Her eyes darted over her friends and family around her.
Her parents sat motionless with lips pressed tightly shut. Shining Armor had fallen back on years of training and service in the royal guard and blankly stared straight ahead at nothing. It wasn’t easy for him to keep his reserve thanks to Princess Cadence who had her head pressed against his side, obscuring her face from Twilight’s look.
Applejack was now biting down on the brim of her hat, Twilight felt anger well up inside her.
How dare she be amused by this!
A grunt to her left made her whip her head around to find the offending pony. Rainbow Dash had both of her hooves now pressed against her mouth and her eyes closed with a tear slowly trickling down from the corner of her right eye. Her face was also beginning to turn purple in the effort of not laughing out loud.
At least Rarity had the decency to have fainted melodramatically and was now leaning against Fluttershy. The pegasus fanned her friend with a hoof, but was still smiling that small smile. Twilight’s ears folded back at the sight.
Fancy Pants had resorted to clean his monocle with a piece of cloth and tried to block out what was happening all around him. Like Shining Armor Fleur had training to fall back on to keep her expression as neutral as possible. Being Equestria’s premier model meant she would have to express emotions or hide them regardless of the circumstances during her numerous photo shootings.
A grunt from her left caused Twilight’s head to spin around, she was determined to not let this entire thing become even more of a fiasco than it already was. To her surprise it had not been Pinkie Pie who had grunted, but it had come from Princess Cadence. She was pressing her face into her husband’s side to suppress any sounds made, but her shuddering shoulders told Twilight exactly what was going on.
The pony she was worried about the most sat strangely quiet in her seat. Twilight had thought that Pinkie Pie would have brought the entire thing to new levels by laughing or even worse joining in. Yet the pink earth pony merely looked confused at the events around her.
“Boy, I hope one of these ponies won’t be a literal party poo…”
Pinkie’s quietly outspoken thoughts on the matter were abruptly cut off by Twilight by shoving a napkin into the pink pony’s mouth with her magic. Twilight glanced over to Celestia hoping she hadn’t heard what had been said.
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Princess Celestia was still motionless in her seat. She was having a flashback.
A few hundred years ago there had been a miscommunication between the pegasi and earthponies. It had led to a draught in parts of the country, which in turn had damaged the crops. For an entire winter all the ponies in Canterlot had left to eat were beans.
It had been during that time that open flames had been outlawed in enclosed spaces after a series of unfortunate events. It had also been the time that Canterlot had been called the Windy City, something that Celestia had not found too amusing. She had painstakingly and carefully removed any mention of that name in the history books.
She mentally shrugged away the memories and turned her attention back to the present. Now well aware of what was going on she was thankful that the lighting in the room was supplied by magically charged crystals hanging high above them and not by candles.
Using her magic she reached under her golden cushion and removed the device that had brought on those old memories. She held the whoopee cushion in front of her in a soft magical glow. Patiently she waited as the impromptu unorthodox concert died down. Once she was sure the ponies in attendance had seen what had caused the stir she cast another spell. With a poof of magical energies the cushion vanished. A second surge of magic casually opened a few windows.
“Shall we begin with our main course for tonight?” she calmly asked.
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In the hallway beyond the dining room a sight could be seen that was most surprising.
Princess Luna was sprawled out on her back clutching her belly with her front hooves. Her wings were spread across the floor to her sides. Her howling laughter had died down somewhat, but a few tears still leaked from her eyes. The soundproofing spell had done its job well and nopony had heard her mirth.
Three fillies had not shared her enjoyment. They had watched the events unfold with horror. Scootaloo had chuckled a bit, but it had been more of a panicked reaction. Applebloom had just watched in silence as Twilight’s head whipped around and was seemingly becoming more agitated. Even now her ears were twitching sporadically.
Worse off was Sweetie Belle. The little unicorn was on the verge of tears herself, but rather ones of fright than joy. She nudged the Princess of the Night with her forelegs.
“Please! You have to do something!” she pleaded with the Princess who was still recovering from her laughter. “I don’t want to be banished to the Everfree Forest!”
Princess Luna slowly regained her awareness of her surroundings. Two small hooves continuously poking at her sides helped somewhat. She lifted herself up from the floor and wiped away some of the tears on her face. Well aware now of the little white unicorns pleading she smiled at the fillies.
“Calm down, little one. You have nothing to fear, nopony knows who put that device under Celestia’s cushion.” Luna grinned and chuckled once more at the memory. Sweetie Belle wasn’t convinced and still seemed to be on the verge of tears. “Breathe deeply and relax.”
Sweetie Belle did as she was instructed and very slowly began to calm down.
“Now then, shall we join my sister and your friends for dinner?”
Sweetie Belle feverishly shook her head. “We can’t go in there! They will find out!”
“They will not. Do not fret young ones, if they should find out I shall be there beside you.” The knowledge that at least one of the Princesses would be one their side calmed them down some more.
Luna waited until they were ready to go inside. Once they nodded to signal that they were ready to go inside, Luna cancelled her soundproofing spell and opened the doors wide.
“Greetings esteemed guests. I trust your evening has been one worth remembering?” Luna said loudly to draw everyponies attention to her as she walked through the open doors.
“Princess Luna, how nice of you to join us.” Princess Celestia greeted her younger sister as she came closer. The guests bowed respectfully in their seats as Luna carefully took her seat opposite her older sister.
The crusaders had entered just after the Princess and had used her loud entrance to quickly sneak to the empty chairs reserved for them. They sat down without saying much and tried to pretend that they knew nothing of what had just happened.
Waiters soon appeared from the other doors and took the orders of the guests. It did not take long for the food to arrive, no more thoughts were spared as to what had happened before. Ponies began quietly talking about politics, food, weather and other typical topics that were reserved for these events.
All had seemingly forgotten save for three fillies and a purple unicorn.
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Twilight’s thoughts were consumed with why somepony would have pranked Celestia and especially who would have done it. Her initial first thought had been Discord, but she remembered that Celestia had said she would know if he had been here.
Her other two suspects were currently occupied with their meals. Pinkie Pie was talking to Twilight’s parents while happily munching on her salad. Rainbow Dash was talking to Scootaloo about the Wonderbolts once again. Both of them were notorious pranksters in Ponyville, but Twilight knew that even they had their limits. Celestia was most certainly one of those limits.
Perhaps it had been some kind of strange attempt at political assassination?
Twilight dismissed the thought as farfetched. Inwardly she was fuming that somepony had the audacity to do something like that to her beloved mentor. She would investigate more once dinner was over, it was too bad that Celestia had destroyed the cushion, perhaps she could have found some clue as to who had been the culprit.
Twilight took a bite from her eggplant casserole and watched her friends. Then she noticed something strange. The absence of three voices she normally would always hear laughing during parties where they were invited to.
She looked over to the crusaders who were strangely quiet.
Scootaloo was chomping away at her meal with typical pegasus fueled hunger and listening to Rainbow Dash’s explanation of a triple looping corkscrew dive. Applebloom was eating her meal more slowly and watched Spike explain the finer nuances of Donut Joe’s donuts.
Then Twilight looked over to Sweetie Belle who had left her meal largely untouched. Very briefly their eyes met. Quickly the little unicorn looked away nervously, even ducking slightly away. Twilight’s eyes narrowed as she stared at the filly. Her eye twitched as she watched as bead of sweat make its way down from Sweetie Belle’s forehead.
She knows something!
Twilight was speechless for the moment. She began grinding her teeth at the implications that Sweetie Belle’s reaction told her. A slight tap of a hoof on her shoulder interrupted her trail of thought. She snapped her head around in surprise and saw that Cadence was looking at her from behind Shining Armor’s back.
“Twilight? Are you ok?” she asked with concern.
“Yes, fine. Just peachy!” Twilight said unconvincingly.
“You seem a little stressed out. Don’t forget the breathing exercises I thought you.” Cadence watched as Twilight began to do said exercises almost immediately. She was indeed feeling a little stressed at the moment. Deeply breathing in through her nose she raised a foreleg to her chest. While breathing back out through her mouth she stretched the foreleg out in front of her. She repeated the exercise four more times before she was calmer than before.
She would have to have a serious talk with those three fillies. For their sake she would wait for it after dinner.
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Twilight wasn’t the only one thinking about who had set up the prank. While Princess Luna gave a brief report over the uneventful activities on Equestria’s borders, Princess Celestia watched her guests carefully.
Much to Luna’s worry her sister kept looking back to the crusaders, with maybe a bit too much interest. Luna decided to intervene and take away Celestia’s interest in the fillies. She gave her report on the weather.
“There have been minor weather patterns that may cause some problems in the future.” Luna reported as took a sip of her drink. Celestia focused her attention back to her younger sister. Problems were something that needed to be addressed before any personal affairs.
“What kind of problems?” she asked.
“Flat turbulence.” Luna carefully watched Celestia’s face.
“Flat turbulence….”
“At least I believe that is the correct term. I may be mistaken however.” Luna took a bite from her salad while Celestia simply stared at her.
“And what is that supposed to be?” she asked carefully.
“Oh you know. Wind rushing through the lower area causing quite a stir in the process.” Luna waited for any kind of reaction, but her sister kept a straight face. “Sometimes they create these miniature tornados.”
“Dust devils.” Celestia added dryly without blinking.
“Yes, indeed. Sometimes they can wander into crops and destroy them in the process. To my knowledge they have been coming dangerously close to destroying crops of beans, cabbages and onions and such. I know how much you love them. Would be a shame if something were to happen to them.”
Celestia carefully levitated a glass to her lips and took a long sip of the drink inside.
“Yes it would. Do you have any thoughts on how to deal with the problem?”
“I believe you are familiar with the concept of breaking wind.” Luna asked innocently while a pony within earshot suddenly began choking on his meal. “You build up obstacles along…”
“Yes, I am aware of how wind breakers work. You should bring up your concerns with the weather factory in Cloudsdale.” Celestia put her glass back down. A lesser aware pony would have never seen how her eyes narrowed by a fraction of a hair. Luna nodded in agreement, well aware that she was approaching thin ice.
“Tell me Luna, how was your evening up there on the observation tower? Not upset that you wouldn’t attend the festivities in the garden I hope?” Celestia put on a sorrowful expression, one that didn’t fool Luna one bit.
“Oh no. I had time to contemplate things from the past.” Luna replied and smiled.
“From the past you say? Anything in particular?”
“Just remembering the times in our old castle deep within the Everfree. Do you remember that we sometimes used to play music in the afternoons?”
Celestia’s smiled a genuine smile this time. She did indeed remember those times. Sadly she had given up playing music after she had been forced to banish her sister.
“Do you plan on playing your harp once more?” Celestia asked and nibbled on a leaf of lettuce.
“I was actually thinking of maybe taking up a different instrument this time. Maybe a wind instrument.” Luna mused and saw Celestia’s eyes narrow a tiny bit more. “I know you have some experience with those.”
“I used to play the flute.” Celestia finally replied after a few seconds of silence. “One of my favorite pieces was written specifically for that instrument.”
“Oh? Pray tell which one was it?” Luna asked with a smile.
“Journey to the Moon I believe it was called. I haven’t heard that in quite a long time come to think of it.”
“Mmh, I do think I know that song.” Luna replied. Her smile didn’t falter, but she was well aware that the ice she was standing on had become very very thin. She decided to not provoke her sister any further. Her goal of diverting her attention away from the fillies had worked and she concentrated on finishing her meal.
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A while later dinner was over. The guests flocked back into the garden for some light desserts and more mingling. Luna had retreated back up to her post on Canterlot’s tower after saying goodbye to the invited guests.
Twilight had missed her chance at cornering the crusaders. Once Luna had left, they told their sister that they were getting tired and had excused themselves. The lavender unicorn would have to confront them in their room, which was good as it kept any unwanted attention away. Now all she had to do was round up their guardians and tell them about her suspicions.
She found Applejack and Rainbow Dash near a buffet table serving ice cream. Applejack was moaning about the applesauce on her vanilla ice cream would have been better had they been apples from Sweet Apple Acres. Rainbow Dash didn’t really care too much about that and had just finished off her second banana split.
“Girls, I need to talk to you!” Twilight said as she stood beside them.
“Uhh, are ya ok sugarcube?” Applejack asked with concern. It was apparent that Twilight was not having the best of times. Her mane was slightly in disarray and her nervous flicking of the ears didn’t help much to assuage her friends concern.
“It’s urgent!” Twilight stated with a hiss, causing the other two mares to flinch back a bit. “Meet me in my room. I have to find Rarity.”
They watched her walk away further into the garden. Applejack and Rainbow Dash exchanged a glance and merely shrugged. Whatever was on Twilight’s mind they would find out in her room, so they made their way there.
A few minutes later Twilight arrived with Rarity in tow at her room. Applejack and Rainbow Dash had been patiently waiting in front of her door. Twilight quickly ushered them inside and closed the door after they were all inside.
“What is this about Twilight? You didn’t say anything to me when you dragged me away from my chat with Fleur.” Rarity moaned and faced the other unicorn. Twilight took a deep breath before answering.
“I think the crusaders had something to do with the things that have happened this evening.”
The accusation surprised the friends and they exchanged nervous glances with each other.
“How’d ya get that idea?” Applejack finally asked.
“They know something! They were acting too quiet during dinner!”
“They were tired, darling. You can’t blame them for tiring themselves out and then not being fully attentive during dinner.” Rarity raised an eyebrow in concern as Twilight’s eye twitched.
“No, no. They weren’t tired, they were feeling guilty! Come to think of it, perhaps they orchestrated the entire thing!” Twilight began pacing back and forth in front of the assembled ponies.
“Wait, wait, wait.” Rainbow Dash held up a hoof to stop Twilight from saying any more wild accusations. “You are telling me that those three managed to prank an entire garden party and slip a whoopee….”
“Yes!” Twilight cut her off. “They did…..THAT as well. That’s an attack on royalty! That’s treason!”
“Oh come now. I cannot believe my dear sweet little sister would do something of that magnitude. Aren’t you maybe just looking for a convenient scapegoat?” Rarity would not leave her sister undefended, even if the accusations came from one of her best friends.
“NO! We can prove it! We go in their room right now and ask them! I know a spell that could help.” Twilight was clearly getting too involved into her idea. Applejack stepped forward to stop her from pacing about.
“Whoa there. We ain’t gonna put any spells on three fillies! Now Ah want ya to do them exercises that Cadence taught ya! We ain’t goin’ nowhere until ya have calmed down a bit.” Applejack’s tone of voice left no room for debate. Twilight gave her an angry look, but complied and began her breathing techniques.
Five minutes later she was beginning to get a cramp in her foreleg, but had somewhat calmed down.
“Ok then. Now we all go over to the fillies room an’ ask if they do know somethin’ about this mess. But ya have ta promise me, Twi, that if they did do somethin’ that we’ll handle it.” Applejack would not let Twilight handle any kind of punishing measures to the fillies. She knew that her friend could easily get carried away, especially when Princess Celestia was involved.
“Fine.” Twilight merely stated and left the room with her friends in tow.
Once they arrived at the door to the room the crusaders were staying in, she knocked three times. Without waiting for an answer she went inside.