Forty-two
Act 2
20 Hours Later
Fancy Pants
A Gate opens in the Hero of Hope’s room, depositing him roughly onto the floor. He rubs his head, and looks up to see his sprite guide hovering before him.
FANCY PANTS: what happened? why’d that gate take me back here?
HEAVYSPARTANGUY: This was not gate.
HEAVYSPARTANGUY: What you used was Return Node.
HEAVYSPARTANGUY: They return you here.
FANCY PANTS: huh. well, based on the name, i guess that’s pretty obvious.
FANCY PANTS: these could be handy though.
FANCY PANTS: besides… it’s time for me to start alchemizing.
FANCY PANTS: i’ve already done a bunch of sidequests, and relieved these salamanders of all this grist they don’t need.
FANCY PANTS: besides, this piece of crap gun isn’t cutting it anymore.
Fancy Pants moves over to the Alchemiter, then realizes he’ll need help operating it first. He moves over to his computer.
gamingAvarice began chatting with aboriginalAlmanac at 1:30 P.M.
GA: hey, cheerilee!
GA: how are you holding up?
AA: I’m holding up, I can say that much.
AA: My land seems to be fundamentally different from the others in certain ways.
AA: These frogs apparently serve a much greater purpose. They are seen as almost sacred to the residents of the land.
AA: While, from what I can gather, frogs are seen as a taboo on Derse. They revile the image of the creatures.
AA: It’s all very curious.
AA: But what, exactly, their purpose is, I couldn’t guess. They seem just like any other frogs to me.
GA: man, that IS weird…
GA: there’s nothing like that here on lofas.
GA: just a lot of forts with salamanders living in them. some try to build cities and kingdoms, some are in turf wars with each other.
GA: some just squat there.
GA: but that gets me back to what i wanted to ask you about. i got a bunch of grist from these sidequests. you up for some alchemizing?
AA: Sure! I could use to upgrade my own arsenal, but I’ll need to wait for Derpy to do that.
AA: At least I can get some ideas from what you make.
GA: alright! i was thinking we make some new guns first.
Fancy Pants takes his PERFECTLY GENERIC RIFLE, and begins searching for ways to create new guns. Finally, he settles on two other titles: FALLOUT: NEW PEGASUS and HALO 3. He runs both through the alchemizing process, and acquires the PLASMA RIFLE and BATTLE RIFLE. The plasma rifle requires a bit of uranium, which he was lucky enough to obtain for a particularly challenging side quest. The battle rifle just costs some common materials, and is pretty much a straight upgrade from the perfectly generic rifle.
He doesn’t think that’s quite enough yet though, and decides to try for something a bit more abstract. He obtains the codes for PORTAL and HALF-LIFE 2. As expected, these create the PORTAL GUN and GRAVITY GUN, respectively. These also have a high cost in rare grist, especially the portal gun, which requires several units of garnet and diamond, but once again, he has ample supply, and makes both.
With these new guns, though, Fancy Pants feels that he needs a better system for operating them. The robo-gloves he made before are cheap and not the most responsive. He obtains the code for them, then grabs a code for LEAGUE OF LEGENDS. These create a much more responsive pair of VI GLOVES; but they’re a bit big. Another run through with a MINI-MUSHROOM fixes that problem. He slips them on and does some highly acrobatic maneuvers with the portal and gravity guns. His landing is a bit rough though.
“Oh yeah… Need the long fall boots. I never wear shoes, but I think sis has some…”
He messages Cheerilee to let her know where he is going, and makes his way out of his room and through his rather expansive home. It’s not quite MANSION-GRADE, but it’s still pretty big when compared to most houses. He makes his way to his sister’s room, and takes a breath in preparation before entering.
FLEUR: Fancy Pants! Oh, thank Celestia that was you up there. I thought another imp got in.
FANCY PANTS: some imps got in?
FLEUR: Yeah. The defenses you put up held most of them off, but they aren’t good enough to keep them all out.
FANCY PANTS: huh… well, we’ve got a lot better resources now. i’ll set up some more turrets all over the house, and some heavier-duty shields. that should keep them out.
FLEUR: Alright. Will they be reloaded the same way?
FANCY PANTS: yeah. just whack ‘em with a wrench every so often, and they should work just fine.
FLEUR: Okay… Thank you again for doing this for me, brother.
FANCY PANTS: no problem. and as soon as it looks like the coast is clear, i’ll come back for you, and we’ll both get where we’re going.
FLEUR: Alright. Is there anything I can do to move things along? It gets dull here sometimes, and… Well, I sort of feel like I’m not doing much to help.
FANCY PANTS: i see what you mean…
FANCY PANTS: well, first, can i borrow a pair of boots? i need to make some to use some of my equipment right.
FANCY PANTS: and i’ll see what i can do to help you take a more active role. maybe i can whip up a manual controller for the turrets.
FLEUR: That might help.
FLEUR: Here, take these boots. Good luck!
Fancy Pants nods, pleasantly surprised by how the conversation went. He supposes that his sister is shaken by events, and isn’t feeling well enough to blame him for everything.
He returns to his room, and first makes his LONG FALL BOOTS. He then begins experimenting with several games, and comes up with several types of AUTOTURRETS originating from various games. An array of shielding options shortly follows.
Fancy Pants now decides it’s time to make fun stuff. He retrieves his phone, thinking of how he could make a cooler and more convenient chat device. Eventually, his eyes settle on another game, PONYBALL Z, and his reading MONOCLE. The combination of these three items yields the SCOUTER. Fancy Pants laughs in victory and slips the item over his left eye immediately.
He thinks for a moment. What else can he make? He hasn’t needed armor yet, and he’s already made plenty of weapons. Healing options are plentiful enough already.
An idea pops into his head, and his eyes widen. He knows what he must do. He grabs the copies of Half-Life 2 and Halo 3 again, with the speed and precision of a pony with one sole purpose in mind, and the dreams of a world on his back. He runs the two codes through, and gazes at the Alchemiter impatiently. At last, the machine works its magic, depositing the resulting item.
Tears of joy for in the corners of his eyes. By Skaia’s light, by Celestia’s sun, he’s done it. The spiritual holy grail of gaming. HALF-LIFE 3. As he cradles the disc in his hooves, he knows that it is every bit as beautiful as he could have imagined. He knows, without a shadow of a doubt, that it was worth the weight.
Too bad he’s pretty much the only one who’s ever going to be able to play it, because almost everyone else in Equestria is dead. He shrugs, wipes the tears from his eyes, and places the disc lovingly in his CD case for safekeeping. He will have time for it later. For now, though he never thought he’d say it, there is a bigger game than Half-Life 3 to be concerned with.
AA: Hee hee, you seem to be having fun.
GA: you have no idea.
GA: i could make a fortune back home with this game.
GA: well… a second fortune.
GA: but, i mean, what would i even use it for when the only thing i did with the one i HAD was play video games?
AA: I don’t know. Donate it?
GA: yeah, probably.
GA: use half-life 3 for the greater good of the world. the way it was meant to be used.
GA: it’s what the people who made the series would have wanted.
AA: Hee hee~
AA: Anyway, I will return to you later. I want to check up on Quick Fix.
GA: heh heh. alright.
GA: oh, wait! there was something i wanted to tell you.
GA: can you keep a secret? at least for now.
AA: Certainly. What is it?
GA: well… remember that white stallion we met in the temple?
AA: Oh, yes!
AA: Speaking of which, I should check back on the temple soon.
GA: right. well, this isn’t about the temple, it’s about the stallion.
GA: i think he’s the final boss.
AA: Oh my. Are you sure?
GA: no, not at all. i could definitely be wrong.
GA: that’s why you shouldn’t say anything, because until i’m certain, we have to keep pursuing the main quest as it’s given.
GA: but sometimes in games, a person shows up in the beginning, all mysterious, and pretends to help you.
GA: you might see him once or twice more between that time and the end of the game, but mostly he’ll stay out of the way.
GA: but then, when you get to the ‘final boss’, he shows up, and reveals that HE’S the real final boss, and has been pulling the strings all along.
AA: Ah, yes. I’ve encountered that trope in a few books, as well.
AA: So you think that’s what is happening here?
GA: i think it’s possible. that’s all i can say for certain.
AA: I see. Well, thank you for telling me. I will keep that in mind, but keep it to myself.
GA: alright. thanks, cheerilee.
GA: good luck out there.
AA: You too, my friend.
gamingAvarice ceased chatting with aboriginalAlmanac at 1:56 P.M.
Doc
The young Hero of Time slides across the open ground, twisting his head to bring his REVENGE OF PHILLIP screwdriver into the side of another monster, slaying it. He feels himself take a hit from behind, but thanks to the shielding he had improvised from the technology in his basement, the damage was minimized. He swings back around, scoring a second kill.
He glances over his shoulder, and sees a mighty ogre behind him. He smiles, and retrieves a pair of items from his inventory- the SONIC PERCISION TIME-JUMP devices- and disappears in a flash of blue light. He reappears in the same moment behind the ogre’s head, and drives his screwdriver straight through. Before the monster can react, he jumps again, this time appearing near its feet to stab it in the ankle and unbalance it. One final jump to stab it straight through the back sends the ogre exploding into a heap of grist, which Doc collects in satisfaction.
He looks around the dark fields of Losab, the rain bouncing off of his jacket, equipped out of necessity. The land was divided into sections, each of which was connected to one or more other sections. An imbalance of weight on any section would cause it to sink into the ground, and would send others rising higher. Doc had already learned that this could cause dramatic destructive effects on the land and its inhabitants, but he is sure that he would need to manipulate the nature of this land to complete his personal section of the quest. He can’t help but wonder how the Denizen still resides in the center of such an unstable planet, but he assumes that this is something else that will come with time. And time is something that this young stallion has no shortage of.
Doc spies a house a short walk away, and makes his way to it, hoping to get out of the rain. He expects to meet more of the land’s residents, but when he reaches the building, it seems to be abandoned. It looks as though it once served as a farmhouse, but hasn’t been occupied in some time. The walls and roof alike have various holes rotted through, and the wood of the remaining walls and ceiling seem rotten as well. However, it doesn’t look like it’s on the verge of caving in just yet, and Doc decides that it will make an acceptable shelter.
He finds a relatively dry spot, and retrieves his computing device: a sleek machine that takes up the length of his forearm, with a touch screen large enough to complete Sgraze operations for Derpy on the go. A second screen to the side is used for chat. He accesses this one.
agelessTraveler began chatting with cross-eyedAngel at 1:42 P.M.
AT: Hello, my dear! How are you faring on your quest?
CA: hi doc! <3
CA: it’s going pretty good!
CA: i’ve already earned a lot of grist.
CA: and something called boondollars. i think the lizard-people that live on our planets use those as money.
AT: Seems that way. I’ve earned a fair number of boondollars, myself.
CA: sweet!
CA: so, did you need to talk to me about something, or…?
AT: Oh, not really. I just thought I’d check up on you, see how you are doing.
CA: ah, alright! that’s nice of you!
CA: well, i’ve done… three quests now, i think. the first one was easy, it was just a delivery to another town. same job i always do. :P
CA: the other two had me get a treasure and fight stronger monsters. those were a bit tough, but it was worth it.
AT: Indeed. I’ve completed a few myself, and my grist and boondollar stores, as well as my level, have benefited from it.
CA: yeah!
CA: so, you’ve mostly been doing quests and stuff, too?
AT: That, and experimenting with the time-manipulation devices I’ve been given.
AT: I imagine that it’s my duty to discover their potential, as the resident who gave me the base item for them as a reward for my first quest referred to me as the ‘Hero of Time’.
CA: really? :o
AT: Really really.
AT: Though I’ve heard our whole group referred to as ‘heroes’, so I’m certain that we all have some element assigned to us.
CA: yeah, that makes sense…
CA: i haven’t heard what mine is yet though. :/
AT: Doesn’t seem as though anyone has. I spoke to Fancy Pants a short time ago, and he was just as much in the dark.
AT: I’m certain it will become clear with time, though.
CA: yeah…
CA: speaking of time, you said you’ve been experimenting with your time travel thingies?
CA: learn anything cool?
AT: Oh! Er… are you sure?
AT: I mean, I would love to talk about it, but I don’t want to bore you…
CA: that’s okay!
CA: i may not TOTALLY understand time travel stuff, but i think you’re pretty good at explaining it.
AT: Oh, well, I can’t say no to that, can I?
AT: You’re going to make me blush…
AT: Anyway, they don’t work exactly as I thought they would.
AT: I thought time was a strict progression of events. I thought that if you travel back in time, then you were always supposed to. That everything, even time travel, was pre-destined.
AT: And sometimes, these devices do act like that. But sometimes they don’t.
AT: For instance, a little while ago, a version of myself from the future came back to talk to me.
AT: He advised me against taking a certain action that I planned on taking. He said that it would create a ‘doomed timeline’, and that by avoiding that action, I could prevent it.
AT: I did, and he was satisfied. But he said that he would have to die. He said that doomed timeline clones such as he were always destined to die, and that only the ‘alpha’ me could survive.
AT: So he gave me all his grist and boondollars, and left. I have not seen him since.
AT: It was quite unsettling…
AT: So time seems to maintain some linearity when these devices are in use, but some events can be changed.
AT: I don’t know what to picture time as now. It’s not a straight line of course, and it’s not even a line that doubles back on itself.
AT: Right now, in my mind, it just looks like a big mess. A big ball of wibbly wobbly, timey wimey stuff.
AT: Suddenly, that phrase actually makes sense. My… My mentor, used to use that phrase pretty frequently.
CA: huh… that’s all really weird!
CA: but, wait, why did you hesitate when you mentioned your mentor?
AT: It’s… it’s a long story. Impossibly long.
AT: That’s not to say I won’t tell you. I will.
AT: But I think I need a bit more time to process it myself, and to decide how exactly to tell the story.
CA: ah, i see.
CA: well, that’s okay! you can tell me whenever you’re ready. i can wait.
AT: Thank you, my dear.
AT: Also, I’ve been working on your house in my down time. We are close to reaching the Second Gate. I will let you know when we secure it.
CA: alright! thanks doc!
CA: oh, i think something’s happening. i’ll talk to you later!
AT: Alright, good luck!
agelessTraveler ceased chatting with cross-eyedAngel at 2:03 P.M.