(SiC) Part 5 - Pinkie Pie the Evangelist

by Brian Jacko


Pinkie Pie's Last Resort

Pinkie Pie peeked through the window and saw Rarity talking with a customer. She took out a stethoscope and put it on her head. She placed it against the wall and began to listen to their conversation.

Rarity was standing there with her red glasses on and a measuring tape hanging around her neck. "Well, if the dress wasn't one hundred percent satisfactory the first time, and since you are a new customer, then I would like to give this dress back to you fixed and for free."

"Are you serious?" the mare asked. "I don't mind paying full price, even if it was inconvenient for me to bring this dress back to you."

"Don't worry about it. I don't represent the element of generosity for nothing you know," Rarity said.

"But why? I would imagine that you spent many hours of hard labor to make this dress and then spent many more hours redoing it. Don't you want to be compensated for your work? Any other business I have been to would gladly takes my bits, even if they make mistakes. What prompts you to be so generous?'

Rarity smiled and said, "Give, and it will be given to you. Good measure, pressed down, shaken together, running over, will be put into your lap. For with the measure you use it will be measured back to you.”

"Where on Earth did you hear that from? the mare asked.

"Oh, it's only one of my most favorite verses from the Bible."

"The Bible?" the mare asked. "Is that why you are so generous? You want to be generous for God?"

"That's correct," Rarity said. "I want to be generous to others because God has been generous to me."

"That's so inspiring," the mare said. "I think I want to follow this God of the Bible."

Rarity bent over and picked up a Bible. She pushed it across the counter and said, "Here, this is a gift for you. Following God is not easy all of the time. It can be painful, hard, and even illogical sometimes, but I can promise you, that it's very much worth it!"

"Thanks so much for the Bible. I'm not very good when it comes to reading and understanding things though, especially when it comes to religion. Would you be willing to explain to me any questions that I may have? I don't live very far from here."

"I would be honored to do my best when it comes to helping you understanding scriptures. I don't have the knowledge that my one friend does, but if I can't answer every single question that you may have for me, there's a pony named Twilight Sparkle who pours so much time into reading and understanding this book. She willingly gives up much of her time and will take her own personal time to sit down and teach ponies scriptures that come to her with questions."

"Twilight Sparkle?" the mare asked. "I know who she is! I'll keep that in mind, thanks and I'll see you around!"

Rarity smiled and wished her well in her new journey with God.

Pinkie Pie took off the stethoscope and perked up as she watched the mare walk away with a dress and a shiny new Bible. Pinkie Pie put her front hoof under her chin and was deep in thought. Suddenly, something whacked her very hard against the back of her head. "Ouch!" she yelled out. "What the hay was that?"

Rarity looked out the window and said, "Oh, my goodness, Pinkie Pie. I didn't even see you when I used my magic to open the shutters. Are you ok?"

Pinkie Pie rubbed the back of her head with her front hoof and said, "Yeah, I'm fine, but that really hurt."

"What were you doing standing by this window anyway?" Rarity looked and noticed that there was a stethoscope around her neck. "Pinkie Pie! You weren't listening to my conversation through the walls with that thing, were you?"

"Uh," Pinkie Pie stammered. "Maybe?"

"Pinkie Pie! I am surprised at you! Snooping is not lady-like and that was wrong of you to do such a thing," Rarity said.

"But I just wanted to learn your secret. I need to win hearts for Jesus!"

Rarity face hoofed and said, "Pinkie Pie! I know that you can be a few apples short of a bushel sometimes, but this is just insanity! Stop trying to copy others and just be yourself! I can't promise that even if you act like yourself, that God will use you to lead other ponies to Christ. Just act like you normally do and see what happens. I really don't want to talk about this anymore. It is upsetting to me that I have been hearing from others, that you have been leading ponies away from God with your ranting and your tactics."

Rarity slammed the shutters shut and went back to her business. She also had to check on her new born son, Strong Faith.

Pinkie Pie began to walk away and talk to herself. "Be myself? Be myself? I haven't gotten anypony interested in the love of Christ and all of my other friends are doing it so well. I'm going to win one pony's heart before I leave this Earth, if it's the last thing I do!"




Pinkie Pie stood by a stallion who was dressed in a fancy tuxedo. She had a very large sack that she carried on her back. "So you like money, huh?" Pinkie Pie asked.

The stallion looked at his cutie mark that was a picture of a mound of bits. He turned back to her and said, "Yup! I love money!"

"And you don't believe in God, right?" Pinkie Pie asked

"That's correct," he said. "If there really is such a thing as Heaven, then I'm sure God will overlook all of my offesnes and see that my good works have out weighed the bad. I even give donations to charities as well, but I only do that for the tax benefits and to gain praise and adoration from other ponies so that I can have a better reputation. I'm sure that if God is real, that He will take me in when He sees how much money I have accumulated, since it will prove that I'm worth more."

"What if I told you, that if I gave my entire life savings to you right now, then you would confess your belief in God? I'm trying to be more generous like my friend, Rarity," she said

The stallion's eyes lit up with pictures of coins in them when he looked at the large sack of money that she carried on her back. "Deal!" he said.

"Do you believe in God?" she asked.

"I most certainly do!" the stallion said.

Pinkie Pie took the bag off of her back and dragged it over to him. "Here you go!" she said. "Be careful, it's very heavy."

The stallion stomped his front hoof on the ground and whistled. Within an instant, a golden chariot pulled up for him. "Put this bag of money into the chariot and take me away," he commanded to the pony pulling the chariot.

"So, this is it? I won my first heart for Jesus? Do you really believe in God now?" she asked

The stallion got inside the chariot and laughed. "Not a chance in Hell," he said. "I can't believe how gullible and desperate you are when it comes to your religion. I just did it for the money." The stallion whipped the pony pulling the chariot and said, "Away!"

"But....but....but I want a refund," Pinkie Pie said, but it was too late. The pony was well off in the distance with what was once her entire life savings. Pinkie Pie turned around and bumped into Twilight Sparkle.

"Pinkie Pie, what was that all about? What did you give that stallion?" Twilight asked.

"I-I-I gave him my entire life savings in hopes that he would be my first pony that I get to lead to Jesus," she admitted.

"You gave your entire life savings away to a pony who is already filthy rich? Did you see that golden chariot that he rode in? Do you seriously think that he needed that money? The Bible says that the love of money is a root of all kinds of evils. I hate to break it to you, Pinkie Pie, but you are being incredibly foolish."

"But Jesus said that we have to give up all of our possessions and money if we want to enter the kingdom of Heaven!" Pinkie Pie shot back.

"I reckon that commandment was fer that one particular pony alone in the Bible and not fer everypony else out there," Applejack said.

"Applejack's right, Pinkie Pie. If you're going to give everything away like that, then at least you could have given it to somepony like that over there," Twilight said as she pointed her front hoof over to where there was a poor homeless pony eating a rotten apple under a nearby tree.

Tears welled up in Pinkie Pie's eyes and her mane and tail lost its puffiness and became flat. She ran away crying.

Twilight shook her head with disappointment and said, "Come on girls, we need to help a fallen sister in the faith."

Suddenly, a loud bang of thunder rang out from the skies and rain drops began to fall to the earth.

"I almost forgot, it was supposed to down pour today!" Rainbow Dash said. "We'd better find her fast."

The girls took off, and thankfully, the rain softened the ground and they had a trail of hoof prints to follow. Even though Pinkie Pie wasn't very fast, she was a master at evading. Her mind was not planning on any trickery, but she just had to find an isolated place to get away to.