There's a Changeling On My Couch, and Other "Tails" From the Far North

by Super Trampoline


Bonus Chapter: April 1st, Pinkie Pie Style!

Bonus Chapter: April 1st, Pinkie Pie Style

Flashpan awoke with a yawn and a sigh. Actually, it was the fifth time he had woken up that morning, but he figured he should only count actual attempts at getting out of bed, of which this was his first for the day. He looked over at the wall clock. “10:47” it read. “I’ve got to stop sleeping in,” he not-very-convincedly told himself. He meandered over to the restroom to do what one does there, then after washing his front hooves, glanced in his dresser mirror to see how bad his bed head was.
“AAAAAUGHHH!!!” He jumped a good three hooves into the air in surprise. There in the mirror was not his own hoofsome  face, but that of a very bubbly pink mare smiling back at him.
“Who are you and what are you doing in m-m-my mirror?!?!” He stammered as he awkwardly back pedaled a Celest* or two back away from the seemingly possessed mirror.
“You mean you don’t know who I am?” she asked incredulously as she scrunched down then sprung out of the mirror onto the floor in front of it. “I’m Pinkie Pie! You know, ‘Element of Laughter’, thrower of parties, friend to Cthulhu and Deadpool. You don’t know me?” At this she deflated a tiny bit, saddened by the fact that somepony might not have been graced by her cheerful antics.
Flashpan was flabbergasted. “Uh, I’ve heard of you I think. You seem as every bit as …” –He tried to think of a nice way to say “Completely Insane”– “Um, out there as I’ve heard you described. It’s a… um … pleasure to meet you Miss Pie.”
She trotted up to the startled stallion and shook his hoof vigorously. “Likewise, Flashpan Alley!”
His jaw dropped. “H-How do you know my name?” he asked.
“Oh, I know everypony,” she replied nonchalantly. “Anyway, I just wanted to say hi. HI!”
“Um, ok, uh, hi? But how did you… just… come through my mirror?” he asked, not entirely sure he wanted to know the answer.
“Oh, you mean the fourth wall? I break it all the time. It’s my special talent! See?” She pointed to her flank, which had… balloons on it?
“Uh Pinkie, what is the fourth wall, and what does it have to do with balloons?”
“Oo Oo Oo!” she shouted. “Story time! Sit down on that couch in the yonder next room, and I’ll bake you a cake while I tell you alllll about the fourth wall!”

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Forty five minutes and one delicious cake later, she finished. “And that’s how Twilight became the fresh princess of Ponyville! Maybe some other time I’ll tell you about how I got my cutie mark!”
Flashpan sat there wordlessly munching on (very yummy) cake. There really was nothing one could say after witnessing that whirlwind standup routine he beheld before him.
So Pinkie spoke for him. “Well, I guess that was all I really came here for, to buck the laws of physics and magic and say hi. I’ll be going. See you later alligator!” She started to head towards the mirror, but then turned around as if remembering something.
“Oh by the way, I miiiiiight have peaked ahead a few chapters, and while I Pinkie Promised her not to –OOPS! IT! I MEAN GENDER-NEUTRAL IT!... anyway I Pinky promised to an androgynous friend –I mean enemy –I mean pony ill-defined sentient creature– not to give away any of the details (As my friend’s wife would say, ‘Spoilers!’) surrounding it, but suffice it to say that you should buy a scarf for your marefr– I MEAN marvelous acquaintance. Yeah. Go buy a scarf and thank me later. Bye!” The pink fluffy eldritch abomination hopped onto the stool in front of his dresser, then dove back into the mirror from which it came.
        “Wait!” Flashpan pleaded. “I have so many questions to ask you!” But Pinkie Pie just smiled, turned and waved, then bounced out the virtual bedroom door and out of virtual sight. But there in the mirror, beyond the door to his virtual living room, Flash definitely thought he saw a… whatever that thing was called he read about. “Weird,” he thought. “But in the context of the last fifty minutes… not that weird.” His mirror then shimmered an alien baby blue color, and then… was normal? Huh.

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        “GAH!” Flashpan awoke and rose from his bed in a start. “No more chocolate milk and cotton candy right before sleepies!”