“Oh, don't get me wrong, it's an innovative use of dragonfire.” said Flam. “I just think that the message could have been phrased a little better.”
“Seemed fine the way I had it.” said Spike, balancing on his tail and preparing what was known as 'jack-hammer digging' (1).
“Well,” said Flam, “it would no doubt have been sufficient, if there were any chance of your correspondent -”
Flam stopped for a few minutes, while the sound of Spike's diamond-tipped tail thumping rapidly against the metallic floor drowned out all possible conversation. After some time, Spike stopped.
“- if there were any chance of your correspondent actually finding my brother.” finished Flam. “We're not – well – not always the most popular of ponies, and after my sudden disappearance, Flim would probably have gone to ground. And when my brother goes to ground, well, Celestia herself would have trouble finding him...”
Spike looked down, and frowned. “Hmph. Not even scratched.” Then he glance up, and grinned widely. “Wanna bet?” he asked.
“Wait, are ya saying ya don't know where Spike's letters go?” asked Applebloom.
“I'm sure that they go to somepony extremely important to him.” replied Flam. “But not even the most important of ponies could get an audience with Celestia in any less an hour, and even if she offers a few guardsponies to join in the search, it wouldn't be enough. Flim is very good at hiding.”
All three of the Cutie Mark Crusaders picked that moment to fall over, laughing.
At this point, there was a thumping sound from the wall of their cell.
“Hello?” called a voice. “Somepony there?”
* * *
Princess Celestia and Rainbow Dash appeared in the Ponyville library in a flash of white.
“Princess Celestiaaaaaaaa!” cried Twilight, burying her face in her teacher's shoulder and staining Celestia's coat with tears.
“Twilight.” said Celestia, wrapping one wing around her faithful student. She glanced up, and saw that the other Element-Bearers were already there. “Twilight, Spike lives.”
This... had not been what Twilight had been expecting. “What?” she asked.
Celestia held up a slightly torn blanket. “This arrived via dragonfire,” she said, “not two minutes ago. Via Spike's dragonfire.”
“So... he's alive?” asked Rarity.
“He was,” said Celestia, “two minutes ago.”
“So we can have a you're-not-dead-after-all PARTY?” asked Pinkie.
Celestia rolled out the blanket on the floor of the library. “I don't know where he is, but from the looks of this, he is in some trouble. I would like all of you to look over this blanket and tell me what, if anything, you can tell from it. Wherever Spike is, he needs our help, and we need to find him.”
“Horribly low thread count.” said Rarity. “Poor quality – but for that, a strangely... regular weave. Low-quality materials made with high-quality methods. And...”
She took a closer look.
“I've never seen fabric like this before.” she said. “I thought I knew every type of fabric in Equestria... this must be something new. I can't even recognise the threads...”
“Flim.” said Applejack, pointing at the upper name. “Tha's the name o' one o' a pair o' unicorn salesponies tha' once tried ta take over mah farm...”
“Rainbow Dash recognised that name as well.” said Celestia. “The royal guard are out looking for them as we speak.”
* * *
Alright, Shining Armour, you can do this. The stallion took a deep breath, and looked deep into the eyes of the mare next to him. She was perfect, in every way, and he knew it; if it hadn't been for the headaches he kept getting lately, he'd have asked her this question well before. As it was, he'd finally taken a day of leave from his guardsduties, and taken her to the finest restaurant in Canterlot...
He knelt down next to her, and asked, “Princess Mi Amore Cadenza,” he said, “will you marr-”
“Captain Shining Armour!” interrupted Lieutenant Bright Hooves, grabbing him by the shoulder. “Emergency. All guards' leave has been cancelled, by the order of Celestia herself.”
“And... what emergency, exactly, is this?” asked the pretty pink alicorn princess, nervously.
“Ponies wanted for questioning, ma'am.” said Bright Hooves. “Three of them. One Flim, one Flam, one Pog. Little but the names to go off, unfortunately. Apparently two of them are unicorn salesponies.”
“Really?” asked the mare. She closed her eyes for a moment, and listened to her swarm. She didn't care one way or another about the missing persons, but she did care – a lot – about Shining Armour asking her a certain question. And so if she could just clear some minor obstacle out of the way first...
'...world famous Flim Flam brothers!' sang out the pair of unicorn stallions; the viewpoint was that of a changeling in the crowd, chanting 'Cider! Cider!' along with the rest.
Now Chrysalis had a pair of faces to go with the names. She sent the faces out into the mind of the Swarm, with one instruction... locate.
In mere seconds, the reports came back... the most recent one being only half an hour old. Flim and Flam, at a small stall in the Canterlot open market, selling goods with a song and a dance. Another instruction - Find. Track.
And again, a name went out to the Swarm – 'Pog'.
Response – only singular, which was surprising – 'captor'.
Follow-up query: 'location'
Response – 'unknown'.
That was mildly worrying.
The pretty pink alicorn princess opened her eyes again. “Wouldn't the Canterlot open market be the best place to look for salesponies?” she asked, carefully.
Bright Hooves and Shining Armour glanced at each other. “Yes, ma'am, I guess it would.” said Bright Hooves.
“Oh, excellent.” she said, with a predatory grin. “I'm going to look there, then.”
Shining Armour and Bright Hooves rushed towards her. “No, wait -” said Shining.
“You can't -” tried Bright.
She simply ignored them, hurrying to the door and concentrating on the Swarm. Honestly, being this polite and helpful was getting on her nerves, she could hardly wait to be able to change her behaviour and blame it on pre-wedding jitters...
...target located. Heading for east balloon port. Nervous, hurrying. Trying to hide.
The mare flinched slightly. That would take an obvious detour to reach from here; the best way to hear and accept Shining's proposal would be... yes...
She sent another command to the Swarm. Herd him. To... the nearest Royal Guard. Don't attract too much attention, he tastes nervous enough to flee from a shout. Try 'Flim', or 'Flam'. When the Royal Guard gets him, make sure they know who he is, then let them take him.
With any luck, Shining will regain the rest of his leave, and we can put our schedule back in order.
* * *
It took only three minutes for Flim to ran right into Vigilant Watch, a young unicorn guard. Vigilant would have let the hurried unicorn go without a second glance, but fortunately, a tan earth pony called the unicorn 'Flim' a mere few seconds later.
* * *
“What about 'Pog'?” asked Celestia. “Does that word mean anything to any of you?”
“No.” said Applejack.
“Nope.” added Rainbow Dash.
“Nope-arooni.” said Pinkie.
Rarity and Twilight contented themselves with merely shaking their heads.
“Then,” said Celestia, “I can only pray that it means something to Flim. Anything else?”
“Um...” squeaked Fluttershy. “I mean... why would Spike send a message on a blanket to begin with?”
The ponies all considered this for a short while.
“'Cause he couldn't find any paper?” asked Pinkie.
Twilight nodded. “Yes...” she said. “Yes, that might be it...”
“Well, um,” said Fluttershy. “Princess Celestia... um... no, it's silly. Never mind. I'm sure you thought of it already.”
“I'm not, dear.” said Rarity. “What were you going to say?”
“Well...” Fluttershy ducked behind her mane closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and continued. “...you can send letters to Spike, right? Can you send him blank paper?”
There was a moment of silence. Then Celestia looked around the room. “Blank paper.” she said.
“Here.” Twilight's magic aura grabbed one of her desk drawers, and pulled it out – fast enough to smash into the wall opposite, scattering blank paper throughout the room. Celestia pointed her horn at one sheet; it wrapped itself up in a ribbon, and promptly vanished.
“Could y'send him a quill an' ink?” asked Applejack.
Celestia shook her head. “Liquids can't be transported by dragonflame.” she explained. “They dry out. And a quill could get caught in Spike's throat, choking him. He can scratch out a message with his claws if necessary.”
(1) Named after Jack Hammer, the pony who had first officially described it in scientific literature. The several hundred dragons who had used the technique before, in some cases thousands of times before, were somewhat upset when they found out.