CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
AN ASSESMENT AND A SUMMONS
Breakfast that morning became more of a Staff Meeting. The Scroll, it turned out, was written in Capers’ hoofwriting. Xantippe recognized Capers’ odd tendency to print Standard in capital letters at once. The Wardroom as well as the crew in the Galley greeted my reversion to normalcy with almost jaded acceptance… as if this sort of thing was becoming routine in Starfleet! Merry wanted to start a pool to see what I would be next week. … I told her exactly what she could do with her granola after she stuffed it into a wad of steel wool first! She took the comment, as she did Caper's, in the spirit in which it was offered. Some Ponies!
Xantippe wasn’t helping, either. “Next time, to enhance your aura, you might end up as a noble Zebra!” Maybe it was my guilty conscious, but there was something deep within her eyes that made me wonder just how much Luna took from my dream… and who she spread it around to! When I noticed Sunny looking at me looking at her I braced for the expected kick to my shin. But Sunny only waggled her spoon at the Yoemare who smiled quietly and turned her attention to eating her apple. The Mare in my head hooted and clapped her hooves, calling up something on her personal display I couldn’t make out from this angle. From the way she stared I just knew there were stripes involved!
Celestia must really give Luna a hard time!
Jerry snapped me out of my reverie.
“Five hundred and thirteen light-years in three days is a physical and arcane impossibility! We’d have to maintain a speed Time Warp thirty-nine…”
“Thirty-nine point six-seven.” Sekkack supplemented, munching on an artificial meat stick.
“Add all the decimal points you want…” Jerry treated the Vulcan to a glare. “Even with our computer working at one hundred percent efficiency and with the best Arcane enhancement to the crystals I couldn’t give us much more than Warp fourteen. Even then we couldn’t hold it for more than an hour or so at best! At Warp thirty-nine our Warp Field would be so tight we’d be squirted at our destination in a spray of tachyons and neutrinos… and a fat lot of good we’d do anypony in that state!” He shoved his empty cereal bowl away and rolled his apple behind it. Tyllae pounced on it and brought it back to give the bulk of the unwanted fruit a good home in her tummy.
“Ok.” Evee said, putting her own empty bowl on the serving cart Bob brought in. Tyllae, her cheeks bulging with apple, looked up eagerly but Evee folded her hooves protectively around it and continued. “We can’t make the rendezvous there so is there any way for us to predict its future course? Maybe we can intercept it.”
I made a face and tapped the open scroll. “Caper knows what the Ship is capable of so he must have been thinking along the same lines. With Discord at the Helm there’s no way of telling which way the damn thing’ll jump but Caper noted its last four major course changes and at no time did it make more than a forty-degree turn.” I suppressed a sigh. “To make things more complicated its velocity changes unpredictably, as well as its physical dimensions. Its speed varies between point three sublight and Time Warp six. Its size alters from a little over seven million miles to more that one-and-a-half light years, and no, there is no correlation between size, speed, and maneuverability. This thing is an abomination in the eyes of Physics!” I said in disgust, tossing off a glass of apple juice like it was sour cider.
“The shifting parameters of its physical size is most probably a consequence of the nature of whatever adjacent Universe is interacting with our own at a given instant. Like a three-dimensional object being perceived from a two-dimensional point of view.” Sekkack mused, steepling his fingers and looking thoughtful. “Were it not for the urgency and danger of the task before us this would be an excellent opportunity for us to gather unparalleled and unique scientific data that could further immensely the field of Quantum Physics.”
I appreciated the Vulcan’s ‘Flatland’ reference but I doubted any of the others did, though Jerry was jolted out of his frown when he said it he didn’t comment.
“The vast majority of our Sensory will be devoted to the modifications that, we hope, will allow us to deal with Discord.” I conciliated. “What’s left will, I assure you, be devoted to learning what we can. If… big if… we make it that far I’ll make sure you have first crack at the data. There’ll be enough for at least a dozen research papers in there I’m sure!”
“I look forward to the opportunity, Acting Captain.” He nodded gravely.
“Roight!” Merry dusted her hooves. “All we gotta do is head off a bleedin’ runaway Stellar Phenomena and doyve down its bleedin’ throat after we put down the biggest bloomin’ mad dog dragon-critter in the Galaxy! Piece of apple cake eh, eh?”
“That’s why we get the big credits, Merry!” I told her. “If it was easy anypony could do it!”
“Me old Dad always said Oy’d come to a bad end!” Merry shook her head. “Well… reckon this foight’ll be worth it, eh?”
We’re not dead yet, Mate!” I gave her a wink that earned me a more-or-less stifled guffaw. “This Ship has come through a lot and we’re still here. We have the advantage of knowing who and what we’re dealing with now and we’ll have allies once we breach this… Nexus of Realities. We just have to hang in there to that point.”
“We’re about as ready as we’ll be.” Jerry put in. “The balephaser banks are as modified as we can manage. The problem is that the emitters are made to project nadions, if we bump up the power too much either way they won’t be nadions any more! As it stands as of now we’ll either be pumping a coherent warp field out of them or a semi-coherent inertial damping field. Either way they simply aren’t made for that. You can’t turn an old-style shotgun into a sandblaster and expect it to last! …And don’t think re-enchanting the balefire elements hasn’t been a little slice of paradise, either!” He grumped. “I wouldn’t even know what to call them at this point! Weaponized subspace emitters are more properly duotronic countermeasures. These things’ll have more range but they’re horribly inefficient and if we’re not careful about which frequency we blaze away on we can screw up our own Warp Coils in the process.”
I poured myself another glass of juice and set my own apple in front of the Bottomless Fey who had just about done for Jerry’s.
“Don’t mince words, Jerry. Tell me what you really think!”
Jerry had the good grace to look sheepish. “Ok, ok! There isn’t much wiggle room in the safety margin and it won’t have nearly the range of a balephaser, but it’ll work. … I just hope somepony from Starfleet Engineering Corps doesn’t get a look at the shambles we had to make out of the balephaser assemblies. They’d bust me back to shuttle mechanic third class!”
“We’ll write it off as battle damage!” I assured him. “Our biggest problem is trying to put ourselves in the way of the Nexus. How much can we get out of the Time Warp Drive?”
“That’s a whole ‘nother set of problems.” Jerry said, settling back in his chair wearily. “We’ve been replicating new modules to replace the ones contaminated by Discord. I haven’t even tried to recycle the old ones! Given the nature of what he did to them I don’t want to get them near any duotronic device. When we first started replacing them I loaded the bad modules onto an antigrav cart to haul them away. Next thing I knew the damn thing took off on its own trying to pulp my Engineers against the bulkheads! All it takes is close proximity and it just jumps into another device. Now we just put the infected module on the deck and hit it with a maximum-power balephaser blast! It’s safer that way!”
I blinked. “Wow. I had no idea!”
“Well, you’ve had your hooves full with your own problems, haven’t you?” Jerry smiled wanly. “We’re handling it but the going is slow. You’ll remember that I warned you that the Main Computer modules are incredibly delicate things to replicate. The molecular tolerances involved are right on the thin edge of our capacities. We’re only getting a sixty percent success rate for our efforts. On top of that we’re integrating the new components into a currently running system, in effect upgrading a computer without shutting it down! It’s a ticklish business but we’re making it work.” He paused to rub the bridge of his nose. “I can and am giving you Warp Six point one. If the next set of modules comes out I can give you Warp Eight with Warp Eleven for brief emergencies. If not, all I can promise is a little over Warp Nine, call it two hundred and fifty-six days to cover the distance… and I can only give it to you for a few hours. That’s all I and my Ponies can do until we get our next shipment of miracles. Deliveries had been kinda slow lately.” Jerry smiled and I finally noticed the lines around his eyes that were never there before.
“Have you been getting any sleep, Jerry?” I asked softly.
“Enough.” He lied. “I’ve been developing a real taste for that Sparkle-Cola Rad. Running to the bathroom all the time keeps me awake! Don’t worry, Starry, it’s no worse than cramming for exams!”
“Uh-huh.” I said. “Look, I’m brevetting Melody to Science Officer in an hour or so. I’ll have her free up some Ponies to help with the Computer situation. We all need you and yours in the best shape possible for what’s coming. Check with her around ten hundred hours.”
Jerry raised his hooves. “Hay, you’ll get no complaints from me! Far be it from me to look a gift…”
“What am I, chopped vort?” Bors demanded, the mauve ribbons on his chin quivering with all the hot air he was generating. “I have an A-4 Computer rating even on these overthought Federation systems! I would be worth at least three Ponies when it comes to the repairs… if your Chief Engineer isn’t afraid of being embarrassed by superior Tellarite know-how!” Bogan stood as near to the table as his paunch allowed and glowered a challenge at Jerry.
For his part, the Chief Engineer reared up like his favorite antique soldering iron just burned him! “Are you kidding me? You never even saw a duotronic computer until you came aboard this ship!”
“Bah! A Logic Circuit is a Logic Circuit whether it’s in a quantum format or not!” Bors scoffed, rolling a hairy eye toward me with the shaggy ghost of a wink. “Admit it! You’re afraid of competition!”
Sekkack, doubtless having experience with the sort of situations Bors got involved with, interjected himself into the conversation smoothly. “I possess an A-5 rating and, of course, offer my services to the Engineering Department as my duties in the Science Section allow.” He folded his paws in his lap serenely and continued. “However, I feel it is my duty to clarify a previous comment on the part of my colleague. When he says that he is equal to three Ponies he was obviously referring to his mass and not, as he may have been misinterpreted, to his technical prowess.” It must have been an artifact of the lighting in the Wardroom that caused that seeming twinkle in the Vulcan’s eye…
I cut Bogan off as he swung himself toward Sekkack who only looked up expectantly. “Congratulations! You’ve both been assigned to assist with the Computer repairs. Consider it to be your top priorities.” I turned a stern eye to the pair of Aliens. “If I don’t see an immediate increase in productivity, gentlebeings, I’m sure Commander Jerry-Rig will find you something to do more in line with your abilities… like recycling machinery maintenance, maybe. Am I coming through loud and clear?”
“Acknowledged, Acting Captain.” Sekkack nodded.
“If you don’t see a two hundred percent increase I’ll trim off my chin-locks!” Declared Bors.
I looked around the Wardroom, gathering my Friends up with my eyes. “I know things have been rough and you’ve all been working very hard indeed and I appreciate all your efforts. I’m not about to insult your intelligence by trying to make you believe that we’ve gained the upper hoof with our preparations. This race is still neck and neck. Discord has to stop us and we have to win. Both sides have everything to lose… but we have all our loved ones back in the Federation counting on us and Discord only has what’s left of himself. That’s the edge we have on him. We’re in this not only for ourselves but for the billions back Home. Friends and Family matter more than Self-Indulgence and hollow Vengeance. He’s Powerful, frighteningly so… but we Care. We just have to hang on long enough to Get This Job Done.” I smiled a lopsided grin. “That’s my pep talk! Star, see what you can do about predicting where this thing’ll be and run up some intercept courses. You can bounce some ideas off me on the Bridge. I’ll be working with Melody fine-tuning our Sensor modifications. Let’s get back to work, Ponies!”
Bob had come back to gather the dishes. Tyllae had been busy ferrying gnawed-to-death apple cores to the refuse bin on his cart. As I wrapped up, she zoomed over to tug on my sleeve.
“Starry, Starry, Starry!”
“You can’t still be hungry! Look, Squirt, we only have a couple of years of food onboard…”
“No, no, no!” Tyllae waved a hoof and shook her head violently, only all the ballast she’d just taken on kept her from spinning out of control. “Tyllae hassa idea, a big, big, big idea! Tyllae lissened to alla Ponies an Tyllae knows now what Star-Wind wants Tyllae to do, yep, yep, yep! Tyllae knows how to get Her-mees where Luna wants!”
“All right! Calm down!” I offered her a hoof to perch on. “What do you have to do?”
The little Fey settled her rump into my palm and beamed up at me. “Tyllae gotta write a letter, Starry! Tyllae figgered out what Star-Wind told Tyllae. Tyllae can help but Tyllae gotta write a letter first to getta big, big, big surprise for poor old Discord!”
“Seems to me that all ‘em apples she ate turned to brandy in ‘er stomach!” Merry chuckled, then gave Jerry a dig in the ribs. “Wish Oy could get the ‘ang of that trick! Be a roight, proper time saver eh? Eh?”
“Hush, Merry!” I brought the Faery up to eye level. “Tyllae, you do know the nearest thing to a Post Office is back on Earth, don’t you? Nopony sends letters any more.”
“Gotta be a letter!” The Fey said stubbornly. “Gotta be able to read it, Starry! Trust Tyllae! Tyllae not stoopid, Tyllae knows what gotta do! Why don’t silly Ponies ever take Tyllae serious when poor, poor, poor Tyllae jus wanna help?” She got up and pranced on all fours in frustration.
“Tell ya what, Short-Stack!” Merry called out. “You wroite it up and Oy’ll transmit it moyself. Where’s it gotta go?”
“Jus gotta go out!” Tyllae pointed at the ceiling. “Out beyond Discord’s Magic!”
“Who are you sending this to, Squirt?” I wondered.
“Ekzackly!” The Fey nodded emphatically.
I sighed, knowing beyond a shadow of a doubt that this wasn’t going to get any clearer. I gestured to Xantippe who produced a padd out of the bag that she always carried.
The Yoemare patted the table next to her. “Come down here, Tyllae Dear. You recite and I shall write.” She snuck Sunny a knowing look. “At the risk of causing consternation, I’ve got quite the reputation for dictation!”
I facehoofed and blushed as the Fey leapt down. Sneaking my own glance around the table I was relieved to see only Sunny reacted to that statement, coughing delicately into her napkin. Mercifully, everypony else just looked confused.
Tyllae looked up at Xantippe. “Gotta rhyme?”
“No, little Fey, I will only write what you say.” The Zebra said gently.
“Oakey-dokes!” Tyllae cleared her throat and began. “Tyllae an Tyllae’s friends all need help! Discord gonna make everything bad, bad, bad for everybody! Tyllae needs help to help all Tyllae’s nice, nice, nice friends. Tyllae remembers enough not to ask for big, big, big hurry. Tyllae knows Doctor always comes in Time! Pee-Ess, Tyllae will make sure to have plenny of muffins!” She said brightly, then turned to Xantippe. “All done! Tyllae thanks!” She nuzzled the Zebra’s hoof in gratitude.
The Yoemare rolled her eyes to me silently.
“Tyllae.” I asked gently. “Who is the ‘Doctor’?”
The little Fey flitted up in front of my nose and noddled. “Thassa ‘zackly right, Starry! Yep, yep, yep!”
I contemplated the little mite with crossed eyes for a moment before extending my hoof for the padd. To be honest, my initial impulse was to swat her with it! We just didn’t have the time to indulge in Faery nonsense just then! ...Then I remembered how she charged in just to save Sunny and me. I remembered just what that heroic act cost the dear, little Fey. There was more to Tyllae than the perpetually hungry, silly-from-our-standpoint, almost unbearable cutesy thing that was all we could superficially see. There was nothing superficial about her. It’s a shame that History forgot the Fey as completely as it forgot the Goddesses. I couldn’t say with certainty that the best parts of what makes us Ponies were inherited from the ancient Little People who tried so hard to keep our forbears safe to make up for their archaic mistakes. Uncounted millennia later, the Very Last Faery hovered before me, still helping as best she could. It wasn’t her fault we didn’t understand how she did things. It certainly wasn’t an excuse to stop trusting her now!
I took the padd from Xantippe and slid it across the table to Merry.
“Deploy a marker buoy and have a hardcopy of this inside. Set it to transmit this message in plain text on all frequencies, just to improve our chances.” I said in the silence that filled the Wardroom. “Will that work all right, kiddo?”
“Thatta be just fine, Starry!” She whirled in place to address the room. She didn’t need to be an Empath or even a Vulcan to pick up on the undercurrent of skepticism. “Tyllae promised to help… longa time ago Faeries promised to help Ponies forever! Tyllae not the best Faery ever, nope, nope, nope! But Tyllae still tries even when Ponies think Tyllae all loco inna coco! ‘Sokay! Tyllae loves Ponies an never, never, never gonna quit! Neither should Ponies! Poor, poor, poor Discord gave up long ago after only one little try! Tyllae thinks Ponies are much, much, much better than Ponies realize. Better inna different way than Faeries! Tyllae wanna make sure Ponies stay around long enough so Tyllae can see how better!” She fluttered backwards to land in the palm she somehow knew I’d extended for her. “Tyllae just wanted to say that to all Tyllae’s friends. Tyllae thought alla nice, nice, nice Ponies should know. Whew! Tyllae is pooped!” She folded her legs and I rubbed her tiny head with my thumb as she gave every indication of getting ready to nap. I looked around expectantly.
“Questions? Comments?” I didn’t mind that all eyes on the room rested on Tyllae. I was genuinely touched when I noticed the looks of resolve tinged with tenderness and pride in the Wardroom.
“Oy got one!” Merry raised a careless hoof. “Yer all roight, Tilly! Roight bonzer sort!” She glanced around the room speculatively and made a point of cracking her knuckles. “Anypony don’t think so can meet me in the gym later. Bring yer pals! …And ya better bring yer bleedin’ ‘A’ games!”
“I don’t know about you guys…” Evee spoke up. “But after the Romulans and all, it’s nice to know that somepony thinks we’re worth the trouble!”
“We Tellarites recognized your worth from the very first moment!” Bors said breezily. “That’s why we let you ally with us!”
Sekkack gave him a glance that was neither annoyed nor pitying. “As I recall, the Tellarites reported that they had ‘conquered’ the Equine Race upon their First Contact… which came decades after the Vulcan Race became the first species to open diplomatic relations with Earth. Relations based on our admiration for their indomitable spirit, I would add.”
“Bah!” The Tellarite snorted. “The Vulcans sat on their hands while Earth fought two Global Wars! They didn’t even bother to talk with them until they saw the Earthlings test their Warp Drive Prototype!”
“A prototype they made available as a gesture of goodwill to all.” Sekkack countered. “We were deeply impressed by their altruism.”
“Bugger th’ lot o’ ye!” Sunny made it a point to keep her voice at a conversational level although her expression positively thundered! “Can ye no see th’ wee thing’s tryin’ t’ sleep? Gi’ me th’ wee Darlin’ n’ I’ll take her wi’ me t’ Sickbay. Fine way t’ be thankin’ her for her efforts, th’ poor Lassie!” Both aliens shut up, Bors cringing and Sekkack nodding his head in grave apology.
I handed her off to Sunny. I knew better than to point out that, when she puts her mind to it, Tyllae could sleep through an explosive decompression!
Jerry got up. “If Tyllae’s going to stick up for us I can at least make the mess look orderly! Let’s hope this Doctor is an Engineer!”
Hope is the Order of the Day!” I agreed. “Let’s go, Ponies! We’ve got a full day waiting for us.”