Spike
The tea was marvelous, a simmering cesspool of flavor and fragrance. An ethereal warmth that tickled my neck as much as my fancy, reminding me of the days I spent pining after Rari-
...No. Not gonna remember that...
Anyways, Dameion’s lady friend had escorted us back to the really awesome castle in the distance. The stone seemed a little dead and desolate, but the interior was superior in a way. Busts of what seemed like famous individuals glared at us from the sides of the walls, making me a little nervous as the purple insole framed in gold thread gave way to my steps.
My armor was becoming a little tight, which I chalked up to my abnormal body growing a little bit. I mean, anything is possible seeing as how the four of us were currently walking down the hallway and drinking tea.
Their sense of normalcy is a little over-the-top.
“It’s nice to see that Dameion has made some great friends,” Lady Crim-Artemis exclaimed as she took a healthy gulp of her tea, “But he’s yet to elaborate on who you two really are! I’m very interested!”
I scratched the back of my neck nervously, not really expecting to give a brief summary of myself. That, and I don’t want to tell the leader of a country that I’m on the run from the Princess of the fucking Sun.
“We are his friends, Luna and Spike,” Luna spoke up from my side. This brought all of our attention to her, along with my whispered thanks, “We hail from a land just south from this town. It is a land called Equestria and I am the Co-Ruler of that nation, alongside my sister.” Luna explained to Artemis, whose face lit up like a foal’s during Nightmare Night.
“That makes you a princess,” Artemis began in jovial disbelief, “I can’t believe that I’m in the presence of actual royalty right now!”
Dameion raised an eyebrow at her.
“Oops! I meant two royal figures, ehehehe...” She laughed nervously.
“You’re pretty much royalty yourself, Artemis. I mean, it must take a worthy leader to usher these people for a thousand years, not to mention how strong you must be at combat considering a new leader is up for grabs every year.” I added my two bits into the conversation, watching as Artemis blushed and rubbed the back of her head with a silly grin on her face.
Her tongue was even poking out a little bit.
Adorable.
As we geared to turn a corner, another figure came blasting from the corridor we were getting ready to head down, his face the very definition of rage.
I noticed a black skull on a necklace around his neck, alerting me to danger instantly. Something about this guy...
...Sends a chill down my spine...
OH STARS ABOVE!!! IS HE NAKED!!!??? “HOT DAMN!!!”
Dameion
Leaping Lightning Bolts! Who the fuck is this creep!?
I hopped in front of our group, snarling at the streaker as he merely batted an irritated eye at me.
“You’re the fuck that killed Maxxis Murdok, right? Now that I think about it, you seem a little familiar...” The Anthro stated with an inquisitive run of his chin, still neglecting the fact that he’s in his fucking birthday suit, “Your face is a little irritating to look at.”
“Want to make something of it, weirdo!? Who runs around castle without anything to cover themselves!?” I yelled out and balled my fists up, feeling the lightning streak through their creases.
“I don’t have to wear clothes in my fucking house, dipshit! And for your information, fighting me would be like flipping off the fucking grim reaper, you arrogant prick!”
“Stop it right now you two!”
Both of our heads snapped around to face Artemis, who was glaring at us with such anger that I felt a chill go up my spine.
“You two should be hugging one another,” She yelled and stomped her foot before her face took on a puzzled appearance, “No, maybe not. Perhaps this is the actual way a reunion for the both of you should play out.”
“What are you talking about?” The Anthro Dragon asked in complete confusion.
“Yeah I gotta agree with Mr. Freeball on this one.” I added, getting a growl out of the guy next in front of me. I growled right back before we both crossed our arms and turned our heads away from one another with a huff.
“You mean you two don’t recognize each other!? What!?”
“Well it’s not like he’s related to me or something! What did you expect, a fucking orgy!?”
“Hey! Don’t speak to Artemis like that, dickweed!”
“You wanna go, pretty-boy? Cause there’s a size twelve greave waiting to find its way up your ass!”
“Let’s see you try it, snowflake!”
“STOP,” Artemis roared as she stepped in between us. She gave both of us a glare that silenced any further insults, “You,” She forcefully jabbed a finger into the naked anthro’s chest, “Stop taking things so anally! I thought you promised to get your anger under control a thousand years ago!”
He lowered his head, making me chuckle in victory. You get him, Arte-
“And you,” My eyes widened when she used her other hand to poke me in the chest, “What’s with the sudden abrasiveness!? You two are supposed to be hugging it out right now!”
“But I-”
“Ah-bup-bup! Hug each other.” She demanded with narrowed eyes.
“Ew, gay.” The anthro said with disgust, making Artemis grab his nipple and twist it hard.
“AHHHHHHHH, let go! Pleeeeassssse, let goooo!”
“Hug him.”
“Put some clothes on.”
“No. You’re gonna strip and hug him. Since you guys want to make the guest feel awkward,” Artemis threw a hand out to indicate Spike and Luna with nervous faces at suddenly being pulled into this, “I’m gonna make you two feel awkward. Now strip.”
I whined and compiled, my buff body exposed to the world with the removal of my princely robe. Of course, the undergarments had to come off next, which I did painstakingly slowly because of the embarrassment.
“Splendid! Now hug.”
“Bu-”
“No.”
“He-” The light blue anthro tried.
“NOW, ZERRIS!”
The anthro spread his arms and waved his hands towards himself while looking away from me. I was sure the floor was going to curl up and die under that gaze.
“Wait a minute,” I breathed out in disbelief, watching Artemis’s smile grow devilishly as she walked behind me and pushed my back, sending me into Zerris’s waiting torso. I was wrapped up in what was probably the most homseual thing for two heterosexual males to do, “You’re Zerris!? You don’t remember me!?”
“What are you talking about, you fucking loon. I haven’t met you a single day in my life, and I’ve been alive for a long time!”
“Zerris it’s me,” I exclaimed while hugging him tighter, earning myself a snort of anger from the buff anthro, “It’s Dameion!? Remember!?”
His body tensed up before I felt his hands on the sides of my stomach, effectively pushing me away to see the disbelief on his face.
“Stop fucking with me. You were reported dead after the fight with your father. No one has seen you for over a thousand fucking years, and you think you can just waltz back in here and hug me in your fucking birthday suit like that’ll get me to forgive...your...dumb...”
Zerris sighed before turning around and walking off, one or two sniffles letting me know what was really happening.
“And just like that, everything’s right in the world!” Artemis stated happily as she left us with teacup in hand to chase down the fleeing Zerris. I turned back to my friends, who were busy trying their hardest to hold their neutral expressions.
“Give me a minute to redress, you two. We’ll continue to explore after that.” They nodded and I went to work.
It took ten seconds to restore my formal appearance, and it took another two in order to apologize profusely for what they just saw. Even I am a little perplexed on how easily Artemis bent me to her will.
I’ll have to bend her later...
“Of course.” Luna responded for Spike and herself as I led them down the corridor. We conversed on matters pertaining to both of our countries, even though I had little to offer besides what was found in the library while I stayed at the Murdok residence.
“So this country’s existed for over a thousand years? Incredible,” Spike’s girlfriend stated with an amused smile on her black face, “My sister and I haven’t heard of...Mythril, before. Finding out a land so grand as this exists has been a wonderful experience, and I hope Equestria will be able to have peaceful relations!”
“That’s not a bad idea, actually,” I agreed while taking a sip of my tea, “By the way it sounds, Equestria is heavily loaded with gems. It just so happens that we’re overburdened with precious metals, something your people hold in great regard, am I wrong?”
“You are correct, Prince Dameion. If you’re willing, I will draft up a treaty to get the proverbial ball rolling! I have a feeling that both our nations will profit greatly from this!”
Spike
And here I am, the third wheel behind this conversation. Luna and Dameion continued talking politics as I gazed out the many windows flanking us on the right. Guards in silver armor made their rounds, which ended up boring me to a certain point.
Grumbling, I took a look into the sky and beheld something...weird.
“Why’s a star out? It’s only evening...”
Said star got bigger...
My eyes widened, “Oh shit...” I breathed out in disbelief as the sound of faint roaring made itself apparent.
“Spike?” Luna inquired with a tone of concern, making me snap my head to face her with a look of panic on my face.
“GET THE FUCK DOWN!!!” I yelled as I scooped Luna up, ran towards the nearest wooden door and rammed the tartarus out of it, bursting into what looked like a large pantry. Dameion came through the door, spreading his arms and blocking my view of the window as the roaring got louder.
“What’s going on!?” He yelled in worry as I cradled Luna under me, making her wiggle in vain to free herself.
“GET IN HERE AND COVER YOUR HEAD!!!”
“Woah, dude! You got to chill-”
KRAKOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!!!
“WHAT THE FU-” Dameion’s yell was cut short when the room lit up in a bright white light, debris falling all around us.
“What’s going on, Celestia!? Why would you crash into a castle, possibly killing innocent people!? This isn’t like you at all!!!” I yelled in my head as the explosion from earlier rendered my ears completely useless for a while, making me tighten my hold on Luna.
A large piece of brick fell on the back of my armor. The vibration made the noise ‘hear-able’ before it went away. The whole castle was shaking, and I couldn’t hear anything or see anyone!
This is by far the scariest moment of my life!