My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic
Reharmonized Ponies POV Series
"Sapphire Shores"
By Kendell2 and Alex Warlorn
My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic
Reharmonized Ponies POV Series
"Sapphire Shores"
By Kendell2 and Alex Warlorn
Good afternoon ladies and gentlestallions! This is Sapphire Shores coming ta you live from our cap-pit-tal city of Canterlot! How do you do? Fine how are you? How ya come on? Pretty good sure as you're born! I've got the hottest jams and the coolest gems! So get ready for a seeensational explosion!
That's the script for my next tour's opening spiel. Did I write it myself? Of course I did darling, Sapphire Shores ain't nopony's mouthpiece! I'm involved in my concerts choreography and special effects like nopony's business, but it sure is my business sweetie and enough golden records ta make a side of flapjacks says I do it well! Surprised? I just like ta add a personal touch ta my shows.
So what brings you darlings here? Wanna talk about my new single? Or the foal hospital in Canterlot I helped fund? Charity works, gets ya great publicity and great social credit among the rich and famous! Not that I need either. Ponies in Neighpon know my face! And I've got foals in Zebrafrica wearing t-shirts with my face on it! Got them for free of course. How do I feel about the foals themselves? Okay, I don't like braggin' about it (some ponies might get the wrong idea), but it was my idea, not my PR department's, when I gave those free tickets ta the amusement park ta those orphans...no I've got family, pretty big one really. But... ya know, it's a scary thought not ta have anypony alongside you, ta be all alone. Trust me, a foalhood is a horrible thing ta lose, and I don't want ta see anypony lose theirs.
Huh. Ya want ta talk about that day? The day Equestria got unzipped like Blueblood's pants? Blueblood doesn't wear pants? Trust me honey, that's the least crazy thing ya could talk about that day. Do we really have ta talk about it? Might help? Look honey I already... alright, if you really think so.
I had a biiiig show planned baby, it was a year since Princess Luna was back on the throne and bat ponies were dancin' in Canterlot again (I actually hired a few for a remake of my music video Chiller!), and who better than the pony of pop ta entertain Canterlot's great and not so great. Guest of honor was still recovering so it wasn't as big as everypony thought it was gonna be, but when I put on a show, I put on a show hun!
Unfortunately, crazy weather got my concert canceled, or so I thought. Didn't know what was goin' on at first. Raining chocolate milk and cotton candy clouds? Thought some pegasus just had a sweet sense of humor. Though I didn't quite understand why it canceled the concert, it was indoors...Then some guards started telling us performers ta keep the citizens entertained and the castle was on lockdown (typical emergency situation procedures, stay out of the streets and indoors where it's safer) and they wanted ta make sure there wasn't a panic if possible. Apparently something about discord being unleashed, well, this crazy weather looked more like freakiness than fightin'. I don't think they ever got the chance ta tell Octavia about it, she'd been playin' at the time and once that girl gets in her groove, she don't like ta be interrupted. I know how that is.
So there I was, sitting there, listenin' ta her do her thing, waiting for my number ta come up. I like Octavia's music; it's definitely got a LOT of heart in it. And it's nice ta see another big name who doesn't let the spotlight make 'em a snob. And I had plenty around me, good and bad, least I didn't have ta deal with Princess Celestia's pet royal idiot today. It's bad enough the tabloids are saying we're dating. NO I HAVEN'T EVER BEEN MOUNTED BY HIM! Uh...could you cross out that last part? Foals might end up reading this.
Me and the Prince? Oh we've met. I actually saw him once when he was a foal in Canterlot, in that fancy ivory chariot of his with his fancy servants, he had a hoof mark on his face, crying. Spoiled colt must have talked back ta his parents.
Him as a stallion? I've met 'em a bijillion times! We travel the same social circles after all.
He's blindly loyal ta his 'Auntie' and obeys her without question. Heard tell that a tiny circle of Aristocrats had suggested ta him once ta be the figurehead of a movement ta remove Princess Celestia from power and put it in the hands of the herd (meaning themselves, at the time the Princess was trying ta give the common ponies more freedoms, something those aristocrats didn't like). He ran straight ta 'Auntie' and told her everything. And as a showmare, I can appreciate that he can have the IQ of a squash, and with no respect for anypony not nobility, and STILL have a reputation as a lady's mare ta anypony who hasn't met'em. Let it never be said the Princess lets anything go ta waste, only she would realize the pony everypony else but the tabloids hate was a perfect diplomat able ta say nice things ta creatures you hate the guts of. And he's actually a decent navigator, been ta a party on one of his ships and he definitely knows how ta plot out a cruise.
No I haven't dated 'em, if my producers ever demand I get a coltfriend, I've got plenty of other stallions I'd rather choose from.
Right near me is Hoity Toity...we've talked. He's also how I found my newest line of outfits! He's a bit hard ta peg down ta be honest. He's not a bad guy, but he can be positively brutal when critiquing a bad outfit. But unlike a lot of Canterlot ponies, he doesn't change his opinion based on what's hot and what's not, or stick by it no matter how wrong it's being proved. You have a bad showing your first time, he'll tear ya ta shreds, but if your next one's brilliant? Honey, he'll let ya know it. Gotta respect that in a stallion, and a critic. His positive review of Miss Rarity was how I got my collection of jewel studded outfit for my last tour! I respect critics, but some of 'em like that art critic Praiser Pan can be a bit too harsh sometimes, and a lot of them go with trends. Hoity Toity goes with what he thinks.
There were a few other ponies around too, not all of 'em big names. Some where just high society types enjoying the show, but a few of 'em were just civilians visiting the city who hadn't been able ta head back home when the festivities were canceled. I don't think they knew exactly what was going on, but the weird weather was enough ta scare some ponies even without some kind of other craziness having the guards on high alert.
That's when I heard some crying from nearby.
I looked over ta see a little Earth Pony filly just sittin' all by her lonesome and crying her eyes out. I took a look around, nopony else was payin' her any mind. Did they just not see her? Well, what pony in their right mind wouldn't do something about this?
"Hey there, filly," I said, trotting over to her. "Where's your parents?"
"I...I don't know..." she muttered, giving a whimper. She was a little blank flank, white mane, and beige coat. "I'm lost..."
I frowned. Poor little filly. "Well how about we do something about that, sweetie? I'll help ya find your parents."
"T-Thank you..."
She looked up at me. And that's when I noticed; her eyes were red. It was weird. Not that she had red eyes, lots of ponies have 'em like Vinyl Scratch (nice girl, sure knows how ta throw a party). There was just something a little weird about them. But then again, lots of ponies were weird, kind of ta be expected when we're all different.
She gave a big gasp. "You're Sapphire Shores!"
I gave a smile. "The one and only, you a fan?"
"Yeah! Your music is awesome! I listen to it all the time! We were actually here to see you!"
"Well, glad ta hear it, hon. I'll be up soon, but we gotta let Octavia finish her number. Girl puts her heart into her music."
"Oh, that's ok, her music is...okay..." I think the filly liked Octavia's music a little more than she let on, nice ta see she was being so polite about it.
"Well, while she's finishing up, let's go take a look around for your parents, little lady. What's your name?"
"Oh, it's Eris." Odd name, but can't say it wasn't pretty.
"Alright, Eris, let's go see if we can find your parents, what are their names?"
"Oh, their names are Phobia and Void."
Family had weird names. But still, started trotting around looking for these two. "What do they look like?"
She looked a tad annoyed for some reason. "Oh...They're hard to miss. Dad has broken wings and mom's horn is broken...there was a...carriage accident."
"Say no more, sweetie," I replied. I wasn't about ta make a foal dig up bad memories, and that was more than enough. "Got any siblings who we could look for?"
"I had five, two colts and two fillies...But one of my brothers is gone...Well...two of 'em, but mama says we aren't allowed to talk about the other one..."
I decided not ta ask about that one. "Lots of siblings huh? I have quite a few too. What are they like?"
"Big brother is kinda lazy and rebellious, big sister messes things up a lot but is really nice and sweet and creative, and bigger sister is kinda scary and has a stone hoof!"
I blinked. "Stone hoof?"
"Cockatrice." She seemed ta shudder a bit at that.
"Ah, got it. Well, she should be hard ta miss...Had a rough life, haven't yah darlin'?"
"Yeah...it's been really hard. My parents raised me since I was really, really little to be part of the family business."
That made me feel a little uncomfortable for some reason...
"Really?...Well, my parents raised me ta be a singer."
"And yer a really great one!"
"Thanks dear."
"So why don't you have a singing cutie mark? Like a pretty microphone or a little birdie or somethin'?"
"Oh. That's complicated dearie."
"Oh really? Tell me! Tell me! Did you lose it in a fire? Did you fall in a pile of erasers? Did you give it to a blank flank who didn't have one? Oh! Did you lose your memory? I heard that could happen!"
"I just, never got one."
"Never got one?" the filly blinked. "That can happen?"
"Well...yes. It doesn't happen often though..." I explained. Yes, I think everypony knows by now, I'm an adult blank flank. For a while, my producers had me hide it. Thought it wouldn't look good for a popstar ta be a blank. Well, it never really mattered ta me honestly...at the time, but I went along with it since, well, producers and all that (hadn't started ta take more control of myself at the time). Ta be honest I think producers are scarier than Nightmare Moon sometimes. But I sure showed them when the tabloids got ahold of it. I just rolled with it, since like I said, I hadn't really been bothered by it at the time and turns out the idea of an adult blank flank not caring about being blank boosted my appeal! Who'd have thought?
"Why did you never get a Cutie Mark?"
"I..." I hadn't really thought of it. I'd just never had one, that was it. I just hadn't thought why, just knew I didn't. "I don't know..."
The filly just looked up at me curiously. "How do you not know?"
"I just...don't..."
"Then how are you so good at singing if it's not your Mark?"
"Well...I guess I'm just that good," I replied. And it was true, or so I thought. Being outed as a blank flank impressed ponies because I didn't have singing as my talent. Ta them, that just made me more impressive. "Lots of ponies think so."
"Are you sure that they do? I'd be afraid they just liked laughing at me."
I blinked. "Well...I..."
"I mean foals laugh at blank flanks all the time, so why wouldn't ponies laugh at a grown up one?"
"Well," I looked back at my blank flank. "Ponies learn as they get older not ta say such mean things ta each other."
"So they learn to lie to each other?"
"Oh no no, not like that, you should really discuss this with your parents dear."
"Oh well, I think not having a cutie mark kinda cool!"
I looked back at her, cocking my head. "Pardon?"
"Well stuffy old adults always want to grow up! You're still kinda a kid! I think that's really cool!"
I admit it; I am a bit of a kid at heart. I don't mean I throw a tantrum if I don't get my way, but I just tend ta relate ta kids better than adults for some reason. I never was sure why...
"T-Thanks..."
"I mean who wants to be a grown up? It's a lot more fun being a kid!"
"Hehe...I guess it is, isn't it?"
"And you don't have a Cutie Mark, so you can be anything you want to be, right? That's what everypony says!"
"Yeah, that's right. And I want ta be a popstar, I'm good at it." I parroted like I had been taught since I was small.
"And adults are nothing but a bunch of control freaks!"
"Yeah-wait, what?"
"My parents are always telling me what to do, what to be. Who wants to be a mean old control freak when you can be a nice little filly?"
"Well...I wouldn't say that..."
"They want me to be what they wanted me to be, never what I wanted to be. Well what if I don't want to be 'creativity consultant?' Or to do it there way?"
"...Well...I..." Why was this hard? Why couldn't I think of good answer? I kept trying, but my mind just kept drawing a blank.
"I don't want to be their puppet..."
"Well...I'm sure you don't have ta be..."
"...Then why are you?"
I jumped. "W-What?"
"You said that you were raised to be a singer, so why did you do it?"
I felt my heart skip a beat. "Well...I like it...It's what I'm good at."
"Are you sure?"
"Well...I have fun doing it. I like it...I'm good at it."
"Are you sure? Or do you just think you are?"
"Of course I'm sure! I'm the best! Ponies don't waste bits like the price on my tickets!" I realized I was blowing up at a foal. "Uh, sorry."
"No, you shouldn't be." Eris smiled. "When you're upset, it's because something wrong happened right? Why should you be sorry about being angry then? Why should you hide your anger? Why should you keep from feeling what you naturally feel because others tell you to? Because those with authority tell you to? Because adults tell you to? What good are adults exactly? They argue, tell others what THEY think they should do, always think they're right, never listen to others, never admit they're wrong, always hide away their real feelings, never say what they mean, and lie all the time.
"Who's to say they're always right? Don't ponies say 'change is good?' Doesn't that prove the 'old ways' aren't always best? After all, think about it. Your parents ignored you until they heard you sing. They didn't want to give you attention until you were USEFUL to them! Then they put you on the fast track to super stardom without once asking if it was what YOU wanted! All the dresses and costumes you were made to wear, when you wanted to go around naked instead? Having to struggle to gain control over what you did on stage piece by piece by the hard way? Because the adults only wanted your voice, not you? They paid attention to your voice, not you. What good are adults then? What love has ANY adult actually ever shown you?
"...Not like foals. Isn't it always been foals who have cared about you? That care what you have to say instead of barking orders? You have every RIGHT to be angry, to be who you WANT to be! Not who everypony is saying you SHOULD be! Isn't that right Sapphire?" I was beginning to feel dizzy as I looked into Eris' eyes.
"Who wants to be all old and mean? Why can't we just be kids forever? Wouldn't it be great to be like Pony Pan? Be a little foal forever and ever? No rules, no adults telling you what to do? No silly Cutie Mark telling you what you can and can't be? Wouldn't that be just lovely? So why don't you take my hand, and come off to Never Never Land?"
I looked around at all the adults. None of them caring about Eris being lost and alone. None of them caring for anypony except themselves. Letting a little filly wonder around when some craziness had half of Canterlot shut down.
-.hack//GU Vol. 2 Avatar Battle - Innis-
Who in their right minds would ever want ta be one of them? Who would ever want ta grow up ta be like them?
NOT ME! THAT'S WHO!
I DON'T WANT ANYTHING TA DO WITH ADULTS! EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER!!! Being a foal is the best! Who cares about adults?
I want ta do WHAT I WANT TA DO! ME! ME! ME!
ALL ADULTS DID WAS BULLY AND SCOLD!
I ripped off the clothes I was wearing. I hate them! Why should I wear clothes at all? Because adults want me to? That's not a reason at all! I'm naked and free! Some adults gasp and stare, but I don't care! Big bullies, what I care what anyone thinks of me?!
I kick an adult who gets too close and knock the table behind her over. I'll make whatever mess I want, where I want, how I want!
STUPID ADULTS! LIES! LIES! LIES! LIES! LYING ABOUT ME! LYING ABOUT EVERYTHING!
I kick and scream, I am wild, I am free, I don't need ta listen ta anyone!
Some adults were acting weird, but that's how they always acted. Some were eating their own clothes. Others were now in diapers acting like toddlers. Other giggled ta themselves running into walls and knocking over tables, and putting them back up ta smash them this time. One of the adults was screaming her head off begging the noise ta stop as she covered her ears on stage. Who cared about her? Adults always did things that made no sense.
Guards walked by now looking like clockwork ponies, new toys. Maybe I'd play with them later.
Look at me! Look at me you stupid adults! Stop ignoring me! You're always ignoring me! Look at me! Stop laughing! Stop fighting! Stop shouting! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! Stop it! I'm right here! Why won't any of you ever look at me?!
I HATE ALL OF YOU! Adults! Look at me! You never look at me!
I was like that for hours. Days? I don't know.
I felt myself spinning my wheels. Hating everypony but at the same time wanting their attention. I was miserable, and didn't give a buck that everypony else around me was miserable too.
Then the light of the rainbow washed over me, and it all came back ta me. I stopped caring about me me me and remembered who I was...
Everypony was okay, nopony was hurt, everything was fixed and repaired, and everything was just how it should have been right? We were saved from madness and misery. We had every reason ta celebrate.
Hoity Toity hid in the bathroom. Octavia tried ta rip her own ears off, then ran and locked herself away somewhere. I went ta my guest room and cried ta myself. It's funny, I dreamed of a purple earth pony foal with a raggy doll who sung me this kind little lullaby. That made me feel better.
It helped me pull myself together enough that I could attend the celebration of Equestria being saved from certain disaster because of the Princess' apprentice, a weather captain, a clown, a farmer, a veterinarian, and the maker of one of my best costume sets.
I don't think the tabloids really noticed when I chose ta take a vacation or get professional help. Discord, (capital D, as in a name, a MONSTER), had made everypony in Equestria crazy, miserable, hateful, or all three...lucky me. I didn't bother trying ta figure out what sick games Discord did ta them.
I looked at my blank flank. Eris had said that no Cutie Mark meant I didn't have ta be anything. Ponies said a blank flank could be anything they wanted. But what about a grown up blank flank? What kind of adult didn't have a cutie mark? What kind of mare knew so little about herself that the mirror ta her soul showed nothing?
I suppose I should be happy that the tabloid ponies all had their own problems and weren't in a position ta really takes pictures of anypony.
I talked with Doctor Freudian Excuse (once the poor stallion had been pulled out of his funk) about my problems, and in meantime, Jewel Tide was acting as my stand in.
Jewel Tide? Oh, Jewelry is a nice unicorn, friendly, good voice, good luck, knows her poise and her manners, fun ta be around. And she's my body double and good at it, her special talent is acting. She always wears a hat ta hide her horn, and wears makeup ta make sure her own cutie mark doesn't show. She says we're both from bloodlines of sea ponies who became ponies who walked on land, and that's why our hooves get pruney, but I'm not into all that mythical mumbo jumbo. Well, used ta. Kinda hard not ta get a little rattled when something like Discord showed his ugly head, particularly considering some eggheads are saying he's the Great Destroyer from some old Griffin myths. Still, Eris was flesh and blood there right in front of me, sea ponies? No proof of them. But I respect her beliefs, and she respects mine.
Me and her got along well. She's been alongside me since before news of not havin' a cutie mark went public, and she had to wear a sticker over her own.
Naturally, we had ta get ta know each other pretty well ta start with. Well, more she had ta get ta know me and I wanted ta get ta know her. After all, if I had ta trust her ta be me, I wanted ta know who I was trusting with it. We hit it off and became quick friends...almost sisters...I had lots of siblings, but...when your parents are raising you ta be a foal star and you become one, you don't have a lot of time ta bond with your siblings. Even when they worked with me, most of the time it was business and they went their own ways. Me and Jewelry...we actually got ta spend time together and bond in ways I wish my sibs and I had been able to...
She was also now being me a lot more than she normally was, while I tried ta work out my own problems, and get back that "always-on" confidence I was legendary for, that was part of my public image.
But for Jewel Tide, that meant more work, and lots of it. Singing on stage? Had ta be me, Jewel Tide's got good pipes, but she's an actress, not a professional singer. Any pony can sing, but you gotta be fantastic ta make a living at it. But normally me and her split my other appearances, now, I was busy trying ta get better so I could do the ones I HAD ta do...and Jewelry was left picking up the slack.
Scented candles (blech, never liked the dang things, but thought it was worth a shot), sounds of the ocean, rock gardening, self-confidence mantras, I gave them all a try. But they all kept missing the mark, and I didn't know what the mark was!
I managed ta drag myself on stage a few times for some command performances, my sponsors and my producers were not going to wait forever. But I'd simply take a longer break afterwards. I was able ta put on my pretty face and pretty voice, and my fans cheered; they couldn't tell I was hurting inside, not when the mask was intact. Maybe none of them loved me after all.
They loved Jewel Tide when they saw her, when they thought she was me. So what if she was a good actress instead of a great singer? She could slip into my horseshoes and lip-sync my songs, and no pony would ever ever notice. What was the point of me?
So I retreated more, spending more time at my estate, curled up in bed, ignoring calls that I needed. I let the accountants pay the bills. Nopony would notice.
So yeah, I sat there feelin' sorry myself a good long while you can imagine. Then came the banging on my fancy bedroom door.
"Sapphire! Open this door!" Said my own voice.
Huh? What? Was I dreaming?
I wandered ta my door. I pulled it open with my mouth, and got knocked on the head for my trouble. "OW!" That woke me up. "Jewel Tide?"
"Hello Sapphire." My look alike said, who wasn't wearing a hat. She also didn't look happy. "Get dressed, we need to talk."
That surprised me, it wasn't really like her. She slammed a door into my head and didn't even seem ta notice she'd hit me. Jewelry's a sweet girl, it wasn't like her not ta hurt someone and not care.
In a paranoid moment I made sure her coloring hadn't grayed out, she wasn't discorded. I didn't ask her ta leave the room; we're ponies for crying out loud, we're not THAT radical that we think our bodies are something ta be ashamed of!
She watched me coldly. It was actually scary ta see her like this. Like something had become very wrong with the world.
We went ta my living room that was bigger than most houses, and sat on my giant white couches. On the way we walked past...I'll confess, a room full of comic books, a room full of Leg-goes, and another full of stuffed animals. It was a ...habit of mine. I had been looking for Never Never Land long before I met Eris.
"So...how are things Jewelry?" I asked.
"Oh not so bad Shoreline, I mean, what could possibly be bothering me? I mean, when was the last time we saw each other? When's the last time we talked? Do you remember?"
I gave it a long bit of thought. Thinking about it. When had been the last time we'd actually sat down and talked? "...No, I don't, sorry..."
"I remember. It was the morning before that chaotic tyrant got free."
"Jewelry, did ya notice there's some kinda class touring the grounds today?" I asked, looking out the window. Nothing had seemed out of the ordinary.
"Yes, I think they're from Ponyville, or that's what the guards said."
"Think they'll come ta our concert later? Always a joy ta see a smile on their faces."
Jewel Tide nodded. "Yeah...Hey, can you tell our producers I need a different type of makeup?" she asked, looking back ta her Cutie Mark. "I think I'm allergic to this new kind they've been giving me."
"Sure thing, Jewelry, I'll do it right after the show."
Jewel Tide turned and showed her flank. At first I thought her fur had become red around her Cutie Mark...then I realized it wasn't her fur, it was her SKIN.
"When did you tell the producer?"
... "I...I don't remember."
"When were you going to?"
"I...I forgot..."
"And where have I been all this time?"
I sunk ta my flank. It was like Luna's moon fell from orbit. "You...you were being me..."
She'd told me she was allergic ta the makeup, and not only had I completely forgotten about it...I'd made her be out there wearing it all this time. I hadn't even thought about it...What kind of friend was I?
"And where have you been?"
"H-Here...trying ta get better...Jewelry...I'm sorry...I..."
"Yeah, sorry. You're sorry. I stopped taking the makeup OFF because I'd just have to put it back on again before my skin got time to breathe! I've been working my flank off! I'm supposed to be the one to give YOU breaks, but where's mine?! The two or three times you've been on stage?! I haven't even had time to go to a therapist! And why?! Because I've been trying to give you time to heal! But you can't even find time to tell our producer about my allergy!"
I backed away a little. I...I hadn't even thought about that. I'd never seen Jewel so angry...and I honestly couldn't blame her.
"I tried telling the producer myself, you know what happened?! They didn't BUCKING LISTEN TO ME!"
I could only stare. Jewel Tide never cusses. Ever.
"They're busy trying to heal themselves while still keeping their shows going! I'm just the double! They CAN'T make time for me! But you could've done something!"
I just sat there and let her give me the chewing out I felt I had coming.
"But it isn't just me, Shoreline! Think about your fans! Equestria is HURT, they NEED somepony to make them smile again! And it's what you're GOOD at! You've been so wrapped up in your own problems that you haven't even thought about anypony else's! Or let them in to help YOU!"
We just sat there for a moment, staring at each other. Help...me? After all that, she...she still cared?
"How do you expect to get better doing this all by yourself?" she asked, still seeming angry...but it seemed ta have cooled a little.
"...I'm trying..." was all I could say.
"Yeah, desperate enough to try anything. You hate scented candles, but you've got so many burning right now this place smells like a perfume shop caught fire," she said, floating one of the many candles over ta demonstrate, accidentally getting a big whiff of it herself. "Ugh! Peeyew! What is this candle anyway?!" she asked, putting a hoof tight over her nose.
I took a look at the label and...well, couldn't help blushing. "Uh...Scent of Sulfur..." I must've worn my nose out trying so many different candles ta not smell that.
She just stared in disbelief at me. "This candle is meant for dragons. You didn't even make sure you were getting the right candles for ponies?"
Two things crossed my mind. One, the question of why a little novelty store had scented candles for dragons anyway (would later find out it was stocking up for the Dragon Migration later this year, apparently some places like putting out candles like that ta make dragons more comfortable), and two, the realization that I was not only desperate, I might have been more distracted than I thought. It turned out I'd grabbed candles for Griffins, Deer, and even Minotaurs as well.
Now, don't get me wrong I'm not saying they have bad taste, but a lot of things that smell good ta one species stink ta high heavens ta another. Learned that lesson with my concerts; when we have a Griffin crowd, we tend ta mix something that smelled good ta them into the smoke effects, normally something meat related. It gets Griffins pumped, but tends ta make most ponies feel sick ta their stomachs (there's some herbal stuff I put under my nose ta mask the smell, nose plugs would mess with my singing and would be pretty rude). I shudder ta think what we'll have for my Dragon migration concert (yes, we're going ta have one of those, Dragons like music too).
Point was, not only had I grabbed candles that outright reeked ta a pony's nose, I'd been burnin' 'em without even realizing it. What kinda state had I been in where that was even possible?
"And I checked, you stopped visiting your therapist regularly. Shoreline what is WRONG with you?"
"I'm still seein' 'em."
"Not nearly as often as he suggested you do!"
"How would you even know that?!"
"Actually I was just guessing until three seconds ago. I KNOW that you haven't left the house in way too long, and no doctor has been visiting you."
"You've been stalking me?" I covered my mouth realizing what I just said.
"SHORELINE! Wake up! The entire crew is talking about you being holed up here."
"I just...didn't like how he was digging past what Eris did. He said that Eris stabbed me where it hurt, like it did ta everypony. And that I was burying stuff deep."
"Shoreline, that's his job. He's supposed to help you dig out the roots of how the chaos demon hurt you!"
"Jewelry, do I act like a foal?"
"..." I knew that look.
"I'm sorry."
"Shoreline, it's not that. But...remember after we first met?"
I managed a smile at that. "The other doubles could match my voice, but you were the only one who could match my style."
"You insisted on giving me a tour of the house so I'd know you better. Pony Ranger posters instead of fancy paintings? The latest Magical Filly manega?... I hadn't done any of that in a couple of years. I had fun."
"But-"
"But I did think you were a big filly trying to get her foalhood back after being made to spend it in recording studios and on stage."
"That's what my psychologist said."
"You should listen to him."
"So I'm immature?"
"I never said that. Collecting toys and watching Pony Rangers doesn't make you immature, it makes you a foal at heart. I like that about you Shoreline! You're fun to be around! I'm talking about something else. Shoreline what do you think you're going to do with just hiding yourself more? If those quick fix methods worked, do you think there would BE psychologists? Also, seriously Shoreline, leaving candles burning all over the house while you're in bed? That's dangerous."
"I'm sorry Jewelry. I wasn't thinking."
Awkward silence. My new hot single. Order now and you'll get uncomfortable stillness free!
Nothing but the distant crashing of the ocean waves was heard. Jewel Tide turned off the record player.
"This place is a mess."
"I gave the maid, cook, and gardener some vacation time." I was kinda glad for their sake, considerin' the place had ta smell bad at just about every species on the planet.
"What does your family think about all of this?"
"They're doing fine."
"That isn't what I asked."
"I tell them I just want ta be alone right now. I'm sure I'll...I'll just be back in the saddle after I let myself recharge for a while."
Mom had taken a lot of convincin'. For some reason she'd seemed more worried about me than I'd ever seen her. She kept lookin' at me like she wanted ta say she was sorry but didn't know how...
"Stop it, Shoreline, just stop it. You're hurting yourself, and you're hurting me. I...you think I LIKE being here?"
My heart froze. "What?"
"I'm here for you! Every time I look at you, every time I look in a mirror while dressed as your double, every time I have to pretend to be you and respond to YOUR name..." She shivered. "It's like for a little while, that I cease to exist. That I'm covered up, like a censored picture."
I watched her...saw the pain on her face. And for the first time since Day of Chaos, I stopped caring about how hurt I was.
"...Jewelry, let's not make this about me for a moment and make it about you."
She gave a gasp. "Shoreline?"
"You're hurtin' too. I want ta help if I can."
"You don't have to force myself on you. You're not a doctor."
"Now whose buryin' herself?"
"Heh...alright Shoreline."
"Jewelry, seriously, you don't need ta tell me, but what did Eris DO ta you?"
"...He made me you."
"What?" I whispered.
She shuddered a bit more. "He made me a copy of you. A real copy. I don't know if I had my Cutie Mark, I just never looked. MY HORN WAS GONE! It was like I couldn't acknowledge the possibility I could have one at all. Just like I couldn't acknowledge my name wasn't Sapphire Shores. I...I couldn't think my name! I had all my memories, I remembered my foalhood, I remembered being hired to be your double. But MY NAME was rubbed out! I HAD TO introduce myself as Sapphire Shores to anypony I talked to! Not that there were many ponies to talk to as the world kept getting crazier and crazier! I went to MY room, and found my face taken out of the pictures, with the rest of me still there, my journal was still where it was supposed to be, but my name was rubbed out with everything else still there!" She almost cried. "When the rainbow fixed everything, I couldn't stand wearing a hat. But I had to anyway! Unlike you, I don't get to decide when my vacation time is!"
I didn't know how ta respond for a second. I didn't know what ta say...so I just hugged her. Yeah yeah, call me sappy, but Jewelry was my best friend...one of the few friends I knew without a shadow of a doubt that I had.
She hugged me back. And it was like a dam burst.
"Jewelry I'm sorry! I'm just so sorry. I'm so so sorry! It's just, when I hit it big, I felt so cut off from my brothers and sisters, I didn't have time for them, so I always thought you and me? We could be sisters a little. I know that's selfish but that's how I saw us! I'm ramblin', I know! But Jewelry! Please! If I had known, I promise I'd have done something different! I promise! I know that doesn't change anything but I'm so so sorry!"
We were silent for a few minutes. I think I'd started crying and maybe she did too.
"It's okay Shoreline," she said, like she was worried I needed permission, "You're not being foalish, adults cry too."
"I know. My dad, when the pegasi got him down from the pole he was clutching ta for dear life, he was sobbing...the monster reversed gravity on him...dad says Eris said 'I'll figure out how ta have fun with you later, just remember, don't look up! Or is that down? Bye!' Mom says he can't bear ta look at the sky right now."
"Why didn't you ask what that chaos demon did to me before?"
"I thought it would have been rude to make you remember something that horrible, but then I saw how much it was hurting you and thought maybe it'd help. Not sure if it was the right thing to do... You said it yourself, I'm not doctor."
"No...you're a singer, who's made more ponies happy than you can guess at."
"The mess of make-up and stage lights and costumes made them happy, if they recorded my voice and you lip-sync..."
"You silly filly!" Jewel Tide snapped, sad and agitated and warm all at the same time. "Don't you get it? That's the point! Ponies sing from the heart. Ponies connected at the heart can sing together, even if they can't hear each other's words or are worlds apart. When you sing, what you're singing IS your soul, your heart out among them. Your singing is you showing your heart, your singing IS your cutie mark. So why do you THINK ponies love your singing so much? The costumes? The dancing? It's you. YOUR voice, not mine, your heart, your soul. I spent an entire summer trying to get a singing cutie mark, like my mother had. Then I went to a play, I memorized all the lines and body language from that first time. I repeated the entire play from memory for my family and friends, they loved it, and I loved that I was able to make mom smile. That's when my cutie mark came to me. Didn't you realize all those ponies LOVE your music?"
"Duh! Of course they do! Ticket sales don't lie!"
"That's not what I mean Shoreline. Did you ever stop during a show, and see them? Them all cheering for you."
"Lots of times."
"Did you ever, stop to think why? What kept bring them back? Again and again? Why have you been popular ever since you were foal? Shoreline, how many stars have you seen come and go? How many were just lip-syncing mouthpieces? How many had -gimmicks- to try and hide their average singing? How many were puppets who just did what the producers and crew told them to?"
Told them to... That's right. I always managed my own costumes, my own choreography, I wrote my own songs. I decided where my bits went. I CHOSE ta help foals who fate wasn't kind ta a day of happiness and a chance at making something of themselves. Heck, it was my idea ta get Rarity ta be my designer that time, not Stage Light's. I never once consulted 'em. Did that a good bit ta be honest...
How stupid could I be ta fall for Eris' bait and switch? Sure, I love attention, it's a thrill, I love it when I know I'm thought about and talked about with other ponies. Annoying stalking photographers. Mobbing strangers. Fictional tabloid stories. They were signs that I was somepony! That my music reached more ponies than I could count! That I brightened their day just a tiny bit, thanks ta me! That I could bring some joy into their lives when they needed me! And I loved all of it! And...and if I had it over again?
I'd still choose ta sing. I'd still choose the spotlight, the intrusive paparazzi, the frustrating nights when I couldn't come up with a new single, the charity concerts scheduled ten minutes before the meeting I was at ended (that was a good thing), the letters from stallions wanting me ta be the mother of their foals, the nights playing Harmony: The Gathering with Jewel Tide, the stage crew and back-up dancers, after a good practice performance, the looks on my parents faces as I gave them that new house as a Mother's Day gift. The little orphans giving a big grin when I take the stage before their big bright eyes.
If I had it over again, I'd still choose this life. This wasn't the me my folks wanted me ta be, this was me.
Ugh. My flanks were tingling, was Jewel Tide's rash catching?
Jewelry looked at my butt. She gasped, her eyes wide. "Shoreline...you might want to take a look on your flanks." The rash must be worse than I thought, I looked.
Oh. My. Cel-est-ia.
Light blue clam shell with a tiny wave under it, dark blue eight sided jewel in the center. It was mine. And I could swear I had seen it somewhere before, like in a dream, where wishes always came true and everypony were friends.
"Shoreline...you did it...it's yours...you..."
I hugged her tight and LAUGHED. "OH JEWELRY! I love the smiles on the ponies faces, and Celestia knows, Equestria NEEDED smiles, and bad! I've been givin' 'em smiles my entire life, why should I let 'em down when they need me the most? I've been so busy worrying about myself, I'd forgotten what made me happiest and what would help me and everypony else more than anything. Doing what I do best and being seeensational! Eris might be a lawn ornament again, but until everypony is their happy smiling selves again, he still has the last laugh. And I don't know about you, but I think that maniac has laughed enough, it's our turn ta laugh again!"
Jewel Tide kissed me on the cheek. "...Welcome back Shoreline."
A long overdue cutie mark (buck those who say 'they come when they come'), doesn't cure a hurt heart, but it did help me get my head back on straight. I went back ta therapy, and I STAYED on it this time, until the doc said I was ready again. But I also made sure ta get back ta my public appearances so Jewelry had her chance ta see her own doctors, and made darn sure ta trot up ta the producers and tell 'em Jewelry needed different make up.
Did I get rid of the filly stuff? Hehe, no way. There ain't anything wrong with being a foal at heart, so long as you remember ta be a grown up in mind. That's part of who I am too.
I decided ta check up on some ponies who were...well, not friends...oh what the hay; I cared about 'em, we get along, so they're my friends. Hoity Toity was recovering, but had ta spend a bit of time in the hospital, turned out banging your head against the wall enough times can give even a hard headed (I mean that literally) pony a concussion. I visited him and told him if he wanted ta talk, I was all ears. Think that's the first time that stallion has had somepony reach out ta him like that. Not a lot of ponies think critics have feelings.
I checked on Octavia and surprise surprise, she'd gotten the same idea as I'd had. Realized how her music made ponies feel, that it could help 'em heal. Said the music of healing hearts was the best she'd ever played. And sweetie, I think I agree with her. Hope between me and her, we can put a lot of smiles back on Equestrian faces.
I checked up on Miss Rarity Belle. Couldn't convince her me and Blueblood was just tabloids spiel, but nopony's perfect. Girl was still a bowl full of jelly around me, but she seemed ta have gotten a fancy smancy couch for whenever she fainted. Go figure. Girl was doing a lot better than I thought she'd be (Ponyville had gotten hit the hardest by old Eris). I told her she should get professional help all the same, but she told me she had her own little therapy session going on already.
Her little sister was hanging around too, sweet girl. Little filly fainted, woke up, asked me questions spitfire for a minute and a half straight, then fainted again. Rarity promised ta tell her little sister that she hadn't dreamed it. I doubt her school friends will believe 'er though. Heh. I suggested Miss Rarity get Sweetie a little couch of her own too ta faint, then she told me it wasn't a couch, it was a chaise longue, who knew?
My mom and dad were happy ta see me again. Dad was doin' a lot better now, he could at least look at the sky now. Mom?...Let's just say I wasn't the only one who Eris used my foal stardom as a torture tool against. Mom apologized over and over again for not realizing how hard it must've been on me, but I forgave her. After all, you don't get your Cutie Mark for something you hate.
My siblings? If I went through them all, we'd be here all day, but just know I checked in on all of 'em and help 'em if I need ta.
My fans were happy ta have me singing again, that was for sure. Oh? My cutie mark? The designers threw a fit over have ta remake the t-shirts and dolls, until I pointed out the bundle they could make on cutie mark stickers and washable tattoos, and NEW merchandise, and jewelry based on my cutie mark. I turned me finally getting my mark into a message of hope, that if an adult Blank Flank could get a Cutie Mark, nothing was impossible. Not only did I believe it, but it's what Equestria needed ta hear at the time. They needed hope.
I also released a new surprise song for my relief tour across Equestria (I insisted it be a free one. Producers went with it for PR, but eh, just doing their jobs). And I think it's what everypony needed ta hear ta set them free. I knew it did me! Jewel Tide was in the audience, front row seat, with her cutie mark and horn showing, and wearing a different mane style than mine, ponies brushed her off as a cosplayer, go figure. One of my back up dancers even invented a new step called the Navigator when I was in Ponyville as part of one of the local celebrations. Wish I could figure out which one, so I could give'em huge bonus!
Oh! My song? Oh, it went a little something like this!
"Come gather under the sun
Learn to believe again, and
Enjoy a good long run!
Just reach out and help a friend!
Sit back and let me reach out to you!
Listen to my words, I know they're trrrruuuue!
This isn't just make believe!
This is hope for another day!
My words aren't here to deceive!
They're here to show you the way!
They're here to reach out to all of you!
Listen to my words, you know they're true!
I'm not a naive foal
Feelin' the way I do.
Making you smile is my role
That's why I'm saying to you;
Ya can see the silver linin's
So long as you keep on tryin'!
So come on everypony, try
To hope for brighter tomorrows!
Broken wings can mend and fly!
So how about we all follow?!
Just take the hoof reached right out to you
And fly again with your friends true blue!
So just let your friends reach out to you!
Listen to their words; you know they're true-ue-ue!"