Absence of Laughter
Luna's routine rarely wavered or changed in any way. In some instances, it was comforting and even relaxing to a point. In others, it was monotonous and completely mindless. Every night it seemed like it was the same noble ponies asking the same idiotic questions as the previous night. And then there were the decisions that Luna actually enjoyed helping with.
The decision in question this night had to do with whether or not to expand Equestria's military. Luna often handled Equestria's military matters, simply because Celestia no longer had the stomach for them.
I guess a millennium ruling alone would do that to a pony, Luna thought to her self.
She could see the upsides to the proposition. It would create more jobs for ponies and house them, to an extent. They could be used as peace-keeping forces, should the need arise (Luna highly doubted that, considering Equestria was currently going through it's longest reign of uninterrupted peace since it was founded. But it never hurt to be too careful).
The downside, on the other hand, was that other nations could view this as an attempt to consolidate forces for a war. Which no one wanted. And so, Luna thought. And Thought. And, for good measure, Thought some more, which made the petitioner in front of her, one Captain Stolid Aegis, a little bit impatient.
Finally, Luna spoke, "Captain, I have an idea."
"I'm listening, ma'am," Aegis said.
"I believe that we would be able to create at least three new regimens, which is what you were initially looking for, correct?" Luna said.
"I was looking for at least three, ma'am," the captain said, "But I would have preferred six, to supplement the Guard we have looking for the Changelings."
"My idea is this," Luna said, "We create the regimens with the premise that they will simply be for show, similar to the Wonderbolts. We rotate the the ponies who make up these ranks so they can get the field experience needed to defend the country."
Aegis thought for a moment about the idea, then asked, "What would this group of show ponies have to do?"
"The usual basic training for all guards," Luna said, "At least at first. Then we would have them train in combat magics for unicorns, archery and hoof to hoof combat for all races of ponies. It will all be under the guise of competition. We will also invite the other races to compete in the events."
"Hmm...." Aegis said softly, "That would work. It would prevent most of the backlash from increasing the military and it would give us an edge should the worst come to pass. I agree, Princess."
"Good!" Luna said clapping her hooves together, "I shall make arrangements with my sister on the morrow!"
"Excellent, ma'am," Captain Aegis said excitedly, "I'll leave you to the rest of your duties."
Luna nodded and watched as Stolid Aegis left the room. She asked her guard, "Are there any more petitioners?"
"No, ma'am," was the reply.
"Then I am going to dreamwalk," Luna said, "Guards, attend to me."
`~`~`~`~`~`~
'Once more unto the breach', Luna thought to herself as she entered the dream world again.
It turned out that there were a large number of nightmares tonight, but they were relatively simple things to deal with. Things such as an unbidden thought that a special somepony was being a little more than promiscuous or that a vicious clown was advancing upon a child (Luna never could fathom exactly why clowns were scary).
However, the dream she had entered just a short while ago was quite possibly the most incredibly insane dream she had ever entered. And Luna would know insane because she had once attempted to help King Sombra before the fall of the Crystal Empire.
The dream was split into two halves, straight down the middle. On Luna's left was something similar to what Discord had turned Ponyville into during his break out a year prior, only with a lot more pink. On her right however was something that Luna was sure not even Nightmare Moon had been capable of. Oh, it was still Ponyville. Just barely. More specifically, though, both halves of the dream were centered on Sugarcube Corner, with the left begin almost exactly as it was in the waking world. The right was dark, almost impossibly so.
Luna walked forward until she saw a table that was split in half along the same line the dream was with Pinkie Pie speaking animatedly to... Pinkie Pie? With a bewildered expression, Luna sat down at the table where a pink blur promptly set up a place for her, a cupcake and a cup of hot tea waiting after the wind from Pinkie's movements stopped. Both Pinkie's looked at Luna, with the dark Pinkie speaking first.
"First things first, Luna," the dark Pinkie said, "The name's Pinkamena. Pretty sure you already know Pinkie."
"Yes," Luna said, still a little shocked, "May I ask what in the name of my sister's plot is going on here?"
"Okie Doki Loki!" the light Pinkie said happily, "this is my dream, but you already know that cause you're the princess. But more specifically, Pinkamena and I are two halves of the same pony and whenever I dream they're always lucid dreams and Pinkamena and I always talk about stuff all the time and-"
Pinkie was silenced by Pinkamena's hoof while the latter said, "I think she gets the point, airhead, might want to take a breath every now and then."
"So, what is this about?" Luna asked, "Not a... property dispute(3) I hope?"
"What?" Pinkamena asked, "Who the hell do you think we are? Xehanort and Terra? No, this isn't a property dispute!"
"Nopey nope!" Pinkie said, her attitude still chipper, "Pinkie's had a few things on her chest that she's needed to talk about for a while now, but otherwise Pinkamena and I are all hunky dori!!"
"I wouldn't put it quite like that..." Pinkamena said with a groan, "But little miss sunshine and lollipops over there has the gist of things."
"Well, I am all ears, as the saying goes," Luna said, "I will listen to what you both have to say."
"Ugh... Where to start?" Pinkamena said rhetorically.
"Well that's easy! Start at the beginning!" Pinkie said happily.
"Thanks a lot, Captain Obvious," Pinkamena snapped, "You wanna cookie or are you gonna let me start?"
"BOTH!!" Pinkie roared and rushed off to grab one of the giant cookies floating by in her half of the dreamscape. Both Luna and Pinkamena looked exasperated, but the latter started speaking on anyway.
"It actually started on Pinkie's birthday," Pinkamena said, "Her problems, I mean. Twilight and the others were planning a surprise party for her, but she thought that they were purposefully avoiding her and trying to abandon her."
"I remember reading that report," Luna said, "I thought that you all had swept everything under the rug, as the saying goes?"
"Yeah... could you stop saying, 'as the saying goes'?" Pinkamena asked, "It's REALLY fucking annoying."
"Such language should not be used by ladies!!" Pinkie shouted as she floated by on her giant cookie and chasing down a massive glass of what looked like liquefied omelet.
"I'LL SHOW YOU WHAT SHOULDN'T BE USED BY FILLIES YOU SUGAR CRAZED PSYCHOPATH!!" Pinkamena bellowed with a raised forehoof.
"I'll stop saying that as long as you get back on subject... Pinkamena," Luna said.
"Yeah, yeah, keep your socks on, Princess," Pinkamena said, "Where was I? Oh yeah. Her birthday. Yeah, Twilight and the others apologized about avoiding her all the time, but Pinkie never really got over that feeling of abandonment. Hell, that's where I first manifested, if you will. Luckily for everypony involved Pinkie hasn't gotten worse, but this split personality bullshit is ridiculous!!"
"I agree, however," Luna said, "There is something that the zebrican tribes believe in called a tulpa(1). A second, fully functioning soul living in a body that was created by the original. I believe that this is the situation that Pinkie has found herself in."
"If that's so, then why am I like this?" Pinkamena asked, gesturing to her dark half of the world and her somber and straight haired appearance.
"I believe that Pinkie created you to help her deal with any dark or upsetting moments in her life," Luna guessed as said pink party pony floated by... on Kossalagoopagoop(2) yelling "Go, Koosy! Faster!!"
"I didn't ask for this existence, damn it!" Pinkamena yelled in a pained voice, "It isn't fair!!"
"Of course it isn't fair, Pinkamena," Pinkie said as she suddenly appeared next to her distraught other half, "I mean, me not being able to handle the stress of what I thought was my friends abandoning us and everything that happened after? And forcing that all into you? Anypony would be overwhelmed by that sadness."
"I-it hurts so much sometimes..." Pinkamena said, her voice cracking and tears starting to form, "The nightmares I have because of all that pain..."
Pinkie hugged her other half and said, "I'm always here for you, Pinkamena. And I promise that I won't put anymore bad things into you. Only good things and cupycakes from now on!!"
Luna blinked in surprise. She gathered her thoughts and said to both Pinkamena Diane Pie's, "The bad things in life don't necessary overshadow the good. Likewise, the good does not necessarily blot out the bad. If you two were to handle the trials and tribulations in life, together, I am confident that you both will be able to overcome every obstacle in your path. Even more so if you were to have your friends by your side."
"Yeah!" Pinkie said happily, bouncing after another cookie, "Can't always be a gloomy mcgloomerston now can we?!"
Pinkamena gave a small smile and her half of the dreamscape lightened up by a considerable degree as she said, "No. I guess not. Thank you for listening, Luna."
"Anytime, my dear," Luna said with a smile.
With that, Luna left the dreamscape. The pulsing shadow from every other nightmare she had dealt with over the past few months once again left the dreamscape and headed in the direction Luna knew Canterlot to be in. She gave chase once more, but like every other time, the shadow evaded and escaped her. Heaving a sigh, Luna came back to awareness in her body and signaled the end of the night, thoughts of dual natures... and doppelgangers filling her head.