Cultural Artifacts

by Dan_s Comments


21) The Rock Cried Out No Hiding Place?

Dan's Comments

Cultural Artifacts - The Rock Cried Out No Hiding Place?

DISCLAIMER: My Little Pony is the property of Hasbro, Inc.

Day 34

        Armor fervently wished he was with Princess Luna bearding Nightmare in her lair. Anything is better than this, he thought as he looked down at Dinky's trusting expression.

        "He's gonna be all right, isn't he?" the little filly asked fearfully.

        "He's going to recover," he said, "But it isn't going to be easy. Someone who's been through something like this tends to act a little strange. They tend to remember it a lot more than is healthy. And they tend to act like it could happen again."

        "We won't let it!" the filly insisted.

        "And he'll believe that, but his mind will still react to things as if it might," Armor said, "You shouldn't go out and beat up the people who hurt him, or threaten people who set him off. You have to concentrate on him and each other."

        He took a deep breath. I hate this part, he thought.

        "The most worrying thing, is that people have an emotions tank. Like if you're scared, but you have to be brave, you put that fear in your emotion tank, and it will drain away after a while. Do you understand?"

        "Yes," Dinky said.

        Armor noted the others were listening just as closely. "His got filled up, and it is draining slowly. So something might slosh out or he might try to empty it by bailing it out. So he'll get scared, or angry, for no reason at all. Because he tried to put something in there, and something else sloshed out. Or he's trying to empty it so he can get better. Understand. He isn't mad at you. He isn't scared of you. He's just mad, or scared. Don't react, remember, he isn't scared or you, he isn't mad at you, he's just emptying the tank from something that already happened."

        "Can't he empty it faster?" Dinky asked.

        "How angry or scared do you want him to be?" Armor asked, "He can be pretty scary when he's calm. This has to go slow, for his safety and for yours."

        "We still love him," Dinky said.

        "That's good, show him that. That's the best way to help him heal. He's hurt, like a broken leg, he's going to be very wobbly for a while."

        "I had a broken leg, and a cast. Can't they use magic to heal him faster? Like they did me?" Dinky asked.

        "Empty his emotion tank quicker? Not safely. He's got to heal the old-fashioned way," Armor said. "Now if you feel a little bad and overwhelmed by all of this, go talk to Forget-me-Nots, she's seen this a bunch of times. You'll need to talk about it too. It's going to be confusing, but the stronger you can be for him, the faster he can recover."

        "Okay," the filly said quietly and nodded. She scampered off to hug her momma and cry in her mane.

        Armor signaled Lyra and Bonbon over. He led them a short distance away. "There may also be bouts of mania, him feeling so good he'll do things the Crusaders on a three-day sugar binge wouldn't think of. Those are even more dangerous than getting angry or scared. But if I've seen his behavior before, I think you're going to be dealing with depression, which is more frustrating. He just won't care, about anything. Frankly a kid like Dinky will handle happy, scared or mad a lot better than being ignored."

        "I understand," Lyra said, "How often does this happen that you can be such an expert?"

        "For ponies who fight, or do rescues, a lot," Armor admitted.

        The pair nodded worriedly and looked around at where they'd have to work from.




        Nurse Redheart covered the shivering form and checked that the heat from the blankets was not excessive. She was surprised by finding the Solar Diarch standing in the doorway looking in. There can be two reasons for that, the nurse pony thought, gave a final check to the set up and headed outside the room to confer, or be lectured.

        "Physically, his condition is excellent. There is lingering shock from the transformation, but that's easily cured by rest and light activity for a few days. There are no permanent injuries, physically."

        "Psychologically?" Celestia asked.

        "That is a very gray area," Redheart replied, still aware how this conversation could turn, "If he were a pony, I would have a regimen of treatment to help him through this. The classical term is 'sunstroke' although it has nothing to do with over exposure to the sun. How an alien creature would react to the trauma depends on how it perceived the trauma and many cultural and psychological modifiers. If he perceived it as merely the attack of prey animals, his recovery could be very quick."

        "We both know that he knows the intent of the attack," Celestia said quietly.

        "Highness, the counseling services of this hospital are slight, and they require that the patient be able to communicate. Perhaps Canterlot has the resources, all we can do is prep his caregivers and counsel them on his reactions."

        The wintery smile from Celestia warned Redheart she'd trod ever so slightly on the subject that the Diarch wanted to breach.

        Let her play her game, Redheart thought, If she wishes to discuss it, let her bring it up. I have no intention of broaching the subject, despite prompting to do so.

        "If he were a pony, what would you recommend?" Celestia asked.

        "There are drugs, mental therapies, didn't you attempt such a thing? I believe it had a less than desired effect," Redheart said, "So that's out. The alien's socio-sexual dynamic is very strange compared to ponies, so I wouldn't even begin to imagine what types of therapies that would affect someone who can't communicate their effectiveness. Blundering around would cause vastly more harm than good."

        "Perhaps, leaving Ponyville for a time. Fresh scenery," Celestia suggested.

        Well played, but we aren't morons out here, Redheart mentally replied, And he's my patient. I have to want him well, I don't have to like him as a person.

        "No," she said firmly. "At this point adding further uncertainties would not be good. The safe and familiar will be more therapeutic. We also have to consider the strain being put on his caregivers. Uprooting them will reduce their ability to give him the support he needs."

        "So your plan to slip him out of Ponyville has failed?" Celestia asked pointedly.

        Redheart steeled herself. "The plan, was to ensure his home, his new family, and what he held important would be safe. Safe from mad mobs of ponies, and safe from ponies who should know to leave well enough alone. His natural curiosity about this world would draw him away from Ponyville for stretches of time. In medicine, we have drugs that in pure form, or in large doses, are lethal poisons. Curare being the most obvious. Those same drugs, in proper, small, measured doses are miracles for those afflicted with various diseases and conditions. Small doses of him, scattered throughout Equestria might be very beneficial. As marethridatism against more dangerous poisons, if for no other benefit. The concentration at Ponyville would and has caused problems. Even Canterlot can't handle him, even small doses. He always winds up in a cell or a hospital bed."

        Celestia frowned at that. The pair stared placidly at each other. Celestia seemed to use the silence to draw more out of Redheart, while Redheart waited for a direct question.

        "Very well," the Solar Diarch said. "Please update me when his condition improves."

        "I shall," Redheart said and watched her leave. Once she was out of sight, the nurse sagged against a wall in fear and exhaustion.

        I don't ever want to do that again, she thought.




        I am both pleased and disturbed, Celestia thought as she walked out of the hospital, She believes she is right, and she will see him well, because of who she is rather than in spite of who, what he is. But why am I so pleased? Is it so rare in Canterlot that I must travel to another place to see it? Bonbon was the same. She did not like or have confidence in him, but she would not see him harmed while she stood idle. Why can I not feel as those ponies do? He fears to misbehave for fear of my wrath. Is that not a sufficient check on him? Why am I so certain it is not?

        She looked up as Luna and a collection of nightguards alighted on the Ponyville square.

        "Well met, Luna," she said.

        "Not as well as I might hope," Luna replied, "The temple is fallen, destroyed from within. But recently, and not by any magic. Consumed, as if the force that bound it together was withdrawn. Stone to stone, and the stones themselves fallen to powder. Nothing remains. In a few years, the forest will grow over it and nothing will mark the spot as different."

        "Nightmare would not have rebuilt her temple, then destroyed it, unless she was residing else where," Celestia said. Then she looked back at the building, and up to the room she'd just left. "She wouldn't be that stupid, would she?"

        "Hope springs eternal," Luna said, "I think I need to take a quick, noninteracting look around. He won't sense me, although I won't be able to do anything if Nightmare is there."

        "Do it," Celestia said.

        I can practically hear Bonbon and Redheart accusing me of hypocrisy, of decrying their distrust and acting on my own. But what choice do I have? Celestia silently argued, Discord, and Nightmare Moon, together, and is it worse if he can defeat or enthrall both of them, or that they overwhelm him? I don't know, I just don't.

        "Idiot."

        The accusation brought Celestia's attention back to the here and now. Luna glaring at her told her who had made the statement.

        "You have a pack of friends who would worship the ground you walked on, if you'd permit it. Who have faced, together, many of the ancient enemies, and bested all they have faced," Luna said sternly, as if lecturing a willfully stupid child, "And now you have a problem, and you won't share it with them. A problem on the very subject you sent your student out here to study. Or have you finally become a true Canterlot noble, too proud to admit weakness, and above all the hicks who live just outside one of the most dangerous pieces of real estate on the continent?"

        Celestia frowned at that, and her own foolishness. "Perhaps the teacher needs to be a student again," she admitted.

        "Perhaps. Cadence can hold the throne for a few more hours. She will have to learn to hold it longer than that shortly," Luna said, and gestured with her wing, "Go, we both have our tasks."

        Celestia bowed formally as so many others did to her, grinning at Luna's irritation. Then she cantered off to find Twilight and the Bearers.




        Luna glanced at her guard, her grim smile on her face. "We've got to get that girl a stallion friend. I think Rarity should have called her in first."

        "Considering the conflicted nature of their feelings towards each other," Sylvian Springs said, "They would have leveled the town, and made you an aunt."

        "You're right, we should have teleported him to the old castle, then sent Her Uptightness in alone," Luna agreed, "Very wise." Luna glanced around and her eyes fell on the Town Hall. Closed at this hour, but she had the keys. "We'll set up in there. I think a quick pass through is the best course of action."

        "Not at the hospital?" Sylvian Springs asked.

        Luna shook her head as she marched. "If he wakes and sees me, then all the subtlety is for nothing. This is close enough." She touched her horn to the locks, then pushed the doors open. She settled down on one of the rugs, and closed her eyes. " 'If you want to do something naughty to me, please wake me up first', where does the girl get the gall, and how does she manage to get labeled a mouse?" Luna asked.

        The transition was almost seamless, a disturbing change from slipping into ponies' dreams or squirming into his previous dreams like trying to put on undersized clothing.

        "The principal tenet of the religious is that God loves you," she heard, in clear Equestrian.

        He should be having a mental meltdown, and we get a philosophical debate, Luna thought as she headed through the formless expanse. No barriers could be seen, but visibility was a few yards. Like unseal walls. Something couldn't be seen, then was crystal clear.

        "So why isn't that what is taught," a younger voice said, "It seems so simple."

        "Because it is revolutionary. And the churches and governments suppress it. If the creator of the universe loves you, for all your flaws and faults, then what do you need church or government for? It's also a terrifying thought. But it fueled the Enlightenment, and the idea that each and every person has value and equal standing before the law."

        Luna stepped through the visibility limit, and saw a fried egg lying on the ground. An unbroken egg rested on the edge of the table, seemingly looking down. Bits of shell with dots for eyes and lines for mouths clustered around the fried egg, all of them taking notes.

        "So, flawed as I am," the whole egg on the table asked, "God loves me?"

        "Yes," the fried egg replied.

        Oh dear, Luna thought, I may have spoken too soon. She gingerly withdrew and headed off in another direction. She turned suddenly at the perception of being watched. Play your games, Nightmare. This time, I am ready for you.

        She walked through another barrier. The scale of what could be seen here was far greater. It needed to be. The music was a collection of gentle woodwinds, playing a slow and dainty melody. The dress was blue silk, tied at the waist with a yellow silk sash and decorated with embroidery or silk-screening of birds resting on branches or in flight. The birds were so lifelike that they seemed to fly as the dancer moved.

        Rarity would love to see that dress, but I'm not bringing her in here to see it, Luna thought, as she watched the figure in the dress combine a slow graceful dance with the serving of tea. Luna caught scents of jasmine, bergamot oil and darjeeling. Celestia would love a cup of that tea, she thought, desperately trying to avoid the central focus of the scene. The server/dancer wasn't a reptile, despite the dorsal spines and alligator-shaped tail. That's a mountain carved to look like a reptile! NO, that's the creature from that movie we all watched! Luna thought of the gray-brown dancer, as a cup of tea, she could have easily bathed in was set before her, a graceful pirouette and bow, and a mint leaf a yard across was added so harmoniously, it made not a ripple on the surface of the tea. The step ladder added a moment later, and the fan the size of a small house flipped open to hide a girlish giggle. All without the earthquakes that a being that size moving should have created with every step.

        Luna stepped up and elegantly slurped up some of the most delicious tea she had ever had in her life. She bowed to the server, who coquettishly hid behind the fan to hide `her` blush.

        Okay, Fluttershy as a full-grown dragon, Luna thought.

        "Fool, enjoying your tea?" Nightmare asked as she appeared.

        "You!" Luna hissed.

        "I am here, and here I stay. I must thank your ponies for paving the way," Nightmare exulted, "Normally he would resist, but filled with fury at your ponies, and self-loathing, he will AWK!"

        Nightmare had forgotten the server, who caught her between two ribs of her fan, and plunged the struggling mare of darkness into one of the immense tea cups. And held her there as bubbles rose to the surface.

        The server bowed, and Luna took her cue to leave.

        Weakened and battered, his constructs can more than handle whatever Equestria can throw at him, Luna thought, I need to finish my assessment. Nightmare is not the greatest problem here. She trotted away as quickly as decorum allowed.




        The paw that dragged Nightmare coughing and sputtering out of the tea was not the immense monster's who had thrust her in. "Discord!" Nightmare hissed, "Your treachery knows no bounds! I will punish -!"

        Discord held her under the tea for a while longer.




        The singing was nonsense, but it drew her as it would have drawn any pony.

        "Les pan-zer, les pan-zer. How I love les pan-zer."

        Luna spotted the Big Guy in a chef's hat and apron. He had a caldron on an open fire and danced lightly across the grass space he'd set up as a makeshift kitchen. A short distance away was a corral full of immense, armored war machines. Their tracked chassis were surmounted by revolving turrets that 'looked' around, as if seeking an escape. One of them was chained down near the caldron. Despite having no eyes or other features, she sensed their terror and pleas for rescue aimed at her.

        "Love to chop and to serve little tanks. First you cut off their heads," he sang as sliced off the revolving turret. He then reached inside. He threw other humans, who were probably the crew, out of the tank. "Then you pull out their bones, ah mais oui ca c'est toujours delish." The crew men took one look around, and he let them run for their lives.

        "Les pan-zer, les pan-zer. Hee hee hee, hah hah hah. With the cleaver I hack them in two," he sang and sliced the huge machine in half, and pulled the huge chunks of metal out of the rearmost compartment. "You pull out what's inside and you serve it up fried." He dropped the two oil-dribbling chunks into the caldron, despite that they shouldn't have fit.

        He shouldn't have been able lift them, Luna thought in amazement.

        "God, I love little tankies, don't you?" he asked Luna s his dance carried him near her.

        She shied back. How did he spot me?! she wondered, And am I on the menu?

        He continued addressing her as he worked, "Here's something for tempting the palate. Prepared in the classic technique." He whipped out a hammer than was bigger than he was. "First you pound the tank flat with a mallet." The squashed tank's wheels rolled off in all directions and the long tube mounted on the turret sailed off toward the horizon. The other tanks seemed horrified by their companion's fate.

        "Then you slash off their skin." The cleaver came out and removed the thick slabs of metal that armored the turret, top, and sides of the vehicle. The crew took the hint and ran for their lives as he flipped the huge machine upside down. "Give their belly a slice. Then you rub some salt in, 'cause it makes it taste nice." He lopped a section off and offered it to Luna.

        She reluctantly accepted, but sniffed at it. It's Germane chocolate cake, she thought, Okay, just go with it. The taste was absolutely heavenly.

        "Zoot alors, I have missed one!" he called from behind the corral, "Sacre bleu, what is this?" He began dragging another armored vehicle towards the caldron. If his previous prey had been huge, this one was absolutely immense. The metal belts encircling the wheels spun frantically, but couldn't prevent him from dragging it forward.

        "How on earth could I miss such a sweet, little, succulent Maus," he sang. The roar of the vehicle's engine failed as smoke poured thickly out of the back. The crew bailed out and ran in all directions. He lifted the massive machine, then stuffed it in a five-gallon bucket.

        Luna mentally shrugged as she continued feasting on the chunk of cake.

        "Quel Domage, what a loss. Here we go, in the sauce," he pulled the massive vehicle from the five-gallon bucket, and swatted it with a bag of flour. "Now some flour I think just a dab."

        He pulled out several loaves of Fancy bread and stuffed them down the two differently-sized tubes in the turret. "Now I stuff you with bread." He hugged the larger tube. "It won't hurt, 'cause you're dead! And you're certainly lucky you are."

        He lifted the vehicle over his head and stuffed it in the caldron. " 'Cause it's gonna be hot in my big silver pot! Tout-aloo mon pan-zer, au revoir."




        Discord senses a lessening of Nightmare's struggles. He dragged her to the surface of the tea.

        She glared at him, he grinned back and waited.

        "I will put you through this indignity a thousand times before -" she threatened.

        He shoved her back under and waited.




        Luna had no idea where she was. The myriad humans drank coffee, some moved containers around in the darkness. Dawn was fast approaching. Holes and trenches dotted the area, even ones large enough for the vehicles. She spotted one young male who moved like the Big Guy, and she noted how differently he moved than the others. A grace and tentative purposefulness with which he walked. And far more quietly, she thought as she wended through the crunch of boots on loose rock and snow. But you almost don't hear him.

        He paused by one absolutely terrified youngster in a deep, sandbagged hole. Despite not being physically much older, the Big Guy seemed old by comparison. The youngster sat in the bottom of the home with hands clasped tightly, shivering not from the cold but from fear.

        "O Trinity of love and power! Our brethren shield in danger's hour," the youngster tried to sing but ended up chanting instead, "From rock and tempest, fire and foe, protect them wheresoe'er they go; Thus evermore shall rise to Thee glad hymns of praise from land and sea."

        The youngster looked up ashamedly at the veteran looking down at him. "Relax, only one nation has ever given 'what for' to you Yanks repeatedly, and we're together with you on this one."

        The youngster gulped and nodded. He checked the headset and the microphone he was manning. The Big Guy continued to the six vehicles strung out in line abreast. Unlike the tanks, these had belts on their front wheels and regular wheels in back.

        But the drivers are at the back, Luna noted as she walked close, Strange.

        These too had turrets, but four smaller guns surrounded the man at the center of the turret. Strange domed boxes attached to the side of the guns, and several more rested on the bed of the vehicle, with troops to do whatever they'd do with them.

        The Big Guy walked among the crews, checking on them. Luna caught subtle and not so subtle differences in the uniforms, equipment and even the style of speaking. They seemed to all speak basically the same language, but the differences were notable.

        Another youngster, this one the Big Guy saluted.

        "The men are turned out and we're ready. Cloudkillers are set. If your ships can do their job, we'll ambush the ChiComs for once," the Big Guy said with a feral tone.

        "Lot of bait," the youngster said nervously, "Yours and ours."

        "They're all 'ours', captain, every mud marine, Anzac, Tommie and Bloggins of them, sir," the Big Guy said mildly, but the youngster still flinched. The Big Guy saluted and moved off.

        Another soldier approached the shaken captain. He was smaller, darker skinned and had an aura of cheerfulness. "Don't worry Captain, he like you and trying to make you good soldier. If he not like you, you already have tragic accident. Been in service to the King since centurion was rank, not a tank. When we win, then he'll be happy."

        Luna chuckled at that, but followed the Big Guy. He fished a small telescope out of his heavy coat and looked to the east. Luna could make out a few vehicles similar to the ones he'd been skinning, or the flame throwing type she'd encountered in a previous dream. She realized that they were dug in on a small hill overlooking a large plain, and troops were advancing towards them. No, the first group are retreating this way, the others are pursuing them, she realized.

        Flares appeared over the battlefield, illuminating the field. The pursuing forces made the mistake of pausing, while the pursued opened the distance. The vehicles began firing. Upper pair of guns, then the lower bank, then the upper bank again. The pursuers scattered, letting the pursued open the distance more as they struggled forward.

        Luna saw many of the pursued were wounded. A few vehicles were loaded down with wounded as those in better condition walked along. At some signal, the distance had opened enough, and the world exploded. Explosions appeared amid the pursuing troops trying to find cover. The frightened young human stood with his headset, microphone and a pair of binoculars and spoke into the microphone.

        That's what he thinks Celestia will do to him, Luna realized, as she scanned the skies and the ground. She could see small objects coming in at speed, but couldn't see what had thrown them. Death from an unseen source, with no ability to answer and no place to hide.

        She caught one glimpse of the Big Guy looking grimly satisfied at the slaughter of unknown numbers of enemies, to save his people. They are alike, she thought as the vision faded.




        Discord hauled Nightmare out of the tea, again. He paused and waited for her to quit sputtering and coughing. Then he waited for the threat, insult or violent escape attempt from her. When it didn't come. "Are you willing to listen?" he asked.

        The tea-logged creature stared hatefully at him. She sighed. "Do I have a choice?" she asked.

        "Certainly," he raised her up as if to plunge her beneath the surface.

        "I will listen," she said tiredly.

        "You come here, he will destroy you," Discord said without malice, "You and your 'world of darkness' don't really have a comparison here. You are unbelievably outclassed. What you believe are the depths and benefits of evil are absurdity of the wildest sort."

        "And you are the expert?" she asked, "You have plumbed all of the darkness in his soul?"

        "I have seen the darkness he's walked through, and refused to let touch his soul. A very different thing."

        "Then he will be mine," she said tiredly, "You know what the ponies tried to do to him? What he escaped by the barest margins?"

        "I am aware of your hand in it. And so is he," Discord said, "It still is nothing." He looked at her tiredly. "I have seen things that have shown me the folly of your vison."

        She laughed at him.

        "Oh, then perhaps I can save you another way. If you will not surrender, then you will have to depend on pity." He dragged her out of the huge teacup and across the field, pausing only long enough to let her get her feet beneath her.

        "What could you possibly have seen that could match the reality of what I am?" Nightmare asked dismissively.

        "There are things that even the void will not look upon willingly. You don't even come close," Discord said warily as he escorted/dragged her along.




        Celestia was vaguely disappointed that Twilight hadn't been in the library, and when she'd tracked her down to Sugarcube Corners, only Pinkie was still awake. Different from her reputation, Pinkie had quietly slipped out of the collection of sleeping mares to walk outside and speak with Celestia. Pinkie even quietly closed the door behind her.

        Pinkie did look closely at her, and saw the lack of regalia. "Celestia?" she asked carefully.

        "Yes, I was hoping to speak with you and the others," Celestia said.

        Pinkie looked back to her friends, then apologetically looked to Celestia. "I think they need the rest," Pinkie said, then she brightened, "I know I can help."

        "Thank you," Celestia admitted.

        "Her Highness needs to think about how to use her resources," Pinkie said quietly, "I didn't realize, until I saw him as an alicorn, that maybe she sees something she really wants, painfully needs, but it isn't hers. I was angry that Fluttershy was 'stealing' him, and delighted she'd found someone so wonderful. Both feelings frightened me. Maybe her Highness needs to accept that he can only be her friend, not her possession. But he would want to help her with her problems."

        Celestia nodded. "But he's dangerous."

        "As awful as it sounds," Pinkie said, her head bowed, "Maybe Bonbon's idea isn't so bad. Giving somebody what they really want, so they do what they and you want, is that really tricking them?"

        "Yes, but perhaps not with malice," Celestia admitted, "But that isn't what stands before us now."

        "Yes," Pinkie admitted, "The real question is: what is her Highness going to do about the ponies who hurt him? I already know most are saying 'it was the Poison Joak, not me'."

        Celestia started at that.

        "So, the Poison Joak didn't bring out anything that wasn't already there," Pinkie said and looked away, "This is bad."

        "Yes, it doesn't have the power to make what doesn't exist, merely change things a bit," Celestia said, and realized what Pinkie had been hinting at. "It could make a stallion handsome, a mare beautiful, but not make a glamor that would enthrall ponies. Nightmare. She had a hand in this."

        "Going the other way actually," Pinkie said, "Some of those who hated him most, were snared hardest and did the worst. I think you are looking in the wrong place for darkness. Those ponies had it in them before he ever arrived. He just fanned the embers. Although embers of darkness really doesn't work. Something that fans embers makes it brighter and warmer, this made them darker and colder. Threw snowballs, bigger, set off the avalanche, too big."

        "I understand what you mean. And I don't have a good meta - for it either," Celestia said.

        Pinkie giggled. "But her Highness still has to think about the ponies. If they can blame what they did on something outside them, they'll never look at the real problem."

        Celestia nodded. "Quite a lot to tell her Highness," Celestia agreed. "What about your anger?" she asked.

        Pinkie thought deeply. "I haven't found an answer for that yet. I'm angry about what they did, I'm angry that I didn't get the chance to cuddle with him, I'm angry that because of what happened, he'll never do that again so I'll never have the chance," Pinkie said, and sighed, "And I'm angry with Pinkie, because she may have started it all."

        "How so?" Celestia asked.

        "By invading his home, twice," Pinkie said, "By starting to knock out the pillars that let him feel safe. I didn't realize how much ponies needed a safe place, until I . . . ," she trailed off, "I make things. Nobody cares, but I'm afraid to talk about them. He was so happy when he saw one of my toys, even after everything else that happened to him." She smiled, but the smile faded. "Then I realized I hadn't mentioned it, because I didn't want to be teased about it. I had a secret place, and kept everyone away from it. Yet I invaded his. That's not right." She shook her head.

        "Perhaps you can make it up to him," Celestia offered.

        Pinkie's grin was a particularly poignant one. "That's been worrying me."




        Luna stared in horror at the choir of clams singing and the images that formed out of the unseen. Her sister, alone amid a party, ignoring the food and festivities around her to pick up the grains strewn about and walked on by the celebrants.

        "Ah, look at all the lonely people. Ah, look at all the lonely people. Lovely Celestia picks up the rice in the church where a wedding has been," the clams sang.

        The desolate Celestia in her apartments had a sign saying 'Smile on Pain of Death, Luna is returning.' as she opened the door to the courtiers, her smile appeared.

        "Lives in a dream, waits at the window, wearing the face that she keeps in a jar by the door. Who is it for?"

        "All the lonely people. Where do they all come from?"

        Luna hissed as Discord appeared, but not as the arrogant chaos-bringer, but as a lost soul staring at the tiny figurine of a rearing Celestia, spinning on a music box that provided beautiful accompaniment to the singing of the clams.

        "All the lonely people. Where do they all belong?"

        "Poor little Discord, writing the words of a sermon that no one will hear. No one comes near."

        He set the figurine on a table, laid his head beside it and simply stared at the glittering jewel as the light illuminated it from different angles. He had none of the hubris or egotism of his usual demeanor. His attention focused solely on the figurine and the flashes of light it caught and reflected.

        "Look at him working, darning his socks in the night when there's nobody there. What does he care?"

        Images of the arguments, Luna remembered Discord and Celestia having. And worse, the consequences of each being unchecked without the influence of the other.

        "All the lonely people. Where do they all come from? All the lonely people, where do they all belong?"

        The scene was Celestia's coronation as monarch, after the defeat of Nightmare Moon.

        "Ah, look at all the lonely people. Ah, look at all the lonely people."

        Why the ponies around her celebrated. Celestia reacted to even the hint of Luna being there, or anything that would have caught Luna's attention. As it went on, these distractions went from troubling, to heartbreaking. She finally walked out into the statue garden and stopped before one in particular.

        "Pretty Celestia died in the church and was buried along with her mane, nobody came. Poor Little Discord wiping the dirt from his hands as he walks from the grave. No one was saved."

        The scene blurred. Luna realized it was her own tears at the terrible loneliness of her sister, laid out so clearly.

        "All the lonely people (ah, look at all the lonely people). Where do they all come from? All the lonely people (ah, look at all the lonely people). Where do they all belong?"

        Luna turned and ran from the scenes that continued to play out.




        Nightmare looked at the peaked cap and light-gray, military uniform that Discord had materialized and now wore. "Playing dress up?"

        "Trying to save your life, and giving you a lesson in the value of pity," Discord answered.

        "I have no pity for these fools," Nightmare replied.

        "You'll learn the value of it, soon enough," Discord said as they walked. The walls of the place were just posts, with barbed wire strung between them. Inside were huts and outbuildings where humans alone or in small groups walked. Guards were in evidence, but they there all ponies dressed in uniforms similar to Discord's and even Nightmare felt uneasy about this.

        "I am supposed to be afraid?" Nightmare asked, "The prisoners are humans, the guards are ponies. It shows he has gone insane, nothing more."

        "Then you are a fool. All you have to do is hold out, until April 15th. Most of those inside don't even know they have hope. You do. But I doubt you'll do as well as them. If he were to find you wandering around outside, in his mind, he'll tear you limb from limb. The guards here were originally humans, for a certain value of 'human'. He finds you in there, I guarantee you'll survive. He might actually listen to your pleas, and feel pity for you."

        "This place cannot hold Nightmare," she boasted.

        "There are nightmares, and there are nightmares," Discord replied and stepped up to a bored-looking pony in a uniform similar to his own. He clicked his heels and raised an arm. The bored clerk raised her foreleg languidly.

        "Gypsy, she thinks she has magic powers," Discord said.

        Nightmare tried to break away, but Discord's grip was firm.

        "There is no magic for them here," the clerk said without mirth, and accepted the packet of papers from Discord. Two ponies dragged the struggling Nightmare inside.

        "You'll pay dearly for this!" she shouted at him.

        "Yes," Discord agreed, "But not to you." He saluted the clerk again and walked off. A locomotive pulling a long line of cattle-cars passed between them and Nightmare lost sight of Discord.

        Nightmare found her shape-changing powers were useless, and her other powers had been stripped from her. She was an ordinary horse, and nothing more. "You cannot hold me here."

        The guard chuckled, but ignored her.




        "Fifty-six!"
        "Fifty-six!"
        "Fifty-six!"
        "Fifty-six!"
        "Fifty-six!"
        "Fifty-six!"
        "Fifty-six!"

        The disjointed chorus of cries had drawn her, but Luna looked at the tall wall before her and sneered. "Even if I couldn't fly, I could jump over this." She took to the air to see what the commotion on the far side of the wall was about.

        As she topped the wall, a slug of mud hit her in the face hard enough to shock her into tumbling back to the base of the wall.

        "Fifty-seven!"
        "Fifty-seven!"
        "Fifty-seven!"
        "Fifty-seven!"
        "Fifty-seven!"
        "Fifty-seven!"
        "Fifty-seven!"

        Luna cleaned the mud out of her eyes and off her face. "I deserved that," she admitted, and started walking along the base of the wall.




        Shining Armor walked the empty streets of Ponyville. This could almost be a dream, or a nightmare, he thought idly of what they'd found, among the ponies, and outside of town. I know how excited some ponies can get, and how the nobles react, but I never through regular ponies could get like that.

        "Bit for your thoughts?" Cadence asked as she approached.

        He approached slowly. "Aren't you . . . ?"

        "Luna took the throne. I decided to come here to keep an eye on you. And to see what I could do to help," Cadence asked as she approached. Something in his expression forestalled her usual nuzzle, and instead she fell in beside him. "This really is bothering you, isn't it."

        "All of it. I'm supposed to maintain order in the capital, and defend their Highnesses. Something that, up to the appearance of Nightmare Moon, I felt wholly confident I could achieve. Now, I'm not sure I can do anything. I'm not even sure from where the next threat comes. This one shook their Highnesses' faith in their own ponies. Mine too. How do I defend against that?"

        "By remembering that some ponies rescued him. Yes, I heard the preliminary reports," Cadence admitted, "Expecting every pony to be a stew of good intentions without the faintest hint of corruption is foolishness. Some ponies are just bad. Not like Sombra or Nightmare, but they care so little for others, some don't even care about themselves as long as their schemes go ahead."

        "That's what bothers me. We both know a pony who could so easily go that way. Did Celestia send her here to prevent that? Is, my own sister as dangerous as that?"

        "Twilight isn't malicious. She doesn't have an evil bone in her body," Cadence said.

        "It was thoughtlessness that did the real damage here, not fanged, cackling evil. And we both know that Twilie can become fixated to the point of not eating and not sleeping."

        "You can't look after her forever, and she does have friends who look out for her. She didn't participate. She didn't help, but she didn't take part," Cadence replied.

        "This time. What about next time, or the time after that. I guess what I'm asking is how do I make Twilight see other ponies around her, their needs and desires, without her being as obsessed with them as she is with books and schedules?"

        "Patience. She's learning, and I think Celestia has a plan for her," Cadence said, "Now, speaking of obsessive unicorns. Somepony needs some sleep."

        "Can't sleep, the dreams will eat me," he said, not altogether jokingly.

        "Then I'll have to be there to keep them away," Cadence said as she bumped her flank into his to steer him to the temporary quarters.




        "Discord!" Luna hissed as she faced off against the chaos spirit. Suddenly appearing beside her was a weapons' rack. In it were a white duck wearing a sailor's tunic and cap, and a black duck with a white collar.

        "Even I'm not going to try and explain that joke," Discord said, "Say! I bet you're looking for Nightmare. Well, guess what. I found her and put her in a wonderful place. But first, the commercial."

        "Where is she?" Luna demanded, lowering her horn and preparing to charge.

        The image changed to a snowy landscape. Somewhere, Discord had obtained a guitar which he strummed happily. "The day the river freezes, is the day it won't seem fair," he sang as he walked along the road. An officer gestured for troops resting in ditches and trenches to get up and move into a nearby town. A much younger version of the Big Guy was among them. " 'Cos they'll come to get the river lady and I don't think they'll care."

        The troops walked or jogged into town. In the middle of the town several, very large weapons were dug in. The crews jeered at the infantry.

        "I know they'll scrape her paint off, in their same, old, foolish ways," Discord sang, "Now the people see the river, but the old ship's gone away."

        Discord nodded to the road leading into town. Coming out of the treeline were three of the huge 'panzers' that the Big Guy had been butchering and cooking earlier.

        "Water turns cold and gets to freezing," Discord sang as the weapons fired shot after shot at the trio of behemoths, to no effect.

        So much for confidence, Luna thought as the infantry added their weapons to the unequal battle.

        "Before you even know it, the old girl's easing, away from her berth, round by the point and out of our view," Discord sang, ignoring the return fire that reduced the weapons and their arrogant gunners to flaming scrap, and the smaller weapons that ripped the other infantry to shreds.

        Luna looked at the red staining the slush and snow, and considered how anyone could survive.

        "Off in the mist her engines pounding, back on the banks, that old horn's sounding," Discord sang, and pointed to the Big Guy and two other solders running away, but running perpendicular to the route of advance of the monsters. "A little good-bye, a little I'll do what I must do. A little good-bye, a little I'll do what I must do."

        Discord sang while these metal monsters continued through the town. The weapons in their turrets, or on their front hull destroying any weapons or soldier, who stood up to them.

        "I know I will remember, when I cannot hear that horn, that would roll up by the mountains," Discord sang, "As she took us through the storm. I know they've got to take her, but I can't say I approve, 'cos she's won so many battles that I hate to see her lose."

        The Big Guy and his two companions had taken up positions on several low buildings. They waited for the trio of 'panzers' to come down the street. Then each one of them jumped down on the panzer. The Big Guy jumped on the front one. Each soldier did the same, shoved a grenade through a hatch and jumped off the panzer before the rapid fire weapon could cut them to pieces.

        "Water turns cold and gets to freezing before you even know it, the old girl's easing," Discord sang as smoke and screams emanated from the three panzers. "Away from her berth, round by the point and out of our view."

        The crews bailed out, and the trio of soldiers, used their own fast-firing weapons to cut the opposing soldiers to pieces, before they ran from the vicinity. Luna noted that the crews weren't young men, but older boys. That hadn't stayed the Big Guy's hand.

        "Off in the mist her engines pounding, back on the banks, that old horn's sounding a little good-bye, a little I'll do what I must do," Discord sang, "A little good-bye, a little I'll do what I must do."

        Each of the three machines exploded, sending a column of smoke up to meet an annulus, to form a mushroom like shape.

        "Water turns cold and gets to freezing, before you even know it, the old girl's easing. Away from her berth, round by the point and out of our view," Discord sang as he and Luna returned with the Big Guy to the site of the initial penetration to search for and rescue survivors. "Off in the mist her engines pounding, back on the banks, that old horn's sounding a little good-bye, a little I'll do what I must do. A little good-bye, a little I'll do what I must do." Discord's guitar vanished. He watched the Big Guy and several other soldiers check for survivors among the fallen.

        "Those were the most feared tanks on the battlefield. 'A little good bye, a little I'll do what I must do' indeed. Do you begin to understand a little more? Nightmare is not going to be a threat, when that isn't a crazed nightmare, but a memory. There are far darker things than her lurking about."

        "She'll have to be dealt with," Luna insisted, "And I don't trust that you can contain her."

        "Like I said, I found her and put her in a wonderful place," Discord said.

        "Where is she?" Luna demanded, again lowering her horn and preparing to charge.

        "Can't you just accept my word that it's no where you want to know about? No?" Discord said, "On your head it all shall be."

        "Where is she?" Luna asked angrily.

        "The name wouldn't mean anything, but suffice it to say, she can't get out, and she'll be no danger to you or anyone else, after the Big Guy releases her."

        "How do you know that?" Luna asked as she circled, looking for an opening.

        Discord let his head rotate as he watched her, grinning the entire time. "I bet you want to see for yourself. Why didn't you just say so? Come this way. You'll see all the recreational activities, and healthy exercise, and of course the stirring music and cultural exchanges. And the best part, it's so orderly. Celestia would just love how everyone lives in Harmony. People who would have hated each other with a passion before coming there. They're like brothers now. A few flare ups, but still, united in purpose."

        Luna reluctantly followed. "What about him?"

        "Scattered all over," Discord admitted, "Pieces here, pieces there, all fragmented. Your 'little ponies' did a better job than even I could manage. Tell Celestia how proud she should be of them. I'll give even odds he'll take his own life within the week. Ends her problem and she gets to cry about it at the funeral. 'Tragic loss of life' in public, then hysterical giggles of relief in private."

        Luna ground her teeth as she followed.




        Selene Dreamer had slipped away from her keepers. She felt the disturbance as clearly as others sensed the sun and moon. While the adults bustled around her, or slept, she moved with quiet purpose. Like a clanging bell she could track the source. And like a master weaver she could sense where the knot was that destroyed the art of the entire tapestry. The knot drew her. She could feel the skeins that she needed, and those who would stay away.

        Mother is the first, but she is in her elsewhere, she thought as she approached the unicorn filly sleeping under her mother's wing.

        Selene Dreamer put a hoof over the filly's mouth to forestall the outcry when she woke unexpectedly.

        The filly looked at the little alicorn who gestured for her to follow. The unicorn slipped away from her mother and followed into the room. The smell of illness and disinfectants assaulted her nose, but Selene Dreamer stayed her course.

        Had the disturbance been sound, it would have been beyond deafening. But she ignored her discomfort. She knew that there was a simple cure. She collected the filly and raised the pair of them to the bed. There she saw the source. She sensed more tangles that she could unwind in her long lifespan, but untangling one would allow the others to unknot in their own time.

        She gestured for the filly to take up a position at the creature's chest, as she placed herself to guard his neck. His arms surrounded the filly of their own accord, and the slight muscle spasms eased. She positioned herself and felt the knots loosen ever so slightly. She let herself drift off, riding the skeins to see where they led, and to whom.

        So many, she thought idly, No wonder Aunty Celestia is frightened. Then she caught a connection that nearly gave her an attack of the giggles. She stifled it, but only just. Oh, that will be funny, she thought, And, one other, ah, yes. Welcome who I once was and am no longer. You are a fool. But even Discord gives you a chance. If you fall, none will deserve the blame but you. She again fought back chuckles from the realization of what one act would untangle everything. She nearly injured herself thinking about proposing that one solution, and the terror of all. She returned to riding the skeins to less fascinating connections. Seeking the ones who would untie the knots she saw in their myriad numbers.




        Luna jumped to her hooves so quickly her guards searched for the attacker. When she took one staggering step, then another, they changed their search to locate a bucket for her Highness to use.

        She waved away their concerns. "I am, satisfied with my investigation. Nightmare is contained, for now. And if she survives, she will be much diminished." She walked past them and into the night air, taking great gulps of it. Trying to smell Equestria, and blot out the memories of what she had seen. Where Discord had placed Nightmare, what the Big Guy had faced in his youth.

        "The guards were all ponies," she gasped, "That bodes ill. Fortunately no specific ponies were in evidence. But such a place. He promised it would be burned to the ground. But such a place can never be forgotten. Not by those who touched it. Oh Equestria, for you to have fallen so low to even be considered in the same breath. You have become a Hell indeed."

        None of her guard remarked on her maunderings. She walked slowly through the darkness, and realized that there were even greater darknesses that would have ground up her and her sister and not even noticed the difference.

        And he fought them, Luna thought, With hundreds of thousands of his fellows, but he still fought them. Her mind staggered under the load of implications, and that he had been casting ponies as the actors in the remembrances of those darkest of vignettes that plagued his thinking. No longer safely locked away. The closet is sprung and they lay upon the ground, tripping up any unfortunate enough the find them. And even disordered and scattered across his mental landscape, his instinct is to cast ponies as the worst of the worst. Not the soldiers, those remained human. But the prison guards, the commanders and commandoes, those are all ponies. Those who would face him openly are humans. The knife in the dark, the one hiding behind civilians, the ones enforcing the 'Final Solution' were all ponies. This is a fell day indeed, and Nightmare bears only some of the blame. But Discord was correct, she will receive her dose of reality without buffer. Those who acted as she desired already distance themselves from their actions. It is time perhaps to reeducate them, on what that glamor could and could not do. She took a deep breath and steeled herself for what lay ahead.




Day 35

        Luna had collected her daughter as the sun rose, having assured herself that neither Selene Dreamer nor Dinky were in any danger from where they had chosen to sleep. The Big Guy was still under magical sedation and would not be waking for several hours.

        Luna found Celestia and Pinkie Pie in the library. Both looked exhausted but happy. The stains on their teacups indicated they had spent the entire night drinking tea.

        "And what were you discussing?" Luna asked as she carried her resting daughter on her back. "All night, while exhausting Twilight Sparkle's tea supply."

        "Division and application of resources. Of actual versus apparent needs, vis a vis those resources," Pinkie said, surprising both Diarchs, and setting Pinkie giggling.

        "Ideas and theories," Celestia said and frowned, "If you are here, and Cadence is here, and I am here, who's running the country?"




        Nightmare shivered at what she had seen, and been subjected too. Night brought its own terrors. In her dreams within a dream, she regained her full powers of shapechanging, magic and her vast physical prowess. But there were still terrors. Terrors she was unable to manipulate with her lies. Terrors she was unable to frighten with her shapeshifting. Terrors who could be battering into bloody rags or dust, but always returned.

        Tonight was no exception. The figures were human children. Emaciated to near skeletons. Their sunken eyes, broken-toothed smiles and spindly limbs and fingers only accented their unponiness. Scabbed over wounds and a stench of vague decay completed the image. Nightmare shied away from them. She had killed hundreds once, and the next 'night' there had been just as many.

"Where once was light, now darkness falls. Where once was love, love is no more," they sang in mockery of her own goals and ends, "Don't say goodbye. Don't say I didn't try."


        They crowded around her. They never touched her, but they endlessly reached at her. She could not ignore them. And flight by wing or shapeshifting never worked. They pursued.

"These tears we cry are falling rain. For all the lies you told us, the hurt, the blame," the thin reedy voices clawed at her self-control, "And we will weep to be so alone. We are lost. We can never go home."


        "So you are sent from him, and have seen the truth," she sneered.

"So in the end I'll be what I will be. No loyal friend was ever there for me. Now we say goodbye, we say you didn't try," she replied in song.

        "I have your measure now, and will hunt you down and destroy you," she told them.

"These tears you cry have come too late. Take back the lies, the hurt, the blame. And you will weep when you face the end alone. You are lost. You can never go home."


        Nightmare sneered at that. Then felt the darkness closing in around her. Blotting out the figures, muffling their voices and their stench.

"You are lost. You can never go home."




        Luna sat on the throne and stared at the pony trying to make the case. "But stained glass windows would make every home more beautiful. And mandating them to be in every home would stimulate the economy."

        Luna stared at him, and gave a sigh of one taxed beyond all endurance or caring.

        "I think you've traded sufficiently on her Majesty's patience," one of the functionaries said.

        "I demand an answer!" the pony shouted up at the throne.

        Luna glared, and drew a foreleg across her throat.

        The pony blanched and let the guards and functionaries lead her away. "She didn't mean," the pony gulped, "I haven't done anything to deserve that."

        The guards stared at her.

        "It means your time is up, and good day," the functionary said, "If she wanted the headspony, she would have said."

        Two ponies approached. "This cat is a champion mouser. And he's mine, that he also hunts in my neighbor's barn is irrelevant. He's mine."

        "He comes to me when he wants food or when he's sick, I've taken responsibility, rather than just ownership," the other pony replied heatedly.

        Luna gestured to a guard carrying a poleax, instead of the regular spear. She made a chopping motion to the guard. Both ponies blanched. They looked at each other and began retreating.

        "We understand your Highness. We should seek to settle this between ourselves, rather than burden the Lunar Diarch with it," one pony said, retreating with head bowed.

        "This is all your fault," the other whispered, as she bowed her head to the Lunar Diarch.

        "It wasn't my idea to come here," the first hissed back. "I wanted to go to the mayor."

        The pair were galloping away once they were out the door.

        Sir Eagle Bell approached with a sheaf of papers on the revenue disbursement of joint royal-business cooperatives and recommended go forward plans. Luna rolled her eyes, but pulled out the writing desk and began going through the papers. She stopped at the first one. Clearly written in Eagle Bell's impeccable handwriting was 'Does Luna know you're `subbing` for her? Does Celestia?'

        Luna extracted a quill and carefully wrote, 'No, but with the records kept, they can fix anything I do.' She signed it 'Woona' and nonchalantly handed back the paper, while she continued pouring through the disbursement schemes.




        The sun saw the return of Canterlot delegation to the Capitol. And while no one specifically commented on the sloppiness of the sunrise, they all felt that Celestia or Luna needed a bit of rest and distance after that thoroughly lackluster performance.

        Pinkie retired to her room, with a plan in mind. But it needs time. Oh no, I'll have to be patient! Her hair 'deflated' and she threw her self on her bed to hide her wails of torment.




        Twilight left Sugarcube Corners after being roused by Pinkie. She'd missed the Princesses' departure. Why do I feel like I failed her, and she wants me to know it? she wondered, and considered her own paranoia about her relationship with the Celestia. I should just tell her than I love her. I'm not disgracing my mother, but being grateful to the mare who raised me from fillyhood. Who schooled me in things my mother would never have access to. Who opened my eyes to all the world, then tossed me among all these crazies so I'd learn about things outside of books and how what I had learned from books could be applied.

        Her kitchen was immaculate, especially suspicious was the very empty tea cupboard. The note clinched it. Twilight wasn't sure if she should laugh or be horrified by the contents of the note. 'IO - Twilight, lotsa tea. Celestia, Princess, Solar Diarch of Equestria, Protector of the Crystal Empire,' the additional titles filled up the entire page with Celestia's exquisite but tiny horn writing, and the back of the page, ending in 'etc.'

        I've never even seen half these titles, even in the most formal settings. 'Chief Hoofball Cooker for the Diamond Dog's Empire'? she looked at the empty tea cupboard, Coffee will be needed to face this day.

        Spike wandered down as Twilight brewed. "There has to be a faster way to brew strong coffee," Twilight murmured, "An express way."

        "No," Spike said, "The Princess forbid you to experiment with coffee, after the incident."

        "No pony got eaten by that plant. It was perfectly harmless, once we realized it needed moonlight not sunlight to grow properly," Twilight replied testily. "I know I can get it right, this time."

        "I believe that's why she forbade you to try," Spike replied. "Who cleaned up in here?"

        "Pinkie Pie and her Highness were having a tea party in here and, they - must - have - cleaned - up." Twilight's mind rattled to a stop as the idea of Pinkie doing a meticulous cleaning job, ran headlong into the other, the only, possible alternative. "Celestia cleaned my kitchen. She actually did manual labor because I was asleep elsewhere," she gasped.

        "I'll get the fire extinguisher," Spike said as he ran from the room.




        Dash stared at the little snow globe, turning it over and watching the flakes cascade around Cloudsdale and down on Canterlot. Then she turned it over and watched the display again. She was aware of Tank watching from a distance, and she could guess his expression was of worry. After perhaps the hundred and thirty-eighth repeat, she set the globe aside and rolled over on her bed and stared up at the ceiling.

        "I was just the diversion," she said quietly, "Fluttershy was the hero. Rarity was the hero, even Bonbon was the hero. I was just the diversion."

        Tank hovered over her and smiled down at her. She picked him out of the air and set him on her chest.

        "I'm okay. Just feeling a little used. I mean, my friends were making fun of me. Then when there was a really important rescue, they had me off leading the mob after Mare Do Well. They didn't even trust me to do that alone. They had Rarity and Derpy as another diversion," she told Tank as she idly rubbed his head.

        While Tank appreciated the attention, he seemed troubled by Rainbow's unRainbowlike behavior. His stare somehow penetrated the mental fog she was in.

        "Look, I can understand they didn't like me grandstanding. Trixie's grandstanding really ticked all of us off. But this was different." Rainbow glanced at Tank's upraised eyebrow. "It was!" she replied. She huffed in exasperation. "Anyway. Now the action where I could actually do something is over. The headshrinkers have to figure out what to do next. And they have no more idea than," Rainbow said. Her silence, leaving the thought unfinished alarmed Tank, who nudged her hoof to get a reaction. He slowly opened his jaws to bite her, when she seemed to wake up.

        "That's it!" Dash shouted, "A pet. That's what he needs. Now there were cats in that book of costumes Rarity had. So there are probably dogs, and birds, and turtles."

        "Tortoises," Pinkie shouted.

        Rainbow looked around, seeing no sign of Pinkie Pie, she continued, "Anyway, that's what'll make him feel better, a pet."

        Tank was smiling at her. Then she realized the problem with her plan. "How are we gonna tell him what we're doing?" she lamented, "I mean the only one who knows Equestrian and Monster-talk is Discord. And," Rainbow trailed off and started grinning.

        Tank retreated into his shell.

Les Panzer based on Les Poissons: Alan Menken & Howard Ashman
Eleanor Rigby: Lennon, John Winston / McCartney, Paul James
River Lady: Roger Whitaker
Long Ways To Go Yet (feat. "Gollum's Song"): Howard Shore