A Very Late Lunch

by Daring Deux


The Proof is in the... Soufflé?

Sugarcube Corner was a battlefield. Or at least Twilight thought that was a good metaphor. In truth she knew about as much about battlefields as she knew about how the Pinkie Sense worked—that was to say, very little. She decided, though, that she would stick to her convictions. Sugarcube Corner was a battlefield, and Rainbow Dash was losing.

Another ding of the timer, another hopeful look, another burnt offering for the trashcan. Rainbow Dash turned to her friends. “I swear I can do it!” she insisted.

“Rainbow, you’ve been trying to bake that there soufflé for three hours. Don’t you think it’s time to call it quits?” Applejack rebuked. The kitchen was covered with broken eggs, smashed fruit, and a fine layer of flour—especially strange since soufflés don’t even use flour. “Nopony likes a sore loser, Rainbow.”

“Remind me, why exactly is she trying to bake a soufflé?” Rarity inquired.

“Because it’s fun!” Pinkie said, seemingly unperturbed by the state of the Corner.

Rarity looked at Applejack. “What, don’t look at me! Twilight just told me about this the other day. I just brought the gang along.”

They all looked at Twilight expectantly. She let out a defeated sigh. “Well, It all started last Tuesday,” Twilight recalled. “I had just received a new book to add to the library’s collection—a cookbook, actually. Curious, I opened it up and this recipe caught my eye. It was for a sweet dandelion soufflé, and I had just got a batch of fresh eggs from Fluttershy—”

“Oh, you used them in a soufflé?” Fluttershy asked. “Was it tasty?”

Twilight continued, “...so, yes, I thought I’d try my hoof at the recipe. I followed the instructions carefully—I’m really good at following instructions—and it puffed up just right, too!”

“But what’s this about losing? Was there a contest, or somesuch?” Rarity asked.

“I’m getting to that. Now, I had just taken the soufflé out of the oven, and was taking measurements when Rainbow Dash chose that particular moment to come careening through my window—again—and crash into the self-help bookshelf.”

Rainbow Dash narrowed her gaze. “Hey, I was practicing a stunt! I just maybe did one or two or three spins too many. It’s not like I crash into your tree on purpose, or anything.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Anyhow, Rainbow’s entry set off an avalanche of books, which in turn deflated my soufflé. Rainbow started laughing, saying that I messed up the egg mixture—which I didn’t. So, I wondered where Rainbow got this sudden mastery of all things soufflé.” Frustration seeped into Twilight’s voice as she remembered the encounter. “Then she claims ‘Oh, I can make a soufflé in my sleep’—”

“And I can,” Rainbow Dash interjected.

Twilight shot her a sour look, full of wounded pride as deflated as her pitiful soufflé from last Tuesday. “So then I scoffed at what was clearly nothing more than hot air, and then she got all defensive and and bet that she could, and that if she did I’d have to buy her lunch. Then we scheduled this meeting.”

“Ah, very well then. But why did Applejack tell the rest of us to come?” Rarity asked.

“Well, Twi came down by the farm the day before last to buy some apples and told me about the bet, so I figured she wanted us to come, you know, to have the rest of us there to bear witness?” Applejack said with doubt creeping into her voice. “That’s how bets work. Was I not supposed to bring the others?”

“Well, I don’t know? I don’t go around making silly bets with silly ponies over silly soufflés. Ask Rainbow Dash,” Twilight said.

Rainbow fidgeted. “I don’t care, really. Does it matter now? I lost the bet, right?”

“I suppose she did, didn’t she?” Applejack asked rhetorically. “Does that mean that Rainbow has to buy Twilight lunch?”

Twilight shrugged heavily. “I don’t really care. It’s just a soufflé. Rainbow doesn’t have to buy me anything.”

“Now hold on a minute,” Rainbow said, raising her voice. “I’m a mare of my word! I lost the bet, and I am going to buy Twilight Sparkle lunch.”

“Really, Rainbow, that’s not necessary—”

“Twilight, this isn’t like your fancy linguistical nonsense. This is a bet—bets have rules. Rainbow Dash is just going to have to buy you lunch,” Applejack said matter-of-factly.



Twilight left Sugarcube Corner and headed home. Her mind dwelled on the Rainbow ordeal. Rainbow was a good friend, and it wasn’t worth jeopardizing their friendship over something as silly as a soufflé. She really just wanted to put all of this behind her, and move on. If allowing Rainbow to satisfy some code of honor would do that, she’d play along.

She was so absorbed in thought it took her a while to realize that Rainbow Dash had landed next to her and was trying to speak to her. “—a bit later?” she finished.

“A bit later, what? I’m sorry, Rainbow, could you repeat that?”

Rainbow grimaced a little. “I asked, if you wouldn’t mind moving that lunch a bit... later? I’m, uh, really busy the next couple days with... weather stuff.” Rainbow fidgeted, hopping back and forth from hoof to hoof.

Twilight thought briefly about her upcoming week. Normally she was very particular about her schedules, and was loath to include such inconvenient and immediate events. Sadly she learned quite quickly that Ponyville is very much an inconvenient and immediate place. It did not take very long before she started including a number of open slots of time for things such as this. “Well, I think this Friday should work. Is that okay?”

“Yeah, that sounds great! Did you have any place in mind?”

“Um, no. I can’t say I expected to be treated to lunch as a result of all this drama.”

“Well, I know this real-cool place that I think you’ll like.”

“Okay, it’s a date!” Twilight said.

“Wait, uh, what?” Rainbow Dash asked, blushing slightly.

“It’s an arranged meeting between two ponies at a specific time and place! You know, a date!” Twilight grinned. She liked defining words.

“Ah, I guess you’re right. It’s... a date, then.”

~ ~ ~

Twilight let loose a sandbag and carefully monitored how much altitude she gained. Piloting her hot-air balloon was finicky at times, but she enjoyed the excuse to use a barometer. She noted how much the lost sandbag affected her altitude and recorded it, making an additional note to include smaller increments of sand in future flights.

Rainbow Dash’s cloud home slid into view, and Twilight gasped. She hadn’t ever seen it from this vantage point. Rainbow clearly put a lot of time into her home. It was modeled heavily after the Cloudsdale style, with carefully carved columns cradling a number of cloud tiers. Rainbows seemed to leak out at various points, whether on purpose, or a happy accident, Twilight wasn’t certain. The entire structure seemed to represent Rainbow to a tee, beauty without a plan—like the entire thing was a happy accident, and yet couldn’t have been any other way.

Carefully as she could, she guided the balloon to the front door, smashing through some of the cloudscape on the way. Upon reaching the door, she leaned out to knock on it, only to have her hoof pass through the door as though it were made of cloud, causing Twilight to nearly topple out of the basket. She barely managed to catch on to the side, hanging precariously in the air.

She felt something get below her hooves and push her back into the basket. “Jeez, Twi, have you put on weight?” It was Rainbow Dash.

Twilight blushed. “Thanks. You, uh, saved me from quite a fall, there.”

“Don’t sweat it. Why didn’t you just cast that cloud-walking spell like you did before?”

“I, uh. Oh,” Twilight stuttered, blushing lightly.

“Hehe, I thought you were the smart one.”

Twilight chose to ignore the jab. “So, it’s about time. Are you ready to go?” she asked.

Rainbow rubbed the back of her head with a hoof. “Well, see, I was going to come by the library in about an hour...”

“But it’s already four thirty!”

“Yeah, well, aren’t you supposed to be fashionably late?”

“If you’re fashionably late to a late lunch you’re just early to dinner.”

Rainbow shrugged and gave a nervous chuckle. “Well, pass me a rope, I’ll get us going in the right direction. If, uh, you don’t mind, I have a particular place in mind.”

Twilight tossed a rope to Rainbow and fastened it to the basket. “Where is that?”

“Uh, let’s keep it a surprise?” Rainbow Dash said hopefully.

Twilight filled her glare with all the ire her otherwise empty stomach held.

“You really won’t leave well enough alone, huh? Alright, alright. It’s a place over in Cloudsdale called The Storm.”

“Cloudsdale? Rainbow, you can’t be serious.” She was. As Ponyville slid further into the distance Twilight realized that this was going to be a very, very late lunch.



~ ~ ~

By the time they reached The Storm the sun cast its last rays of light and the air grew chilly with the oncoming night. It was the first time Twilight had ever seen a sunset from so high up. The entire world stretched out in all directions like an ocean, and if Twilight looked behind her she could see the approaching night in real time. It was quite the sight.

“Are you coming, slowpoke?” Rainbow Dash called from the doorway.

Twilight gave the cloud-floor a leery glance. Even after she cast the cloud-walking spell, she still didn’t quite trust the clouds to support her. After all, it was only water vapor suspended in air, and she most certainly was much too dense to be supported by it. With a small hop, she landed and let out a sigh of relief when she didn’t hurtle down to a pancake-shaped death. The evening was going swimmingly.

The restaurant itself was constructed out of a dense-looking black storm cloud that crackled with electricity. It looked dangerous, and Twilight said as much.

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. “If it wasn’t safe, why would they let you eat in it?”

This did little to assuage Twilight’s fears. Still, seeing Rainbow Dash’s resolute demeanor did much to steady her nerves. They entered The Storm and were immediately assaulted by a barrage of new stimuli. The dark clouds crackled and pulsed, and the only sources of illumination were a single lamp on each table. A number of delicious smells wafted in from the kitchen and were the only things that prevented the establishment from feeling like a cave. A single stallion in a frilled cravate stood behind a podium and gave them a piercing look.

“Can I help you ladies?” he asked, his voice dripping in condescension.

“Yeah, I have a reservation for two,” Rainbow Dash responded.

“Name?”

“Rainbow Dash, fastest flyer in Equestria!” she said, striking a pose. “You’ve probably heard of me.”

He gave her look that oozed ‘I don’t get paid enough for this’, then checked the list of reservations. Apparently finding Rainbow’s name, he looked up. “Right this way, please.”

He led them to a table in the corner, got them seated, and told them, “Your waiter will be with you shortly.”

Twilight squinted and looked at the other tables. The place was packed with ponies wearing fancy dresses and suits, many of them casting disapproving looks their way. Suddenly Twilight felt very out of place—both literally and figuratively naked. “Rainbow, I thought you were just going to take me out to lunch. This is starting to look more like a fancy dinner.”

Rainbow Dash began to visibly sweat. “Oh, yeah. Heh. I just heard the food here was really good. And the way I see it, bits are there to be spent. If I can’t spend my bits to make my friends happy, then what use are they?”

Twilight smiled. “That’s a really nice way to look at things, Rainbow.”

“Hello!” a voice said far too loudly next to them, startling Twilight. “Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you, ladies.” A young, foppish looking pegasus stepped closer to the lamp on the table. “I’m Swift Service, and I’ll be your waiter for the evening.” He chuckled as though he had just told a joke. “Would you like anything to drink?”

“Oh, I’ll just have some wa—”

“We’ll have some lambrusco,” Rainbow Dash said with a half-hearted smile.

“And any appetizers?”

“What do you have?” Rainbow Dash responded quickly.

At this the waiter grinned like a foal and listed off a more than a dozen dishes faster than Twilight knew anypony could talk. Rainbow Dash, though, seemed unfazed.

“We’ll try some of the bruschetta.”

The waiter gave them each a menu and trotted off, leaving the mares in an an uncomfortable silence. Rainbow Dash raised the menu as a barricade, hiding behind it. Twilight decided to break the silence. “So, how did you hear about this place?”

Rainbow Dash peeked from behind her menu-aegis. “Oh, um. I, uh, heard about it on weather patrol. A lot of the pegasi in town grew up in Cloudsdale like Fluttershy and I did.”

Rainbow Dash seemed very uncomfortable. Twilight didn’t expect to see the most brave and unshakeable pony in Ponyville so... nervous. What was wrong with her?

Before she could ask, the waiter came bearing a bottle of wine and two glasses. He expertly began decanting the wine. “So how’s the date going, lovebirds?” he asked, giggling lightly.

Twilight blushed deeply. “We’re not on a date. I just won a bet is all.”

The waiter gave a hearty laugh. “Oh, of course! A bet! How foolish of me. I apologize for insinuating anything,” he said insincerely.

As he turned to leave Rainbow Dash said, “Leave the bottle,” in a voice that brooked no argument. Rainbow Dash took a sip as the waiter left, and let out a contented sigh.

“Is the wine any good?” Twilight asked, taking a sip from her glass. The taste was extremely fruity and acidic. And packed with quite a bit of alcohol, judging by the way it immediately went to her head. It reminded her of Rainbow in a lot of ways, bold, sweet, and packing a punch. She found herself enjoying the taste.

Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Nope! Just the way I like it. It’s basically over-glorified alcoholic grape juice, hehe.”

The waiter came back and quickly placed a plate of bruschetta on the table. “Have you decided on a main course?” he asked.

Twilight eyed the bruschetta greedily. It looked delicious. She grabbed a piece and took a big bite. Twilight tasted arugula and artichoke. An errant ‘mmm...’ escaped her lips as she chewed.

“Yes. We’ll split a soufflé,” Rainbow Dash said to the waiter, who in turn nodded.

“An excellent choice. It’s very... romantic to share a soufflé, and it is our specialty.” Before either of them could rebuke him he hopped away.

Rainbow Dash took a big bite from the bruschetta and her face contorted violently.

“What’s wrong?” Twilight asked.

“They overcooked the arugula and the bread is soggy,” Rainbow Dash said, looking like she was about to kick a puppy.

“Tastes fine to me,” Twilight said, chewing contentedly. “What’s with the sudden high standards, Rainbow?”

Rainbow shrugged and poured them each another glass of wine from the bottle. After a few minutes of Twilight eating the bruschetta and Rainbow drinking the wine the waiter appeared carrying a large, puffy soufflé that crackled—quite literally—with energy. Twilight was impressed, but Rainbow Dash looked impassive.

“Dig in quickly, the added storm magic makes it a very... volatile meal,” the waiter said. “Enjoy.”

Rainbow and Twilight each took a bite at the same time. It was unlike anything she’d tasted before. It shocked her as she put it in her mouth, numbing her taste buds somewhat. After the initial shock, though, it tasted like... Twilight struggled to draw any parallels. She decided the closest comparison would be like taking a bite out of a rainy day.

“What is this? A joke?” Rainbow asked, nearly yelling. “Who cooked this piece of—”

“Rainbow...”

“No! I want to see somepony about this.”

Rainbow could be impossible sometimes. “Rainbow, what’s gotten into you?”

She heard a rumble reverberate through the restaurant. She assumed it was just the storm cloud until she saw him. He was easily the most massive pegasus Twilight had ever seen. Perched atop his head was an equally massive and frilly chef’s hat. “Which one of you two was talkin’ about my soufflé?” he rumbled.

“We, uh—”

“It was me,” interrupted Rainbow Dash, getting up from her seat. “Were you the one who made that... thing?”

“That thing is the best soufflé in the city!”

“If that is the best in the city, I’m glad I moved!”

The chef swung a massive forelimb at Rainbow Dash, who managed to dodge the blow.

“Oh, it is on.” The only thing Twilight saw was a rainbow-colored blur slam into the stallion. Their movements were too erratic to follow in the dim light, but the sound of their struggle echoed through the restaurant mixing oddly with the rumble of the storm cloud..

Twilight felt a tap on her shoulder and gave a start. It was the waiter. He leaned in and whispered, “I think you and your marefriend should probably leave.” Quick and silent, he proceeded to place himself between the two hotheads. “Now, now, Gust. What would Snowdrift say if she saw you fighting again?”

Rainbow began to struggle to get past the intervening waiter when Twilight got up, grabbed a hold of Rainbow’s mane and forcefully dragged her outside.

“Hey! What gives—”

Twilight stopped her with a glare.

Rainbow Dash let loose a frustrated scream, turned, and flew to the balloon. Twilight was confused. Something was clearly bothering her. Twilight didn’t know if she could help, but she was going to try. She trotted over to the balloon. Rainbow had her head hanging over the side of the basket, casting a dejected look over the Cloudsdale skyline.

“Sorry for being such a feather-brain, Twilight,” she said without turning around.

“What happened? You’ve been acting strangely all night. Is something wrong?” Twilight asked, placing her hoof on Rainbow’s shoulder.

“No, it’s. Ugh.” Rainbow Dash turned and looked at Twilight. Twilight had never seen her seem so utterly defeated before. “Can I tell you something?” she asked.

Twilight nodded immediately. “Of course you can. You can always tell me anything.”

Rainbow took a deep breath and held it in for a few seconds. “I’ve-kind-of-liked-you-for-a-really-long-time-now,” she said all at once. Rainbow let out a sigh. “Wow, that feels good to get off my chest.”

All Twilight could manage was, “Wait... what?”

Words seemed to come more easily to Rainbow after that. “Yeah, didn’t you find it weird that I kept on crashing into the library? I wasn’t going to go there for a book, you know. I’m no egghead, Twilight.”

“But the bet. Wasn’t that like a fight?”

“What? No. I mean. Maybe? Not in a bad way, at least.” Rainbow sighed and applied her hoof to her face. “Let me try to explain what happened. I crashed into the library, all according to plan, and I saw you had made a soufflé. I love soufflé. My mom taught me how to cook them when I was a foal. Heck, I practically grew up in the kitchen.”

“Well, that explains food-critic Rainbow Dash,” Twilight mused.

“When we set up the bet, I was super stoked for it. I had this plan where I was going to tell you how I felt, and we were going to make a soufflé, and it was going to be so awesome. Then it turns out Applejack dragged the rest of the gang there, and, well, I couldn’t stick to the plan. Twilight, I haven’t told anyone I actually know anything about cooking. I don’t want to seem like an egghead. So, when the others showed up, I kind of freaked out and just started making as big of a mess as I could. I just kind of played it by ear until Applejack brought up the bet again, so then I had a plan, if I had lost the bet then I could still get a chance to open up.”

“Why take me all the way out here?”

“Heh, I just wanted to find something new and exciting for you. And I sort of figured Dinner would be more romantic, or something?” She rubbed the back of her head. “I... didn’t really think it through, though. I didn’t realize that if I took you late to an already late lunch, you’d be so hungry and grumpy. You’re a lot better at planning things, Twilight. I just kind of wing it.”

Twilight chuckled, “Rainbow, I had no idea.”

“But, of course I botched it!” she said, throwing her hooves up. “The place I picked out was terrible! Worst date ever!”

“Oh, it wasn’t all bad.” Twilight leaned in and lightly kissed Rainbow Dash. “We can always try again next week.”