//------------------------------// // Chapter 1: Electric Boogaloo // Story: King Sombra's Robotic Retaliation [CANCELLED] // by Darrtaa //------------------------------// Disclaimer: I don't own My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic or any of the characters, nor do I own Team Fortress 2 or any of its characters. I do, however, own Copper Head. Lyra was worried, worried a lot, worried more than she usually was on her favorite picnic spot. She nudged the woven basket forward a bit, sighing as she looked over at the fire for the tea she had magically lit. Lyra was a pony, a unicorn you see, she was happy, polite, and green as can be. The only part of her that was different colors was her Cutie Mark that set her apart from the others; a lyre of gold adorned either of her flanks that advertised her talent, which she owed much thanks. Her yellow eyes swiveled down at her clock as time past, first it had gone slowly but now it was too fast. "It's not like him to be this late, I hope he hasn't met with some terrible fate." The young mare huffed as she lied down on her towel, the waiting and wondering started to make her scowl. She looked out at the world she found herself in and felt the warm grass tickling her chin. Pyroland was good at that, being warm and bright, and everyone got long with hardly any fights. The sun was slowly setting in the west and Lyra had yet to see her special guest. She looked left and then all the way to the right, but nothing that resembled her friend met her sight. Suddenly her ears perked up from a sound, followed quickly by her head as she looked all around. Sure enough, from over the rise, came a bipedal creature of considerable size. "Pyro! I've been waiting here since two! I had though- dear Celestia, what happened to you!?" The way Pyro carried himself was slumped over and pained, and the Pyroland in his wake looked dead and drained. He was laughing weakly (it was more like wheezing) as he walked towards her, stumbling as his joints started seizing. Confetti and balloons seemed to spurt from the openings in his bright red suit, and he fell with a thud as his foot caught a root. Lyra was at his side with a quick trot, as Pyro mumbled from behind his black mask: "It really hurts to get shot…" -x-x-X-x-x- "Yes, I'll have those troop assignments from my brother finalized before I talk to Princess Luna later this evening about a new star cluster she had in mind. Oh, and Princess Celestia needs to get together with Princess Cadance sometime before next week, now, I have some important business to attend to." "As you say, Princess Twilight," the gold-clad unicorn said with a quick salute before turning away down the hall as the door closed behind him magically. Twilight stopped for a moment as she let the word "Princess" hang in the now silent room, she still couldn't believe that she was ACTUALLY an Alicorn now! Although it had been a few months since her coronation she was still having a hard time letting that fact sink in. She put a hoof to her chest and then pointed it straight ahead as she exhaled, she needed to focus on her next task; reading all of the new books she now had access to. "It is something that needs to get done, and I'm sure I can learn all sorts of wonderful things from these great books." Twilight's lavender horn lit up with a similar-colored aura as the mountain of pre-Canterlot books before her rose into the air and began to open their dusty bindings. Twilight's deep purple eyes lit up as she sat down on her rump, her star cluster Cutie Mark on either flank tinkling. The hair on her dark sapphire tail and mane with purple and pink streaks started billowing slightly as the young goddess flipped through multiple books at once with lightning speed. During the whirlwind of paper and the like, Twilight's gaze found its way over to a small, framed picture that she had on her nightstand. Hurricane Paperback died down as she walked over to the frozen moment in time; it was a picture of her and her five best friends she had left back in Ponyville. Twilight smiled, remembering all of the fun adventures they had together as she thought about how they all might be doing. Well, she would be able to ask them that and more when she saw them next week, but for now, the youngest princess needed to perform her Royal Duties appointed to her as the paper and book tornado resumed. "Ah-ha! This one looks interesting; 'How to Properly Construct a List of Royal Duties'." Twilight calmed the paper storm as she laid down on her stomach, since her sides and back were off limits now that she had a pair of unruly wings that still refused to obey their master, and cracked open the centuries old book with a puff of dust. Princess Twilight wrapped her sparkling crown and Element of Harmony off of her egghead and placed it up on one of the shelves before turning back to her hardcover friend. Recently, Princess Celestia was having a hard time remembering something she had scribbled down some couple hundred years ago that she wanted to show Luna, so she ordered the extraction of all books, parchment, scrolls, and tomes from the Everfree Castle's vault and for them to be placed in Twilight's personal library for sorting (Twilight's idea). Since Twilight didn't have dominion over any celestial bodies yet, and Cadance was busy running an empire with Twilight's brother, Shining Armor, Twilight was the best and only willing candidate for such a task. Hours past, as the "Finished" pile of books grew larger, only a few scrolls and small journals remained…along with a strange chest. The lavender princess shuffled forwarded as she inspected the mysterious chest; it looked important, seeing as how it was dyed blue wood and brilliantly crafted metal making up its frame. Upon turning it around to where the lock was located, Twilight Sparkle suddenly realized who's this was, the crescent moon over a dark patch of space was identical to the Cutie Mark that Princess Luna was famous for (besides the whole "Evil Moon Goddess" thing). The "Castles and Casters" player in the young deity got the better of her for a moment. 'This could be a mimic that has been hiding in the old castle and the guards just didn't notice. I better approach this carefully.' Twilight quickly formed one of her book forts and prepared to combat the potentially diabolical chest… "What in Celestia's name am I doing?" Embarrassed yet thankful that nopony saw that, the blushing Element of Magic dispersed her fortress of parchment as fast as it had been constructed before turning her sights, and magic, on the lock before her. 'Should I being doing this? It looks like Luna made sure nopony would be able to access whatever's in here…well, she and Celestia DID look over everything before it was given to me…' With her brilliant mind made up, Twilight finished off the mystical tumblers as the chest swung open and a black veil shot out and wrapped around her head. "MIMIC! Get it off get it off get it off!" Twilight wrestled and flailed but only managed to get more tangled up in its clutches! She struggled more as the creature's cloth-like skin brushed against her face and the smell of soot reached her snout. She managed to relax and pull the beast off of her, only to find something that resembled the cloak Rarity made when she thought that she might have to leave Ponyville forever. "Oh! It was just a coat, thank goodness I-" *BAM* "GET AWAY FROM THE PRINCESS, CRIMINAL SCUM!" "EEEK! Wedge, you scarred me!" "I- huh? You screamed, what happen?" the increasingly confused guard asked slowly as his blue eyes scanned the entirety of the room for anything potentially threatening to his shocked princess. Convinced that everything was in order, and that he seriously needed to cut back on the caffeine during these boring graveyard shifts, Wedge bowed apologetically and backed quietly out of the room once again closing the door behind him. Twilight let out a sigh of relief as she slowly slid down on her hunches. 'I forgot I can't be as loud as I could at the library without a guard thinking I'm being attacked,' she though as she unconsciously placed a hoof over her mouth. With her wits returning to her, Twilight decided to brave the chest once more, this time opening the lid much more slowly than before. The inside of the dark blue container was untouched by dust and everything inside seemed as pristine as the day it was sealed; a small mirror, a few notebooks, a small wind-up toy rat…and something glowing? Twilight's curiosity overrode the little nerdy voice in her head telling her that she hadn't performed an arcane check yet as she reached in and produced a shining, golden key. The Element of Magic wrapped the tool in her lavender aura and turned it over and over while scratching the soft fur on her chin. "What is this for I wonder? Its far too big to fit the lock, maybe it- hmm?" Twilight felt a tug on the key, only to find a long, black thread that had gotten wrapped around the teeth that trailed back to the sneak-attack jacket where a piece of folded parchment had fallen from one of the deep pockets. Princess Twilight sat herself down next to the deceptively dormant cloak and opened the folded paper to find…a bunch of doodles with some numbers scribbled beside them? Before she could further investigate what appeared to be drawings that could be found on Cheerilee's chalkboard, Twilight was graced by the presence of her mentor and sun goddess: Princess Celestia. "Good evening, Twilight," the tall, white Alicorn said with a smile. Twilight curtsied as the age-old deity elegantly trotted in, her golden horseshoes clinking ever so slightly as both they, and her gold neck piece, twinkled. Her multicolored, ethereal mane billowed around her in the solar wind coming from her sun, which was also her Cutie Mark. "My, I see somepony was busy. Did you manage to find what I asked?" "I think so, but, I wanted to ask about this chest I found." Celestia's ears perked as her magenta eyes followed her student's hoof over towards the open chest. "I haven't seen that chest in what feels like an eternity. If I remember correctly, this is the 'secret chest' Luna had back when my father was still on the throne…" The graceful wings upon her back ruffled slightly as she drifted fondly away into her vast memory. Twilight's mouth slowly opened as did her eyes. "A King Starforge-era chest? Th-This must be THOUSANDS of years of years old! I'm so sorry I opened it! I should have asked you or Luna- I mean Princess Luna!" "Twilight, it's okay! That was just one of many that we had back when Luna and I were fillies, that one was Luna's favorite so she painted it to separate it from the others." Twilight's breathing returned to normal at the reassuring words of her longtime teacher. 'Honestly, she's almost as bad as those historical society ponies I have breaking down my door every time they find one of my old brushes…' Celestia shook her head ever so slightly as her familiar smile graced her features. "Thank you for finding that old journal for me, Twilight. Now, it's getting rather late and we're going to busy these next few weeks with the Crystal Fair just around the corner." Twilight nodded with a smile as the solar deity turned, journal in hoof, and headed back down the hall towards her own magnificent quarters. Twilight sleepily trotted over to her own bed with a yawn when she suddenly realized something; just what exactly was Celestia looking for in that book? Unfortunately, she was too tired to pursue the thought for much longer as the seductive call of her bed became irresistible and the sleepy mare dozed off for the rest of the night in peace…little did she known this would be the last peaceful night's rest she would have for a long time. -x-x-X-x-x- " TELEPORTER COMPLETION AT SIXTY FOUR PERCENT. TELEPORTER IS EIGHTEEN WEEKS BEHIND SCHEDULE. DANG-NABBIT DANGIT!" The Robo-Engie was not happy about the rate of progress it had been making on its pet project, well, it couldn't actually FEEL whether or not it was actually happy about the progress, but all of the data that it had been gathering about human emotions (in order to manipulate them) dictated that it should be furious. Even with extremely limited resources and having been the first robot in all of Gray's robot army to even attempt a lvl. 4 Teleporter, progress hadn't been ideal. Just as it had been doing hour after hour, day after day, it calibrated the servos in its arm and brought down its wrench on the pinpoint location on the blue, metal casing as the sharp "clang" reverberated throughout the damp cave the task-obsessed robot had holed up in ever since its teleporter mishap some odd months ago. Suddenly, the metallic texan paused as a binary line of code labeled "thought.exe" crossed through its processor, something that it hadn't thought possible: what of it hit the teleporter harder? It was just crazy enough to cause irreversible damage and possibly work. Maybe. It unnecessarily tightened its already iron grip on the battered wrench and, adding a marginal amount of force, brought the all-purpose tool down on the cross-shaped tele-pad with a loud "CLANG!" " EXPERIMENT TO INCREASE PRODUCTIVITY HAS FAILED. COMMENCING SELF-DESTRUCT IN THREE…TWO…" Just then, before the explosive egg timer reached zero, the previously statuesque lvl. 4 Teleporter began to jerk and sputter with blue sparks of energy as a blue disk of light formed above it and expanded well beyond that of any previous incarnation before stabilizing at a radius that could easily encompass one of the great Carrier Tanks. COUNTDOWN ABORTED. TASK COMPLETED. REQUESTING NEW ORDERS FROM GRAY GRAVEL CO. HELLO, HELLO. THIS IS ENGINEER NUMBER FORTY TWO REQUESTING ASSISTANCE FROM NEAREST ROBOT COMMANDER. HELLO." The Engie-Bot waited with what could possibly be considered "hope" for several minutes before a weak signal finally crackled over its radio. "HELLO? THIS IS SERGEANT CRITS RECEIVING, STATE YOUR BUSINESS OR GET BACK TO WORK." " THIS IS ENGINEER BOT NUMBER FORTY TWO. LVL. 4 TELEPORTER HAS BEEN COMPLETED. REQUESTING FURTHER ORDERS." "LISTEN, NUMB-BOLTS, THIS CHANNEL IS FOR CRITICAL INFORMATION EXCHANGE ONLY, NOT FOR FAILED PROJECTS THAT WE GAVE UP OVER A YEAR FOR MORE HAT SPACE. BESIDES, THE ENGINEER THAT WAS WORKING ON THAT DESIGN WENT MISSING AND…IGNORE WHAT I JUST SAID, SENDING TEST SCOUTS TO YOUR LOCATION NOW." -x-x-X-x-x- Lyra patched Pyro up right even though he assured her that he was alright. The green mare slumped against a candy-colored tree, looking over at Pyro and uttering, "What would you do without me?" The firebug chuckled as he clutched his hurt arm. "I would certainly be suffering from more grievous harm. But Lyra I'm worried when you're done fixing me your magic is gone, and I fear that it may not return before too long. Let the Medic be the one to heal my body, he does good work, no matter how shotty." Ms. Heartstrings was a little dismayed at the uncharacteristic coldness her friend had suddenly displayed. She knew that her magical healing wasn't the best but she never once thought she'd be regarded as a pest! Lyra crossed her forelegs with a pout as she flicked her tail and scrunched up her snout. "I just think SOMEPONY should have more self-preservation, 'don't get shot' shouldn't be an astounding revelation." The red-clad arsonist looked down at the mare as a few happy kitties flew through the air; Pyro knew that he was reckless and brash, but he needed to be to rack in the big cash. "Lyra," Pyro said with a start, "I have to help my team and do my part. When I got fired then rehired to fight against bots, I was one of the few who could stop their evil hat-selling plots. Protecting Mann Co. is what I must do…but it makes it all worth while when I get to come back to see you." "Aww, you're so sweet, but I feel kinda bad, won't you being here make your other friends jealous or mad?" Lyra said as she turned to look around the colorful tree to see her human friend warming some tea. "Friends? HAH! Lyra, surely you jest, those other guns for hire are just like the rest: they fear what they don't understand, and for all they know my blood runs white like the sand. I once tried talking to them without my rebreather, but Scout saw me first and thought I was a hell-forged reaver. You're my only real friend and don't ever forget it, because if anyone ever tries to hurt you, I'll make them regret it." The green unicorn's mind was suddenly filled with thoughts of fire and flame as the image of the Infernal Imp ran rampant through her brain. She shuddered a little, somewhat scared, but her friend was in control and she was prepared. Pyro had taught her how to protect those around her in the name of truth and might should she ever be thrown into an unavoidable fight. The arsonist was suddenly up like a shot. "I need to return, I'll be fired if I'm not!" He gathered his gear quick as a flash and sprinted back down the hill with a dash. Lyra jumped up. "Wait, come back! Take me with you, I can pick up the slack!" The enthusiastic pony broke into a sprint, her loaded up saddlebags clinking side to side as she went. She caught up to Pyro faster than expected…only to see that she was about to be rejected. "I can't let you do that," he said with his gloved hand in the air, "the place I'm going is far too dangerous for a mare. I know you think you could fit in with my ranks, but you wouldn't be any use against bots, let alone tanks." Seeing how hurt and angry Lyra had become, he got down to her level and booped her head with his thumb. "I'm sure I seem as mean as the Horsemann with out a head, but my situation's different since I don't stay dead. I would love nothing more than to have you on my team, but alas it is only a dream." Lyra brushed away a tear, not wanting to look at Pyro as she plopped down on her rear. She knew that she might just get in the way, but the mare didn't want him leaving if she had to stay. The mint green Equestrian looked up with sorrow. "Do you think you could visit tomorrow?" Pyro sighed, "I can certainly try, but only if you promise that you won't cry. Just remember that I can always hear when you speak or sing, so long as you wear… -x-x-X-x-x- "…zat diamond ring is going to look so beautiful on ze hand of my petite fleur if you don't GET UP YOU SIMPLETON!" The leather glove that contained the angry Frenchman's hand did little to buffer the impact of his palm slamming into the side of Pyro's mask. "Huddah!? Mhmmmhm!" Pyro muffled angrily as he stood, coming mask to balaclava with the annoyed French alarm clock as he tapped his spats against the dusty, worn down wooden floor. "Don't give me zat tone, you mute freak. What are you doing just laying around in ze middle of ze room? We have robots to destroy!" the Spy barked as he spun on his heels and rushed to the door. Pyro, still rubbing his cheek, peered out at the agent of espionage opening the door as the thunderous roar of the battle raging outside rapidly grew louder, the metal gate opening just enough for the now cloaked Spy to dash through before sealing itself again. Pyro groaned as he stood, stretching out all of his aches after laying on the dusty floor for the time that he did certainly took its toll, especially since he had been resting on his propane tank again. After deciding not to entertain the idea of simply filling an air mattress with propane any longer than he already had, the crimson fire-starter moseyed over to the counter of the Upgrade Station and was greeted with a menu of potential enhancements for both he and his array of weaponry. The Upgrade Station, through means which Pyro never really cared to inquire about, was able to boost any weapon beyond its normal limits and grant new abilities to some. The Station was also able to increase physical performance of the class wielding said weapons and even bring them back from death's tacky old door for the right price. While the machines worked their dark, science-y magic on Pyro's trusty flamethrower, the sharp pain in his side reminded him that the canteen that had dug into his hip while he was down needed to be filled. The pyromancer unceremoniously tossed the militarist canteen over the counter and purchased the "Refill Ammo" charge. Pyro grumbled, only having enough partially burnt money to buy one of the three charges, and that was one of the cheaper charges too. The bipedal salamander's day got a little brighter as his flamethrower was returned to him, and with its burn duration and max ammo upgraded, he was going to make everyone else's day just as violently bright. However, upon exiting onto the fake Mann Co. facility Soldier had managed to build out in the middle of nowhere (which was impressive since it was actually further out in the middle of nowhere than they usually found themselves) the blazing sun combined with the various muzzle flashes was already doing a fine job of causing temporary blindness. "OI!" came a voice as Pyro took his first few steps onto the dusty battlefield. "What're ya doing all the way back here? You should be up in front with- CRIKEY!" Sniper suddenly ducked as a bullet bored into the wooden beam just above his head. The Australian marksman was back up in a second with his trusty sniper rifle aimed down range where the bullet had come from. "Steady, steady…*BANG* Take THAT, ya bloody fruit shop owners!" Sniper, a slender bushman from the most hazardous parts of the Outback, brushed a few beads of sweat from under his brown Aussie hat and adjusted his glasses. He slipped a few more .308 rounds from his vest and loaded them into his trusty sniper rifle. Pyro had mixed feelings about Sniper; on one hand, he was by far the best for taking down other Snipers and just about anything else at long-range, but on the other, he was next to useless in close quarters and made himself even more vulnerable by giving himself a wicked case of tunnel vision whenever he looked down his scope…and made him a sitting duck for those accursed Spies. The flame-retardant mute got the all-clear from the Sniper and rushed ahead across the rickety bridge towards the central building where the sounds of combat were most prominent. As Pyro rounded the corner, he suddenly had to whip back around to avoid a hailstorm of shrapnel that pelted the wooden shack. "IS THAT ALL YOU'VE GOT, YOU SORRY EXCUSES FOR TRASHCANS!?" Pyro rolled his eyes under his tinted goggles as the reason for all of the uproar emerged from the fog of hat-based war; Soldier. Soldier, or "Jane Doe" as he referred to himself, brushed off bits of scrap and dust from his bright-red jacket as he cocked the spent shell from his shotgun. He tilted his battered army helmet up from over his eyes as a sneer covered his grizzled features. "Pyro! Just what in the name of Bablo Biggins are you doing standing still like congress instead of out there fighting like a bureaucratic raccoon!?" "Huddah hmrmm mhmm mphm, huddah huddah huddah (mhmm mphmm) mmmhm mm mmphm," Pyro explained. "I see! Well, back to the front!" Pyro instinctively took a large step back as the All-American lunatic flipped his primary rocket launcher over his right shoulder before performing the brilliant stunt of hopping slightly and then firing a rocket at his own feet. The red rocketeer soared like a potato filled with helium before plummeting deep into the fray with bullets and explosives flying up to meet him, leaving Pyro behind to contemplate why on earth he ever thought that copying that tactic with his Detonator was a good- *CLANG* "HEY, HOW WOULD YOU LIKE TO BUY A HAT? ALSO, PREPARE TA' DIE." Pyro felt the cold, hard, metal make a solid hit against his temple as he tumbled through the air and crashed into the ground. The pyromancer shook his head in an attempt to halt the spinning as he shakily got to his feet to face his assailant/sales representative. The Scout-Bot's movements in relation to the genuine article was uncanny, as was its appearance. It sported the same trappings as the Boston baserunner only in cold metal and cogs as opposed to cotton and skin. The only things that were probably the most accurate were the dog tags, the bat with a Pyro-sized dent in it, and the thermal-nuclear bomb strapped to its back. "Muh-mo..." -x-x-X-x-x- Princess Luna loved clear nights. Sure, sometimes it was necessary for storm clouds to block out the sky, but even so, why would anypony want to hide such a beautiful sight? Luna looked endlessly up at the various star clusters and constellations that she and her father had formed aeons ago. Luna and her father had always been close, and as she looked on, she wondered just where in the universe her parents had gone and what they might be doing. She sighed, her star-studded mane and tail billowing around her. The lights all throughout the surrounding countryside dimmed as the moon rose higher in the night sky. The dark blue alicorn levitated her mug and took a sip of her calming herbal tea before stretching out and hearing her deceptively ancient joints pop. "Ohhh…I don't care WHAT anypony else says, not wearing clothes is far superior to any form of garment." "I whole-heartedly agree, but the maids would stage a coup if we didn't wear our jewelry." "EEP!" The lunar goddess jumped as she quickly wrapped her mug in a deep blue aura to keep it from spilling. "Celly! I didn't hear you come out. Why are you still up? Shouldn't you be resting for your 'I'm-going-to-be-so-busy-I-might-turn-into-Solar-Flare-just-to-get-out-of-it' week?" The sun deity's magenta irises did a full lap inside her eyes before clamping shut as a golden horseshoe pressed against her forehead in a feeble attempt to relieve stress. "Moving on," Celestia mumbled loudly. "Do you remember how I sent for all of our old journals from the Everfree Fortress?" Thoughts of having to grant approval for more books than she ever had since well before her little "time out" on her own moon came flooding back into her mind. "Yes, I remember that vividly. I still don't fully comprehend why you made the guards, and myself, suffer through that." "Trust me, Lulu, there was a reason; this little notebook right here." With that, the small notebook Twilight had managed to uncover floated over in front of the night princess and flopped open to a certain page. Luna's cyan eyes widened as she saw the illustration and her mouth fell agape. "You see, Luna, I think HE is the original cause for all of those magical disturbances we've been detecting as of late." -x-x-X-x-x- " LVL. 4 TELEPORTER IS OPERATING AT NOMINAL LEVELS. YOUR HAULS APPEAR UNDAMAGED BY THE PROCESS. YOUR INTERNAL CIRCUITS APPEAR TO BE ALTERED, ARE YOU CORRUPTED MODELS?" "EEEW! I DON'T WANT YOUR SCANNERS ANYWHERE NEAR ME! ONLY REASON WE'RE IN THIS DANK CAVE IS 'CAUSE THE SERGEANT WAS ON THE WARPATH AND FORCED US INTO SOME BROKEN-ASS TELEPORTER." "YEAH, AND WHILE WE'RE STUCK HERE, ALL THE OTHER SCOUT BOTS ARE GONNA SNATCH UP WHAT'S LEFT OF THE FEMME BOTS! THE REALLY HOT ONES GOT DISCONTINUED YA' KNOW! " The Engie-Bot's processors were having a hard time trying to keep up with what its dual optical sensors were relaying to them: the Sergeant had sent these two Scout-Bots with abnormal programming to test the new teleporter? It scanned the two again, attempting to find the source of their malfunction when Engie-Bot discovered multiple new software signals streaming from the drivers stored under their metal ball caps. " YOUR PROGRAMMING IS NON-STANDARD AND IS AFFECTING YOUR PEAK EFFICIENCY. PREPARE TO BE DISMANTLED." "WHADDA MEAN BY THAT!? WAIT A MINUTE, WHY ARE YA' STILL BEEPIN' WHEN YOU- OHHH. I THINK I KNOW WHAT HAPPENED…" "YOU DON'T THINK…THIS CLUNKER DIDN'T GET THE 2.0 UPGRADE, DID IT?" The two robotic recon runners stared at each other while the bionic builder attempted to reduce them to scrap with its wrench, but was halted by an outstretched, hydraulic hand clasping its goggles. "HUH, I GUESS THAT EXPLAINS WHY THE SERGEANT MADE ME LUG THIS THING ALONG." The Scout-Bot that wasn't busy holding back the aged Engie-Bot reached into its steel pack and produced a mining helmet with a large bulb on the front. In one swift motion, the bolted ball-player knocked the titanium Texan's hat off its cold head before slamming down the new one. " W-WHAT? WHAT'D Y'ALL DO TA' ME?" Robo-Engie 2.0 said as it staggered about the dark cave. "WE ENHANCED YOU. MADE YOU BETTER," said the first Scout-Bot as it bolted its bag onto its back. "YEAH, WE CAN'T HAVE YOU MEETING THE SERGEANT LIKE THAT…AND HE SHOULD BE HERE ANY MINUTE."