Dreams and Disasters
By Quillery

Chapter Nine

Bombshell Blonde

Dash felt warm, almost uncomfortably so. Her fur bristled and her skin prickled as a sense of dry heat washed over her. Her eyes strained open to a thin cloud of haze all around her. The presence of the steam caused her to blink rapidly, and her mind to race.

She tried to sit up, but her body did not respond. She felt her back propped against a hard surface, but the foggy environment hid it from her view. Her ears twitched at a sound, and she slowly managed to force her head to turn.

“Well if you stopped moving so much, I’d be done already,” a second voice said.

Dash peered through the misty air, and spotted the source of the voices. Twilight stood not far from her, with Vanille right next to her. Twilight’s horn was glowing brightly, as she shied away from Vanille, who was scrubbing her with a towel. Or trying to, at least, as Twilight giggled loudly and twitched while Vanille struggled to accomplish her task.

A feeling of fire assaulted Dash’s face as she watched. I must be dreaming again. This can’t be real. She swallowed loudly, trying to calm her hammering heart. I can’t move, and Twilight is bathing with Vanille in a sauna. Totally a dream. I… think I can deal with that.

Dash felt a smirk spread across her face as she stared. Vanille sighed as if she were pouting. “You are absolutely filthy, Miss Twilight. And you are not helping with all of that shrieking.”

Vanille rolled her eyes.” It is only—” Her gaze fell on Dash. “Oh, it looks like she’s awake.”

Twilight stopped giggling and glanced over to Dash. Her smile faded after a moment, and she tilted her head. “Dash? Why are you looking at us like that?”

“As far as the dreams go, this one is pretty cool. Just keep going, don’t mind me.” Dash sat back against the wall, grinning and wishing she had a bag of popcorn.

Vanille cleared her throat and returned the towel to her bags. “It seems Miss Dash has hit her head a bit harder than we thought.”

Dash blinked as her face quickly felt heated. “Uh...y-yeah! Totally hit my head… when I we… fell, and—ow!” She tried to move again, and the first thing Dash noticed was pain. Her body permeated a dull ache throughout, though that was hardly the worst part. Her head spun, and her stomach roiled as a result. She strained to open her eyes and was treated to a dimly lit blur.

Slowly, with the mist clearing, she made out where she was. She sat in a narrow tunnel, made of roughly hewn stone and mortar. It was bathed in a gentle purple glow from Twilight’s horn. Without the warming fog, the air was stale and cold, sending shivers down her skin. Her mouth tasted dry and bitter, and no amount of licking chased it away.

She tried to stand, but her legs wobbled in protest. She landed back on the ground with a grunt. As she landed, she heard approaching hoofsteps. “Oh, Dash! Are you alright?”

Dash lifted her head to see her friend standing over her, horn glowing. She let out a long breath and brushed a hoof across her forehead.

“Thank goodness you’re alright,” Twilight said. “You’ve been out a while.”

Dash rubbed her head and blinked a few times. She tried to stand again, but only managed to heave herself onto her haunches. “How long?”

Dash scratched her head. “I remember falling, and darkness. And before that… nothing.”

“She definitely hit her head,” Vanille said. “My apologies, Miss Dash, I did not compensate for navigating the tunnels with you in tow.”

Dash turned her head and saw Vanille standing behind her. Dash’s eyes widened as her memories raced back to her, starting with the ones concerning the mare in front of her.

“You!” she snarled, jerking a hoof at Vanille. “You got us into this mess, and—ow!”

Dash felt herself being jerked down. She turned back and saw that Twilight had forced her to sit, and was glaring at her.

“Dash, if it wasn’t for Vanille, we would have been ponynapped. She saved us back there, and I would expect you to be a bit more grateful to her.”

Vanille walked up and pulled something from her bags. They were small grey spheres, one of which she hurled against a wall far in the distance. It let out a quiet hiss before sending out a gout of black smoke, which just as quickly dissipated.

“A mare in Prance can never be too prepared. In the confusion, I was able to extract you both into the nearby sewer grate.”

Vanille chuckled. “They were too busy to not trip over each other to notice me seal up the grate behind me. Even if they knew where we went, they would have to tear up the street to enter where we did, and we are long gone now. So, we have some time to relax.”

Twilight pointed at Dash’s wing. A small white band was wrapped tightly around the joint that connected it to Dash’s back. Dash gave it a test flap, and was met with a shock of pain.

“I think you just sprained it. It was jerking around while we were running, so I thought it might be injured. Just don’t try to move it and you should be ok in about a day.”

Dash examined the makeshift splint more closely, and whistled. “This is actually a really good job, Twi. Where did you learn to do this?”

“Well, after Applejack ended up putting half the town in the hospital with her ‘baked bads’, I noticed how horribly understaffed the nurses were in Ponyville. So I started volunteering a few days a week.” Twilight smiled. “I can even splint a broken leg!”

“Well, thankfully that will not be necessary,” Vanille said. “I trust you are feeling better, Miss Dash?”

Twilight cleared her throat. “Dash, I think you owe Vanille something more than an ‘I guess’.”

“But, Twi! You saw that mugshot. Sure she saved us, but she still lied to us!”

Twilight sighed. “Yes, that may be. But without her, we would have been in much worse trouble than her lies brought on. I for one am willing to give her the benefit of the doubt, for now.”

Twilight smiled and put a hoof on Dash’s cheek. Dash’s eyes widened and her legs went slack. She hook her head quickly and cleared her throat.

Dash blinked. “Of course I do! That’s my second favorite one, next to the Sapphire Stone!”

Twilight giggled. “And do you remember that the thief in that book was actually one of the good ones?”

Dash sighed. She slowly rose to her hooves and turned to face Vanille. She was watching her carefully, eyebrow raised. Dash jerked out a hoof to her, but did not look at her. “Vanille, I’m… sorry. I was being a total featherbrain and jumped to the worst possible thing. You saved me and Twi, and I’d like to start over, if you’re cool with that.”

Vanille’s eyes narrowed on her hoof. After a moment, she smiled and shook it. “All is forgiven, Miss Dash. I must admit, being faced with such… incriminating evidence would lead anypony into false reactions. I promise that I have nothing but the best intentions for you two.”

“Far below the city,” Vanille said. She traced a hoof along the rough stone. “We are on the edge of the Cheval catacombs, beneath the old cathedrals.”

Vanille nodded with a smirk. “I figured you would enjoy them, even under the circumstances. I know them quite well.”

Dash raised an eyebrow, and Vanille giggled at her. “Because of my tours, miss Dash. There was a time when I frequently guided tourists down these tunnels. They have been closed for some time for restoration, but I don’t imagine we’ll run into much trouble for now.”

Twilight’s smile widened. “Oh my. I never thought I’d get to see them on this trip. This is so exciting!”

“It’s not the sewer, its what’s past the sewer! The Cheval catacombs are the oldest and largest underground tunnel system in the world, even more so than the diamond dog tunnels we’ve been able to map out.”

Dash opened her mouth to respond, when a thought struck her. “Catacomb… isn’t that a fancy word for…” Dash’s ears folded back. “Graveyard?”

“Among other things,” Vanille said. “These tunnels have served multiple purposes over the years, and we will most likely see many of them as we move through.”

*****

Vanille chuckled. “Well, we are not in the sewers like you imagined we were, but they are down here somewhere. I’ve been down here so often that I hardly notice it.”

“We have been travelling east, so we will be directly underneath the old cathedrals. The catacombs will not be far.”

Twilight grinned, and her horn brightened. “I can’t wait! I’ve read so much about these tunnels, but I never imagined seeing them up close before!”

Dash glanced around the tunnel. The tunnel hadn’t changed much since they first set off. The stale air went rotten the further they went, but it wasn’t unbearable. Dash fought against her protesting stomach with each step.

“I’m not seeing what’s so cool about this place, Twi,” Dash said. “It just looks like more smelly tunnels, like the last ten minutes of smell tunnel, and—”

Dash felt something catch her leg, and she fell forward. She landed with a grunt, and lifted her head with a shake. “Ow… what is it with me and falling down today?”

“I’m fine,” she said, getting back to her hooves. “Just tripped on something.” She turned her head to look behind her. “Probably just a rock or—”

Her eyes sprang open, her blood went cold and her heart jumped into her throat. Her lungs gasped a raspy breath as she backed away stammering, from a grimy, chattering, dirt-encrusted skull hovered in front of her face.

Her mind screeched to a halt as she looked up from her prone position, and saw Twilight holding a hoof to her mouth. She tilted her head back, and saw Vanille standing behind her, smiling, and holding the skull in her hooves. “Oh, I’m sorry, miss Dash, are you not a fan of Shakespony?”

Vanille spun the skull to face her, bouncing it to mimic the moving jaw. “Alas, poor maiden, cut down by the night’s cruel embrace. Doth wicked mare of darkness and strife plungeth our world into chaos and despair, lest the moon never wane again under the day’s mighty light.”

She finished with a sigh, and placed the skull back on the ground, and gave it a tap with her hooves. “They must have left this prop from the old tours before they shut down for the restorations. I never thought I’d see it again.”

“Of course it is. You would think me so callous to play with the remains of some poor soul?” Vanille shook her head with a frown.

Dash rolled over and stood back up. “Well, n-no, it’s just that we’re supposed to be in a graveyard and I thought…”

Vanille smiled. “I assure you, Miss Dash, that this is nothing but a harmless replica to frighten tourists.” She lifted a hoof and pointed a hoof to the wall. “Those bones, however, are no such thing.”

Dash turned her head. Behind her along the wall were large, dug out alcoves, filled to the brim with skeletons. Their emaciated forms hung out, mouths open and what remained of their flesh stretched their faces into crude grimaces.

Dash hopped back, wings upright and rigid, and ended up on her back again. Twilight was laughing this time as Dash took a moment to remember how to breathe. Twilight reached a hoof down to help Dash up, grinning. “I thought you weren’t scared of anything, Dash.”

“I’m not! It just… startled me. It isn’t often you see a wall of old bones looming over you!”

Twilight nodded, and then turned to Vanille. “You know a Midsummer’s Nightmare?”

Vanille beamed. “But of course! How could I not know one of Shakespony’s greatest tales? The story of madness and despair, of desperation and jealousy. The birth of la Cauchemare, the god’s wicked plaything to torment the lives of us ponies for their enjoyment. It is truly one of history’s greatest stories.”

Vanille raised an eyebrow. “Well, surely you do not think la Cauchemare was a blessing to us? She attempted to bring eternal night to us all. Madness!”

“Well… I think she was just lonely. All she wanted was a friend, someone who appreciated the night like she did. And nopony did. That’s why she changed. She’s actually quite nice, once you get to know her.”

Vanille froze. “But… that cannot be. “La Cauchemare was defeated a thousand years ago, how is it that you—wait… Celestia’s sister?!”

Dash smirked. “Do you guys not get the same news we do? Princess Luna’s return was a huge thing, wasn’t it?”

“Well, only ponies from Ponyville actually know that Luna was Nightmare Moon. Everypony else in Equestria just thinks Luna was her prisoner. A separate entity.”

“Well, mostly, it was to curb any distress it might have caused in the remaining noble houses in Canterlot if they thought the Lunar Rebellions were happening again.”

Dash scoffed. “Well, that’s stupid. If any pony actually talked to her for five minutes they would know she’s really cool.” Dash scratched her leg and chuckled. “I still have a small scar from when she zapped me with my own cloud. Turning my own prank against me, heh.”

Twilight giggled and turned to Vanille, who was still staring at them both in shock, and frowned. “But it seems that the story was hidden even over here for the same reason.”

“I…” Vanille said. “I’m not sure what to say. I have all of these stories of the old and new worlds. So much has changed, even in my lifetime, but I guess that I can never really know everything. Such is the price of never leaving the country, I suppose.” She nodded. “I have only heard negative things of la Cauchemare, but if she is as you say, then perhaps I will have to investigate on my own and see what is the real story.”

“Maybe you should just take a vacation,” Dash said. “Everypony needs some time off now and again.”

“Well, at least it will get you out of being chased by loony ponies for a bit.”

Dash laughed as well, but cut herself off when her ears twitched at a new sound. She glanced back the tunnel from where they came, watching and listening. A chorus of distant hoofsteps echoed against the wall, and the quiet din of angry voices.

“Zut alors!” Vanile snapped. “I did not think they would get down here so fast. Let us be going, I know a few more ways we can keep our distance.”

*****

Dash looked ahead, and indeed saw a sliver of light cascading down from the ceiling. As the three of them approached the beam of light, they saw that it came from a long shaft that climbed upwards.

“Hmm, we are getting closer to the newer tunnel systems,” Vanille said. “We are now in the underground railroad that was used to transport refugees from Germane during the rebellions.”

Vanille smiled. “It is a figure of speech. While it was not a true railroad, it served a vital purpose in the early days of Cheval.” She glanced down to the ground and scuffed the stone with a hoof. “Thousands of desperate ponies and gryphons alike stormed through these tunnels searching for safety. It is saddening to see them so darkened and ignored.”

Vanille smirked at her. “Do not tell me you are growing bored of these too.”

“N-no! Really! The tunnels are cool. But I’m just going a little stir crazy. I’d just like to poke my head out for some fresh air, if thats cool.”

Vanille glanced up. “Hmm, this should lead to a sewer cover. I think that would be fine as long as you don’t open it too far and let somepony fall in. Just don’t take too long. We have some time to rest, but I’d rather not linger if there are more of those guards down here.”

Dash nodded, and climbed up the stepping stones. when she reached the metal plate at the top, she carefully pushed it up and peered out into the street above.

She gulped down as much fresh, clean air as she could, before she scanned her surroundings.

“It’s pretty quiet right here,” she called down. “The cover is in an alley, but I can see the street.”

“Not much. There’s a huge crowd in the road. And a lot of blue decorations.”

Vanille muttered something that Dash couldn’t make out. She went to glance back down, when she saw emerging from the group of blue-tunic-wearing stallions. They were frowning and shouting at each other over the din of the crowd.

As soon as Dash recognized them, she slowly dropped the sewer grate and descended the ladder as quickly as she could.

“The guards! They're still looking for us up there too. Are these guys everywhere or what?!”

“We cannot be certain that they are the same guards.” Twilight said. “Mr. Ruby can’t possibly have all the guards under his command.” She turned to Vanille. “Can he?”

Vanille shrugged. “It’s possible, but unlikely. They might just be surveying the preparations for the celebration tomorrow.”

Dash raised an eyebrow. “What celebration? I mean, I did see a lot of decorations and crowds earlier when I was looking for help, but i had no idea it was a big thing. I just thought this was what Prance was like.”

“Ah, then you have arrived at a wonderful time. I had just mentioned to Miss Twilight that tomorrow is our queen’s birthday. It is the largest celebration we hold, and it grows larger with every queen.”

Vanille shook her head. “Pardon me for saying, while our queen is a kindly mare, we cannot possibly expect her just help a commoner and some tourists.”

Twilight nodded. She went into her bags and withdrew her sun-emblazoned book. “We’re guests of the crown under by way of Princess Celestia. We’re scheduled to meet with her tomorrow for a special exchange. Her staff would have to help us if we were in trouble.”

Vanille’s eyes widened as she stared at the book. She turned to Twilight. “Twilight…” she muttered. “It can’t be… You are Twilight Sparkle? Celestia’s personal student?”

“B-but, how can you approach the crown with somepony you know to be wanted by the guard? They can’t possibly allow me to just walk in there.”

“Then we won’t mention it,” Twilight said. “I’m sure the real guards are more capable of understanding reason, and if you are friends of ours, we can work something out.”

Vanille swallowed and glanced around slowly. She took a great deal of time peering down a series of tunnels, before she lingered on the final one and pointed at it. “We will have to exit the sewers a short distance from the palace, but I definitely know the way. We are not far from a safe exit, and can be back on the surface in a few minutes.”

*****

Dash felt a new vigor enter her body in the presence of the sunlight. She breathed deep the air she missed so much as she chased after Vanille and Twilight who kept ahead of her in the streets.

Two blocks later, they made it out of the busy markets and into a quiet lane. Dash, still in the rear, continued to keep an eye out for any who might be following them, while Vanille led them through the winding streets.

The nearby shops were brightly decorated, with banners in bright, shining blues. The lampposts had been fitted with blue lenses and gave off a gentle blue light under the afternoon sun. Citizens milled about, quietly going about their decorations as the three mares trotted along at a brisk pace.

“We are getting close,” Vanille said. “They are already preparing for tomorrow. The palace is very near.”

“Good,” Twilight panted. “Because I am not cut out for all this running.”

“I can carry you if you want, Twi,” Dash said, chuckling. “Miss Fifth Place.”

“This is exciting, no? The thrill of the chase. Running from brutish thugs. It reminds me of when I was young!”

“You don’t sound as concerned about going to the palace as before,” Dash said, frowning. “What gives?”

Vanille shrugged and kept galloping. “Your words have given me hope that all will be fine upon reaching the queen. And if I should meet my just fate, then I will accept it knowing that I have at the very least guided you two to safety from that wicked Ruby.”

Vanille giggled as they turned down a corner. She stopped and let out a satisfied sigh. “There it is! Just at the end of the road!”

Vanille broke into a sprint. Twilight groaned as she labored to keep up, while Dash merely took to the air. She spun in tight circles, shouting with glee. Vanille passed underneath her, but still she kept on until she reached the end.

She lowered her hooves and touched back to the ground, screeching to a halt just before the open courtyard. Her chest swelled as she inhaled a deep, victorious breath as she glanced around, waiting for the others to catch up.

A single, enormous building sat in the middle of the square. It was a stubby building, but it stretched across the open street. An iron bar fence traced the length of the building, capped with sharp edges shaped like the gemstone Dash had seen earlier in the gallery. The front gate had a similar crest on it over the lock. The sun was high in the sky, and its rays hit the glittering sapphire in just the right way to send a cascade of blue light in all directions.

Dash heard galloping hooves catching up behind her. She almost turned around, when something caught her eye. She squinted to focus on something standing near the gate, and her heart immediately sank.

Dash spun around, just in time to see Vanille catch up. She was still running full speed, and did not look like she was about to slow down. Dash leapt in front of her, hooves flailing. “Wait!”

Vanille planted her hooves, trying to stop. She skidded along the smooth road, and Dash placed herself in front of Vanille to help slow her down. Just as Vanille passed, Dash grabbed her around the barrel, secured her back legs, and the two mares carouselled on the spot.

Twilight was just behind, breaking off into a mild trot just as Vanille finally came to a full stop. “What’s wrong, Dash?”

“She is right,” Vanille said. She walked over to the edge of the building and stared out towards the gate. “There are some more of those stallions waiting.”

“Maybe this Mr. Ruby guy knows who we are,” Dash said. “We are kinda famous in Equestria. Even Vanille knew who we were after a bit.”

Twilight scratched her head. “If he knew who we were…” Her eyes snapped wide open. “Then he would know we’d have connections with the queen.”

“Perhaps all is not lost,” Vanille said. “I believe there is a guard house around the back. We could appeal to the crown guard directly.”

“We can back into this street and go around,” Vanille said.” It won’t take too much longer.”

Off again, they weaved back through the winding roads of Cheval passing through many other busy markets. They slowed them, but every time a delay presented itself, Vanille halted, turned, and dashed without missing a beat of her hooves on the pavement. She either ducked into an empty alley or found a secondary road through the mess of ponies with ease.

They eventually exited into a small road tracing the backside of the palace walls. The iron bars lined the street and stretched out along the road and out of sight. Dash looked up and down the road, looking for the guard post that Vanille had mentioned.

Instead, she found a divot in the fence that fed directly into the building just across from them, the border of which ran flush with a massive iron door. Vanille trotted across the road over to the door and knocked against it swiftly. Dash and Twilight followed slowly, looking around carefully.

The mares spun around. Mr. Ruby was standing there, flanked by his fellow guards. He had a self-assured grin on his face, as he took a step forward with a hoof extended.

Vanille was frowning, and sighed. “Oui, monsieur Ruby. J'ai eu ce que j’ai voulu.”

Twilight’s mouth fell open, and her eyes shrunk to pin pricks. Her lips trembled as if she was trying to speak.

Twilight didn’t answer, she twisted her head to face her, her look of horror unchanged.

Dash stared at her and spun her head to Vanille. She had turned to face them and nodded. “I think this game has gone on long enough, my friends. I no longer see any reason to keep up the facade.”

Dash’s brow arched together, as Vanille’s words processed through her brain. “This… was a trick?”

“I trusted you!” Dash snapped. “We trusted you! And you lied to us this whole time! I knew you were bad news! Why did I ever believe you?!”

“I understand just fine! As soon as you figured out we were friends with Celestia, you seemed so much more interested in moving along. What was it, did the dollar signs in your head just blind you when you realized your ransom doubled?”

“It’s bad enough that you screwed around with us, but you fought so hard to make us believe you, and this is how you repay our trust? There is one thing that is not cool with me and that’s betraying your friends!”

Dash reared her head and scratched at the ground. “Well, I got news for you, princess. If I’m going down, you’re going down with me! And I’ll die before you get your grubby hooves on my friend!”

Dash bolted into the air and charged at Vanille. She stepped back again in fright, when Dash felt a warm glow wash over her. She saw Ruby focusing his magic into stopping her, but she pressed on, flapping harder than she ever had before in her life. Her joints screamed at her, and her injured wing sent jolts of pain through her sides, but she ignored them all.

Even with Ruby’s intervention, Dash managed to crash into Vanille. They rolled over each other in the street, and Dash launched over her, thrashing and kicking.

Dash sprung to her hooves. Ruby had rushed forward to aid Vanille, but she held up a hoof to stop him. “No, I will deal with this.”

She leapt forward again, swinging out her hoof. She struck Vanille across the face and sent her to the ground. Mr. Ruby let out a strangled cry and tackled Dash. Seeing him approach her head on, Dash balanced on her rear legs and ducked down.

As Ruby sailed over her, she reared up and catapulted him into the fence. She turned to face him when Vanille shouted.

Dash spun around to see Vanille standing up. Two of the guards approached her from the sides to assist her, but she waved them off. They spoke in concerned tones, but Vanille continued to shake her head. As she lifted her head, her mane parted and Dash caught sight of a black ring forming around one of her eyes.

Vanille sighed as she rubbed her face. “I would be lying if I said I didn’t deserve that.”

“But, if you had just let me explain, we could have avoided all of this unpleasantness.”

Vanille swung out her leg and parted her cloak, revealing her saddle bags. She shrugged her back and allowed them to fall to the ground.There was a loud metallic ring from underneath her when it landed. The cloak rippled a moment, and a bright, shining object rolled out from underneath it. It rolled along the ground, skipping across the gaps in the hewn stones in front of Vanille. All eyes stared at it, as its golden glow reflected the light from the sun.

At the top of the circlet, however, was the true focus of everpony’s attention. It was a small setting, but that did little to detract from its absolute perfection. The diamond shaped gem radiated the powerful glow of sapphire blue light, much like the crown that housed it.

The sound of metal rolled over and over as the crown spun on the spot, the sound speeding up with each revolution. When it finally stopped spinning, Dash heard somepony gasp.

Vanille glanced their way and chuckled slightly. She approached the crown on the ground and placed a hoof to it, and with a graceful motion, she flicked it into the air and it landed securely on her head, perfectly aligned.

In that instant, there was a bright flash of light that enveloped Vanille, and Dash threw up a hoof to shield her eyes. When she looked back, Vanille was gone. In her place was a sapphire maned mare, sporting the jeweled crown on her head, fitting behind an ivory horn. Her dress had shifted from plain white lace to a flowing blue gown. Her eyes shimmered in the afternoon sun like radiant gems.

Dash and Twilight were staring in shock, mouths hanging open and eyes unblinking.

The sound of a throat clearing drew Twilight and Dash’s attention briefly. They turned to see Mr. Ruby and his entourage bowing. He lifted from his bow and moved to the new mare’s side and offered her a hoof, which she took and hooked around in her own.

“May I present,” Ruby said. “Her Royal Majesty, Queen Victoire the Fifth.”

Dreams and Disasters

by Quillery

Chapter Nine