//------------------------------// // 17. Complex/Situation // Story: Stallions of Harmony - Longest Night // by Jetto //------------------------------// Summer Solstice, more often known as the longest day in the year, in which sun was not supposed to come down until later in the evening. The key word being 'supposed to'. Equestria had families, circles of friends and other larger gatherings of ponies celebrating, hours before the official ceremony, eagerly awaiting. Alarm clocks were set just few minutes earlier, giving enough time to find a good vantage point and have a toast in the beautiful sunrise. Many traditions were tied to this. The most obvious one was of course the first kiss in the sunrise, which was supposed to guarantee stability of a relationship. Families shared a single loaf of bread, hoping to never be in danger of starvation. Farmers would take a single batch of the best produce from that day and burn it in a campfire, which was supposed to convince fire spirits that they weren’t forgotten and had no reason to burn anything to remind anypony of their existence anymore, a custom which survived ever since before unification of three tribes. None of these happened today. In fact, today did not happen like they had anticipated. At first, the citizens of Canterlot were mildly curious as to why there was a delay with the sun. Then, the jokes about Princess becoming a bit lazy started. Theories of an epic prank from Princess, for no good reason other then laughs. It was just a matter of time before the entire city was struck by a mass hysteria and chaos worthy of Discord reigned through the city, with barely anypony qualified to contain the panic. Eventually, a police state was announced. Nopony was allowed to leave their homes or shelters until the situation was either fixed or a decision was made. A decision made by nobles without the supervision of Princess Celestia or Captain of the Royal Guards. To say the situation was dire would be a great understatement. The streets of Canterlot were empty, save for paroling guards searching for any trespassing ponies. Such as the ones that sneaked past two pegasi guards, before they continued their gallop further down the city gates, avoiding any light sources and stopping by every dark corner, slowly but surely approaching the train station. Upon making sure it was empty, three cloaked figures moved towards the front car of the train and after a simple spell unlocked the door and opened it with a glowing purple aura. Once inside, however... "Ok, so we're here... now what?" asked one voice, making the second one scratch her head while looking at the alien machinery. "Well, we gotta make it move. Somehow." she looked around the car and perked when she noticed a desired object "AHA! Just what we needed!" she exclaimed happily as she grabbed the object with her magic. The other two looked at each other, then back at their comrade as she opened the recently found book and started reading it, illuminating it with purple glow from her horn. "Seriously? You're gonna read a book? Now?" "Why not?" asked the third one "It's not like we have any better ideas. Besides, nopony is going to come here anyway anytime soo-" she stopped when a voice outside interrupted her. "Is anypony there?" asked a guard pony standing just outside the train "Leave the vehicle and identify yourself!" Instantly, all three figures ducked for cover, glowing horn fizzling out. A weak smile appeared on the third cloaked pony as her companions shot deadly glares her way. “You said the coast was clear!” whispered one of them. “It was! This guy is good. Like a ninja!” "There is no such thing as a ninja!" "That's what THEY want you to believe!" They took a peek outside. The train station was weakly lit, but they could still see a fairly tall, red coated unicorn stallion in a standard issue golden guard armor. “Maybe if we're quiet he'll think it's nothing and walk away?” asked the first one. The guard disappointed them. “I know you're in there, I can see you inside. Answer now!” The third one moved a bit closer the windows. “Meow! Meow!” “You're not fooling me!” answered the irritated guard. Two ponies inside the car silently facehooved, while third one shrugged “Hey, it was worth a shot!” The second one finally sighed and massaged her head. She stood up and placed her hoof on the door handle. “Fine, let me take care of this.” despite her companions silent pleas, they couldn't stop her from leaving the car and approaching the guard, but only after she made sure that the hood was obscuring her entire face. She had to curse her beautiful horn for sticking out of it no matter how much she tried. Once outside and facing the guard, she coughed and concentrated on making the best first impression possible. “Oi, meh wants no problems, see,” Celestia only knew which accent it was. Actually, probably not even Celestia knew. “Tell me she's not...” “She is!” “...meh jus' a poor gypsy bahd, lost in a big city, wit no home, no bits, only rags und mah sad memories of home long lost. Please, good officer, be kind to poor little pony, meh means no harm!” Her two companions back in the car barely resisted the urge to slam their heads into the floor, only resorting to groaning silently and delicately facehoofing. If the situation wasn't so dire they might have burst into laughter as well. The guard was, however, not finding any of this funny and just rolled his eyes with annoyance. “You think he bought it?” “I wouldn't.” “But they're just guards, right? That usually works in books.” “Adventure novels take a lot of liberties.” “Yeah, right,” the guard snorted “I might have been fooled if not for the fact that you have a brand new saddlebags with University logo on it.” The “gypsy” raised her eyebrows and looked around to catch a glimpse of her saddlebags. After so many years of wearing them to every class, she completely overlooked the fact that they were standard issue ones given and exclusive to every single student. A shame, they were the biggest and most comfortable ones they had. “Also, for a homeless poor gypsy you smell way too much like cheap perfumes.” “THEY'RE NOT CHEAP!” she suddenly stepped forward to face him, not even noticing that the hood just fell of her head, revealing a light amber face with long, red and orange hair, very much reminiscent of sunset they longed for since yesterday “I'll have you know they're from the most renowned perfumer found in Canterlot and I pay very generous price for my very own custo-...” she froze. The guard smiled smugly and waited for her to continue. She had little more to add “... buck!” “Not to mention that terrible attempt at an accent.” Her eyebrow twitched “Oh no you didn't!” she stepped forward and poked his chest “That's how they talk on the provinces near the southern borders and I wasn't attempting, I'm the real deal!” “Yeah, sure you are,” the guard shoved her hoof away “you and your two friends will have to follow me to the station for further interrogations.” Great. And he knew that she wasn't alone. Just bucking great, the entire plan ruined by a guard who had the audacity to break any stereotypes and actually be competent. That only left her with one last idea. She pointed a hoof behind him and shouted. "LOOK! The sun is rising!" The guard raised an eyebrow, clearly at the end of his patience. "First of, that wasn't funny. Second, the sun rises from the opposite direction." "OH FOR PETE'S SAKE!" The guard didn't even have a moment to react before the mare charged at him and pressed her face towards him, to the point that he got a very good look at her cyan eyes. His only immediate reaction was covering in a deep red blush, as the mare whispered. "Sorry." Their horns collided and one emitted sparks. BZZT! The guard twitched and fell on the ground, parts of his body still trembling from the literal shock. The mare sighed with relief, glad that her early days tricks were still a useful as she remembered them. "SUNSET! What have you done!?" shouted Twilight Sparkle as she ran out of the car and approached her fiery colored friend, no longer bothering with the cloak to disguise herself. Sunset just shrugged. "Relax, I just stunned him a little, he'll be fine." "No, he will not!" she walked to the guard and poked him with her hoof. He only twitched a little more and gargled something incomprehensible "Didn't you hear him? He knows who we are, and when he wakes up they'll send wanted posters all over Equestria!" she walked to Sunset, grabbed her shoulders and looked her deep into her eyes "We're criminals now! CRIMINALS!" "You're panicking, again..." "I knew this was a stupid plan. STUPID PLAN! All I ever wanted was to borrow that train, get to Ponyville and save Princess and my brother, not... WHAT HAVE I BECOME?" "Twilight, seriously..." "Do you think they'll still let me take tests in jail? I mean, I am a top student, right? Ooh, I can already hear them talking already! 'She was such a good girl, how could she become a... CRIMINAL!'" tears started flowing from her eyes and for some reason, her hair was becoming a mess with every second. Sunset Shimmer could only roll her eyes as she slowly raised a hoof. "My parents... they had such hopes for me and this is how I repay them? By forever cursing my family to be known as those filthy CRIMINA--!" SLAP! Twilight stopped her whining to massage her now burning hot left cheek. She looked Sunset into her eyes for a few moments and finally sighed. Her first instinct would normally be lashing out and starting a heated debate over using physical abuse on their own friend, but she did not feel angry. At least not at her. "Thanks. I needed that." she buried her eyes into the ground. Sunset slowly patted her head. "Don't worry, you'll be fine. He only saw my face, so I'll be the only one wanted." Twilight looked at Sunset Shimmer, her eyes widened "B-but..." "No buts!” she shrugged with a fake smile “They already think I'm evil anyway, might as well give them prove them right. I don't care, so long as you two are..." "No." Sunset blinked. "What do you mean 'no'?" "Listen, Missy," Twilight stepped towards Sunset and poked her chest "first of all, this was my stupid plan and I shouldn't drag any of you into this, so no, you are not taking all the blame for it. And two,” another poke “most importantly and mark my words," she took a deep breath. "You are not evil! You never were and you never will be. And don't let anypony tell you otherwise." During all these years of living with Twilight Sparkle, Sunset Shimmer often wondered why they were friends to begin with. All they ever did together was bicker, complain, compete for grades and attention in classes. And Sunset lost most of the time. Yet, here they were, protecting and consoling each other while ruler of their land was gone and darkness filled the sky for almost two days already. As Princess Celestia herself kept telling them, 'friendship is weird'. "Thanks," replied Sunset, as she averted her eyes, trying to hide a few tears that appeared in her eyes. Failing. "I needed that." "What are friends for." answered Twilight Sparkle averting her gaze from her friend to not look at tears on her face. Failing. "Awww, that's so adorable!" they heard the third voice coming from the car, one easily recognizable as their best friend, Moondancer. As to whose best friend she was specifically was still up for debate, as neither wanted to give up on such claim. "So, will they ever kiss?" asked a strange, male voice nearby. "Sadly, no." Twilight and Sunset gasped and quickly turned towards the car to see their friend standing in front of it, also abandoning her hood and revealing her white coat and red and white mane. But what really bothered all three of them, least of all Moondancer, was a long, sharp blade only about an inch away from her throat, as well as a long hoof of a white coated royal guard that held her hostage. With a smile on his face. "I told you, like a ninja!" "H-how long were you two there?" asked Twilight, as she and Sunset took a battle stance and started charging their horns. "Since 'it was a STUPID PLAN', I think" replied the guard, not really bothered by the two aggressive mares "So, do you surrender, or should we get dirty with it?" Dirty? That was a keyword Moondancer used to some other activities, preferably ones that did not involve slitting her throat open. She felt awful- the mission barely begun and all she contributed to it was overlooking two ninja guards and getting herself captured. But no more, it was her chance to shine, performing an action only she was able to do properly. Or actually, do at all. And get hugs and feels for being the best friend ever. "Ooh, I wouldn't mind getting a bit 'dirty', especially with a stallion like you," she slowly said in the sultriest possible voice, emphasizing the last word with extra special lick of the lips. Her two companions froze as they recognized it as 'mare in heat, will bang anything with pulse' mode she used so much. In public. With witnesses. When near them. Sometimes directed AT them... ...why were they her friends again? "Why don't you hide that big sword of yours and let me take care of your... 'BIG sword'." The guard snorted "Nice try miss, but I'm gay." "OH COME ON!" she threw her hooves into air, almost too dangerously close to the blade, as she pouted away. The guard raised and eyebrow. "If it's any consolation, I would completely fall for it otherwise." "Yeah, sure, that’s what they all say..." After the noble failure of Moondancer, it was up to her two friends to save her from this one. They knew they couldn't try and risk anything reckless. They doubted that this guard would ever try and harm anypony's life even if they tried to force their way out, but there was still plenty of danger if anypony made a single mistake. Not to mention, if the two of them managed to sneak past three mares, who was to say there were only two and not a lot more waiting in the shadows. Moondancer's crazy ninja theory proved right twice already, might as well bet on more. To make matters even worse, they heard a heavy groan behind them, only to notice that the red guard once stunned was once again on his four hooves. "Oh hey Fire Strike, I bought you some time to wake up." asked the armed guard. "Yeah, joy," exclaimed the lazy guard, as he stretched his hooves and glared at Sunset Shimmer "you'll pay for that, wench." Sunset turned toward him and returned the glare and smiled. "I wanna see you try and get me, then." "Oh I will! And your silly tricks won''t work on me again." "Good, because I have plenty more!" "Then come and get some!" Moondancer smiled at the view. She looked to her captor. "Five bits says they'll bang by the end of the month." "Hey, you're talking about my good straight friend... ten bits says they won't." "Deal!" SNAP! "EVERYPONY- SHUT UP!" They all stopped whatever they were doing or talking about once Twilight Sparkle, number one student of Canterlots University for Gifted Unicorns, finally snapped. "Sunset, stop threatening the royal guards, we're in enough trouble as we are right now! I told you that you're not evil, stop acting that way!" "He started it!" she huffed and pointed hoof in direction of Fire Strike. He was the next target. "And you, mister Fire Strike, I'm sorry for my friend and what she had to do, we were desperate and out of options, ok?" "But she zapped me!" protested Fire Strike "That was completely uncalled for!" Sunset protested. "Hey, nopony badmouths my perfumes and home accent!" The armed white unicorn giggled. "And that's why you're forever alone, Fire Strike." said Silver Sword, making Fire Strike blush and turn away, mumbling. "And you, mister... umm..." Twilight stopped and scratched her head "...I didn't catch your name." "It's Silver Sword." "Right, mister Silver Sword, could you please stop aiming a dangerous weapon at my friends throat? We're scared already as we are." "I'm not scared." Moondancer shrugged. "And you, Moondancer..." started Twilight and paused short after. Her hoof touched her chin as she struggled to find something to say "...umm, be more scared! You have a blade at your throat!" "Well, sure I have, but," started Moondancer, scratching her head "it's not like he'll actually hurt me.” There was a short pause, after which Silver Sword glowed his horn (and everypony just now noticed he was a unicorn), which made the blade on his hoof turn to mist and disappear. Once free, Moondancer trotted happily to her two friends. Fire Strike also joined up with his partner. "So," started Silver Sword, as he looked at the three unicorn mares "could you please explain to us why you were hiding in the train during the police hours?" Silence. Twilight Sparkle averted her eyes from the guards and considered answering the question. To the duo guards credit, they did not nag her and instead patiently awaited. She looked right and left to her friends. Both mares were in agreement on this one and nodded, trusting Twilight with her decision. It was, after all, her plan all along. She finally coughed and spoke. "We need to get to Ponyville, as fast as possible."she explained. Silver Sword hummed, but did not reply, letting Twilight continue "I-I don't know what happened and why Princess Celestia is gone, but I know that something happened in Ponyville, where the ceremony was supposed to take place!" "And you wanted to take a train?" asked Silver Sword, to which Twilight nodded. "Yeah, it was a stupid plan, I know, but I couldn't just leave him there!" "Him?" asked Silver Sword, raising an eyebrow and smiling. Twilight opened her mouth but did not say anything and covered herself with blush. Moondancer answered in her stead. "Her big brother is in Ponyville. She's just worried." The guards raised their eyebrows and looked at each other, then back at Twilight, still blushing furiously. And then they started giggling, trying to stifle their laughter by putting hooves to their mouths. "What's so funny?" asked Sunset Shimmer, as she jumped ahead in her friends defense, almost roaring at the two stallions. "Because one," started Silver Sword and smiled from ear to ear "that's just too adorable. Little sister worried about her big brother best friends forever. Priceless!" Twilight walked past Sunset and almost fumed with anger. "What's wrong about caring abo--" she froze midway the sentence "wait, what did you call him?" "And two," continued Fire Strike, completely ignoring the question "whatever attacked Ponyville and Princess Celestia, is in serious trouble once Shining Armor gets to it." Three sets of jaws dropped pretty much to the ground, much to the guards amusement. There was a lot going on on the heads of three mares and explanations were in order. "Yes, we know your brother, miss Twilight Sparkle. It just so happens that all three of us were roommates in the academy.” said Silver Sword, proudly smiling. “What a coincidence...” said Sunset Shimmer, rolling her eyes. Her comment was left largely ignored. “And he wouldn't shut up about his perfect little sister.” added Fire Strike, making Twilight blush even more as she looked at the stone pavement, wondering if she could smash it with her head and bury it inside there for the rest of the conversation. “Seriously, he would NOT. SHUT. UP! Ever.” “Ha, she won't shut up either!” added Moondancer “One time she almost burst out in a song about her BBBFF!” Sunset giggled and joined in “And she talks to his picture when nopony is watching!” “SUNSET!” “Oh. Oops, that was a secret,” she shrugged and smiled wide “sorry, my bad!” The air was filled in laughter, all sides completely forgetting about the previous attempt to steal a train, assault on officers of law and actual death threats. Out of all five gathered ponies only Twilight Sparkle was too busy being red and embarrassed to join in on the fun made on her expense. They were still in great danger, Princess was still gone, yet they took all their attention to making fun of simple sibling love. She huffed and threw her hooves in the air. “Fine, laugh, whatever, I don't care anymore. Make all the fun of a little brother complex I apparently have!” Moondancer stopped laughing, just barely, to wipe a single tear from her eye “We did not use the 'c' word. Yet.” “Also, not 'little'.” added Sunset Shimmer, much to Twilight's further annoyance. Once they finally calmed down, Silver Sword coughed and changed the topic. “Anyway, miss Sparkle. I appreciate the enthusiasm and goodwill (if not necessarily legal methods), but we are already aware of the situation in Ponyville. The Investigations Division was already sent to Ponyville, along with several court magicians, already working on the case. Your assistance is not necessary, even if you're the number one student.” Twilight pouted “I know, but still...” she was interrupted, as Silver Sword walked toward her and put a hoof on her shoulder. He looked her in the eyes and smiled. “He's fine. If I want anypony to be in any danger, it's Shining Armor.” he snorted “Because he's really, really stupid.” Predictably, he was met with confused looks from all three mares, if not angry altogether. Fire Strike explained. “During the training exercises, we had a meme. 'Too stupid to die when killed'. And Shining Armor... he was the dumbest of us all.” “Achoo!” Cold. This was the first feeling Shining Armor had after a sudden sneeze woke him up. His muscles ached, so was his head, so at first he opted on lying on the... ground or wherever he was, for a moment longer. He had no idea where he was, but it was surprisingly comfortable, if a little bit chilly, but that was to be expected from a forest, especially one at night, everlasting one at that. He slowly opened his eyes and looked up. Only white fog, probably the same one they walked in before. His nose itched, but despite his truest intentions, he could not scratch it with his right hoof. Neither he could with his left. His eyes shot open as he just now noticed that his entire body was covered in something. He blinked few more times to get a better sight at it. Vines, anything from his neck down was tied with dark green, tight vines and no matter how much he struggled, they were not getting any looser. Where the heck even am I, he asked nopony in his mind and proceed to scan the area. He was lying on his back, not the most comfortable position for a pony, but under him was a fairly large, soft green surface. It sprawled for a fair distance, about a hundred hooves in length, before ending in a pitfall, going even further into the canyon. To his left and right the view was similar- two walls of solid stone, the surface he was on attached to them, much like a spiderweb, but made of plants. He couldn't twist his head to see what's behind him, but he expected it to end like it did in front. He tried to think of the recent events leading to this. Nightmare Moon, the fight, their last stand, falling down... “DOCTOR!” he screamed, as he twisted his body trying to get out, not making any progress “THUNDERLANE! SOARIN! MACINTOSH! ANYPONY HERE?” “We're here,” answered the voice of Doctor from his back “a bit tied up, but mostly fine.” Everypony confirmed their presence after Doctor, which put Shining Armor at a relative ease. Prince Blueblood was not heard or seen, but his whereabouts were not a mystery. His fate, on the other hoof... “We need to get out of here!” he stretched his muscles to try and get out again, but once again it was futile. “Eyuupp!” he heard Big Macintosh whine behind, as he had the same idea. And from the sound of it, he had just as little luck with breaking out as he did, despite his enormous strength. "Okay, I'm open to ideas. Anypony?" "AH, PONY WAKE?" asked a very deep baritone voice coming from below the web. Before they could ask any further questions, Shining Armor noticed a set of long, green appendages latch onto the walls before him, which slowly pulled up a figure...no, a thing attached to it. There was a mutual silence between all five stallions, as few words expressed the view in front of their eyes. Thunderlane found a few, but they could describe a lot of things in Everfree. For one, it was a huge, huge sort of a plant, resembling an oversized cabbage, with upper half of its body covered in smaller, messily placed dark green leaves which gave the impression of a mane which demanded a brush and shower. The lower part was mostly devoid of the leaves, leaving only a thick moss to serve as a skin, which covered every single part of its body except for a giant maw, filled with rows of rotten yellow set of teeth covered in slimy, green substance, each tooth larger then any of them. On its base was a root of some sorts, from which multiple appendages stuck out, two of which were used to climb the wall, while several were tied directly into the web they were lying on. "ME HATE FOOD SCREAM!" It grinned from one non-existant ear to other, licking its lips with delight. Soarin screamed and they couldn't blame him for it, especially after it climbed over them and sat on the web, right behind Shining Armor and started inspecting Soarin, who couldn't even tell where it's eyes were. If there were any. "ME START WITH BIRD PONY. ME LIKE WINGS." the vines holding Soarin suddenly raised him above, very slowly closing him to the endless void called opened mouth. Understandably so, Soarin had different ideas. "WHY IS IT ALWAYS ME?!" "LEAVE HIM ALONE!" Thunderlane chimed in "Pick up someone your size!" The vines stopped mid-air as the monster tilted its head. "HUH? BUT ME BIG, PONY NOT BIG." "Well, then," Doctor joined in the conversation "why don't you try and hunt something else? Face it, we're barely a snack, you'll be hungry again in a matter of minutes anyway." "Eyuup!" The monster hummed. Then looked at Soarin, who wasn't sure if he should already just faint and be done with it... or wet himself. Maybe then he'll leave him alone. Or at least, wash him before his early demise. "PONY RIGHT. ME GET BIG FOOD, SO ME NO HUNGRY!" "Atta boy, I knew you were just as smart as you look." Doctor did not lie. "ME EAT PONY NOW AND ME GO FIND MORE FOOD!" "Exactly, that sounds like a brilliant pla-- no wait, what?" "ME NOT EAT PONY FOR A LONG TIME! ONLY BIRD. AND BOAR. AND ALLIGATOR. BUT NO YUMMY. PONY IS YUMMY!" "Well, I tried." "When I said we'll be eaten by plants," started Thunderlane "I DIDN'T MEAN IT!" Shining Armor could clearly hear, but not see the conversation that took place right behind him, neither did they see him, as giant cabbage monster blocked the view entirely. Not that he could even twist his head back enough to notice, anyway. On the bright side, neither was monster paying attention to him, which gave him some time to work with and try to get out. Try as he might, his brute strength was no use here, the vines being much tougher then they looked. He tried to surround himself with barrier and enlarge it just enough to slip out. It could work, but no matter how much he concentrated, he couldn't create a shield slim enough to fit inside. Most of his magical training was spent on efficiency, durability, shape and size, not subtlety, which he started to regret now. If he ever gets out, he swore to get more lessons. Maybe Twilight could tutor him in their off times? Not a bad excuse to spend more time with his little sister. If she was here instead, she could probably just teleport out and incinerate the bloody thing. His train of thought was interrupted by a whisper. He couldn't quite tell who it was, but definitely somepony behind him. He twisted his neck the hardest he could to notice Big Macintosh in the edge of his eye. He couldn't quite see him as a whole, only his hind hooves tied by vines, but one of the hooves did stuck out and rose a bit higher. Shining could swear that Mac was trying to tell him something. Or rather, not tell, but show. Shining Armor's eyes widened at the realization and looked at the vague direction he was showing. And then he saw it. When they all woke up, they were tied up and too scared to notice that their saddlebags were gone, probably fell down the canyon. Not all however. On the right stone wall, in a very dimly lit place, was a single tree branch, sticking out of the stone, on it a single saddlebag, barely holding on a little twig. He narrowed his eyes to get a better look at it. It wasn't that far, all things considered. If he tried hard enough, he could reach it with magic. He gulped and took a deep breath, before glowing his horn and covering the bags with his aura. "H-hey, come on, w-were all rational here," Soarin stuttered, as he tried to keep calm "we can help each other out, like buddies!" "YES, PONY HELP ME. PONY GET EAT. ME NO HUNGRY!" "N-no, I mean't with umm, you know..." he looked around for hints, finding nothing of sorts "...oh, I know! You seem like a pretty swell fellow, but you're alone, right?" "HUH?" cabbage monster tilted its head. So did other stallions, except maybe Shining Armor. "Come on, I bet there's a cute, cabbage lady out there that you had your eyes on (wherever they are)," he smiled brightly, others rolling their eyes once they saw it coming "I happen to be a pro matchmaker and love guru. Ask anypony, or anything in this forest! I have a 100% success rate in Everfree!" by which he meant all one instance. Still more then anypony could claim "what'ya say? Help me, help you?" The monster used two appendages to shrug. "ME NO GOT GENDER." "OH COME ON!" yelled Soarin, as he tried to raise his hooves up. He couldn't, they were still tied up. The conversation above did buy Shining Armor a little more time, which he spent levitating the saddlebags across. He didn't try to be fast, concentrating more on stable grip, fully realizing that if he failed halfway, his last hope would drop dead into the oblivion. Once before him, he identified the apple prints on the bags as ones belonging to Big Macintosh. And he clearly remembered that he had a fruit knife somewhere in there. Shining opened the bags and rummaged through its content. Among the blankets, few cups, unfinished sandwich and some other tools, he did found the knife. A small one, used mostly to peel apples and small vegetables, but what mattered now was not the size, but it's sharpness. And they did cut coconuts with it here. Everfree magic apparently allowed coconuts to grow in a forest, obviously. He grabbed the knife and took a breath once again. Now that he thought about it, what would he do if the monster felt the stab and looked behind? All these vines were technically part of his body, but did he have nerves in them? Only one way to find out. "TALK BORING. ME HUNGRY!" The cabbage opened it's mouth and closed screaming Soarin closer, when suddenly... "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIT!" Everyone turned their attention to Thunderlane, who gasped for breath. He gulped and said. "Don't eat him...first!" everyone tilted their heads "I-I mean, I'm a lot tastier then he is!" "REALLY?" "You are? "Of course I am! I mean, seriously, look at him!" the cabbage did so, but only saw Soarin sheepishly smile "He's a mess! Barely any meat on him! And you know what he does in his free time? Seedy bars, alcohol, banging left and right. Seriously, he could have some weird disease on him." "NO I DONT!" Soarin protested. He knew it was a trick, but it still hurt. "Compared to him," Thunderlane continued "I'm all natural and healthy. None of that fast food crap he stuff himself with!" mostly because it's fast food, and it was expensive in Ponyville, which cannot be said about vegetable grown there. STAB! Shining Armor successfully stabbed the vine he was tied by. He looked behind him to see if there's any reaction from the cabbage, but so far it looked like the coast was clear. So he proceed on freeing himself one slice at a time, which would take some time, but it seemed like his friends had it under control. "Nnnope!" Big Macintosh interrupted them on their conversation "Ahm the tastiest one here! Ahm all muscle, no fat!" "RED PONY SMELL APPLE! ME NO EAT PLANT! ME NO CANNIBAL!" SNAP! One vine down, several more to go. Still no sign of detection. "Oh, oh, me!" Doctor chimed in "I have two hearts!" "WHAT?" they all shouted, as Doctor tried to shrug. "No really, I have two hearts. And two hearts means that I pump more blood, so I'm a lot tastier then them, who only have one, so they pump twice less. Simple science!" Thunderlane rolled his eyes. "I don't know what's a bigger bullcrap. The science, or your anatomy." "Hate me all you want, but that is the truth! SNAP! Two down, Shining Armor could almost free his front hooves now. He kept sawing. "ME CONFUSED. ME EAT ALL PONY!" "NO!" everypony protested. "BUT ME HUNGRY!" "Well yes, but pony tasty," said Doctor "if you eat us all now, then we're gone. Don't you want to savor the taste a bit more?" "UMMM..." "Yeah, he's right!" Thunderlane agreed "You don't get many ponies around here, do you?" "NO, BUT..." "Then you MUST treasure us," added Soarin "we're a delicacy you know!" “UMM, ME NOT KNOW...” "Actually, why not do the smart thing?" Doctor added as a sinister plan entered his head "Why not just keep us as livestock and breed some more?" "WHAT?" everyone shouted. SNAP! Another vine snapped, letting Shining Armor finally move his front hooves freely. One more and he's out. "You can't be serious!" "PONY NOT WORK THAT WAY!" "Eyuup!" "Trust me, I'm a Doctor!" he gladly pronounced, convincing a total number of zero listeners "I have two hearts, so there's twice as much blood flowing through my brain, therefore..." "BULLCRAP!" SNAP! The cabbage monster finally snapped and roared at the ponies, scaring the living hell out of them and covering them with more slime then they wanted. "PONY ANNOY! ME EAT SILENT PONY FIRST! SILENT PONY NOT ANNOY! SNAP! With one last snap, Shining Armor was finally free and able to stand on all four hooves. He stretched his muscles and already focused his thoughts on freeing others. Maybe if he could somehow get them to make him look the other direction, then he could free Macintosh, then act as a bait until Mac frees others, and then... "WHY HORN PONY FREE?" Shining Armor could not see its eyes, still hidden behind a messy leaves acting as hair. But he saw the mouth. There were no smiles. He blinked once. And then one more time. "...buck."