15 Days remaining
Twilight stared at the tabletop blankly. Her front hooves hung at her sides while she sat. The look in her eyes could be described best as defeated. Her mind still rattled from the events from earlier. A heavy weight sitting on her shoulders caused her to sag in her seat.
Behind her Octavia poured water from a kettle into a mug. A tea bag floated through the brown, murky water. A moment later she brought the glass over, setting it in-front of Twilight. Shakily she gripped the porcelain between two hooves, tipping it back.
Octavia seated herself. Her front hooves folded in front of her, she watched Twilight drink. The pair silent. Twilight drank until there was nothing left in the mug. She set it down on the table, staring at her hooves. The silence persisted. Twilight staring blankly forward. Octavia studied Twilight with an unreadable expression, unbenounced to Twilight.
Finally Twilight sat back, leaning in her chair. She rubbed her hooves across her eyes. Then through her mane. Across her muzzle. Through her mane again. Something to touch or to keep her hooves busy.
“What exactly happened?” Octavia broke the silence. Her tone gentle and open. Twilight rubbed her eyes, gently shaking her head. “I was... careless.” She finally croaked. “I didn't pay attention. I should have noticed the signs.” Twilight breathing grew faster and louder. Her eyes widened in near panic. “I was ignorant. I was stupid. I didn't think. I didn't take precautions. I didn't-”
Octavia moved one hoof in front of Twilight muzzle, silencing her. “Calm.” She corrected the near frantic unicorn. “Deep breaths. Stay calm.” Twilight gripped her partners hoof between hers, holding it close to her like a filly clutching a teddy bear. Her large, gasping breaths slowing. She closed her eyes, drawing several shaky breaths.
“I was careless. And I didn't pay attention.” She repeated. Octavia scooted closer. “Don't say that.” She tried, gently. But it was to no avail. “No. It's true.” Twilight sat up. She let out a heavy breath. “I shouldn't have been so careless. As if she would go that easily. And without a fight...” She put her head into her hooves once more.
Octavia wrapped one hoof around Twilight's shoulder. “Twilight, look at me.” She said gently. Slowly the violet unicorn raised her heavy head. She met her partners eyes and felt her sadness slowly slip away. Octavia gave her a small, hopeful smile.
“You need to get out. You've been on your own for years. Sitting inside this house, and going Celestia knows where at night.” Twilight gave a small wince at Octavia's choice of words, but Octavia didn't continued. “It's time you got out. You should come with me to the market tomorrow.”
Twilight's expression turned to one of unsureness, but Octavia silenced her with a raised hoof. “No arguing. You been alone with yourself to long. Even if you don't talk to anypony you need to be with others, not just me or yourself. Just walk and take it all in. Don't worry about Her.” She said, tapping her hoof against Twilight's forehead. “Or your 'mission.' It's time you took a break from everything.”
Twilight stared at her opposite still wanting to argue. Instead an agreeing smile took place. “Your right.” She chuckled taking a deep breath. “I'll go.” Octavia gave her a wide smile. “Good. Tomorrow afternoon then?”
Twilight smiled, giving as curt nod. “To Tomorrow afternoon will be fine.”
“Now then.” Octavia began. “I have another show Tomorrow. I think it would be wise if you came along. I'm not sure if you should be alone at night. Not for long anyway” Twilight nodded in agreement.
“Also. I have a meeting at book club tonight, which I know you won't want to go to since...” Twilight stood. Slowly she made her way to one of the kitchen windows and stared out into the street. “I'm not sure if I can. She finally spoke after a long silence. "As badly as I want to, I can't risk it. It's better if I don't even see her. It will just complicate things.” Her mouth curled into a frown. Octavia stood from her seat, making her way towards Twilight.
“Your a master of disguise, Twilight. You could come with me and just watch us. You wouldn't even have to join in.” Twilight shook her head gently. “So badly I want to. You can't imagine how badly I want to just see her, but... I just can't do it, Octavia. I can't bear to see her sadness.”
Octavia hung one leg over Twilight's neck. “You have nothing to worry about. There is rarely a time when she isn't smiling. Velvet is one of the most loving, caring ponies I know.” Twilight lent against Octavia. “I know. And you're right, but...The ponies I met in my travels. The things I've seen. The things I've done.”
A tear leaked from under on eye. “I've learned to see through the masks, ponies wear. Sadness like that never goes away. Burdens are never truly lifted off a ponies shoulders. Not like that. I don't want to have to deal the seeing that. Sadness and despair leave scars that never heal. That can never be erased. I've seen that look on so many before. Ponies I had never met. Their faces ingrained into my memories forever. I can't bear to have that image when I think of my mother.” Twilight threw her legs around Octavia, locking the pair in a tight embrace.
“I can't, Octavia.” She cried. Tear flowing down her cheeks. “I just can't.”
Octavia stood there as the strongest pony she knew broke down in front of her, like a filly waking up from a bad dream. She returned Twilight's strong grip. Tears at the edge of her eyes, now threatening to fall. “I understand.”
Rainbow rocketed through the sky, towards the palace. Her mind was on autopilot. She didn't think, or even try to at that... Just flying. The feeling of the wind in her mane, her feathers brushing against her fur, the cool air trying to strip away her feelings of stress, anger, and exhaustion. The emotions still raking her body, causing her to sag and slouch even as she flew.
By the time she had reached the steps to Canterlot Castle she felt 50 pounds heavier. A flight that normally took her 10 minutes on a slow day had taken nearly 30. Wearily she began to climb the stairs, opting to begin the slow assent and not fly so that she could gather herself to look presentable in front of the other guards and the princess.
Once she had reached the top, she had mostly accomplished the task, but there was a gap that still hadn't been filled. The guards that manned the great door even noticed it, subtle as it was. Her fierce, hawkish stare was toned down, her well known commanding swagger was slightly off, and her normally piercing gaze was much more gentle and tired.
The posted guards, who were much more known for their strength and booming voices and not their brains, knew enough to not ask questions and simply let the good commander in. Slowly she made her way through the halls until she was outside Cadence's room, which was flanked by two guards. She stood in front of the two, expecting them to let her in. When they didn't she spoke, “Well?” She demanded. “What are you waiting for.”
“Princess Cadence is currently out.” The guard to the left gruffly responded. “She has taken leave for the next few days, along with Captain Shining Armor.” Rainbow breathed a sigh of annoyance. “What? That's it? They just, up and left?” She demanded. “I apologize Commander, but that's all that we were told.” The other guard finished, somewhat apologetic.
“Very well then.” She gave an exasperated sigh before turning and walking away, her head hung in frustration. Slowly she made her way back through the long halls of the castle, cursing her bad luck. As she walked, just like when the had been flying, she hadn't paid much attention to her destination. She had expected to walk out of the castle, but much to her surprise they had picked a different destination for her.
When she looked up she was shocked to not the Canterlot skyline and cityscape, but the doors leading into Luna's private room. The guards that were normally outside her room were gone. Rainbow Dash stood alone outside of her mentor's room. Her eyes never leaving the door.
Just a few steps away was help. She could reach out and go inside. She could apologize, she knew Luna would forgive her. She knew Luna could help her. But...
'But why?' The voice in her mind called. 'Why should you apologize? You weren't in the wrong. You were simply trying to finish you mission. Bring a murderer. A Psychopath. She made you angry. Humiliated you in front of the other princesses and Shining Armor. If anything, she should be apologizing to you.'
Rainbow Dash stared at the door, in silent shock and wonderment. 'That's right.' She thought darkly. 'It's not my fault. I'm being punished for following orders. Simple as that.'
With a look of disgust and loathing, she tore herself away from the large door, standing up straighter than she had been earlier. Maybe some training would suit her better.
A quiet clop, clop, clop accompanied her hooves as they struck the smooth floor.
'Isn't it?'
Later that night
Octavia slowly rose from her seat at the Canterlot library. Around her other mares, young and old mingled together, chatting and smiling. She was the only who had been sitting in the circle of chairs around her. The other standing around her, chattering away. She smiled and still sat quietly as her friends stood around her talked about stories and books.
“Octavia?” An excited voice called from behind her. She turned to see two identical mares standing behind her. “Flora, Fauna.” She addressed both of the turquoise and light green earth ponies, wide smiles dominating their features. “How are you?”
The one on the left, Flora, responded. “Absolutely wonderful since the news. Aren't you excited? Isn't it just wonderful?” She almost yelled, earning her a stiff glare from a nearby librarian. She gave an apologetic sheepish smile to the offended worker.
Octavia, for her part, was lost. “Flora, what are you talking about.” A curious smile taking place.
This time Fauna spoke. “What do you mean? We just heard from Velvet. She was looking for you earlier, but couldn't find you. She told us we could tell if we made sure it was just you.”
Octavia cocked her head slightly, still in wonderment. “Flora? Fauna? What in the wide world of Equestria are you talking about.”
Twilight sat at the table, staring down at her hooves, her eyes wide. The only light piercing the darkness of the cold winter night was a small lamp, sitting a few feet away.
She didn't want to sleep, not alone anyway, for fear her demon would return and she wouldn't have anypony to save her.
It would be just her.
All alone.
Poor. Weak. Twilight Sparkle.
Scared and Alone
Helpless in her power
So weak and defensless
Tired and helpless
Ripe and ready to be picked off
click
Twilight stood suddenly tipping her chair as she spun around. The front door and the heavy wind blew in a flustered Octavia, wrapped up in her winter cloak. Barely before she had crossed the threshold to her home did she jump as Twilight's chair clattered to the floor.
She quickly looked to the fallen chair then to Twilight. The pair locked eyes or a moment before a gust of wind blew a small torrent of snow into the already cool house. Octavia swiftly turned and slammed the door shut, ending the blast of wind and severing their locked gaze. Twilight turned back towards the table with a huge sigh.
A moment later Octavia stood next to her. “Twilight.” Octavia said breathlessly. Twilight turned towards her meekly, but upon seeing Octavia's expression she became confused. Octavia stood with an expression that screamed shock, happiness, and surprise.
“O-Octavia?” Twilight asked, concerned.
“Twilight?” She asked in the same breathless voice. “How would you feel about being a big sister?”