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// Chapter Six: A Bit Too Steep 
// Story: Dr. Hooves and the Broken Box 
// by Lyichir 
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Carrot Top was waiting for the Doctor and Derpy when they got back to the house. She seemed to have calmed down a bit since that morning.
“I was wondering when you two would get back. I finished cleaning up the kitchen a little while ago.” She grinned slyly at the Doctor. “The hardest part was unclogging the sink. It seems like somepony didn’t actually eat as much of the food from the fridge as they claimed.”
Busted. “I’m really sorry about that,” said the Doctor, looking forlorn. “I… wasn’t feeling myself last night. I had an upset stomach, and…”
“Save your apologies,” said Carrot Top. “I realized I didn’t even introduce myself to you this morning. I’m—“
“Carrot Top,” the Doctor said, happy to finally be ahead of the curve. “Derpy’s told me a little bit about you.”
“—Golden Harvest,” she continued, looking a bit more like the annoyed pony the Doctor had seen that morning. “Carrot Top is just what she calls me. I’m a gardener by trade, but lately I’ve also filled the role of landlord. Which brings us to our rent discussion.”
The Doctor knew this had been coming. “You know, I actually only needed a place to stay last night," he said apologetically. "I really wasn’t looking for long-term accommodations.”
“That’s an awful shame,” said Golden Harvest. “In that case, I only need your room and board for last night.”
The Doctor was shocked. “Derpy just let me in last night,” he stammered. “I wasn’t aware there would be a fee.”
“Apparently, neither did she,” said Golden Harvest. “I run a tight ship here, and I can’t just provide room and board on a charitable basis.” Her eyes narrowed.  “Particularly not when a tenant wastes all the food in my fridge.”
The Doctor’s face fell. How much did he and Derpy spend that day just to restock the fridge? And Golden Harvest seemed like somewhat of a penny-pincher, so he doubted she’d offer him any sort of discount for lodging.
“I’ll tell you what,” continued the ginger-haired pony. “Since you seem eager to get up and out of here, I’ll charge you a flat 100 bits for last night and we’ll call it even.”
100 bits. That didn’t sound cheap, assuming the coins Derpy had been paying for groceries with were bits… and she hadn’t spent more than five of them on any one item…
“I’m really sorry,” said the Doctor, “but I really just arrived in town last night. I don’t have any money, or really, any sort of employment. If there’s any other way I could repay you, I’d be honored to help, but I can’t contribute anything monetary.”
It was the truth. If he had a working TARDIS, or his sonic screwdriver, he could probably earn plenty of money as a magician or street performer. At the moment, though, all he had was a body he wasn’t completely accustomed to and a barebones understanding of the world he seemed to have gotten stuck in.

Golden Harvest, for her credit, seemed more shocked than angry. “You don’t have anything?” she asked despondently. “This is all wrong. I thought you said you were a doctor!”
“I’m not that sort of doctor,” he replied. “I’m more of… a traveling doctor. I go from place to place, and if someone there has a problem, I do my best to fix it. I do it all on a volunteer basis, and right now I can’t even do that. My mode of transport and all my tools are broken. I have absolutely nothing to work with.”
Golden Harvest looked almost heartbroken. “Well,” she said, “that changes everything.”
The Doctor looked back up at her. “You’re not going to charge me?” he asked hopefully.
“I am absolutely going to charge you,” she countered. “When and only when you are back on your feet and have some way to pay.”
It wasn’t the most generous offer, but it was more than the Doctor expected from a pony who he had previously considered to be greedy and abrasive.
“Until then… you can stay in the guest room. We need to work on getting you a job, and in the meantime you can work on getting your transport and your tools and whatever else fixed.”
“Fantastic!” exclaimed the Doctor, and almost immediately he regretted the enthusiasm in his voice. He could see tears forming in the corners of Golden Harvest’s eyes.
“Once you can pay me back, I expect you to get back on the road and out of my hair,” snapped Golden Harvest. She marched up the stairs, and the Doctor heard a door slam.
“Well, that could have gone better, couldn’t it?” The Doctor stamped his hoof in frustration. “Derpy, I have another question. What exactly is it about that mare that makes you choose to share a home with her?”
Derpy put the last item from her saddlebag into the fridge and shut the door. “I don’t know, Dr. Hooves. She’s usually so nice, but you seem to have put her in a bad mood…”
“Oh, so this is my fault now, is it?” The Doctor stamped his hoof again. “Well lucky me! My first day in town, and I had to choose to stay in a flat with the most temperamental pony in the universe.”
He grabbed a candle in his mouth and pushed open the door. “I’m going out, Derpy,” he said through his gritted teeth. “If Golden Harvest asks where I am, tell her I’m working on getting out of her hair.”
“Doctor, come back!” Derpy rushed over to the door to catch him, but he was already halfway down the block. “It’s scheduled to rain!”
“It’s clear as a bell, Derpy!” the Doctor yelled. “I’ll be back when I’m good and ready!”

He made his way back to the TARDIS, alone once again. The streets were empty, now, despite the beautiful weather. All for the better, he thought to himself as he opened the door of the police box. No witnesses that way. Once he got inside, he spent the better part of an hour trying to light the candle with only hooves. No sooner had it finally lit when he heard a crash of thunder, followed by the pattering sound of a barrage of rain hitting the TARDIS’s outer doors. Derpy had been right about the rain. How had she known? But it didn’t matter now. He was inside, and he had a light, and he could finally work without distractions. And once the TARDIS was fixed, he could finally escape from this universe and get back to Normal Space. Home, or the closest thing he had to a home.
He might have gotten the TARDIS working right then and there, and sailed back to his own universe and no pony would ever know where he had gone. He might have, if he hadn’t been interrupted by a knock at the door.