Living The Dream

by Kickass222urmom

Hospital: Part 2

God! I'm so bored!

Twilight came by this morning, but she couldn't stay long. She had to run a few errands with Spike. I wonder where that little guy has been, I mean, last time I saw him was at the train station after we got back from the Ski Resort.

That was four hours ago, and I've been laying here ever since, just looking at the wall on the opposite side of the room.

[Please Lance, do something fun! I can't take this anymore!]
{If I could get out of bed, I would!}

*Beep beep beep*

I looked over at the most annoying machine ever built and glared, "I will kill you."

*Beep beep beep*

I growled, "I'm serious! I will kill you!"

*Beep beep beep*

I leaned towards it and yelled, "I will end you!"

<Whoa, calm down Lance.>
[Dude, we're so bored, we're yelling at a machine...]

I laid my head back on my pillow and sighed.

So bored... So freaking bored.... I actually feel like crying!

Two minutes go by, but it felt like an entirety... I wish I could reach that book by my bed.

I looked to my left and sighed, so close, but so far away.

Wait, maybe if I slide over to the side of the bed and reached for it with my right foreleg, I may get it.

[That plan sounds legit. Do it!]
<I have a bad feeling about this...>

I take a deep breath and move to the left slightly, slowly sliding to the edge of the bed. Once there, I my body to the left slightly and began to reach for the book with my right foreleg. I could touch the book, but still couldn't grab it.

Maybe if I move a little more to the edge I could.... fall straight off and hit my chin on the desk in the process.

I fell off the bed, hit my chin on the desk, and slammed face first in the hard cold white floor.

I turned over onto my back and looked up... oh come on!

The book was tittering on the edge of the desk, about to fall off.

That's just my luck...

The book tilted forward to much and fell off the desk. It then struck my in the snout, sending a shock wave of pain through my head.

The door to the room burst open and in came the doctor, a worried look on his face, "Lance, are you okay?"

I rolled my eyes, "Oh yes, I'm fine doc. I just fell out of bed, hit my chin and face, took a book to the nose... I'm just peachy."

He sighed and used his magic to lift me back up and onto the bed, "You know, you could have asked one of the staff to give you the book."

I facehoofed, ignoring the pain in my leg, "I'm an dumbass."

The doctor chuckled and levitated the book onto my stomach, "Here, and next time, call out for help before doing something. Okay?"

I waved him off, "Sure thing doc."

The doctor smiled and left the room.

I sighed and then looked at the book. A large smile formed on my face, finally!

I picked it up in my bandaged forelegs and read the title, "'Daring Do and the Serpent Kingdom'."

<Owww, sounds interesting.>
[It says serpent... read it!]

I chuckled and opened the book and began to read it, "'Daring Do forced herself to keep up right as she walked through the hot desert sun. She so wanted to get out of this heat, but there wasn't a cloud in the sky. This was one of the many...'"

[Why does it feel like we missed some of the book?]
<I know, it was the same way in the 'Read it and Weep' episode. I don't get Equestria books.>
{Still, the books here are quiet interesting.}
[Keep reading!]

I smiled and looked along the lines, looking for my place, "'This was one of many of the challenges of the desert. Lack of water being the biggest concern.

Daring Do had already went through her five canteens of fresh water two days ago, and was already feeling the effects of dehydration. This wasn't going to stop her though, she never gave up when faced with simple challenges.

Up ahead, she saw what looked to be a pond, but she never fell for mirages. Instead of running towards it, she just kept her steady pace. Sure enough, she walked through the fake pond.

She kept going, hours passed, and still no sign of water. She saw a cactus and sighed a sigh of relief. She made her way over to it and carefully broke the top off. Inside was her prize, water.

She stuck her muzzle into it and began to slurp up the small puddle. It wasn't much, but it would suffice for now. She whipped her mouth with her right foreleg and glanced around.

"Where to now?" She questioned to the empty desert. The map said..."

The door burst open and Greg trotted in, a large smile on his face.

I let out a annoyed sigh. Now I know how Rainbow Dash felt in the show... "What do you want Greg?"

He walked over to my bed and shrugged, "Nothing, just wanting to check this place out." He turned and saw the other patient in the room.

It was a fat earth pony with bandages on his lower half. He was fast asleep.

Greg smirked, "What happened to this dude?"

I shrugged, "I don't know. I heard the doctor talking about him trying to jump or something."

Greg smiled slyly, and pulled something out of his bag. He walked over and levitated a... really? He levitated a black marker up to the stallion's face and began to draw a mustache on it, and glasses, and freckles. He then blackened a few of his teeth and wrote, Dick muncher on his forehead.

Oh Greg... I worry about you sometimes.

Greg turned back to me and chuckled, "I wish I could see his reaction when he wakes up... is that.... YES!"

He ran over to the machine next to my bed and looked it over.

Do I even want to know? "Greg, what are you doing?"

He smiled, "Getting me some morphine."

I shook my head, "No, that's my morphine. Take the fat ones."

He shook his head in return, "Nope." He then went to touch the machine.

I held up a hoof, "Come here."

He sighed and walked up closer to me, "What?"

I smiled, "Closer." My moved my right hoof down the side of the bed to grasp the small mask and turn the tank on.

He moved closer, "What do you want dude?!"

I chuckled, "Closer dude, its a secret."

He exhaled loudly and got up in my face, "Close enough?!"

I smirked, "Eeyep!"

I threw my left foreleg around his neck and held him still as I brought the mask up. I pushed it onto his muzzle and held it tight.

He began to flail around, "What the?!" Came his muffled voice.

I smiled, "What? I though you wanted some medical supplies? Well here, have some anesthesia."

His eyes widened for a few seconds, but began to slowly roll up in the back of his head.

I chuckled and sat him down.

[One down!]

I smiled and reached under my pillow and pulled out the list of names. I then marked off Greg. Now to get the rest of them.

[Man, I love payback! This will show them that we aren't going to take being the test dummy and prank target!]
<I can't wait to get out of here, then we can get all of them!>

I chuckled and put the notepad back under the pillow and yelled out, "Nurse! We got a stallion down!"

A few seconds later, the door burst open and the nurse ran in, "What happened?!"

I pointed to the mask, "He though that was oxygen and put it on his face."

She frowned and shook her head, "Oh, the poor dear." She walked over and levitated him on her back. She then left the room, leaving me there alone.

I smiled happily and opened the book, "'The map said that the....'"

A bright flash filled the room.

I slammed the book closed and yelled, "WHAT NOW!"

I looked to the end of the bed.... shit.

Annabel was standing there, a large smirk on her face, "Hiya Lance."

I smiled awkwardly and waved, "Hey Annabel... what brings you here?"

She shrugged and slithered trough the air over to the fat stallion, "Oh you know, just checking on my good friend Lance." She chuckled at the designs on his face and looked at me.

I nodded, "I see... but I know you're here for a reason. So, what is it?"

She clapped, "Very good, very good. Well, there is one thing."

I raised an eyebrow, "Oh? And what might that be?"

She smirked, "I know you're going to try and get everyone back for messing with you so much."

I cross my forelegs, ignoring the pain, "So?"

She chuckled, "Well, I'm going to give you an offer." She flew over to my bed and reached under the pillow and pulled out a piece of paper, not the list, but something I've been working on.

"What kind of offer?" I questioned.

She read over the paper, "Really? You're writing a song for Twilight?"

I sighed and took the paper from her, "Yes, now, what kind of offer?"

She clapped her hands together and somehow created a cloud. She jumped on it and laid in a dramatic way, "Well, I would like to take this little revenge thing off your hands... or hooves as the situation calls for."

I raised an eyebrow, "What do you mean?"

She rolled around and looked at me, "I want to be the one who gets them all back. I have a mega awesome prank planned out. It will be so chaotic, Discord would be proud."

I rubbed my chin, "Hmmm, I don't know. I have a lot planned out for them..."

She gave me the puppy dog eyes, "Please?"

[Why do I have a wingboner all of a sudden....]

I sighed, "Let me think about it, Kay?"

She jumped up, "YAY! I'll be back tomorrow for your answer."

She snapped her fingers and disappeared in a cloud of smoke.

What to do? I'll sleep on it.

I picked up the book and began to read from where I left off.

[I would so fuck Daring Do.] Break then began to hump the air.
<*Sigh* What am I going to do with you Break?>
[Tie me down and tell me I've been a bad boy.]
<... You're sick.>
[I know!] He then began to dance in place to imaginary music.

A small smile crept onto my face as I tried to concentrate on reading the book.