Chapter 39
“Wooshing, slooshing. Flippy flop, wham wham. Kerplunk, zing, skug. The Tardis speaks to everyone, but only those who understand what she says can speak back.” The Doctor explained. A rather strange thought crossed my mind, and I voiced it.
“How do you know it’s a she?” I ventured.
“Because I met her once. Now Edwin, I’m going to try and teach you how to speak to the Tardis.” The Doctor retorted rather cryptically. I decided to drop the subject, and take up a new one.
“Why?”
“Because one of these days, I might be unable to pilot it. You would need to immerse yourself in the telepathic interfaces, and pilot the Tardis with your mind.” The Doctor reasoned.
“That’s cool.”
“Yep.”
“Can you let me out?” I pleaded.
“Nope.”
“Why not?”
“Because to pilot the Tardis, it helps to have seen the time streams and wormholes that the Tardis uses to traverse time and space.” He rationalized.
“But why am I in an Inertia chamber?” I asked, extremely vested in leaving this small, cramped tube.
“Because I can’t open the doors while the Tardis is travelling and just let you see the time stream unshielded. But, I can throw things out into the stream of time. Like inertia chambers. Or ponies that ask a lot of questions.”
“I’m not liking this idea. I’m not liking this idea at all.”
“Tough.” The Doctor said, and pushed a bright green panel on the Tardis. There was a slight hissing noise.
“Welcome to TARDIS TT type forty, mark Three; pirated active defense system inertia chamber. You currently occupy chamber four in bay number three. This is not a drill. Ejection from a TARDIS is not reccomended or approved of in Gallifreyan society, and should not be used for recreation. Ejection is estimated in ninety-five seconds, through slice Alpha in the tunnel Praxis, number nine hundred and seventy-” The cool female voice announcing my travel plans was interrupted by the Doctor.
“Don’t listen to any of that prattle. We’ve got a job to do. You are going to be ejected into a jetstream of time that will deposit you at exactly the right time and place for your lesson with Alucard.” The Doctor said, with some interference from the speaker
“Doctor, I’m scared.” I whispered. The Doctor laughed, which sounded very grating through the speakers.
“Good. I would be worried if you weren’t.” He said.
“Ejection in sixty seconds.” The female voice said, as calm as ever.
“Any last words, Edwin? These might be your last minute alive.” He said somewhat jokingly.
“This isn’t funny, Doctor!” I shouted. The Doctor’s face immediately dissolved into a scowl.
“I’m not trying to be funny.” He said. I gulped.
“Tell Luna I love her.” I blurted out. The Doctor smiled a little bit, and his eyes softened up.
“How bland. Care to add to that?” The Doctor inquired. I took a little bit wondering.
“I was going to ask her to m-” I was interrupted by a big gust of wind, pressurizing the Inertia chamber. A little red notice popped up in front of me, which consisted of little red numbers on a red little display, counting down from a little red ten. A large opaque shield slid up between the outside of my inertia chamber and the rest of the Tardis. A small little hole opened up in the floor of the chamber. There was little blue and orange wisps, some red, with brilliantly terrifying blackness underneath. All I could do was look down at my hind legs, which were silhouetted by the strange background underneath me. There was a sudden silence; the wind had stopped. I immediately looked up. The little red numbers all read zero. I gulped.
Nothing
Nothing
Nothing
Woosh
I fell straight through the bottom of the tardis, screaming the whole way. I beat on the glass with my hooves, trying my best to get out of it. I looked down through the bottom of the chamber, and then all around me. I stopped screaming. It... It was everything. A sudden influx of knowledge. I knew everything that is. Everything that was. Everything that will be. The streams of time opened themselves to me, and let me take from them what I wished. Anything that I wanted to know, I knew. Nothing was hidden from me. I was there for hours, days, years, just learning. I knew that the stars Septimus and Culaan of the binary system of Sigmus became ensnared through a galaxial collision, and the binary stars caught each other’s gravity as the two galaxies passed through each other. I knew that the system of Equus, home to Equestria, was the only geocentric planet in existence. I knew, I knew, I knew. Suddenly, I knew everything. There was nothing else that the streams of Time had to give me that I did not have. I knew what I had to do.
“Tardis.” I commanded.
“Yes.” the cool voice responded from above me. I looked up. The ‘cork’ in the vial that I occupied was actually a complex life support and navigation system.
“Show me Slice Alpha, Tunnel Praxis nine-seven-three.” I ordered. The computing system highlighted a small yellow line fluctuating in a big blue tunnel to the slight left of me, along with various numbers that displayed important information. I was rather near the opening.
“Plot a course and give me intercept times. Execute when compiled. Disable artgrav, maintain inertial integrity at three.” I said sternly. The Tardis needed a firm hoof. Immediately, a set of numbers appeared before me and I floated up slightly to the exact center of the cramped vial. I scrolled through the blue lists of intercept times with my mind, and I selected one that was a little over an hour. I leaned back in my chamber as I thought to myself.
“Captain Shell?” The Tardis computers ventured.
“Yes?” I asked, not opening my eyes.
“I have a small selection of music for you to choose from, if you wish.”
“How big is the library?”
“two exabytes.” She said. I whistled in awe.
“Play some earth music, if you have it. Classical, twenty-five decibels, with a gradient to ten decibels over the space of twenty minutes. Wake me when we reach Slice Alpha.” I said, and closed my eyes. Soft, sweet Beethoven played above me, and I relaxed. I slept the most refreshing sleep I had ever slept. I was not a android, but I dreamt of electric sheep.
A light brrong awakened me. I opened my eyes groggily.
“Tardis. How far are we from Slice Alpha?”
“Point nine parsecs, an estimated three minute’s distance at our current velocity.” The computer spoke. I went through the entry sequence of the inertia chambers for the correct model of Tardis while I thought of the orders to give it.
“At point three parsecs raise radiation shields in addition to blinders. Inertial dampeners up to twelve. Keep me updated.” I said. The Tardis wordlessly complied and prompted the times for the shields. They quickly ticked to zero, and a black smudge appeared on the bottom of the chamber. It quickly spread up the sides, protecting me from radiation and the blinding light of re-entry. A small red notice lit up on the wall of the Vial. It was another counter, with the innocuous heading of ‘Landing’. It was a two minute timer.
“Tardis, when landing sequence is completed, raise external air shields along with radiation blocker and blinders. Activate artgrav upon completion. Wait for my confirmation to open the doors.” I said. There was no rumbling, no shaking, nothing. The inertia chamber performed exactly as designed. I felt nothing, and the landing counter slowly ticked down to zero. There was a slight hiss, and the black all around me quickly receded. It showed the crisp, airless scenery of Sigmus Five. There were tiny patches of glass all around me. The inertia chamber was buried a few feet in the ground, revealing the black soot. I looked back up at the outside. There was a slight shimmering as the air filled the boundaries of the air shield.
“Captain Shell, orders complete and awaiting intent to exit.”
“Not yet. Wait.” I said. The computer tagged random particles stirred up by the air, labeling them with mass, size, distance, and composition. Suddenly, there was a priority tag on something a few miles away. I squinted at the hologram imposed on the object. It was pretty big, whatever it was.
“Tardis, justify priority tag.”
“Priority tag is specified as a danger or something of import in relation to the occupant. Tag has a significant mass and speed, with rather erratic vectors. Considered a weapon, recommend defense system activation.”
“Disregard recommendations. It might be a meteor.”
“Not possible. Vectors too irregular to be orbital in origin.”
“Get me a visual.” I said, and a square section of the Vial suddenly zoomed in on the tag. It was a wobbly white shape, still a few miles out. I squinted at it some more.
“Alucard.” I whispered. Pressed my hooves against the glass slightly. I remembered that the computer was awaiting my cue to open the doors.
“Priority tag nonthreatening. Open chamber doors.” I said. The plug in the top of vial hissed a little bit with escaping air, and then popped out audibly. I looked back up, and crawled out of the vial. It was at a slight angle, so I could climb out easily. I reached the ledge, and I saw the cork of the vial whizzing and whirring. I jumped out of it, and floated down on the low gravity of Sigmus. I looked up at the sky. Alucard was flying down to where I was. I grinned, wanting to see him. He finally reached me with a gigantic swoop of his wings. He landed in front of me, barely disturbing the dust in front of me. He smiled benevolently, his wide red eyes creasing at the corners. He said nothing for a long while, only staring at me contemplatively. He said nothing for a long time.
“Teacher?” I asked, but Alucard said nothing. He turned from me, and began to stare up at the two stars, which were moving together slowly.
“Tell me how this system came to be binary.” Alucard said slowly, his rumbling voice making me shiver. I thought for a moment.
“Septimus, the slightly larger red star, was the original inhabitant of the Sigmus system. A few million years ago, about five point three, there was another galaxy that intersected the orbit of this one. The Sigmus system went straight through another star system, and caught the younger star Culaan. It’s been classified as a binary system about one million years after that, when the orbits of the two became far less erratic and able to maintain constant temperatures for carbon, methane, and fluorine based life in the first three planets.” I exhorted. Alucard smiled.
“This dirt. What is it made of?” Alucard inquired again, furrowing the ash under his feet.
“It was silica with iron substrates, which was what gave the dirt its red color. Now it’s only the layer of soil under the silica completely carbonized. The energy from the Tardis burned off everything organic, with a few patches of glass where the silica remained.”
“Where did the silica go?” Alucard asked of me.
“Space. It’s currently forming a loose system of rings around this planet. Barely visible, and likely to stay that way.” I explained.
“Who was the fifth elector of the Gegmi Tau republic?”
“Taos the Invoker.”
“What are the prime numbered moons of Beta Centaruk?
“Hydrax, Syphix, and Noose.”
“Why is it called noose?” Alucard wondered. I laughed.
“Because it’s shaped like a doughnut.” I said. Alucard rumbled, laughing. It was a joyous noise.
“Good. The Doctor complied with my request.” He said, coming down from his standing position. He curled up in a circle, with his head facing me. He sighed, with smoke pouring out of his nostrils. He closed his eyes for a moment, relaxing slightly. He sighed, and spoke to me with his closed eyes.
“Do you know what happened to you when you viewed the streams of time, Edwin?” Alucard grumbled of me. I thought for a moment.
“I attained knowledge.” I said simply.
“Yes. More specifically, the knowledge made itself manifest in you. You know everything that you would ever need to know. Tell me how many digits twenty four to the ninetieth power has.” The large dragon rumbled. My mind did not hesitate to provide me with an answer.
“One hundred and twenty five.” I said quickly. Alucard smiled and made a strange gruffing noise.
“Good, good.” Alucard was about to say something else, and then he hesitated. “You are no longer afraid of me, Edwin.” He said somewhat surprised. I paused as well in silent shock.
“I suppose that I am not.” I whispered.
“Even better. Then I must breach the subject of today’s lesson to you, which is why I live on this planet, away from mortal life.” the white giant said somewhat grumpily.
“What is it that I am to learn, Teacher?” I asked. Alucard raised his head to look at the stars. He seemed somewhat distracted.
“You must learn to use the Aethr ruthlessly. Without hesitation, you must be able to kill things with the flow. There are simple ways to do this, and there are showy ways to do this, but all are useful. You must-” Alucard rumbled on tonelessly. I thought about what he was saying. I must learn how to become an animal, he was saying. I must learn to kill without thought. I must become violent and thoughtless, he explained to me calmly. The old me would have abhorred the concept. It would have argued vehemently. It would have sat down and done nothing. But that was not me. I am not Edwin Shell anymore. I am Luna’s. I would have done anything to keep her safe. And this was one of the things that I must do. Alucard finished, obviously concerned by my silence throughout.
“Let’s get started.” I coldly stated.