I looked up from my bowl of weetbix, having zoned out for a moment. Across from me was Pinkie Pie, her enormous plate of pancakes drowned in syrup had barely been touched and the blasted pony was still staring at me.
She did so the first day I arrived on his god forsaken rock and she’s done so every day since.
“Pinkie…” I deadpanned.
“Yeah DF?” the cheerful pony chirped.
“What in Equestria’s name are you doing?”
“I dunno, what are you doing?”
“God damn it Pinkie…”
I continued eating my breakfast in silence trying my hardest not to look up at the mare staring at me like I’m a zoo exhibit, but I suppose when you’re a hairless ape with a vision impairment in a world of multi-coloured ponies I expected a few curious glances and maybe a foal or two asking that God damned annoying question.
What’s wrong with your eye?
I shrugged the thought off and continued the rest of my morning rituals, finish breakfast, get dressed and figure out what the hell I’d be doing for the rest of the day.
Did I mention Pinkie had followed me and kept staring at me the entire freaking time!
“Pinkie, for the last time what are you doing?”
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve been staring at me even since I first met you….HOW THE HELL HAVE NOT NOTICED!”
“I have? That’s pretty silly isn’t it?”
“God damn it Pinkie…”
I tried to brush it off as Pinkie being Pinkie but it was starting to get really creepy, no matter where I went, what I was doing or who I was with the pink party pony would pop up and just stare.
I was starting to lose sleep over it. Of course given the fact that demon-spawn the town called Equestria’s best party pony watched me until the girl fell asleep herself made my life a living hell.
As I headed out the door to head to the library for the latest batch of dragonology books I heard the unmistakable ‘spring’ of Pinkie’s bouncing as she followed me down the street.
“Don’t you have somewhere else to be?” I asked.
“Nope!” Pinkie replied, as enthusiastically as ever.
I sighed and continued walking.
“God damn it Pinkie…” I muttered under my breath.
Reading no longer appealed to me so I tried to walk off my irritation. Since this morning I’d gotten a migraine from the annoying, infuriating sound of the pink mare’s bouncing.
That night was spent the same as all the others; hiding under the blankets until the sound of the pony-from-hell’s snoring filled the room, then sneak out to sleep on the couch.
I looked up from my bowl of weetbix, having zoned out for a moment. Across from me was Pinkie Pie, her enormous plate of pancakes drowned in syrup had barely been touched and the blasted pony was still staring at me.
She did so the first day I arrived on his god forsaken rock and she’s done so every day since.
“Pinkie…” I deadpanned.
“Yeah DF?” the cheerful pony chirped.
“What in Equestria’s name are you doing?”
“I dunno, what are you doing?”
“God damn it Pinkie…”
“Hey Dragonfire?”
“What?”
“What’s wrong with your eye?”
“I was born that way…”
God damn it Pinkie…